Thursday Y&R Transcript 9/30/04

Y&R Transcript Thursday 9/30/04 -- Canada, Friday 10/01/04 -- U.S.A.

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By Eric
Proofread by Emma

Nikki: Admit it, Ashley, you were disappointed when I came through the door just now.

Ashley: I have no idea what you're talking about.

Nikki: You were hoping that you could spend the afternoon with Victor, with your child, almost like a real family.

Ashley: You know, I assumed you'd be here. That was part of the plan, wasn't it?

Nikki: Yes, it was, until I realized I was swamped at the office.

Ashley: And why aren't you at the office, Nikki?

Nikki: I rearranged things. I changed my schedule.

Ashley: I bet you did. Let me guess when. As soon as you found out that Brad had a meeting out of town. You're so transparent.

Nikki: Meaning what?

Ashley: We both know why you're here. It's not because you want to get to know Abby better. It's not because you want to give her a present. It's because you can't stand the thought of Victor and me spending some time with our little girl.

Nikki: "Our little girl." Wait. I'm confused. Sometimes she's Brad's little girl, sometime she's Victor's little girl.

Ashley: Oh, please.

Nikki: Which is it?

Ashley: You know what I meant.

Nikki: It's a good thing Brad wasn't around to hear that little slip of the tongue.

Ashley: Don't turn this around and make it about me.

Nikki: I don't have to, Ashley. You already have. From the moment you impregnated yourself with Victor's child without his knowledge, it has only been about one person, and I'm looking at her.

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Dru: Okay, um, Phyllis, may we have some time alone, please?

Phyllis: Um, why don't you use the conference room? I'm busy.

Diane: Phyllis, it's two against one. You should go.

Phyllis: I really don't care if it's ten against one, I'm staying put.

Dru: Well, so am I.

Phyllis: Hey, hey, hey. Drucilla, get your...

Dru: Huh?

Phyllis: Get your butt off of my folders.

Dru: Oh, make me. Come and get 'em, honey.

Phyllis: Can you see how very unprofessional you're being right now?

Dru: Now how unprofessional were you to clutter up our office space?

Phyllis: Those are important folders, Drucilla, okay? Give 'em to me.

Dru: Oh, well, um, maybe you shouldn't have put them in my space. This is my real estate, my side of the office.

Phyllis: There's no "my side of the office." We share the office, Drucilla. Get up off of the folders.

Dru: You know, I'm so sorry, Diane, that you have to listen to this childish rhetoric.

Diane: Oh, I'm not surprised, Drucilla. Phyllis has never learned to play nice.

Dru: No, let's not let her play in our sandbox.

Diane: Let's not.

Dru: Anyway, I had this extraordinary idea that dovetailed into the comments that you made...

Diane: That I made.

Dru: That I think were so awesome. I have this incredible idea that if we--ohh! Ohh! Oh. Oh.

Phyllis: Oh, oh, oh, my. Oh, my gosh. May I have my folders, Drucilla? Thank you very much, Phyllis.

Dru: Ow. Ow.

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Jill: I cannot believe that you just asked me to marry you.

Elliot: I can't think of a better way to convince you that what I'm feeling is real.

Jill: Don't you think that method's a little extreme?

Elliot: No, I don't, because I love you. Don't you realize that?

Jill: Well, you're certainly acting like you're in love.

Elliot: No, I'm not acting. But you're not sure about that.

Jill: I don't know, Elliot. This is so fast, and you keep upping the ante. Every time I have a question or an issue, you just keep raising the stakes to some higher level. And now you're asking me to marry you? You're asking me to believe that you have fallen in love with me in this short a time?

Elliot: Is that so unlikely?

Jill: Maybe it's not. Or maybe it's just your way of throwing me off the trail.

Elliot: Okay. Forget it. I never dreamed that this would be your reaction. We don't have to get married. Okay?

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John: (Chuckles)

Gloria: (Giggles)

John: Good morning.

Gloria: Is it still? It seems like, what, with one thing and another, it should be afternoon by now.

John: Oh, one thing and another indeed.

Gloria: What if someone sees us?

John: So what if they do? I mean, we're not exactly having a clandestine affair.

Gloria: Good. I wouldn't want to have to go sneaking around.

John: Oh, no need.

Gloria: Still, I think there will be some reactions.

John: Oh, now you listen...

Gloria: What?

John: My dear, sweet lovely, I couldn't care less. You know, if anybody gives you the slightest bit of grief, or even looks at you cross-eyed, I will come down in your defense like rolling thunder from as high as Mt. Everest.

Gloria: Ooh! I want to see that.

John: Yeah, I can be pretty ferocious if want to be.

Gloria: That I already know. Now how about some coffee?

John: Yeah.

Gloria: I'll go see if Mrs. Martinez is still in the kitchen.

John: Okay. Oh, wait, wait.

Gloria: What?

John: I think she said she's going to see her sister today.

Gloria: Oh, well, then I'll just make it myself.

John: (Chuckles)

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Gina: Hello, Michael. Table for one?

Michael: Actually, I'm meeting someone.

Gina: Hmm. I wonder if it's the charming Ms. Fenmore.

Michael: I'd tell ya, but then I'd have to kill ya.

Gina: (Chuckles) you know, it's funny, I haven't seen Paul and Lauren around lately.

Michael: Fancy that.

Gina: Well, you're no fun, counselor. You know, I wonder what Laurenís secret is. She just seems to have all the men flockin' around her.

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Kevin: Hi. I got your message.

Lauren: Thank you for coming.

Kevin: Are you kidding? I couldn't get over here fast enough. So did you, uh, like my surprise I bet it's not every day you get showered with rose petals.

Lauren: Uh, yeah, that's for sure.

Kevin: Cool, huh? I got it from, uh, from that movie.

Lauren: And it was a very interesting idea, but you really shouldn't have done it.

Kevin: Okay. So I know that I'm going a little overboard lately, but, um, but I just want to show you every day how-- how beautiful and amazing I think you are.

Lauren: And that's very flattering. But I want you to stop.

Kevin: Stop...

Lauren: No more romantic gesture-- no presents, no poems, no flowers.

Kevin: Aww, you don't want me spending my money.

Lauren: No. That's not why. Kevin, we have talked about this before. (Sighs) I care about you, and I hope that we're always gonna be friends, but I don't feel the same way that you do.

Kevin: But--but you just said that you care about me. Isn't that how a great relationship starts?

Lauren: Not for us. I have no interest in a romantic relationship with you. Do you understand me?

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Dru: Have you lost your natural mind, Phyllis? I could've been hurt.

Phyllis: The only thing that's hurt is your ego.

Diane: Are you okay?

Dru: I think so. I might have to have you arrested, though.

Phyllis: Oh, wh--arrested? For what?

Dru: Assault.

Phyllis: Assault?

Dru: Mm-hmm.

Phyllis: Give me a break.

Dru: You have gone too far, Phyllis.

Phyllis: I'm sorry. I asked you very nicely, "give me my folders." I gave you every chance to do it.

Dru: You know what? I'm gonna have to kick your butt.

Diane: Oh, Drucilla! Drucilla, just stop. Don't waste your time.

Dru: You know what? You're right. I don't wanna break a sweat on her.

Diane: No. No. And besides, as soon as we win this contest, Phyllis will be back in that little broom closet you told me about.

Dru: Yeah, we're gonna have all this real estate for us.

Phyllis: Whoa, whoa. Hold the phone. Hold the phone. "We"? You're in on this? What makes you think you're gonna win this contest?

Diane: Oh, Phyllis, please. Come on. You're practically famous for shooting yourself in the foot.

Dru: Yeah.

Phyllis: I'm sorry, but don't you work at Jabot? Don't you have an office there?

Diane: Yeah, so?

Phyllis: So why don't you go trot on back to Jabot and annoy the people there?

Dru: Hey! Whoa.

Phyllis: Hey.

Dru: Do not talk to my executive assistant that way.

Phyllis: Executive assis-- oh, boy. Let me tell you something, girls. You couldn't screw in a light bulb if you tried.

Dru: I'm gonna leave that one alone.

Phyllis: Mm-hmm.

Dru: Yeah.

Phyllis: Why don't you use the conference room, okay? Use the conference room. Say I'll owe you one.

Dru: No, thank you. Why don't you go use the conference room, Phyllis?

Phyllis: I'm sorry. I have my executive equipment here.

Dru: You know, you've crossed me one too many times. I have some very personal business to deal with today.

Phyllis: Like you have the market cornered on "heavy personal business," Drucilla.

Dru: I have a crisis to deal with, Phyllis.

Phyllis: What'd you do, lose your wig?

Dru: I'm so sick of your mouth. I am sick of you!

Phyllis: Oh, my-- I'm sick of you! Let me tell you something, girl. Get off of me!

Neil: Hey!

Phyllis: Get off!

Neil: What the hell is going on here?

Dru: Here, come on, Phyllis. Come on.

Phyllis: Hey, hey.

Dru: Hey. Hi, Neil.

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Jack: Well, look who's sitting around in his robe reading the paper. Dad, you've always been a good influence on me. I'm glad, at long last, I can return the favor.

John: Well, yes, Jackie, I guess I have taken a page from your book, in a w..

Jack: Well, it's good to--

Gloria: John, my sweet, you want French roast-- ooh. Hello, Jack.

John: (Chuckles)

Jack: Hi there.

John: Yes, French roast will be just great. Thank you.

Gloria: I'll be right back. (Hums)

Jack: Well, I must say, Gloria looks ravished this morning. Ooh, I mean ravishing. Sorry.

John: Jack, you say one crude word to that woman and I swear, I will kick your--

Jack: It's just between us, Dad. Give me a little credit. So you decided to, uh, take the next step, huh?

John: Oh, goodness. That is not up for discussion.

Jack: What, your sex life? No, that's just fine with me. I just wanted to say... congratulations.

John: Thank you.

Jack: It's been a tough couple of years. You deserve it. Enjoy yourself.

John: Jackie, you know, I don't need your permission.

Jack: Yeah, that's true.

John: Mm-hmm. (Chuckles)

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Kevin: Sure, I understand.

Lauren: You'll stop asking me out?

Kevin: If that's what you want.

Lauren: No gifts. No surprises.

Kevin: Cross my heart.

Lauren: Thank you.

Kevin: This is a big adjustment for you-- seeing me in a different light-- and you need time. I get that.

Lauren: No.

Kevin: No, Lauren, look, I was a mess when we first met. I don't blame you for wanting to take this slow.

Lauren: This is not what I've been trying to tell you.

Kevin: No, no, no, look, but I'm a different man today. And it's all because of you. I mean, I know I still have a ways to go, but I am finally turning into the type of person that I always wanted to be. You know, the type of man that you would want to be with.

Lauren: All right, Kevin, stop. I do not have romantic feelings for you.

Kevin: Not yet.

Lauren: No, not ever. Oh, my God. This is so frustrating. Look, I've tried to be nice to you, all right? I have tried to let you down easily, but you're not hearing me! So I'm just gonna tell you outright, all right? We will never be more than friends. So stop deluding yourself. We will never, ever have a romantic relationship.

Kevin: Well, tell me how you really feel.

Lauren: I'm sorry. I didn't want to raise my voice like that.

Kevin: No, no. You... you say whatever you want. You speak your mind, you know? And that's one of the things I like most about you.

Lauren: I don't want to be hurtful.

Kevin: Hurt? Me? You want me to back off, I'll back off. You know, if you say you need more space, I will give you all the space in the world. But I will-- I am never gonna give up hope.

Lauren: Please, Kevin.

Kevin: No, no. It was you who taught me to have hope again. You know, when I hit rock bottom, when I thought that I had nothing left to live for, it was you who said to me... that things are gonna get better. You said--you swore, you swore to me, you said things are gonna get better, and I believed you, you know? And you said to me that I had something to offer. And now for the first time in my life, I actually believe that.

Lauren: Because wh-- what happened at the Rec Center?

Kevin: Yeah. Yeah. The day that I saved Lily, everything changed, you know? Now it's like I have all this positive energy around me, and people treat me with respect.

Lauren: I'm glad you feel that things are turning around for you.

Kevin: (Sighs) you know, there isn't too much that I'm certain of in this world, Lauren. But I am so sure that you are the woman for me. And someday you will realize that I am the man for you. And I don't care how long it takes. I can wait.

Lauren: Oh, my God. (Sighs) oh.

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Elliot: It's all right. I want to marry you, but if it makes you nervous, don't worry about it. Although, there are advantages to being married, besides the obvious.

Jill: Really? What might those be?

Elliot: We'd get to share a life together with no ambiguity, no question of commitment. And in case you hadn't noticed, we're pretty fantastic together. It's a big, beautiful world out there. I want to share it with you. Why don't you marry me?

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Ashley: Oh, sweetie, look at you.

Abby: Check out my boots.

Ashley: (Laughs)

Abby: Do you like 'em?

Ashley: I love your boots! They're great.

Nikki: All you need now is a lariat, and you're all set.

Abby: What's a lariat?

Nikki: Oh, it's something you use when you're out on the range roping livestock.

Abby: Like a real cowgirl uses?

Nikki: That's right.

Abby: Thanks again for the cool outfit, Nikki.

Nikki: Honey, you are very welcome. I'm so glad you like it.

Miguel: Would you like me to have some snacks ready for when Abby gets back from her ride?

Nikki: Yes, thank you, Miguel. That'd be wonderful.

Victor: Well, what have we here?

Abby: I'm a cowgirl!

Victor: I can see that. Starfire's a very lucky horse to have a well-dressed owner like you.

Abby: When can we ride Starfire?

Victor: Right now. Horses are all saddled up.

Ashley: (Gasps) well, you be careful, okay? And you mind Victor.

Abby: I will. Hey, I have an idea. Why don't you come with us, Mommy?

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Neil: What the hell is going-- I could hear you three clear down the hallway.

Diane: Not three. Don't look at me, Neil. I'm just an innocent bystander.

Neil: Drucilla, what's this all about?

Dru: Neil, I came in here to have a meeting--

Phyllis: Listen, she came into this office--

Dru: Clutter was all over this chair.

Phyllis: I had all my folders on this chair. She wouldn't get up.

Dru: She pushed me out.

Neil: All right! Stop! Stop! One at a time. It's good manners.

Dru: Exactly. I'd like to explain--

Phyllis: Oh, oh, I'd love to hear this. I'm just gonna sit down right here.

Dru: (Clears throat) I came--

Neil: Diane, since you're not a part of this, I think it's best if you leave.

Diane: With pleasure. I will call you later, Dru.

Dru: Okay, Diane.

Diane: Mm-hmm.

Dru: Sorry.

Neil: Now then, do either one of you want to take a deep breath and tell me exactly what this argument was about?

Dru: Okay--

Neil: Phyllis.

Phyllis: Well, thank you very much, Neil. I'd love to tell you what this argument was about. It is apparent we can't share an office.

Dru: No kidding, Sherlock.

Neil: You know what really upsets me about all this? You both-- both of you promised me that you would try to coexist.

Dru: And I have tried, Neil. I have tried so hard to coexist with that train wreck.

Phyllis: Oh, train wreck? See? Your wife continues to resort to calling me names, all right? She's like an out-of-control child.

Dru: I'm an out-of-control child? Neil, if you had any idea what she tried to do to me--

Phyllis: Oh, come on. Names. Name-calling. What do--

Neil: All right! That's it. I've heard enough. You're both fired.

Dru: (Mouths) she's fired. She's fired. 

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John: Jackie, I'd like you to do me a favor.

Jack: Sure. Just ask.

John: Now you know that your sister Ashley is very protective of me.

Jack: That's putting it nicely.

John: Now please, without antagonizing her, could you just talk to her and tell her that I do not want her to give Gloria a hard time.

Jack: That's going to antagonize her, dad. It's gotta come from you. If it comes from--

Gloria: Okay, we got French roast--ooh-- hot milk and three cups. So, Jack, will you join us?

Jack: Uh, yeah, yeah, I'd--I'd love to have a quick one.

Gloria: Good. (Laughs) okay. You first, John.

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Ashley: Mm, I don't think I'm gonna go riding with you, honey.

Abby: Why not?

Ashley: Well, because it's just a special activity that you and Victor do together.

Abby: I'm sure he won't mind. Will you, Victor?

Victor: No. We do have some extra riding clothes, don't we, Miguel?

Miguel: Absolutely.

Victor: All right.

Abby: So will you come with us, Mommy?

Ashley: You really want me to?

Abby: Uh-huh. It'll be fun. We've never been on horses together before.

Nikki: Miguel, could you please take Abby down to the stables?

Victor: Darling, we're in the middle of a discussion.

Nikki: I know, but I really would like her to go now, if you don't mind.

Miguel: Certainly. Come on, Abby. Let's go see Starfire.

Ashley: Bye, sweetie.

Victor: I'll be right down, sweetheart.

Nikki: What is going on here?

Ashley: Oh, what is your problem now?

Nikki: I thought the idea of these visits was for Victor and Abby to spend unsupervised time together. Now you're talking about the three of you going riding. What did I miss?

Victor: Let me ask you something. Why are you getting so upset? This was obviously Abbyís idea. You just heard it.

Nikki: Why are we letting a 6 year old determine the plan?

Ashley: I think you're overreacting, Nikki.

Nikki: I think you are not sticking to our agreement.

Victor: I don't think this is worthy an argument, all right? I'll go riding with her alone. I'll simply tell her that you won't be up to it.

Ashley: Fine. Whatever.

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Lauren: So I could not have been clearer with him. I told him in no uncertain terms there was absolutely no future for us.

Michael: Did he fall apart?

Lauren: Actually, I think there must be concrete in there, because he didn't acknowledge a word I said.

Michael: I'm not surprised.

Lauren: And, you know, as frustrating as it was, I actually felt sad for him? He's so filled with false hope. I actually wanted to comfort him, but I didn't want to go there, you know? That's like giving him a positive sign.

Michael: I know. I know. It's always that way with Kevin, isnít it? One moment, you want to wring his neck, the next, you're giving him a hug.

Michael: We can't go on this way.

Lauren: What do you want to do?

Michael: I don't think we have any more choices.

Michael: We have to tell Kevin the truth about us.

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Dru: Fired? Are you serious?

Neil: Drucilla, I am dead serious. You are fired, and so are you, Phyllis.

Dru: Whoa!

Neil: I am tired of this constant bickering and name-calling.

Dru: Oh, Neil.

Phyllis: Okay. Hey, hey, hey, things just got a little out of control.

Dru: Yeah, man. We had a mini-meltdown. We're over it.

Phyllis: Right. Of course. I mean, we have no excuse for acting that way, but now it's over.

Dru: No. I am--we're sorry.

Phyllis: Okay, yeah. We're sorry. Exactly. It won't happen again.

Dru: Never happen again.

Neil: You're damn right it's not gonna happen again, because you'll both be gone.

Phyllis: Oh, come on.

Dru: Neil.

Phyllis: Listen, listen, Neil, don't be so serious about it. This isn't a big deal.

Dru: Oh, Neil, please, this is never gonna happen again. We promise. Right, Phyllis?

Phyllis: That's right. That's right, girlfriend.

Neil: Save it.

Dru: Yeah, that's my homey.

Neil: I'm not impressed. I'll give you ten minutes to get your stuff and get the hell outta this building, otherwise, I'm calling security, and they'll escort you out. Now you can get all your personal objects and your effects--

Dru: Neil...

Neil: But please leave all files and materials pertaining to the job here, because they are my property. They belong to Newman Enterprises now. Um...

Dru: Neil.

Neil: I'll see you at home.

Dru: You sounded like an idiot calling me "girlfriend."

Phyllis: Shut up.

Dru: Shut up.

Phyllis: Fired. Fired. Fired.

Dru: It's your fault. Shut up. Where's my stuff? Where's my bag?

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Lauren: You want to tell Kevin about us?

Michael: Want to? No. Is it the right thing to do? I think so. Look, I'm always insisting that Kevin be honest with me. I would be a huge hypocrite if I didn't return the favor.

Lauren: I mean, he's bound to find out anyway, right?

Michael: Yeah. Sooner or later, yeah. Let's make it sooner. You've been shouldering this burden too long already. It isn't fair to you that you're the only one dealing with this problem. I don't feel good about hiding behind you that way.

Lauren: Oh, no. You're not doing that.

Michael: Oh, yes. I've been avoiding the inevitable.

Lauren: No, you've been looking out for him.

Michael: Yeah, I know. Making up for all those years I couldn't protect him from my stepfather--we know.

Lauren: Maybe.

Michael: Maybe. You know when Kevin pulled through-- you know, when he was beaten so badly-- I swore that I would never fail him again. And in spite of how difficult and infuriating he has been, I have done everything in my power to protect him. And believe me, there are times when I was tempted not to.

Lauren: So why did you?

Michael: Oh, guilt is a huge motivator. Well, maybe not totally. I care about Kevin. I care about what happens to him.

Lauren: But you said yourself, if you keep getting him out of these jams, he's not gonna learn. He's not gonna be able to take responsibility for himself.

Michael: No. I'm damned if I do, I'm damned if I donít.

Lauren: Yeah, but I think that it's more about teaching Kevin how to make choices for himself. You know, you can't do it for him, Michael, but you can do it with him.

Michael: Lauren, that would involve Kevin telling the truth, something I don't see happening anytime soon. He is addicted to lying, to covering up. I mean, no matter what's going on, he comes at me with that, "oh, Mikey, it's okay. Everything is cool."

Lauren: Yeah, well, he does that stuff with me, too.

Michael: Yeah, well, when it hits the fan, he's gonna expect us to dig him out.

Lauren: We're his lifelines. We seem to be the only ones that care about him.

Michael: You know, in an odd sort of way, Kevin is responsible for us getting together.

Lauren: Strange how that works.

Michael: (Laughs) I doubt little brother's gonna see it that way.

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Gina: You didn't care for your salads?

Michael: No, no, Gina, everything is fine. We just have a lot on our plates, don't we?

Lauren: No pun intended.

Gina: Mm-hmm. Are you sure? I mean, I could fix you something else.

Michael: Unh-unh. It is delicious, Gina. Thank you so much for checking.

Gina: Okay.

Michael: Okay.

Michael: Listen to me, I really don't know if this is the right thing to do. This could push him off the edge, you know? Um, I don't want to be the one who breaks his heart. He may never trust me again, ever. Or worse, we might not be able to pick any of those pieces up again. And, uh, given what he's been through, I-I don't think I can do that.

Lauren: Well, there is an alternative.

Michael: Anything. Anything.

Lauren: We stop seeing each other.

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Ashley: Are you satisfied?

Nikki: Yes, actually, I am. What did you think, that I would let you come into my home and completely ignore me?

Ashley: That's not what I was doing.

Nikki: You could've fooled me.

Ashley: My daughter asked me to go riding with her and Victor. It was a simple request. It was not a plot to exclude you.

Nikki: Well, I didn't notice you inviting me.

Ashley: You never gave me the chance.

Nikki: Oh, please.

Ashley: You know, what am I doing that's so terrible? Please tell me. I know this is a difficult situation for everyone. I'm just trying to make it work so we can do what's best for Abby.

Nikki: Mm-hmm. And if it happens to bring you closer to Victor--

Ashley: Oh!

Nikki: Well, then that's just an added bonus.

Ashley: How many times must I say it? I'm not interested in him.

Nikki: It doesn't matter how many times you say it. It doesn't make it true.

Ashley: What happened to you? I mean, really, when did you get so paranoid?

Nikki: Let me ask you something. How would you feel if I were chasing after your husband like you're chasing after mine? How would you like it if Brad and I just cut you out of our lives completely? Would you like that? You know, on second thought, you probably wouldn't mind. Because you and I both know that Victor is the man you're in love with.

Ashley: Okay.

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John: (Laughs)

Jack: (Laughs) that's a good one. I will remember that.

Gloria: Oh, well, I did clean it up a little.

Jack: Yeah, I-- I kinda figured.

Gloria: (Laughs)

John: Does Gloria tell the best jokes, or what?

Jack: Yes, she does. Listen, I'm gonna make myself scarce. Gloria, thank you for the coffee. Oh, and, uh, thank you for putting a smile on my dad's face again. It's been a long time. I wasn't sure he remembered.

Gloria: Well, you're welcome, Jack. It's my pleasure.

John: Hey.

Gloria: What?

John: You know what? That is not the only thing I thought I'd forgotten.

Gloria: You didn't forget anything. Oh, John... you are such a wonderful man.

John: Oh.

Gloria: Thank you, thank you, thank you.

John: You're adorable.

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Jill: So you want me to just uproot my whole life and go jet-setting around the world with my husband?

Elliot: Well, we can travel and maintain a presence here. Whatever works for you.

Jill: But you said you wanted to see the whole world.

Elliot: I want you to be my world.

Jill: Do you mean that?

Elliot: I do.

Jill: Because you love me?

Elliot: Because I love you.

Jill: And it would make traveling a lot easier if we had the same name on our passports, yes? I've kind of already turned you down, though.

Elliot: Yeah, you did.

Jill: Mm-hmm.

Elliot: But you're in luck today. We're having a one-time special-- two proposals for the price of one. All you have to do is say yes. I want you for the rest of my life, Jill Abbott. I want you to be my wife. Just say yes, and I'll cherish you... always.

Jill: Yes. Yes, Elliot, I will marry you.

Elliot: You sure?

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Phyllis: Ugh. (Clears throat) elevator is taking so long.

Dru: I know you're not talking to me.

Phyllis: No, I'm not talking to you.

Dru: Good.

Phyllis: Good call. You better take the stairs if you're smart.

Dru: Why's that, Phyllis?

Phyllis: Because the elevator is not big enough for your head.

Dru: Whatever.

Phyllis: Yeah, whatever. Bitch.

Dru: Oh, thank you. Did you call me a bitch, babe?

Phyllis: Oh, yes, I did. I said it loud.

Dru: Babe in total control, honey--that's what that means. Babe in total control, honey.

Phyllis: Good.

Dru: Mm-hmm.

Phyllis: Oh.

Dru: Mm-hmm. You happy now?

Phyllis: Am I happy?

Dru: Yeah. You picked that stupid fight.

Phyllis: You started it.

Dru: Oh, please. Neil is so mad at you.

Phyllis: He's not that upset. He's not gonna really fire us.

Dru: Oh, maybe not me, but you're outta luck.

Phyllis: Why, because you're his wife?

Dru: Uh-huh. That would give me some leverage, yes, it would.

Phyllis: He's not that kind of guy.

Dru: I know my man better than you do, Pippi.

Phyllis: Oh, really? You know "your man" better than I do? Let me tell you something. I know him in business. I been working for him for years. He's not that kind of guy.

Dru: Well, since you're such a veteran, Phyllis, suppose you tell us what we should do.

Phyllis: Oh, asking my advice. Well, I say we get in Neilís good graces, or else we'll be standing in the unemployment line.

Dru: (Laughs) you may be in the unemployment line, but not me, sweetie. I don't even know why I'm talking to you. I don't want to help you, okay?

Phyllis: Every woman for herself, then.

Dru: Suits me just fine, Phyllis. I have the home court advantage.

Phyllis: Well, good for you. You get to face him first. I don't want to be in your shoes.

Dru: Yeah. What was--what was that?

Phyllis: Oh, my gosh.

Dru: Oh. Oh.

Phyllis: We're stopped. (Bangs on keypad)

Dru: Are we stuck in here?

Phyllis: Mm-hmm.

Dru: Oh, man.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ashley: I am so sick of listening to this garbage.

Nikki: Oh, well, I am sick of you trying to get your claws into my husband.

Ashley: What do you want me to do, tell Victor he can't see her anymore? Break off all contact between Victor and Abby? He'll never stand for it. He'll fight me every step of the way. And you know who will suffer? That little girl you care so much about.

Nikki: I do care about her.

Ashley: You say you do. I remember you standing in this room just a few months ago, that very touching speech about how we should put our own personal interests aside, do what's best for Abby. The truth is, you have done nothing to make this transition easier, Nikki. In fact, you've just caused problems and made accusations the whole time.

Nikki: That's because I know that you are trying to take advantage of the situation.

Ashley: I'm trying to find some peace. I've already admitted I've made some mistakes, and now I'm just trying to make an arrangement that'll work for everyone.

Nikki: Well, that sounds very well and good, but I don't believe a word of it.

Ashley: I don't care what you believe. Guess what. Abby's gonna be in Victor's life, and that means I am, too. The sooner you accept that, the easier things will be.

Nikki: What if I don't? What if I decide to make things difficult?

Ashley: Well, I think we both know whose side Victor would be on, don't you?

Nikki: Oh, my God. I feel so sorry for your little girl. That sweet child was only brought into this world to satisfy some sick need of yours to be close to a man that you will never have. That is sad.

Ashley: Don't you dare stand there and judge me!

Nikki: I'm just saying the truth.

Ashley: You know what? You've said enough. Why don't you do us both a favor? Why don't you start acting like the confident woman you keep saying you are? Things would be a lot smoother then, Nikki.

Ashley: What happened?

Nikki: Oh, my God.

Victor: She had an accident.

Ashley: Oh, my God. Is she all right?

Victor: Please get the car ready right now. I'll explain it on the way to the hospital, okay?

Ashley: Wait a minute, is she--is she conscious?

Victor: We've got to get to the hospital. Would you open the door?

Ashley: Abby? Abby, it's gonna be okay. It's all right, sweetie.

Nikki: Uh, Genoa City Memorial Hospital, please.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Michael: I don't want to stop seeing you.

Lauren: Well, I don't want to stop, either. But if you think this is gonna make him go over the edge, then... temporarily.

Michael: What, until Kevinís in better shape to handle this?

Lauren: What do you think?

Michael: I think it could be a long time coming.

Lauren: He was making progress.

Michael: Yeah. I thought so, too. But with this Lily Winters thing and his obsession with you, I don't know anymore.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Next on "The Young and the Restless"...

Nikki: I need to tell you something.

Brad: What's wrong?

Diane: Are you having second thoughts about firing your wife and, uh, Phyllis?

Dru: Somebody!

Phyllis: Help!

Dru: Come on now.

Lauren: Kevin, what are you doing back here? 

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