Guiding Light Transcript Wednesday 7/17/02
From
Suzanne
Proofread By Tanya
Beth: Is it true?
Bill: Maybe you should tell me what happened while I was at the bar getting these.
Beth: When we, or rather you and Lorelei were in Texas, were we so hot we were bound to burn out?
Bill: Hank told you that?
Beth: Was he lying.
Bill: Well, he wasn't telling you the truth.
Beth: Okay, then why don't you tell me the truth, because I would rather hear it from you anyway. Bill, please, please. My whole reason for coming to Texas was so that I could figure out this missing part in my life.
Bill: Right, the Lorelei part, I understand.
Beth: Yes, yes. And I have been retracing her path, trying to jog some memories, but so far nothing. If you could help me, please.
Bill: Look, Lorelei and I, we were friends.
Beth: And that is as far as it went, so you keep saying. But if that's true, why is that you look the way you look every time the subject comes up? And by the way, the riding, the dancing, the skinny dipping, all strike me as pretty intimate for just friends.
Bill: Texas is a friendly place, what can I tell you?
Beth: I don't need protecting.
Bill: I know that's not what you need.
Beth: If we were friends, then start acting like my friend and be straight with me.
Reva: Honey, is there anything we can do for you?
Cassie: I think I need to go to the beach because the kids are there, I have to tell them about Richard. I just don't know how I'm going to walk out the door. I don't want to leave him.
Reva: Well, we'll do it whenever you're ready.
Josh: Yeah, Marah and Shayne are fine watching the kids.
Lillian: Cassie, could I have a word with you in private?
Cassie: It's okay, I don't have any secrets here, Lillian.
Lillian: Well, I just thought you might want to know that Rick Bauer is a match for Richard’s heart.
Reva: Richard's heart is going to Rick? Oh, Cassie.
Josh: Do the Bauer’s know?
Lillian: No, I just got the call confirming the match. And Cassie would you like us, the hospital, to tell the Bauer’s that it's Richard’s heart? You don't have to, if you'd rather not, it's fine.
Cassie: I guess it doesn't matter if they know.
Lillian: Do you want to go in and tell them?
Cassie: No. No, I don't want to tell them.
Lillian: I don't blame you. I understand. What an incredible gift you're giving.
Lillian: Sorry. Rick, I have some news: There is a heart available for transplant.
Rick: What?
Mel: Was it located through the donor network?
Ed: How soon can it be flown in?
Lillian: It's already here.
Mel: Are they sure it's a match?
Lillian: Yes, the lab just confirmed it.
Mel: Oh, thank God. I told you we were going to beat this.
Josh: You're doing a wonderful thing, Cassie.
Cassie: I should... I should go to the kids now.
Reva: Are you sure you're ready for that?
Lillian: Well, Dr. Pierce is in the building, and the rest of the cardiac team is on the way.
Pierce: Hello, Rick. Mel.
Mel: Hello.
Pierce: How goes it?
Mel: Much better since Lillian walked in.
Pierce: I had a feeling you'd say that. So what are you going to be doing for the next three or four hours?
Rick: I think I can make room in my schedule.
Pierce: Got to run a few pre-op tests.
Rick: And then the surgery?
Pierce: Immediately afterwards. You know, we should get started.
Michelle: Okay, see you later.
Rick: All right, it's a date.
Danny: Hang in there, Rick.
Rick: Thanks.
Danny: See you after.
Rick: All right. Hey, Dad. You going to stick around for the surgery?
Ed: I'm not going anywhere.
Mel: We did it, honey. We got our miracle. I love you.
Rick: I love you, too, honey.
Michelle: Lillian?
Lillian: Yeah, sweetie?
Michelle: I wanted to know something, and I’m not sure if you're allowed to tell me. I wanted to know whose heart it is.
Cassie: They look like they're waiting for someone.
Reva: They are-- you.
Cassie: How do I... How do I tell them?
Josh: Back when Reva’s car went off the bridge, Shayne was still an infant, but I had to talk to Marah, I had to tell her that her mother was gone, and she wasn't going to be coming back.
Cassie: How?
Josh: I just told her. And then I held on to her for a very long time. There was nothing more I could do.
Cassie: I mean, I don't know how you did that. I feel like I've lost my whole world.
Reva: But you haven't. Not all of it. And proof of it's sitting right there in the sand, wondering where their mama is.
Cassie: Hey. Hey, guys. You know that I... I love you, all of you very much. And um... Well, there's something I have to tell you.
Tammy: He died, didn't he? Dad, he's dead?
Cassie: How did you know?
Tammy: I just did.
Bill: You still feeling at home?
Beth: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. But there’s... There's actually another reason that I wanted to dance with you.
Bill: Really, what's that?
Beth: Well, I figured that you would have a harder time lying if we were this close. Why are you holding back on me?
Bill: You know, Beth, you have a good life from what I can see. You got Phillip, you got the kids, you got friends, you got stuff to do, isn't that enough for you?
Beth: It will be, just as soon as I fill in these missing blanks about my life as Lorelei.
Bill: Oh, I really wish the part about us would just come to you.
Beth: Well, it hasn't.
Bill: It amazes me that you... You don't remember.
Beth: And you, obviously, haven't forgotten whatever we were to each other.
Bill: No.
Beth: Bill, please, please. If you can tell me something, then please tell me.
Bill: All right. Beth, we were more than friends. We were lovers. Look, Beth, you wanted the truth.
Beth: And I still do. (Clears throat) Tell me everything.
Bill: Well, the story pretty much started right here at the Palamino in what had to be one of the hottest nights of the years. Felt like Texas was on fire. In fact, the AC was on the blink, so I stepped outside to try to cool off, but that's not how things happened.
Lorelei: Mmm... Too hot for whiskey.
Bill: So it wasn't a mirage.
Lorelei: Come again.
Bill: I picked you up hitchhiking-- convertible-- the other day.
Lorelei: Oh, that's right. I thought you looked familiar.
Bill: So do you.
Lorelei: I used that line first.
Bill: No, I’m serious. You look like a woman named Beth.
Lorelei: Well, darling, I can guarantee you that I’m not anyone you've ever met. You like to dance when you're hot?
Bill: Just means that I’m already warmed up. Come on, let's go inside.
Lorelei: What for? We got everything we need right here.
Bill: And I thought Texas was on fire. And I wanted her the minute I touched her. And I knew she felt the same way about me.
Beth: And did we... I mean, you and Lorelei?
Bill: Sleep together that night? No. No, she made me wait.
Beth: Why?
Bill: I guess it's just to drive me crazy, so I’d want it even more.
Beth: So when did you get what you wanted?
Bill: What we wanted. About a week later. But from that first night, I think we spent every minute together, just dancing and swimming, laughing. Just driving me crazy.
Beth: Until?
Bill: Well, one night, we just came off a long ride from the desert, and we were putting the horses back in the stable. And we were about as hot and dusty as two people can be. And that didn't matter a bit. Everything about that night is still so clear. The moonlight slanting through the doorway, the scent from Lorelei’s skin rising up, sweet but sharp. How could you not remember that? It was one of those perfect nights.
Beth: How was it the next morning?
Bill: Well, it's funny you should mention that, because when I woke up she was gone. And I mean really gone, as in left town.
Beth: What?
Bill: Yeah. Not a note or anything. And I looked for her for a couple of days, but I just thought I'd never see her again.
Beth: And were you upset?
Bill: Let me tell you something. One night with a woman like that may be all you can ask for, so I can't complain.
Beth: And then when you came back to Springfield and you saw me, your fling with Lorelei just came rushing back to life.
Bill: Well for me anyway. I mean, how could it not? I mean, you don't just look like her, you are her. And a fling you call it? No, it wasn't a fling.
Beth: Well, that's a good story. Too bad I don't believe it.
Lillian: Well, normally we aren't allowed to say for at least a year who the donor is, but in this case, the widow okayed your family knowing.
Michelle: Because?
Lillian: The heart is Richard Winslow’s.
Danny: Richard?
Lillian: Yeah, it's hard to absorb, isn't it? I mean, one family's worst nightmare is another family's lifesaver.
Michelle: Thank you for telling me, Lillian.
Lillian: You're welcome, but I couldn't have done it if Cassie hadn't okayed it.
Michelle: Richard's heart. Well, I'm going to tell my dad and Rick, because I think they'd want to know.
Danny: Hey, wait a second. Why was it so important for you to know that?
Michelle: Anything that affects Rick’s case is important to me.
Danny: Uh-huh. Is that all? I don't think so.
Michelle: No.
Danny: What? Tell me.
Michelle: This isn't easy, but over the last couple of days, the weaker Rick got, the more determined Mel became to get him through this.
Danny: So she's his wife; she's a doctor.
Michelle: Yeah, that's the point, that's the point. She knew that time was running out. She knew it was now or never for this transplant.
Danny: Mm-hmm.
Michelle: And I got the feeling that Mel would do anything to get Rick through this.
Danny: Well, honey, come on. What are you saying, that Mel pulled the plug on Richard so that Rick could get his heart?
Reva: I guess I’m going to have to get used to seeing them go places without Richard.
Josh: Well, in a way he's with them. And at least he's not suffering anymore.
Reva: Yeah. That pain is all ours now.
Josh: It really is a miracle, isn't it, that he didn't linger? I was worried about that, but I guess God had other plans for him.
Reva: God had nothing to do with it. And it wasn't a miracle.
Josh: What?
Reva: God didn't take Richard’s life. God didn't let him die. I did.
Tammy: It's so quiet here now.
Cassie: You know, we were right in there when Mindy took our picture at the wedding.
Tammy: It seems like a year ago.
Cassie: Do you remember what you talked to Richard about that night, the last time you saw him?
Tammy: My wedding. Said I wanted mine to be just like Aunt Reva’s.
Cassie: What did he say?
Tammy: I should finish high school first.
Cassie: And you also said that you had to find the right guy.
Tammy: Well, yeah. After that I went to get some cake. I wish I had stayed with dad.
Cassie: You really did think of him as your father, didn't you?
Tammy: He was always around just like a real dad would be, so... I thought he'd be at my graduation, my wedding.
Cassie: Me, too. Me, too. You know, I left something upstairs that I need to go get. I'll be right back.
Reva: It started yesterday.
Josh: What are you talking about?
Reva: From the time they brought Richard into the hospital there was always so much going on around him, you know, doctors and nurses and family. Suddenly everything got so quiet. And I found myself alone in his room with him. And he opened his eyes. I think it was the first time since he went into the coma. And he spoke to me.
Josh: Reva, you didn't say anything to me about this.
Reva: Because I couldn’t. I'm having a hard enough time saying it now.
Josh: What did he say?
Reva: "Help me die."
Josh: Oh, God.
Reva: He was in such hideous pain. And I think he knew that he wasn't going to get any better. And he didn't ask out of his own suffering, it was for Cassie. He knew that the longer he lingered on, the more of a toll it was going to take on her.
Josh: He didn't want to be a burden?
Reva: No. He begged me to end it all.
Josh: And what about the burden that that would place on you?
Reva: Well, who else was he going to turn to? Cassie?
Josh: No, I guess not. I mean, she would never be able to forgive herself for something like that. And you said yes.
Reva: No, at first I prayed. It was more like a tirade. I mean, why would you have a man like Richard, a man who is so wonderful and so loving, have to suffer through such hell? And why... why would have me take his life, when it's against everything that I believe in?
Josh: But you did it anyway.
Reva: I wanted a sign before I could go through with it, and I got it. I mean, when I went back into Richard’s room, they put him on a ventilator, and he opened his eyes. I mean, the two or three times that he regained consciousness it was when I was alone with him, so that was a sign. I mean, it could've been a sign right there. And when he looked at me, he had this look like, "What are you waiting for?" He looked and he... I said, "I can’t... I can't do this. I can't do this." And he blinked when I held up this message board, and I got to the word "please." And then another stroke hit, and I have never seen anyone go through such agonizing pain in my life, but he opened his eyes again, and he looked right into mine. And I don't know, I guess something just gave way in me. And I knew that I couldn't see him in that pain anymore, so that's when I turned off the ventilator. First the alarm, and then the power. Richard was so still, but the pain stopped. Everything stopped. And I sat there, and I held his hand, and I sang to him.
Josh: You sang to him.
Reva: Yeah, because it seemed like the best way to stay good- bye. Then I left. No one else knows anything about this, Joshua, because I couldn't trust anyone else with this. Say something.
Josh: I don't know what to say, Reva.
Reva: You could tell me I did the right thing. Please.
Cassie: (Sobbing) Oh, God. Oh, God, Richard. Why did you leave me?
Bill: Wait a minute. First, I tell you we are friends, and you don't buy it. So I tell you the truth that we were lovers, and you still don't buy it. What do you want from me?
Beth: Nothing. Nothing because you're right. I do have a good life, I have a great life. I love Phillip, I love my kids, and you were just a friend.
Bill: Well, you can't know if you don't remember.
Beth: Well, I say there is nothing to remember.
Bill: Oh, we were lovers, Beth.
Beth: Yeah, yeah, then how come you aren't mentioned in Lorelei’s diary?
Bill: There's a diary?
Beth: Yeah, that's right. And there were men, I don't deny that, but there's no mention of you anywhere. And why is that if the two of you were just such a hot item?
Bill: I don't know. Maybe the time we spent together meant a little bit more to her than the stuff she did write about.
Beth: The time that you spent together? She left after one night.
Bill: Look, I... I don't care about some diary. I don't care what's in it, what's not in it. And I don't care if you can explain away everything I say, because this is what's real.
Beth: Don't you ever do that again.
Josh: You took a man's life.
Reva: He begged me to do it.
Josh: So it was out of love.
Reva: Nothing else could've made me do something like that. It wasn't just any man, it was Richard, Cassie’s husband. I had a son with him.
Josh: But still somehow you managed to flip the switch.
Reva: You think I’m a murderer.
Josh: No.
Reva: I am a murderer.
Josh: No, I didn't say that. And you should not use that word.
Reva: What word am I supposed to use?
Josh: I don't know, but don't say that again. Reva, this is something that you're going to have to live with for the rest of your life. In a way, both of us will.
Reva: What would you have done, Josh, if you had been put in the same position?
Josh: Doesn't matter what I would've done.
Reva: I want you to answer me.
Josh: It's not important, Reva. I wouldn't have done it. I couldn't have done it, Reva. I cannot imagine a way that I would justify that action.
Reva: It was just me being me again, right, acting without thinking, just kind of letting my heart lead the way straight into hell, in this case, no matter how much love was behind it.
Josh: Reva, hold on.
Reva: No, you hold on, you just hold on! This wasn't just some whim. He was in so much pain, he was just... So much pain. Even then, I went over and over it in my head. I probably wouldn't have done it, if I hadn't seen that kind of pain he was in. And in that instance I knew that if I didn't fulfill Richard’s wishes, if I didn't do it, then I would be denying him his dignity and peace, so I flipped that switch! And the only reason I'm asking you if you could've done the same thing is because I need to know that I was right, I need you to be on my side.
Josh: I'm on your side. I'm sorry if I sounded like I was judging you, that was not my intent. When I said I couldn't do it, I meant that I couldn't handle it, I couldn't manage it. It doesn't mean I think you were wrong.
Reva: Well, what do you think?
Josh: I think... I think, I know the word I would use to describe you right now.
Reva: What?
Josh: Angel.
Lord here comes the flood we will say good-bye to flesh
and blood and again with Caesar silent and
an then he's still alive it will be those who gave
their island to survive drink up dreamers
you're running dry when the flood calls
you have no home you have no walls
in that thunder crash you're a thousand miles
within a flash don't be afraid to cry and watch
you'll see the actor's gone
there's only you and me
if we break before the dawn they'll use up what we used
to be lord here comes the flood
we will say good-bye to flesh and blood
if again the Caesar’s silent and then he's still alive
it will be those who gave their island to survive
drink up dreamers you're running dry.
Bill: Just for the record, you're the one who came down here looking for the truth.
Beth: Yeah, yeah. And it's too bad that I didn't find it.
Bill: You know what? I was trying to protect you. I thought going into what Lorelei and I had together would be too much for you to handle.
Beth: And what is that supposed to mean?
Bill: Nothing, nothing. But you know what? Now that it's out in the open, I feel so much better.
Beth: Good, I’m glad, good- bye.
Bill: Listen, I want you to spend some time with me, alone, okay? And if you don't feel what we felt together, then I will walk away, and I won't look back.
Beth: I have to go back to Springfield.
Bill: Well, I’ll see you there.
Josh: Reva, I don't think you should tell her.
Reva: Oh, no, I have to be honest with her.
Josh: It's going to hurt her.
Reva: It will hurt her even more if she thinks I’m keeping something about Richard from her again.
Josh: This is very different.
Reva: Yeah, you're right. I think she deserves the right to know how her husband died.
Cassie: I'm so glad you're here.
Mel: How is he?
Ed: He's in serious but stable condition for the time being.
Mel: What's the prognosis?
Ed: We all know it's impossible to tell how a transplant will take in the early stages. You got to worry about rejection, infection.
Michelle: Yeah, but what did Dr. Pierce say, Dad?
Ed: The surgery went as well as could be possibly expected.
Mel: Is that a direct quote?
Ed: Yes. At the moment, there is a new,
strong, healthy heart beating in Rick Bauer’s chest.