Passions Transcript Wednesday 12/21/05 [an error occurred while processing this directive]

Passions Transcript Tuesday-- 12/20/05 Canada; Wednesday 12/21/05--USA
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Provided By Amanda
Proofread by Jodi

[Sheridan and Chris laugh]

Sheridan: Oh, come here, sweetie. Let me fix your scarf. I don't want you catching cold at the town tree lighting. It's such a special night. Hope you love it as much as I do.

Chris: Well, James is -- hasn't been to a tree lighting before, but we're going to fix that. I haven't been to a tree lighting since -- well, since I've been into hiding. It's been years.

Sheridan: Well, welcome back to Christmas. You know, I'd like to gather everyone up to come with us, especially the children. We can ask Tabitha and Endora, Kay and Maria.

Chris: All right.

Sheridan: Maybe Sam and Ivy want to go.

Chris: I don't think they're going to be in the mood because of Ethan's kidnapping.

Sheridan: All the more reason to go. We could all use some cheering up.

James: What's that?

Chris: That -- that's mistletoe. It's a very important plant over  Christmas time. You want me to show you how it works?

Fox: All right.

Kay: Whoo!

Fox: What do you think?

Kay: It looks great.

Fox: Yeah. I think everything's more beautiful under Christmas lights. Everything.

Sam: It looks like the two of them have made up after all, huh?

Ivy: Hmm.

Sam: I'm going to go get some eggnog, all right?

Ivy: Yeah. Oh, I will keep those two apart all night if I have to.

Fox: Uh-oh.

Ivy: Do you want to electrocute yourselves? Please. You've got all your lights all clumped up here together. Here.

Fox: Oh.

Ivy: Let me show you how it's done.

Spike: Hey. Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa. Hey, listen. Open up wide. Your know much better life is when you're high.

Jessica: No.

Spike: Come on.

Jessica: No. No more drugs.

Spike: Oh, I hate it when you get like that. Look, I'm just trying to make you happy.

Jessica: Oh, like turning tricks makes me happy?

Spike: And what's the alternative? Huh? You ran off with your fool friend Simone and see what happened? You got your old friends making fun of you, girls attacking you? No, kid. Look, you're better off sticking with me. Otherwise, you could get hurt.

Jessica: Hmm.

Spike: Come on, little baby. Take it.

Simone: Did you see that? He almost shoved that pill down her throat.

Paloma: Let's just grab her and run.

Simone: No, we can't do that. She's afraid of him, especially after I convinced her to leave him last time. And he's dangerous. He's not going to give her up without a fight.

Paloma: We cannot leave her out on the streets. It's Christmas. She belongs with her family.

Simone: I know, but how do we get her out of here?

Paloma: I think I know. And Roberto here will come in very handy.

Tabitha: Oh. Oh. Well, I'm all packed for Paris. It's time to go before Norma and Edna arrive in town.

Tabitha: Oh. Oh, my darling. You see, Mommy's changed her mind because Norma and Edna are after me and it's too dangerous for you to come with me. Yeah. I want you to stay here in Harmony with Kay. Oh. Oh, I know, my little witchling. I'm going to miss you, too. But, you know, Norma and Edna are a couple of insane fruitcakes. And they want to kill me! And you might get caught in the crossfire, and I can't let that happen. And it'll be easier for me to elude them if I'm on my own. And you don't want to be a little orphan witch, now, do you, huh? Oh. Oh, sweet pea. I wish I could. Oh. Oh, you're making me cry. You don't want Mommy to melt, now, do you? Hmm? That's why I have to run, so you can be safe, because I love you, too. I don't want Norma and Edna to get their hands on you.

Norma: Faster, you nag! Faster! We have to get to Harmony this very night to cut off Tabitha's head!

Mrs. Wallace: Hey, Normy? You did a good job getting us away from those elves, honey.

Norma: They won't be making toys this Christmas. Ah! Faster!

Mrs. Wallace: Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey -- you're not hitting him with that thing, are you?

Norma: Hit a sweet little horsy? You must be mad -- mad, I say! But I can't wait to use it on Tabitha. I'll use it to flay the meat off her evil bones!

Mrs. Wallace: You go, girl. Over the river and through the woods to Tabitha's house we go

Norma: I'll give her a whack with my mighty ax and off her head will go

Both: Oh!


Fancy: Noah, the police are coming. They'll find Ethan and you'll be arrested.

Noah: Ok. Come on, let's go. Go, go, go, go, go.

Theresa: Oh, God. Ethan, the police -- they're coming. They're going to take you off of life support. Look, I'm not going to let that happen. Do you hear me? I won't let that happen.

Gwen: Ok, you know what? The turn for the cabin is coming up ahead, right over there.

F.B.I. Agent: I got it.

Gwen: Just please hurry. I want to get my husband away from that lunatic.

Noah: The police are turning in the drive down by the highway.

Fancy: Oh. We've got to keep them out.

Noah: Wait -- now you want to keep Ethan away from Gwen?

Fancy: Well --

Theresa: I'm not going to let them take you away from me. Do you hear me? I won't let them take you. I won't.

Gwen: Hurry, please hurry.

F.B.I. Agent: Ma'am, we're going as fast as we can.

Gwen: I know. I'm sorry. But I can't believe I hung up on that cop when he called me before. He was trying to warn me that something was going on in the cabin and he was right. Crazy psycho has my husband.

Theresa: Ok, what do we do?

Noah: Look, what can we do, Theresa, ok? The police are coming up the driveway.

Theresa: Let's make a run for it.

Noah: We can't get Ethan out of here, all right? We can't move him that quickly.

Theresa: We've got to try, Noah.

Noah: Look, it is over, Theresa, ok? I'm sorry. Even when we kidnapped him --

Theresa: No, we rescued him, when we rescued him.

Noah: Ok, great, whatever. When we rescued him, we knew that things were going to end badly.

Fancy: You can't give up now, not after all we've done.

Noah: We've done?

Fancy: I helped save his life when the power went off, didn't I?

Noah: Yes, yes, you did.

Fancy: We've got to keep them out.

Noah: Look, you guys, I hate to be the voice of doom here, but, no, wrong, ok? If we resist, somebody could get hurt. It's time to face the music.

Theresa: No, I am not going to give up on him. Ethan? I'm going to protect you. I will protect you with my life.

Fox: Let's put this right in here.

Ivy: No, no, no. Put it further back. Otherwise, the branch is going to droop.

Fox: I think it's going to droop if I put it up here, though.

Ivy: You think you can handle this from now on?

Fox: I don't know. I mean, I can give it a whirl, you know? But remember, I didn't graduate college, so go for it.

Ivy: Oh, Kay, you're really getting the hang of it.

Kay: Yeah, well, it's not my first Christmas tree, Ivy. My mom taught me how to do this.

Ivy: Yeah, well, she's not here, though, is she?

Kay: No, she's not. Hmm. I wonder why.

Ivy: You know, Kay, if you tell anyone what I did to break up Grace and your father, you're going to be in the soup with me.

Kay: How could I forget?

Spike: That pill kicking in yet?

Jessica: Hmm, a little bit.

Spike: Ha-ha. Good girl. You are going to feel good in just a second and you are going to be ready to party.

Simone: Do you really think this will work?

Paloma: Only one way to find out.

Simone: Thank you, Roberto. You are doing a good deed tonight.

Roberto: Hey, if I didn't, Paloma will beat me up.

Paloma: Oye!

Roberto: Hey. Fine.

Paloma: Here, a kiss for good luck.

Simone: I hope this is enough.

Roberto: Oh.

Spike: Ok. It's our lucky night. Here comes a john. Look cute, sweetie. Hey.

Roberto: Hola.

Spike: Hey, what's happening, man?

Roberto: Hey, man. Hey, I talked to somebody. He told me you're the guy who's got the girls I need to hire.

Spike: Really? Well, money talks, amigo. What are you looking for?

Roberto: Well, I have a friend who's having a bachelor party and, you know, I need a girl who could do anything, if you know what I mean.

Spike: Hey, no problema. I got just the one for you. Ok, why don't you give me your cell number, I'll talk to her, I'll call you back.

Roberto: No, man, I don't have time for that. I need a girl right now. The party's starting at any minute, though.

Spike: Oh.

Roberto: How about this one right here?

Spike: Jess? Hey, man, she's no -- she's no party girl, man. She's kind of shy, but let me tell you something. She is great one on one. You got to try her some night.

Simone: Is this going to work?

Paloma: It has to.

Chris: You didn't think we forgot about you, did you? Come on.

Sheridan: No. Christmas is for all of us.

Tabitha: Oh, I'm sorry, Endora. I can't take you with me to Paris. It's too dangerous. And Norma and Edna could show up at this house at any minute with guns and hatchets. Ooh! Well, that's adorable, Endora, but I'm afraid you'll have to wear it in Harmony. Yes, I'm afraid you will, darling, but you'll have lots of fun with Kay. You can stay at the Bennett house. Yes. Yes, and Mommy will be back soon. Yes. Oh, Endora! You've boned up on your French, didn't you? Aw. But I can't risk staying here because Norma is terrifying. She frightened the living daylights out of my Timmy, and she scares me even more, and even the boys -- the boys in the basement are afraid of her. You have no idea how insane she can be.

Norma: Norma's back and ready to hack!

[Tabitha screams]

[Norma screams]

[Tabitha screams]

Norma: Ho, ho, ho! Merry Christmas!

Tabitha: It -- it --

Norma: That's right, Tabby. Norma's home for the holidays!

Tabitha: Oh!

[Tabitha gasps]

[Norma yells]

[Tabitha yells]

Norma: Oh, ax of mine oh, ax of mine how lovely is your sharp blade

Tabitha: And you know those two loonies, Norma and Edna -- they could show up here any moment.

[Loud knock on door]

[Tabitha gasps]

Tabitha: Oh. Oh, it's too late. Oh, they're here already. Oh. Oh, we're going to die.

Sam: You know, I'm going to put on some carols.

Fox: Huh.

Ivy's voice: Kay had better keep my secrets. She has to.

[Christmas music plays]

Fox: You know, I got to tell you, this eggnog is actually pretty good, you know? It's got a little kick to it, but it's good.

Kay: Yeah, it's my mom's recipe.

Fox: Hmm.

Kay: Hmm.

Fox: It's good.

Kay: Wow! Wow, it does have a little kick, huh?

Fox: Yeah.

Kay: Whoo! I've never had it with alcohol in it before. My mom just always made a batch without any for us kids, so -- you know, she used to make the best Santa cookies with this white icing and red sugar. It was so good.

Fox: You miss your mom, huh?

Kay: Yeah. Especially now at Christmas. She was so good at all this sort of stuff.

Fox: This family sort of stuff, you mean?

Kay: Yeah. I just wish she were here so I could tell her how sorry I am.

Fox: Sorry? Sorry for what? You didn't do anything, Kay. She left.

Kay: Yeah, but I was just so angry with her. God, I was such a little snot. I couldn't wait until she left town with David Hastings. But now, you know, Maria, she's growing up so fast and she needs a grandmother. My mom's missing all of that.

Fox: Yeah. Well, you know, I mean, she's got Tabitha. Tabitha's good with her, right?

Kay: Oh, yeah, Tabitha's great. She is, like, the perfect babysitter.

Fox: Mm-hmm.

Kay: Nothing fazes her.

[Knock on door]

Tabitha: Oh. Oh, bloody hell. It's crazy Norma! Oh, Endora. Endora, we've got to -- we've got to go out the back. I'm going to drop you at the Bennetts' and then -- and then I'll hitchhike from the highway. Oh. Oh, yes, of course. Oh, Maria's upstairs. Oh. Oh, why did I ever let humans in my house? What to do? What to do?


Tabitha: Hey, yoo-hoo! Yoo-hoo! Do you think you could watch the human child for just a couple of hours? Oh.

[Angry voices]

Tabitha: Oh, all right! You don't have to bite my head off.

[Tabitha sighs]

Tabitha: Oh, well, maybe I should pour boiling oil on them from my bedroom window. Oh, no. No. Kay used up all the oil when she made fried chicken the other night.

[Tabitha sighs]

Tabitha: Oh! Oh, no! No, no, not Endora! Take me. Take me, don't hurt Endora.

Sheridan: Hurt Endora? What on earth are you talking about?

Tabitha: Oh. Oh, Sheridan. My dear girl. Oh, I thought you were somebody else. I -- did you see anybody lurking around out here? Huh?

Norma: Oh let's go kill Tabby rip her nasty head off

Mrs. Wallace: We'll slice her and dice her and make her into stew

Norma: Ha! Now you're getting in the Christmas spirit!

Mrs. Wallace: Isn't this just fab?

Norma: Ah-ha!

Mrs. Wallace: We are just like Thelma and Louise, you know -- "Edna and Norma."

Norma: "Norma and Edna."

Mrs. Wallace: Hmm.

Norma: And when our sleigh goes over that deadly cliff, Tabitha's going to be strapped in it!

[Norma cackles]

Spike: Hey, sorry I couldn't help you out, buddy. Come back and see me some other time, ok? Hey.

Roberto: Look, man, this girl will do just fine. All right? She's pretty, isn't she?

Spike: Hey, man, look, I told you she is no party girl, ok? I'm just starting to break her in -- got it? Besides, you won't get your money's worth if you come back asking me for a refund.

Roberto: No way.

Spike: Damn right "no way" because all my deals are cash paid upfront in advance.

Roberto: Well, that's cool. I mean, come on, man. This party's already starting. So --

Spike: Yeah. Hey.

Jessica: Huh?

Spike: Listen, babe. You sure you don't want to try your first big group thing?

Jessica: No!

Spike: You heard, brother -- no deal.

Theresa: Don't you worry, Ethan. I won't let Gwen take you from me. That just means death.

Noah: Here they come. I think I see Gwen in the car. Oh, my God, it is all over.

Fancy: You can't give up. We can't give up. We have too much invested in this. You can't let them come in.

Noah: Well, what am I supposed to do, Fancy? Look, those two guys -- they look like detectives or F.B.I. Look, I'm not going to let you get hurt, ok?

F.B.I. Agent: Ma'am, stop. Let us go first.

Gwen: No, I need to get in there with my husband.

F.B.I. Agent: What if they're armed? You could get hurt.

Gwen: The only person who's going to get hurt is Theresa. God. Theresa? Theresa, let me in! I know you're in there! Theresa, let me in! I am with the F.B.I.! This is over!

Theresa: Oh, my God, it's Gwen.

Gwen: I want to see my husband!

Theresa: Never!

Gwen: Fancy, Noah, I know you guys are in there. Let me in!

Fancy: Don't let them come in, please, Noah.

[Pounding on door]

Gwen: Theresa, I am going to kick down this door if you don't let me in right now! I want to see my husband!

Theresa: If you try to take Ethan away from me, it will be the last thing that you do!

Tabitha: Are you sure you didn't see anyone out here -- you know, like a large woman with an ax or a hatchet or --

Chris: No. Why would you ask that?

Tabitha: Oh. Oh, I -- I'm sorry. I -- oh, it's just a -- you know, an old woman living alone in this cruel, cruel world. I get paranoid sometimes when I'm alone at night.

Chris: Well, you know what they say -- just because you're paranoid doesn't mean anybody isn't trying to kill you.

Tabitha: Oh, very comforting, dear.

Tabitha: Oh. Hmm.

Sheridan: Tabitha, are you going somewhere?

Tabitha: Oh, I'm -- I'm just cleaning out my closet -- for the poor.

Sheridan: Oh. How nice of you. Well, are you busy right now because we wanted to invite you and Endora to the town Christmas tree lighting.

Tabitha: Oh. Oh, no, I'm sorry, dear. I -- you see, I'm babysitting for Maria.

Chris: Well, good. We'd like them to come, too. Where is she?

Tabitha: Well, she's next door helping her father trim the tree.

Sheridan: Great. We were on our way over there to ask Sam and Ivy if they want to come with us. So why don't we get Endora and Maria all bundled up?

Tabitha: Oh, now, I don't think so, Sheridan.

Sheridan: Oh, look. She's all ready. How can you disappoint a face like that?

Tabitha: Yeah. How indeed.

Sheridan: Please, Tabitha. I would really like to have all my friends around me this year. You know, with Luis and Marty and now Ethan, it would really mean a lot to me. I'm trying to make a new beginning.

Tabitha: You really know how to work things, don't you? Hmm? Oh, I guess. Well, I'll get Maria and off we go.

Sheridan: Perfect.

Paloma: What is Roberto doing?

Simone: I don't think he's having much luck. Oh, I hope he comes through for us.

Paloma: He's got to.

Spike: What, man, you're still here? All right, look, I know this girl, she's into the group gigs. I'll give her a call, maybe she can jump into a cab.

Roberto: No time for that, man. Don't you listen? I want this girl right now. But if you want me to leave, then --

Spike: That's cool, man. You don't have to get all huffy. Ok? Hey, hey, baby? Hey.

Jessica: Yeah?

Spike: You want to try your first little bachelor -- bachelor thing here? I mean, come on. They're all too drunk to do much anyway.

Jessica: No!

Spike: Huh?

Jessica: I said no, I don't want to.

Spike: Baby, listen to me. You got to see the kind of money this guy's got. Talk about a Merry Christmas -- look at this.

Jessica: Hey. I know you.

Spike: Who is he?

Gwen: Let me in!

[Banging on door]

Gwen: Damn it, Theresa, this is over!

Theresa: Never! I will not hand him over so you can kill him!

Gwen: You have no right to do this, Theresa. You are a criminal. I'm going to make sure you are locked up for good for this! Noah, Fancy, what are you doing? You're accomplices to this! Let me in! You are making things worse for yourself!

F.B.I. Agent: Ma'am, this has gone on long enough.

Gwen: Get -- oh.

F.B.I. Agent: You there inside, open this door or I will shoot it open!

Noah: What did I say, huh? They've got guns.

Fancy: We've dealt with guns before.

Noah: This isn't funny, Fancy, ok? Somebody could get hurt or killed.

F.B.I. Agent: I'll count to three and then I shoot. One --

Fancy: What can we do?

F.B.I. Agent: Two!

Fancy: Don't let them in!

Noah: Look, I've got to, ok? I'm not going to let you get hurt over this. Ok, come in.

Gwen: Where is Ethan?

Noah: He's in the bedroom with Theresa.

Gwen: You are going to be one dead bitch, Theresa! You better open this door!

Theresa: Never!

Gwen: Fine. Open this door, please.

F.B.I. Agent: Cover those two.

Second F.B.I. Agent: Got it.

Agent Banks: Miss Lopez-Fitzgerald, this is Agent Banks of the F.B.I. Open this door immediately or I will shoot the lock.

Theresa: No, don't you dare! You might hit Ethan's respirator!

Agent Banks: Stand back. Move away from the door!

Theresa: Are you crazy? There is a sick man in here! Ah!

Gwen: Get away from my husband.

Theresa: No. You stay away from him. You can't have him. You will just kill him!

Gwen: Get away from Ethan! Oh, my God. Thank God you're still alive. Oh, God. Oh.

Theresa: Of course he's alive! I'm not trying to kill him like you are. Now, get off of him!

Gwen: Get off of me!

Theresa: No, get away from me, please!

Agent Banks: Put your hands up against the wall.

Theresa: Oh. Please, stop it. We've got to save him!

Agent Banks: I will not ask you again. Do it now.

Spike: What do you mean, you know this guy, Jess?

Jessica: Uh --

Spike: Who is he?

Spike: Jess, I asked you a question. Who is he?

Roberto: Listen, she don't know me, I don't know her. But I'm willing to know her better real soon, you know? Huh. You know what I mean.

Paloma: What is he doing?

Simone: Jessica recognizes Roberto.

Paloma: Oy, dios mio. Jessica, please keep your mouth shut.

Spike: You are lying to me. Who are you -- one of her daddy's cop friends?

Roberto: No, man. That's ridiculous.

Spike: Is it? Is it? I want to tell you something. Now, tell me, amigo, why in the hell should I believe you? Hmm?

Ivy: No, be careful, Kay. Just one strand at a time.

Kay: I think I can do it, Iivy.

Sam: Having them decorate the tree together was genius. Looks like they're really warming up to each other.

Ivy: Hmm, yeah, they are, aren't they? I don't want you to hurt Fox, Kay. I just want you to think this through, take some time, sort out your feelings, maybe stay away from Fox and then no one will get hurt.

Kay: I make no promises. Oh. Oh, you better not let your mom see that.

Fox: No, no, no. I want her to see it. It's going to be funny when she flips out. She gets so stressed out around Christmas. Last year I thought her head was going to spin all the way around.

[Knock on door]

Fox: Huh?

Sam: Hey, look who's here!

Fox: Hey.

Sheridan: Oh, Kay, it's beautiful. Isn't the tree just gorgeous, Tabitha?

Tabitha: Yes, yes, very festive.

Kay: Tabitha, maybe we should put one up in your living room, huh? We both know how much you love Christmas trees. Hi, honey. Hi! How have you been?

Sheridan: I don't mean to barge in, but we were just on our way to the town tree lighting. We thought you might like to join us.

Sam: Thank you for thinking of us, Sheridan. That's very nice.

Sheridan: I know how worried you are about Ethan. I thought you could use some Christmas joy. I know I could.

Ivy: It's a lovely idea, Sheridan. Ethan always loved the Christmas tree lighting.

Fox: Yeah, it's a great idea.

Ivy: Well, why don't we just get our coats?

Sam: Yeah.

Tabitha: Kay, Kay? I need to ask you a favor. I have to go out of town. Could you watch Endora for me?

Kay: Sure.

Tabitha: Yeah, and I think it might be better if you both stay here until I get back.

Kay: Why? Has something happened?

Tabitha: No. Not yet.

Kay: What does that mean?

Tabitha: My worst enemy is after me, so I have got to lie low.

Kay: Look, Tabitha, there's no use hiding from God.

Tabitha: No, not that enemy -- Norma!

Kay: That crazy lady that's trying to kill you?

Tabitha: Yes.

Kay: My dad put her back in the insane asylum.

Tabitha: Yes, well, she's out. And she's out to get me, and this time, she's hooked up with Edna Wallace!

Kay: She's alive? Well, at least you'll smell them coming.

Tabitha: Look, Kay, this isn't funny. I can't tell the police because both those broads know that I'm a witch, so if I turn them in, they'll blab. And the next thing I know, Endora and I will be burned at the stake in the town square!

Kay: Oh. Not in this day and age.

Tabitha: Especially in this day and age. Society takes a very dim view lately of alternate lifestyles --

[Endora fusses]

Tabitha: And I'm about -- shh, shh -- I'm about as alternate as you can get. So I just cannot take Endora with me. Something might happen to her, and I love her too much for that. You'll look after her, Kay. She'll be all right with you.

Kay: But I can't control her magic.

Tabitha: Well, do you think I can? Just do your best, dear, and if she makes trouble, then just lie your way out of it. You're good at that. Now, you -- you take her to the tree trimming and then I'll just slip away.

Tabitha: Oh, I'm going to miss you so much, my little witchling. But Mommy has to go so that you can be safe. Oh, I know you don't understand any of this, Endora. But it's for your own good, you see. And I won't be long. And you can stay here and you can play with Kay and Maria and maybe even your new friend James, huh? I know you love Christmas even though it's not part of our creed, but -- but wouldn't you like to stay here and have Christmas with Kay? Huh?

Kay: Huh. Guess what --

Tabitha: Yes?

Kay: I bet Santa's going to come tonight.

[Kay gasps]

Tabitha: Santa.

Kay: Wow. And if you want, I can let you put the angel on top of the Christmas tree.

Tabitha: Oh.

Endora: A big hat.

Tabitha: You do like my hat.

Kay: Come on.

Tabitha: You go see the -- oh!

Kay: Fox!

Endora: Fox.

Fox: Hey!

Kay: Well -- let's go to the tree. Come on. You want Fox to put you up there?

Fox: Let me put this on top of you.

Kay: What's this stuff?

Tabitha: Oh. My sweet Endora.

Kay: Ha! Oh.

Tabitha: How can my heart break if I don't have a heart? Au revoir, sweet pea. Happy -- happy Christmas.

Spike: Si habla ingles, amigo? Who are you?

Paloma: We've got to do something. What if he hurts my Roberto?

Simone: Oh.

Spike: You know, if you're lying to me, I will carve up your pretty little face.

Roberto: Come on, man, calm down. I just want to buy a girl, that's it.

Jessica: Don't hurt him, Spike. I was wrong. He just looked familiar because he looks like that guy on TV -- you know, you know in those car commercials?

Spike: Are you sure?

Jessica: Sure I'm sure. Oh, and, hey, sweetie? I'm at your party.

Spike: Really?

Jessica: Why not? It's Christmas and I want to buy you something nice. Go ahead. Make the deal.

Spike: Oh. Hey, sorry about this, man. But don't worry, brother. It's going to cost you. You all right?

Roberto: It's ok. It'll be worth it.

F.B.I. Agent: Hope you like Christmas in jail. You're under arrest for kidnapping, or at least aiding and abetting.

Noah: Look, she has nothing to do with this, all right? She came up here after the fact.

F.B.I. Agent: I think we'll let a judge sort all that out.

Fancy: It's ok, Noah. I can take my punishment.

Noah: Look, this isn't fair.

Gwen: Thank God I found you. Honey, I was so afraid that you would have slipped away and I wouldn't be able to say goodbye. I love you. I love you so much.

Theresa: You don't love Ethan, Gwen! If you did, you wouldn't want to kill him!

Gwen: You just -- you just don't get it, do you? I love this man more than anything in this world and it kills me to have to let him go, Theresa, but I'm his wife and I need to honor his wishes.

Theresa: You are a liar. You know Ethan doesn't love you. He's always loved me! And since you can't be with him, that's why you want to kill him -- so no one else can have him!

Gwen: You know you're sick? You are sick and you deserve to be locked up and you're going to be.


Theresa: More cops?

Gwen: No, it's the ambulance. It's going to take Ethan back to the hospital.

Theresa: No. No, you are not going to kill him. I'm not going to let you kill him! No!

Agent Banks: Hey, up against the wall.

Theresa: Ah!

Agent Banks: Against the wall.

Theresa: All right.

Agent Banks: You are under arrest for the kidnapping of Ethan Winthrop.

Theresa: God.

Agent Banks: Let me read you your rights.

Gwen: Don't even bother. She probably knows them by heart.

Theresa: No. No, this isn't over, Gwen!

Gwen: Theresa, it is over.

Theresa: No, Ethan, wake up! Ethan, wake up! Let me go!

Spike: Ah, it's a pleasure doing business with you, friend.

Roberto: Yeah, sure. Come on, let's go.

Jessica: Ok.

Spike: Hey, hey, don't be bringing her back with any bruises. My customers do not like that.

Jessica: Hmm.

Spike: Take care, sweetie.

Jessica: Bye.

Spike: Whoo!

Paloma: Hey!

Jessica: Oh, hey.

Simone: Merry Christmas, Jess.

Jessica: Hey! Oh, wait -- what are you guys doing here?

Paloma: We've come to take you home, silly.

Simone: Yeah.

Paloma: Gracias, mi amor.

Simone: Let's get you home and clean you up. This is no place to spend Christmas.

Jessica: Ok.

Simone: It's time to be with your family. Let's go.

Tabitha: I'll be back as soon as I can, Endora, all right? You be a good little girl for Auntie Kay, huh? Do as you're told. Mind your manners and keep your magical powers to yourself, ok? Oh. I don't want to go. But it's for the best. It's for the best, ok?

Sheridan: Come on, Tabitha. Let's get to the park.

Tabitha: Oh -- oh, I'm sorry. I -- I didn't tell you. I can't go. I -- I have some errands to run.

Sheridan: Oh, I'm -- I'm so sorry.

Tabitha: No, it's -- not to worry. Yeah. She's in very good hands. You go with Kay. Go with Auntie Kay. Ok, darling. Yes.

Tabitha: Oh -- oh, Kay -- Kay, don't forget to read her her "Harry Potter" at bedtime. She's crazy about Lord Voldemort. Huh. Oh. It's my first parting from my little one. But I know it's for the best. Ooh! Oh, jumping genie. I better get out of dodge.

Norma: On the 10th day of Christmas my daddy gave to me 10 Tabby fingers

Mrs. Wallace: Nine of Tabby's ribs

Norma: Eight of Tabby's eyeballs

Mrs. Wallace: Hold it! Hold it -- I still don't get that one, for heaven's sakes. The woman has got two eyeballs. Now, how come Daddy's giving you eight?

Norma: [As Daddy] If my buttercup wants eight eyeballs, she'll get eight eyeballs!

Mrs. Wallace: Okey-dokey. Peachy keen with me, honey. Look, how would you like to have another Christmas sip?

Norma: Don't mind if I do.

[Normal voice] Oh, Daddy. Ooh.

Mrs. Wallace: Hey! I knew Daddy looked familiar to me. Oh, yes, it was the fourth of July in Schenectady in 1964. Then we went out to Daddy's truck. Couldn't hold your liquor back then, either, could you, Daddy? Hey, hey, hey! Look, we're only 20 miles from Harmony.

Norma: 20 more miles. Then it's mince Tabby pie for Christmas.

[Norma slurps]

Mrs. Wallace: Ok, you go ahead and chow down on that. I'm just sticking with the gin, honey.

Norma: Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Giddyap! Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!

Gwen: Just be careful with him. He's been through a lot.

Medic: Don't worry, ma'am. We'll take good care of him.

Agent Banks: Get those two in the car.

F.B.I. Agent: On your feet.

Gwen: How could you do this to me? How could you help Theresa? I thought you were my friends.

Fancy: I am your friend, Gwen.

Gwen: Fancy, I saw you slap Theresa's face, and now you're helping her?

Noah: Gwen, look, she didn't know anything about this, ok? She didn't know until she followed me up here. I swear.

Gwen: Well, what about you? Why would you ever participate in something like this? You know, forget about me, Noah. What about your dad? You know what you're doing to him? What you're doing to Fancy's mother? This is insane.

Noah: Look, after everything was said and done, I thought that Ethan deserved another chance at life.

Gwen: Do you think I want to take him off life support? This is destroying me, and you're just making things worse.

Noah: Look, I'm sorry.

Theresa: Look, I want to ride in the ambulance with Ethan.

Gwen: I am going in the ambulance with Ethan. You're going to jail where you belong. You're never going to see Ethan again. Please get her out of my sight.

Fancy: Merry Christmas, Gwen.

Theresa: No, no. No, Ethan needs me. Let me go! Ethan, wake up! She's going to kill you! Ethan, wake up! Please, wake up!

On the Next Passions:

Theresa: I'm not leaving, Gwen. I'm going to stay here to make sure you don't kill Ethan.

Gwen: I'm not going to kill Ethan. I'm going to kill you.

Norma: Giddyap!

Officer: I said stop!

Pilar: Dios mio, fire!

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