All My Children Transcript Tuesday 12/17/02
By Suzanne
proofread by Alicia
>> Previously on "All My Children" --
Adam: Counseling!
Liza: What?
Adam: Counseling. If we can't help ourselves, let's -- we'll get somebody else to help us for us.
Frank: I shot that video. I filmed your brother O.D.'ing.
Greenlee: Are you saying that we could really make this work? Our going into business together?
Aidan: Search for the bullet. When you find it, you can just take it out. You can do this. Come on.
Greenlee: Ok, now, in order for this partnership to succeed, we have to evaluate our strengths and how we can best serve the company.
Kendall: Fair enough.
Greenlee: Ok, I've got the social background, the connections, the business know-how. You've got a way with Petey Cortlandt.
Kendall: Very funny. Listen, I was this close to getting Boyd to jump ship.
Greenlee: Ok, we don't need Erica’s leftovers to succeed.
Kendall: Boyd is the top guy with R&D. He's developed this new formula for our new products that we'd kill for.
Greenlee: No, we don't need him, ok? I'm perfectly capable of creating my own line.
Kendall: We are capable. Our own line.
Greenlee: You know what I mean.
Kendall: Yes, I do. That's why Palmer's people are drawing up a nice, tight legal agreement for us to sign.
Greenlee: You know, Palmer's interest in you is fascinating, but let's stick to business.
Kendall: I am talking business.
Greenlee: Ok, your attempt to get Boyd failed, so let's move on.
Kendall: Ok, fine. Product development -- what we need is a product.
Greenlee: No, what we need is high-saturation marketing.
Kendall: You mean like advertising?
Greenlee: Yes, advertising.
Kendall: We have nothing to sell.
Greenlee: You know what? Your ignorance may charm Palmer Cortlandt, but it really irritates me.
Kendall: So you want to advertise nothing?
Greenlee: I take it you've got a problem with that?
Jake: What have you got in here? Gold bars? Rock collection? What is it?
Mia: Free weights. It's graduated. It's just -- they're 25 pounds. That's it.
Jake: You're kidding me. I tell you, I'm not even going to yell right now, all right? It is time for cappuccino!
Mia: Good. I think you should rest a little.
Jake: Mmm. Whew. You know what? These are going to sit here until I move them back there, so I might as well just do it now.
Mia: All right.
[Knock on door]
Jake: Oh.
Mia: And I'll just get that, and I'm sure the door is not too heavy for me.
Jake: Oh!
Frank: Hey. Hi. I came by to say hello to Jake.
Mia: Oh, good, good. You can treat his hernia.
Frank: His what?
Mia: Come in.
Jake: No, no, no. I'm fine, I'm fine.
Frank: Oh.
Jake: So --
Frank: I just came over to say good-bye.
Jake: Good-bye?
Frank: I can't stay in Pine Valley.
Adam: I'm ready.
Liza: What are you doing?
Adam: I'm just telling you I was ready.
Liza: You -- you want to give me a heart attack or something?
Adam: Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it. I'm just trying to keep it light, that's all. So, you've lined up marriage counselors from out of town?
Liza: Not one practice is within 50 miles of Pine Valley.
Adam: Good.
Liza: I'm surprised they were all willing to come here and be interviewed.
Adam: If they want the position, they'll go wherever we tell them.
Liza: You know, we're not hiring a gardener.
Adam: Really? What's the difference? Oh, right. This crew sits around grunting and scratching their heads instead of doing any real work. Lucky for them, we're hiring them right before Christmas.
Liza: You know, therapists don't accept gifts and bonuses.
Adam: Oh, not from people with little money and no taste, no. But from us, they'll expect it.
Liza: You know, I was an idiot to think that you would go through with this.
Adam: Liza, what are you -- what are you doing?
Liza: You know what I'm doing? I am canceling every single appointment.
[Aidan groans]
Maria: Aidan? Aidan? Oh, my God. Thank God you're alive. I thought for sure I’d killed you.
Adam: All right, Liza, I stand by my word. I will accept counseling.
[doorbell rings]
Adam: I'll do whatever it takes to save our marriage.
Winifred: Mr. and Mrs. Chandler --
Man: Yes, yes, here I am. Right on time, I believe. Dr. Enoch Black. And you must be Mrs. Chandler.
Adam: And I must be Mr. Chandler.
Dr. Black: Indeed.
Liza: Shouldn't we be dealing with the present?
Dr. Black: After we banish the demons of the past.
Adam: But won't rehashing all of that sort of bring up some bad feelings --
Dr. Black: Are you questioning me?
Adam: No, but we've both committed grievous sins. Liza's not the sole victim.
Liza: I never said I was.
Adam: Well, I just don't want Dr. Black to think it's all one-sided.
Liza: Ooh, well, all right.
Adam: All right, she tricked me into marrying her.
Liza: You know, I didn't hold a gun to your head.
Adam: I didn't interrupt when you were talking.
Liza: Yes, you did!
Dr. Black: You did. She's correct. Continue, Mr. Chandler.
Liza: Well, you know, when our marriage ended --
Dr. Black: You aren't married?
Adam: Well, no, we're married now, but we were divorced before.
Liza: And when our marriage ended the first time --
Adam: Then it ended the second time.
Liza: You're interrupting again. You know, I really -- I wanted a child, and I had a friend of mine who was willing to be the donor.
Adam: Jake wasn't right for you.
Liza: I wasn't after Jake!
Adam: No, just his sperm! Is that any way to create a life?
Dr. Black: One of many. Continue.
Liza: Well, Adam was adamant about being the child's father.
Adam: It was a --
Liza: So much so, that he thought that buying this fertility clinic and switching the sperm samples was somehow a humanitarian act.
Adam: It was a noble impulse. It proved my love.
Liza: No, it was only proving that you were a control freak. Dr. Black, where are you going?
Dr. Black: I'm sorry, but I really don't think I can help you.
Jake: You've only been here for a few months.
Mia: Are you transferring to another hospital or something?
Frank: I'm quitting. Medicine's not for me.
Jake: All right, listen -- Frank, when I first became a doctor, I questioned whether or not I did it for me or for my father. All right, did Angie say something to trigger this or what?
Frank: No, no, mom's great. You know, I'm just more like my father, that's all.
Jake: What's that mean?
Frank: You know dad. He was always -- God, he had his wild days. He was always more on edge than mom was.
Jake: They don't come any better than Jesse Hubbard. What's this all about?
Frank: Look, I just don't deserve to be a doctor, ok?
Jake: Ok, just hang on a minute, all right? Just sit down. What can I get you to drink, huh?
Frank: I got a lot to do. Sorry.
Mia: You know, wait a minute. You can't just walk out of here like nothing matters except what you want to do.
Frank: Really? Watch me. Ok, I am a pro at "me, me, me, I come first." Everyone else can just --
Jake: Frank, hold on. Where is this coming from? Why don't you come back in here and talk to us.
Frank: All right.
Jake: Come on.
Frank: I guess I owe you guys more than a see-you-later.
Mia: Yeah. So what -- what happened?
Frank: Simone and I broke up.
Jake: All right, well, the two of you haven't been together that long.
Mia: It's really no reason to just toss your career, Frank.
Frank: It's not that we broke up. It's the reason why.
Mia: I think we need a little more than that.
Jake: Yeah.
Frank: Mia, you remember what we -- when you and I were together, you remember what I was like.
Mia: Yeah, you were totally into your filmmaking.
Jake: All right, so now your focus is medicine. Does Simone -- does she feel competitive with this?
Frank: Mia used to say that I would film my own death if I could.
Mia: Frank, I was angry, ok? I exaggerated.
Frank: You were right. I wish I had filmed my own death because what I did was much worse. I kept the film rolling on a guy who O.D.'d.
Liza: Well, after it was proven that Adam was successful in switching the sperm samples and he was the father of my child, my mother locked him in his own safe room.
Woman: Well, hardly an adequate punishment.
Adam: Hardly adequate? I was in --
Liza: It wasn't really a punishment. You see, my mother wanted him under lock and key until our second divorce was final.
Woman: They say three's the charm.
Liza: Yeah. Well, anyway, Adam’s twin brother dressed up as Adam and came to the divorce proceedings.
Woman: A twin? Do you do this trick often?
Adam: I'm not saying a word.
Liza: Well, Stuart -- Adam’s twin brother -- he rarely becomes embroiled in our problems.
Woman: Mr. Chandler?
Adam: What?
Woman: Why don't you continue your marital saga for me?
Adam: All right. The next low point in my life was Liza and her ex-lover trying to take over my company.
Liza: Tad is my friend!
Adam: Oh, you and Tad have a sexual history dating back to the mid Mesozoic!
Liza: Tad was only trying to help me get back at you for becoming the father of my child!
Adam: Having me committed to a psychiatric facility in front of my board of directors was below the belt!
Woman: I will not encourage this salacious mendacity.
Liza: Does that mean you won't counsel us?
Woman: You're beyond counseling. I'm sorry, but I can't help you.
Greenlee: Kendall, Kendall, Kendall. I have one word for you -- "Smash." Ever heard of it?
Kendall: Yeah, they're only the most successful jeans company in the world.
Greenlee: Yeah, well, all Smash had when they started was inspiration. They launched a campaign that made millions of people want their product before they even knew what it was.
Kendall: Yeah, that was a fluke.
Greenlee: No, it was genius. And we're going to follow in their footsteps. We're going to have a bazillion orders before our prototypes are complete.
Kendall: Ok, working with you is one thing, but I will not share a prison cell.
Greenlee: What are you talking about?
Kendall: Greenlee, this is far beyond cooking the books. This would be cooking the entire company, which only exists in your head.
Greenlee: To achieve big, dream big. Little thoughts and fears are for little people.
Kendall: Ok, and common sense are for common people. I don't care. We need a product first.
Greenlee: No, we need publicity first.
Kendall: Fine. Well, looks like we've reached a stalemate.
Greenlee: You know, you have about as much insight and daring as a rag doll.
Simone: You know, you're starting a company and you don't know you can have both?
Adam: So I went into the boardroom pretending to be Stuart.
Liza: His twin brother.
Adam: Does it bother you that I have a twin?
Man: Should it?
Adam: I don't know. But, anyway, I was impersonating Stuart so I could tell the board what I’d been -- happened to Adam, that he'd been locked in the safe room.
Liza: But it was really Stuart dressed as Adam in there.
Adam: Right, right, I was impersonating Stuart so that I could tell the board of directors what Tad and Liza had done to Adam, locking him in the safe room.
Liza: But, see, I already told Tad that it was Adam dressed as Stuart in there.
Adam: And then she shared the secret with the entire board of directors.
Liza: Well, they needed to know that you were trying to snow them.
Adam: And then she convinced the board of directors that I should be locked up in Oak Haven, which I was.
Liza: So what do you think?
Adam: Can you help us?
Man: I can't help you. I can't even follow you.
Maria: My God, I was so afraid that you weren't even going to make it through the night. Everything was so crazy and makeshift, and trying to take out the bullet, I just thought I’d made everything worse. I don't know what happened.
Aidan: Stop. Stop while I have some skin left.
Maria: Ok, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, I was just -- I was so scared all night.
Aidan: I would trust you with my life any time, Maureen. Ah --
Maria: Ok, well, if you can trust me, you can trust me with what happened. Who shot you?
Winifred: Dr. Lysis-- Lys-- um, Dr. Schwartz.
Dr. Schwartz: Please, call me Lysistrata.
Adam: Lysistrata?
Lysistrata: Being on a first-name basis usually keeps older clients more at ease.
Adam: She was looking at both of us.
Lysistrata: Well, if you prefer someone your own age --
Liza: Oh, no, no. We've been that route, thanks.
Lysistrata: Then let's begin. Relaxation helps me process more quickly.
Adam: So, after Liza embezzled large sums of money from our company so she could run away with our daughter, I decided it was time to make her believe that her tumor had recurred. So I started doing, you know, flickering lights, some mind games --
Liza: Yeah, you know, the usual. But it worked.
Adam: For a while.
Liza: Of course, when I figured out what he was doing, I started playing up the crazy angle.
Adam: Are you awake?
Lysistrata: How could I sleep? You're so entertaining.
Adam: We're very serious about getting help here.
Liza: Uh, yes. Do you have any colleagues?
Lysistrata: Well, no one's as good as I am.
Adam: But you're sorry, you can't help us, right?
Lysistrata: Of course I can help you. I know precisely what you need.
Frank: Documentaries are all about distance, about being objective. You don't get involved. You don't feel. Just record everything on camera. So when this guy started O.D.'ing, I was, like, "hey, I'm a pro," right? And I kept the camera on -- through the sweats, the convulsions. I stood back and I did nothing but let the film roll.
Jake: You weren't alone with him, were you?
Frank: No. He had a bunch of drugged-out pals propping him up.
Jake: And what did everyone else do?
Frank: Nothing. They were too stoned to do anything but freak.
Mia: Frank --
Frank: They called an ambulance. It was too late.
Mia: What do you think you could have done?
Jake: You weren't practicing medicine at that time.
Frank: I was clear-headed. I was capable. I could've done something, but all I did was look for the next angle, for the best shot.
Mia: So you told this to Simone, and she won't forgive you?
Jake: And you won't forgive yourself?
Frank: I didn't have to confess. She saw the tape.
Mia: Oh.
Frank: Yeah. The guy that I didn't lift a finger to help was her brother, Anthony.
Jake: Zeke McMillan had a son?
Frank: He's not dead. Anthony's in a coma. Anthony's a vegetable, and nothing will ever change.
Mia: Frank, you were awfully young. You probably didn't know how serious it was.
Frank: Oh, I knew exactly what I was doing. I was stone-cold sober, and I could've made the difference between Anthony being a regular guy or him being curled up in some fetal position, getting three meals a day through an I.V.
Jake: Ok, Frank. You screwed up.
Mia: You know, sometimes we learn from the past, and then we can change.
Jake: Exactly. Mia's right.
Frank: Don't you do this, Jake. All right, you can't ignore this. You're the Chief of Staff. What if there's another emergency and I freeze up? Ok, I stand against the walls and watch the whole thing unfold?
Mia: Frank, you wouldn't do that now. Come on.
Jake: You have done fine in the E.R. What about that case the other day? That was an O.D. case that you took over.
Frank: The one I almost got written up on? Yeah.
Jake: Well, now I understand why McMillan was all upset. He took it personal.
Frank: Jake, I made it personal when I watched his son O.D.
Jake: You made a mistake, Frank. We all have.
Frank: Not like me.
Jake: All right, listen, life is about second chances. Why don't you give yourself a chance?
Frank: Because I don't deserve one, ok? I haven't done a single thing in my life that I can be proud of or that's even a decent excuse for me to be on this planet.
Mia: I can think of one, Frank. You've done something -- something wonderful -- only no one ever told you.
Kendall: Wait, wait, wait, wait. Tell me -- tell me what you meant. We can have both?
Greenlee: Release that eavesdropper.
Simone: You know, I was trying not to listen.
Greenlee: You know, she has nothing to add to our conversation.
Kendall: Simone, join us.
Greenlee: Why are you doing this?
Simone: You know, I've got problems of my own. Thank you.
Greenlee: Do gin and tonics in the afternoon solve them?
Simone: Oh --
Kendall: Would you just stop sniping? Simone, we've reached a standoff.
Simone: Mm-hmm.
Kendall: So tell me what you meant just now.
Simone: All right, you're out to beat Enchantment. What does Enchantment sell?
Kendall: Cosmetics.
Greenlee: Erica Kane.
Simone: Erica cannot be separated from her product, right? She defines it.
Kendall: Well, at least she's got products, plenty of them. But what do we do? I mean, should we sink our money into advertising before product development?
Simone: No, you put your money into production and you get your advertising free.
Greenlee: Brilliant. Good-bye.
Simone: You know what? I just lost the love of my life. I don't need abuse from you.
Kendall: Wait, wait. Simone, just stay. Just for a little while.
Greenlee: If Simone stays, I go.
Aidan: So I was at my car. I felt this gun in my side, and he demanded my wallet, and --
Maria: And, what, you refused?
Aidan: No. I went to give it to the guy. But I couldn't find it.
Maria: So he shot you for that?
Aidan: He must have been angry. He must have thought I was yanking his chain or something. Anyhow, he just pushed me to the ground and he took off.
Maria: You know, I may have lost my memory, but I didn't totally lose my grasp of reality. If this was really a mugging, why didn't you let me take you to the hospital last night? Why would you settle for this totally inept, you know, do-it-yourself medicating?
Aidan: The hospital would only -- they'd just call the police. They have to.
Maria: So what?
Aidan: So -- so they'd just get me down to the station for a lot of questioning, waste my time. They're only going to drop the case.
Maria: But Anna’s just been reinstated as the Chief of Police. Of course she would see this to a conviction. Unless there was some really good reason that they would -- unless there was a really good reason, like that her husband did this. Oh, my God, was this -- this was David. Did David do this because we went down there and scared him at the cabin? Did he try to kill you?
Aidan: It wasn't David’s voice.
Maria: Aidan, when somebody tries to save your life, you don't jerk them around. So if it was not David who tried to shoot you last night, then who did pull the trigger?
Adam: You know what we need?
Lysistrata: Sex. Are you having it?
Adam: Are you advising?
Lysistrata: Are you two sleeping together?
Liza: Oh, um -- you know, it's been a while since we've shared a bedroom.
Adam: Actually, we've been sleeping in separate wings of the house.
Lysistrata: But don't your children find that upsetting?
Adam: No, our children are just fine.
Lysistrata: Oh. Is he kidding?
Liza: Colby has had reoccurring nightmares, and J.R. has been very depressed lately.
Adam: That is not because of our trouble.
Lysistrata: Oh, yeah, I bet they just love being caught up in your war.
Adam: You said you know what we need.
Lysistrata: Liza, take your daughter and move out tonight. Your son J.R. can stay with you.
Adam: You really know how to pick 'em, lady.
[Adam laughs]
Adam: God.
Mia: You have a son. We had a baby. We did, Frank. You and I -- we had a baby. A little boy. He's 5 years old now.
Frank: You -- you never, never said that you were pregnant.
Mia: No, but I was. Only we weren't ready to be parents. I mean, this was, like, five years ago.
Frank: You never told me.
Mia: I know. Maybe I should have, but you were just -- you were just completely obsessed with filmmaking, and -- I mean, come on, really, what kind of parents would we have been?
Frank: Where is he?
Mia: Oh, he has a wonderful family. They adopted him.
Frank: Uh-huh. What's his name?
Mia: It's William. His name is William.
Frank: So, um -- all this time when we saw each other again, you didn't say anything to me?
Mia: Well, I was just kind of waiting for the right time to tell you. You know, I didn't know.
Frank: And this is it? This is what's supposed to make me feel better?
Mia: Well, I -- I thought that --
Frank: Mia, you tell me that I have a child that I don't even know about, that you gave away five years ago to complete strangers? What were you thinking? Mia, what kind of messed-up person does something like that?
Greenlee: She stays, I go.
Kendall: See you around. I want to hear what she has to say.
Greenlee: I will not be taken in by her again.
Kendall: Greenlee, what if Simone has an idea we can use?
Greenlee: I'll faint.
Kendall: Well, sit down just in case. Come on, this isn't costing us anything.
Greenlee: For the good of the company, I'll listen.
Kendall: Good. Great. All righty, here. There you go. Now, explain to us about this free advertising concept.
Simone: Thank you, Kendall. I did a story on Guerrilla Marketing a couple of years ago.
Kendall: Well, how does that apply to us?
Simone: Well, you manage to get your face in front of the public without paying for it.
Kendall: How?
Simone: You know, publicity stunts, stealth campaigns, and newsworthy events -- whatever it takes to get your name in print and your face on camera.
Kendall: I don't see how that would fly.
Greenlee: How could the daughter of an infamous actor and Erica Kane be so imagination-free?
Kendall: I'll ignore that slam for now. So, do you really think this Guerrilla thing could work?
Simone: Oh, yeah.
Greenlee: I know it can because I've done it.
Maria: Look, I don't buy your mugger scenario.
Aidan: Look, you can buy what you want. It was a guy's voice, but it hasn't done any good. Look, I've got to run, in a manner of speaking.
Maria: Are you crazy? You barely have the strength to breathe. You can't go anywhere. Aidan --
Aidan: I've got no choice.
Maria: Why? Why is that?
Aidan: Because if he knows that we are here or I am here, well, then that puts you in the line of fire.
Maria: Ok, that really doesn't jell with your mugger story because a mugger would be long gone by now.
Aidan: And what if your husband knows that I'm in your bed?
Maria: It doesn't matter. I can explain that. Look, you're not going to -- you can't go anywhere. You're not strong enough, Aidan. I don't care how macho you are.
Aidan: Excuse me. You've done a great job, doc. I could run a marathon. I'm serious.
Maria: Aidan -- Aidan! God, Aidan.
Adam: We are doing our best to keep our family together.
Lysistrata: And is anybody happy? Time to get real, Adam.
Adam: I am not going to give up my daughter on the advice of some underage throwback to the days of flower power.
Lysistrata: I'm not suggesting you give up anything except your need for control. Here, sit down. Now, both of you require time apart to re-establish your own independent identities. If you don't approach the rest of your life together on equal footing, then you're just wasting your time.
Adam: Whoa, whoa, wait. Excuse me, what is equal about me giving Colby to Liza?
Lysistrata: If the child stays with you, you'll use her to manipulate Liza.
Adam: Well, all right. Yes, I very likely would, but she'd use her, too.
Liza: Adam.
Adam: No, I'm not indicting you, I’m just saying that that's who we are, Liza. You know, why -- why do I have to give Liza control?
Lysistrata: You don’t. You're giving me control.
Adam: That'll be the day!
Liza: When do we start?
Adam: Wait a minute. You're not -- you're not choosing her?
Liza: No one else will work with us. You told me I could choose the therapist.
Adam: She's a schoolgirl, a hippie flake.
Liza: Listen, are you going to keep your promise? Yes or no?
Adam: All right! All right. Excuse me.
Liza: Ok.
Adam: Go on, go on. Take control.
Liza: Colby and I can move out right after Christmas.
Lysistrata: No. It has to be tonight.
Adam: Why? Why? Can someone please explain why?
Lysistrata: You want a happy, cohesive family unit?
Adam: If I didn't, you'd be out on your --
Liza: Adam!
Lysistrata: This is the best Christmas gift you can give yourselves, believe me. Now, call my office and we'll schedule our appointments. Nice meeting you, Liza.
Liza: Nice meeting you.
Lysistrata: And you, Adam.
Adam: Excuse me. What sort of a name is Lysistrata?
Lysistrata: My brother's name is Liberation.
Adam: Why? Because he escaped home as soon as he could crawl?
Lysistrata: Because he was raised free of the outmoded concept of male dominance.
Adam: We're doomed.
Lysistrata: Do you remember the feminist anti-war protestors of the 1960s?
Adam: Dimly, yes.
Lysistrata: Well, they carried around the sign saying, "girls say yes to boys who say no."
Adam: Is there a point to this?
Lysistrata: My mother carried one of those signs when she was 16. Bye.
Adam: Which proves exactly nothing!
Liza: Adam, "Lysistrata" -- the Greek comedy. Wives refused to have sex with their husbands until the men stopped waging war.
Adam: So she was -- she was named for blackmail.
Liza: Some would like to call it incentive. I have packing to do.
Adam: Lysistrata.
Frank: How could you cut me out like that?
Jake: All right, Frank, Frank, she was considering the child's welfare.
Frank: What about my welfare?
Mia: I didn't tell you -- I didn't tell you because I really didn't think you'd care.
Frank: Well, you were wrong.
Mia: Five years ago, Frank. I mean, five years ago, you would have been horrified.
Frank: I guess we'll never know, will we?
Mia: You were so wrapped up in your own world. Why would I think that you would be interested in a baby?
Frank: A baby? A baby? No, Mia -- my baby. Part of my mother, part of my father. Does he look like me?
Mia: I don't know, I don't know.
Jake: All right, listen, listen. Mia was the one that was carrying this child, and she's the one who made the decision for his best interest, his welfare.
Frank: Yeah, yeah. Well, it was wrong, ok? I have rights, too. Fathers have rights, too, you know?
Mia: You know, maybe if you had been the way that you are now back then, maybe things would have been a little different, Frank.
Frank: Maybe I would have been different, Mia, if I would have known that I had a child. You know, maybe I would've helped that kid in the alley, stopped him from O.D.'ing.
Jake: Ok, Frank, wait, you cannot blame Mia for that.
Frank: How do you know? How does anyone know what I would have done or what I would have become if I knew that I was going to be a father, if I knew I was a father? Things like that kind of shake up your priorities.
Mia: Yeah, well, not always, all right? I couldn't tell you anyway.
Frank: That is bull. You did what was easiest for you.
Greenlee: Of course, they were clueless about how to peddle Enchantment's fragrance, but I was sure that I could make people want it.
Simone: Uh-huh.
Kendall: There's nothing you can't do.
Greenlee: I know. And so I slipped into this marvelously sexy peignoir, and I went outside the shop and I mingled with the patrons.
Kendall: You ran around the mall in a nightgown?
Greenlee: Listen, you've been ambushed by those awful women who spray you with that noxious scent as you walk by.
Simone: Oh, yeah.
Kendall: You were one of them? That's sad.
Greenlee: No, no, no, I wasn't one of them. I was brilliant. I sprayed Leo and caused a small riot, but by the end of the madness, every single customer was stampeding to get Erica’s perfume.
Simone: Right. You made them think they had to have it.
Greenlee: Exactly.
Kendall: Ok, that's great, but we don't have bottles of anything for people to stampede for.
Greenlee: Would you stop worrying about product?
Simone: Yeah, that's not the point right now.
Greenlee: We have to sell us.
Simone: Mm-hmm.
Kendall: Us?
Simone: You. Both of you.
Kendall: Well, at least you two finally agree on something.
Greenlee: Simone just happens to be right this time.
Simone: Thank you.
Greenlee: We can do this, Kendall. I know we can.
Kendall: Ok, all right. I'll -- I'll consider doing this on one condition -- we invite Simone to join the company.
Singer: Silent night holy night
[pounding on door]
Singer: All is calm
[pounding]
Maria: Who is it?
Aidan: Maureen, run! Run!
[Maria screams]
Maria: Aidan, what is it?
Aidan: It must have been nothing.
Maria: You had a nightmare?
Aidan: Nightmares.
Maria: About the shooting?
Aidan: Yeah.
Maria: Lay back. Look, if you -- you might sleep better if you tell me everything you know about it.
Jake: Don't take this out on Mia.
Frank: She did it. She handed off my son. But that's ok. You know why? Times have changed.
Mia: No, Frank. Frank, please, don't interfere with it.
Frank: Taking an interest in my son is not interfering.
Mia: William has a family now.
Frank: He's got a father. He's got me!
Mia: He has the mom and dad who raised him.
Frank: They had no right to raise him, Mia, and they never would have if I would've known that he existed.
Jake: All right, Frank, listen, you came in here all upset about Simone and her brother -- a situation that you were powerless to change.
Frank: No, no, that has nothing to do with what Mia's done.
Jake: Don't mess around trying to fix something that doesn't need fixing.
Frank: Don't you tell me what to do with my son! Where is he, Mia? Where's William? Mia --
Jake: Frank --
Frank: Tell me. Where is my son?
Jake: Frank, back off.
Adam: Ah, there you are. Are you already for your slumber party?
Colby: Why aren't you coming, daddy?
Adam: Oh, um -- well, because I wouldn't be any fun. I have work to do.
Liza: Well, we'll be at the gatehouse if you need us.
Adam: I do need you. I always need you. Well, you be good, sweetheart.
Colby: Where's J.R.?
Adam: Well, I don't know. But I'm going to find him and I'll tell him where you are, and he'll come and play with you just as soon as he can, ok?
Liza: Come on, sweetie. We need to go. I hope this works.
Adam: So do I.
Kendall: Greenlee, we need a writer. If Simone joined us, that would free us up to do the brainstorming and everything.
Simone: Yes, but I’m not job hunting.
Greenlee: Is cocktail waitressing really that fulfilling?
Simone: It's flexible.
Kendall: Yeah, but this would be a lot more challenging.
Greenlee: For all of us.
Kendall: Does that mean you're in favor of Simone joining us?
Greenlee: Well, someone has to write copy and press releases and all that.
Simone: But, I mean, could we actually really --
Greenlee: The past is personal. This is strictly business if we can keep it that way.
Simone: I can.
Greenlee: So can I.
Simone: Fine.
Greenlee: Just never mention my father.
Simone: Fine.
Kendall: Great. Good. Ok -- um, excuse me, can we have three glasses of champagne, please? So -- so what was that you said earlier? You lost the love of your life?
Greenlee: What, again?
Simone: Ok, that falls under the heading of "personal."
Kendall: Whatever. Whatever. At least we don't have to put in our company bios.
Simone: Yes.
Kendall: So, look at us -- three young, hip, fantastic women -- none of whom can hold on to a man.
Greenlee: I happen to be a widow.
Simone: Yeah, and you know what? I gave Frank the boot.
Kendall: And I want that champagne.
Greenlee: Oh, stop feeling sorry for yourself. You have something going on with that Brit, don't you?
Kendall: Aidan? I'm never sure.
Maria: Aidan, I cannot help you if you don't confide in me.
Aidan: I won't let them hurt you.
Maria: What do you mean -- hurt me? Who wants to hurt me?
Aidan: They might if they --
Maria: Aidan, what -- who wants to hurt me? Oh, my God, Aidan, I know you know who shot you. Why won't you tell me?
>> On the next "All My Children" --
Hayley: The move to L.A. is off. We're going to stay right here.
Frank: You knew all about it, didn't you?
Liza: About what?
Frank: Keeping my son away from me.
Maria: I wish I could be the sister that you lost.
Edmund: Maria, are you there?