Guiding Light Transcript Wednesday 1/23/08

PLEASE CLICK TO DONATE TO OUR SITE!!!!

Provided by Suzanne
Proofread By Tanya

There's no way this fate could be caught

there's no God that would to be hurtin' like I am

and what's my soul to do when there's simply no more of you?

This bitter sea of my regrets can forgive and won't forget

there's not a price too high no amount I would not pay

if someone could only take me far away

from the ache that voids my soul

steals light from my every day

someone could only take far away far from here

and if time would only turn turn me back a single day

the other road I could have taken

would make this go away would make this all okay okay

from the ache that voids my soul

steals light from my every day

someone could only take me far away

far from here so far away from here so far away from here so far away from here.

Lizzie: This, my friend, is a bum test. I am so pregnant. I... I don't believe this. Every single one of those tests, defective? There are girls like me all over the country buying them and getting false negatives. Crawls, smoking like chimneys, drinking espresso, eating fish with high mercury levels. Their babies are going to be seriously messed up. This is, like, a serious epidemic. Hi, is this the help line? This is a matter of national importance. Yes, I followed the directions three times. Well, yes, I'm sure. Well, because I've already seen a doctor. I... I... I... no, I didn't take the test there. No, you don't understand me! I have to be pregnant! I have to be! (Cries)

Bill: So, my sight is like lights and shadows.

Doctor: That's probably just the beginning.

Bill: Just the beginning? What do you mean? Just the beginning of getting my sight back? Just the beginning so I can play ball with my kid and not get hit in the head with the ball?

Doctor: Well, there's no permanent retinal damage. It's just a matter of recovery time. How old is your son?

Bill: Or it might be a daughter. Just don't know yet.

Doctor: Oh! Well, congratulations to you and your wife.

Bill: My wife? Thanks. So, next time I see you, hopefully I'll see you, right?

Billy: Yeah, I'll take it from here, Doc.

Bill: Dad

Billy: Yeah.

Bill: How long you been there?

Billy: Long enough to hear the best news that I've heard in a long time.

Bill: Yeah, well, you should have said something. Nobody likes a sneak.

Billy: Is this how it's going to be between us?

Bill: Thanks for coming, but I've got a cab waiting.

Billy: No, hey, look, look. Let me be your ride. I'll take care of you and you can take care of me, so I don't ever have to come back to a place like this. And look here, here, here, here. I got you this so you can... help you find your way around.

Bill: I'm doing all right on my own.

Billy: So, look, you know, I heard you when you were talking to the doctor...

Bill: Oh, did you? You really should have told me you were there.

Billy: Hey, come on, I'm not drunk. You're getting your sight back.

Bill: Well, maybe.

Billy: Yeah. And you're having a baby.

Bill: No, Lizzie’s having a baby, okay, Dad?

Billy: Not everybody gets a second chance. Don't blow it. Now, we are going to go... hey, we're going to go to church.

Bill: No, we aren’t.

Billy: Oh, well, try to run away. We'll see what happens here. (Laughter)

Reva: Jonathan, I know what you're doing, even though you said you weren't going to. Whatever you've got planned... Jonathan! Jonathan! Damn it!

Alan: Lynn, I'm expecting a phone call from a friend of mine. Has anyone called Company looking for me?

Lynn: Sorry, Mr. Spaulding, no one's called you here today.

Alan: Really? Maybe they called home. Here. 20 messages?

Tammy: Hi, it's me, Tammy.

Josh: How you doing?

Cassie: I'm fine. I'm fine.

Josh: You don't have to be.

Cassie: Well, I just don't want to lose it in front of the boys. I came a long way since last year, and I just... I just still really miss her.

Josh: It's okay.

Will: Don't forget the tissues, Mommy.

Cassie: I won't, I won’t. I have them right here.

Josh: Will, do you want your... your hat and gloves? It's so cold outside.

Will: Alan makes Mom cry. He's a bad man, right?

Josh: Listen to me, all right, Will? You need to behave yourself today. This is a tough day for your mom. Can you promise me you'll do that? Will?

Daisy: I'm so sorry, Cassie.

Cassie: Thanks, Daisy. Thanks for coming. I'm really glad you're here.

Daisy: Yeah, because you're always... if you're not... I mean, sometimes I still... I never should have been in that car.

Josh: Daisy, it wasn't your fault.

Remy: What do you think she'd be doing if she was still here?

Marina: She'd be telling you to straighten up and fly right.

Remy: Well, maybe I would if she was still here.

Marina: I would have asked her to be a bridesmaid.

Remy: I bet she would have liked that.

Marina: Depends on the dress.

Billy: This is a good time for you to make amends. The family suffered a lot. We've lost Tammy, and then losing Jonathan and Sarah so quickly afterwards.

Bill: You think Lizzie’s going to be at this thing, and that's the only reason why I'm here.

Billy: Hey, you made it through Venezuela.

Bill: I don't want to talk about that right now.

Billy: And you just found out that the accident isn't going to wreck you permanently.

Bill: Accident!

Billy: You know what your problem is?

Bill: Huh?

Billy: You hold a grudge. Come on. This family has been through a lot. Now we've got a chance for a little joy. Whether you like it or not, you're going to be a daddy. So just suck it up and let's pay homage to your cousin, okay? Hey there, sweetie. Hi. You want to sit with us?

Lizzie: I don't think so.

Bill: Well, that didn't sound good. How did she look?

Billy: She looks great.

Bill: No, I mean, did she look like she wanted to smack me one, or that she really couldn't care less?

Billy: Boy, I don't think she's thinking about you right now.

Bill: Well, you're probably right.

Billy: Yeah.

Bill: She's been obsessed about...

Billy: She's had a really tough day. Come on.

Lizzie: Can I?

Daisy: Oh, yeah, sure. So... this is hard.

Lizzie: I feel like a pariah.

Daisy: Me, too.

Lizzie: You're not.

Daisy: You're not. This has got to be hard for you, this whole time of year.

Lizzie: Yeah, Sarah...

Daisy: No, now, that was stupid...

Lizzie: No, it's okay. I like to talk about her.

Daisy: Hey, do you ever wonder... I... I mean, do you ever think about that maybe some day having another baby?

Bill: Is, uh, is Lizzie... is she doing that thing where she keeps playing with her earrings?

Billy: Hey, look, she only does that when she's nervous...

Bill: Nervous. I know. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Billy: You know, she’s not unwelcome here, but she kind of thinks that everybody feels she's responsible for what happened to Tammy.

Bill: I thought everyone blamed Alan.

Billy: Alan bounced out of that. He threw all of it at her and then kicked her to the curb.

Bill: Does she look okay?

Billy: I already told you.

Bill: No, I mean... she's not crying or anything, is she?

Billy: Well, she kind of looks like she might be getting to.

Tammy: Why are you out here alone?

Cassie: I just needed some air.

Tammy: You're not surprised to see me.

Cassie: I hoped I would. Where's your hat?

Tammy: Oh, I'm always warm now. See, where I am now, whatever your most favorite weather was, you get that forecast every day.

Cassie: So what's your most favorite weather?

Tammy: Mostly sunny with a 99% chance of happiness.

Cassie: Happiness for the weather?

Tammy: Hey, don't ask me. I'm in your head.

Cassie: Yeah, I know. I wish you weren’t. I wish you were here. (Rain pouring)

Tammy: You've been lying to Josh. You're not okay.

Cassie: I'm better than I was.

Tammy: So are you going to throw me this party every year? Because, you know, it's really depressing.

Cassie: I know, right?

Tammy: Well, you always did try to take care of me. I understand the church, and the grave site, and the dark, mournful dress.

Cassie: I just thought a service would be helpful.

Tammy: For who?

Cassie: For everyone. For everyone who misses you. Okay, yeah, for me.

Tammy: Mom, I never left you.

Cassie: I hate it when people tell me that. I want you to be here with me. I want you to be here with Jonathan and Sarah. I want you teaching classes, and cheering at R.J.'s swim meets.

Tammy: I'd be pretty busy, huh?

Cassie: Shopping with me, and peeling potatoes with Will.

Tammy: Why are Will and I peeling potatoes?

Cassie: I don't know, whenever you come over for dinner, or whatever.

Tammy: Yeah, but aren't you cooking? I mean, why are we peeling potatoes?

Cassie: I just mean... I don't know. I just want you there for the every day things.

Tammy: Mom, I want you to stop wanting that. Let our family take care of you.

Cassie: You are my family!

Tammy: But not all of it. I love that you're married to Josh. Lean on him. He loves that. And you've got R.J., possibly the best hugger in the world. Now Will's back. Stay close to him, Mom. He's like Jonathan... he needs a lot of love. I know you had to give me up, but don't you ever give him up again, okay? Please. That is important. (Rain pouring)

Cassie: I love you. I don't know what I'd do without you.

Tammy: You already knew all this stuff. I've got to go.

Cassie: Please don’t.

Tammy: Mom, I thought we weren't going to do this anymore.

Cassie: Hey, why isn't it 100%?

Tammy: What?

Cassie: Why isn't it mostly sunny with 100% chance of happiness?

Tammy: Because I can't be completely, totally happy until I know that you are. That last one percent depends on you.

Jeffrey: Okay, before you curse me out for being late, remember we're in house of God.

Reva: It's okay. It's okay. I was running late, too.

Jeffrey: What's going on?

Reva: It's Alan.

Jeffrey: He's here?

Reva: Well, I don't know, but...

Jeffrey: Look, just tell me what's going on?

Reva: I think Jonathan is the one that's been stalking him. I have a feeling he's in town. I saw some of Sarah’s things at the Bauer cabin when I was up there and I think he might show up here.

Jeffrey: He's going to come here?

Reva: Well, I distinctly told him not to. But he never does anything I tell him to do.

Jeffrey: He’s kind of like his mother.

Reva: Hey, come on.

Jeffrey: Okay. Where is Alan?

Reva: I don't know. I had him, but I lost him.

Jeffrey: Well, look if Alan and Jonathan are wandering around here and they bump into each other...

Reva: And if Jonathan has the baby with him?

Jeffrey: Then he'll know they're alive.

Reva: I have given up so much to keep them safe. What am I going to do?

Jeffrey: All right, it's going to be okay. You go inside, to the service, and I'll stay out here and I'll keep an eye out.

Reva: What, and stand guard? What's that going to look like?

Jeffrey: It's going to look like...

Reva: You're standing guard. No. You come in there with me, and you let everybody see that you're there. And then you try to slip out...

Jeffrey: That will look even more suspicious.

Reva: Shh! The service is starting.

Jeffrey: No, it's not.

Reva: Come on.

Alan: Cassie?

Cassie: I cannot believe that you would come here.

Alan: Neither can I. I just want to tell you that the phone calls using Tammy’s voice, the newspapers, the harassment has got to stop.

Cassie: Alan, I am grieving for my daughter, today and every other day. If someone is after you, I give them my blessing, but it isn't me. I would not use Tammy that way.

Alan: I would understand if you did. I don't deserve your forgiveness. And if it's any consolation to you, I have lost everything that matters to me.

Cassie: Well, it isn’t.

Alan: After Amanda, my daughter, all I had was Elizabeth and baby Sarah, just for a short time. The things I did for them, I did out of love to protect them. However inadvertently they contributed to Tammy’s loss... death...

Cassie: Why? Why now?

Alan: She didn't deserve it.

Cassie: Well, she didn't deserve it a year ago, but you said nothing then.

Alan: I guess I had to lose everything.

Cassie: Ah, okay. So it's about you.

Alan: Cassie, I.. I don't know what to say and I don't know how to say this, but...

Cassie: How about you stop talking like a politician, and you say it like a man, like a father, like a human being for God sake!

Alan: Like a parent who's lost his children. I've lost every one of them.

Cassie: Yes, you can get them back.

Alan: No, I can’t. I have no more chances. I am finished, but you are not.

Cassie: Oh, okay. Okay. So you want me to feel sorry for you?

Alan: I just want you to know how deeply sorry I am for your loss, and the part that I played contributing to the death of the person who meant more to you than anything in the world.

Cassie: Come inside.

Alan: What?

Cassie: Come inside, and pay your respects to my daughter.

Josh: In peace, let us pray to the Lord. Give courage and faith to those who are bereaved, that they might have the strength to meet the days ahead in the comfort of a reasonable and holy hope, in the joyful expectation of eternal life with those they love. Amen.

Everyone: Amen.

Josh: Cassie?

Cassie: So, um, I've been thinking for the past few days about what I wanted to say here today. And then, it occurred to me this morning, what would Tammy say? And so this is what came out. First, I think she would say, "Go home! What are you all doing here? Go to work, go to school, go skiing! Don't waste one more minute grieving for me. I had it good. It got off to a rough start, but I had two brothers who I love very much. I've had a few dads here and there, and a mother who screwed up a lot but who loved me more than life. I got to be a princess, a scholar, Juliet in the school play. I got married! I had a husband, a baby stepdaughter. I found the kind of break-your-heart, touch-your-soul-against all-odds kind of love that most people never find even in a hundred years. And I found it in only, like, 20. And I had all of you for family and friends. What a lucky girl I was!" So, what a lucky girl I was to be her mom. I had Tammy when I was very young. So, yeah, I couldn't even imagine being a mom. And now I can't even remember who I was before. Without her now, sometimes I'm not sure who I am. But that's because children change who you are. Every child you have changes your life. And makes you love beyond reason, to put someone else ahead of you. And so I'm very grateful for all that Tammy taught me, and for the time that we had together. I just thought it would be more. Tammy was all about forgiveness. She saw the good in people who only showed her bad. And she welcomed them in when others shut them out. And it's a good thing, too, because if Tammy hadn't had that kind of faith, she would have missed out on all of the great times that she had with Jonathan. And on the days when I miss her the most, I take comfort in knowing that she's with him, and with Sarah, and that they're never alone.

Bill: Is that...

Billy: Yes.

Cassie: They'll be together forever, where no one can hurt them. And every day is sunny and happy, totally, completely happy. So thank you all for coming today and for loving my little girl. I know she loved all of you.

Cassie: Where's Will?

Jeffrey: Jonathan? Hey, Will, it's Jeffrey. What are you doing out here?

Will: Did you just call me Jonathan? Because isn't Jonathan dead? I want my mommy.

Jeffrey: Yeah, well, we'll find her in a minute, okay?

Reva: Hey, guys, what's going on?

Will: He called me dead Jonathan.

Jeffrey: Uh, no, Will heard me wrong.

Will: No, I didn’t. Do you think I'm as bad as him?

Reva: Oh, no, honey, no, no. No, that's not true at all.

Will: Then why did he call me that?

Reva: Because you and my son, Jonathan, are a lot alike. You both lost a lot at a very young age. And sometimes, that makes a kid act out, but that doesn't mean he's bad. He wasn't bad, and neither are you.

Will: You know who's bad? Alan.

Reva: No, he's not all bad. You know what? I bet your mommy's looking for you. Let's go inside. (Bells ringing)

Cassie: Hey, sweetie, where were you?

Jeffrey: I found Will in the parking lot. Actually, in the bushes near the parking lot. I think he must have slipped out during the service.

Josh: I didn't even see him leave.

Jeffrey: Josh, he said something about Alan.

Josh: Yeah, he said something to me at the house, too. Do you think he was waiting for Alan, thinking he was going to show up?

Jeffrey: You know, maybe I'm just being a little paranoid, but...

Josh: Yeah, well, that kid makes me a little paranoid, too.

Jeffrey: Well, you know what? It's a hard day for everyone. I know you've been trying to get Will into the Fairmount Academy.

Josh: Yeah, evidently he wasn't troubled enough.

Jeffrey: Yeah, well, um... I made a few calls. He's in.

Josh: Thank you very much. I'll talk to Cassie about it. Will needs this. We all do. (Bells ringing)

Lizzie: Um, I just wanted to say thanks for letting me be here. You're a way better person than I am. I'm just so sorry that we lost our daughters.

Cassie: You're not alone.

Bill: Lizzie?

Cassie: Bill, she's right here.

Lizzie: No, I'm not.

Cassie: Hey, Lizzie... this is your chance to be a better person.

Bill: Can we... can we talk?

Lizzie: What? What are you doing?

Bill: I just... I want to see if this is your mad face...

Lizzie: Don't be mean to me today. You have been a jerk to me. Just about everywhere in this entire town, work days, weekends, when it's just you and me, when other people are around, it doesn't matter. Just please don’t. I can't take anymore today. I know that you can't see, but we are still in a church and that means something. There are angels watching. Tammy is probably watching. And she's gone. And Jonathan’s gone. And my baby is gone! And now our baby... our baby...

Bill: Our baby is a gift that some people don't get. Or they get and lose. Now, I blew it. When you first told me that night, I blew it. And I don't know why. Maybe because it came out of nowhere. Look, I'm not making excuses. I'm not. I mean, only a moron wouldn't be moved by what Cassie was saying and despite what you think, I'm not one. I'm not ready for this. I'm not. But maybe you're right. Maybe that's why this is happening. Maybe someone is trying to tell me that, "Bill, it is time to get your act together!" With a baby in the picture, I just... I want to give us another go. Lizzie, I never meant to hurt you. I didn’t. I know I have, and I know you're scared that I'm going to do it again. But I really, really, really want to make this... I want to make it work. And I hope you feel the same way. I don't believe I'm talking to myself. Great.

Lizzie: No. I'm still here.

Bill: I know there's a lot going on today, okay, and if you need time to think about...

Lizzie: You really want to be with me?

Bill: I really do.

Lizzie: I think we... I think then we should give it a try.

Bill: Hey, I mean we're having a baby. What better reason to give it another shot, right?

Lizzie: Yeah.

Bill: Yeah.

Lizzie: Yeah, yeah, it's worth a shot.

Bill: Is my dad still around here? He would probably love to hear the fact that we patched things up.

Lizzie: Um... yeah, he’s... he's up front.

Bill: You going to be okay?

Lizzie: Yeah.

Bill: Yeah?

Lizzie: Go straight...

Bill: Yeah, yeah, I got it. I got it. Are you still there?

Lizzie: Yeah.

Bill: I'm really happy about this, Lizzie.

Lizzie: Me, too.

(Rain pouring)

Lizzie: Sarah?! (Crying)

Reva: I'm proud of you, Cassie. You were very strong.

Cassie: Oh, please. You've been strong this whole year.

Alan: Cassie, I wanted to thank you...

Josh: Alan, I told you...

Cassie: Josh, Josh...

Alan: I want to thank you, Cassie, for allowing me to stay.

Cassie: I made some peace with him. I have to for the sake of my kids. I cannot forgive him, but I can't go on hating him. I don't want R.J. and Will to see me like that. But it doesn't bother me to see him suffering a little.

Reva: Well, I kind of enjoy that myself. You?

Josh: I think I'll just keep my opinion to myself.

Cassie: He says that someone is still harassing him about Tammy. If not us, then who?

Reva: Well, I mean, you know Alan’s got a list of enemies a mile long. It could be just about anyone. I'm going to have to run, catch up with Jeffrey. Take care.

Josh: Thanks.

Cassie: Is it tomorrow yet?

Josh: Why, what's tomorrow?

Cassie: Not today. I've been dreading this anniversary for so long, I think I'm just going to wake up tomorrow a little lighter. Just a little.

Josh: Yeah. Maybe we'll be able to focus a little bit more on Will now. Jeffrey pulled some strings, and he was able to get him into that special school we talked about. This is a good thing. We'll be able to get Will the help that he needs.

Cassie: I really don't think that this is the way to go.

Josh: We talked about this.

Cassie: Josh, I can't do it. I can't send him away. I promised that I would keep him close and never let him go.

Josh: You promised him that?

Cassie: And Tammy.

Lizzie: Sarah? Sarah? I'm sorry, excuse me. Did you see my little girl? She's one year old. She has dark hair.

Woman: No. You lost your baby?

Lizzie: Yeah. Yeah, I did. Not today. I'm sorry.

Bill: (Laughs)

Next on "Guiding Light"...

Natalia: If you died, I'd have one less thing to worry about.

Gus: Where there is Alan Spaulding, there's trouble.

Lizzie: I saw her at the church. Sarah is still alive.

Bill: I can see!

Dinah: What's the first thing you saw?

Jonathan: Poor blind Bill. Sucks for you, saved me.

Back to The TV MegaSite's Guiding Light Site