Y&R Transcript Tuesday 8/7/07 -- Canada; Wednesday 8/8/07 -- U.S.A.
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Sharon: You know, I was really stressed about the trial the day that we planned that trip, and I really just wanted to get away.
Nick: Everybody needs to escape now and then.
Sharon: Yeah, you're right. And I know that the trip would've been completely fun and innocent, but... I don't think that jack would see it that way.
Nick: So he doesn't trust you then?
Sharon: No, he completely trusts me. It's just that I think it would make him uncomfortable.
Nick: So that's a no?
Sharon: That's a never.
Nick: Never say never.
Sharon: Well, I already did.
Nick: Okay, then. Well, how about if we do the shoot anyway? We'll schedule it someplace locally. It'll come with a disclaimer, of course. "No husbands were ever threatened at any point during the planning of this shoot."
Jack: Gloria. I didn't realize it was mustang ranch night.
Gloria: Actually, it's couture from belgium. Six of them in the whole wide world, one of them owned by a queen.
Jack: As in, drag queen?
Gloria: As in, my husband loved me so much he made me a very wealthy woman.
Jack: What is it they say? "A pig in a dress is still a pig"?
Gloria: You know, I guess they didn't tell you, jack, but I've reserved the entire club for william's wake.
Jack: No kidding. Your whole fan club will be here? Wait, is there more than just your slimy progeny?
Gloria: You bet. There's a whole list of very important people, but unfortunately, you're not on that list, jack, so it's time for you to vacate the premises.
Jack: Oh, I'll leave when I'm good and ready. You just tend to your business, which I guess is putting on this garish display of your alleged love for yet another wealthy man you conned into marrying you for a nanosecond. I'll tend to my affairs.
Kevin: This is summer. When the u is in session, it's hard to find a seat in this place.
Man: I did my homework.
Kevin: Well, then you know the place is a gold mine.
Man: Here's what I don't know. I called you in may about maybe buying this place. Ditto, december. You never called back, till an hour ago.
Kevin: Well, you know how it is. You establish something great-- a real cash cow-- and, uh, you're ready to move on to the next challenge. Now I'm just looking for the right buyer. Somebody with vision.
Man: What about the financials?
Kevin: It's all right here. Take your time. Look around the place. I'll be around. Help yourself-- nah, never mind.
Daniel: Are you serious? I mean, you're not gonna really sell this place, are you?
Kevin: Yeah, I am. For jana.
Amber: You can't be serious. We are facing criminal charges. We need the money more than she does.
Kevin: There is a rational explanation for everything that she has done.
Amber: Oh, yeah, yeah, right. She is evil. She is crazy. She's sick. She's twisted.
Kevin: No, she's sick-- physically sick. Period.
Daniel: No, you're physically sick, period. Are you for real?
Kevin: Where the tumor is pressing against her brain-- that's what is causing all of this weird behavior.
Amber: And how do you know?
Kevin: Research, okay? She needs surgery. And the state of wisconsin in all of its infinite wisdom has refused to pay for it. So I told her that I would.
Amber: You know, daniel's right. Actually, you just might be crazier than she is.
Kevin: The next time I see her, I'm gonna have my pen in one hand and my checkbook in the other.
Jana: Kevin, I love you. I love you, kevin. I love you, kevin. Kevin, I love you. I love you.
Paul: All right, here you go. Replenish.
Maggie: So for william to do a secret D.N.A. Test, he must've been protecting someone. We know this. So the question is, who?
Paul: You said you didn't wanna talk about work.
Maggie: No, I didn't wanna talk about work, but you started talking about work and you got me thinking. And I'm thinking the D.A.'S office would really like it if we cracked this case. So it must've been someone close to him. Co-worker?
Paul: Family member?
Maggie: New wife?
Paul: Gloria? The D.N.A. Didn't match. Couldn't be.
Gloria: Why don't you put that arrangement right there?
Jack: I made my decision. Yeah, book the dates in france. Get back to me as soon as you have a confirmation. Thank you.
Gloria: Well, how nice. They're from ashley. At least she takes after her father and has some class.
Jack: I'm gonna get a lecture from you on class?
Gloria: Senator abbott, why don't you be the first one to sign my book? That would mean so much to my family. Ah, perfect! Right there. And don't worry about him. He's leaving.
Jack: Gloria, there are a lot of tables here.
Gloria: And for tonight, jack, I own every single one of 'em. You know, it's good to be good, jack, but I've learned it's better to be rich. And I'm rich. Deal with it.
Michael: Seeing jana was disturbing. She was acting like someone out of a roger corman film.
Lauren: On purpose, you think?
Michael: Of course on purpose. Why does everyone keep asking me that? I mean, six months in restraint versus 60 years behind bars? You always go with the restraints. Oh, and that's not the worst of it. She was sitting there looking at a chair across from herself-- an empty chair-- and she kept saying over and over again, (imitating jana) "kevin, I love you. Kevin, I love you. Kevin, I love you." (Normal voice) ew!
Lauren: Did she honestly think that he was there?
Michael: Please, she's the sarah bernhardt of the psych ward.
Lauren: Are you sure about this? I mean, isn't it possible that her behavior is caused by this brain tumor?
Michael: No, no, no, see, that's kevin's argument. And here's why he's wrong. It's been months since she tried to kill him and all of a sudden, now that she's caught, she's so ill she has to be hospitalized. Please. I have a bridge to sell you.
Lauren: Yeah, you're right. It is a very convenient timeline. All right, so now you just have to convince your brother, and then drop the bomb that you're backing the prosecutor.
Michael: Well, after the memorial service, I'll corral some of his friends, or co-defendants, I should say, for help and... if he doesn't listen to me, maybe he'll listen to them.
Daniel: So I pretty much had everything and screwed it all up. Like a one-man scorched earth policy, only I was the earth.
Nick: Have you talked to a therapist?
Daniel: Yeah. It didn't do me much good, though. I was about as honest with her as I was with everyone else, that includes myself.
Nick: Well, it sounds like you are now.
Daniel: Way to step up to the plate, huh? Especially when I'm facing multiple felonies. Lose my job, wreck my marriage. The only reason you're talking to me is you don't remember the last six months.
Nick: That's not true. You're still my stepson. I wish you would've talked to me.
Daniel: Yeah, well, I didn't talk to anyone.
Nick: Well, you're talking now. And things change.
Daniel: I hope so. Because the next step down for me... there is no next step down. I mean, there's nothing.
Nick: So what can I do?
Daniel: You're not gonna wanna do it.
Nick: Why don't you let me decide that?
Daniel: Okay, well, neil canned me from my job.
Nick: What for?
Daniel: I messed up. I admit that, but I could really use this job. I mean, at least it would let me know that I'm not 100% human garbage. And I know I don't deserve another chance, but maybe--
Neil: Daniel, I'm getting tired of telling you this. You were terminated. You're no longer a newman employee. You need to pack up your personal effects and go home, and don't come back.
Daniel: I was just asking...
Neil: I know what you were asking.
Nick: I think we should discuss this.
Neil: Fine. After daniel's left the premises.
Daniel: Maybe you could put your personal feelings aside?
Neil: Daniel, a few days ago you said some very ugly things to me. You have shown your immaturity and a deep lack of respect for authority. It's the end of your bus ride, son. Good-bye.
Daniel: If I found the cure to cancer, you'd find a way to put me down.
Nick: I'll give you a call, daniel.
Neil: Did he tell you what he did?
Nick: No details.
Neil: Well, listen, we all got demons. I know that.
Nick: So what did he do? Gambling? Drugs?
Neil: No, worse than that. While he was getting his pornographic thrills here at work, a spy ware package infiltrated the system and took over the network. Now we caught it, but only when the provider notified us. Um, hackers were able to access company files and employee's personal information. You know, credit cards, bank accounts, socials-- you name it, they got it.
Neil: Yeah. And you know who's liable, right?
Nick: We are. 100%.
Neil: I gotta fire anyone who brings their personal problems into work and makes them ours.
Kevin: So you got to check the place out? What's your offer?
Man: I don't do offers. I do take it or leave it.
Kevin: (Chuckles) I pay my dishwashers more than that.
Amber: I won't take much of your time, mr. Winters.
Amber: I'm sure you're aware of certain developments that have left me in a financial predicament.
Neil: You, daniel and kevin stole over $700,000. That's a lot of money.
Amber: No, we did not steal it.
Neil: Right, you found it. On a dead man. Unless, of course, you found it on a live man and you turned him into a dead man.
Amber: No, no, okay, I wouldn't-- I admit that I am in some trouble. And I need a second job, so I was hoping that maybe you would let me come and sing at your club.
Amber: Well, remember when I filled in before? Everyone loved it.
Neil: You could be billie holiday and beyoncé rolled into one and I still wouldn't hire you. You're bad for my business and you're bad for my family.
Amber: It was a reach, I know.
Neil: It was a hail mary.
Amber: Thank you for your time. I know you don't think much of me, mr. Winters, but I'm not a bad person.
Karen: You need to work on that free throw.
Neil: You ever notice how your--your persona life can be more stressful than business?
Karen: I have just the cure for that.
Amber: So I asked neil if I could sing at indigo.
Daniel: You really are desperate.
Amber: No kidding. He turned me down.
Daniel: Of course he did. He hates you almost as much as he hates me. He blames you for breaking up his daughter's marriage.
Amber: You know, I only ever wanted what was best for you guys.
Daniel: Well, I didn't say I blamed you.
Amber: If I could take it all back, I would-- the felony charges, people staring at me like I'm already convicted, if I could get cane back.
Daniel: Good luck with that one.
Amber: You know, maybe you could talk to him.
Daniel: Well, why would he wanna talk to me?
Amber: You don't have ulterior motives.
Daniel: Oh. Translation-- you don't have anyone else to ask.
Amber: Come on, please, daniel? You're my best friend. I would do it for you.
Daniel: I would, if I could.
Amber: Maybe we could help each other.
Daniel: I can't even help myself right now.
Amber: Well, at least you let me in. That's gotta be a good sign.
Cane: So what do you want?
Amber: To talk.
Cane: I have nothing to say.
Amber: Okay, then listen. When I was a kid, there was this cool clique in school. And I wanted to be a part of that so bad, but... I knew it was never gonna happen because I was the trailer girl. Then one day the queen bee came to me and she said that I could be a part of their little group if I stole something from the stop-and-shop. And, uh... I figured, you know, a magazine, because I could stick it under my spice girls shirt.
Amber: So... instead of swiping "tiger beat," I swiped "town and country." Because it was filled with big, beautiful houses like this one.
Cane: Did they let you in their little club?
Amber: No. I mean, they had me going for a while, but... "town and country," I love that magazine.
Cane: I don't care.
Amber: I thought those girls laughing was the worst pain I was ever gonna go through in my life. And then I grew up and I went through a whole lot of jerks. And then I met a prince from australia. And then I fell in love. I really fell in love for the first time in my life. And now I know there's something more painful than anything I've ever gone through. It's the pain of losing you.
Lauren: Let's go talk to some of your guests.
Gloria: Good idea.
Paul: We're so sorry. And again, if there's anything we can do.
Maggie: Yeah, just-- just let us know.
Gloria: Thank you, paul. Maggie, I know how much william loved working with you.
Paul: We had the greatest respect for your husband.
Gloria: He was a good man.
Maggie: Not a dishonest bone in his body.
Lauren: Thank you both for coming. That was really nice.
Gloria: Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go say hello to some other guests.
Lauren: Excuse us.
Maggie: You know what just occurred to me?
Maggie: The, uh... second D.N.A. Test? The culprit might be right here.
Paul: I'll have to keep my eyes open for anything unusual.
Paul: Like you in a dress.
Jill: Gloria, I'm glad that you and william got married. You made him very happy. And we both ended up with the right guy.
Ji min: It was meant to be.
Gloria: Thank you, jill. And I also believe that, ji min. Even before william and i started dating, I knew he was my destiny.
Lauren: You just should've had more time with him.
Ji min: You know, when my brother and i used to fight, my mother used to say, "you boys quarrel like you have all the time in the world to make up." But of course we don'T.
Jill: Did you listen to her?
Ji min: Not as much as I should've.
Nick: Hey, jack.
Nick: You, uh... here for the memorial?
Jack: Hardly. I certainly had nothing against bardwell. Well, perhaps his taste in women. What are you doing here?
Nick: Oh, just, uh, picking up some food that gina made for me.
Jack: Actually I was just putting a surprise together for sharon-- the honeymoon we never had.
Nick: Sharon loves surprises.
Jack: I know.
Nick: You know, you're a lucky man. I asked sharon to reschedule that overnight photo shoot and she said she wouldn't do it because she was worried it would hurt your feelings.
Jack: Very thoughtful.
Nick: Yeah, it was. See ya.
Jack: See ya around.
Kevin: Hi, mom. How can I help?
Gloria: Oh, honey, I'm just so glad you're here. I just thought there'd be more people.
Lauren: Hi, sweetie. Gloria, they're still arriving.
Kevin: Um, are you gonna speak?
Lauren: Yes, in fact, she worked hours on the eulogy, and it's in my purse.
Gloria: Thank you, thank you, lauren. I'm nervous.
Kevin: Mom, you can address a joint session of congress, kings and you still wouldn't break a sweat.
Gloria: Yeah, but when it comes to william, it's something else. I just wanna be dignified.
Kevin: Well, if it gets to be too tough, hand me your speech and I'll deliver it for you.
Gloria: My son, the jewel. Where's my other son?
Michael: Yeah, I'll call you about that. Thanks. Hey, I'm glad you're here. I wanted to talk to you about kevin. Is this your gear?
Daniel: Yes. Neil fired me.
Michael: Because you'd been arrested?
Daniel: A little worse. Because I brought my problems to work. Neil's mr. 12-step. You'd think he would've understood.
Michael: Well, neil is also a C.E.O. He may not have had a choice. Look, daniel... great men don't get to be great because they don't make mistakes. They get to be great because they learn from their mistakes. Your life is far from over.
Daniel: What did you wanna talk to me about? Something about kevin?
Michael: Yeah, well, there's always something about kevin. Let me help you with this. I'll walk you out.
Cane: You see, the problem with the story about the magazine is it proves my point. You don't care about me, all you care about is this.
Cane: "I, amber ashby, will never, ever take a penny from cane ashby. His money shall be separate from mine forever." The only problem is that your name isn't amber ashby and our marriage was a sham.
Amber: I signed amber moore at t bottom. Just covering my bases. You know, every girl... she dreams of falling in love with someone like-- like in the movies. I never thought that existed until I met you. You were so sweet and so kind and genuine and... and even when you didn't have a penny, you made me wanna be a better person.
Cane: But your behavior says something completely different.
Amber: No, I can-- I can be a better person. I can. Please. I'm begging you. Just don't walk away from me, please.
Cane: Don't beg. Don't beg.
Amber: I love you.
Cane: Don't beg. Don't be on your knees. You shouldn't have to be.
Amber: I would do anything.
Amber: I would do anything just for you.
Cane: For me, baby?
Amber: Yes, just for you. Prprprprprprprprprprprprprprprp
Cane: Is this what you want?
Cane: Is this what you want?
Cane: Yeah? Yeah? This is what you want?
Amber: Wait, what about jill and kay?
Cane: There's no one here.
Cane: No one's coming home. Tell me what you want.
Cane: Tell me what you want.
Amber: I want you.
Cane: What do you want? What do you want?
Amber: I want you.
Cane: What do you want?
Jack: So nick told me the two of you were planning an overnight to the development site.
Sharon: Yeah, um... I had thought maybe I'd go out of town for a few days. And nick suggested clear springs to do the shoot that I never did. And then he invited himself along to supervise.
Jack: So you said, "let me check with my husband and make sure he's all right with an overnight with my ex who's still in love with me."
Sharon: Well, I was going to, but then, um... nick decided he needed to be in court, and then the trip never happened, and so I just figured, what's the point?
Jack: The point is, you said yes.
Michael: Sorry I'm late. Uh, work.
Gloria: Uh-huh. Kevin's case? Tell me.
Michael: We're here for your husband.
Gloria: YeaH. I wish he could hear what I'm going to say about him.
Michael: Well, who knows? Maybe he can.
Ji min: I hate funerals.
Jill: Yeah, but this is a memorial for a wonderful man.
Ji min: You're right. You know... I never went to my brother's funeral.
Jill: When did he die?
Ji min: About five years ago, next month.
Jill: And why didn't you go?
Ji min: We had a brutal fight when my grandfather died. He made him the executor of the will and I... I was the eldest. I thought it should've been me.
Jill: Sounds like you were mad at the wrong guy.
Ji min: Yeah, well... I hold on to anger. I don't like that about myself.
Jill: Aren't you lucky you have me? Because I will joke it right out of you.
Lauren: So how's jana?
Kevin: She's terrible.
Lauren: Well, it's a difficult situation. You're in one, too.
Kevin: Why, 'cause I got arrested? I'll live, but... lauren, this brain tumor? What she's doing at that hospital-- that's--it's not living.
Lauren: What if you're wrong? What if she's tricking you?
Kevin: What if I'm right?
Lauren: Kevin, come on.
Heather: Thank you.
Michael: I got a good look at her.
Heather: Mmm. And?
Michael: If I were a judge, I'd have second thoughts about letting her stand trial.
Heather: You still think she's faking?
Michael: Of course she is.
Michael: We should look into round-the-clock surveillance. And if medical necessity requires that we keep watch on her...
Heather: And she drops her guard...
Michael: Yeah. Faking insanity 24/7-- that's no mean feat.
Kevin: I heard that. You're not helping her, are you?
Michael: Actually, I am.
Kevin: Behind my back? Were you gonna tell me?
Gloria: Please gather around, everybody. First of all, thank you for coming. I'd like to say a few words in honor of my husband, william bardwell.
Heather: Excuse me.
Kevin: We're not done.
Lauren: You told kevin now?
Michael: Worse. He overheard. What's the smell?
Gloria: Gardenias. Whenever I think of william, I always think of gardenias. Their heady scent fills the air we breathe tonight. Most everyone knew william as straight laced, by-the-book bardwell, tough prosecutor, but he had a passion for gardenias. And he grew them, bet you didn't know that. But you see, there was the public william that everybody saw, and the private william that I knew. I doubt he'd want any opposing counsel to know that he could sing along to any beatles song. And when he wasn't doing that, for a while, he played semipro baseball. He still loved to go out to the batting cages. The dearest thing about william, he married his high school sweetheart. No, it wasn't me. She died. And so that tough prosecutor joined a bereavement group, because he didn't know how he was going to carry on. I was in that group, because I'd lost my love, too. And over the course of time, we came to know each other and to help each other. And the a miracle happened. William and I... began our own new love story. A lot of people in this town thought we were quite the odd couple. William didn't care. Some widows would wear black, but william always loved my style. I shall cherish you and carry you with me in my heart every day for the rest of my life. And I hope that you, his friends, will do the same. To william!
All: To william.
Ji min: Hear, hear.
Kevin: Look me in the eye and tell me you went behind my back to help the prosecutor.
Michael: I went behind your back to help the prosecutor.
Kevin: How low can you go?!
Michael: Low enough to see the videotape of you and colleen stuck in the refrigerator--
Kevin: I am telling you to back off.
Michael: No can do. I think you should let me do this for you.
Kevin: Guess what? Guess what? I don't care what you think.
Kevin: I'm paying for her surgery.
Michael: And how are you gonna do that, my hero?
Kevin: I'm selling the coffeehouse.
Michael: You're what? No, no, no, look, she's not the crazy one, you are. You have got to be out of your mind.
Kevin: Go to hell, michael.
Michael: Kevin, listen to--
Maggie: Who knew that gloria could be so eloquent?
Paul: Who knew she could bake muffins?
Paul: Well, I was just thinking, I saw an empty banquet room. It could use some investigating.
Maggie: Do you need backup?
Paul: If it's you, always.
Maggie: But do you think it's sacrilegious, considering?
Paul: I have a sneaking suspicion that william would approve.
Karen: Are you kidding me?
Neil: What? What?
Karen: Is that all you got? Come on, don't hit me like a girl!
Neil: Like a--
Karen: Yeah. Ow! Oh, wow!
Neil: Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry, karen. Are you--are you all right?
Karen: Yeah. So that's what you like huh?
Karen: Picking on poor, defenseless women?
Neil: Yeah, right, that's my thing.
Karen: That's what you like? A poor, defenseless woman. Oh! Oh!
Karen: Oh, my God, neil!
Neil: Uh... woman, yes. Defenseless... I'm not so sure.
Sharon: I don't know what to say, except... I'm sorry.
Jack: It's already forgotten.
Sharon: I would never hurt you.
Jack: I know that.
Sharon: It'll never happen again.
Jack: I hope not. I don't wanna have to beat up on nick.
Nick: So neil told me what happened. That's pretty serious stuff.
Daniel: It's bad, I know.
Nick: I would've fired you, too.
Daniel: Well, I deserve that. You that someone can change if they really want to?
Nick: I do, if they really want it. I'll help you.
Daniel: I need a job. I'm not proud. I will do anything.
Nick: Well, let me see what I can do.
Daniel: I promise that if you help me with this now, I'll do the same thing for someone someday.
Amber: I guess you're expecting jill and kay. I better go put my clothes on. Or we could take this upstairs?
Cane: Do you know how pretty you are?
Amber: That's because I'm happy.
Cane: So tell me... how many guys you been with?
Cane: It's what you do, isn't it? You use sex to get what you want? So tell me, how many guys you been with? Must be in the double digits, like, what 20? 30? 40?
Amber: Why are you doing this? You love me.
Cane: Don't flatter yourself.
Amber: Why did you...
Cane: Tell me, amber... tell me how it feels to be played by someone you think loves you. Tell me how it feels.
Amber: You were pretending?
Cane: What, to care? Now you know how I felt.
Amber: You don't mean it.
Cane: I could do the gentlemanly thing and let you, uh, go and have a shower, but you're not really the sort of girl that a man treats like a lady. So, uh, I've got a hot date at indigo. I'm gonna go and get my keys. And, uh, when I get back, I want you gone.
Gloria: Where's kevin?
Michael: It was a work thing. He said he'd call you.
Gloria: Was my speech all right?
Lauren: Oh, it was magnificent. It couldn't have been better.
Gloria: Good. William deserved magnificent.
Lauren: Yes, he did.
Gloria: You know, I think we oughta take all of these beautiful flowers and give them to the hospital.
Lauren: That's a great idea.
"the young and the restless"...
Lily: I have already been married and I'm about to be divorced.
Cane: You will stay away from me. You do not want me as your enemy.
Kay: If you agree to leave genoa city and never see my daughter again, I'm prepared to write you a check.
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