Y&R Transcript Thursday 4/26/07

Y&R Transcript Thursday 4/26/07 -- Canada; Friday 4/27/07 -- U.S.A.

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Provided By Amanda
Proofread By Emma

(Telephone ringing)

Lauren: Honey? Honey, could you get that, please?

Michael: Got it! Got it!

Lauren: Okay.

Michael: Notice how the female primate preps her habitat in anticipation of the mating ritual.

Lauren: This is for Phyllis, King Kong. Who was that? Who was that on the phone?

Michael: Manicurist confirming.

Lauren: Oh, good, good, good! Good, good, good, thank you.

Michael: I told her to bring all her latest spring colors. I don't know how I'll ever choose.

Lauren: Oh, my goodness, you're... distracting. Okay, so I've got, uh, the champagne. I've got the sparkling cider. I've got the quiche in the oven. I've got the facialist. I've got the manicurist. Who do you think you are?

Michael: I'm hungry. Pleased to meet you.

Lauren: No, no, no, no, no. You are a man. You get to eat the food that's in the refrigerator. The women get to eat all the pretty party stuff.

Michael: You know, it's nice you're doing all this for Phyllis.

Lauren: Every woman deserves an extravagant bridal shower. What time did I tell the masseuse to come?

Michael: A masseuse? You know... mmm, nothing helps a male primate prepare for a deposition like a nice rubdown.

Lauren: You know what? I'm gonna make a deal with you.

Michael: Oh?

Lauren: And that deal is, if you can stay out of trouble for five minutes-- you don't eat anything, you don't touch anything-- five minutes-- I will personally paint your toes and rub you down later.

Michael: Oh?

Lauren: But right now, today, it's Phyllis' turn to relax.

Michael: A tranquilizer dart won't get Phyllis to relax. Come on, Nick knows she kept this Brad/Sharon thing a secret.

Lauren: I know, I know, and that's why we are playing the role of supportive friends today, all right? Nick loves her. They have a baby. There's no way he's gonna cancel this wedding.

Michael: Objection. Calls for a conclusion.

Phyllis: Hey, Baby. Um, I'm with Gina right now talking about the, uh, reception. I thought you were gonna be here.

Nick: I can't make it. I have an emergency meeting.

Phyllis: Okay. I mean, with whom? About what?

Nick: T-shirt sales online. I'm thinking either... black shirts with white logos or white shirts with black logos. Or we could just be aggressive and do both. What do you think?

Phyllis: Yeah, you're real hands-on.

Nick: Yeah, I'd like to think so.

Phyllis: Okay, well, um, I'll decide on my own. And, um... if you see Victoria, uh, be sure to tell her about Laurenís spa day. Remind her, okay?

Nick: Sure. Right.

Victoria: What's the groom-to-be doing here?

Nick: I thought I'd sit in on the meeting.

Victoria: Oh, really? Pension plans excite you that much?

Nick: They do. What about you and Brad? Phyllis told me about that thing at Laurenís.

Victoria: Yeah, well, I'm taking the pension meeting solo. I uninvited my husband.

Nick: Hey, why don't you uninvite him to be your husband?

Victoria: I told you. It's not happening. Why don't you get out of here? Go surprise your wife. Take her some flowers at Laurenís or something. At least one of the Newman siblings is happy.

Nick: There must be some secret sibling I don't know about. (Sighs) because honestly, Vick, I donít... know how I can walk down the aisle with a woman I can't trust.

Colleen: What are you doing?

Korbel: Covering my assets.

Colleen: You know, I dreamt that I was with the curator for the musťe de reinard and, uh... he was telling me why you didn't get the job. Only it was in some made up language, 'cause I couldn't understand what he was saying.

Korbel: Well, I'm sure I speak any language he does and I can't understand it. So I'm just making sure my e-mail program pulled back the resignation letter I submitted yesterday.

Colleen: And?

Korbel: Success.

Colleen: Yay. Hey, um, can you sue an employer for yanking a job offer?

Korbel: Yeah, sure. If you wanna ruin your reputation.

Colleen: I saw the whole thing in my mind. You at the museum, me at the Sorbonne, us living on the Ile St. Louis.

Korbel: If you see it, you can achieve it? Not this time, I'm afraid.

Colleen: So that's it? It's just over?

Korbel: If they found a more qualified candidate, then yeah... it's over.

Colleen: There isn't a more qualified candidate.

Korbel: Youíre biased.

David: You're already married?

Jack: Yes. It's my decision to make.

David: It was a decision that you should've cleared with me.

Jack: Not in this case. This is personal.

Victor: Jack, politics is personal.

David: And to put it bluntly, Jack, you went off and married the current queen of the tabloids.

Victor: Look, there's gotta be a way to put a positive spin on all this.

Jack: I agree. The public has had it up to here with the press hounding candidates about their private lives. I refuse to have a secret wife.

David: All right, let me reframe this for you, Jack. Political spouses are carefully molded. Sharon and those photos on the cliffs? Unmoldable, Jack. And unmoldable is not what we want right now.

Phyllis: Wow, this is gonna be fun!

Lauren: Oh, yeah! That's the idea.

Phyllis: Uh-huh.

Lauren: Do you want some bubbly now? You wanna wait?

Phyllis: No, no, no, I-- we'll wait. We'll wait.

Lauren: Okay. You all right?

Phyllis: Mm-hmm. I'm great. I'm great. Last minute, you know, bridal jitters.

Lauren: Mm-hmm. Well, today is all about relaxing.

Phyllis: That's right. That's right. I'm gonna relax.

Lauren: Right. Don't worry about a thing.

Phyllis: I won't. Worry free. Worry free.

Lauren: Yep, worry free.

Michael: Here comes the bride!

Phyllis: Hey!

Michael: Hey! All ready to be buffed and painted into submission?

Phyllis: Oh, of course! Of course! What about you?

Lauren: Oh, he's already buff.

Michael: Yes, I'm only submissive when the occasion calls for it.

Lauren: That's right.

Phyllis: Aw. Okay. Are you gonna stay?

Michael: Uh, no, unfortunately, I've heard that a man named Fabio is about to jump out of a cake wearing nothing more than a manly smile. And I find that degrading to my sex.

Lauren: Bad news. Bad news. Fabio is fluish.

Phyllis: Oh, thank God.

Michael: Ah! (Humming)

Lauren: What are you doing?

Michael: What a guy does for a friend...

Phyllis: (Giggles) what are you doing? You could be disbarred for that, you know?

Michael: I've been thrown out of a bar for much less, my lady.

Phyllis: Oh, no!

Michael: Oh, yes!

Phyllis: I really wish you would stay and do more of that.

Lauren: Really?

Michael: I believe that's called the fox in the hen house.

Phyllis: No, I mean it. I actually do want you to stay.

Michael: And, uh, the hostess says?

Lauren: Well, whatever the bride wants, the bride gets, but he must keep his clothes on. Please keep your clothes on.

Michael: Oh. Really?

Lauren: Yes! Really!

Phyllis: You were hot.

Brad: Bonjour. That's 1/10th of my French. How goes the Paris plans?

Colleen: What plans? The museum reneged on Adrianís job.

Brad: Why?

Colleen: We don't know. He thinks that maybe they wanted to hire somebody else last minute.

Brad: Oh. I'm sorry, Honey. I can see how disappointed you are.

Colleen: It's worse for him. Dad, heís... he gets the opportunity of a lifetime and then it's just yanked away without any reason or...

Brad: Yeah, pretty maddening, huh?

Colleen: Well, for us. We thought that you might be happy since you hate him.

Brad: Look, I don't, uh, dislike the guy. I dislike the fact that he's involved with you. I certainly don't want you going off to Paris with him.

Colleen: We weren't even gonna leave until the end of the semester. I mean, there's so much time for change. There's so many museums and you know how brilliant he is.

Brad: As long as he knows how brilliant you are.

Colleen: He does.

Brad: Good.

Colleen: You and Victoria-- you're so happy and right for each other. But you know, sometimes, you have a connection with someone that people think is so wrong for you. But it doesn't take the feeling away, Dad. And that's how I feel about Adrian. I just, I really want you to just try-- just try and understand that.

Sharon: You have to find a way to understand. Sam is not going to be upset with you because you weren't at his birthday party. Your father is getting married tomorrow.

Noah: Tomorrow. This is just a stupid practice and a stupid practice dinner.

Sharon: Well, it's not stupid to your father or to Phyllis.

Noah: How many kids will be there?

Sharon: You, maybe Summer and Fen.

Noah: They're not kids, Mom. They're babies. I'll be the only kid there.

Sharon: Noah...

Noah: Please, Mom, Sam is my best friend. I know how to be a best man. I did it for Jack, remember?

Sharon: Well, sometimes you have do things for other people because it's important to them.

Noah: Maybe I don't want to.

Sharon: All right, maybe you shouldn't be talking this way.

Noah: Who wants to stand in a church for a billion hours? It's stupid!

Sharon: Well, you're going and that's final. I'm sorry.

Noah: No, you're not. Sam's gonna be mad at me and you don't care!

Sharon: Sam will understand.

Noah: At least it really is his birthday. Dad and Phyllis are already married.

Nick: East coast sales quarterly reports.

Victoria: How's it looking?

Nick: Real flat.

Victoria: Oh, lucky us! Uh, listen, thank you for taking the teleconference. The pension brigade waits for no one. What were you saying before? About Phyllis?

Nick: Nothing. Catch you later.

Victoria: No, Nick! Why don't you tell me what's really going on? I'm older, okay? That means you have to tell me.

Nick: Where's the logic in that?

Victoria: I'm your sister, you have to tell me.

Nick: You're gonna keep going, aren't you?

Victoria: I'm better looking, you have to tell me.

Nick: Wow! Um, I'm gonna need a ballot recount on that.

Victoria: Then would you just tell me?

Nick: All right. It's Phyllis.

Victoria: Let me guess. She slept with my husband, too?

Nick: Oh, not funny. Uh, she knew about Brad and Sharon.

Victoria: And she didn't tell me? Why?

Nick: There's just no easy way to--to say it. It was... strategy.

Victoria: Oh. I guess it all makes sense now. Why Brad supported the development and why she got so upset when he bought all those properties along the lake. She was blackmailing him, wasn't she?

Nick: She told Brad if he didn't vote with me, then she was gonna tell you everything.

Victoria: Brad did everything he could do to protect that secret. Do you know how much that disgusts me?

Nick: I'm assuming that's a rhetorical question?

Victoria: He made up so many stories about what he did. Finally... finally, it makes some sense. (Sighs) when did you find out?

Nick: Yesterday.

Victoria: And let me guess-- Phyllis just threw herself on your mercy.

Nick: Something like that. Look, I know you're upset--

Victoria: Upset? Upset? Why would I be upset? Just because you're marrying her tomorrow and-- and I'm her bridesmaid?

Nick: Look... I will deal with her, all right? You've got your own stuff to deal with right now.

Victoria: No, I have a better idea for you. You deal your way, and I'll deal mine.

Colleen: I'm on my break. Do you want to, um, go for a walk or something?

Korbel: I just can't make sense of it. Why would the museum offer me the job and then take it back?

Colleen: I don't know. Even my dad was shocked.

Korbel: Shocked and doing his happy dance-- not the same thing. (Cell phone ringing)

Korbel: Roger, hi. Oh, fine, thanks, how are you? Uh, listen, did you apply for the research position at the musťe de reinard? No? Oh, I'm just curious. Yeah, thinking about throwing my hat in the ring. Uh, Jean-Paul? Oh, no, go ahead. I'm writing it down. Uh-huh. Thanks. Thanks, Roger. I definitely owe you a drink at the annual. Okay, bye.

Colleen: Roger is who?

Korbel: An old colleague, now at the Getty. One of the few people who knows more about medieval antiquities than I do.

Colleen: Hm, he didn't apply?

Korbel: No, but he referred me to an old friend who's now the curator at the Reinard.

Colleen: Well, you know, maybe we can finally figure out what happened and at least have some sort of peace of mind.

Korbel: That is exactly what I am after.

Lauren: Well, hello!

Nikki: Hi, Lauren! I am so sorry that I am late.

Lauren: I'm glad you're here.

Nikki: I was doing an interview with the "Chronicle." I could not get the woman off the phone. Hi!

Phyllis: Hey, Nikki. Uh, we are, uh, picking out nail--nail polish. Um, it's very, very important.

Michael: Lauren, I need your help in here! Something's dying in the oven! Now!

Lauren: Excuse me.

Nikki: You excited?

Phyllis: Yeah, I am excited. I am. I know its--its silly, but...

Nikki: No, it isnít. I've married Victor more than once and every time it's more and more exciting.

Phyllis: Yeah. Right. Well, I would marry Nick every year if I could.

Nikki: I am glad that you're doing this.

Phyllis: Really?

Nikki: I never thought I'd see my son smile again after Cassie passed away, but you were able to do that. And for that, I am grateful.

Phyllis: Thank you. Well, why don't we celebrate? I'll open the bubbly and, um, we can get started and let Victoria catch up.

Nikki: Okay, great. That would be champagne for you and sparkling cider for me.

Phyllis: Oh, okay.

Nikki: I'll do the honors.

Michael: Tada! (Doorbell rings)

Phyllis: I'll get that.

Victoria: You knew... that Brad slept with Sharon and you didn't tell me.

Phyllis: Yes, I knew. But listen--

Victoria: There is no but, Phyllis.

Nikki: Did I hear this right? You knew that Brad had an affair with Sharon and you kept that a secret from Victoria?

Lauren: Oh, we'll be in the kitchen.

Michael: In the kitchen.

Phyllis: Listen, I would appreciate if you gave me a chance to explain.

Victoria: Sure. You can start with how you coerced Brad into voting your way on the development.

Nikki: Oh, my God! You fixed the vote?!

Phyllis: No, I-I... listen, what I did was to support my husband.

Victoria: Don't you dare blame this on my brother. Don't do that.

Phyllis: No, I'm not! I'm not blaming this on your brother, but I knew that he would do a great job at managing the development.

Nikki: So that's your excuse?

Victoria: I asked you, in so many words, sister-in-law to sister-in-law, if there was anything that I needed to know about my husband.

Phyllis: Listen, I told you the truth. And this was between you and Brad--which it is.

Victoria: Which it was. Until you got involved and used it to get what you want.

Phyllis: Okay, wait a second! If Brad and Sharon hadn't slept together, none of this would've happened in the first place!

Nikki: Oh, my God, are you on a roll! The next thing you're gonna say is that it's my fault! What about Lauren and Michael out there? Is it their fault, too? Everybody's guilty but you, is that it?

Phyllis: Okay, wait a second! I'm gonna take the heat for this?! There's plenty of blame to go around here, okay? I mean, are you-- are you kidding me?! You two are gonna look at me and tell me that you've never kept a secret before?

Victoria: You are a horrible person.

Nikki: You have messed with the wrong family. There is no way we're gonna stand up for you at that ceremony.

Phyllis: Okay, wait-- okay, stop it! You Guys, come on! You're not gonna pull out of this. I made a mistake. I admit it. I am so sorry about it. But I'm worried about how this will hurt Nick if it affects the wedding!

Nikki: I would worry about a little bit more than that if I were you. Like whether you're gonna keep the Newman name.

Sharon: Look... I know you don't wanna go to this. If it were me, I wouldn't wanna go either. But... this is just something you have to do.

Noah: Who's the boss of me? You or Dad?

Sharon: We both are. Well, okay, when you're here with me, I'm the boss. And when you're with your dad--

Noah: I'm not at Dadís. Which makes you the boss of me. Tell him I'm not going.

Nick: Let me guess. Second thoughts about your wedding?

Jack: Uh, not for a moment.

Nick: Have you thought, uh, about what this is gonna do to your campaign?

Jack: What, are you and my campaign manager on mind meld?

Nick: Once it gets out that you're married to Sharon, those photos on the cliff are gonna become front page news. That can't be good for you or for Sharon. (Cell phone ringing)

Jack: Is that me?

Nick: No, that's me. Excuse me. Oh, speaking of... hey, Sharon, I'm here with your husband.

Sharon: Oh. Right.

Nick: What's up? I was just about to come get Noah.

Sharon: Um, you know, he's not ready to go yet. And he says he doesn't wanna go to the rehearsal.

Noah: Tell Dad you're the boss of me.

Sharon: I could use your help.

Nick: Okay, I'm on my way.

Jack: Noah?

Nick: Yeah, he doesn't wanna come to the rehearsal.

Jack: You can't really blame him, can you?

Nick: Well, he needs to know that he can't always get what he wants. You know, Sharon told me that you were really great with him after Dru died.

Jack: I care a great deal about that kid. Just as I cared about you when you were my stepson.

Nick: And the world goes 'round, huh?

Jack: Yeah, never quite the way we imagined it would.

Nick: Yeah. Well, I better get to Noah. You know, I'm thinking that maybe... you could help me?

Victor: I know that look. What are you angry about?

Nikki: Anger doesn't begin to cover it. Brad slept with Sharon.

Victor: How did you find out?

Nikki: Victoria. She asked me not to tell you. Maybe I shouldn't have. But for him to put her in the position of being so humiliated she can't even tell her father!

Victor: I always knew that man was a low-life. A no good S.O.B.

Nikki: I wish she had never laid eyes on him.

Victor: He messed with the wrong woman.

Michael: I feel terrible for her.

Lauren: We might need a scorecard just to follow what's going on.

Michael: Well, I believe the recipe was for loving, lying and leaving.

Phyllis: This is great. This is great. This is great. I love this! This is gorgeous! Look at that! Gorgeous!

Lauren: Very nice.

Phyllis: She's an artist.

Lauren: I put a tip on the credit card for you.

Michael: Thanks.

Lauren: Thank you so much.

Phyllis: (Sighs) yeah, I like this. I like this a lot. This is really, really good. This is blushing bride pink. I went with blushing bride pink.

Lauren: Good, yeah.

Michael: Oh, that's a great choice. It's beautiful.

Lauren: Very nice.

Phyllis: Yeah. Yeah, this is terrific. Not that I'm gonna be a blushing bride. But... this looks good. You knew about this, right? You knew even before Victoria came, right?

Lauren: Uh, well, yes.

Phyllis: Yeah. It's okay that you told her. It's fine. You did this for me anyway.

Lauren: Of course I did.

Michael: Hey... people make mistakes.

Phyllis: I have exceeded my mistake quota.

Lauren: Phyllis, Nick will forgive you.

Phyllis: Yeah? Like I forgave you for not telling me about Sheila? How long did that take?

Michael: Look, look, you're here. We're here. We're all here. We're all good. Huh?

Phyllis: Yeah, we're good! We're all good. Everyone's good. Besides Daniel, you're the only family I have. I'm losing my mind! Okay... three ifís. If we can get the quickest bridesmaid's dress alteration in history and if you can get a matching tie to match that-- that bridesmaid's dress and if, um, Nick wants to show up at the wedding, I-I would love it if the two of you stood beside me at the altar.

Lauren: There is no other place we'd rather be. Honestly. Come here, Sweetie.

Nick: Hey, Dude. What's going on?

Noah: Nothing. I'm staying here.

Sharon: I told Noah that sometimes we do things for the people we love even though we don't wanna do them.

Noah: Well, if you love me, you should do what I want.

Jack: Uh, Buddy, you remember that little man to man chat we had the other day?

Noah: Yeah.

Jack: When we called Abby and she talked to you?

Noah: Yeah.

Jack: I don't know what Abby was doing at the time, but she got right on the phone because it was important to you. That's what family does-- they're there for you. Listen, I gotta get back to the office. I know you're gonna do the right thing. Talk to your parents. They're not only smart, they're actually pretty cool, for parents. I'll see you later, huh?

Noah: Can I talk to Dad, man to man?

Sharon: Oh, sure. Yeah, go ahead.

Noah: I don't wanna go because Phyllis isn't my family.

Nick: A stepmother is family, just like a stepfather. It's kinda like having four parents.

Noah: No offense, Dad, but that's stupid. You can't make yourself love someone.

Nick: That's true.

Noah: All I wanted was two parents and one big sister. Together.

Nick: I know. Come here. I know.

Korbel: (Speaking French)

Colleen: Um... I only caught, like, about a tenth of that. Vachement?

Korbel: It's slang, for really. That position is still open. They haven't hired anyone else. Which is vachement strange.

Victor: Bradley.

Brad: Victor.

Victor: The moment you married my daughter you jeopardized my family. We put our lives on the line for you.

Brad: I'll always be grateful for that, Victoria.

Victor: Really? Cheating on my daughter? That's how you show your gratitude?!

[Victor punches Brad]

Brad: Victor, I'm sorry.

Victor: Really?

Brad: If I could go back and change things, I would. I love Victoria.

Victor: You don't know the meaning of the word. Now you hurt my daughter, you hurt me. That's a very bad choice.

Victoria: If I weren't pregnant, there'd be a lot of rum in here.

Nikki: Yeah, no kidding. Phyllis could drive anybody to drink.

Victoria: Okay. So, out with it. I know there's something you wanna tell me.

Nikki: I told your father that Brad slept with Sharon.

Victoria: Mom! Mom, I asked you not to!

Nikki: I know you did. I know. But I thought about it. And your father risked his life for that man. I thought he had the right to know.

Victoria: That was a bad idea.

Nikki: I'm sorry. At least I didn't tell him about the blackmail.

Victoria: Well, why not? Why not, Mom? You talked to him about everything else.

Nikki: If it wasn't for Phyllis' coercion, Clear Springs would be dead.

Victoria: So you think we should keep it a secret in case we need it later?

Nikki: Look, I have slept next to the master manipulator for many years. I learned from the best. If I win this election, great. If Jack wins, maybe this secret might have to go public. They wanna play dirty, we can play dirtier. In fact, I have half a mind to call my friend at the "Chronicle" and have her talk to the city clerk about recent marriage licenses.

Victoria: You are good.

Nikki: Well, you don't think you got it all from your father, do you?

Victoria: All right, that's the big picture. We still have the rehearsal and we still have the wedding from hell tomorrow.

Nikki: Oh, I think short term, too. And I have an idea.

David: Thanks for agreeing to this.

Sharon: The only reason I did is because you said it was about Jack's campaign.

David: I won't stay long. I promise. Very nice. Congratulations on the wedding. You married a really good man.

Sharon: What can I do for you, David?

David: Ask not what you can do for me, ask what you can do for your husband.

Sharon: Which is?

David: We both want the same thing, Sharon, which is Jack to win this election. True?

Sharon: True.

David: Well, we all have our different roles to play in order for that to happen. Campaign manager, for instance. Political wife. Only in this particular campaign, your best role is to not be one.

Victoria: What happened to you?

Brad: Courtesy of your father. I thought you'd be at Laurenís.

Victoria: Silly me. I thought that you would come by to, uh, to confess the rest of the Brad and Sharon story. That part about the blackmail.

Brad: I won't insult you by denying it.

Victoria: You know, one night of passion with Sharon I can--I can understand that, even though it makes me sick to my stomach to think about. But letting Phyllis extort a vote from you? Instead of being man enough to tell me what happened? That's just incomprehensible.

Brad: I didn't wanna hurt you.

Victoria: Well, now you really are hurting me.

Brad: It's the truth.

Victoria: The truth? You wouldn't know the truth if your life depended on it. Wait, hold on. Make that your marriage.

Phyllis: (Sighs) well no one's here. This is not good.

Lauren: All right, all right, well, maybe, you know, everyone's late.

Michael: Yeah. Maybe they are.

Phyllis: Yeah, maybe they are. If you define late as not showing up.

Brad: Monsieur Dupre, uh, this is Brad Carlton in Genoa City. I recently donated a piece to your museum. If you could call me back as soon as you get this message, I would appreciate it. It's important. Merci.

Phyllis: This is...

Lauren: You know, I think I'd better, uh--

Michael: Go find the minister.

Lauren: Hey, right!

Michael: And I'll help you.

Lauren: Would you?

Michael: Let's go check.

Lauren: Back here? We'll be--

Michael: Right back.

Phyllis: Okay.

Phyllis: Hey, uh... I'm at the church and I was just wondering if, um...

Nick: I'm already here.

Phyllis: Hi.

Nick: Hi.

Phyllis: So, um... everyone's late, I guess, and Daniel's sick. How you doing?

Noah: Hi, I'm doing good.

Phyllis: Good.

Nick: I thought I'd bring little man down here to show him what he's gonna do tomorrow. Then he has to make an appearance at a very important birthday party--the big 1-0.

Phyllis: Wow. Double digits. That's pretty impressive. You're gonna be back, right?

Nick: I'll be back.

Nick: So you're probably gonna stand down here, you know, and walk down the aisle with somebody. Maybe Chewbacca. That'll be fun.

Noah: That'd be cool.

Nick: Yeah, exactly.

David: You are gonna be the perfect political wife, Sharon. You're beautiful, intelligent, but most of all, you're very gracious. Now if those photos didn't exist--

Sharon: But they do. I get it.

David: After Jack wins, we'll announce the two of you are married. But until-- (door opens)

Sharon: Jack!

Jack: Strategizing with my bride now, David?

Sharon: Yes, David was just giving me some ideas about you and me.

Jack: I'd be fascinated to carry on that conversation. In private. Was there anything else, David?

David: Not a thing. I guess I'll be on my way. Take care, Sharon.

Jack: I'll call you later.

Jack: Now let me guess. Did his "good point" maybe include the word "hide" in front of the words "our marriage?"

Sharon: Maybe you should listen to him.

Jack: Kennedy didn't listen when he talked about his religion. Reagan didn't listen when he was shaking the hands of the masses in red square. I think that moment needs a soundtrack. Come on, laugh a little. I am not going to pretend that I am single when I am married to such an amazing woman. It ain't gonna happen.

Sharon: What if you change your mind?

Jack: I'm not gonna change my mind. I'm gonna be Stonewall Jackson on this one. We are gonna prove David wrong.

Sharon: How?

Jack: By being a family. You, me and Noah-- we are a family. It's about time we started acting like one. I want you to move into Abbott Manor. Today.

Nikki: There. I knew she would be here.

Victoria: Nothing like a common enemy to reunite my parents.

Victor: I'm sorry, okay? When are you gonna divorce him?

Nikki: Victor, she doesn't wanna talk about that, all right?

Victor: I wanna talk about it.

Victoria: You shouldn't have hit him, Dad.

Victor: Sweetheart, he deserved that.

Victoria: Why don't you just take care of your own marriage. Stay outta mine.

Nikki: What's she talking about?

Phyllis: Hey. Victoria, you're here.

Victoria: Yeah, I'm here for my brother, not for you.

Nikki: Where's Nicholas?

Phyllis: Um, he took Noah to a big 10-year-old birthday party. He'll be back.

Victoria: You sure about that?

Phyllis: Yes, I am sure about that. Thank you for asking. I thank you all for coming. I know it's been a very difficult day.

Michael: Hey, hey, um, we finally found the minister.

Phyllis: Good! Good!

Michael: No, uh, bad. He's with his chiropractor.

Phyllis: What? No?

Nikki: Oh.

Lauren: He threw his back out.

Nikki: Oh, well, then there can't be a rehearsal.

Victoria: Good.

Phyllis: No! No! Yes! Yes, there's a rehearsal! There's a rehearsal! Give him-- give him what he needs-- pain medication! Pain medication!

Michael: All right, Phyllis, Phyllis, calm down, all right? I will call him again. And, uh, remember... bad dress rehearsal, good show, right? Okay.

Phyllis: I'm not entirely sure of that.

Next on "The Young and the Restless"...

Kevin: Listen to Michael and stay away from William.

Gloria: I'm not giving up on him now.

Jack: I can't believe you did this!

Sharon: You call this damage control?

David: All right, now wait a minute...

Victor: Darling, this is very personal.

Nikki: It's politics. It's not personal.

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