General Hospital Transcript Tuesday 7/10/07

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[Guitar plays]

Eli: Hello. Well, if you're here for the music, you're welcome to stay. If not, shut the door on the way out, would you? Janelle and I would like a little privacy.

Patrick: Your test results are in. If I don't operate now, there's a good chance you could stroke out.

Eli: Save your breath, Doc. There's not going to be an operation.

Patrick: If I don't, you could die.

Eli: Look, people are paying to see me at this benefit, not some look-alike. Why don't you tell the good doctor there's no substitute for the real thing?

Epiphany: What do you think you're doing?

Elizabeth: I'm going to the ICU to change Mr. Sanchez's dressing.

Epiphany: Oh, no, you're not. The only thing you're doing is changing out of those scrubs. You're supposed to be on leave. Besides, you're not going to do me or the patients any good if you're distracted.

Elizabeth: Please, Epiphany. Yes, I was nervous dropping the boys off in daycare today, but I can't keep them locked in the house indefinitely. The kidnapping is over. We need to get back to our normal routines.

Epiphany: You know, that sounds like an excellent idea, provided you can stick to it.

Lainey: Welcome back. Huh. How are you?

Elizabeth: I'm busy. And so if you don't need anything, I need to get back to work.

Lainey: I'm sorry, did I say something?

Elizabeth: Yeah, you suspected me of hurting my son.

[Sam pants]

[Knock on door]

Sam: Just a second.

Maxie: Hi.

Sam: Hey, Maxie. Uh -- what's all that?

Maxie: Some clothes from the boutique.

Sam: I didn't order anything.

Maxie: I know, but the stylist from "Everyday Heroes" sent over for some dresses. Wait until you see the red Badgley Mischka.

Sam: I'm sorry, can you just ask them to take it back?

Maxie: Why?

Sam: I'm not going to need them. I'm quitting "Everyday Heroes."

Maxie: Are you insane? That show is the best thing that's ever happened to you.

Officer: Take a seat and place your hands in front of you on the table. Your visitor will be in shortly.

Jason: Is it my lawyer?

Officer: No, your wife.

Carly: Jason. Hi!

Officer: Ma'am, you need to stay on this side of the table.

Carly: I miss my husband. I can't kiss him hello?

Eli: So the doc wants to operate on me before the pediatric AIDS benefit.

[Janelle sighs]

Janelle: I stood in line two days to get these tickets. Eli has to be there.

Patrick: If Eli doesn't have the surgery, he'll be dead before he ever steps foot on stage.

Eli: The doctor also wants to put a stand-in in.

Janelle: I didn't pay $600 to have some guy lip-synch Eli's songs.

Patrick: Okay, first of all, my father would not be lip-synching --

[Eli laughs]

Patrick: And if he were, it would still be a better show than watching Mr. Love here have a stroke on stage. Or would watching him die be worth your 600 bucks?

Robin: You'll have to excuse Dr. Drake. Sometimes he can be very passionate about his patients' well-being.

Eli: Yeah, you should chill out, mate. You're going to be the one that has the stroke.

Mike: Oh, hey, honey. What -- what can I get you?

Lulu: An application. I know that you do not owe me anything, especially after the way I flaked last summer, but I really, really need a job. Correction, the Quartermaines are really pushing me to get a job -- not that the Quartermaines are my family. I mean, the only person I'm related to is Tracy, and that's by marriage. And besides, Tracy is in Shadybrook for the foreseeable future. So with her gone, and Dillon taking off to follow his dreams, I'm in the house alone, and that's the last place I want to be.

Mike: Whoa, whoa -- wait. About the job -- I mean, if you want to wait tables, you're going to have to do a lot better than you did last summer.

Lulu: Last summer, I -- I was very distracted, but that is -- that is all over now. I promise, I will be the best waitress this place has ever seen.

Mike: But you have to work nights for at least a few weeks.

Lulu: That's -- that's fine. It's not like I have anything better to do.

Mike: In that case, you can start tomorrow.

Lulu: Oh, thank you so much. I promise you, you will not regret this.

[Lulu sighs]

Logan: Cancel anything you have planned for tomorrow evening. I'm going to take you out.

Lainey: It's standard procedure in kidnapping cases to screen the parents of a missing child. And given the fact that Jake is only a few weeks old, I had to explore the possibility of postpartum depression.

Elizabeth: Oh.

Lainey: I mean, it was the only way to effectively rule you out as a suspect.

Elizabeth: I understand. You had a job to do. I just -- I think it'll be best if we have as little interaction as possible. And if I run into you, I will treat you with professional courtesy.

Robin: Elizabeth, welcome back. How is Jake?

Elizabeth: He's fine.

Patrick: What's wrong with Elizabeth?

Epiphany: All I know is Elizabeth is here to work, and maybe you want to do the same.

Patrick: What's up with everybody today?

Lainey: Elizabeth is definitely angry at someone. I'm just not sure it's me.

Officer: Stay in your chairs and keep your hands where I can see them at all times. I'll be back in a few minutes to check on you.

Jason: Sit down. Sit down, Carly. If you get up, they're going to throw you out of here.

Carly: You could at least act happy to see me.

Jason: Well, I am. But my wife?

Carly: Don't tell me you expected Brenda to start walking through --

Jason: Brenda's not my wife any more than you are.

Carly: Well, she used to be, and you still have the marriage certificate to prove it. Although, I don't understand why.

[Jason sighs]

Jason: What are you doing here?

Carly: I miss you, and no one will tell me anything about your case. I know that Diane is scrambling to come up with some kind of a defense. Ric is acting like he already has you convicted, and you should hear the things he is saying about you, Jason.

Jason: Why are you going around Ric?

Carly: Someone has to help you. It's not like you can count on your so-called girlfriend.

Maxie: Okay, obviously, it's not up to me whether or not you stay on "Everyday Heroes." I'm not your agent or your manager or anything, but if I were, I would want to know why you're even considering giving up the opportunity of a lifetime.

Sam: When something seems too good to be true, Maxie, it usually is.

Maxie: Sam, I get that there are probably hidden drawbacks to a career in television, but isn't it worth it? Your picture's on every bus from here to Manhattan, and -- I know this sounds shallow, but do you know what I would give to be in your position? To have people falling all over themselves to make me a star?

Sam: That's the thing. Amelia didn't want to make me a star, she wanted revenge. This woman has been working me from day one. She's been trying to dig up every mistake I've ever made just to throw in my face. At least she wasn't pretending to love me.

Maxie: Where did that come from?

Sam: Maxie, Jason's been lying to me for months.

[Music plays]

Lulu: I'm sorry. I'm -- I'm -- I'm working tomorrow night.

Logan: When did you get a job?

Mike: Oh, about a minute before you walked in the door.

Logan: You're working --

Lulu: Thank you.

Logan: You're working here?

Lulu: Don't be so surprised.

Logan: I don't get it. Why do you need to wait tables?

Lulu: What is that supposed to mean?

Logan: Lulu, I've seen that country club you call a house, all right? It's not like you need money.

Lulu: So is that why you're asking me out? Because you think I'm some spoiled rich girl?

Logan: No offense, aren't you?

Lulu: Huh -- wow, sorry to burst your bubble, but my stepmother's family is the one with the money, not mine, so that makes me the same as you.

Logan: Not anymore. All of Sonny's employees are well paid, which is how I'll be taking you to Catacomb Club tomorrow night. It's 50 bucks a head, but I think you're worth it.

Lulu: Like I said, I have to work.

Logan: Can you trade shifts?

Lulu: It's my first night.

Logan: How about I get someone to cover for you? Hey -- um -- Georgie, if I paid you 100 bucks, would you be willing to pick up her shift so I can take her out tomorrow night?

Singer: I won't let you fall again

Ric: Come in.

Coop: You wanted to see me?

Ric: Ah, yes, Barrett. Please, come in. Have a seat. So, have you given any more thought to my offer?

Coop: Yeah, I've -- I'm honored that you would consider me, but I don't think I'm qualified to be -- act as your liaison. I mean, I've only been in the academy but a few months.

Ric: Yes, and in that short time, you've proven to be one of the best cadets that we've ever had enrolled.

Coop: I appreciate that, Sir, but I still think you ought to pick a more experienced officer.

Ric: Well, that would defeat the purpose. Look, it's no secret that the PCPD is riddled with corruption. Half the cops on the force are supplementing their income by providing Sonny Corinthos with information. Since my relationship with commissioner Scorpio is neither synergistic nor cooperative, I need somebody on the inside of our department who I can rely on. That would be you, Mr. Barrett. So I'm appointing you to this position, if that's okay with you.

Coop: Yes, Sir.

Ric: Good. You start tomorrow night. We received word that Sonny may be landing a shipment. Now, Mac's going to put together a team to stake out the waterfront. I want you there as my representative.

Lainey: Do you have a minute?

Elizabeth: Not really. I'm going to check on my boys in daycare.

Lainey: I would appreciate it if you would at least hear me out. Thank you. Despite what you may think of me, I consider you a friend, Elizabeth.

Elizabeth: Well, you definitely weren't acting that way when Jake was missing.

Lainey: I was trying to help. Postpartum depression can be a debilitating condition, and if you were suffering from it, and you had jeopardized Jake's safety, I wanted to intervene before any permanent harm was done. And considering how upset you were, I think I was understandably concerned.

Elizabeth: I was a wreck because my son had just been kidnapped. I would think that you could see that. A friend would know that I could never hurt either one of my children under any circumstance. A friend would be there to support me, not interrogate me.

Lainey: I understand, and I'm sorry if you felt that way. It was never my intention. You know, this might be kind of awkward, and I just have to say -- I don't -- I just get the feeling that you might be disappointed in someone else, too. Maybe somebody that it's too hard to be angry with? Like Lucky?

Sam: I got into the habit of making excuses for Jason, like when he'd shut down on me or refused to discuss something. I thought to myself, that's just who he is, and I'm okay with it as long as he's being honest. Even when things were strained, or -- or distant between us, I still felt like I could trust him. And it turns out, I've been lying to myself this whole time.

Maxie: I'm really sorry. There's nothing worse than putting yourself on the line or giving everything you have just to find the person you love doesn't love you back.

Sam: I don't know -- I just don't understand how after everything -- everything Jason and I have been through, how could he -- he, out of all people, lie to me. It's like he has completely given up on us.

Maxie: And you were mad enough to do something dumb?

Sam: What makes you say that?

Maxie: Because that's what I would do. When I get hurt, I try and get even. But, Sam, the problem with plans like that is they usually blow up in your face.

Sam: The problem is, I don't think Jason and I can ever come back from what's happened.

[Knock on door]

Sam: Excuse me.

[Sam sighs]

Amelia: We need to talk.

Sam: I have nothing to say to you.

Amelia: You can either talk to me or to the network attorneys. Your choice. You might want to ask your guest to come back a little later, unless you want her to hear all the gory details.

Maxie: Actually, I was just leaving. Bye.

Sam: Bye. Thank you. What do you want?

Amelia: You weren't at the studio this morning.

Sam: Okay, then you can consider this my formal resignation. I'm finished with "Everyday Heroes," and I am beyond finished with you.

Patrick: Hey.

Noah: Hey. Do me a favor. I need a second opinion on --

Patrick: Yeah, I -- I need to talk to you first. It's about Eli love.

Noah: Well, I saw the results. I mean, the guy needs his surgery as soon as possible, and I should be the attending --

Patrick: That's not --

Noah: But if you want me to scrub in, I will.

Patrick: That's not exactly what I want to talk about here.

Noah: Well, if you're still pushing for me to impersonate this guy, forget it.

Patrick: Dad, it's a fundraiser for pediatric AIDS research. How could you say no to that?

Noah: I'm a doctor. I have no business getting up on stage imitating a singer --

Patrick: It's not like you're going to be alone. There's going to be a band, backup singers. After a few rehearsals, nobody's going to know the difference.

Noah: Right, until they turn the microphone on. You've heard me, Patrick. I can't sing. I couldn't carry a tune if it had handles.

Patrick: You just have to get up on stage and fake it.

Noah: That's real easy for you to say.

Patrick: Come on. You know how many people would die to have a chance like this?

Noah: Yeah, well, not me.

Patrick: Don't tell me you've never fantasized about being a rock star.

Lulu: Ha. I am not going out with Logan tomorrow or any other night, so you definitely won't need to cover my shift.

Georgie: Shift? Lulu, when did you start working here again?

Lulu: Mike gave me my job back for the summer. I don't actually start until tomorrow.

Georgie: That's great.

Logan: Yeah, unless you trade with her. 100 bucks, how about it?

Lulu: Georgie says no, and so do I. What is it going to take to get you to understand that?

Maxie: Excuse me. Do you think you could yell at this loser someplace else? You're bothering the customers.

Georgie: Maxie, you don't care about customers.

Mike: Hey, hey, hey -- but I do. Lower your voice, or leave.

Logan: Hmm.

Lulu: There's nothing left to say. I already told Logan I can't go out with him.

Logan: Your loss. Hmm.

Georgie: Lulu, if you want to go out with him tomorrow night, it's really fine. I don't mind covering your shift.

Maxie: Georgie, why do you keep letting this lying slut walk all over you?

Lucky: Hey.

Elizabeth: Why aren't you at work?

Lucky: I just stopped by to check on Cameron and Jake. It's just going to be a while before I'm comfortable, you know, letting them out of my sight for more than a few minutes.

Elizabeth: I know. I've already been down there three times. I guess we're pretty paranoid.

Robin: With good reason.

Elizabeth: But he's safe. That's all that matters.

Robin: My Uncle Mac told me that the kidnapper was a woman that lost her own baby in a house fire.

Elizabeth: Yeah, Maureen Harper. She was a guest on "Everyday Heroes."

Robin: You must have been so relieved when Jason found him when he did.

Elizabeth: Yeah.

Lucky: Actually, Sam's producer, Amelia Joffe, found Jake. She was doing a follow-up on Miss Harper, and she heard a baby crying in the background.

Robin: Then why is Jason the one locked up in Pentonville?

Lucky: Jason jumped bail.

Robin: And you turned him in.

Lucky: Oh -- and you obviously have a problem with that.

Robin: Well, Jason did save your child, and you repay him by arresting him? I thought I knew you better than that, Lucky.

Sam: You can take me to court. Go ahead, expose every last secret about my past -- the money I stole, the men I scammed from. But I don't care, as long as you are not going to blackmail me anymore. I am done.

Amelia: Once the press gets ahold of this, your television career is over.

Sam: So? I don't care about a few headlines. It'll be a scandal for a minute, okay? Maybe a second. But before long, a bigger star is going to come along, and they're going to have an affair, or -- or go to rehab, and I will be forgotten. Most importantly, I will be free! So do your best. I really don't care anymore.

Amelia: You might want to rethink that. If I tell your deepest, darkest secrets, you could be charged as an accessory to Jake Spencer's kidnapping. Or at the very least, the world, including your mother and adoring little sisters, will know that you stood by and watched a deranged woman steal an innocent child. Now, that's what I call a scandal.

Carly: I can't stand the thought of you being in here one more night. We've got to figure out a way to get you out of here.

Jason: No, no, no, no. You promised me.

Carly: I promised I would stay out of trouble. I never said I wouldn't help you. And I haven't come up with a plan yet, but I'm working --

Jason: There's not going to be any plans, Carly.

Carly: Listen to me -- okay, you're not going to be happy about this, but I do think Jerry could prove to be very useful.

Jason: Jerry? What do you mean, Jerry? I told you to stay away from Jerry. If he gets near you and the kids again, you need to call Sonny and take care of this once and for all.

Carly: You need to stop worrying about me and start worrying about yourself. Now, look, when I stopped by the penthouse to get the marriage certificate, Sam barely let me in the door. She was acting like she owned the place, and I know damn well she hasn't paid one cent in the two years plus you guys have been together.

Jason: Carly, come on --

Carly: No, listen to me. She's made no effort to get you out of here. How many times has she come to visit since you got charged with murder?

Jason: I'm not supposed to have visitors. They let you in because you said you were my wife.

Carly: Sam couldn't have thought about that? No, she's sitting at your house spending your money.

Jason: Stop. I appreciate what you're trying to do, okay, but you need to leave Sam alone.

Carly: I am worried about you, and I am trying to help you.

Jason: Okay, you can help me by staying away from Sam.

Maxie: How can you stand to look at Lulu, much less do her any favors?

Lulu: Because your sister is a very generous person -- a concept you're obviously not familiar with.

Maxie: Is that why you lied to Dillon and tricked him into sleeping with you and broke my sister's heart, because you're so generous?

Lulu: This has nothing to do with Georgie, and you know it.

Georgie: Maxie, Lulu's right. You're just looking for an excuse to fight with her, and I'm not going to be your excuse. Stop it.

Maxie: I don't need an excuse.

[Lulu laughs]

Georgie: I am -- I'm sorry. Maxie -- she can be --

Lulu: A hypocritical bitch, but she is right about one thing. You do have every reason to hate me.

Georgie: Lulu, it won't change anything. Dillon's moving on with his life, and I'm trying to do the same. Which is why I want to talk to you about that extra $100 that Logan offered. Mac finally agreed to let me spend my junior year abroad. The -- the only catch is, I have to pay for half. So if you change your mind about Logan, I'm definitely here.

Ric: We're moving forward with the Dunbar case. I've subpoenaed all parties --

Mayor Floyd: That's not the case I'm interested in. Where are we with Jason Morgan?

Ric: Oh. Well, his attorney is pushing for an early trial date, which means she's going to be far less prepared. And we have the recording of alcazar saying Jason's name just before he shot him, so I think we're going to get a conviction.

Mayor Floyd: What about Corinthos?

Ric: Oh, Sonny can't run his business on his own. He's become far too dependent on Jason.

Mayor Floyd: And I assume you have a plan to capitalize on that.

Ric: Yes -- Sonny is planning on landing a shipment tomorrow night, and I have my people in place to intercept.

Mayor Floyd: Hmm. Somehow I don't think Corinthos will be there to personally supervise.

Ric: Everybody who is on the scene, Mayor, is going to be arrested and charged. I don't think it's going to be too hard to find one or two people who are willing to cut a deal. And even if we can't do that, I have a contingency plan. Somebody on the inside -- a very reliable source inside Sonny's organization.

Mayor Floyd: How reliable?

Ric: It's only a matter of time before I have everything I need to put my brother in a jail cell right next to Jason Morgan.

Officer: Your lawyer must have pulled a few strings, because the judge has granted you a phone call. You got two minutes, then back to your cell.

Jason: Hey, Sonny, it's me. No, no, no. Everything's -- everything's, you know, okay. I just need you to talk to Carly for me. She's been hanging around Jerry thinking somehow that's going to help her find Jax. No -- no, I told her to stay away from Jerry, too, but once Carly gets an idea in her head, you know how she is. I'm stuck in here. I can't do anything about it. Okay. Sounds good. Thanks.

Lucky: I didn't know you and Jason were still close.

Robin: It's not about being close to Jason. Throwing a man in jail after he saved your kidnapped child is just wrong. Not to mention, unfair.

Lucky: Jason could have passed that information on to the cops and let us do our job.

Robin: Right -- you could have done the same thing, but instead, you had to be the one to arrest him.

Lucky: If I hadn't arrested Jason for jumping bail, somebody else would have.

Robin: Or you could have left it up to my Uncle Mac to decide whether or not he wanted to look the other way. Instead, you forced the issue, and now Jason is locked up in Pentonville until his trial. Remind me not to do you any favors.

Lucky: Thanks.

Elizabeth: I didn't do anything.

Lucky: Exactly.

Sam: Go ahead. Tell the world that I watched Jake Spencer being kidnapped. And while you're at it, make sure you tell the world that Jason Morgan is the baby's real father. I think it's about time the truth comes out, don't you?

Amelia: You're right. Why go down alone when you can take Lucky and Elizabeth's marriage with you? I mean, he'll be devastated, of course, but at least two people will have a happy ending. Elizabeth will follow her heart straight to Jason. He'll be free -- assuming he's out of prison -- to have the family he's always wanted.

Sam: You have no idea what Jason wants.

Amelia: If it's a choice between a loving mother of his only child and the deceitful bitch who stood by and watched his little boy get kidnapped, how long do you think it's going to take Jason to make up his mind? Even if Jason has to spend the rest of his life in prison, at least he'll know Jake will be provided for. When the truth comes out, no doubt Jake will get all of Jason's money, and you'll be left broke and homeless. Unless, of course, you think your mother will be willing to take you in after she learns that you facilitated a kidnapping.

Sam: Okay, shut up!

Carly: Wow. Artistic differences?

Amelia: Would you like to update Carly, or should I? Okay, then -- turns out Sam actually knew more --

Sam: I will update her. I blew off a shoot today, even though I knew Amelia already paid for the location.

Carly: Wow, it's nice to see Jason's not the only one you're taking advantage of.

Sam: I will be in work on time tomorrow. Okay?

Amelia: You sure about that?

Sam: Yeah, I'm sure about that. The job you hired me for -- I'll be there. See you then.

Amelia: Wise choice.

Carly: You better hold on to that job. When Jason gets back, he's going to kick you out of here.

Sam: I don't know what fantasy world you're living in, but I'm not going anywhere.

Lainey: Here's the psych consult on the patient in 1026.

Epiphany: Isn't Dr. Bennett on call today?

Lainey: Yeah, but I was already on the floor, so I decided to take care of it myself. At least now you won't have to wait an hour for her to return your page.

Epiphany: Well, I'd rather wait than run interference between you and Elizabeth for the rest of my shift.

Lainey: Look, I know things were tense earlier but --

Epiphany: Look, Lainey, this is Elizabeth's first day back since the kidnapping. She's got most of her mind locked in on those two little boys downstairs in daycare. I don't need what's left focused on the fight with you.

Lainey: I already spoke with Elizabeth about what happened, and I know she's mad at me. But I think she's in turmoil mostly because she's angry with Lucky for treating her like a suspect during Jake's disappearance.

Epiphany: Well, she's decided to take it out on you. So please do me a favor, and when you see Elizabeth coming, turn around and march your butt back to where you came from. She doesn't need any more distractions, and neither do I.

Patrick: You okay?

Robin: Yeah, why?

Patrick: Well, you just tore into Lucky in front of his wife and half the staff. Thought you only saved that for me.

Robin: Yeah, well, I made an exception. I'm sorry, but you don't throw someone in jail after they save your child. I mean, you say thank you, and you look the other way.

Patrick: What if the person in question is charged with murder?

Robin: Look, I'm not defending who Jason is or what he does for a living. But he put himself on the line to rescue a child, and he does not deserve to be locked up for that.

Patrick: So it's the rescuing of the child that's got you all fired up?

Robin: No. A long time ago, Michael Corinthos was kidnapped. I found out that Tony Jones was behind it, and I went to him to try and talk him into giving Michael back. But Tony was in a really bad place then, and there was just no reasoning with him. If Jason hadn't shown up when he did, I would have died of pneumonia.

Patrick: So Jason saved you?

Robin: I still remember how it felt. I mean, I was too weak to even sit up. He put me in his arms and he carried me out. I don't know -- maybe that's why I went off on Lucky, because -- say what you will about Jason, but he is a good person, and he did an amazing thing.

Patrick: You know, it surprises me the way you talk about Jason. I mean, at Carly and Jax's wedding, you guys didn't say two words to each other.

Robin: Well, we have different lives. Doesn't mean that I don't care about him and what happens to him.

Patrick: Hmm.

Robin: In a very platonic, nonsexual way, of course.

Patrick: Yes, of course.

Robin: So you can just stop getting jealous, because you have absolutely nothing to worry about.

Logan: Yeah, everything's set for tomorrow night.

Maxie: How long is it going to take for you to put that self-righteous Lulu in her place?

Logan: I was working.

Maxie: Yeah, answer my question. You can call them back.

Logan: Don't you ever embarrass me in front of Sonny's people again, you understand me?

Maxie: I'm sorry. I just want to know what's going on with Lulu.

Logan: A little anxious?

Maxie: Don't flatter yourself.

Logan: I just call it like I see it.

Maxie: So do I, and from what I saw at Kelly's, you have no chance of getting Lulu into bed.

Logan: Lulu's just playing hard to get, all right? I'll take her to the catacomb tomorrow night, loosen her up with a few drinks, take her back to my place and seal the deal.

Maxie: Remember, it doesn't count unless I see it.

Logan: All right, I know. I know. You want to watch.

Maxie: No, I want proof, because I don't trust you. Remember, if you don't sleep with Lulu, I'm not going to sleep with you.

Lulu: Wow! And you call me a slut? Coop's been at work all of five minutes, and you're already throwing yourself at his best friend.

Maxie: Actually, I was telling Logan to back off. Now that Coop's in the academy, he doesn't need a jerk like Logan making him look bad.

Lulu: Hmm -- then Coop should get rid of you next.

Maxie: Uh-huh. Don't hold your breath.

Lulu: You don't seriously expect me to believe that Maxie was here for Coop.

Logan: Hell, no. She was here for me.

Eli: Look, no offense, dude, but seeing my double walking around in a doctor's coat is like a violation of the natural order of things.

Noah: Yeah. I know the feeling. I spent years hiding from reality in the bottom of a bottle. You're like a -- a bad flashback.

Eli: Really? Why don't you sign my release papers, and we won't have to see each other ever again.

Noah: Look -- you need this operation.

Eli: If I don't do this concert, there's going to be a lot of little kids dying instead. All right, this concert will raise a lot of money for research.

Noah: All right, look, if the only way for you to have this operation is for me to get up on stage and pretend to be you, I'll do it. Wait, what are you doing?

Eli: Do you think I spent two decades building my car-- my reputation as a musician so a -- an amateur could throw it away in one night, forget it.

Epiphany: No, you're going to keep your butt in this bed.

Eli: I'm checking out.

Robin: What's going on?

Epiphany: Mr. Love thinks he's leaving.

Patrick: You're not going anywhere.

Eli: Just watch me.

Eli: Get this thing out of my arm.

Robin: Listen, you are on blood thinners. If you take that out, your clot could get worse.

Patrick: The medication is just a stopgap. You could have a fatal embolism at any time.

Eli: Really? Well, that'd be preferable to watching your old man get up on stage for me.

Noah: Hey, you don't have to kill yourself to stop me from singing, okay? I was never crazy about the idea in the first place.

Patrick: You happy now?

Eli: Hey, mate, this is not a joke, all right? I gave my word to these people I'd play this concert.

Epiphany: If you love your fans as much as you claim you do, then you should be willing to make a few sacrifices. Have the surgery so you can be around to record another album.

Eli: Hey, nice try. It's not going to work. I'm leaving. If you people want to stand around and watch me pull this thing out of my arm and get into my clothes, you're welcome to it, knock yourself out.

Epiphany: Well, you can go right on ahead -- it's not the first time I have seen it.

[Alarm]

Eli: Oh --

Robin: Give me the crash cart, stat.

Epiphany: Oh, he's out.

Lulu: I don't get it. Why would Maxie try to use you to make me jealous?

Logan: Who cares? Who even knows why Maxie does anything? More importantly, we need to discuss tomorrow night. That is why you're here, isn't it?

Lulu: What if it is?

Logan: I have everything taken care of, all right? You show up to catacomb club tomorrow night, 10:00. I'm going to pay for your cover up front. You just walk right in.

Lulu: Hmm, and wait around? Great date.

Logan: I have some business that I have to attend to for Sonny, but I'll be back there as soon as I can.

Lulu: Oh, I wouldn't exactly call sweeping up Sonny's office after he's gone important business.

Logan: Oh, that's cute. For your information, Sonny asked me to handle a shipment for him tomorrow night.

Lulu: Why would he do that?

Logan: With Jason locked up, Sonny's other people have to pick up the slack. I'm one of them. Taking that shipment tomorrow night is going to prove to Sonny that I can handle something bigger.

Georgie: Hey, Coop. Do you know what you want, or do you need a few more minutes?

Coop: No. Hey, I'm here to see Maxie. I got a message, and she said that it was important, couldn't wait till after my shift. Have you seen her?

Georgie: Yeah, actually. Her and I kind of got into it earlier, and she stormed out. I have no idea when she's going to be --

Maxie: Hi. Sorry to keep you waiting, and I'm sorry I yelled at you about talking to Lulu before. If you want to be her friend, that's your business, not mine.

Georgie: Since when?

Maxie: I have other priorities.

Georgie: I doubt that.

Coop: Are you all right?

Maxie: Yeah, why?

Coop: Well, you said I had to leave work and run over here. I mean --

Maxie: Oh -- I got us on the list for the Catacomb Club for tomorrow night. I'm so excited. I've been dying to go.

Coop: I can't.

Maxie: I know you hate dancing, but I really want to --

Coop: It's not that. I have a stakeout tomorrow night.

Maxie: Is it dangerous?

Coop: Yeah, it could be. I have to intercept one of Sonny's shipments.

Carly: If you talk to Jason -- not that you will -- tell him I put his marriage certificate back.

Sam: Marriage certificate?

Carly: Yes. From his wedding to Brenda. See, since Jason's only allowed to have visitors from his lawyer or his wife, I used it to get in and visit Jason. Don't try and pull the same scam. The guards are never going to buy there's another Brenda Barrett Morgan out there, so -- but you know, that shouldn't be too disappointing for you, because you don't seem to be at all concerned about Jason.

Sam: Get out of my house, please.

Carly: This isn't your house, it's Jason's, and when he comes back, you're out of here.

Sam: Okay, you can keep telling yourself that.

Carly: Do you know the whole time I was in Pentonville, he never once asked about you. And then when I brought up your name, he changed the subject really, really fast.

Sam: You don't even know what you're talking about.

Carly: I know Jason, okay? The wall is down. And you can cry and you can beg. It's over. You know what, Sam? You're someone Jason used to love.

Elizabeth: I guess we need to start cutting back on our visits. The daycare people are getting annoyed that we're dropping by every 15 minutes.

Lucky: Sure, just as long as the boys are okay.

Elizabeth: Anyway, I'm going to get back to work. I'll see you later tonight.

Lucky: Okay. Elizabeth -- can -- can we talk about what happened with Robin?

Elizabeth: Why?

Lucky: Well, did Robin go off on me because of something you told her?

Elizabeth: Robin and I have never discussed Jason's arrest.

Lucky: But you agreed with what she said.

Elizabeth: You know, it's easy to dismiss something when it comes out of Carly's mouth, but when it comes from a rational person like Robin, it's pretty hard not to listen. If she thinks you acted unfairly, perhaps it's time to admit that you did.

Jason: I heard you were being released today.

Elizabeth: Yeah, Dr. Lee gave me a clean bill of health.

Jason: That's good. How are you getting home?

Elizabeth: Lucky's coming -- with Cameron. They're -- and they should be here soon.

Jason: Okay. I'll just -- you know, I'll get out of your way.

Elizabeth: Actually, I'm really glad you're here because I was thinking once we go home, things might get a little -- um -- a little crazy, you know, with my schedule and your schedule. I don't know when you're -- you're going to get to see him again.

[Elizabeth sighs]

Elizabeth: Do you want to hold him?

Jason: Yeah.

Elizabeth: There you go, Jake. There you go.

Jason: It's -- it's "Jake"?

Elizabeth: Yeah. It's short for Jacob Martin. I gave him your initials.

Jason: Jacob Martin. I like it.

>> On the next "General Hospital" --

Robin: This patient needs you, Patrick.

Russell: Sign off on the patient's transfer to the county.

Carly: Admit it. You have a thing for Jerry and you're jealous.

Ric: Sonny's landing his shipment tonight.

Sonny: Everything's set?

Logan: It'll go like clockwork.

Coop: What do you want me to do?

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