The Bold and The Beautiful Transcript Wednesday 5/13/09

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Provided By Suzanne
Proofread By Jenni

Pam: I-I'm on the "Inside Fashion" website, but what do I do now?

Stephanie: Just press the space bar.

Pam: All right.

Stephanie: Hi. Well, I'm so delighted that you logged in to our website. (Chuckles) This is, um, "Inside Fashion" with Stephanie Forrester, and do you know what they told me? They told me we had thousands of hits on our website yesterday. This is so amazing. Yeah.

Pam: What? Oh.

Stephanie: It tells me that you want to hear more of my story and the rest of "The Logan Chronicles." There'll be plenty of time for me to introduce you to each and every one of the Logans. Believe me. And I'll also tell you how they have brought about the downfall of the Forrester empire. (Chuckles)

Pam: Stephanie!

Stephanie: Let's start with the current Mrs. Forrester, Eric’s wife, "Mrs. Delicious" Donna Forrester. That's how he sees her, and I'm going to tell you the tale of how she won his heart.

Pam: (Gasps)

Donna: Stephanie?

Pam: Oh!

Stephanie: Oh, hi, Donna.

Donna: Why does security keep letting you into this building?

Stephanie: Uh, maybe it has something to do with the hopeful look on their faces when they say, "Hi, Stephanie. Are you here to stay?"

Pam: (Laughs) Look, I'm having a little coffee break with my big sister. Is it--is that a problem for you, Donna?

Donna: Just keep her away from the cutting room and the seamstresses.

Stephanie: Oh, Donna. Oh, please don't be concerned at all. We're not going to do an underwear line this year. Your designs are safe.

Eric: Yes, well, look, if--if the satin doesn't work for you, what about, uh, what about moiré silk?

Donna: Honey break?

Eric: Uh, you know what? I'm gonna check those dye lots, and I'm gonna get right back to you.

Donna: (Giggles)

Eric: Come here. Come here.

Donna: You're my honey bear.

Eric: Come here. Come here. Come here. Mm.

Donna: (Giggles)

Eric: Would you like your honey, um, sur la table or on the hoof?

Donna: Ooh. Both.

Eric: Mm. Yeah?

Donna: (Laughs)

Eric: We better get started.

Stephanie: (Laughs) Well, there she is. Mrs. Delicious Donna Forrester in all her glory.

Pam: The skeletons are tumbling out of the closet now, Thorne.

Thorne: Oh, I can't wait to see the look on Dad's face when he hears about this.

Pam: I don't think honey bear's gonna be too happy.

Thorne: (Chuckles) No, I-- (chuckles) no. (Sighs) (Door opens)

Eric: (Mumbling indistinctly)

Donna: (Laughs) Wait--oh! (Clears throat)

Thorne: You wanted to go over the production calendar?

Eric: Yeah.

Donna: Tea-- I mean, honey for your tea?

Eric: Yes, uh, thank you. Yeah.

Donna: Right.

Thorne: Spare me. If I may interest you in real life for a moment, you may want to check out Mother's webcast on the "Eye on Fashion" web site.

Eric: Wait, your mother is doing a webcast?

Thorne: Hell hath no fury, et cetera, et cetera. She's calling it "The Logan Chronicles."

Eric: (Groans) Stephanie.

Stephanie: You know, I ask myself...

Donna: (Sighs)

Stephanie: Whatever happened to that incredibly gifted designer Eric Forrester? What you see on the catwalks at Forrester Creations, you know, is just now artificial and false. It reflects the way Eric is living and designing. Any person out there, any woman out there, who's looking for class and style is no longer going to find that at Forrester Creations. To say that the Forrester of today is the same as the Forrester of yesteryear, well, that's just plain false advertising.

Jackie: Hmm.

Stephanie: I wouldn't buy a Forrester label if I were you, but then that's just me.

Jackie: Oh, ho ho. Well, leave it to Stephanie to find the perfect revenge. But you could put a bug in her ear, you know, about talking up Jackie M. while she's talking down Forrester.

Owen: Well, is that an order?

Jackie: Please don't tell me you're still sulking about last night. (Scoffs) Oh, God. You know, all I did was acknowledge, if it weren't already obvious, that your value to me is not solely professional.

Owen: Well, that's not very flattering to my abilities.

Jackie: Oh, ho ho. I made you chief of staff.

Owen: Yeah, a glorified office manager.

Jackie: Well, there you go then, because office managers are not in short supply. But no one could be to me what you are.

Owen: Today it's a compliment, but last night, it was coercion.

Jackie: You're perfectly free to do what you like, but while you work for me, you'll do what I like first. Now what employer doesn't ask that of middle management?

Owen: Well, I'm going to lunch with Bridget today.

Jackie: Well, your lunch hour's your own time.

Owen: And I'd prefer not to be interrupted.

Jackie: Well, you better be quick about it. Your job is to come when I call. And my job is to make sure that you never regret it.

Bridget: Hi. Hi, Jackie. Owen, were we gonna go out for lunch or order in?

Owen: Go out.

Jackie: Order it in.

Bridget: I am so glad that we ordered in. I do not like dealing with traffic when I don't have to.

Owen: Hey, I got to agree with you on that one.

Bridget: So how's it going with Jackie? Talk about moving up the ranks.

Owen: Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I guess.

Bridget: What does that mean? You don't think you're doing well? I mean, she adores you.

Owen: No, I just-- I don't know. It seems like I make a bad decision every place I land.

Bridget: Such as what? I haven't noticed.

Owen: Well, when I first started working at Forrester, Felicia offered me a large, large amount of money to do something that, uh, wasn't exactly honest, and, uh, wait a minute. You never heard about this?

Bridget: What did you say?

Owen: Well, I-I said yeah. I said yeah.

Bridget: Wow. And Felicia and I used to be really close, but, well, there's been a chill in the air ever since my dad married Donna.

Owen: Yeah, well, I mean, it--it never panned out, so...

Bridget: Why not?

Owen: Well, I don't know. I just felt really lousy about the whole thing, and I blew the whistle. I blew-- well, blew the whistle on her. (Chuckles)

Bridget: Oh, my goodness. I know all about that temper.

Owen: (Chuckles)

Bridget: That must not have been very pretty.

Owen: No, but the point is that-- the point is that I can be bought.

Bridget: No, the point is, when it came down to it, you did the right thing.

Owen: Look, I don't-- I'm not trying to get you to think less of me. I'm just trying to keep you from being shocked when you do.

Thorne: (Sighs) Well, good lord, Mother's launching an all-out smear campaign.

Donna: Um, where does she get off? I mean, isn't there something criminal about what she's doing? She's slandering my family and me.

Thorne: I'm a little more worried about her telling the world not to buy Forrester.

Eric: Oh, God, Stephanie.

Donna: (Sighs)

Eric: How can you do this to us?

Thorne: Maybe we ought to watch the rest of it.

Stephanie: You know, at Jackie M., we're absolutely determined to bring to you what, uh,

Forrester Creations used to but is no longer capable of. Our designs are going to be youthful, stylish and classy. I will say, that at one time, there was no better designer in the business than Eric. See this photo I just put up? That's the Forrester Creations that you knew and loved. Somebody asked me once not too long ago... (chuckles) when did I realize that the emperor no longer had any clothes on. "Oh," I said, "when I first saw

this photograph." There he is.

Eric: (Sighs)

Stephanie: That's the real Eric as we know him today, thanks to all those

Logan bitches. Well, thank you for logging in and turning on "The Logan Chronicles." I'll see you tomorrow.

Donna: She's not gonna get away with this.

Thorne: Hmm, well, don't look now, but she already has.

Donna: Oh, no.

(Door opens)

(Door closes)

Owen: W-w-well, what about the opera?

Bridget: Eh, I'm not a huge fan.

Owen: Oh, I know. There's just too much standing around and bellowing.

Bridget: Honestly, a little simple dinner is great. Any little dive place that the health department hasn't closed down.

Owen: What about the ballet?

Bridget: Really? N-no.

Owen: Yeah.

Bridget: Those tickets are so expensive. No.

Owen: No, come on. Seriously. I can take care of it. I want to take you someplace nice.

Bridget: Well, I mean, who doesn't like the ballet? Hot men in tights? But that's what the "Spiderman" movies are for, so... (Sighs) What?

Owen: No--nothing. I--I could wear tights to the office tomorrow for you. La da da…

Bridget: (Giggles)

Owen: (Laughs)

Bridget: You're pretty darn cute, you know that?

Owen: No, no, I'm not. All right? No, I'm bad. And don't you encourage me, 'cause every time you say something nice to me, I'm starting to wonder. I'm like, "is that a green light, or is that a yellow light?"

Bridget: And w-what traffic sign are you exactly?

Owen: "Merge"?

Bridget: I guess I'm probably "yield"-- proceed with care, unless you see trouble ahead.

Owen: Hmm. Looks to me like it's all clear. (Cell phone rings) (Ring)

Bridget: It's okay. Get your phone. (Ring)

Owen: (Groans) Owen Knight.

Jackie: (Meows)

Owen: Okay, can I call you right back? I'm right in the middle of a meeting.

Jackie: At the tone, pacific daylight time will be 1:00 and 1 minute. Beep. Lunchtime's over.

Bridget: Do you have to go?

Jackie: Come to the basement, the door marked "under repair." And you can throw the sign away.

Owen: Uh, duty calls.

Bridget: Well, thank you for lunch.

Owen: Thank you for yielding.

Donna: You bitter woman.

Stephanie: Well, nice to see you, too.

Donna: You know, I am not surprised that you would say this about me and my family. I have heard it a hundred times, and so has half of L.A. But for you to say this about Eric-- my God, your own children, Stephanie. To expose their father to this kind of ridicule-- how could you?

Stephanie: Excuse me. I think you are the person that has made my ex-husband the subject of ridicule. You know, you and he are walking around with blinders on. Hopefully, they'll fall off of him, and he'll see exactly what kind of a fool you have made of him in public.

Donna: (Scoffs) Oh, what, and then he's going to go back to you?

Stephanie: No. (Sighs) That bridge has been burned.

Donna: That's right.

Stephanie: All I can hope is that someday, he'll get some real backbone, wash his hands of you, and then it'll all have been worth it.

Owen: Hello?

Jackie: Do you see how important my employees are to me? Sally--and, oh, she let rust and rot have its way with this steam room. Perhaps it was the only way to keep Clarke at his desk, but I have restored it for the health and the well-being of my very hard-working chief of staff. Please don't just stand there. You're far too overdressed. (Sighs) Why the hurry?

Owen: Jackie, we have got a problem.

Jackie: Oh, yeah. Your clothes are getting soaked.

Owen: Look, you knew that I was out at lunch with Bridget.

Jackie: Mm-hmm, and I waited until 1:00. You had your private time. And now you're back on the clock with me. Tick-tock. Why are you still dressed?

Owen: So what does that make me? What does it make me? A callboy?

Jackie: Why are you making this so ugly? I mean, I thought that we had an understanding.

Owen: Look, every man has got a fantasy.

Jackie: Mm.

Owen: And it looks just like this.

Jackie: (Chuckles)

Owen: It looks like you, and I got to live it. But come on. We've got to face reality here. This relationship is going nowhere.

Jackie: Well, I don't want it to go anywhere. I had two failed, miserable marriages. I don't want a relationship. (Sighs)

Owen: Well, maybe I do.

Jackie: And who's stopping you, hmm? I mean, you want to fall madly in love with Bridget. You want to live happily ever after. Go for it. And you know what? If my son doesn't come to his senses and leave Katie Logan... (chuckles) it might even happen. And I'll be the first to congratulate you. I tell you what, I'll even throw you an engagement party. But you are not even sleeping with Bridget. Or am I mistaken?

Owen: No.

Jackie: Then fidelity isn't a problem, and I fail to see how you being here with me denies either one of you anything. You know, some people, they find the past to be, well, such a burden, but actually, it's the future that is frightening-- all those choices you have to make. Ooh. All those problems you have to solve. Mm. You just can't imagine how you're gonna get there from here. But you know what? All you ever have to really get through is today.

Jackie: And we can do it.

Donna: Whatever happens to you, you just reach for the nearest cartoon character. You are the-- the betrayed, faithful wife. Brooke and I are the blonde bimbos who did you wrong, and Eric is the selfish old goat who--who never appreciated your inner qualities. No one is a real flesh-and-blood human being, and--and nothing-- nothing is ever your responsibility.

Stephanie: Oh, I see. So I should be what, um, sophisticated and mature like you and say what? Um, "the Logan girls were just following their hearts when the descended upon me and my family like locusts"?

Donna: Or could it be that the Forrester men were so starved of love and affection that they just couldn't get enough of us?

Stephanie: Are you really so foolish? Do you really think that your-- (chuckles) the face that you see in the mirror every morning is the same face that you're going to see a few years from now? You're gonna end up all alone. I'm not alone, because I have my children and my grandchildren. You're not going to have children, because that is not what Eric wants from you, and when all of the honey is squeezed out of the bottle, you'll just be plastic.

Donna: I am so tired of your bull. Do you know what the world owes you, Stephanie? Nothing. Nothing. You are not special. You are gonna stop this smear campaign, or I swear to God, the other side of the story will be out in the press. You want a war, babe? I will give you a war. Why can't you just accept the fact that the Forrester men are finally happy? Accept it. Accept it and move on. Be gracious with defeat. Is--isn't that what they teach you in your etiquette school? Your days are over, toots. Over.

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