All My Children Transcript Monday 6/6/05

By Boo
Proofread by Gisele

Amanda: Oh, would you do something for me if I said please?

Jack: Sweetheart, when you sent me back to the yacht to get something you'd left there, I kind of had in mind, oh, hair dryer, makeup case.

Erica: On what planet would I ever forget my makeup case?

Jack: I think maybe the very same planet that you would have any use for this, but -- [Irish brogue] There she is, the compass and binnacle ye asked for.

Erica: Oh, Jack. Isn't she beautiful?

Jack: [Normal voice] Yeah.

Erica: And now that we’re back in our homeport, I really just wanted to have her as a -- as a souvenir of our honeymoon. You chart a bold and true course for our fabulous future, Captain Jack.

Jack: [Irish brogue] You bet I will. Come here. [Normal voice] Just hold that thought, will you?

[Jack approaches the stranger that’s been following them and grabs him by his coat’s lapels.]

Jack: If you want to leave here with all your teeth, walk out right now. And I don't ever want to catch you near my wife again. You got me?

Kendall: What the hell?

J.R.: Saved you again.

[J.R. and Kendall start kissing.]

Maria: Ryan. Hey.

Ryan: Hey.

Maria: Um -- I heard about your procedure, because Greenlee was in here yesterday ripping on Dr. Cooper and me and --

Ryan: Yeah, I heard, but I didn't know you were involved. Sit down, sit down.

Maria: Yeah, she's pretty upset.

Ryan: Well, she's got every right to be.

Maria: Well, we had a talk. I mean, I tried to -- to get her focused on how much you guys love each other and your marriage, but I don't know if she heard me.

Ryan: Well, something you said must've filtered through, because she came home, and we talked, and she seemed to understand what I did, and she even started to believe that we could have a happy marriage without kids.

Greenlee: I don't have an account number, but the name of the donor is my husband -- Lavery, Ryan Lavery. I know for a fact he left enough little swimmers on deposit to make a billion babies, so let's get them defrosted and inside me on the double. This is the optimal day in my cycle to conceive.

Nurse: Mrs. Lavery, what Ob/Gyn referred you?

Greenlee: That guy who runs a great big HMO in the sky, who said "Be fruitful and multiply."

Nurse: Well, the doctor will still need your records, perform an internal exam, take your medical history, consent forms, insurance, blood work.

Greenlee: You know, red tape and bureaucratic BS doesn't exist in nature. You just put a man and a woman together, and, voilà.

Nurse: Then I suggest you avoid all this red tape, find your husband, and voilà.

Ryan: Our whole future depends on Greenlee understanding why I had to do something so drastic, making our future 100% childproof.

Maria: These are your post-op test results. Looks like the procedure was a success.

Ryan: Funny they don't make greeting cards for this occasion.

Maria: Ryan -- look, tell me this. Did you do this because of Edmund? Did you do it because your brother killed my husband?

Jack: I apologize for threatening you with extreme dental work.

Erica: Well, I'm sure you can understand my husband's reaction. I mean, the man from the tearoom in Charleston suddenly mysteriously showing up at our own yacht club in Pine Valley?

Jack: But now that we know you live and work here and dock your boat at our marina, now I'm even more mortified, so, sorry.

Dr. Madden: Look, please don't think about it. Apology accepted. Who was it that said, "Paranoia is the best defense"? I imagine for someone as famous as you, Miss Kane, you're in an endless stream of persistent fans and perhaps the occasional nut job.

Erica: Oh, well, as Dame Edna says, "Megastardom has its price." My life is rarely my own.

Jack: And what is left is mine. But now that we know you're not a stalker with a shrine to Erica in your root cellar, please join us for a drink?

Erica: Yes, please do.

Dr. Madden: Well, thank you, but I -- no, I won't. Go, enjoy each other. I -- I have a very busy schedule. If I hadn't miscalculated the local tides, I would've nabbed the guest mooring two hours ago.

Erica: Well, now that we have met, I hope that we will chart new beginnings.

Jack: Yes, I'm sure our paths will cross again very soon.

Dr. Madden: And once again, congratulations on your marriage.

Jack: Thank you.

Erica: Thank you.

Dr. Madden: I hope you'll very happy. Excuse me.

Erica: Jack, I know he denied it, but I know him from somewhere, somewhere before Charleston.

Babe: I guess Amanda took Little Adam.

Jamie: Yep.

Babe: I just hate that I had to leave him. But tell me, did you have a nice visit?

Jamie: Yeah, it was fine.

Babe: Oh, come on -- "fine"? When was the last time you got to see our little boy?

Jamie: How was Krystal?

Babe: Less fine than she pretends to be.

Jamie: Well, then, be honest with me, Babe. Are we less fine than you pretend to be?

Babe: Where did that come from?

Jamie: I know it blows working nights, and we never have enough money.

Babe: Sure, it's not the greatest, but it's not going to be forever.

Jamie: Yeah, but are you happy?

Babe: I have you. Of course, I'm happy.

Jamie: Yeah, but, what about your dreams, Babe? I mean, do you seriously like living above a garage?

Babe: Do you remember when I had more credit cards than a girl can count and I was, like, a phone call away from whatever the Chandler money could buy? I also had a husband who hated me. Now, I'll take this any day.

Jamie: I'm not your husband.

Babe: Not yet. Hey, the only thing missing is that little boy from making us a family.

Jamie: I will give you the life you deserve one day.

Babe: You know, even with everything sucky that's going on in my life right now, I am happy because of you. Hey, what is up with you anyway? Did something happen?

Aidan: Let me guess. You want me to slather your delicate skin with SPF-30.

Amanda: There are way better pickup lines if that's what I was doing, like, "Are you a parking ticket, because you've got fine written all over you."

Aidan: Did anyone ever warn you about talking to strangers?

Amanda: Um -- I must've missed that day. Do you know to point and shoot Fuji cam x10? I promised my mom I'd send her pictures of me on the beach. She says that's what she misses most since she's been in the hospital -- you know, squishing her toes in the sand, walking out on the pier.

Aidan: Well, I'm sorry that your mum's not well. But you want me to take pictures of --

Amanda: Me with the sand and surf in the background -- if it's not too much of a pain.

Aidan: No, sure. I -- I doubt it will hurt.

Amanda: All right. Where is a good spot?

Aidan: Um -- how about that rock over there?

Amanda: Oh, cool.

Aidan: That looks good.

Amanda: Ok. All right. How's this?

Aidan: Perfect. That looks great. Hold that. Wow. That's the money shot right there.

Amanda: Can we get off a couple more?

Aidan: Sure. I can use your whole memory card if you like.

Kendall: Hmm, interesting. There's the kiss to shut me up, the prelude-to-hot-sex lip scorcher, assorted chews and nibbles, but that one -- I don't know, I've never had that kiss before.

J.R.: Hmm. There's your clue right there.

Kendall: Ok. Yeah, yeah, I got it. I got it.

J.R.: Yeah.

Kendall: Kissing the married woman.

J.R.: Well, the very gorgeous, hot, exciting, generous married woman.

Kendall: Aren't you going to ask me what I brought you back from Boca?

J.R.: My golden future, thanks to your wedding. You know, actually, you're the first married woman I've ever kissed -- well, besides Babe.

Kendall: Ok, well, don't go smooching around for any golden futures, yours or mine.

J.R.: You did marry Slater?

Kendall: Yeah, but that's only half the story. You missed the kicker.

J.R.: I'm not looking into the face of the woman who's going to be giving me Chandler Enterprises back.

Kendall: No, my lovely new husband decided to yank the lawsuit from Cambias, so I get nothing but a share of Zach's casinos, and you get nothing but that kiss.

J.R.: You mean nothing but a kiss-off. Look, I know that Slater -- he backed you into a corner. You wouldn't cut me like this.

Kendall: Ok, J.R., this isn't all about you. I took some hits, too.

J.R.: Yeah, but we had a deal. You were going to marry Zach, and you were going to deliver me back Chandler's. How did that all fall apart?

Kendall: Well, Zach realized that the terms weren't as attractive as he first thought.

J.R.: And you didn't fight him on that?

Kendall: I did at first. But ultimately, this deal was his to make or break.

J.R.: You marry the guy in good faith, and now he's just -- he's going to back out on his part of the bargain? You're going along with that?

Kendall: What did you want me to do, J.R.? What, did you want me to scratch his eyes out?

J.R.: Yes, I do!

Kendall: Well, I'm sorry. Zach realized he couldn't save his son by trying to destroy him, so he opted to cut his losses, ok? I'm sorry, that's the breaks.

J.R.: I burn my bridges with Ethan, I turn my future to toast for you. And then, because you and Zach want to leave Ethan alone, so he's going to run my family business, I have to sit back and watch him run Chandler into the ground as payback?

Kendall: Ok, listen, I know you're upset. I know you thought you were so close to having it back.

J.R.: No, this is it, Kendall. It's -- what you don't understand is he's not just holding on to the company. He's dismantling it. If you and your husband do not go and get Cambias Industries back, everything my father has sweated for, my son's legacy, is going to go right down a rat hole. All I'm asking you is for you and your husband to revisit -- revisit your options. Throw me a scrap. You know that I hate to beg you.

Greenlee: Nurse, my husband is no longer capable of producing and delivering his own genetic materials, but given he had the foresight to have several million of the little tykes frozen for future freshness, I don't see there's a problem with me, his wife, making a withdrawal.

Nurse: And I'm trying to explain that's not how this clinic operates.

Greenlee: Look, I can prove I'm Mrs. Ryan Lavery. You want ID? Here, I've got it. Here's my passport, my -- my driver's license, my Lacey’s VIP platinum card. This entitles me to his sperm.

Nurse: Mrs. Lavery, we don't operate as a bank, even though that's how the public perceives us.

Greenlee: Yeah, and I'm not bucking for a wall calendar or free toaster.

Nurse: We work with anonymous donors who are assigned lot numbers. There are confidentiality issues, legal liabilities. We maintain a very strict protocol according to the highest standards.

Greenlee: Why didn't you say so? Would a cool thou take the edge off any legal liabilities, huh? I'll sign a waiver to avoid any embarrassing lawsuits. No? 5,000? 10,000? How much to pave over any legal stumbling blocks, ok? 15,000? I'm good for it. I'm loaded. And if we have a girl, I'll name her after you -- Hazel.

Hazel: Mrs. Lavery, is there someone I can call? Your husband?

Greenlee: I told you I don't need my husband right now. I need you.

Hazel: I can't help you. We can't help you, so if you'll just go quietly --

Greenlee: How can I make this clear? I am not leaving this place without enough fertilizer to make my blossoms grow. Now, fork it over! Who are they?

Hazel: Mrs. Lavery, these ladies have come to escort you out.

Greenlee: They touch me and die.

Hazel: I have tried to explain why we can't accommodate your request.

Greenlee: Well, accommodate this. Let go of me. Let go of me. Let go of me! Let go!

Dr. Madden: What the devil is going on here?

Hazel: Mrs. Lavery tried to bribe me into releasing her husband's donation.

Greenlee: I said let go.

Dr. Madden: It's all right, Hazel. Mrs. Lavery, isn't it?

Greenlee: Who are you? The procreation police?

Dr. Madden: I'm Dr. Madden. This is my clinic.

Greenlee: Doc, your nurse's front office manner could use a lot of work, not to mention the tag team twins.

Hazel: I beg your pardon, Doctor, but this woman stormed in here --

Dr. Madden: I'll take it from here, Hazel. It's all right. Mrs. Lavery, would you care to step into my office? Please, take a seat. Now, from what I gather, your husband made a donation here, and you want it back.

Greenlee: Thank you. Finally, someone who gets it. When can I get it?

Dr. Madden: Well, you can't.

Greenlee: Now, don't you go all Hazel on me.

Dr. Madden: Mrs. Lavery, your husband signed a contract stipulating that he would remain anonymous.

Greenlee: Well, I know who Ryan is, so no problem.

Dr. Madden: Prospective parents -- they get a profile of the sperm donor. They get medical history, physical data. They never get the identity, so it's not as if you can walk in here, and you can order up a sample of Ryan Lavery.

Greenlee: I can, and I am.

Dr. Madden: No, I'm afraid you cannot. There's also the matter of the quit claim. You see, when your husband received financial compensation for his donation, he gave up all rights to our purchase. So it's almost as if he sold us a house, and you've come in here asking for a room back.

Greenlee: Well, not a big room. Just the baby's nursery.

Dr. Madden: To put it quite simply, neither you nor your husband has any legal rights to his donation or any issue therefrom.

Greenlee: Doctor, I'm a businesswoman. In every contract, there's a loophole. Help me find one.

Dr. Madden: I suppose it might make a difference if your husband were to be here, and he could state his own case.

Greenlee: Well, there's only one problem with that. He's been through a terrible trauma. He's temporarily deranged.

Ryan: What Jonathan did to Edmund puts what it means to be a Lavery right in my face, but, Maria, it already existed. It was already there -- the rage, the fire burning in my stomach. And I had to make sure that that is not passed on to a child, an innocent child, or that it could come back and hurt a child or hurt Greenlee.

Maria: Pretty radical move, though.

Ryan: Only choice I could make.

Maria: Well, I know you believe that, but I'm a doctor. I'm a scientist, so I don't believe that evil is genetic.

Ryan: Tell that to my late brothers. Look, I know that I made the right decision. I mean, I've been walking around with the entire Lavery family on my back, and now that it seems that Greenlee and I have dodged that bullet, the weight is lifted and the fire in my stomach is finally starting to go out, and I can't tell you how good that feels.

Maria: Well, you know, I've got to give it to you, because I don't even think most guys would have admitted there was any problem at all. They probably just would've thrown themselves into work or started drinking too much or taken it out on everybody, you know, around them. And you saw a threat to your future with Greenlee and you did something about it. So I -- I mean, I think that your science is a little fuzzy. I also think that lies in marriage are obviously not good, but I have to say I admire you for what you did.

[Ryan gives Maria a big hug.]

Aidan: Your memory card is full.

Amanda: Well, thanks for helping out.

Aidan: No problem.

Amanda: Whoo. Those supermodels earn their paychecks. It's hard work. How about a soda at the beach shack? My treat?

Aidan: Thanks, but I really should go for my run.

Amanda: Well, you could definitely skip a day and not miss it.

Aidan: That's not my style. See you. In fact, you know, I will say it. It strikes me odd that your mother would want so many pictures of her daughter doing "Britney gone wild on the beach." But I guess it doesn't really matter, does it? As long as you keep it in the family.

Erica: My goodness, does everything have to be so complicated? I mean, magnetic north and true north. I have a compass, and I'm still lost.

Jack: Not with true love, you're not. That's why we have each other -- so we can stand a good watch and make any corrections we need to make if we get off course.

Erica: As we did when we promised never to interfere in our impossibly adult children's lives again?

Jack: [Irish brogue] That was a yar piece of navigation, that was.

Erica: Certainly freed us up to concentrate on other things.

Jack: [Normal voice] Yes, didn't it, though? Hey, I have a present for you to replace the one I drowned in orange juice.

Erica: Oh, Jack. You trust me, you trust me not to torture Kendall with this?

Jack: Yeah, I guess do. Come here, you.

Erica: That reminds me -- I am due east northeast --

Jack: Yeah, that would be kind of --

Erica: At my studio to work on my TV show. What about you?

Jack: Well, I guess I'll drop by the office, check in with Livia, and just in general find out what's been going on in the real world while I've been in paradise with my bride.

Erica: Ok. You do that, and I promise that I will wait for Kendall to reach out and touch me.

Jack: You got it.

Erica: Ok.

Kendall: J.R., my revenge trip on Ethan is over.

J.R.: You're getting soft.

Kendall: No, I'm getting smart. Payback is exhausting. I've had enough of it, so has Ethan, so has his father.

J.R.: I'm not done until I get Chandler Enterprises back in control.

Kendall: Fine, great. Knock yourself out.

J.: I'm not walking away from this. I want you with me when I get Chandler Enterprises. I want Ethan left hanging. I'm not going to compromise one for the other. I want it all!

Kendall: Ok, fine, so have it all. Just don't include me or Zach.

J.R.: You're making a big mistake, you know that?

Kendall: No, no. My mistake was thinking I can do love. The fallout from that one insane choice almost tore me to pieces. So from now on, I am steering clear of anything that even remotely resembles it.

J.R.: So basically, what you're saying is screw me?

Kendall: I'm sorry, J.R. I'm sorry, but my mind is made up.

J.R.: No, you don't get to do this, Kendall! You don't get to bail on me! We had a plan, we had a deal, and a sweet one at that. There's been way too much time invested just to kick this away.

Kendall: J.R., listen, calm down. Relax, ok? This is not worth it.

J.R.: No, no, something happened to you in Boca. Somebody messed with your head, and it looks like somebody needs to straighten you out.

Kendall: Ok, well, that someone's not going to be you. Now, just back off!

J.R.: No, you don't get to shut me out!

Kendall: Yeah, well, you don't get to rule my life!

J.R.: And you're not done with this until I say that you're done!

Zach: Excuse me. You got a problem with my wife?

J.R.: Congratulations on a long life and a happy marriage.

Zach: What I asked you was if you had a problem with my wife.

J.R.: No, I don't. We were just simply having a confrontation about this whole situation over Cambias.

Zach: Do you know what he's talking about?

Kendall: Um -- Zach, honey, I think J.R. is referring to you dropping the lawsuit against Ethan and letting him keep all the companies and the cash.

Zach: Oh. What about it?

J.R.: You're really going to go down without a fight? I mean, because I can [British accent] Practically hear Ethan laughing his scones off. [Normal voice] Caving on a court date before it's set?

Zach: Makes us look bad, huh?

J.R.: Makes you look like the worst. Ethan can roll right over you. And then this reputation that you have as a no-prisoners business guy that takes a hit -- you're going to have vendors and employees thinking that they can rob you blind, because you fold without a fight.

Kendall: Careful, the showgirls might tie you up and hold you hostage for a pay raise.

J.R.: Yeah, well, I really don't know a whole lot about the casino business. But it's going to say that Zach Slater can be squeezed.

Zach: Hmm. So what should I do to keep people from calling me a coward? Should I just reinstate the lawsuit and take Cambias away from Ethan?

J.R.: Yeah. I mean, that's your word, but, yes. I think so.

Zach: What do you think, honey? Junior on to something?

Ryan: Well, we spent enough time in Ryan's world.

Maria: Yeah, but Ryan's world sounds like it's getting good. I'm happy for you.

Ryan: Thanks. What about Maria’s world?

Maria: Oh, Maria’s world? Yeah. Lots of changes there, and -- especially with Zach marrying your sister-in-law.

Ryan: Yeah. And I can't believe Kendall actually went through with it. You realize it's -- Maria, it's strictly business thing.

Maria: No, no, don't even go there. I don't care. I've got so much going on in my life right now that Zach and Kendall are almost comic relief.

Ryan: Yeah. Well, I told Kendall they deserve each other.

Maria: Well, what we deserve and what we get are usually two wildly different things. But right now I'm actually too busy trying to take your advice.

Ryan: Really?

Maria: Mm-hmm.

Ryan: And is that a good thing?

Maria: It's a very good thing. You're the one who told me to get my rear in gear and climb my way out of this muck.

Ryan: Well, you had a lot of help getting yourself into that muck.

Maria: Maybe, but I'm really the only one who can get myself out. And I'm doing that by focusing on what's the most important, and that's my kids. And I'm really, really trying to keep that focus positive right now.

Ryan: That sounds like good advice for me, too. I mean, the part about being positive.

Maria: Please, I'm not the one to be giving advice, but -- but I'm happy for you. Good luck.

Ryan: Yes, you, too.

Maria: Thank you.

Greenlee: No matter what, I love Ryan more than anyone or anything. And you have to know what a change that is for me. I used to be the most selfish bitch you ever crossed the street to get away from.

Dr. Madden: Well, we all tend to be our own worst critics.

Greenlee: I'm not exaggerating. I was completely self-absorbed. It was Greenlee's world, and you were lucky to live in it. And that changed for a lot of reasons. But the biggest reason is Ryan. Like, there is this thing that I always did -- passing a store window and checking out my look. And after I knew that I wanted a baby with Ryan, I was passing Lacey’s big display window. And I did my usual hair flip and half smile. And I saw myself reflected back -- with a little girl. And I was holding her hand. My little girl. And Ryan was on the other side of her, holding her other hand. Our little family. Doctor, I ache for her, or for him. Not just for myself, but for Ryan. But now he's had this damn procedure because he thinks his DNA is poison.

Dr. Madden: Well, as far as I know, genetic mapping has failed to isolate the evil chromosome.

Greenlee: Something you need to know about my husband -- he is the most loyal, wonderful, unselfish man on the planet. But he's got it in his head that bringing another Lavery into the world would be like releasing the dogs of the damned. I want to prove to this amazing man that ending his chances for a child was wrong. And I can do that with your help. I can present him with the most beautiful, well-behaved, nonhomicidal child.

Dr. Madden: You really want this baby, and for the most unselfish reasons.

Greenlee: Thank you. Thank you for understanding. Will you help me save my husband?

Jamie: I'm just tired of everybody trying to get into our business. Let's just get married now.

Babe: God, I'd love to hear you propose. But what about the money?

Jamie: I haven't changed my mind.

Babe: Yeah, but you marry me, and your ticket to med school -- it goes bye-bye, and J.R. laughs himself all the way to the bank.

Jamie: J.R. wins if I don't make you Mrs. James Martin.

Babe: Just think of everything you could do with Phoebe's money.

Jamie: Enough about the money.

Babe: You know what? It's kind of hard to ignore. I found this while I was cleaning.

Jamie: J.R. brought it to taunt me.

Babe: It's a really nice doctor's bag. Maybe you could put it to use.

Jamie: You know, I look at that, and all I see is trouble. People will try just about anything to kick us to the curb.

Babe: And by people, you mean J.R.

Jamie: Babe, it's time to make our lives, our decision, permanent. Make an honest woman out of you. The custody courts will love it.

Babe: And we decided to wait six months, and I mean it.

Jamie: Nothing's going to change between now and then.

Babe: Then look at the bright side. There's no difference. And just look at it. We're already halfway there.

[To get Aidan’s attention, Amanda runs into the water.]

Man: Oh, my God, I think that girl is drowning!

Amanda: Help! Help! Help! Help me!

Dr. Madden: Mrs. Lavery, you've presented me with quite the challenge.

Greenlee: Make it easy on yourself. Say yes.

Dr. Madden: You see, most of our clients are single. If you were single, this would be very different. But the fact is you're married, and not as happily as you'd like to be at the moment. But I get the sense that you wish the marriage to continue.

Greenlee: Oh, with all my heart, forever and ever.

Dr. Madden: We help to create children here. We have to consider the families into which they'll be born.

Greenlee: Well, ours is great. My dad is Jackson Montgomery, the former DA and all around champion of truth and justice. And he's newly married to my stepmom, Erica Kane, an amazing woman in her own right. She and Ryan share a very tight bond. And then there's my brother, Reggie, and my sister, Lily, and my stepsister Bianca. Kendall -- never mind about her. But believe me, this baby would be loved and cared for like you wouldn't believe.

Dr. Madden: You're missing a key member of this family. You see, Mrs. Lavery, in all discussions of a case like this, the husband and the wife -- they must both be part of the dialogue.

Greenlee: Well, Dr. Madden, I explained, this a uniquely unique situation. If it weren't for his homicidal maniac brother and the rest of his abusive family, Ryan would be sitting right here, signing off on this deal.

Dr. Madden: Well, you see, I only have your word for that. The problem is contracts would be broken. I'd be opening myself up to all sorts of litigation.

Greenlee: Well, I'll waive whatever you want. You write it, I'll sign it.

Dr. Madden: It's not your signature that would be required. It would be your husband's. And quite frankly, the action that he's taken to eliminate the possibility of children -- well, frankly, that speaks for itself.

Greenlee: I want to give this to my husband. I want him to see how good he is. He has so much love to give. I want him to believe that --

Dr. Madden: I'm so sorry. Without your husband's signature, there's absolutely nothing that I can do.

Greenlee: Well, I could forge it.

Dr. Madden: Oh, please, that's totally out of the question. I'd have to meet with your husband. He would have to be here in this office, and even then, it would be a legal nightmare. I'm so very sorry. I can't help you.

Greenlee: Dr. Madden, you have no idea with whom you're dealing. But you will find out.

Kendall: Zach, honey, I've heard J.R.'s opinion, and I think it's a bunch of BS.

Zach: Elaborate, please.

Kendall: Well, I don't think anyone's going to care if you don't go after Ethan. I mean, no one's going to mistake you for some wussy pushover. You are Zach Slater, and the name Zach Slater will always carry its own weight. So leave the payback to J.R. We've got much better things to do with our time.

Zach: Well, my better half has spoken. What she says goes.

J.R.: If I hadn't had such a pathetic day already, I would stay here and argue with you. But you two have already lost your minds, haven't you?

Zach: Stop by the casino sometime, ok?

J.R.: Maybe one day. Might be a Monday, might be a Tuesday -- I don't know when. But Ethan’s going to come in there, and he's going to grind you to powder. He's going to blow you away. But when he does, I'll be there to blow him away. Thanks.

Zach: We showed him, huh? Uh-oh. What did I do wrong, snookums?

Kendall: You showed up, and you saved me, damn you.

Man: We'll get help.

Aidan: Yeah. There's a phone just around the corner. You're going to be all right. You're going to be all right. You're not going to drown on me. You're not going to drown on me. Thank God.

[After listening for breathing, Aidan pinches Amanda’s nose and blows into her mouth.]

Aidan: Stay with me. Stay with me.

[After a couple of breaths, Amanda begins to kiss Aidan.]

Zach: I didn't come here to save you from J.R. I know you don't need saving.

Kendall: When did you get back from Boca?

Zach: I imagine probably the same time you did. It's a little silly taking separate flights.

Kendall: Worked for me.

Zach: I got some papers for you to sign. Casino business.

Kendall: Ok, right after we go over the marriage ground rules.

Zach: It's in the prenup.

Kendall: Yeah, well, these are my rules. I don't need you to protect me, ok? You're not my hero, you're not my savior. So the next time you walk into something that's none of your business, just walk out like it's none of your business, and please leave me the hell alone.

Erica: Oh, hallelujah! Hallelujah! I am so proud of you, Kendall. Oh, my goodness, finally you see this man for the -- the loser and the user he is. Come on, why don't you just throw that gaudy engagement ring back in his face, and let's go celebrate.

Zach: You didn't bring a gift, did you? That's ok. Can't have been easy to come up here and congratulate us on our marriage.

Kendall: It's true, Mother. Zach and I aren't a match made in heaven, but we're just as married as you and Jackson.

Jack: Well, Ryan. So how's Greenlee? I've left a few messages. She hasn't gotten back -- hasn't gotten back to me. Where is she? Look, Ryan, I think Greenlee's time in Florida was just what she needed. Time with her family, a little laughter. I think she really needed to get the hell away from --

Ryan: Get away from me? Is that what you were going to say? Just shut up, Jack, because I've heard it! I've heard you rant, I've heard your top reasons why Greenlee shouldn't be married to a Lavery. Well, now you sit down and you listen to me, because I have taken care of it.

Simone: What?

Greenlee: Simone --

Simone: Yeah?

Greenlee: Let's review. You're a crucial member of the Fusion team, the only one who can get the icemaker to behave, and my friend -- not necessarily in that order. Agreed?

Simone: Ok, I confess. I ate the last pint of jamocha almond fudge, all right?

Greenlee: Forget that. You're onboard when I need your help?

Simone: Well, you keep posting my bail, I'm your puppet.

Greenlee: Good. I need you to help me steal something. Something big, something important.

Simone: Oh, God help me. What is it?

Greenlee: My husband's sperm.

>> On the next "All My Children" --

Zach (to Erica who hauls off and slaps him): Lay it on me.

Woman (handing a key to Ryan): This is for you.

Jack: This is how you're taking care of my daughter, Ryan?

Ethan: I don't kick a man when he's down.

J.R.: Well, good. Then let's discuss what we're going to do about Kendall.

Kendall (to Simone and Greenlee): I'm interrupting something. The question is, what?

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