OLTL Update Friday 12/13/02

One Life to Live Update Friday 12/13/02

By Brandon
Pictures by Juanita



Yes indeed, another Friday, another pointless episode of "One Life to Live" -- a show that, hard to believe, actually used to be about something; a show that is now just coasting down the hill until the February arrivals of a new executive producer and a "new" head-writing team. Hopefully we can all hang in there until then; in the meantime, the tedium threatens to render us all comatose.

But bravely we press forward....

We got to see Seth's chiseled torso and ripped abs one more time today. (Trust me when I tell you that was the unquestionable highlight of this episode.) Jessica waited until he was asleep and then began plotting her escape so that she could get back to Llanview and see what in the hell is going on. And she was just almost out the door too... until the cell phone rang and woke Seth up. It was Viki calling to see if Jess was all right, and as Jess listened in from the bathroom, Seth told Viki that she knows about Natalie's marriage to Mitch but nothing else, and that he's making sure that she's safe. After they hung up, Seth asked Jessica what was going on, and Jess made up a story about how she wanted to take a bath and just relax. So when she thought Seth had gone back to sleep, she planned to try again to sneak out. And as she was leaving the room the second time, she found out that Seth wasn't asleep, and that he and his abs were ready to stop her all over again.

Meanwhile, Bo let Gabrielle in on the news that Mitch is alive and that Viki and Cristian have a plan to get Natalie away from him. Bo also finally relented and told her that he is helping them in an unofficial capacity. Gabrielle begged him to be careful

At the coffee house, Viki and Cristian discussed their plan to get Natalie to safety, and Viki reluctantly told Cris that Natalie isn't the only one that Mitch is after -- he's also keenly interested in Jessica. Viki didn't go into detail but just said that Jessica is going to need all the support she can get before it's all said and done, and Cris told her that Jess was his first love and that he'd always care about her.

Then Bo got Viki hooked up with a wire and she went over to Mitch's house, where Mitch had been trying to strike a deal with Natalie. It was basically this: help me find Jessica, and I'll let you divorce me. Natalie thought that Mitch's interest in Jessica was sexual and he denied that but didn't elaborate, and Natalie refused to take the deal, disgusted by the idea of exposing her sister to a "freak like you." As these two crazy lovebirds were getting into it all over again, Viki knocked on the door. I'm honestly not sure what the whole plan was here with the wire and all, but Bo and Cristian were waiting in the woods near the house and the general idea was to get Natalie out of the house and for Viki to get Mitch to say something incriminating.

So Viki tried to get Natalie to go take a walk or something, but both she and Mitch refused, much to Viki's chagrin. Natalie at first didn't want to leave Viki and Mitch alone together, and then when she finally agreed, Mitch wouldn't let her leave the house, so she went upstairs to her room. Once they were alone, Viki announced to Mitch that she had a deal for him: she was prepared to offer him whatever dollar amount he wanted in order to end this vendetta against her forever. "I've got my checkbook and everything," she added. "You're lying!!!" Mitch suddenly screamed out of nowhere. "You're lying to me!!!"

Anybody out there know the religious term for "Duh!"?

Meanwhile, somehow or other, Cris managed to sneak into the house and into Natalie's room, where they shared a tender, happy embrace.

Also, quickly, developments in the worst storyline in the history of the show. Evidently the baby's going to be fine for now -- Dr. Troy announced that yesterday, I forgot to tell you that, after getting a hold of Liz's medical reports from Chicago that revealed that she also has a defect on chromosome eight. But Antonio is suspicious nonetheless that he is little Stephanie's father. (I also forgot that part -- Keri told Liz she wants to name the baby after Steve, hence....) So he took his suspicions to Hank to be confirmed, and he refused to, so Antonio next went to Liz herself, demanding a paternity test Liz of course refused, saying Keri and the baby have already had too many tests and adamantly reiterating that she was already pregnant when they slept together.

Well, Antonio still wanted to tell Keri the truth and decided for the 165th time today that he was going to. This time at the coffee house, he looked her in the eye and prepared to spill the beans (no pun intended).

But don't you know something will interrupt him again?

I 'spose we'll find out on Monday, yes? Do me a favor and don't spend your weekend obsessing over it, agreed? See you all next week.

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