Passions Transcript Friday 9/22/06 [an error occurred while processing this directive]

Passions Transcript Friday 9/22/06--Canada; Monday 9/25/06--USA
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Provided By Eric
Proofread by Jodi

Julian: Make sure to get a copy of this to every member of Lutec and send a blind copy to the Vice President.

Valerie: To gently remind him who's really setting the price of oil?

Julian: You will go far here, dear.

Eve: Julian, I just heard that you cut the funding for the hospital. I don't know how you could be so cruel.

Julian: Valerie, you can take a break.

Eve: Oh, gosh, Valerie, I'm sorry. I didn't see you there.

Valerie: Oh, how nice to see you, Dr. Russell.

Julian: Well, Eve, what can I do for you? You seem upset.

Eve: Upset, Julian? You cut the funding from the Crane trust. The hospital relies on that money, Julian. Without it, we're going to have to cut important programs. And you know that we are running our budget on a shoestring as it is.

Julian: Well, that's a pity, but I'm sure you can find other donors. You see, I established the Crane trust in your honor when we were together. But now that you've broken off our engagement, I really don't see the point in contributing such a large sum of money to an enterprise that really does not interest me. Surely you understand that.

Eve: What I understand is that the selfish old Julian is back in action, the one who uses money to control people. Well, let me tell you something, Julian; it's not going to work.

Jared: Hey, Tess, no, it's Jared.

Theresa: Ethan.


Ethan: Hey, I'm here. I'm right here, ok?

Theresa: Will you hold me, please?

Ethan: It's ok. It's ok. It's going to be fine. Shh, it's going to be fine.

Theresa: Ok.

Spike's voice: Damn it, if those idiots hadn't rescued her, I would've cooked Theresa alive in that steam room. Hell, when life gives you lemons -- now I'm going to have to come up with another way to rid the world of the annoying Mrs. Crane.

Fox: Oh, you were right, Mother. Miguel's right there just making it with --

Ivy: Kay? Oh, honey.

Fox: It's impossible though.

Ivy: Maybe you should make sure.

Fox: You just watch.

Ivy: Yeah.

Ivy: Let's see Kay talk her way out of this one. This wedding is off.

Fox: What the hell do you think you're doing, huh?

Miguel: What?

Ivy: Really, Kay, how --

Fox: Mother.

Siren: Hi, Foxy.

Ivy: What are you doing here?

Fox: I'm sorry, I thought you were --

Miguel: What did you think, Fox?

Fox: I'm sorry. I thought you were with Kay. I didn't see Siren here.

Kay: Whew, that was close. Way too close.

Tabitha: Greetings from outer space.

Kay: Tabitha, you're back. I missed you.

Tabitha: Oh, yes. Well, that's enough of that rubbish.

Kay: You look great. So the virus is cured?

Tabitha: Completely. I took the cure on Saturn. I'm back to my old self.

Kay: Good. Has Endora seen you yet?

Tabitha: Oh, no, not yet, no. I've only just arrived. I sent Mother Goose home and I peeped in at her and she's sound asleep. I can't wait to see her. I've missed her so much. So, what's the news?

Kay: Things are not good.

Tabitha: Oh, no, don't tell me you're still enmeshed in that love triangle with Fox and Miguel.

Kay: Oh, it's worse. I went to the bridal salon to try on wedding gowns, and Miguel showed up in my dressing room.

Tabitha: What a damn cheek!

Kay: Oh, I don't know what's wrong with me. I was so attracted to him that we ended up making love.

Tabitha: What? In the dressing room? Well, really, Kay, why not in the coal cellar or on the garbage dumper? Well, you obviously haven't retained any of the lessons I taught you about the fine art of seduction.

Kay: Well, Fox almost caught us, so we took off to the beach and we started making love again. And then -- then I heard Fox's voice, so I ran. And he was there with his mother. And I know she just wanted him to see me with Miguel. I was set up.

Tabitha: That sounds like poison Ivy.

Kay: What am I going to do? I'm so confused.

Tabitha: Oh, you mortals get sillier all the time. Honestly, Kay, no one else can tell you what to do. You know that, dear. You're the only one who knows what's in your heart. You just have to ask yourself the question, which man do you love the most, Fox or Miguel?

Ethan: Oh, it's ok. It's all right. It's all right. I'm here. You're going to be fine.

Theresa: Just don't leave me, ok?

Ethan: Hey, I'm not going anywhere, ok? You're going to be all right. Call Dr. Russell, Jared. Tell her what's happened. She needs to check out Theresa right away.

Jared: I can carry her.

Ethan: Make the call.

Valerie: So, is the new job challenging?

Gwen: Well, it has its moments. I tell you, the best part is having Jane right downstairs in Crane daycare. I get to see her a few times a day. She gets to spend time with little Ethan.

Valerie: Hmm.

Gwen: Yeah, I know it doesn't sound like a big deal to you now, but just wait till you become a mother.

Valerie: No, no. I'm happy for you. It's just, well, not to step on sore toes, but I don't like for you and Ethan to be working in the same building as the big boss lady. Their past history isn't exactly a secret.

Gwen: Well, surprisingly, it's actually not that bad. Since Theresa started dating Jared, my entire life has changed for the better. She decided she was going to move past Ethan. She was going to move on with her life. And I think for once, Theresa has actually finally let my husband go.

Valerie: Well, that doesn't sound like Theresa.

Gwen: Well, it didn't to me either, but I'll tell you so far it seems to be working. For the first time in years, Ethan and I are free of Theresa.

Valerie: Are you sure about that?

Kay: I love Fox and Miguel. I mean, is that so hard to understand?

Tabitha: Oh, no, not to me, dear. In my opinion, every woman should have a stable full of stallions. After all, variety is the spice of life. But frankly, I don't think that Miguel or Fox would be agreeable to a permanent ménage a trois. Neither of them seem very good at sharing.

Kay: Tabitha, what do I do? I love Fox. I mean, he's been so good to me. He adores me and he's been so good to Maria. We're getting married.

Tabitha: Yes, but I mean, while you were choosing your bridal gown for your wedding to Fox, you were having it off in the dressing room with Miguel.

Kay: I know. Fox has been so faithful to me. He has been so committed to me. He didn't go gallivanting off all over the world looking for Charity. But I've loved Miguel my whole life. And now he's finally realized he loves me. How can I just give him up? Where's your magic bowl? Wow, you are better.

Tabitha: Yep, I'm firing on all cylinders. What do you want to see?

Kay: Show me the beach. I want to see what happened after I ran out of there.

Siren: So, are you two through? We don't need an audience.

Fox: I'm sorry, Siren. I didn't mean to interrupt you.

Miguel: Don't worry about it. We're just leaving.

Siren: Oh, were we?

Kay: Oh, did you see that?

Tabitha: Apparently, our mermaid is doing all right even without the magic power of her siren song.

Kay: Miguel was just with me. He just begged me to break off my engagement to Fox because he said he loved me. Two seconds later he's making out with her. Oh, God, how could I be so stupid?

Tabitha: Aren't you used to all that by now, Kay?

Kay: Why did I trust him? And to think that I almost broke off my engagement to be with him. You know what? I am done. That is it. It's over. I love Fox. I've made my choice. I'm going to marry him. He is a fabulous man. I'm going to spend the rest of my life with him. And there is not a damn thing Miguel can do to change my mind.

Eve: Julian, the Crane family has always supported the hospital. I don't even know if we can continue to survive without your continued donations. Now, Julian, you just can't be this petty.

Julian: Oh, plug petty. When you agreed to be my wife, I set up the Crane trust, which more than doubled my family's contributions. I'm not the one who decided to break our engagement. Surely you were aware that by rejecting me, you'd also be rejecting my money.

Eve: No, because I thought that you were above revenge.

Julian: This is not about revenge. It's a business decision. I mean, a large sum of money tied up in the trust can be used on equally deserving charities. But if you are -- are short, perhaps you could get Sheridan or Theresa to spare you a million or two.

Eve: I know what this is that you are doing, Julian. This is emotional blackmail. This is your way of trying to get me to come back to you.

Julian: Well, you felt the need to end something and so did I.

Eve: Julian, you pushed me into breaking our engagement.

Julian: I did nothing but try to patch up what had become a one-way love affair. Romantic rooftop dinner for you and all you do is talk on your cell phone to T.C.'s nurse. I planned to contribute hundreds of thousands of dollars to renovate your office wing. While we took a cruise through the Mediterranean, what do you do? You throw your engagement ring at me.

Eve: I did not throw it.

Julian: I don't know what I have done. All I did was try to work things out between us. But as you've made very clear, you don't wish to try. So, I'm just following your lead on cutting the ties that bind us.

Eve: Julian, this is just -- this is so infantile. If you regress any further, you're going to need a wet nurse. Are you so self-centered that you can't see why I might want to help the father of my children when he has a debilitating stroke? Is it really that hard to understand that I have dozens of sick patients who need me, who count on me? I can't just drop my career in the blink of an eye to go on a pleasure cruise with you. Cut the funding. Julian, you're like a little kid who doesn't like the rules of the game, so he's going to take his toys and run away home. Hundreds of people can suffer from this decision, Julian, if not thousands. I mean, it's absurd. Every five-year-old knows, Julian, that you can't call all the shots all the time.

Julian: Neither can you.

[Cell phone rings]

Julian: Ah, another important conversation interrupted by a cell phone. Go ahead, my dear, take it.

Eve: Dr. Russell. Jared? Oh, good Lord. No, no, I'm in the building. Yes, Theresa's office. Ok, I'll be right there. Theresa's had an accident, so I have to go.

Julian: Theresa's whole life is an accident. Don't go. I want us to talk. It's not too late for us to work this out.

Eve: She needs me, Julian. It's an emergency.

Julian: There's always an emergency with Theresa. She lives for drama.

Eve: I'm sorry, I have to go.

Chris: What's happened?

Valerie: Oh, something happened with Theresa, as usual.

Chris: What?

Valerie: You got me.

Spike: We've got to stop meeting like this, people are going to start talking.

Chris: You idiot. You ignored my advice and you did something to Theresa, didn't you?

Gwen: Why is my half-naked husband carrying your half-naked girlfriend through the halls?

Jared: It's a long story. But I can tell you this. When it comes to Theresa and Ethan, neither one of us can afford to let our guard down.

Valerie: I should send my resume to Donald trump. I'd bet he'd be a pussycat after this place.

Kay: Look who's back.

Tabitha: Oh, Endora, my sweet pea. Oh, hello, darling. Oh, I hope you're not too cross with me for being away so long, huh?

Tabitha: Oh, Endora, you clever girl. All my favorite things. Oh, and black lagoon punch. Oh, oh, oh, you shouldn't have. Oh, and I missed you, too, my little witchling. I don't ever want to be separated from you again. Not ever. Kay, bring us a knife so we can cut this wonderful cake. Devil's food, the real thing.

Kay: I have to say, for a wicked old witch, you are one hell of a mother.

Tabitha: I know, isn't it amazing? Really, when I was your age, back in the dark ages, they made us choose between the traditional role of bearing demons and a career in evil. Of course, I went for the career girl route, but now look at me. Thousands of years later and I seem to be able to have it all. Oh, how I love my darling Endora.

[Growling in basement]

Tabitha: Yes, yes, yes. I love, love, love, love, love her more than anything else on this planet or any other planet, and I don't care who knows it. Well done, Endora. So, are you feeling any better, Kay?

Kay: Oh, a little. Oh, God, I just -- I am so glad that Fox did not see me with Miguel. You know what? From now on, nothing is going to come between us. We're going to get married. And I'm going to spend the rest of my life with Fox.

Fox: Hey, there you are.

Miguel: Tabitha, you're back.

Fox: Welcome back, Tabitha.

Tabitha: Thank you, boys. Nice to see you, Siren.

Siren: Feeling's mutual.

Tabitha: And, Ivy, gracing my humble home with your presence once again.

Ivy: Isn't it a little early for Halloween, Tabitha?

Tabitha: Yes, it is. But Endora and Kay know that it's my favorite holiday, so they've pulled out all the stops for my welcome home party. So, who's for punch and cake, huh?

Fox: Oh, it sounds lovely.

Miguel: Yeah.

Fox: So, what happened to you?

Kay: What do you mean?

Fox: What do I mean? Well, I went to the bridal salon, but when I went into your dressing room, you were gone. There was no sign of you.

Ivy: And when we went outside, we found your clothes in the alley. So, why did you run off like that, Kay, and where did you go? I'm sure there must be some logical explanation as to why you're running around town like some cheap stripper. We'd love to hear it.

Chris: What did you do to Theresa?

Spike: Relax, Theresa's fine.

Chris: Fine? She looked half dead a minute ago. What did you do? Did you try and kill her?

Spike: You know, it's none of your damn business, ok? I'm in charge of this operation here, buddy boy. And you know what? You're not holding up your end of the deal. I want my money, Chris.

Chris: Your money? You mean the Cranes' money? Now listen up, Spike. Embezzlement ain't some little hit-and-run crime. It takes a little time, a little finesse.

Spike: Well, if it's such a big problem, then why don't we just take Theresa out of the picture?

Chris: Because you won't be able to enjoy a dime of that money if you're executed for murder.

Spike: Oh, come on, man.

Chris: Smart guy.

Spike: Who's going to catch me, huh? I made sure what happened in the steam room looked like an accident. I ain't stupid, ok?

Chris: You could've fooled me. Now, I'm doing everything I can to get you your money, but not at this price. You will leave Theresa alone.

Ethan: Eve, she was in the steam room. It was on full blast. I mean, there's got to be something wrong with the equipment down there.

Eve: I think you got her out just in time. Any longer, she could've suffered permanent damage.

Ethan: She's going to be ok. She has to be ok.

Eve: Well, she needs to rest. She's going to be weak for a while, but yes, Theresa's going to be just fine.

Ethan: Good. Thank God for that, huh?

Gwen: Gee, I guess today must be your lucky day.

Jared: Thanks for all your help, Ethan.

Jared: Hey, Tess, how are you feeling?

Theresa: What?

Eve: Theresa, drink this, honey. She needs to re-hydrate herself, so the more liquids, the better.

Jared: Yeah, definitely.

Eve: She's going to feel dizzy and disoriented, so she needs to rest. No more work today, Theresa. Do you hear me?

Theresa: Yes. Yes, Dr. Russell.

Eve: Ok, and if she gets any worse, call me, I'll revaluate her condition.

Jared: Thanks, doctor. You really had me worried. I'm glad you're ok. You should rest now.

Eve: So just call me if you need me. And I trust you're going to find out what happened with that steam room so it doesn't happen again because she could've died.

Ethan: Yeah, I'm going to put a call in to maintenance actually.

Jared: Oh no, no, I'll do it. You don't work for Crane, remember?

Eve: Just as long as it doesn't happen again. I'll check on Theresa later.

Eve: Gwen, honey, you all right?

Gwen: Yeah, why wouldn't I be? Ethan was distraught over Theresa, he hardly notices I'm here. I guess I should be used to this by now.

Eve: No, honey, I'm sorry. No woman ever gets used to that.

Gwen: You know sometimes I think I should just cut my losses and run.

Eve: Oh, you don't mean it.

Gwen: Well, I do, sometimes. You have no idea how lucky you are, Eve. You're in a loving, wonderful relationship with Julian. He doesn't care about his former women, especially my mother.

Eve: Yeah.

Gwen: Wait, is something wrong?

Eve: Well, I might as well tell you. It's going to be common knowledge soon enough. Julian and I aren't together anymore. I broke off our engagement.

Gwen: What? Why? Julian adores you. Eve, I thought what you two had was really very strong.

Eve: Yeah, so did I. But then T.C. had a stroke and I spent a lot of time nursing him. Julian resented every single minute. And then he started to get this crazy idea in his head that I was falling back in love with my ex-husband.

Gwen: Are you?

Eve: Well, you know, I asked myself that very same question and the answer was no. And I'm sure. Anyway, it's Julian's reactions that were most alarming. I mean, he started to -- to revert into that horrible person that we all used to fear. Almost overnight, he became controlling and selfish and nasty. God, it was just like old times.

Gwen: I can't believe that. He's been such a better man since he's been with you.

Eve: I thought so, but maybe it was just all a facade.

Gwen: Well, I mean, I know I'm in absolutely no position to be giving any advice on love. Lord knows my marriage has its issues. But I don't think you should walk away from someone you love. I mean, why do you think I'm still with Ethan? And unless you give it a fighting chance, I think you're going to regret walking away from Julian too soon. I think you should talk to him and try to work it out.

Eve: Do you know what, Gwen? I think you're right. I think you're right. I think I should talk to Julian and I should talk to him right now.

Jared: You're sure? All right. Thanks. Well, that's disturbing.

Ethan: What is?

Jared: That was the maintenance supervisor. He said that the steam room thermostat and that the shutoff valves were replaced no more than a month ago and were working fine.

Ethan: Well, obviously not.

Jared: Yeah. He also said he can't imagine how this could possibly happen to Theresa unless somebody turned up the steam in the room on purpose.

Spike: All right now, let's get something straight here, Chris, or whatever the hell your name is this year -- I am in charge, ok? And you're going to do what I tell you to do, when I tell you to do it. Or I'll just go have a nice little chat with Sheridan about your connection with Alistair. And it's that simple.

Chris: Go to hell.

Spike: Ok, maybe I'll do that. But on the way over there, I'm going to tell everything I know. And it ain't a pretty picture. You remember, hmm? Now, listen. You just keep your nose out of my business. Your only job is to funnel funds from Crane into my offshore accounts.

Chris: You can't go around killing people.

Spike: Why not? It's always worked before. Now, listen to me. Theresa is an obstacle on our road to success. So, I'd get to cracking, if I was you. Otherwise, I may just eliminate the obstacle and speed up the process.

Chris: I'll have no part of murder.

Spike: Oh, man. Look, you must remember, I read your file and you've done a lot worse than that. Money, Chris, money. And lots of it. Now, if you make me a rich man real quick, well, hell, everything's going to be just hunky-dory. But if not, hey, man, I'm going to have to take matters into my own hands. But I'll get my money. One way or another, I'll get it.

Fox: Honey, I'm waiting. Why did you leave the bridal salon without even saying good-bye?

Ivy: Without your clothes on.

Kay: I -- I -- was -- I was in the dressing room trying on the lovely, lovely gown that your mom bought for me. And I heard your voice, so I panicked because I didn't want you to see me in my wedding dress. I mean, it's bad luck, so I just ran out of there without thinking.

Ivy: That still doesn't explain how your clothes ended up in the alley.

Kay: Uh, yeah, maybe -- maybe I kicked them by accident when I ran out the door.

Fox: Oh, baby, I'll buy that.

Ivy: You will?

Kay: I'm sorry. Maybe I'm crazy, but I just want everything to be perfect for our wedding. I just don't want anything to go wrong.

Fox: Hey, it won't. I mean, how could it? I am so relieved. I mean, forgive me. I just have this suspicious nature. I didn't know what to think. And for a second there I even thought that maybe you took off with Miguel. Wild, isn't it?

Kay: Hilarious.

[Phone rings]

Fox: Oh, excuse me. I got to take this. Fox Crane.

Ivy: Kay, just how do you --

Tabitha: Ivy, why don't you help me here, and get some plates for the cake?

Siren: That's a really silly story, Kay.

Kay: You two sure didn't waste any time.

Miguel: Look, Kay, wait, look, it's not what you think.

Siren: You were with Kay, weren't you? You were using me.

Miguel: No, siren.

Siren: Yes, you did. You were just pretending to be with me so Fox and his mother wouldn't know about Kay.

Miguel: I didn't let it get out of hand. I didn't make love to you.

Siren: Oh, thanks. You know, we would have if Fox and Ivy hadn't shown up.

Miguel: You're right and I apologize.

Siren: Well, you should apologize for going that far and then stopping.

Miguel: I'm sorry, but that's not going to happen, and I already told you, I love Kay.

Siren: Well, you're out of luck, Miguel. From what I can see, Kay is in love with Fox.

Fox: Thank you, Mother.

Ivy: Mm-hmm. You know, you neglected to mention something in that little fable you just told. The wedding dress was a complete mess when we found it on the floor.

Kay: That dress was a mess before it wound up on the floor. It's the ugliest thing I've ever seen.

Ivy: It really looked as if someone had been, I don't know, lying in it. Two someones, in fact.

Kay: I'm on to you, Ivy. I know you set me up today. You somehow managed to get both Fox and Miguel at that damn bridal salon.

Ivy: What bizarre ideas you have, Kay.

Kay: You are not going to stop me from marrying Fox. I love him.

Ivy: Funny. I didn't hear you calling his name when you were in the dressing room with Miguel.

Kay: What?

Ivy: That's right. Another man right before your wedding, it was disgraceful.

Kay: Word on the street is you did the same thing. I love him. And soon you're going to be my mother-in-law so get used to it.

Ivy: Mm-hmm. I'll see you dead before you marry my son.

Kay: Oh, bring it on, blondie.

Fox: Are you two arguing?

Ivy: No, no, no, silly. Really, you know, things just get a little heated before a wedding because there's so much to do and so many things can go wrong. And some weddings never get off the ground.

Fox: Well, no fear. That's not going to happen with this one. My baby belongs to me. Nobody is going to take her away from me.

Ivy: Right. Well, that's why I agreed to help Kay any way I can.

Fox: Really, Mother? I appreciate that. We've got so much to do and so little time to do it.

Ivy: Yes, we do.

Siren: You know, most girls would hate you for what you did to me out there on that beach, but not me. Fox loves Kay. They're going to get married. So seems to me we might as well have a little fun.

Miguel: No, Siren, I'm sorry. I can't. I still have hope Kay will come back to her senses.

Fox: You really have to forgive me. I mean, I love you so much, I let my imagination just run away with me. You know, I've always had a suspicious nature. It's part of growing up Crane.

Kay: You're forgiven.

Fox: I never knew how jealous I could be until lately. I feel horrible. I mean, yeah, right. Miguel's making love to you while you were trying on wedding dresses for me. It's silly, isn't it? I love you. And I know you could never betray me.

Jared: Hey, how do you feel? You want a drink?

Theresa: I just want to go home.

Ethan: I'll get dressed. I'll take you.

Theresa: No, wait. I want Jared to take me home. Will you?

Jared: You bet I will.

Theresa: Thank you. I knew I could count on you.

Eve: Oh, Gwen is right. Julian loves me. And I love him. Of course, he's going to have to learn how to -- how to not lash out when he's angry. But I think if we talk things through, we can salvage this relationship. Our love is much too important to just walk away from.

Fox: You must think I'm a prize fool.

Kay: I would never think that.

Fox: Baby, what we have together is so special and I know that you would never do anything to jeopardize our life together. You really forgive me?

Kay: There's no need for you to apologize.

Ivy: You got that right.

Kay: Look, I know that it looked a little crazy the way that I just ran out of there like that. No wonder you were confused. I just -- I just didn't want you to see me in my wedding dress. Especially that dress. I love you, Fox. And I would marry you right now if I could. Nothing and no one will stop our wedding, do you hear me?

Fox: Yes, ma'am.

Tabitha: Kay gets good luck, she's going to need it.

Chris: You're going to blow this whole thing.

Spike: Me?

Chris: Yeah.

Spike: No way. No way because this is my moment. Why should I waste my time running drugs and whores when I could just skin a little cream right off the top of Crane Industries? Oh, man, it'll be one of the greatest criminal scams in all time. So you better get busy, ok? Because there's a billion or two out there with my name on it. And you better make it quick. Otherwise, I'm afraid Theresa's going to end up with a nasty ending.

Chris: No, man, I mean this. Embezzlement is bad enough without adding murder to the list. And you're lucky your little stupid attempt to kill Theresa in the steam room failed. Do me a favor. Don't do anything like that again.

Spike: I make no promises.

Chris: Listen, I'll do what I can to speed things up from my side.

Spike: Oh, Chris --

Chris: But it's going to take time.

Spike: Chris, you just --

Chris: Listen, man, wise up. If we're not careful, we can both go to prison. Now, you'll get your money. Just get some patience.

Spike: Patience? You don't know me too good there, buddy boy. Because I am not a patient man. I want money. And the only thing standing in my way is that lovely little Theresa. Oh, gosh, I'm sorry there, honey. I'm going to have to remove you from the equation. But I might as well have some fun while I'm doing it.

Theresa: Can you take me home now, please?

Jared: Of course. I'll take you home and take care of you. I don't want you to worry.

Theresa: Thank you.

Gwen: You know, Jared's a good guy. Theresa is really lucky to have him.

Ethan: If you say so. I have to get dressed.

Gwen: I'm not blind, you know.

Ethan: Honey, nothing happened.

Gwen: Oh, a whole lot happened. Yeah, Jared told me that when Theresa was half-conscious and needed help, she reached out for you. And now she's awake, she's thinking clearly and she's pushing you away. She's trying to move on. But you don't want her to push you away. It's you, Ethan. It is you who cannot let her go.

On the Next Passions:

Fancy: If you love Chris and James, start acting that way.

Paloma: It's not Sheridan who will make you happy. It's Fancy.

Valerie: You were nothing but a drug-addicted whore.

Eve: Bitch!

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