Y&R Transcript Thursday 5/31/07

Y&R Transcript Thursday 5/31/07 -- Canada; Friday 6/1/07 -- U.S.A.

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Provided By Amanda
Proofread By Emma

[Phyllis remembering]

Phyllis: Don't leave! I-I need you! Your daughter needs you.

Nick: Dru's family needed her, too.

Phyllis: What do you mean?

Nick: That's why I had to die. It's your punishment for causing Dru's death. And it's something you're gonna have to live with for the rest of your life.

Phyllis: Nicholas!

[Phyllis calls Lauren]

Lauren's voice: Hi, this is Lauren. Sorry I can't take your call. Leave a message after the tone.

Amber: (Giggles) at least they haven't kicked me off "Catwalk" yet. I mean, you saw my competition. I'm--I'm the best, right?

Cane: By far.

Amber: I am totally gonna win this.

Cane: Can I help you? Hello?

Amber: Just ignore them. Okay, this whole thing is gonna blow over soon.

Cane: Daniel better stay out of my sight.

Amber: This is Lily's fault.

Cane: Look... if I found some pictures of some guy naked on your phone, I'd react the same way. We shouldn't have covered up for your buddy in the first place.

Amber: Okay, you know what? We were helping him.

Cane: It was wrong.

Amber: It was wrong of her to freak out on me in public.

Cane: I want you to stay away from the bloke. I don't like the fact he cruises the web for porn.

Amber: It's not like that.

Cane: Look at what he put his wife through. That guy's got issues. I don't want you getting sucked in.

Daniel: Happy birthday. Look, I know you might not want it, but just take it. I got it for you weeks ago, okay?

Lily: I don't want it.

Daniel: Can you please not be mad at me? This is not my fault.

Lily: Oh, of course it's not your fault. Someone forced you to look at porn and e-mail the women. And Amber just happened to take a picture of her breasts and e-mail it to you by accident.

Daniel: It wasn't her.

Lily: Daniel, I don't believe anything you say. I feel like I don't even know you anymore.

Daniel: Lily, I am the same guy as always.

Lily: No. No, the guy I married wasn't like this. He didn't lie and sneak around. He treated me like a princess.

Daniel: And I always will.

Lily: Right. By trying to pick up other women? Am I not enough for you?

Daniel: You are more than enough for me. And I stopped, I told you.

Lily: You are such a liar. I know Amber has been helping you cruise those sites.

Daniel: Lily, it is not like that. Please, just listen to me, okay? I'm--

Lily: No, don't touch me. Get out.

(Cell phone ringing)

Jack: Hold on. Wait. Hello?

Phyllis: Hey, it's me.

Jack: Uh, can you hold on a second? Make sure Ben gets a copy of that, too, okay? I'm back.

Phyllis: Hi, how's it going?

Jack: Well, the phones are going crazy. The press only wanna report on rumors.

Phyllis: Oh, wow, reporters reporting actual news-- that's unheard of, right?

Jack: Well, there is some good news.

Phyllis: Tell me.

Jack: My stepson made it through his first night in his new home.

Phyllis: Oh, that's great. That's great. He's a great kid. I wasn't worried about him.

Jack: Wait, he's on the phone now? Okay, tell him to hold. I'll be right there. Okay, I'm sorry, I gotta go back to work.

Phyllis: Oh, okay. Um, it sounds like you need some help. How's the interactive web site going?

Jack: Oh, too many questions. I don't have time to answer 'em all.

Phyllis: Well, I mean, that's the whole purpose-- interacting with your voters, right?

Jack: Any chance you might come in and help?

Phyllis: Oh, sure, yeah, I--sure, I'd love to do that.

Michael: Ah, William! Our favorite D.A. how you doing?

Gloria: William, what a nice surprise! Honey!

Will: I didn't expect to see everybody here. Perfect timing.

Gloria: Oh, what's going on?

Will: Well, I've come to pick up my bride. I've got a justice of the peace standing by.

Gloria: William! You know I can't wait.

Will: Well, then let's make it official.

Gloria: Honey, I have to contact the wedding planner and--

Will: Oh, come on, why bother? You'll just be wasting more time.

Gloria: And what am I supposed to wear? Lauren?

Will: What you've got on is perfect.

Gloria: Oh, Sweetie, all right, then who's going to take photographs?

Lauren: You know, we do have the world's best video camera. I'm working on my documentary-- "Fenmore--the first tooth."

Gloria: Well, I would like a bouquet.

Kevin: There's a flower shop around the corner.

Gloria: And maybe something borrowed and something blue.

Kevin: I'll lend you my blue garter.

Gloria: All right, where do we have a ceremony without a reservation?

Lauren: You know, why don't we have it here?

Will: Yeah. Let's have it here. Whatever makes you happy.

Kevin: And they said he was untrainable.

Lauren: Oh, you'll get your turn, Kev.

Kevin: Oh, joy.

Gloria: So we're really doing this?

Will: Is that a yes?

Gloria: Yes, William. Yes, William! Yes, William!

(Cell phone ringing)

Will: Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. Yeah, William Bardwell.

Lauren: Gloria? Okay, so we need flowers. We need champagne.

Will: Really? That was quick.

Kevin: Oh, uh, food? Maybe?

Lauren: Food!

Will: Um, it's the office. The D.N.A. results are in.

Daniel: Mom? What are you doing?

Phyllis: Hey. Um, I'm working on Jack's campaign.

Daniel: Shouldn't you be taking some time off?

Phyllis: Why? So I can stay at home and think of Nick?

Daniel: No, you just look tired.

Phyllis: Um, well, Summer was up all night.

Daniel: Is she sick?

Phyllis: Uh, no, she's just teething. She's teething. Her gums were swollen, and, uh, you know, she had a fever.

Daniel: You should've called me.

Phyllis: I did call you. And your--your phone was off.

Daniel: I'm sorry. I spent the night at Kevin's last night.

Phyllis: I figured. I saw that "Extreme Catwalk" clip. Um... why would you keep a naked picture on your phone?

Daniel: Mom, it was a joke. You know, some guy sent it to me.

Phyllis: Well, you should've erased it right away.

Daniel: I thought that I did. Look, I remember that I was working on a philosophy paper and my brain was kinda fried. And, you know, I got the picture and I sent the guy a text back and told him not to send me any more. And then I thought that I erased it.

Phyllis: Okay.

Daniel: But I got a new phone a couple months ago and I must've done something wrong. Look, I had no idea that it was still there.

Phyllis: All right, I understand.

Neil: I hope my daughter was smart enough not to buy into that story.

Phyllis: Neil, he said it was a joke. Give him a break.

Neil: Is that what you want me to do? Give him a break? I give him a lot of breaks.

Daniel: Mom, its okay. You don't have to defend me.

Neil: Your marriage to my daughter was a mistake.

Phyllis: Oh, come on, Neil, you're overreacting.

Neil: Not after talking to my daughter. You embarrassed her and humiliated her.

Phyllis: Listen, you don't talk to my son like this. It's their marriage. They love each other. They'll work it out.

Neil: They're gonna work it out?

Phyllis: Yes.

Neil: Kid, you lied to my daughter. Do you think honestly that she'll ever be able to believe you again?

Daniel: You know what? I didn't lie to her, okay? And I would never do anything to hurt her.

Neil: It's too late for that. You already did that. And if my daughter is smart, she won't give you the chance to do it again.

Devon: You know, I should kick your husband's...

Lily: No. No. That won't help.

Devon: That'll be my birthday present to you.

Lily: Thank you, but no. Man... guys suck.

Devon: Hey now!

Lily: You know what I mean. Oh, God, I just--I hate this. I thought he was different, you know?

Devon: Well, Lily, don't say I never warned you about him.

Lily: You know, Devon, I don't need to hear that right now, okay?

Devon: All right, I know. I'm sorry.

Lily: But you know what the worst part is? Is that it wasn't just some random naked girl. It was... it was Amber.

Devon: Well, Daniel's a jerk. And who knows what else he did.

Lily: Please don't say that.

Devon: No.

Lily: You know, why is it that whenever guys get what they want, they just wanna move onto the next girl?

Devon: Well, it's not like girls don't do the same thing.

Lily: Not like men.

Devon: Well, trust me, Lily, there are some good guys out there.

Lily: Yeah. I thought I had one.

Will: Mm-hmm. Okay, thanks.

Gloria: Well?

Will: I've got some bad news.

Gloria: William...

Will: The D.N.A. test didn't match anybody to the evidence.

Kevin: Well, that is too bad.

Michael: I'm not surprised. Whoever did it is probably long gone.

Will: So much for my wedding present.

Gloria: Don't you worry about a wedding present. Let's just think about getting married.

Lauren: You know, I have to go to the store for a couple of hours.

Gloria: Lauren, before you go, would you please be my matron of honor?

Lauren: I'd love to.

Will: Oh, hey, I need a best man.

Kevin: Oh, I'll do it. I was Michael's best man. I'll just regurgitate the same speech.

Will: Well, thank you, Kevin. I appreciate that.

Kevin: That way Michael can give Mom away.

Michael: With both hands.

Lauren: So, Honey, good luck in court today.

Michael: Well, give me a call when you want me to come get you.

Lauren: I will. Thanks for driving me here.

Michael: I guess there is one good thing about Gloria's sham of a marriage.

Lauren: That would be that we get our place back to ourselves?

Michael: Uh-huh. At last.

Lauren: At last.

Michael: You know what that means, right?

Lauren: I think I do.

Michael: Oh, hey, Lily. Happy birthday.

Lily: Thank you.

Michael: All right, I gotta go.

Lauren: Bye, Sweetie.

Michael: See you later, Old Lady Winters.

Lily: Hey!

Lauren: Hey, excuse me, what are you doing here? You're not scheduled to work today.

Lily: I know, but I wanted to work.

Lauren: On your birthday? I don't think so. Don't you have plans?

Lily: Well, Melissa had a doctor's appointment, so...

Lauren: Right, right, so that's why Amber's covering.

Lily: I know, but Melissa called me.

Lauren: No. No, you are not working today. I'm sorry. You're going home. But before you do, I have something for you.

Lily: What? Lauren, you didn't have to.

Lauren: Happy birthday.

Lily: Oh, thank you! No, you didn't!

Lauren: Yes!

Lily: How did you know I wanted this?!

Lauren: Maybe because you put it on hold three times? I don't know.

Lily: I know. I changed my mind because I couldn't afford it.

Lauren: Your mom was looking at this the last time she was in the store. She was thinking about buying it for you.

Lily: Yeah, probably 'cause she wanted to borrow it from me.

Lauren: Great taste runs in the family.

Lily: Yeah.

Lauren: Oh, Honey. Here. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

Lily: You know... I just miss her. And I wish I could just talk to her one last time. And tell her everything I forgot to say.

Lauren: Of course you do. And I know it's not the same, but if you ever need to talk or you need a shoulder, I am here for you. Always.

Lily: Okay. Thanks.

Amber: Hey. Happy birthday. I'm confused. Um, I thought she had the day off.

Lauren: She does.

Lily: Don't worry, I'm leaving. Thank you for the present.

Lauren: Oh, absolutely.

Evan: So you're getting married today?

Will: Yeah, in a few hours.

Evan: Mmm. Am I invited?

Gloria: Hmm!

Evan: Congratulations. You know, I thought that maybe--

Will: You thought wrong.

Evan: Well, I'm happy for you.

Gloria: Thank you.

Will: I gotta run. Can I trust you with my fiancée?

Evan: Can't promise anything.

Gloria: Well, I can, Honey, don't you worry.

Will: I'll see you soon.

Gloria: See you in a little. Hurry back.

Evan: Laying it on a little thick, don't you think?

Gloria: What are you doing here?

Evan: You're getting married. Now you gotta pay me that finder's fee.

Gloria: Evan...

Evan: That was our deal, Glo. I help you bag your millionaire, you help me with my finances.

Gloria: Yeah, well, I'm a working woman, and I don't have that kind of cash.

Evan: Yeah. Yet. Now I was scraping up enough cash for a used sailboat, but now I'm starting to think about something more comfortable. You can help me with that, can't you, Glo?

Gloria: If you promise to sail out of my life.

Evan: Maybe I will. If you make me a deal.

Gloria: Where am I supposed to find that kind of money?

Evan: Oh, I know you. You're resourceful.

Gloria: You don't wanna hang around Genoa City after I'm married. Because William is already suspicious of you.

Evan: Okay. Fine. You just give me what I want. I'll sail off into the sunset.

Jack: So what did Daniel tell you?

Phyllis: That he's innocent.

Jack: You don't believe him?

Phyllis: Why would he still have that on his phone? You know... I trust my son. Maybe it's nothing.

Jack: I think it's a little more than nothing.

Phyllis: Why do you say that?

Jack: I don't know. I just don't think Lily would make that big a deal over one picture.

Phyllis: Are you saying there are more?

Jack: Look, I should've told you this before. Um, Daniel got caught looking at porn on the company computer.

Phyllis: What? By whom?

Jack: The I.T. department.

Phyllis: The I.T. department. When did this happen?

Jack: A few weeks ago.

Phyllis: A few weeks ago? Jack!

Jack: He made a mistake.

Phyllis: (Sighs) did he admit it?

Jack: No, he claimed he forgot to log off and somebody else must've done it.

Phyllis: But you thought it was him?

Jack: I thought this was probably the end of the whole thing.

Phyllis: Oh, Jack, why didn't you tell me?

Jack: Well, I was all caught up in the Clear Springs development at the time. I'm sorry. I should've told you.

Phyllis: Oh, I can't believe this. Why is he looking at that stuff? He doesn't need to look at that stuff. Oh!

Jack: Wait, wait, wait, where are you going?

Phyllis: I'm gonna go talk to him.

Jack: Well, I think he feels bad enough.

Phyllis: I'm sure he feels bad. Why is he doing this? He has a great job. He has a great wife. He doesn't need to do this. What is he thinking?

Jack: He wasn't thinking.

Phyllis: Obviously not. How did I raise a son that is so self-destructive?

Daniel: I blew it.

Kevin: Again?

Daniel: Yeah. I went home and, uh, Lily was there.

Kevin: She didn't like the present?

Daniel: She didn't open it.

Kevin: She will. It's just--let things cool. It'll get better, I promise.

Daniel: Maybe. I'm not counting on it.

Daniel: Cane.

Cane: I'm working.

Daniel: Listen, man, that picture was not of Amber.

Cane: I can't hear you. Because of your little hobby, is all over the 'net. And now my wife can't leave the house without being stared down.

Daniel: Come on, man, you mean to tell me that you never looked at another woman?

Cane: Yeah, but you took it a little too far, didn't you, Mate?

Daniel: You know what? I love my wife and this has nothing to do with it.

Cane: Too bad she disagrees.

Daniel: Well, it doesn't matter because I'm not doing it anymore.

Cane: You see, now your problem is my problem and I can't have that. So you stay away from Amber. Are we clear?

Devon: My sister is a wreck because of Daniel. And I tell ya, I could kill him for what he's done.

Colleen: Yeah, well, at least she stopped blaming herself and making excuses for him.

Korbel: There's a lot been said about the prevalence of teenagers being exposed to online pornography, and, you know, unwanted solicitations.

Colleen: No, this was wanted. Trust me.

Devon: Yeah, it was. And now Lily thinks she's not good enough.

Colleen: Which is why we have to do something.

Amber: That is super cute.

Lauren: Yeah, and if you want, we can raise the hem. Here, let me show you another dress.

Lily: I left my cell phone.

Amber: Look, can we talk for a minute?

Lily: Get out of my face.

Amber: It was a mistake!

Lily: Oh, that's exactly what Daniel said. Another coincidence?

Amber: Look, if you just listen--

Lily: No, friends don't keep pictures like that on their cell phones.

Amber: Okay, it wasn't me!

Lily: God, Amber, you are so pathetic! I'm so over this.

Amber: Yeah...

Lauren: Okay, what... what is going on? The customer and I could hear you all the way in the dressing room.

Amber: Haven't you seen the clip online?

Lauren: Amber, I don't wanna make accusations, but the two of you have to leave this stuff at the door.

Amber: I tried, but it's--

Lauren: No, no, no, it is not good for business. The customers can not hear the two of you arguing.

Amber: She came at me.

Lauren: No, listen to me and listen to me clearly. If you can't deal with this, I'm gonna have to let you go.

Jack: Well, that sounds great. I wish I was there with you. Oh, no, Noah has the whole evening planned. It's gonna be pizza and video games with the puppy. I love you, too. I'll see you tomorrow.

Phyllis: Sharon is out of town?

Jack: Uh, yeah, just for the night. So what else are the voters saying?

Phyllis: Um, that you can't control your wife and your ex-wife.

Jack: Show me a man who can.

Phyllis: I ruined your campaign.

Jack: You don't get all the credit.

Phyllis: Thanks.

Jack: Hey, I still could win this thing, you know?

Phyllis: Not with me in the picture.

Jack: Would you stop beating on yourself? You happen to be talking about a friend of mine.

Phyllis: I deserve it. I wasn't there for my son when he needed me. I failed my husband. I-I screwed up your campaign. I'm gonna lose my daughter. I mean, she's next in line. How am I gonna ruin her life?!

Jack: Okay, hold on. Hold on. Take a deep breath.

Phyllis: Okay, easy for you to say.

Jack: You are not the walking disaster you claim to be.

Phyllis: Oh, stop it, please! Please, please, I'm so tired of everybody telling me everything's gonna be fine.

Jack: Fine. I'll stop.

Phyllis: I'm sorry. I'm just... running on zero sleep. I'm a little touchy.

Jack: A little?

Phyllis: Yeah, I know, I know.

Jack: You know what? You have every right to be upset. Your son is in some trouble. You don't know if you're gonna be indicted.

Phyllis: I had a nightmare about Nick last night. And then Summer started crying. She's teething right now and...

Jack: Okay, okay, you just-- you need to relax. Enough work. Let's call it a day, huh?

Phyllis: No, no, no, please, please, please, I wanna work. I want to. Please don't send me home. Please.

Michael: All right... tell me how you did it. Tell me how you pulled off that D.N.A. switch.

Gloria: You don't wanna know, Michael.

Kevin: So Fen is playing peek-a-boo with his stuffed animals. You guys gotta see this. What's up, Mikey?

Michael: Were you in on it, too?

Kevin: In on what?

Gloria: Kevin had nothing to do with it. I took care of the D.N.A. problem myself.

Michael: Well... your husband-to-be is not going to stop trying to crack this case.

Gloria: And I'll be there to make sure it stays in one piece, Michael.

Michael: You really care about this man? Do you? Think about how he's gonna feel when he finds out that his new wife has betrayed him. He doesn't take this marriage thing as lightly as some.

Gloria: That's where you're wrong, Michael. I do care about him.

Kevin: Yeah, and then Mom can talk him into dropping the case.

Michael: Oh, yeah. Gloria's one big skill-- talking people into doing things they don't wanna do. It's not gonna work this time.

Gloria: Why not?

Michael: Don't you think it'll look a tad suspicious? And there's one thing you are absolutely not-- that's subtle.

(Crashing sound)

Lily: Dad?

Neil: Hey. Hey, Baby.

Lily: What are you doing here?

Neil: I'm making you something special. No peeking in the kitchen. Come here, girl. Happy birthday!

Lily: Thank you!

Neil: Yeah.

Lily: Oh, are those from you?

Neil: No, they were at the door when I came in.

Lily: Oh.

Neil: There's a card, though.

Lily: Oh, they're from Sharon. That's so sweet. She remembered my birthday.

Neil: Sharon, huh?

Lily: Yeah.

Neil: Your mom's best friend.

Lily: Yeah. It's definitely weird not having Mom here today. She definitely would have something to say to Daniel, that's for sure.

Neil: Oh, you betcha. I can hear her voice now. "You don't respect my daughter! You don't deserve to be married to her!" Can you hear that?

Lily: Oh, yeah, she would've kicked him out on his butt the first time she saw me this upset.

Neil: Oh, yeah, out of, uh, Newman Enterprises.

Lily: Out of town.

Neil: Out of the country.

Lily: Off the planet.

Neil: Out of the solar system.

Lily: Oh, my gosh! Oh...

Neil: Um... speaking of which, I ran into the young man who shall remain nameless a little earlier.

Lily: Mmm, what did he say?

Neil: Nothing but excuses.

Lily: Yeah, you see, that is what I don't get. It's like maybe if he would just own up to it, I could try and get past it.

Neil: Do you wanna get past it?

Lily: I don't know.

Neil: Has he been cheating on you?

Lily: Well, he said he wasn't, but... I don't know what to believe anymore.

Daniel: Oh, what an absolutely craptacular day. You know, first my wife she won't even speak to me, and now your husband-- he wants to put a boot right up my you know what.

Amber: Lauren might fire me.

Daniel: Wait, why?

Amber: Because if I can't get along with Lily at work, then I can't work here.

Daniel: Oh, God. I could kill those "Catwalk" people for what they've done to us.

Amber: I know.

Cane: Hey, Baby.

Amber: Hi.

Cane: What's he doing here?

Daniel: I'm buying a birthday gift for my wife.

Cane: Really? There you go. She'll love it.

Daniel: That's cute. That's real funny. Thanks.

Michael: Hey, everyone. Daniel.

Lauren: Hey, Honey.

Michael: Hey.

Lauren: How you doing?

Michael: Oh, well, um... I thought Lily was working this shift.

Amber: Um, no. Well, we switched shifts.

Michael: Okay. Anyway, I'm glad you're here. I have great news. I got the temporary restraining order against "Catwalk."

Daniel: There is a God!

Amber: Oh, thank you! Oh, my God, you're a genius!

Lauren: My husband, the miracle worker.

Daniel: You know what? I'm gonna call Lily and let her know. She's gonna love hearing this news.

Lauren: Great. Ready to go?

Michael: Uh, almost, almost. Um, may I speak with you privately?

Amber: Well, anything you have to say, you can say in front of them.

Michael: Okay, uh... all right, as soon as the motion was granted, the "Catwalk" producers agreed to a settlement. Now, uh... they will not air the footage if you agree to withdraw from the contest

Amber: They want me to quit? I'm their top contestant!

Michael: They will sign a confidentiality agreement which binds them from discussing any of this matter with the press.

Amber: Is this the only option?

Michael: Uh, at this point, I'd have to say yes.

Amber: Fine. I'm off "Catwalk."

Lauren: Honey, I hate to do this to you, but we have to go.

Michael: All right.

Lauren: Sorry.

Michael: Amber, I'm gonna call you when the papers are ready to sign, all right?

Lauren: Right, Honey.

Amber: I guess it's over.

Daniel: Yeah. It's over except for the part where my wife won't talk to me.

Devon: All right, blow out the candles!

Lily: Whoo!

Neil: Beautiful, Baby.

Lily: You guys, thank you so much for being here. I really appreciate it. I'm glad that you all are here with me.

Devon: Of course.

Lily: So why were you cooking in the kitchen before?

Neil: Shh, shh, shh, top secret. It's in the oven, okay?

Lily: Okay.

Devon: That's gonna be good.

Lily: Knife, please.

Devon: Oh, here you go. But let me take out the candles before you start cutting things.

Lily: Hey, where is this cake from?

Devon: I made the cake.

Korbel: That was the cutest puppy I've ever seen, by the way.

Colleen: Oh, not at night. He was up whining the whole time.

Korbel: I'm sure he's just still getting used to the place.

Neil: What, you, uh, you guys got a new puppy?

Colleen: No, Jack got him for Noah.

Neil: Oh, really?

Colleen: Mm-hmm.

Neil: Hey, maybe that's what we should get Lily--a puppy.

Lily: Uh, no more dogs for me, thank you.

Neil: Okay. (Cell phone ringing)

Lily: Hello? Hi, Mr. Baldwin. Hi. You're kidding me. Oh, that is great news! Thank you so much for calling me! Yes, thank you! You made my day! Okay, thanks! Bye!

Neil: What?

Devon: What happened?

Lily: They pulled the clip from the "Catwalk" web site.

Colleen: That's awesome!

Neil: Cool!

Devon: Very cool!

Neil: Honey, that is the best news.

Lily: Yeah.

Neil: That's wonderful.

Lily: Thanks.

Colleen: You know what? You need to open your presents. And I think that you should open ours first.

Lily: Okay.

Korbel: This one, she agonized for weeks over what to get you.

Colleen: No, no, see, that's not true. It was definitely months. Here you go.

Lily: Thank you.

Devon: Open it up.

Phyllis: Summer's zonked out.

Jack: Well, good. Maybe you can relax now.

Phyllis: Thank you for having us here. I really appreciate it, especially after the way I acted earlier.

Jack: Don't worry about it. I can take that. I'm happy you're here.

Phyllis: I'm truly sorry for ruining your campaign.

Jack: Would you knock this off, please?

Phyllis: Jack, I am terrified of what will happen to my daughter if I go to prison. I'm scared out of my mind. But I deserve to go, you know? I'm the reason Dru died.

Jack: It was an accident. You gotta stop doing this to yourself.

Phyllis: I'm being punished. I am. That's why Nick died.

Jack: Wait, how do you figure that?

Phyllis: I saw Nick. I saw him in my dream. He told me. He told me I'm the reason he died.

Jack: Listen to me right now. That was not Nicholas. Your husband would never say those things to you.

Man: Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, and it is not proud. It's not rude, it's not self-seeking, it's not easily angered, and it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth. It always trusts. It always protects, always hopes, always perseveres.

Will: I, William, take you, Gloria, to be my lawfully wedded wife, my constant friend and my faithful partner from this day forward.

Gloria: In sickness and in health, in joy and in sorrow, in good times and bad. William, I promise to love, honor and respect you, and to cherish you as long as we both shall live.

Man: By the power vested in me by the state of Wisconsin, I now pronounce you husband and wife.

Lily: Hmm, I wonder if this is the CD I kept hinting about.

Devon: Maybe you should open it and find out.

Lily: Okay. "The Wonderful World of Polka Music"?

Devon: That was the best CD they had at the car wash, okay? They have a horrible selection there. They should do something about it.

Lily: Thank you, Devon.

Devon: You're welcome.

Lily: Thank you, I really appreciate it.

Devon: You are welcome.

Neil: Good job, Son. I like that. Good job.

Devon: Thank you.

Lily: Dad!

Devon: I'm joking. Here you go.

Lily: Oh, okay, you better have been joking, 'cause I would've killed you.

Devon: Hope you like that.

Lily: "Happy birthday, Lily. I promise not to leave anymore wet towels on the floor."

Neil: Ew!

Lily: Uh, yeah, like that'll ever happen.

Devon: I will not do that anymore, I promise.

Lily: Yeah, sure.

Neil: I raised you better than that, Son. I know that. I did.

Lily: Aw... Mom's favorite songs. Thank you. That means a lot to me. Thank you.

Devon: Happy birthday.

Lily: Thanks. Ah...

Colleen: You want?

Korbel: Uh, I, uh... mm-hmm. What's another ten minutes on the treadmill?

Neil: Hey... Baby Girl, this is from me to you.

Lily: Aw. Thank you, Dad.

Neil: Mm-hmm.

Lily: I wonder what's in this little box. What? (Gasps) oh, Dad! They're beautiful! Oh, thank you so much. Thank you.

Neil: You're welcome. Happy birthday.

Lily: Look! They're pearls! My birthstone!

Devon: Those are pretty.

Lily: Thanks, Dad.

Neil: You're welcome.

Lily: Where did you get these from?

Lily: Look at the new outfit Colleen bought me.

Colleen: You like it?

Lily: Yes!

Devon: All right, come on, dance with me.

Lily: No!

Devon: Come on!

Neil: Go on.

Devon: It's your birthday. We gotta dance! Come on!

Neil: Go, Lily! Go, Lily!

Amber: How does that look?

Cane: It's great.

Amber: Mmm. (Sighs) I would've won that competition, you know?

Cane: I know. I'm sorry you're so disappointed.

Amber: It's cool. It's okay. I mean, there's a reason why things don't work out, right?

Cane: You know you don't need a TV show. You're talented enough.

Amber: Thanks. And... now I won't have to face everyone after the embarrassment.

Cane: How about you close up the shop early and we go an celebrate?

Amber: I can't. But we could celebrate later.

Cane: All right, I'll hold you to it.

Amber: Bye, Baby.

Amber: Oh, can I-- can I help--oh.

Man: Hello, Amber.

Amber: What are you doing here?

Man: I saw your catfight on "Catwalk." What a riot. I really missed you.

Amber: Well, I didn't miss you.

Man: Come on. We had some chill times together.

Amber: Okay, you see that guy that just walked out the door? That is my husband. I am married.

Man: I heard that. Imagine you... married. Doesn't mean you can't be excited to see an old friend, though.

Lauren: I just love the story of how the two of you met. That you found each other in the bereavement group.

Gloria: William was so good to me when I was grieving for john.

Will: Yeah, I started looking forward to our meetings, because I knew I'd see her there.

Gloria: You never told me that!

Lauren: That's very romantic.

Michael: Mm-hmm.

Kevin: It's a perfect first date. I wanna meet my future wife in a graveyard.

Gloria: Oh, Kevin!

Woman: From the gentlemen at the bar.

Gloria: Oh, thank you.

Michael: Who is that?

Kevin: That's Mom's friend, the sailor.

Lauren: I told you about him.

Michael: Oh, yeah.

Gloria: "Congratulations. All the best, Evan."

Will: How thoughtful.

Evan: Miss? Could you, uh... do me a big favor? Would you write your name and number on that piece of paper?

Woman: Can I ask why?

Evan: You'll see. Just for fun.

Evan: Okay... now put it back in here.

Kevin: Are you driving?

Lauren: No, I'll drive.

Michael: No, I'm not driving.

Lauren: No, and you're not drinking anymore either.

Michael: Fine.

Lauren: Here. Okay.

Evan: That's it.

Lauren: Let's get you nice and clear.

Evan: Watch.

[Will watches Evan do his disappearing trick with a pen.]

[Will remembering]

Gloria: Everything you need to know is right there? Ha!

[Gloria switches the test tube by a slight of hand]

Phyllis: Thank you. When my daughter is 17 and misses curfew, are you gonna talk me off the ledge?

Jack: Oh, she's gonna be calling me telling me, "My mother doesn't understand me."

Phyllis: Aw, that's dangerous. You know way too much about me.

Jack: Yeah, you're gonna have to be nice to me. You're tired. You just need some sleep.

Phyllis: No. I'm not going to sleep again. I'm gonna stay up. I don't wanna have that dream again. And if I do go to sleep, I don't wanna wake up alone.

Jack: You don't have to go home. Stay here with me.

Next on "The Young and the Restless"...

Kevin: Better get used to my couch, Buddy. You're gonna be there a while.

Brad: Well, as long as we're going to be working together, we should try and be civil.

Victoria: Why don't you just try taking your own advice?

Phyllis: Is anything of what Lily said on that video true?

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