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Proofread by Laura

[Last part of the transcript is missing due to news coverage.]

Sandy: Ava, where are you?

Reva: Trick-or-treat?

Sandy: Hey, Reva!

Reva: How are you? So, any news to report?

Sandy: News?

Reva: Yes, news. Like a wedding date that you and Tammy might have set?

Sandy: Not yet. Soon.

Reva: Soon? Soon's good. It would be nice after everything Cassie had to go through, giving her little girl away and all, to have something positive to look forward to. How is Cassie today? Have you seen her?

R.J.: Aunt Reva, look at all the candy I got.

Reva: Oh, you made a killing. I guess I'd better not do that, huh?

Cassie: Better be careful, he's got a look. Come on, let's get inside, sweetie.

Reva: Wow, it looks like the Halloween elves have been busy.

Cassie: Yeah.

Reva: Guess it's good to keep busy.

Cassie: Yes, it is. We are going to be having some of R.J.'S friends over. And I told you I would make candy apples so go wash your hands and so you can help me, okay? Okay.

Reva: You know what? Why don't you let them know that? Really, after everything you've been through with Hope and all.

Cassie: I'm fine, Reva. I'm fine.

Dinah: ( Laughs ) How do you know you have a stalker?

Mallet: You tell me, you've been one.

Dinah: Okay, could you please just go? Just go.

Mallet: You have a probation hearing later on. I want to make sure you'll keep it.

Dinah: I'm going to keep it. Good-bye, get another hobby.

Mallet: Sorry my little feline wonder. I put my neck on the line for you. I'm not taking any chances.

Dinah: You got me a court date!

Mallet: Yeah, instead of a jail cell.

Dinah: What do you want? Do you want a thanks, a handshake, something else?

Mallet: No thank you.

Dinah: Well, good. I'm going to find myself a saucer of milk and get some vodka in it.

Mallet: Not so fast, kitty cat.

Frank: Okay, children, don't tell Watson I'm looking for him, will you? All right, have a good day. Bye. ( Laughs )

Alan: Frank, where's my treat?

Frank: Your treat's at the asylum, Alan. Two pills a day and they're strawberry flavored.

Alan: Strawberry. That's too bad because I like cherry.

Edmund: Hello. I am Dr. Lain from the McCauley Institute. I'm here to collect my patient, Alan Spaulding.

Ava: Are you sure you need me to stay? It's been a really long day.

Jonathan: I need you.

Ava: You know, Marx and Tim are here and Jamie...

Jonathan: It's not about work. Come here. I thought of something that might help you with the whole Sandy divorce thing.

Ava: I'm not ready to get a divorce yet.

Jonathan: Well, good luck trying to force him to love you.

Ava: I didn't say I was going to force him to...

Jonathan: All right, whatever! It's your life. Anyway, there's a guy that comes in here sometimes and he's a lawyer, and I saw him and I thought, hey, he could help you if you decide to divorce Sandy.

Ava: Yeah, thanks. I'll think about it.

Jonathan: Ava, let the guy go. It's the only way we both get what we want.

Sandy: So Halloween was good to you, too, huh?

Tammy: I got some treats and R.J. had a good time.

Sandy: How's your mom holding up?

Tammy: She's acting like she's all right, trying to stay strong for the rest of us, I guess. She had to give up her little girl, Sandy. I mean, she's been through so much, and now this.

Sandy: She's having a tough time. But she still has you.

Tammy: I'm doing what I can, you know? But we all miss Hope. I'm so lucky I have that you.

Sandy: And I'm not going anywhere.

Tammy: I cannot wait to be Mrs. Sandy Foster.

Sandy: Hmm. Soon. Very soon.

Tammy: How about making it sooner? Say tonight?

Jonathan: Listen, Ava, I know that you've heard a lot of bad things about me from, like, everybody, but I'm being straight with you now. Tammy and Sandy do not belong together and it's only a matter of time before they fall apart.

Ava: You don't know that for sure.

Jonathan: Trust me. They're doomed. Can you honestly say that that's not what you want?

Ava: It's not... exactly.

Jonathan: Do you want to be with Sandy?

Ava: I love him and I want him to be happy.

Jonathan: I tell you for a fact he's not going to be happy with Tammy.

Ava: Have you seen the way she looks at him?

Jonathan: She doesn't love him. Not... her heart's not in it and deep down Sandy knows that.

Ava: Well, if that's true then I can't step aside, I have to say something to him. I have to make him see.

Jonathan: No, you can't do that because then he's just going to think you're trying to ruin his life. And that's the same reason I can't tell Tammy that you guys are married.

Ava: Because you don't want to hurt her.

Jonathan: I want her to figure it out for herself. Look, sometimes you've just got to back off and let them come to you. Speak of the devil. This is my friend I was telling you about. Hey, man. Do you have a minute to talk to my friend over here?

Man: Uh... time with a beautiful woman? Uh... yeah.

Jonathan: ( Laughs )

Man: What can I do for you young lady?

Ava: I think I might need to get a divorce. Is that complicated?

Man: Draw up papers, a couple signatures and-- bang-- you're free. So where's the guy who's lucky enough to still be your husband?

Sandy: Get married-- tonight?

Tammy: Why not?

Sandy: Well, it's Halloween for one. And you want a wedding. You want the real deal.

Tammy: We can have that later. Tonight we would just be saying our vows. That's the most important thing. I don't want to wait, Sandy.

Sandy: Don't you want your mom to be there?

Tammy: She can come. I'll tell her. Maybe she even needs this right now.

Sandy: Well, hey, you know, the courthouse, it won't be open much longer.

Tammy: Are you having second thoughts?

Sandy: No. No. Sit, sit. Absolutely no second thoughts here. I just want to do this right.

Tammy: I just want to start a life with you.

Sandy: We have a life together.

Tammy: As husband and wife, though.

Sandy: We have time.

Tammy: I know.

Sandy: Is something wrong, Tammy?

Tammy: No. That's the whole point. Everything's perfect, so why wait?

( Cell phone rings )

Sandy: Oh, excuse me. I should get that. Hello?

Ava: Sandy, it's Ava.

Sandy: I just tried to call you.

Ava: I saw. I need to see you.

Sandy: Have you made a decision?

Ava: Yeah. Can you meet me at Outskirts?

Sandy: Yeah. Be right there.

Tammy: Who was that?

Sandy: That was Wanda. She can't find a document they need overnighted to Bill so...

Tammy: Why did you ask her if she made a decision?

Sandy: Lowell. It's his birthday. She wants to buy him a computer.

Tammy: Oh.

Sandy: I don't know how long I'll be. Do you want know meet you at the Beacon?

Tammy: Yeah.

Sandy: Hey, you know what? Maybe you're right. Maybe we shouldn't wait to get married.

Dinah: Would you get off my tail?

Mallet: Don't leave your tail exposed.

Dinah: I want a drink, to relax.

Mallet: That's a good idea. Go into court smelling like booze. That will put the judge in a good mood.

Dinah: Ever heard of a breath mint? Wait a minute; I already know the answer to that.

Mallet: Ever heard self-control?

Dinah: You must be related to my parents. You're sounding an awful lot like them.

Mallet: Because I'm reasonable, rational, pragmatic?

Dinah: Mallet, it's Halloween? Have you ever had any fun? What is your deal? Okay, you know what? I know answer to that one, too.

Mallet: You don't know anything about me.

Dinah: You know what? Let's keep it that way.

Mallet: Remind me the next time I'm nice to somebody that they're not as crazy as some outhouse rat first.

Dinah: Why are you doing that this?

Mallet: Because in some moment only temporary insanity, I vouched for you backed you up and now I'm going to keep it. We're going to go 20 your house and change clothes.

Dinah: Okay, now I get it. You just want to see me get changed.

Mallet: You're wrong, baby cakes. Man, you are scared.

Dinah: Ooh, excuse me. I'm not scared of anything.

Mallet: You're scared. Your long ride on the Cassie Express is finally over and you don't know what to do with yourself. Well, I can help you with that one.

Dinah: You cannot do this to me.

Mallet: News flash, Marler, I think I just did. After you, pussycat.

Edmund: I am assuming all the paperwork is available on Mr. Spaulding's transfer?

Police officer: Don't know anything about it.

Edmund: Don't tell me this. I need to be back in an hour for a group therapy session.

Police officer: I'll talk to my chief.

Edmund: Is there anyone else I can see then?

Police officer: Nope. And he's out so you have to wait.

Edmund: I don't have time to wait.

Police officer: There's nothing else I can do.

Edmund: Fine. Fine. May I speak with Mr. Spaulding, then?

Police officer: He's right over there.

Alan: Aren't you a little old to be in a trick-or-treat costume?

Edmund: It's not a costume, it's a disguise.

Alan: Why? You're out on bail.

Edmund: The Michelle business didn't go as I planned and I need to keep a low profile.

Alan: But you're still going to help me.

Edmund: If you help me.

Alan: Edmund, I already have.

Edmund: But I need Cassie back in my life and I'm not going to rest until I have her there.

Alan: Wait a minute, what does that have to do with me?

Edmund: I need a favor from you.

Alan: I don't think you're clear on this. I lived up to my end of the bargain, now it is your turn.

Edmund: Just one night, Alan. One night and a few hours to put my plan into motion.

Alan: What a coincidence. That's exactly what I need, too.

Reva: You don't have to do this with me, you know, the whole stiff upper lip thing. You've suffered a big loss. You had to give your little girl away.

Cassie: She's not mine.

Reva: You thought she was and that's huge, Cassie. I know feeling. It's okay to mourn.

Cassie: I'm not going to mourn, Reva, okay? It's Halloween, it's one of my favorite holidays. I'm not going to disappoint R.J., Okay? I'm not going to do that.

Reva: Hi, sweetie.

Tammy: Why don't you let me take R.J.?

Cassie: No.

( Phone rings )

R.J.: I'll get it.

Tammy: His mom says it's okay.

Cassie: I know his mom says he's okay but I promised R.J. He could have his friends here.

Tammy: They're all at Chance's house.

Cassie: I want to do this!

Reva: You know what, Cassie? Tammy has a point. We can watch a movie, pop some corn.

Cassie: No thanks.

R.J.: Mom, can I go to Chance's house?

Cassie: Sweetie, all your friends, they're coming here.

R.J.: But Chance has got a Playstation 2 for his birthday.

Reva: Oh, wow! Playstation 2, Mom!

Cassie: Okay. You can have your friends over here some other time, okay?

R.J.: Okay. Chance, I can come.

Tammy: I'll take him.

Reva: That's great. And then you can and I can pick him up later.

Cassie: Thanks.

Reva: Where'd Sandy go?

Tammy: He had to run to Lewis. He's meeting me later.

Reva: Well you guys have fun later, you little bride-to-be. ( Laughs )

Tammy: I will. Okay, hey, I'll call you later.

Cassie: I love you.

Tammy: I love you, too. Ready to go, R.J.?

R.J.: Yup.

Tammy: All right, come on.

Cassie: Have fun.

Reva: Look out for the goblins. ( Laughs ) Okay. It's just us. You don't have to be tough, you don't to be strong. Cassie, you don't have to be anything.

Cassie: I do, Reva, because if I don’t... ( sobs )

Cassie: Why don't we watch that movie, huh?

Reva: You know, you have a lot of shoulders you can cry on: Jeffrey, Tammy, me, Josh.

Cassie: Yeah, I know.

Reva: Well, then let us help you. I know that emptiness you're feeling inside, Cassie.

Cassie: It's not the same, Reva.

Reva: So how's it different?

Cassie: Because Jonathan was your baby and you knew that it was a possibility that someday he was going to come back into your life.

Reva: Boy, did that day ever come.

Cassie: Hope is not my daughter and she never will be and she will probably never even know who I am.

Reva: Danny and Michelle will make sure she knows about her other mommy. You know that. When she's older...

Cassie: Great. So...

Reva: So, you two will always share a very special bond, Cassie. You know that. Not that it makes it any less painful.

Cassie: You know what, Reva? I'm just going to have to get over it. I'm going to have to just suck it up.

Reva: Why? You loved that little girl and now she's gone. You have a right to be sad, to be angry, to want to hit someone.

Cassie: Okay! I'm sad, I'm angry and I think it's unfair! And I know that little girl's not mine, but I still love her. And Edmund knew that I would.

Reva: Edmund counted on it.

Cassie: It's the cruelest thing that has ever been done to me and if I could wrap my hands around his neck, I'd kill him.

Reva: Yeah? Go for it! Really. Go for it. Here. Pretend it's Edmund.

Edmund: Do you see all we can accomplish when we put our heads together?

Alan: Edmund, this was my idea, I brought it to you.

Edmund: Yes, but I have the access.

Alan: I can find someone else to help me.

Edmund: Why quibble about credit? We'll both achieve our goals.

Alan: Well said.

Dinah: You have no right to do this. This is a false arrest. You're an idiot. Have you forgotten who my father is? When he finds out about this, he's going to put handcuffs on you.

Mallet: I think he'll recommend a promotion.

Dinah: I have had enough. Somebody is going to pay for this. This is ridiculous.

Ava: That was quick.

Sandy: Have you made a decision?

Ava: Um, I know that you don't love me right now the way that I love you...

Sandy: Stop making this harder than it...

Ava: Look, there were a lot of reasons why we got married. But we had something.

Sandy: We did. It was too much too soon.

Ava: Maybe. I don't know. I could make this really hard for you, but I care about you too much. So I'm going to give you what you want.

Sandy: Thank you.

Ava: I just want you to be happy.

Sandy: I am.

Ava: Good.

Sandy: So what do we do next?

Ava: I hired an attorney and I spoke with his secretary and I had her rush the papers over so we can get this over with.

Sandy: Now?

Ava: We don't have anything to fight about, so it's going to be simple.

Sandy: Wow. You arranged everything?

Ava: I told you, I want you to be happy. This is Mr. Russo?

Sandy: Hi.

Russo: Condolences, buddy.

Ava: Are you ready? Let's do this. Let's get a divorce.

Sandy: Yes. Let's get a divorce.

Russo: Let's do it.

(Music) My heart's about to break come on, let's leave this place together hand in hand you are the one for me you are the one for me you are the girl of my dreams baby now you are the one for me come on let's leave this place together hand in hand...

 ( Knock on door )

Tammy: That didn't take very long. Help me get some of these tangles out.

Jonathan: I'd be glad to. You got a comb?

Dinah: You have no right to keep me here, no right.

Mallet: I suspected you might try to run.

Dinah: You are so full of...

Mallet: Shh. Easy. There are trick-or-treaters around here.

Dinah: You are getting off on this.

Mallet: No, I prefer my women rabies free. Oh, look who's still here! Come on, let's go.

Dinah: Mallet... (Laughs) oh, great. Great.

Mallet: I think you two know each other, right? Relax, I won't leave you together long.

Dinah: Mallet, I don't want to be in here! Come on! Mallet! Nice Frankenstein costume.

Mallet: I like yours, too.

Dinah: It comes with claws.

Alan: You know, Edmund told me you'd grown up to be quite a handful.

Dinah: Really, what else did he tell you?

Alan: Oh, he didn't tell me much. We were only cellmates for a short time.

Dinah: Lucky you. I'd be happy if I never see that man's face again.

Alan: Well I don't think you have anything to fear because I think he's headed out of town for good.

Dinah: Good. I'm not afraid of him. He's the one that needs to be afraid of me.

Alan: Remind me never to get on your bad side.

Mallet: Let's go, Marler, come on. The judge will see you now.

Dinah: What are you talking about? I can't go like this.

Mallet: Relax, I've got your clothes in the hallway. You can change in the bathroom.

Dinah: Thank you so much.

Mallet: Mm-hm.

Alan: I don't think you did her justice. I would get rid of Cassie like that.

Edmund: Please, don't even start.

Alan: Your loss. She's a real spit fire.

Edmund: Dinah may be many things. Right now she's in the building, which means I need to make myself scarce.

Alan: What about our plan?

Edmund: You'll get what you want and so will I.

Cassie: I think I do feel better. ( Laughs )

Reva: A little throwing and smashing always worked for me. It must be genetic.

Cassie: It must be.

Reva: You want to do another one?

Cassie: As fun as it was, I don't want all the mess.

Reva: Oh, come on. The next one you can pretend it's Dinah! ( Laughs )

Cassie: I don't think so.

Reva: Why not?

Cassie: Because I don't really blame Dinah. Not that much.

Reva: What that girl did to you is unforgivable.

Cassie: I kind of understand.

Reva: What part of all of this do you understand?

Cassie: Okay, so you think I'm crazy.

Reva: No. No.

Cassie: Dinah was in love with Edmund and he used her.

Reva: What kind of an excuse is that? Love doesn't make everything right, and in fact, sometimes it makes it even worse.

Cassie: You want to throw a pumpkin?

Reva: No because I'd have to put the name of "Reva" on that one.

Cassie: Oh, no, no, uh-uh. This is my pity party, I'm sorry. Who's that?

Cassie: That's Diana. She's probably bringing the kids over for candy. Can you get the door, I'll get some candy.

Reva: Oh, sure. Whoa! What do we have here? A witch!...

Russo: Pretty straightforward, as you can see. Are you sure you don't want to milk him dry?

Ava: No.

Sandy: You know, it's not such a bad thing that he's looking out for you.

Ava: I don't want anything. The divorce is fine the way it is.

Russo: Your loss.

Ava: You should take this.

Sandy: You keep it.

Ava: Maybe Tammy would like it. It was your mother’s.

Russo: Tammy, ooh, la-la. Was she your little side dish du jour?

Sandy: What?!

Ava: She's his fiancé.

Russo: He's already engaged to someone else? Time out. Sweetheart, infidelity equals megabucks in this state. Especially if this kid's family is as rich as you said they were.

Ava: Who are you working for?

Russo: You, Ava. All right, look over the papers again, sign them where I've marked and get them back to my office. I won't need to see you again. Good luck, kids.

Jonathan: Can I come in?

Tammy: Why?

Jonathan: Fine. I'll just stand out here.

Tammy: Sandy's going to be back soon.

Jonathan: Yeah, well the more the merrier. And don't freak out on me. I'll stay on this half of the room. You stay over there and work on that rat's nest.

Tammy: Why are you here?

Jonathan: Well, I was thinking about what you said to me about how we have to learn to live together in this town and, uh, I'm in.

Tammy: Why are you really here?

Jonathan: ( Laughs ) You really don't trust me at all do you?

Tammy: This surprises you?

Jonathan: You better brush that hair before it dries like that.

Tammy: Are you going to tell me?

Jonathan: Yeah. I've changed and to prove it to you, I'm going to throw you and Sandy an engagement party.

Tammy: Leave.

Jonathan: I'm serious.

Tammy: You're crazy!

Jonathan: Yeah. But I have my sentimental side, too.

Tammy: Sandy's not going to allow it.

Jonathan: Tammy, I need to do this.

Tammy: Why?

Jonathan: Well, you've made your decision and I'm not loving it, but you're going to be Mrs. Sandman and I have to learn to live with it.

Tammy: Well, throwing us an engagement party isn't the answer, okay?

Jonathan: It could be.

Tammy: Jonathan, if you're playing with me...

Jonathan: I'm not playing with you. Look. This might be my last chance to see if I made the right decision.

Tammy: I did make the right decision, okay? I don't care if you see it or not.

( Squeals like a cat )

Tammy: You know what? You took what I said about us living together in the same town all wrong, all right?

Jonathan: Did I? You and I are a part of each other's lives. Like it or not, we're going to run into each other. Let me do this. Help me move on.

Sandy: Hey, how'd you pay for this?

Ava: I have two jobs.

Sandy: Well, I can't let you pay for this. I pushed for the divorce.

Ava: So that you could start your life with Tammy.

Sandy: Yes. It's the best thing for the both of us. That's exactly what you said to me when we got married.

Sandy: Sorry. I'm... I'm sorry that it had to end this way. I'm... I'm sorry that it had to end this way.

Ava: So am I. Things end so other things can begin.

Dinah: Okay.

Mallet: Here. Here, here, and here. And that's okay. No need to thank for me more this time, either.

Dinah: Thank you? I want to strangle you.

Mallet: Is that any way to talk to your new best friend?

Dinah: Is that what you're calling yourself these days?

Mallet: Yeah, I'm responsible for you now. Didn't you hear the judge?

Dinah: Why couldn't have you kept your mouth shut?

Mallet: Because if I had, he would have thrown the book at you. Just do what you're supposed to do and we won't have a problem.

Dinah: What I'm supposed to do?

Mallet: Keep your probation appointments, show up on time for community service. What did you think I just meant?

Dinah: I don't know. I think it sounded like you expected something else.

Mallet: ( Laughs ) Something else. Don't flatter yourself, baby.

Dinah: Why else would you want to become my personal watchdog, huh?

Mallet: Novel concept. Hang with me on this one. It's the right thing to do? Ever heard of that one?

Dinah: Impossible. All men are the same. They're all about agendas and ulterior motives.

Mallet: ( Sighs ) Dinah, a lot of people would say that you've got a lot going for you. You know, you got the looks, the smarts, a moderate amount of personality.

Dinah: Oh, thank you.

Mallet: But you have got to start meeting new men. Stop throwing yourself at men that don't deserve you.

Dinah: You know what? You're 100% right.

Mallet: Really?

Dinah: Yeah. No more Edmunds.

Mallet: That's a good start.

Dinah: Uh-huh. In fact, no more men at all. I'm done.

Reva: Your friend said she'd call you.

Cassie: I thought I'd given Michelle everything.

Reva: Oh, sweetie.

Cassie: God, I've just got to stop falling apart like this.

Reva: You know what? Maybe you should talk to someone, like a counselor or someone who's not so emotionally attached.

Cassie: Yeah, I guess it would be good to talk to somebody.

Reva: And I'm always here if you need to talk to me.

Cassie: I know you are. I know you are.

Reva: I can get some numbers from people.

Cassie: I think I know who to call.

Reva: Okay. That's good. I'm glad you're doing this.

Cassie: Would you mind if we skipped the movie? I'm just really tired.

Reva: Of course, sweetie. Of course. But what about R.J.?

Cassie: He's been begging all day he can spend night at Chance's house, so I'll just call and say he can. You're the best. Thank you so much. Thank you so much.

Reva: Get some rest.

Cassie: I will.   It's Cassie. Look, I thought I could deal with losing Hope, and I'm not doing so good and I think that you're the only one who can help me.

Alan: You know, Detective, you've... you've really livened up to this sleepy little town of Springfield.

Mallet: ( Sighs ) Alan, what the hell are you talking about?

Alan: Well, this book. You've really inspired Blake with this heated relationship between you and your ex-wife.

Mallet: Alan, Blake was obviously inspired by her own imagination or her own love life. But you would know more about that with me, wouldn't you? Since she made her way through every man in your own family, including you. Ick.

Alan: Yes, there were some good times, Detective. But if I were you I would send her some flowers. She has made you the hero of Springfield.

Mallet: And I'm very proud.

Alan: Nothing wrong with some female admiration to take your mind off your long lost love.

Mallet: My what?

Alan: My daughter-in-law Harley. You know

[The rest of the show was pre-empted for news coverage.]

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