General Hospital Transcript Tuesday 9/29/09
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Provided By Suzanne
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Anthony: So, do what do I owe the pleasure of this visit? Now, let me guess-- bad news for me.
Claudia: Hello, old man. I just thought you should be the first to hear about your future grandchild.
Anthony: You managed to get yourself knocked up again? Who'd you have to bribe or threaten to accomplish that?
Claudia: That's funny. I'm not actually pregnant yet, but I will be. And my child is going to inherit the combined Corinthos-Zacchara power and territory.
Anthony: Claudia, no brat of yours is going to take my legacy away from Johnny, ever.
[Spinelli taps glass]
Spinelli: May I have your attention, please? Um, on behalf of my fair Maximista, who may not be my wife today, but will forever be the love of my life...
All: Awww.
Spinelli: We would like to thank you first for your most impressive rendition of foreigner's greatest ballad, thank you.
[Cheers and applause]
Spinelli: But most importantly, for being here on this most special of occasions to celebrate our love for each other.
Maxie: Spinelli and I feel very blessed and grateful to have amazing friends and family.
Mac: You know, all right, I'd like to make a toast.
[All murmuring]
Mac: To the Jackal. Spinelli?
Spinelli: Uh-huh?
[Laughter]
Mac: You have my permission to not marry Maxie ever again. Cheers, huh?
[Cheers and applause]
Coleman: The jukebox is officially open for business. No DiNero is needed tonight, because it is all on the house.
[Cheers and applause]
Spinelli: I want to remind everybody that the karaoke machine still awaits! Oh. [Chuckles] Surely... surely someone else wishes to serenade Maximista and myself? Any--anybody? [Chuckles]
[Music playing, indistinct chatter]
Molly: That is so cool!
Coleman: Sexiest girl in the room.
Kate: Thank you.
Coleman: Hey, what do you say you and I kick this thing off with a little duet, hmm?
Kate: [Laughs] I don't think so.
Coleman: Come on, girl. It'll be fun. If you don't want to sing, I can handle that part. You can just kinda dance around in the background and look hot. What do you say?
Kate: You think I look hot?
Coleman: I think you look smokin' hot.
Kate: I'm fine right here.
Coleman: It's a shame. All that beauty and talent going to waste like that.
Kate: [Laughs]
Sam: So I was thinking, this is pretty much all because of you.
Jason: No, it's not.
Sam: Yeah, it is. Spinelli really wouldn't know anyone in this room if it weren't for you, including Maxie. You're the one who saw past the geeky, sort of nerdy computer guy for hire. It's sweet.
Maxie: [Laughs]
Spinelli: It's a shame our guests aren't more tunefully inclined.
Maxie: I think they just need a little more time, or a few more cocktails. You remember how long it took you to build up the courage to sing to me.
Spinelli: Indeed I do. I was paralyzed by an extreme case of stage fright. But it was you and your love that inspired my inner voice to break through.
Maxie: Well, I think it was worth the wait.
[Cheers and applause]
Mac: You know, it's nice to see you out like this, Alexis. Away from work. Did I mention that you look very pretty tonight?
Alexis: I keep getting better looking the more you drink. I'm just saying you may want to lay off the next gin and tonic. Just pace yourself a little.
Mac: Come on, what are you talking about? It's nice to get out every now and again to cut loose, you know? Let off a little steam, right? How about another drink, everyone?
[Cheers and applause]
Claudia: This child is going to be the final piece in the puzzle for Sonny and me.
Anthony: Isn't that sweet? You're delusional, Claudia. You nurturing a baby, that's a good one.
Claudia: My child is going to have everything that you never gave me. Which just goes to show what a complete monster you are. I mean, what kind of person can have so little feeling for their own children?
Anthony: I love John. And I was smart enough to see you were a lost cause from an early age. A little like a rotten apple. And you did a great job of proving me right, too. So congratulations, Claudia. You are now just as treacherous as your mother.
Claudia: You're the traitor. You left my mother behind and you left me to fend for myself. And I would never do that to my child.
Anthony: Oh, such confidence. How do you even know Sonny wants to have a baby? I mean, with you?
Olivia: What the hell are you still doing here? Connie's going to see you.
Dominic: She doesn't even recognize me. I haven't seen her since I was a kid.
Olivia: You don't know that she doesn't recognize you.
Dominic: She looks a little preoccupied to me.
Kate: No, no! [Laughs]
Dominic: Looks like a match made in cocktail heaven.
Olivia: Would you just get out of here? You're giving me a heart attack pushing your luck like this.
Dominic: Would you relax? Stop worrying about me. Go. Have some fun.
Lulu: I saw you eyeing that karaoke machine.
Ethan: Yeah, right.
Lulu: Yeah. I think you should go sing something.
Ethan: No, remember, I'm not even supposed to be here. So why would I want to get onstage and remind everyone I'm a gate crasher?
Lulu: Well, I mean, you must know some awesome boy band songs, right? [Laughs] Come on, go sing something. I got, let's see, what do I got? I got...Ooh, 20 bucks that says you won't do it.
Ethan: Oh, 20 bucks? Okay, now we're talking.
Lulu: Really?
Ethan: You get that 20 ready.
Lulu: No way!
Coleman: Ladies and gentlemen, and especially all you single ladies out there. It looks like we have our first brave soul getting ready to serenade our happy couple.
[Cheers and applause]
Coleman: [Indistinct] Now without further ado, I'd like to introduce to you tonight the thunda from down unda!
[Cheers and applause]
Ethan: All right, all right, thank you all. Thank you, Coleman. I guess I'm going to dedicate this in honor of the happy couple. Cheers.
["I Need You Tonight" by INXS playing]
Ethan: All you got is this moment the twenty-first century's yesterday you can care all you want, everybody does, yeah, but that's okay, so slide over here and give me a moment, your moves are so raw, I've got to let you know, I've got to let you know, you're one of my kind
[All cheering]
Ethan: I need you tonight 'cause I'm not sleeping, there's something about you, girl that makes me sweat, how do you feel? I'm lonely, what do you think? I can't take it all, whatcha gonna do? I'm gonna live my life, so slide over here and give me a moment, your moves are so raw, I've got to let you know, I've got to let you know, you're one of my kind, so slide over here and give me a moment, your moves are so raw, I've got to let you know, you're one of my kind
[Cheers and applause]
Kristina: That was amazing. Seriously. You're so good. And it wasn't like that cheesy karaoke style. You can really sing.
Ethan: Well, thank you. And I love that song. I mean, it's always been a crowd pleaser, too. Especially when the crowd's a few drinks in, you know what I mean?
[Both chuckle]
Coleman: Whoa, huh? Who knew the kid could sing like that, huh? Jeez. Of course, you haven't heard me do my thing yet, don't forget.
Kate: Oh, I have no doubt that you're an amazing... performer.
Coleman: I might have a few little numbers I can bang out pretty well. Oh, will you excuse me for just a sec? It's okay, I'll probably be right back. Excuse me, young lady. Great number, by the way, man.
Ethan: Oh, thanks.
Coleman: Yeah. [Chuckles] Do you know how old that little girl is? Can you say jailbait?
[Both chuckle]
Kristina: Um, what are you doing here?
Kiefer: Molly told me you were going to be here. You know, I gotta say, I'm not real big on having my girlfriend dance around with other guys at bars.
Kristina: I wouldn't do that. Besides, I know pretty much everyone here anyway.
Kiefer: Yeah, I know, it's kinda cool to walk right into a bar without having to scuffle for my fake I.D. Gotta love receptions, right? You have any drink hook-ups yet?
Patrick: So what do you say we get up on that stage and show this crowd what it's all about?
Robin: Oh, really? I seem to remember you hating being up there before, but now you don't want anybody else to have the spotlight?
Robin: Okay, fine. But you gotta admit you did have a good time, did you not?
Robin: Mm-hmm, we had a blast. But I think I'm okay with letting somebody else have the stage this time. Besides, I have... something else in the works. See?
Patrick: You're still trying to set up Lulu and Matt?
Robin: Yes! We both know that he's a good guy. He's just a little misunderstood. They would be perfect together.
Patrick: Okay, you just-- Robin, you gotta be careful if you're going to set up Matt.
Robin: Oh, really?
Patrick: Yeah.
Robin: Well, I think you are going to help me, because sometimes people need a little bit of a nudge to get the ball rolling, yes?
Anthony: Sonny doesn't want to have another baby with you. I doubt if he was even on board for the first one, if it was even his.
Claudia: Shut up! Shut up! Don't you dare mention my baby, or I swear, I will... I will cut you down in your sleep, old man.
Anthony: Oooh. Looks like a struck a nerve, huh?
Claudia: Don't make the mistake of thinking that my child didn't mean anything to me, or to Sonny. Don't. Our baby, our new baby, is going to have the life that the first one should have had, and we're all going to be a family and there's not a thing you can do about it.
Anthony: And we're all going to live happily ever after, right? What a joke. How long before you figure out that Sonny's been stringing you along, Claudia? If he wants a baby at all, he wants it with the Bensonhurst woman, Olivia.
Kate: Now, what could my cousin be so sour about? Look at those frown lines. A little Botox could do wonders.
Coleman: She looks pretty good to me. What do you say we focus on Kate and Coleman?
Kate: [Laughs]
Kate: I know that guy.
Olivia: So, how are you feeling?
Johnny: Never better.
Olivia: Oh, says the man with the bullet holes in his chest.
Johnny: Het. Well, take it from me; I have got the best nurse in town.
Olivia: Ha ha, is that how you think of me now?
Johnny: Well, so much more.
[Indistinct chatter]
Johnny: Everybody seems to be having a lot of fun, huh?
Kate: [Giggles] Stop it!
Olivia: Some people may be having a little too much fun.
Molly: Hey. You wouldn't want to sing with me, would you?
Morgan: Surely. Let's do it.
Molly: Okay, cool. Let's go. Excuse me, Mr. Coleman, um, can we talk to you for a second?
Coleman: Sure, sweetheart. Oh, let me guess-- root beer floats?
Molly: Mm-mmm.
Coleman: Hey, I'm sorry. Just excuse me one more time. I'll be right back, okay?
Kate: Mm-hmm.
Kate: Oh, I knew it! You are all grown up, but I would recognize you anywhere!
Coleman: Ladies and gentlemen, if I could please have your attention just for one minute. We are all in right now for a very, very special treat. So if I could ask you to kindly take your seats, cozy up. Do whatever you gotta do. All right, then. If everybody could please put their hands together and give up the love for the fabulous M&M, little miss Molly and mojo Morgan!
[Cheers and applause]
[Both vocalizing]
["ABCs" by the Jackson five playing]
Morgan: You went to school to learn, girl
Molly: Things you never, never knew before
Morgan: Like "I" before "e" except after "c"
Molly: And why two plus two makes four
Morgan: Now now now, I'm gonna teach you
Choir: Teach you, teach you
Both: All about love, dear
Choir: All about love
Morgan: Sit yourself down and take a seat, all you gotta do is repeat after me
All: A-b-c, it's easy as 1-2-3, or simple as do re mi a-b-c, 1-2-3, baby, you and me, girl! A-b-c, it's easy as 1-2-3, or simple as do re mi, a-b-c, 1-2-3, baby, you and me, girl, come on, let me love you just a little bit, I'm a going to teach how to sing it out, come on, come on, come on, let me show you what it's all about, reading, writing and arithmetic are the branches of the learning tree
Molly: But, baby, without the roots of love every day, girl
Both: Your education ain't complete t-t-t-teacher's gonna show you
Choir: Show you, show you
Molly: How to get an A
Morgan: How to get an A
Molly: Spell me and you, add the two!
Morgan: Listen to me baby, that's all you gotta do!
Both: A-b-c, it's easy as 1-2-3, or simple as do re mi a-b-c, 1-2-3, baby, you and me!
[Cheers and applause]
Both: Sit down, girl, I think I love you, no! Get up, girl, show me what you can do! Shake it, shake it, baby, shake it, shake it, baby, shake it shake it, baby, huh! 1-2-3, baby, a-b-c, it's easy as 1-2-3, or simple as do re mi a-b-c, 1-2-3, baby, you and me, girl, a-b-c, it's easy as 1-2-3, or simple as do re mi a-b-c, 1-2-3, baby, you and me!
[Cheers and applause]
Sonny: I want to know how soon we can set up the meeting. Yeah, get back to me, Bernie, thank you.
Claudia: Well, now that Bernie's satisfied, maybe we could go upstairs and get to work on each other.
Sonny: You know what, it's an important meeting, and I just don't think we should start something that we can't finish. And I need to be reachable for Bernie, because it's very important.
Claudia: Okay. Should I be offended that you'd rather talk business with Bernie than go upstairs with me?
Sonny: No, no. We talked already about, you know, business before pleasure.
Claudia: Okay. All right. I'm gonna go then. I'm gonna go to Jake's and congratulate Spinelli. And maybe when I get home, we can make some time for each other.
Alexis: You were so good!
Kristina: That was fun!
Sam: Yeah, that was really cool. I didn't know you were such a good singer.
Molly: Oh, thank you.
Alexis: You know what I think is really cool, is all of us together right now. I love seeing all my girls.
Molly: Aw, Mommy.
Jax: I didn't know we had a little pop star in the family. You rock. That was absolutely awesome.
Carly: I'm so proud of you. I'm so bummed that Michael wasn't here to see it. Ooh, and I think your little sister really enjoyed it, too. She just gave me a hard kick.
Morgan: Well, I sang to her, also.
Robin: You were awesome.
Morgan: Thanks.
Robin: Hey, guys. You guys having fun over here? Ooh.
Matt: Yeah. Oh.
Patrick: You know what, I was having a blast until that little m&m group stole our thunder from last time we sang.
Matt: Yeah, they pretty much knocked it out of the park, didn't they?
Maxie: Oh, babe, we have plenty of time to practice for the next time.
Matt: Wow, you two rehearsing a scene. That I want to see.
Robin: No, actually our rehearsals are closed to the public. But actually, we were thinking of having a dinner party soon. An intimate dinner party. We'll play some board games afterwards. I know, we're old, but we would like to see you.
Lulu: Oh, me? That’s -- wow, you know, so it's just us four?
Patrick: Well, if you're worried about Matt here, trust me, I'll keep an eye on him.
Matt: Oh, thank you, thank you.
Robin: Well, we don't actually know when the date is going to be. Soon, but we'll stay in touch with you.
Lulu: Sure. Yeah, that's--okay. I'm gonna go check on my brother.
Matt: Yeah. Could you two be any more obvious? I mean, seriously, that was embarrassing.
Robin: That wasn't obvious. Was that obvious?
Patrick: It was obvious, but I love you for it. And seriously, Lulu, she's a good girl.
Matt: Oh, yeah, that goes without saying, but I don't remember asking--or needing-- your--okay, maybe I do need your help.
Robin: Just a tiny...
Matt: Just a little.
Robin: Where are you going? Wait!
Kate: What on earth is your son doing at this--
Olivia: Shut up, shut up, Connie. I'm serious, right now.
Milo: Uh, hello? Hi. If I could have your attention, please.
Man: Milo!
Milo: I've been asked to introduce the next set of performers, so if you could all please put your hands together for a little supergroup that recently has been put together. They're really good. A little band I like to call Double Trouble.
[Cheers and applause]
["Macho Man" by the Village People playing]
[All cheering]
Mac: Every man wants to be a macho, macho man, to have the kind of body, always in demand
Patrick: Jogging in the mornings, go, man, go, works out in the health spa, muscles glow
Mac: You can best believe that he's a macho man, ready to get down with, anyone he can
Both: Hey! Hey! Hey, hey, hey! Macho, macho man, I've got to be a macho man, macho, macho man, I've got to be a macho!
Mac: Everybody, let's go!
Coleman: Hold on there, Kojak. You know, guys, I really hate to interrupt. But that really wasn't full-on macho. It was kind of semi-macho. So you guys are missing, I think, just a few things, just a few things. The first thing you're missing is a nice set of lamb chops like that, what I'm talking about right there. Come on.
[Crowd cheering]
Coleman: The second thing... Oh, yeah, look at that. Is Coleman's kittens. Come on up, pussycats.
[All cheering]
Coleman: Give it up for the pussycats. All right. Let's do it, girls. Uno, dos, tres, quatro. Every man ought to be a macho, macho man, to live a life of freedom, machos, make a stand, have their own lifestyle and ideals, possess the strength and confidence, life's a steal, you can best believe that he's a macho man, and you're a sexy woman, in the palm of macho's hand,
All: Hey! Hey! Hey, hey, hey! Macho, macho man, I've got to be a macho man, macho, macho man, I've got to be a macho!
Coleman: Come alive, you girls of mine!
All: Macho, macho man, I've got to be a macho man, macho, macho man
Coleman: I'm not messing around. Here we go. I've got to be a macho, macho, macho man
Spinelli: Macho!
All: I've got to be a macho man, macho, macho, man, I've got to be a macho, macho, macho, man, I've got to be a macho man, macho, macho man, I've got to be a macho, macho, macho, man, I've got to be a macho man, macho, macho man
Kate: Now why haven't I ever seen all of this before, hmm? You can sing, you can dance. And you were downright sexy up there.
Coleman: I'm blessed.
Kate: [Chuckles] You know what else? There's no hidden agenda. And I really... really like that.
Alexis: Go, go, go, before we're both talking to Children Services.
Olivia: Okay, it is official. My cousin is wicked hammered.
Johnny: Ah, you know, it looks like she could stand to let loose a little bit, have some fun. It could be good for her.
Olivia: She's going to be absolutely mortified when I tell her about this in the morning.
Johnny: Well, hey, if she's getting that kind of reaction out of Coleman, I wonder what I could get out of you if I sing karaoke at Jake's?
Olivia: Maybe we'll have to find out someday.
Lulu: Looks like Kate's gettin' it done tonight.
Maxie: Do you think that we should break that up? Because if anyone in the fashion world saw that Kate Howard was making out with Coleman, the bartender at Jake's? Mmm.
Lulu: Yeah, well, hey, you know, maybe we shouldn't judge. She's having fun, and, you know, I don't know, I guess we should just let her do whatever-- whomever she wants.
Coleman: All right, so what do you say I take you upstairs for a little tour of the facilities?
Kate: [Laughs]
Coleman: Hmm?
Kate: Oh, I'm tempted. There's just-- just a little thing you have to do.
Coleman: What?
Kate: Just one little thing.
Coleman: Huh?
Kate: Okay, one little thing. Whoa! Stop it!
Coleman: What are you doing? Why are you leaving? Call--what?
Alexis: You define macho.
Coleman: [Chuckles]
Ethan: Might I have a word with the Lord of the manner?
Nikolas: God, what do you want, Ethan?
Ethan: I want some answers. About Luke.
Nikolas: Well, why don't you come back when you're not hammered, because I don't have patience for you tonight.
Ethan: I'm worried about him, about Luke. Now I know everyone think he's just taken off, but I've had a hunch since the beginning that he's in real trouble. And that leads me to believe that your family, specifically that wicked witch Helena, could be involved.
Nikolas: Honestly, Ethan, I haven't seen Helena, or Luke, for that matter, for months. But may I suggest searching the Acapulco bar scene, the floors, specifically.
Ethan: Look, my father warned me about you Cassadines, all right? So I will ask you again. What do you know about Luke's disappearance?
Sam: Well, I guess it would be bad manners to leave this here, even though I didn't mean to catch it.
Jason: Thank you for... being my date.
Sam: Um, we better go?
Jason: I want you to come home with me tonight.
Mac: Hey, Spinelli, Spinelli. You know, I think I'm really starting to appreciate you. And I'll appreciate you a lot longer as long you keep Maxie happy and unmarried.
Spinelli: All right--oh!
Maxie: [Laughs]
Mac: I love you, sweetheart.
Maxie: I love you, too, Mac. Why don't you go home and get some sleep and drink some water or something?
Patrick: Yeah, listen, Robin's driving, so we'll--
Maxie: You're in charge.
Robin: Yeah. I'm so happy for you. Everything turned out exactly the way you wanted it to, right?
Maxie: Thank you.
Robin: Okay. I'm gonna make sure party boy gets home.
[Laughter]
Robin: Come on, let's go.
Patrick: Come on, macho man, let's do it.
Robin: Good night.
[All talking at once]
Carly: Oh, you guys make such a wonderful couple. And if you want to get married, do it if you feel like doing it. No pressure.
Spinelli: Thank you.
Jax: Great night. Bye.
Carly: Good night, thank you.
Kiefer: Hey, my car's right out front. Why don't you ask your mom if I can give you a ride home?
Kristina: I don't think I can. I'm supposed to take a cab with my mom. Is it okay if I call you later?
Kiefer: Yeah, sure. Make sure you use that phone I gave you, okay?
Kristina: I will. It was sweet of you to stop by.
Kiefer: [Chuckles]
Kristina: I'm gonna go get some cake for my dad.
Kiefer: Okay.
Johnny: Hey. Congratulations, you two. Excellent night.
Maxie: Thank you. Um, where is your date?
Johnny: Well, her cousin got a little blasted, and so Olivia is baby-sitting and taking her home, I think before captain moustache does.
Maxie: Oh, that's good.
Johnny: Yeah, right. Anyway. Congratulations. Have a great night. I'm happy for you.
Maxie: Thank you.
Dominic: Hey.
Lulu: Hey.
Dominic: Do you want hit another bar, keep the party going?
Lulu: I don't know. I'll take a rain check, though.
Dominic: Okay. I'll hold you to it.
Lulu: I'm sure you will. Bye.
Dominic: Bye.
Lulu: Bye, I love you, guys, it was beautiful.
Maxie: Thank you.
Sam: Okay, wait a minute. I am not a big fan of weddings, but unweddings? This is a whole different story. Thank you, guys, for being an inspiration. Like, are you serious?
[Laughter]
Jason: Congratulations, I hope you guys are happy.
Maxie: Thank you, Jason. You know, you turned out to be not such a bad friend.
Sam: Oh, yeah, well, he has his moments.
Spinelli: Words truly can't express my gratitude to my... truest and oldest friend.
Jason: Don't hug me... again! Save them for her.
Spinelli: Yes, sir.
Maxie: Jason! Oh!
Sam: That's sweet. All right. Luck.
Maxie: Luck!
Sam: Luck!
[Laughter]
Spinelli: Come here.
Spinelli: In my life, there's been heartache and pain, I don't know if I can face it again, but I can't stop now, I've traveled so far, to change this lonely life, I want to know what love is, I want you to show me
["Just You and Me" by Rie Sinclair playing]
Rie Sinclair: Do I need to be invisible to just survive? Or am I foolishly wasting my time? Try so hard to quiet my expensive dreams, before they take me out, and leave me wondering, well, baby, it's just you and me, we got a thing they can't shake, maybe it's a little hard sometimes to take, but I'll tell you something, it's a life worth living, just so you know, I wouldn't give it up, no
[Song continues]
[Telephone rings]
Ethan: "Come quick to cas."
Nikolas: Problem?
Ethan: Might be.
Nikolas: Ah. Well, then I suggest you find a way to solve it rather than showing up here at my home, drunk, making ridiculous accusations.
Ethan: Well, no need to get all high and mighty, mate. I know just what you are. A Cassadine. And you're just as crazy as the rest of your family. [Chuckles]
Sonny: [Speaking Spanish] Gracias. Adios.
Mike: Hey.
Sonny: Hey.
Mike: You know, every time I hear your Spanish, it reminds me of your mother.
Sonny: She wouldn't have approved of what I was talking about.
Mike: Well, you know, I had this feeling that something's been going on. I mean, I haven't seen you in a couple of weeks. But that's not abnormal. So tell me, tell me, are you hiding out or what?
Sonny: What would I be hiding?
Mike: That's what I was hoping you'd tell me.
Sonny: Okay. [Sighs] I agreed to do something that I'm not comfortable with.
Mike: Okay.
Sonny: As a matter of fact, I'm not comfortable with any of it, but I feel obligated to go through with it.
Mike: All right, so... Are you going to tell me what it is?
Sonny: Claudia wants to have another baby. And I agreed to try. And I wish to hell I hadn't.
Mike: That seems pretty simple to me. I mean, if you don't want another kid with Claudia, all you gotta do is tell her.
Sonny: That's easier said than done, mike. Claudia wants another baby. She has every right. And I'm feeling like it's on me to give her a baby, 'cause it was... my daughter who killed her son.
Olivia: I'll explain everything to you tomorrow when you're clean and sober. Let me just get you home right now--
Kate: No, Olivia, no, I am not going anywhere until you look me in the eye and you admit that I am right. That Dominic is really Dante. And if he is here under an assumed name, that could only mean one thing.
Olivia: It's none of your damn business what my son is doing!
Kate: Okay, so I'm right. You admit it. That Dominic is really Dante, Sonny's child!
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