Passions Transcript Wednesday 11/16/05 [an error occurred while processing this directive]

Passions Transcript Wednesday 11/16/05
 
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Provided By Eric
Proofread by Jodi

Theresa: Look, Dr. Russell, she did this report on Ethan's condition, ok? It says that he can't live without artificial means, that his brain damage looks to be permanent. So Dr. Russell asked Gwen if Ethan had a living will. Gwen found it, and in it, Ethan wrote that he doesn't want to be kept alive by machines, so Gwen is going to turn off his life-support system. She is going to kill him.

Gwen: Oh, my God, Ethan, it has really come to this, hasn't it? Theresa poisoned you and she put us in this nightmare, and I hope she burns in hell for what she's done.

[Phone rings]

Gwen: Hello?

Eve: Hello, Gwen? Hi, it's Eve.

Gwen: Eve, has there been any change in Ethan's condition?

Eve: No, no. I just wanted to know if you'd located his living will.

Gwen: Yeah, I did, and I'll be back at the hospital soon.

Eve: I'll be here. And, Gwen, I'm so sorry. I've been through this with other couples and it's really brutal. It takes a lot of courage.

Gwen: Well, you know, I wouldn't have to do this if it weren't for Theresa. She's the one who deserves to die.

Eve: Let's just keep our attention on Ethan, ok?

Gwen: I know. I know. I'll be -- I'll be there shortly, ok?

Julian: I tell you, he looks so strong. It's -- it's as if he would just wake up and start arguing with me if we'd take that thing out of his mouth.

Eve: God, I wish that were true.

Julian: So you really think there's no hope?

Eve: Well, I've ordered another round of tests, but the prognosis is pretty grim, Julian. It's pretty grim.

T.C.: Hey. Scotch on the rocks. Make it a double.

Bartender: Coming right up.

Liz: T.C. I didn't expect to see you come in here to the Blue Note. Would you like to share a table?

T.C.: Nope. I just want a drink.

Liz: What's wrong, T.C.?

T.C.: Well, I went by the hospital to speak to Eve, and she was with Julian.

Liz: Well, what did you expect? I told you she'd break your heart. Oh, T.C., wake up. Eve has moved on, and it's long past time for you to move on.

T.C.: Liz, I don't want to hear your poison about Eve anymore. You got it?

Liz: T.C., I know what you need. You need a woman who will love you, a woman that you'll never find in the arms of another man, and that's me.

[Music plays]

[Esme squeals]

Esme: Oh, I never knew I could dance so well.

Noah: Ah, you just never found the right partner.

Esme: Oh, well --

[Wristwatch beeps]

Noah: So that's the end of an hour, Esme. Tell me when you want me to go off-duty, because I am on double time.

Esme: Oh, well, what's a little more of daddy's money? I may never want you to leave.

Noah: Oh --

Fancy: My glass is empty, and our waiter disappeared.

Noah: Not a problem. I'll get you some more champagne.

Esme: Ooh, isn't he gorgeous?

Fancy: Yeah, if you like plastic boy toys.

Esme: What is wrong with you, Fancy? We have a killer hunk right in there, and you're acting like he's got rabies.

Fancy: What's wrong with me? It's tacky to pay a guy to go out with you. You're hot -- almost as hot as me.

Esme: Oh, well, thank you very much.

Fancy: Well, it's true. You could have any man you want.

Esme: I know. I do, and I have, and he's right in there, and his name is -- ooh, it is --

Fancy: Noah.

Esme: Right. Whatever.

Chris: Are you ready to order dinner, Sheridan? Sheridan?

Sheridan: What? I'm -- I'm sorry.

Chris: You're worrying about James again, aren't you?

Sheridan: I'm sorry.

Chris: He's back at the B&B and he's safe with Paloma and Roberto.

Sheridan: I know, and I'm acting silly, but I can't help it. I just have this crazy feeling that my half sister, Beth, is going to swoop down and take James just like she took Marty. I wish I could stop worrying, but I can't. I just can't.

Roberto: Ok. Well, I don't know when Sheridan will be back, but I got your name. Will she know who you are, Beth?

Beth: Oh, you bet. Sheridan and I -- we -- we go way back.

Kay: Ok, what do you mean, we won't be engaged? What about that whole "life together for a hundred years" and all that?

Fox: No, wait, wait. No, you misunderstood. I didn't -- in other words, it took your dad and my mom years to finally be together, right? And all I'm saying is you love me, I love you, and nothing's standing in our way.

Kay's voice: Yes. Nothing will stand in our way, now that your mother is off my back.

Gwen: Isn't he handsome? I always thought he looked like a Greek god. He could pose for a statue.

Julian: I'm so sorry, Gwen.

Gwen: Oh, God, "sorry" doesn't really seem to cover this, does it? Eve, if your tests are right, I mean, that's not even Ethan anymore.

Eve: We're still waiting for the results. Do you have the living will?

Gwen: I do.

Gwen: Honey, do I really have to do this? I don't know if I can do this.

Theresa: Now, look, Dr. Russell -- she took these new tests, and if the results are the same as the old test, Gwen will carry out Ethan's wishes and she will turn his life-support system off!

Ivy: Why is Gwen in this horrible position, Theresa? Why? Because of you --

Sam: Maybe we shouldn't get into that right now, ok? Maybe we should go talk to Gwen.

Ivy: Yes, absolutely, because maybe Gwen can give us the whole story.

Theresa: Fine, Ivy, fine. Please, whatever you think of me, just in this moment, can you think of your son, please, your firstborn, and let's go to the hospital right now, and you can stop Gwen from killing Ethan. Let's go. Come on.

Esme: Mmm. Is that a specimen or what? Talk about the lucky gene club. Thank God he's got a mortgage to pay so he'll keep taking my money.

Fancy: This is sick. You're taking advantage of a poor schlub who has to help pay his father's mortgage and has to find even more money to help pay his whacked-out sister's therapy fees.

Esme: Ok, hang on a minute there, miss thing. Why do you know so much about this guy? Have you already had him? Oh, is that what this is about? Are you involved with him?

Chris: Let's toast to the future. To my new life with James here in Harmony, and to a long, full, healthy life free of fear.

Sheridan: I'll drink to that.

Chris: What is it?

Sheridan: It's James. We have to call Paloma and Roberto to make sure he's all right.

Chris: Sheridan, he's fine.

Sheridan: No, no, this horrible feeling just came over me and I can't ignore it. It's happened before. Something's wrong, I can feel it.

Roberto: Beth, can I have your phone number so I can have Sheridan call you?

Beth: Oh, I'm sorry, I'm traveling, so I'll have to call her back. Where did she go tonight?

Roberto: Oh, she went to the Seascape for a fancy dinner with her boyfriend.

Beth: Her what?

Roberto: Her boyfriend, a very nice guy. Oh, and also he has a very nice kid, too. Sheridan loves him.

Beth: How nice for her. Uh -- listen, Roberto, I've got to run, so you just tell Sheridan that I'll call her, ok?

Roberto: Will do. I wrote down the message.

Beth: Bye, now.

Roberto: Adios.

Paloma: Who was that?

Roberto: It was a friend of Sheridan's -- Beth?

Paloma: Dios mio. Beth?

Beth: Marty, are you doing ok? Mommy has to make some more calls. All right?

Beth: My Luis is barely cold in a grave, and you've moved on to another man? How dare you. Well, the gloves are off, Sheridan. I will destroy you.

Esme: Out with it, Fancy. I know you, and you are the worst liar in history. What do you know about this Moses character?

Fancy: It's Noah. Remember? The ark, all the animals?

Esme: Who can remember all these biblical names?

Fancy: I don't know him. I just heard him talking about his problems earlier on the phone.

Esme: Well, fine. So he has bills to pay and I'm helping him pay them. Get over yourself, and get out from under that black cloud hovering above your head.

Fancy: Why do you want to fool around with Noah, anyway? I thought you were still all hot and heavy with Lord Sarni in England.

Esme: It d-d-d-didn't work out.

Fancy: Stop it. Poor guy can't help it if he stutters.

Esme: Whatever, I've moved on. I deserve a treat, and he's right in there, and his name is -- what is his name, Methuselah?

Fancy: Noah.

Esme: Oh. Gotcha.

Noah: Here we go, ladies.

Esme: Thank you.

Noah: Excuse me.

Esme: Aren't you going to say "thank you," Fancy?

Fancy: Mm-hmm. Ditto.

Noah: You're welcome.

[Music plays]

Noah: Would you care to dance again, Esme?

Esme: Oh, no, you've tired me out. But Fancy will. Won't you, Fancy?

Noah and Fancy: No.

Esme: Ok, what is with you two? Are you sure you don't know each other?

Fancy: No.

Noah: Nope. But I've seen her type before.

Esme: Then what is the big deal about one little dance, Fance?

Fancy: It's no big deal. Why are you overreacting?

Esme: Well, I'm paying by the hour, and if I'm not going to use -- dance with him, then at least you should. Unless you think that you're not as good of a dancer as he?

Fancy: Oh, I dance way better than him.

Noah: Prove it.

[Phone rings]

Kay: Oh, hold on. Oh. Oh, that's weird -- it's a text message from my dad.

Fox: A text -- why didn't he just yell at you, you know? They're right inside the --

Kay: Oh, no, they're not.

Fox: Huh.

Kay: Oh, their car's gone. We didn't even hear them leave.

Fox: Yeah, well, you know, we had better things to do.

Kay: Let me see what it says. Oh, no, they're going to the hospital.

Fox: You're kidding. Ethan must've taken a turn for the worse.

Kay: We should probably go.

Fox: Yeah, ok.

Liz: T.C., get Eve out of your head. She's gone. You need a real woman, a woman who thinks about you first, and that's me. Now, listen, I know that we had our differences --

T.C.: Our differences?

Liz: And maybe I went too far. But I did it for you, T.C. Forgive me? I am true blue. I will never go out looking for another man.

T.C.: We need to get one thing straight, Liz. There is no you or me, all right? It'll never work. Maybe Eve is out of my life, but I still love her. I will always love her. You know, I'm going to get out of here. I need to go to a real bar where I can drink in peace.

Liz: No, T.C., just --

Liz: For goodness' sake, Michael, if somebody leaves a newspaper on the bar, don't just leave it there. It looks sloppy!

Michael: I'm sorry, boss.

Liz: All my work, all my planning, for nothing. Eve still has it all. T.C. loves her, Julian loves her. Even Whitney and Simone can't stay away from her. Well, I'm not through with you yet, sister. I'm going to ruin your life if it's the last thing I do.

Julian: I tell you, there was so much I needed to -- to talk to Ethan about -- the way I treated him when I found out he wasn't my biological son, how I turned my back on him.

Eve: He forgave you. He had a chance to see you become a wonderful human being over the past few years.

Julian: I pray with everything I have in my soul that you're wrong about him. I want a chance to make up for my selfish behavior. I need the chance.

Sam: Theresa, whoa --

Theresa: Get away from him, Gwen!

Sam: Whoa!

Theresa: I won't let you kill him! I won't!

Theresa: Gwen, please, please don't do this. Please don't kill Ethan!

Gwen: Theresa, you need to shut up and get out of here. You have no right to be here. Sam, please get rid of her.

Ivy: Ok, stop it, both of you! Please, Eve, this is our son. Could you explain what is going on? Is Theresa right? Is Gwen going to take him off life-support?

Eve: Theresa is overreacting.

Gwen: What a surprise.

Theresa: I am trying to save Ethan's life!

Gwen: You are the one who killed him.

Eve: That is enough. Please, this is not about you, it's about Ethan. Now, what if I'm wrong and he can hear every word that you're saying? You think he'd be proud of either one of you?

Gwen: No.

Sam: You calm?

Theresa: Yes.

Eve: I'm sure that you've heard most of the story. We ran tests on Ethan, there was no brain activity, so I asked Gwen to find Ethan's living will. She did, and now I'm running some more tests to confirm my earlier diagnosis. We don't even know if the living will has come into play yet, so there's no reason for anyone to get excited.

Ivy: Gwen, if the -- if the test results come back and they're bad, are you -- are you going to do it? Are you going to take Ethan off life-support?

Gwen: Ivy, it's complicated.

Ivy: You could do it?

Julian: I think I'm -- I'm intruding. You all -- you all know you have my best wishes.

Ivy: Julian, this must be killing you. You know, for so many years, he was our little boy.

Julian: Theresa, why don't you come with me. You don't belong here.

Theresa: No. My place is by Ethan's side, Julian.

Gwen: The hell it is.

Ivy: Gwen, please.

Sam: Theresa, you can stay in the room as long as you stay calm, all right? So that's it, Gwen? If the test results are bad, you're going to pull the plug on my son?

Gwen: I'm sorry, Sam, but it's Ethan's wishes, not mine.

Theresa: No.

[Music plays]

Noah: Are you satisfied with my dancing, ma'am? I want to make sure all my clients are satisfied.

Fancy: Knock it off, you jerk face.

Noah: Aw. "Jerk face" -- there's a nasty expression. You know, I have to make sure all of my clients are happy. And what she wants is for you to have a good time.

Fancy: Leave me out of this. She's the one paying the gigolo, not me.

Noah: "Escort" is a much nicer word.

Fancy: Hmm, I could think of a few others. Go give her a good time.

Noah: Trust me, I will -- later. You can count on it.

Fancy: You're disgusting. Do you know that?

Noah: Esme doesn't think so. Hmm.

Sheridan: I can't ignore feeling like this. I've got to call and make sure that James is all right.

Chris: I'm sure he's fine, but if it'll make you feel better --

Sheridan: Thank you.

Waiter: Miss Crane, there's an urgent phone call for you.

Sheridan: What did I tell you? Where's the phone?

Waiter: Right this way.

Sheridan: Paloma? Is James ok?

Beth: Sher-sher, is that you? How's the date going?

Sheridan: Beth!

Beth: Ta-da! You miss me any? I just wanted to call you on your date and ask you a quick question. How could you replace Luis and Marty so fast and just move on with your life? What kind of a whore are you?

Liz: Julian, what are you doing here? I thought you'd be off sucking face with your precious Eve.

Julian: She happens to be at the hospital with Ethan.

Liz: Oh. That's right. I'm sorry. What a tragedy.

Julian: Yes, it is. Even though he wasn't really my son, I raised him, and -- no, not really. I barely paid attention to him all those years. But he was still my son.

Liz: I never had a child to care for.

Julian: Neither did I. Is that it, Liz?

Liz: What?

Julian: You know, I've heard so much garbage come out of your mouth, I never know what to believe, but is -- is that the real reason that you -- you hate Eve? Because she had children and you didn't? Liz?

Liz: You don't know anything.

Paloma: Would you turn up the volume?

Roberto: Sure.

Paloma: What? What's so funny?

Roberto: You haven't been in the states too long, have you? Well, kids play a game called "spin the bottle."

Paloma: I know all about "spin the bottle."

Roberto: Well, look, the bottle is pointing right at you.

Paloma: So?

Roberto: So, that means that you owe me a kiss.

Paloma: A kiss? They told me about boys like you back in school. What would Sister Emilia say?

Roberto: Well, she would say that it's time for you to pay your debt.

Ivy: Oh, God. Oh, God, my Ethan.

Theresa: Just burn that thing, please!

Gwen: Theresa, this is what Ethan wanted, ok?

Ivy: Gwen, my son can't -- can't die, because he's my baby. He's my -- he's my son.

Theresa: Ivy, please, please listen to me. Don't let her kill him. She doesn't have to kill him. Gwen, please don't do this! Give him a chance to live, please!

Fox: What happened? What happened?

Theresa: Fox, I need you to help me here! Stop her! Stop Gwen! I mean, Ethan -- he signed this living will, and now she's ready to turn his life-support system off.

Kay: What?

Gwen: Ok, what -- what you need to do right now is shut up. Because you don't have any idea of what you're talking about. We are still waiting for test results to get back to see if Ethan has brain activity left. I don't have to do anything.

Theresa: Look, Gwen, don't tell me to shut up! You've already decided what you're going to do! You're going to take him off life-support if those results come back and they're not positive!

Gwen: You shut up! This is not my decision, Theresa, this is Ethan's decision! Do you see this? This is not a stupid living will, this is a living will! If need be, he wants to die with dignity! How dare you!

Kay: Ivy, I am so sorry.

Fox: What a position to be in, huh?

Kay: Yeah.

Gwen: Ivy, if it comes down to this, you need to know that I don't want to do this. I don't want to do this. But this isn't my decision. As Ethan's wife, I have to do what he wanted.

Ivy: I know. And --

Gwen: I didn't do this, Theresa did this. All of her talk about love -- what happened? My husband is lying close to death in a hospital bed. So please look out for Fox and please make sure he doesn't get involved with the wrong woman because it could be lethal.

Chris: Is that Beth? Keep her going as long as possible. Maybe the F.B.I. can trace her call.

Sheridan: Where is Marty?

Beth: Marty? Why would you care? I heard that you replaced him with another little boy. That is so sweet. Wow, a new boyfriend, a new son. Your life's pretty peachy, isn't it?

Sheridan: You know that's not true. Damn you, Beth. Bring my son back.

Beth: Your son? Ahem -- he's my son, Sheridan. He calls me Mommy. He would not remember you from a hole in the wall.

Sheridan: It's not true. It can't be. I want my boy.

Beth: You don't deserve your boy. Ok, you killed Luis. You killed his father. This is all your fault. You -- you sent him to look for Marty knowing that -- that Alistair would never allow it. You sentenced him to his death, Sheridan. He's dead because of you.

Julian: What did I say?

Liz: Go away, Julian.

Julian: Does this have something to do with the way your father abused you? Can't you have children?

Liz: Yes, Daddy hurt me. And I had to have an operation. I thought that I could have children. But --

Julian: What happened?

Liz: What happened? I met you, Julian. It's your fault that I could never have children!

Roberto: Should we spin the bottle again?

Paloma: You already won the first prize.

Roberto: Ay, Paloma, I'm so happy that you invited me to babysit. I'm going to help you, because it's like practicing for when I have my own son.

Paloma: That's what you want? A family?

Roberto: Sure. One day I would like to have a wife, a son, a beautiful house, a yard, maybe a daughter, vacations at the beach.

Paloma: Well, that's not my dream. I want to finish my education and find a good career. Years and years from now, when I'm rich and successful, maybe, just maybe I'll get married.

Roberto: Yeah, sure. You and the rest of what they call liberated women.

Paloma: What's wrong with that?

Roberto: Nothing. It's just that going out there and work yourself to death? No, I like an old-fashioned girl, a wife who wants to stay home with her kids.

Paloma: Oh, a mamacita sweating behind the stove, stirring the rice and the frijoles?

Roberto: It doesn't have to be like that.

Paloma: Uh-huh, yeah. So if I want a career, I'm not good enough for you?

Roberto: I didn't say that.

Paloma: You didn't have to. I'm good enough to play "spin the bottle" with, but I'm not good enough to marry?

Roberto: What?

Paloma: Who do you think you are, telling me I'm not good enough for you? Quien crees que eres tu?

Roberto: Wait, I didn't say that. You said that! Paloma! Paloma Lopez-Fitzgerald!

Eve: Look, there's no sense in putting yourself through all this emotional turmoil until we get the test results back and we know what's what.

Gwen: You both know how much I love Ethan. And if I have to do this, you need to know that it's going to kill me, but I don't have a choice. These are Ethan's wishes, and as his wife, I need to do what he wanted.

Sam: Yeah, what a sad choice you have to make.

Gwen: Sam, it's not my choice. It's Ethan's choice. Please don't hate me if I have to do this.

Ivy: No, no. Never. I'd never hate you.

Gwen: Oh, you get away from my husband. Get out of here. Get out of here, Theresa!

Theresa: No! I love him and I want him to live!

Gwen: And what? You think I want him to die? Are you crazy?

Sam: All right, all right, all right --

Gwen: No, no, no --

Sam: Gwen, calm down.

Gwen: Enough is enough. You are out of here. Once and for all, you're getting thrown out.

Theresa: Oh, try it, Gwen.

Gwen: Security, please. I need someone in I.C.U. immediately.

[Music plays]

Noah: You really are beautiful, the most gorgeous creature I've ever seen.

Fancy: That's what I thought about you.

Fancy: Noah, I --

Noah: Did you enjoy the dancing, ma'am? I try to give good service to all my clients. You know, my business is all word of mouth.

Fancy: Your business? Damn you, Noah Bennett.

Esme: Fancy, where are you going? I mean, I saw you out there. You were having a good time. Get back out there.

Fancy: I think not, though he was an adequate dancer.

Esme: Oh, adequate? Oh, no. Look, it is Prescott Allen. We should go say hi.

Fancy: Oh, I can't bear him. He can't keep his hands to himself.

Esme: Hmm, never could. Well, I'll say hi for you.

Noah: You playing hot-and-cold again?

Fancy: Don't talk to me like that. You're the damn gigolo.

Noah: Hey, look, I'm broke, all right? And why do you care how I make my money?

Fancy: You're right, I don't.

Noah: Good. Then stop treating me like dirt for doing my job.

Fancy: Sure. Go ahead, take Esme's money, and kiss her --

Noah: Oh, I will, trust me. But later. Unless you don't want me to.

Sheridan: How dare you say Luis' death is my fault. You kidnapped our son. He would be alive and well right now if it weren't for you.

Beth: You go to hell, Sheridan. It's time to hang up now.

Sheridan: No! I mean, no. Talk to me. You have no idea what this is doing to me. I love Marty more than anything in the world. I can't bear to not be a part of his life.

Beth: You made your choice.

Sheridan: No, you made it for me. Please bring Marty back. No questions asked -- no police, no jail. Just bring Marty home. I'll give you anything you want. Anything.

Beth: Do you think I'm an idiot? You would have me arrested in two seconds flat. Besides, I have everything that I want. Daddy has been most generous. He -- he's given me the world. And Marty.

Sheridan: Let me see my son. I love him. He's all I have now.

Chris: Just a couple more minutes and the F.B.I. will know her location.

Sheridan: Please let me see my son.

Paloma: I'm sorry I lost my temper. It's just I want to make sure I always stay strong and independent.

Roberto: I understand. That's good.

Paloma: Well, next time you spin that bottle, make sure it points at me.

Roberto: Well, you are the only woman in the room.

Paloma: Mm-hmm. And I'm the only woman in your life.

Julian: What are you talking about? What do you mean that you can't have children because of me?

Liz: It's because of the night we spent together, Julian -- all those years ago, the night you claim not to remember.

Julian: Well, I don't.

Liz: I do. I remember how you hurt me, damaged me. I had to have another operation, Julian. And because of it, I could never think about having children.

Fancy: I don't care what you do or who you're with, especially Esme.

Noah: So nothing I do affects you?

Fancy: Not even a little. Not even enough to spill a drink over.

Noah: Fine.

Fancy: Hmm.

Noah: We'll see about that. Excuse me, sir. I'm going to borrow her for a second.

Esme: Oh. Ooh.

Sheridan: Please bring Marty back.

Beth: You're so tedious when you beg, Sheridan. And Daddy doesn't like Cranes to beg. Besides, what's all this drama over Marty, anyway? You don't -- you don't need him anymore. You've already replaced him with -- with another boy. You've replaced Luis with another man.

Sheridan: That's not true.

Beth: Ok, who's the man that you're with right now, Sheridan? Marty, say "night-night."

Marty: Night-night.

Sheridan: He's right there?

Beth: Of course. He's so adorable, even though he's -- he's wearing a black armband because, you know, he's in mourning over his father, someone you've forgotten.

Sheridan: No. No, I haven't. Marty, Mommy loves you!

Beth: It's time to hang up now, Sheridan. You will never see Marty ever again.

Sheridan: No, Beth! No, no!

Chris: Damn. The F.B.I. almost had that call traced.

Sheridan: She hung up on me. She said I'd never see Marty again.

Chris: Sheridan --

Gwen: You're going to be on the street if I have to kick you there myself.

Theresa: I'm not going anywhere.

Guard: Who called us?

Gwen: I did. This woman is causing a scene in my husband's room. Please get rid of her.

Guard: Ma'am, you have to come with us.

Theresa: No, no, I don't. I don't.

Ivy: Just take her out of here, because she has no right to be here.

Theresa: No, please.

Guard: Grab her.

Theresa: Stop it!

Guard: Don't make a fuss.

Theresa: No. Fox? Please, Kay. Help me, please. Please, I need to be here for Ethan! Please say something!

Sam: Sorry, Theresa, I can't do anything.

Theresa: No, Dr. Russell, please!

Guard: Calm down, ma'am.

Theresa: No, let me go!

Eve: This is Gwen's husband. I can't interfere.

Theresa: No, don't kill him! Please, I love him! Don't kill him, please! Don't kill him! Don't!

On the Next Passions:

Sheridan: Luis, you can't. You're dead.

Luis: I'm here.

Theresa: I need you to stop Gwen, Alistair.

Alistair: Yes, would you transfer me to --

Theresa: I.C.U.

Esme: Good night, Fancy.

Fancy: You two have fun -- if this is what you call fun.

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