Passions Transcript Friday 6/30/06 [an error occurred while processing this directive]

Passions Transcript Friday 6/30/06--Canada; Monday 7/3/06--USA
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Provided By Glynis
Proofread by Jodi

Kay: I love hearing you say you love me. I love you, too.

Miguel's voice: That electric shock Kay got from the faulty wiring made her lose her short-term memory and now she thinks she is engaged to me instead of Fox. But Dr. Russell said it's better to play along until she comes out of this on her own, and I told Fox I wouldn't make love to her. But God help me, I want to.

Kay: Say it again, please.

Miguel: I love you, Kay, more than any other woman in the world.

[Kay sighs]

Tabitha: Oh, this is disaster, that mermaid singing the siren song to Fox. Mermaids have used that song for centuries to lure unsuspecting sailors to their deaths on the rocks. If Siren manages to persuade him to make whoopee, then Fox will suffer the mermaid's curse for the rest of his life. He will never be able to make love to a mortal woman again.

Siren: Ah ah ah ah ah ah ah ah

Fox: Kay?

Siren: His love for that two-faced human is too strong. I'll have to keep the music going.

[Siren song continues]

Siren: Nothing like stereo.

Siren: You will make love to me, Fox. You will be mine forever.

[Siren song continues]

Chad: I love you. God, I love you so much.

Whitney: I love you, too, Chad. God, it feels so good to say that without guilt, without shame, you know?

Chad: And all this time, we thought we were brother and sister.

Whitney: And we're not. I mean, that document J.T. gave you proved we are not related at all.

Chad: You know, I used to pray that somehow, some way, we could be together. I knew it was going to take a miracle.

Whitney: We got our miracle, didn't we?

Chad: We are free. We are free to love one another.

Whitney: Free, I like that. Why don't you feel free enough to come on over here?

Chad: Ok.

[Women talking and laughing]

Edna: Boy, Normie, what a night. And despite your best effort, Alistair and that ding-dong daughter -- Bethy -- of mine -- she just disappeared. They escaped and they are evil personified.

Norma: I should have just shoved her into an oven when I had a chance, baked her into a pizza pie.

Edna: Oh, and who would ever want a Bethy pizza, huh? Too bitter, too tough. No, Normie, Normie, you know what we can do? We can take all the money that Alistair gave us and we can just move on. Or else, I am afraid we could wind up in a looney bin, Italian looney bin.

Norma: Oo. Oh, oh, my money, it's gone!

Edna: What? Oh, no, mine's gone, too! Oh, no, Alistair's goons. When we were beating them up, they were picking your pockets and my chest, see?

Norma: Oh, those fiends!

Edna: Normie, I cannot -- I cannot go back to the pizza parlor! I can't do that.

Norma: We don't have to. Come on, Edna. T iw ceyed oh, ok.

Fancy: Don't worry, Luis. We aheba w?Itlikevery timi close, they somehow manage to get away. It's like I'm doomed for failure. Fa it toup

Luis: Yeah.

Ethan: Luis has got to be hurting. I mean, he was so close to capturing Beth, and god knowswhma fillh et n: Yeah, he will. I know I would if I had a son.

Thesu g,J. L.Juant e father. Ethan is little Ethan's father. Now, lettol. Es tl ets father?

J.T.: Yes, and I can prove it.

Edna: Normie, what are we doing in an Italian lesbian bar? I don't see how you think we are to be making money here.

Norma: It's simple. We are going to use our God-given talents.

Edna: Our talents?

Norma: We are going to put on a show.

Edna: You are going to sing?

Norma: Of course. This face has been hidden from my public for far too long. They're clamoring for a comeback. I'll sing. You'll play the piano. We will conquer Rome, like Hannibal and his elephants.

Edna: I'd rather hear the elephant sing.

Norma: Signora, you the owner of this fine establishment?

Woman: Si.

Norma: It's your lucky day. You are about to have real, live American entertainment just in time for the fourth of July.

Edna: Oh, boy, I hope they don't throw us out of NATO for this.

Alistair: I don't know why I am listening to you. We should be headed for the airport.

Beth: I can't leave Marty. He is your grandson.

Alistair: All right, fine, fine, let's hurry up, because the longer we stay in Rome, the easier it is for Luis to run us down.

Theresa: Get up.

J.T.: Throw away that brick.

Theresa: You say that Ethan is little Ethan's father. Why should I believe you? Because you would say anything to avoid going to jail.

J.T.: Ok, but this is true, I swear it. And like I said, I can prove it.

Theresa: Then I want proof, J.T. Otherwise, I'll have you extradited back to the feds in two shakes.

J.T.: Will you just believe me? It's true. Ethan is little Ethan's father, I swear.

Kay: Every time you say, "I love you," I feel like I've been kissed. I must be the luckiest woman in the world, because every time you hold me in your arms, I just feel so safe from harm. I know that sounds so old-fashioned, but I don't care. It's like you will always protect me and always love me.

Miguel: I do love you. I really do.

Kay: I could listen to you say that all night.

Miguel: I might, if you don't stop me. I love you. I love everything about you. I love the way you smell --

Kay: Oh, then make love to me. Show me how much you love me.

[Siren moaning]

Siren: Mm, humans always did that well, so warm. It's never the same with a walrus. Fox.

Fox: Yes, my darling?

Siren: Make love to me now, and be mine forever.

Fox: Forever and ever.

Siren: Hear that song?

[Siren song playing]

Fox: Kay, where is Kay?

Siren: No, he can't think about Kay.

[Siren song playing]

Fox: Kay, where is she?

Y:Pyt f mi I mean, an walk th h head held high. He doesn't have to worry about any stupid stigma of incest anymore. And what about that nun? I mean, she knew, Chad. How strange is that to have a psychic gift like that?

Chad: Yeah, and J.T.'s document proving that I'm Alistair and Liz's son, not Eve and Julian's.

Whitney: And my aunt Liz being adopted after my mother's mother remarried, so there is no blood relation at all whatsoever.

Chad: You know, it would have saved everyone, including us, a whole lot of grief if your mother and Liz had just known.

Whitney: Yeah, I guess they were never told that Liz was adopted. I wonder why.

Chad: Yeah, well, that doesn't matter. What matters is you and I could be together for the rest of our lives.

Whitney: Hmm, that's right, but you know what? That nun also said that Theresa and Ethan were going to get back together. I wonder if that is going to come true, too.

Chad: Are we really going to talk about Theresa right now?

Whitney: No, I'm sorry. I think we have better things to do, don't we?

Chad: Yeah.

Ethan: What is that? That is a cell phone.

Gwen: Honey, just leave it.

Ethan: No, no, wait, there's initials on here. TLFC? Theresa Lopez-Fitzgerald Crane? This is Theresa's.

Gwen: Honey, so she dropped her cell phone. So what?

Ethan: Gwen, it could be -- it could be more than that. Look at this thing. It's destroyed. Who would do that and why?

{Theresa: I will never let you destroy the only proof I have!

Gwen: Well, I won't let you ruin my marriage!

Theresa: No!

[Gwen grunting] }

J.T.: I can show you proof that Ethan is your son's father.

Theresa: Why should I believe you, J.T.? You have lied to me every moment since we met. Of course Julian is my son's father. I went down to Bermuda to convince him into taking Ethan back into the Crane family. And then I got drunk with him, all right? And I woke up in his bed and the next thing I knew I was pregnant.

J.T.: You are not thinking.

Theresa: Show me the proof, J.T.! Or are you wasting my time?

J.T.: Think back. Who else did you sleep with around that time, like the night before your wedding?

Theresa: Ethan.

J.T.: Bingo, now you got it. You slept with Ethan and then nature did what nature does. Along comes little Ethan.

Theresa: Can this really be true?

Club owner: I hope you know what you are doing.

Norma: I'm a pro, babe, a pro. They'll love me.

Norma: Ladies and ladies,

[Kissing sound] There's a big hello kiss from the U.S. Of A.

[Jeers from audience] Hey, no more of that. It's the greatest land in the world, the land of the free.

[Jeers continue]

Edna: Hey, hey, hey, hey, ladies, come on! Give us a chance, will you? You certainly don't want Norma here, big Norma, going nuclear on you, do you? Capisce?

Norma: Ha ha, that's right! I'm Norma, this here is Edna, and tonight, we are going to sing a few songs, have a few laughs.

Edna: Have a gay old time! Ba-dum-bum. So, sit back, relax, enjoy the show. Hey, hey, you two in the back, none of that. Save it for the truck. Ba-dum-bum. Hey, Normie, honey, are you ready?

Norma: You go, girl.

Edna: You got it.

Edna: Hail Mary.

Norma: Sisters, sisters around the world, so many colors, so many countries. To hell with prejudice, it's time to let freedom ring.

[Cheers from audience] Thank you, thank you, we'll be here all night. And so, to get this festival of freedom started, I got a little song I think you're going to like. Hit it, Edna.

Norma: Lesbian, lesbian sing it loudly and proudly lesbian, lesbian sing it loudly and proudly

Miguel: Do you mind if we just talk?

Kay: About us?

Miguel: Sort of. You know how Theresa is always going on about fate and how things happen for a reason?

Kay: Yeah, what about it?

Miguel: Well, the accident with the washing machine, I mean, do you think there was any way that it happened for a reason, for me and you to end up in bed like this, talking about love?

Kay: What? Well, I don't need to almost die to know that you love me. I mean, you tell me every day, right?

Miguel: Right.

Miguel's voice: Dr. Russell said it isn't good to upset Kay, that she needs to come out of this amnesia on her own.

Miguel: You know, maybe I'm just not making any sense. I'm really tired.

Kay: Ok, ok, but you are right about one thing. I do love you and I know that you love me. M g k iafoo eemi

Miguel's voice: Maybe the accident happened to make me realize how I feel about you, Kay, that I love you and only you.

Tabitha: Oh, I need to see what's happening.

Siren: Kiss me, Fox.

Fox: No, no, not you. Where is Kay? I want Kay.

Tabitha: Well, what do you know? Fox's love for Kay is so strong, he has resisted the siren song. But he won't be able to hold out for long. Oh, if only I could get Kay out of that silly alternate reality she created when she got shocked from my washing machine.

Kay: Did I hear my name?

Tabitha: Kay.

Tabitha: Who do you love, Kay? Who do you really love?

Luis: You're kidding me. All right, grazie, I am on my way. Interpol's pinging technology paid off. They have tracked Beth and Marty to an apartment nearby here.

Fancy: Well, then let's go.

Luis: We can stop them before they get out of Rome, come on.

Ethan: What if something happened to Theresa?

Gwen: Honey, I'm sure she is fine.

Ethan: Honey, look at this thing. It's like someone stomped on it and destroyed it. I mean, what if she's kidnapped or something?

Gwen: It is just a broken cell phone. I'm sure she dropped it and someone ran over it. Besides, she is like a cockroach, very hard to kill.

Ethan: Honey, that's not fair.

Gwen: Fair? Don't talk to me about fair. Ethan, as we speak, Theresa is plotting and scheming to break us up again. You know, I really can't take this anymore. You know, sometimes I feel like I should just give up and just leave you to be with her.

Ethan: Honey, honey, hey, hey, stop. Don't. You are right. I should focus on you. You are my responsibility. You are my wife.

Gwen: And your love?

Ethan: Yes, and my love.

Gwen: Ok.

Gwen's voice: I won, Theresa. Nothing can bring Ethan back to you, nothing.

Theresa: Yes, I slept with Ethan, but he can't be my son's father. I was on the pill.

J.T.: The pill doesn't work that fast, Theresa. I investigated your pharmacy records. You were only on the pill for one night when you slept with Ethan. A woman has to be on the pill for a whole cycle to make sure it's working.

Theresa: How did you get that kind of information?

J.T.: I used to be an investigative reporter, long before I was an editor. Well, you know what we covered at "Daily Private Lives." It's sleaze and scandal and gossip. I was a crack snoop from way back.

Theresa: Is this for real?

J.T.: Yes, I know it for a fact.

Theresa: Ok, well, then, why would Alistair make my son his heir, because if little Ethan is Ethan's son, then he would have no Crane blood in him at all.

J.T.: Because for the first time, Alistair has no idea about the facts. And I wouldn't know except I dug so deep into your history and Ethan's history --

Theresa: No, I need proof. I need proof. You have to show me proof. Do you have proof?

J.T.: I got proof. I got my PDA. I got all my documents on this little baby. If you don't believe me, have a look for yourself. Well, am I right or am I right? Now do you believe that Ethan is little Ethan's father?

Tabitha: Kay, who do you love?

Kay: Miguel, I love Miguel. Did you see that flash of light? It looked like it came from your hand.

Tabitha: Oh, yeah, static electricity, it's been so dry.

Kay: Do you hear that music?

Tabitha: Well, it -- it must be your father from next door. You know how he loves the Bee Gees.

Kay: Yeah, I -- I guess. Why are you standing outside Siren's door?

Tabitha: It's not just Siren inside there. Fox is inside there, too. And from what I understand, they are just about to make wild monkey love.

Kay: Then don't stand outside the door. That's tacky.

Tabitha: But doesn't that make you upset?

Kay: No, why would it? They are a couple.

Tabitha: Oh, Kay, dear, it's been a very strange night. Doesn't anything strike you as odd?

Kay: Well, yes, actually, I've been really confused about some things since I was shocked.

Tabitha: Such as?

Kay: Well, I don't understand why Miguel and I are living here with you.

Tabitha: Well, that makes two of us, dear.

Kay: And why is Fox Crane living here? Why isn't he living at the mansion? And Siren, isn't she strange? She thinks she's a mermaid.

Tabitha: And, and?

Kay: And I have a beautiful daughter and a gorgeous man who loves me. That's all I care about. You know, I am going to go check on Maria. Good night.

Tabitha: Kay heard the siren song. That's odd. Her magical powers must be stronger than I thought. Oh, how on earth am I going tokid y's help? I better wake Endora.

: B ouju ou say, "hi, Grandfather"?

Alistair: Hello, young man. Now, let's go.

Beth: Wait, no, I've got to get Marty's toys and books first.

Alistair: No, we can buy him books, toys, clothes, anything.

Beth: Well, he doesn't want new ones. He likes what he has. I mean, it's bad enough he has to go place to place all over, not seeing his daddy I'm sorry, sweetheart. Listen, you stay here with your grandfather. I'm going to get your toys and all your things and I'll be right back, ok?

Alistair: Hi. Beth, come on, come on, do you want to get caught? Come on! Ha ha.

Ethan: Uh, Chad?

Chad: Ethan, my man, what's going on?

Gwen: Chad, were you just kissing Whitney?

Chad: Uh, we were doing a little more than that.

Gwen: But you guys are --

Chad: Brother and sister? No, no, we are not. We never were.

Ethan: Wait, Chad, I know you've always had a hard time accepting the fact that you are Julian and Eve's son, but come on --

Chad: Correction, Ethan. Alistair Crane and Liz Sanbourne's son.

Gwen: Wait, what?

Chad: Yeah, well, you know that tabloid guy Theresa was chasing?

Ethan: Yeah, yeah, yeah, J.T. Cornell, why?

Chad: Right, well, he gave me proof Alistair had that I was really his son with Liz. It also said Liz was adopted when Dr. Eve's mother remarried. They are not blood-related and neither are Whitney and me.

Ethan: Well, all right, why didn't Dr. Russell tell you that Liz was adopted?

Chad: I guess they didn't know. It's whatever, man. Whitney and I can be together now.

Ethan: Yeah, oh, my God. This is -- I mean, this is fantastic, man. I'm happy for you.

Gwen: Chad, I am so happy for you both.

Ethan: Yeah, you know that old nun at the church? She told Whitney that we were going to get back together.

Ethan: And you did.

Chad: Yeah.

Ethan: Wow, she must be psychic.

Gwen: That old nun.

{Theresa: I spoke to a nun tonight and she said that I would receive information that would bond Ethan to me forever. }

Ethan: Wow, hey, you all right? It looks like you've just seen a ghost, honey.

Gwen: Yeah.

J.T.: Well? Am I off the hook or not? Do you believe it?

Theresa: Yes. Yes, yes, yes, you fabulous man, yes! Ethan is little Ethan's father. Oh, my gosh, the nun, she told me that I would get this information that would bring Ethan back to me that would bond us together forever. And this is it. Oh, my God, Ethan is little Ethan's father. This is great, thank you.

Norma: Pepperoni and I make a mean pizza pie come to Norma's if hot cheese is your vice I'll cut you a big slice come to Norma's see this bar every little inch try a little pinch is a product of Norma's when my pie's brown and hot you'll be glad that you stopped off at Norma's

Club owner: She is not bad.

Edna: Not bad, honey? She is fabulous. I don't know how she improved like this. Boy, when she sang that awful daddy number at the nuthouse, let me tell you, the patients were begging for electric shock therapy.

Club owner: It's Italy. Here, we are all artists.

Norma: You liked that one, huh? I got a million of 'em!

[Piano music starts]

Norma: Ever since my daddy left me I've been living real close to hell it's down at the end of looney-toon street at straightjacket hotel I get so crazy I get so crazy I get so crazy I could die

Woman in audience: You make me crazy, hot stuff!

Norma: Hey, baby, why don't you come on up here with me and we can dance.



Norma: Oh, my axe I love him so he'll never know the shiny blade I love to hold to cut through bone when his blade cuts into flesh the world is fresh success what's the difference if they scream as my blade gleams I wipe off the blood and soon my blade is clean for whomever my axe hates it's too late decapitate


Norma: Thank you!

Ethan: Isn't this great? Are you not happy for Chad and Whitney?

Gwen: Oh, my gosh, I am -- I am thrilled.

Chad: Well, I got some ice to get. Whitney is waiting.

Ethan: All right.

Chad: I'll see you guys.

Gwen: Ok.

Gwen and Ethan: Wow.

Ethan: Let's go back to the room.

Gwen: Ok. Oh, God, if that nun was right about Chad and Whitney, does that mean Ethan and Theresa are going to get together?

Theresa: You are my hero. I can't believe this.

J.T.: It all works out, the timeline from when you made love with Ethan Winthrop to the birth of little Ethan.

Theresa: Yes, yes, Ethan is little Ethan's father. The -- the nun, she told me that I would get this information that would bond us together forever and this will, J.T., this will.

Fancy: Slow down.

Luis: It's got to be one of these apartments. Which one?

Alistair: You ready now?

Beth: Yeah, let's go. Come on, baby.

Beth: What?

Alistair: It's Luis and Fancy, they are out there. Beth, D.Alhh mae.

Slp weyothe energy to make love in the morning.

Miguel: Maybe tomorrow.

Miguel's voice: Maybe tomorrow you will be back to normal and still love me.

Siren: Why haven't you given in to me yet? That song's worked since the days of Odysseus.

Siren: No, I'm not Kay. I know. I'll dance.

[Siren song playing]

Fox: Hmm, I'd like to see Kay dance like that.

Siren: Oh! Poseidon! I need your horn.

[Siren song playing]

Siren: Can you hear it, Fox? Can you hear it? Imagine me and you in the warm ocean, our bodies being tossed this way and that way by the tide. You are my desire. Make love to me, Fox. Make love to me now.

Tabitha: Oh, no luck, Endora. Siren is too powerful. She is reeling Fox into her net right now. Careful, Endora. Don't let your powers get out of control now.

Siren: What's happening?

Fox: Who cares? Let's make love.

Tabitha: Endora, please, please control your temper. Oh, Endora, stop that this instant. You know, your whammies are hotter than the sun. If you are not careful, you are going to burn the blinking house down. Oh, Endora, there's smoke. There's smoke in the house.

Club owner: I have gay bar and clubs all over Europe. I want to book you two for an exclusive tour.

Norma: Norma's back. I've reached out and touched the hearts of all those little people out there in the dark.

Edna: Look, I am the business end of the deal here. Don't pay attention to her. How much?

Woman: You can name your price.

Edna: That's what I call the fourth of July.

Alistair: How in the hell did they find us?

Beth: What are we going to do now? We are trapped.

Alistair: Shh, shh, shh.

Luis: Did you hear that?

Fancy: What?

Luis: Beth, I know you are in there! Damn you, Alistair. Marty?

Marty: Daddy.

Luis: Damn you! I'm going to get in there and I'm going to make you pay. I want my son.

Kay: What's going on?

Miguel: It can't be another earthquake.

Kay: Ah!

Tabitha: Be careful, Endora. This old Victorian house is all made of wood. Your hot temper could burn our little home to the ground.

Siren: Oh, no, he is coming out of his trance. They can't stop me. Fox will make love to me. Kiss me, you fool, make love to me.

Tabitha: Endora, Endora, that's it. You are getting time-out. You've got to stop this. You could get us all killed.

Whitney: Hey, what took you so long?

Chad: Well, I ran into Ethan and Gwen and I told them that we got back together.

Whitney: Really? Oh, wow, soon everybody is going to know. And the nun, she was right about us. Now, if she is right about Theresa getting the information she needs to bond her to Ethan, I wonder how Gwen is going to handle that.

Chad: Yeah, it's not going to be pretty.

Whitney: No, it's not. Can we just talk about us right now?

Chad: Well, I'm already there, baby.

Ethan: What's wrong?

Gwen: Nothing.

Ethan: It's Theresa, isn't it? Haven't I proved to you on this trip that you don't have to worry about her? You really don't. Our marriage is safe.

Gwen: Honey, I'm sorry. You know, I just -- I have this feeling I can't shake, this feeling that someone is out there working to take everything I hold near and dear away from me, especially you.

Theresa: This information, it's going to bond Ethan to me forever. I mean, he is going to leave Gwen the instant he finds out that he is my son's father.

J.T.: So, we're square, right?

Theresa: Well...

J.T.: Good, see you.

Theresa: Wait, wait, J.T., J.T., just wait a second, please. Oh, why bother? I got to find Ethan. I got to tell him that he is little Ethan's father and that we are going to be a family, finally, the way I always wanted us to be with me and Ethan and Jane and little Ethan, just the way it's supposed to be. It is fate!

On the Next Passions:

Luis: Marty?

Marty: Daddy.

Luis: Daddy's coming for you.

Kay: I love you.

[Kay screams]

Theresa: Ethan is little Ethan's father.

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