Y&R Transcript Wednesday 2/25/09 -- Canada; Thursday 2/26/09 -- U.S.A.

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Provided By Suzanne
Proofread By Emma

Cane: Answer the question, Billy.

Billy: Is that how you treat your only brother?

Cane: You should be lucky I haven't taken my only brother's head off.

Jill: Don't you dare start this in front of the baby.

Chloe: Billy, what are you doing here? Just in the neighborhood? Or did you come to tell us something?

Billy: I wanted to see my baby.

Cane: Cordelia is my daughter, not yours. So how about we get that clear right up front.

Sharon: Mom, exhaustion?

Noah: How serious is it?

Sharon: Well, it's serious enough.

Doris: The doctor said a couple of days of rest, I'll be as good as new.

Sharon: Mom, you have got to start taking better care of yourself. I need you right now.

Noah: Since you're gonna be okay, do you mind if I get my books from Eden?

Sharon: How do you know that she even has them?

Noah: The bag was right there when we ran out of the store. She had to see it.

Doris: It's fine with me, Honey, if it's okay with your mother.

Sharon: Check in with me later?

Noah: Will do. Glad you're gonna be okay, Grandma.

Noah: Hey, it's Noah. Grandma's awake. Everything's okay. My mom said I can meet up with you and get my books. Assuming you picked up the bag. I'm headed to the coffeehouse. Where are you?

Gloria: Michael, where are you? My hearing is in less than an hour. And I can't believe I still haven't heard from you. Now would you please call me? Or something?

Lauren: Eden? What are you doing outside? It's cold.

Eden: Everyone was staring at me in there, so I asked if I could wait out here.

Man: Are you her parents?

Michael: I'm Michael Baldwin. I'm her legal guardian. This is my wife Lauren.

Lauren: Honey, you said you were being arrested.

Eden: He said I was shoplifting.

Man: I caught Ms. Gerick leaving the store with stolen merchandise.

Michael: Where is it?

Man: In the manager's office right now for safekeeping. The police are on their way.

Michael: I thought we'd left this kind of thing behind.

Eden: I didn't steal any books. I was in the wrong place at the wrong time.

Michael: The wrong place at the wrong time? You know who you sound like? Lowell. Lowell. An excuse for everything. I'm sorry, it just--just came out.

Eden: You know what? If you thought I stole the books, then just let the cops take me to jail. I don't even care.

Phyllis: Let me guess, you're waiting for Eden?

Noah: Hey.

Phyllis: Hi.

Noah: How did you know? I left her a message to meet me here.

Phyllis: Between you and me, I'm glad that your parents let you guys stay friends. But shh.

Noah: It's only 'cause you stood up for us.

Phyllis: Well, I know what it's like to be your age and just crazy about somebody.

Noah: So... you and Dad? Everything okay?

Phyllis: Uh...

Noah: Look, if you don't wanna talk about it, that's cool. I just kinda got the feeling things weren't so great lately.

Nick: So this isn't about Colleen?

Jack: No, actually, I wanted to talk to you about Sharon.

Nick: Well, no wonder you lied.

Jack: Sharon's in a bad place, Nick, a very bad place.

Nick: Yeah, I know she's been beating herself up about Brad.

Jack: Well, yes, Brad is part of it. I think you're the real problem. Starting with the night you spent at the cabin.

Nick: That's none of your business.

Jack: As Sharon's husband, it sure as hell is my business.

Nick: You're getting a divorce.

Jack: Yeah, well, unlike you, I happen to care what happens to Sharon.

Nick: Hey!

Jack: The way you're treating her is inexcusable. You sleep with her, then you toss her aside so that you can patch things up with Phyllis. Sharon is reeling right now. So stay away from her, Nick! Do everybody a favor and stay away from her, like you keep telling her you're going to do.

Doris: Honey, what's wrong?

Sharon: Nothing. It hasn't been a great day. You know, just... and then I got so worried when the hospital called.

Doris: And what else?

Sharon: Um... it's just... it just--it's--it just doesn't seem to stop. There's just... there's so much pressure and--and all of these bad things keep happening. And I... I get overwhelmed, and then I get-- I-I make decisions that... I know are not good for me.

Doris: Are you talking about Nick?

Sharon: Well, yeah, but more than just that. And then, um... sometimes I, uh... I just... I-I space out. I forget things.

Doris: What kind of things?

Sharon: Well, it's like, um, I'll--I'll just blank out and then I'll--I'll jolt back. But for a few seconds there, I... I don't even know where I was or what I was doing. I'm sure that it's just-- it's stress-related and it will go away, but it's pretty freaky when it happens.

Doris: Sharon, you have these problems before. Remember? After I had my accident.

Sharon: Mom, no, okay? No. I don't wanna talk about that. Okay, can we please just not talk about that?

Lauren: You're not going to jail.

Eden: This wasn't my fault.

Michael: Then how did those things you didn't pay for wind up in your shopping bag?

Eden: It wasn't my bag. It was Noah’s.

Lauren: Noah's?

Eden: Sharon bought him books. The same ones that I came here to get. She gave Noah the bag and then she got a call that her mom's in the hospital. So she and Noah took off. It wasn't until they were out the door I realized that he forgot his bag. So I ran out to get him, that's when the alarm went off.

Michael: Look me in the eye and you tell me you didn't do this.

Eden: I didn't do it, Michael.

Michael: Okay. Okay, we'll get to the bottom of this. You stay here. Come on, let's go.

Eden: What? It's not a crime to make a phone call.

Michael: Excuse me? Miss? Uh, I was wondering if we could talk to your manager and if you could tell him that it's urgent.

Woman: Sure. Okay.

Michael: Thank you.

(Cell phone buzzing)

(Keypad beeps)

Michael: You see! It's another missed call! I hate this phone!

Lauren: All right. You know, I'm sure the manager's gonna drop all the charges once he hears Eden's story.

Michael: Oh, great, see, it's from Gloria. She's probably losing her mind because her hearing's about to start and I'm not at the courthouse.

Lauren: All right, then, Honey, go take care of your mother. And I'll handle things here.

Michael: Okay. Okay. Thank you.

Lauren: Love you.

Michael: Bye.

Lauren: (Sighs)

Phyllis: No, I'll make sure that he knows that we can't push that deadline any further. Yeah, I'll make sure he knows. Okay, thanks. Okay, what were we talking about before I got so rudely interrupted?

Noah: I shouldn't be butting into your life like that. I'm sorry.

Phyllis: No, no, I-I like that you care. I like it. So as--as for your father and I, um... we're kind of going through some stuff. All married couples do. It's okay. It's--it's not a big deal. Things--things are getting better.

Noah: Good.

Phyllis: Yeah.

Noah: I'm glad to hear it. You're a really great stepmom, and I want you to be happy.

Phyllis: I am happy.

(Cell phone ringing)

Noah: Oh! It's Eden, finally. Dude, where are you?

Eden: At Trumble's still.

Noah: You found my books. Way to go.

Eden: Yeah, except some of the books inside-- they weren't on the receipt. They think I stole them. They're arresting me, Noah.

Billy: I didn't know he was gonna be here.

Cane: Yeah, well, since I am, why don't you leave?

Jill: You are both welcome here, if you start behaving like adults.

Billy: Look, I didn't come here to cause any trouble, okay? I just came here to give something to the baby.

Cane: Yeah, well, whatever it is, Billy, she doesn't need it. I'll provide for her, like I have been providing for her since she was conceived.

Billy: Not quite.

Chloe: What is it?

(Box rattles)

Billy: It's a rattle. See? It's original, huh?

Esther: I'm sure the baby will love it.

Chloe: That's very sweet of you.

Cane: Yeah, real sweet. Billy Abbott, king of the one-night stands, and now he's the proud papa. Give me a break.

Billy: So the one time I'm not a jerk and you can't take it?

Chloe: You know what? I think I'm gonna take the baby upstairs.

Jill: Good idea.

Cane: You know what? If Billy was as noble as he claims, he would put Cordelia's welfare first. And he would turn around and he would walk out the door and he would keep going, straight out of the baby's life.

Phyllis: All right, so, um, who else have you called besides Noah? Are Lauren and Michael here?

Eden: Michael was, but he had to go to court. Lauren's inside talking to the manager.

Phyllis: All right, um, I gotta call your dad.

Noah: Whoa, Phyllis--Phyllis, no. I don't want my dad finding out unless he has to. Please?

Phyllis: All right, maybe Lauren and I can handle this, but if not, I gotta call him. I have no choice, you know that.

Eden: You know I didn't do this.

Noah: Of course you didn’t. What I wanna know, how'd those extra books get in the bag?

Eden: I don't know.

Noah: Okay, don't worry about it, okay? I'm sure there's an answer. It'll all work out.

Lauren: You know, if he's even halfway reasonable, he's just gonna let Eden explain what happened. It'll be fine.

Phyllis: I feel bad for those kids. They must think that the world is conspiring against them. Every time they go out and live life, it's like bam!

Lauren: It seems like that, doesn't it?

Sean: I'm Sean Tyler, the store manager. How can I help you?

Lauren: Hello, I'm Lauren Fenmore. This is my friend Phyllis Newman.

Phyllis: Hi.

Lauren: We're here to talk to you about Eden Gerick.

Sean: If you're referring to the girl who was shoplifting, I really--

Phyllis: Oh, you know what? Eden is a great kid, really. This must be a big misunderstanding.

Sean: Actually, no. It's theft.

Lauren: Okay, uh, I'm in retail, as well. Fenmore's department stores? And believe me, I share your frustration. Bu I know Eden very well.

Sean: Where's Mr. Baldwin?

Lauren: Well, he was called to court. He's an attorney, and also Eden's legal guardian, but my husband thought that we could handle all of this without the police's involvement.

Sean: Well, he thought wrong. I don't like lawyers, and I won't back down. Ms. Gerick was caught red-handed.

Phyllis: Listen, I'm sure there's a misunderstanding. We can explain, Sir.

Sean: Yeah, well, let me explain something to you, Ma'am. I am sick of these kids coming in here and swiping stuff, thinking their parents are gonna save their butts. I'm gonna make an example of Ms. Gerick, and I'm gonna prosecute her to the full extent of the law. So you can tell Mr. Baldwin it's a good thing he's a lawyer.

Phyllis: Wow.

Lauren: Well...

Nick: Where do you get off lecturing me about Sharon? I've been totally honest with her, which is a hell of a lot more than I can say for you.

Jack: Totally honest? After the kiss in Paris, you said you two needed to stay away from each other. Sharon came home, she needed some time, some space. She went up to the cabin. You knew that. Still, you followed her and took advantage of her that night, just as you're taking advantage of her now.

Nick: I have no idea what you're talking about.

Jack: I am talking about your seeming inability to make a choice in life and stick with it. Why else would you go to Sharon's hotel suite and tell her you remembered your anniversary? You think that's fair, messing with her head like that? That what you call being totally honest? Leading on not one, but two women?

Nick: Phyllis has handled this situation extremely well. She is my wife. She's--

Jack: Yeah, well, she was my wife, too, once. If she's doing well with this, it's only because she's scared to death she's gonna lose her marriage. Inside, she's probably as screwed up as Sharon. You be careful, Nick, or you're gonna push both of these women over the edge.

Sharon: What'd the nurse say? How's your blood pressure? It was low when you came in.

Doris: Sharon, I'm getting wonderful care. You're the one I'm worried about.

Sharon: Okay, well, why don't you just get some rest and, uh, close your eyes. I'll be over here.

Doris: The same thing happened when I was paralyzed. You felt responsible for my accident. You fell apart, you started losing time. You took on all of that guilt, just like you're doing now.

Sharon: He could've stayed at the cabin until the storm was passed. I sent him out there to die.

Doris: Oh, Sharon. Sharon, you had no way of knowing what would happen. Or that Noah would need rescuing. It was just circumstances, coming together. You are no more responsible for Brad's death than you are responsible for my car spinning out of control that night. I made a choice to come looking for you, just like Brad made a choice to save a life. We both knew what we were doing carried a certain amount of risk, and we went ahead anyway. We made our decisions. You cannot take this burden on your shoulders, Sharon. It's too much for one person to handle.

Cane: So why are you showing up now and staking your claim, after you've done everything you can to avoid it? What's in this for you? You know how much this baby means to me.

Billy: You're barely related to her, and through me. Delia's my kid.

Jill: Come on. Cane has a lot invested in her.

Billy: Oh, yeah, he does. Let's see, he paid for a couple of doctor's appointments and he bought a crib, but that doesn't make him a father.

Cane: What, and you are? What have you done for her?

Chloe: Will you guys chill out? You're giving me a raging headache right now.

Esther: You know, I think it's wonderful how much you both care about little Cordelia, but do we need all of this hostility?

Cane: Esther, take Chloe and Cordelia upstairs, please.

Chloe: Oh, so now you're giving me orders?

Esther: You--you know, Sweetie, if your head hurts, maybe its better if we just go upstairs. You just got out of the hospital. You gotta lie down.

Jill: Go on. Go on. I can handle it here.

Billy: It might be a good idea to give Delia’s ears a rest, okay?

Chloe: Okay.

Cane: Okay. See, maybe I haven't made myself clear to you. I'm not gonna lose this baby. Okay? So you have two choices-- you leave on your own, or I'm gonna help you out.

Michael: All right, you listen up. Speak only when you're spoken to. I don't want a repeat of the bail hearing. You look the judge in the eye and you express remorse for everything you've done wrong. You think you can handle that?

Gloria: I'm not an idiot, Michael.

Michael: I'll take that as a yes. Look, I have a good feeling about our chances, but if you blow this, you're going upstate for a long, long time. And trust me, the county jail's a 4-star hotel compared to the state penitentiary.

Gloria: Believe me, I'm scared out of my wits. Just tell me what else I need to do.

Michael: Well... Ms. Stevens.

Heather: Counsel.

Michael: I trust you received the new discovery material I sent you?

Heather: I got it.

Gloria: Oh, my, if looks could kill, I'd be in a pine box already.

Michael: No.

Man: His honor would like to start in five minutes.

Michael: Works for me.

Nick: It's almost funny, coming from you. Yeah, I've made a mistake. But I admitted it to both Sharon and Phyllis. But it wasn't malicious. Unlike a lot of the crap you've pulled.

Jack: I'm sure you'd like to make this about me. It's not, Nick. I am not the reason Sharon is losing it. Stay away from her.

Nick: Okay, you listen to me, if Sharon needs me, I'm going to be there for her, whenever. And if you don't like that, tough.

(Cell phone ringing)

Nick: Yeah.

Phyllis: Hey, is everything okay?

Nick: Yeah. What's going on?

Phyllis: Um, I'm at Trumble’s book store downtown. Eden is about to get arrested.

Nick: For what?

Phyllis: Shoplifting. Lauren is here, so is Noah. Um, the store manager-- he's being a bit... indignant. We thought maybe you could reason with him.

Nick: (Sighs) Uh... of course. Yeah, uh, I'm on my way. I gotta go. But the next time you wanna blame someone for Sharon's problems, why don't you take a look at yourself.

Doris: I think you should talk to a therapist. There's no sin in asking for help, Honey.

Sharon: I don't need to talk to anybody. I don't need any help. Okay?

Doris: Sweetheart...

Sharon: Mom, not today. Please, just stop it. I don't wanna talk about it, all right? Oh.

Doris: What's that?

Sharon: Uh, it's a... ceramic elephant.

Doris: Well, you act like you've never seen it before.

Sharon: I-I haven’t. I don't know how it got here. The last time I used this purse was... Brad's funeral.

(Cell phone ringing)

Sharon: Oh. Hello?

Nick: Sharon, it's me. Uh, I just got a call. Eden's been caught shoplifting.

Sharon: What? Where?

Nick: Trumble's book store. Noah's with her. I'm on my way over.

Sharon: I'll be right there.

Billy: You think you're tough? Well, then come on, Cane.

Cane: I'm really gonna enjoy it.

Jill: No, stop it. This isn't gonna solve anything. Billy, just leave until we can talk about it rationally. Come on.

Billy: No, no, this is my child and I have to leave? It's easy to see what side you're on. Come on.

Cane: Yeah, 'cause she knows what a loser you are. You go around trampling on everybody's lives, thinking you'll get away with whatever you want, but not this time. I lost a future with Lily 'cause you and Chloe wanted to put yourselves first. You put yourself above everybody else, including the little girl upstairs! I wanna know, how do you think you're gonna raise a baby when you can't even manage to take care of your own pathetic life?! So why don't you do us all a favor, crawl back to Hong Kong, okay? And while you're doing it, say thank you--thank you, God, for giving me a responsible brother who will clean up my mess.

Billy: Look at you. Big martyr. Take on the world.

Jill: Stop it.

Billy: Make Mommy proud. That's your whole life, isn't it, man? Do you wanna know why Lily dumped you? Because she was tired of being with a mama's boy!

Jill: Oh! Oh, my God! Stop it! Stop it! Don't you dare!

Billy: Yeah.

Chloe: Stop it. Will you stop it, please, for the sake of my--oh, my God. Billy, you're bleeding. Come here.

Billy: No, no, no. Don't bother.

Chloe: Bill...

Jill: Billy...

Chloe: What?

Jill: All right, he's gone. You need to calm down.

Cane: Mom, could you please take Esther and, uh, Cordelia upstairs. I'd like to have a word with Chloe, please.

Judge: I read your motion to dismiss all charges in light of the new evidence you provided this court. Very compelling, Counselor.

Michael: Ah. Thank you, your honor. I'll pass your compliment along to Paul Williams.

Judge: Ms. Stevens, how would the state like to proceed?

Heather: We'll stipulate to the medical affidavits concerning Emma Gibson’s cause of death-- anaphylactic shock triggered by a severe food allergy. As for their contention that the tainted product cannot solidly be linked to the defendant, the state would like to proceed--

Michael: Oh, your honor, your honor, the chain of custody is nonexistent. The state can argue all day that my client tampered with that product, but where are the witnesses? The documentation? The security camera footage?

Judge: I'm ready to rule. Unless Ms. Stevens would care to finish her thought?

Heather: I have nothing further to say, your honor.

Judge: Putting a caustic substance that produces dangerous, painful, potentially disfiguring burns and blisters into a product that could possible-- and, indeed, did-- make its way into the hands of the general public was an irresponsible, reckless, and, quite frankly, moronic act. We're talking about a cleaning solvent, not unlike drain cleaner. It boggles the mind. The utter corruptness of an individual who would endanger the life of dozens of innocent people. The callous disregard--

Gloria: Your honor, may I please say something? Just one thing?

Judge: No, you may not! I'm talking! You are going to sit there, in silence, and take your medicine.

Noah: Mom, the books had to come from somewhere. Did you put 'em in your bag by mistake?

Sharon: No, I didn't, and neither did the store clerk.

Eden: Well, I didn't take them. I didn't touch the bag until you and Noah left. It's totally unfair that I'm taking the rap for this.

Phyllis: Hey, guys, thanks for coming. Um, Lauren is talking to the store manager, and trying to convince him no to prosecute, but it doesn't look good.

Noah: This is such a load of crap!

Nick: Son, he's doing his job.

Noah: All right, fine. But just don't blame Eden, 'cause it wasn't her fault.

Phyllis: Yeah, I'd have to agree. I don't think this was intentional.

Sharon: Well, of course, you would say that, wouldn't you? You're the one who talked Nick into letting our son hang around with this girl in the first place! She's a liar. She's a drinker. And she's a thief!

Nick: Okay, Sharon, come on.

Phyllis: What is your problem?

Sharon: You're my problem, Phyllis! You are! Why don't you stay the hell out of this?

Noah: Eden's none of those things you just called her. Take it back.

Sharon: Honey, you are too young to be a good judge of character, okay?

Noah: Like you and Dad really have your lives together.

Nick: Okay, Noah, that is enough. Sharon, can I please talk to you for a second?

Noah: I'm sorry about my mom. I just hope whatever Dad says to her helps.

Jack: Wow. What's the other guy look like?

Billy: Can I, uh, get a towel or something? Please?

Jack: Yeah, I think you're gonna wanna put some ice on that.

Billy: Thank you.

Jack: Wanna tell me what happened?

Billy: Cane's fist. That's what happened.

Jack: Where did this go down?

Billy: At Mom's house. I wanted to see the baby.

Jack: I thought Chloe was still in the hospital.

Billy: They got discharged. I thought maybe if I saw her, Cordelia that it would help clarify things.

Jack: And did it?

Billy: It clarified how much the bartender hates me.

Jack: So did you swing back at him?

Billy: Mom was all hysterical and the baby was there. It was just...

Jack: Wow. So you took the high road?

Billy: You could say that, I guess.

Jack: So... how did this get started?

Billy: Cane signed the birth certificate.

Jack: Knowingly?

Billy: Hey, look, he is Chloe's husband. So for now, legally, he is the father. Just I-I'm not sure what I wanna do yet, you know?

Jack: Well, do you wanna be Cordelia's dad?

Billy: After today, you're damn right, I do.

Lauren: Well...

Nick: The manager won't budge?

Lauren: Nope. He said he's gonna see us in court.

Nick: That's a little harsh.

Lauren: A little?

Sharon: How can you two be so blind? This girl--this girl-- she is disturbed! I mean, just look at her upbringing! And now, I mean, she's just gonna take Noah straight down with her!

Nick: Okay, Sharon, come on.

Sharon: No. No. No, Nick. No, come on, no more second chances. We did it your way, or should I say, Phyllis' way, and now our son is hanging out with a thief!

Nick: Okay. Then--then we'll try your way. I'll--I'll talk with Noah and tell him they need to cool it for a little while.

Sharon: Thank you! Thank you!

Nick: Okay. Are you feeling okay, Sharon? I-I know you've been having a rough time lately.

Sharon: Please, Nick, please.

Nick: Well, I just-- if--if--if this is about us, and--and what we've been going through, I just want you to know that I haven't abandoned you. I'm here if you need anything at all, okay? Anything.

Sharon: Okay, stop it, stop it, stop it! No! Listen to me! If you are trying to just set me free, then why don't you do me a favor and stay away from me, okay? There is no more "You and me," so why don't you get that through your head!

Judge: What kind of loathsome individual would perpetrate such a crime? For what motives? Money? Power? The sheer thrill of hurting people?

Gloria: I'm gonna be lucky if I don't get put on a chain gang.

Michael: Shh.

Judge: It is my personal belief that the defendant, Gloria Bardwell, is the one who perpetrated this act. I'd like to lock her up and throw away the key. Unfortunately, I can’t. Because my personal beliefs have no bearing on the facts of this case. Mr. Baldwin is correct that the chain of custody for the open jar of cream cannot be established. I, therefore rule that evidence to be inadmissible. Am I missing something, Ms. Stevens? Any other tricks up your sleeve?

Heather: Given your honor's ruling, I'm afraid we have nothing else linking Ms. Bardwell, specifically, to the crime.

Judge: And since you stipulated that Emma Gibson’s death was not a result of the face cream, I have no choice but to vacant all charges against the defendant. It rankles me to say this, but you are free to go.

(Bangs gavel)

Gloria: Michael. Michael, you did it. You did it! I'm so proud of you. And I am so grateful.

Michael: You're welcome.

Gloria: Now that I'm finally out of that stinking jail, I can get my cell phone back and I'm gonna call Jeffrey and have him come pick me up.

Michael: Jeffrey? Jeffrey? Are you crazy? Have you lost your mind? Jeffrey?

Gloria: Yeah, probably. I can't help it, Michael. He's the perfect man for me and I love him. And I can't stand being by myself. Thanks for saving my life again.

Cane: What's that for?

Chloe: It's for your hand, Rocky.

Cane: Don't you pretend to care about me after what you did.

Chloe: All right, don't make me have to explain myself again.

Cane: Listen, I've had enough of your excuses. I signed the birth certificate and Cordelia is my daughter. God knows, you couldn't take care of her all on your own, and Billy's not an acceptable parent. And that poor kid is not gonna have a life stuck with you two.

Chloe: That is not true. It's not true. I love my daughter.

Cane: You risked her life to go and see your boyfriend in a raging snowstorm. It was reckless and immature. And you call yourself a mother? No, you are a child, and you're a selfish one at that.

Chloe: Huh, what are you saying? That you could do a better job? Is that what you're saying?

Cane: Okay, if you wanna live here, that's fine. But know one thing, I will be coming around. You know, it's funny. 'Cause you got what you wanted. You now have a Chancellor father for your baby. And if you try and keep her from me, I swear to you, I'll cut you out of her life.

Billy: Jack!

Jack: Easy. Easy. It's not broken. It's probably gonna be black and blue for a few days.

Billy: Man, I would love to return the favor.

Jack: Is that why you're in such a hurry to play daddy? You wanna stick it to Cane?

Billy: No, Delia’s my kid. I love her. I do, Jack. We have a connection. All the good stuff you're always talking about.

Jack: Okay, in that case, anything you need to protect your rights-- legally, financially-- it's yours.

Chloe: Listen, you may be able to push Billy around, but I am Delia’s mother, and you can't change that, can you?

Cane: If you defy me, I promise you, I will do whatever it takes to prove that you are crazy and unfit.

Chloe: I'm sorry. Are you an expert at this? Have you ever had a kid before? You can do no better than Billy or me.

Cane: You know why I feel sorry for you!

Chloe: Oh, you do?

Cane: 'Cause you're crazy about a guy who doesn't care about your or want you. And I don't want you and Cordelia-- she doesn't even need you. So, I'm now calling the shots. I'm in charge. Do we understand each other?

Chloe: Oh, God.

Gloria: Jeffrey, I was hoping you'd pick up because I've got news. The hearing's over. I'm free. Cleared of all the charges. Is that son of mine brilliant, or what? And I just want you to know I'm going to ignore all those things you said about getting a divorce and moving on, because I know you didn't mean it. So you call me when you get this. I've been so lonely without you, Baby.

Michael: So... I see you're still here.

Eden: Not for long.

Lauren: How did the hearing go?

Michael: Oh. Gloria's out. It's done. I'm brilliant.

Lauren: You are brilliant!

Michael: Uh, Eden, what did you mean by "Not for long?"

Lauren: Um, well, the store manager wasn't gonna budge. And as soon as the police come, they are going to arrest her for shoplifting.

Michael: All right, all right. Listen, little sister... let me tell you what's gonna happen when the police roll up. They're going to read you your rights, and then they're going to take you in the squad car to the juvenile facility. I'm going to be in my car right behind you. And once you get there, they're gonna do some paperwork, they're gonna take your photograph, get your fingerprints. And then, they're gonna release you into my custody. You are not going to jail. I promise, okay? And not a word to anyone while you're there, understand? I know all the family court judges. Believe me, those charges aren't gonna stick.

Eden: I don't care about the charges. Right now, Nick is telling Noah that he can't see me anymore.

Nick: Sorry, Dude, but your mom insisted this time, and I have to go along with her. But I can't say I disagree. Maybe in a few months, we'll reevaluate things, but for now--

Noah: A few months? This is a joke.

Phyllis: You couldn't sway her, huh?

Nick: How can I? You know, Sharon's right. Eden's had her chances.

Phyllis: What else did Sharon have to say?

Nick: Nothing. Why?

Phyllis: No reason. It just seemed like she had a lot more on her mind than just Noah, that's all.

Nick: Could be.

Sharon: I don't know how it got in my purse. I don't know how it happened. Maybe somebody thought it was a joke. (Sobbing)

Next on "The Young and the Restless"...

Esther: We never talked about moving.

Roger: I can sell your share of this house to Jill.

Karen: I saw you kissing her, Neil.

Neil: It's not what--

Karen: No, no, no, shut up.

Cane: I wanna marry you.

Lily: What?

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