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One Life to Live Update Thursday 4/10/03
By Brandon
Pictures by Juanita
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So, what if there was an episode of "One Life to Live" in which lots of stuff was going on, but nothing was really happening? That's pretty much the boat we were all in on Thursday, and it made for the longest hour of the day. Honestly, if it hadn't been for my fascination with Robin Strasser's hair -- is it a wig? -- then there wouldn't have been an interesting second in this entire episode.
But let's talk it up anyhow.
Keri called RJ and he sensed that she is starting to have second thoughts about her playing-dead charade, so he lied to her that Antonio has already moved on and is already seeing somebody else. Listen, you know that anything that keeps Keri and that baby and this storyline out of my hair is fine by me, but seriously, does RJ think he's going to be able to keep this lie going forever? Anyway, at the diner, Carlotta happened upon Antonio staring longingly at a sonogram picture of the baby, and she urged him not to close his heart off completely -- that she understands he's in pain, but that he shouldn't shut out the possibility of finding love again.
OK, enough of that.
Cristian asked Natalie to marry him, and she was stunned and touched, but she turned him down, saying she wants to be his wife so badly, but that his mother still isn't crazy about her, and that one meal didn't really change much. She then told him that she's always dreamed about having a huge wedding, with all the decorations and all the details -- the flowers, the fancy dress, the long train, the works -- and he told her he'd make sure she gets all that she's ever wanted. After he promised to talk to Carlotta, she took his ring and put it on a chain around her neck.
So the next morning, Cris went to the diner to see Carlotta and Antonio, and he told them that he had big news for them: he asked Natalie to marry him last night. Carlotta's jaw dropped so hard that it practically bounced off the tile floor, and Antonio was equally stunned, and asked his brother flat out if he had lost his mind. Cris insisted that he's deeply in love with Natalie, and Antonio reminded him that he's only been seeing her for a few months, and that he went out with Jen for years prior to that. (Actually, it was just over one year, Antonio, it just felt like longer.) He also reminded Cris that Natalie's family is going through hell right now, and that maybe something this big isn't the best idea just yet. So then Cris reminded Antonio about how he had the phenomenal sense to fall for RJ Gannon's daughter and how he hasn't exactly had the best track record either in the romance department. Cris then told both of them that Natalie turned him down, simply because his family hasn't warmed to her yet despite her best efforts, but that he loves her and intends to marry her no matter what they think or say.
Antonio finally relented, telling Cris that if two people are meant to be together, then nothing and no one should try to stop that. Carlotta, on the other hand, wasn't so generous: Natalie stopped by the diner later to see Carlotta, and she tried to give Natalie her blessing on the engagement, but she just couldn't bring herself to do it. Carlotta told Nat that she believes that Nat and Cris are moving entirely too fast, and that Cristian has bounced from person to person -- from Jessica to Roseanne to Jen and now to her -- and that -- get this, she actually had the gall to say this -- in her heart of hearts, she firmly believes that Cristian has never gotten over his feelings for Jessica.
At that point it was Natalie's jaw that bounced off the tile floor.
Antonio came back later and told Carlotta that this Cris/Natalie looks inevitable and she may as well get used to it, but Carlotta believed otherwise, telling him and Jessica, who dropped by to see Antonio, that she couldn't give Natalie her blessing, and that Natalie said she wouldn't marry Cris without it, so that's that.
Can you believe what a bitch she has turned into?
Back to Jessica, who was telling Viki about Antonio, which prompted Viki to ask her daughter about this budding friendship. Viki smells romance in the air between them, but Jessica insisted that they're just friends.
In the midst of all this, Natalie asked her mother and sister to meet her at a strange address -- a cozy-looking home -- and when they arrived, Natalie opened the door and told them, "Welcome home." She then explained that before Mitch took control of the Lord finances, she cashed out the remainder of her trust fund and paid the rent on this house for six months. Then she offered it to Viki and Jessica if they wanted it, and Viki accepted it enthusiastically on the condition that Natalie would live there as well. Natalie then told them that there was an apartment upstairs that was perfect for herself and Cris, complete with room for a studio for him. So they were all excited, and while they were hugging each other and celebrating, Jessica saw the engagement ring around her sister's neck and got Natalie to admit that Cris had proposed. Viki and Jessica both wished her well and told her they were extremely happy for her.
Natalie later lied to Cris that everything had gone swimmingly with Carlotta, and that she now had his mother's blessing. Looking awfully guilty, she accepted his marriage proposal.
Joey, meantime, got RJ to agree to go see Flash and the band and give them a second audition, after which he excitedly went to inform them that they had another chance to wow the club owner. Joey also gave Flash another bit of news regarding CJ -- a phone number. Flash was thrilled.
After he left though, she started coughing miserably and chugged down half a bottle of Robitussin, swearing to Riley -- who I think is terribly cute, by the way -- that she wasn't going to let a little cough blow their big chance.
So then later, after singing for RJ, he gave them a chance to perform their stuff at Capricorn.
Meanwhile, the lovebirds of Llanfair -- Mitch and Dorian -- opened the episode by laying a few more cards out on the table. Mitch told his new wife that he knows what she's up to. Dorian got a panicked look on her face, and then Mitch told her that he knows she married him not out of love, but out of a desire to be the mistress of Llanfair again. Dorian then told him that she's also aware he didn't marry her out of love, but out of a desire to stick it to Viki from yet another angle.
After Mitch went to bed, Dorian asked Lois to fix up one of the guest rooms, as that would be Dorian's sleeping quarters for the time being.
The next morning, Dorian paid a visit to RJ at Capricorn, and he razzed her about not getting an invite to her latest wedding. Dorian congratulated him on his new club, and expressed her sympathies on the Keri tragedy. She then asked him what he knows about the Lindsay situation, and he was surprised at her concern. She insisted that she was worried, but RJ didn't buy it, and asked her what she's up to. She danced around the subject, and he asked her if she needs anything. No, she told him, but when he was out of earshot, she added, "for now."
Mitch, meanwhile, woke up from a bizarre nightmare involving Victor, Viki, and Jessica, and in a paranoid state began screaming at poor Lois about something or other. I don't know, he thought she was trying to poison him or something. He then paid a visit to an antiques expert to ask for instructions on opening that strange box he unearthed in Llanfair's other secret room. The expert informed him that the box cannot be opened, and then went into some strange folklore about the box, about how it contains some uncontrollable power that can't be contained and that will destroy anybody whose possession it falls into. Mitch was intrigued.
And Viki paid a visit to Llanfair when she was sure that neither Dorian nor Mitch were around. She asked Lois to keep her eyes and ears open and to report to her anything that seems out of the ordinary. Lois told her that Dorian and Mitch aren't sharing a bedroom, but before Viki could pursue that one further, Dorian showed up. Viki covered by explaining that she had stopped by to give Lois her new contact information, in case anyone called looking for Viki, and Dorian seemed to buy it. After Viki left, Dorian noticed Mitch's blood -- from that nasty cut on his hand -- on the white floor in the foyer of Llanfair, and asked Lois to clean it up immediately. Dorian also noticed that there seemed to be a trail of blood, leading over to the staircase. She started looking at the wall beneath the stairs, wondering what Mitch was up to.