Tuesday 4/6/05--Canada; Wednesday 4/7/05--USA
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Proofread by Jodi
Fox: That's not true.
Fox: Yes, really. I'm switching to champagne.
Gwen: I hate you so much right now, Fox. We are all stuck here in this ridiculous prison and you're not even going to lift a finger to help us.
Fox: It's a pretty spiffy-looking prison, if you ask me. What's wrong with you, huh? Why don't you relax, let your hair down? You can't beat 'em, join 'em. So join me. Oh, great. Can't waste it. Well, how about you?
Guard: I can't drink on duty, monsieur.
Fox: You got to be kidding me. "Zing" just went the strings of my heart. Let me ask you a question, then -- being French, you realize, of course, that champagne isn't really a drink, per se, but more like a soda pop mixed with giggles, right? That's what I thought. Well, here. You say, "Salut." I'll say, "bottoms up."
Alistair: Get used to it, Katherine. Get used to it. No more -- no more kisses from your namby-pamby Martin. Because I'm a real man, and I've got you exactly where I want you.
Katherine: In prison!
Alistair: No! In bed, where you belong! What's the matter? What's the matter? What's the matter? Did Martin throw rose petals on the bed before you two made love? Well, that's just not my style.
Katherine: Can we just get this over with?
Alistair: Oh, why, what's the rush? I'm going to make you sorry for all those years you were away from me. No, I'll make you very sorry.
Theresa: Do you want to go to the NICU and see your son before we go?
Whitney: No. No, I don't. I've already signed the adoption papers, so it's done. It's not my baby anymore. All I want to do is go home. You know, I really don't like hospitals anyway.
Ethan: I'll drive you home.
Whitney: Thanks, Ethan.
Nurse: Oh, Ms. Russell. I am so glad I caught you. I heard you were checking out and I wanted to make sure you got your basket. We always give new mothers a basket for their first few days at home with their brand-new bundle of joy. Look -- baby bottles and diapers and a thermometer, baby wipes, baby powder. Oh, and look at these. The teeniest little set of nail clippers you ever saw. Aren't they adorable? You'll have fun these first few days. You're going to treasure these days.
Theresa: Excuse me, ma'am, I don't think you've heard --
Nurse: Oh, and smell this. That baby powder smell? , One whiff of that and it takes me right back to when I brought my little boy home.
Chad: Yes, yes, I'm still holding. I'll hold forever if I have to. This is too important. I won't hang up until I find out what I need to know.
Beth: Sheridan? Sheridan? Hey. Come on, stop fooling. Sheridan? Did I kill her? Wake up! Come on, don't just lay there like a sack of lard! Huh. I killed her. It's too good to be true. Huh. Maybe I did. Oh, damn. She's still breathing. I've got to finish the job before she wakes up. I need a poker.
Beth: I'll bash her head in till she's good and dead. Or should I use an ax? No, it's too much blood. Ew. It might scare Marty when he wakes up. Oh, duh! I'll strangle her. No fuss, no muss. Stupid, stupid blond bimbo. You deserve this. Get ready! Here I come.
Luis: My god, what happened? Beth? Sheridan? Sheridan? Beth, what happened? What the hell happened? Hey.
Luis: Answer me, Beth, what happened to Sheridan? Did you hurt her?
Beth: Me? Me? No. God, no.
Luis: She's breathing. Why is she unconscious? Sheridan, come on, wake up.
Beth: It's not my fault. I just came to pick up Marty, and then she --
Luis: Marty? Why Marty? Marty's staying with us for a few more days. Darling, come on, wake up.
Beth: Well, that was before I found out that she lost him in her own front yard.
Luis: How'd you know about that? Sheridan, come on, wake up.
Beth: Look, I won't let my son stay with some woman who neglects him. So I tried to take Marty. She went ballistic on me, Luis. She started hitting me and hitting me.
Luis: Well, it doesn't look like she hurt you.
Beth: Well, I defended myself to -- to keep her away. But then she said she wouldn't let me take her son.
Luis: Not again.
Beth: I tried to tell her that she was wrong, that Marty's my child. She flipped out on me, Luis. She called me a liar.
Luis: So how did she end up unconscious on the floor?
Beth: She came at me like a banshee. She was clawing at me, Luis, like she wanted to kill me. I was afraid for my life.
Luis: Oh, come on, Beth, you know that Sheridan would never hurt anyone.
Beth: She certainly tried to hurt me. I mean, I defended myself, but she wouldn't stop. And then I tried to push her away, I begged her to stop hitting me, and, I don't know, she tripped, you know? She fell back. I think she hit her head on the floor.
Luis: Oh, my god.
Beth: I was trying to revive her when you came. Oh, god, Luis, I would just die if something happened to Sheridan. Please tell me she's ok.
Ethan: Thank you. It's nice.
Nurse: What's wrong with you, honey? Today's a happy day. You get to take your baby home.
Theresa: She's overwhelmed. She's very grateful to you and to everyone here at the hospital.
Nurse: Just wait till you get your boy home. He'll put a smile on your face.
Theresa: Thank you, nurse, but we're going to take her home now.
Nurse: Bye-bye. Good luck. And kiss your sweet baby for me.
Chad: No, I can't wait. I need that information now to avert a crisis. Well, yeah, I realize the information's sensitive. That's why I'm paying big bucks for it. Just get it for me, ok? Look, take care of that for me. I'll call you back when I get to the office. All right? Good. Look at that. Is that for the baby?
Ethan: Yeah, that's -- that was a mistake. The nurse didn't hear about the adoption. Chad, I'm going to take Theresa and Whitney to the Bennett's house. I'll see you at the office, all right?
Chad: Oh, Whitney, I think you forgot something. Oops, I forgot -- you're leaving your baby here.
Theresa: Don't be cruel, Chad.
Chad: Cruel? No, I'm not the one being cruel. Whitney, you are making the biggest mistake of your life.
Fox: So, what in the hell does a French security guard do for fun so far away from home? Do you have nude sniper practice or do you strip-search the locals?
Guard: You are bad.
Fox: You see? Those are those champagne giggles I was talking about.
Gwen: I can't believe you.
Fox: She's cute, but she never knows how to have a good time. Care for a refill, mon capitaine?
Guard: It's Monique. Non, merci. I should not have had the first one. I'm on duty.
Fox: Well, it's your loss. Come on now, Gwen, are you sure? It's fun.
Gwen: Boy, do you put on a good show. You know, I actually thought that you really loved Whitney and you couldn't wait for her to have your baby, you couldn't wait to be a father. But, no, you don't care about them. You only care about sitting there and making goo-goo eyes at this security guard.
Fox: "Making goo-goo eyes"? Get off it, Gwen. Are you serious? What, are we in the third grade here? You know what they say -- "if you can't be with the one you love, love the one you're with." There's an idea. I think I came up with something here. Monique, let me ask you a question. Do you have any friends, male guards on this island, that might be interested in Gwen? Look at her. She's cute, right? What do you feel like tonight, Gwen, Italian, German, French? It doesn't matter. The guards around here are like a regular united nations.
Gwen: You make me sick.
Fox: No sense of humor, that girl. Now, where were we?
Katherine: Can't you at least turn the lights off?
Alistair: Why? I want to see what I paid for -- all of it.
Katherine: Oh, god. Oh, my god!
Alistair: Just the way I like you -- helpless. Absolutely helpless.
Katherine: Oh, god, Alistair, don't do this! Alistair, please!
Katherine: Don't do this!
Gwen: Oh, god. Katherine!
Gwen: Katherine, it's Gwen! Let me in! Katherine!
Guard: Move on now.
Katherine: No! Alistair, no!
Whitney: Oh, my god. Who -- who did this?
Theresa: Three guesses. It's beautiful.
Ethan: Looks like Fox spent a lot of bucks, huh?
Theresa: There’s a card.
Whitney: It's from Fox.
Fox's voice: "Dear Whitney, I love you, I love you, I love you. I'm sorry I had to leave when I did, but it was important. You know how important. I swore to you I'd be back before the baby's born, but I know sometimes babies get impatient and decide to make their big entrance at a moment's notice. So just in case, I arranged to have our room baby-fied whenever you check in at the hospital. So if you're reading this, I guess I'm still gone. I hope you and Fox or Whitney Jr. likes it. I can't wait to kiss you and meet our gift from the stork. And let's just pray he or she takes after you. Much, much, much love, your sly Fox."
Whitney: Oh, my god. What am I going to do?
Theresa: He's going to be devastated.
Whitney: I know. I know. Fox is going to be devastated when he comes home and finds out I've given the baby away.
Fox: My goodness. Is it always this hot in April?
Monique: I don't know. It's my first year. If you are hot, you should undo the buttons on your shirt.
Fox: Way ahead of you. Oh, this is going to be nice. Yes, much better. Say, Monique, maybe you should join me, because I'm guessing maybe you look better with your uniform off.
Monique: You'll get me in trouble talking that way, huh?
Fox: No, seriously, listen, picture this -- you half naked in your beret, right, maybe, I don't know, a couple of ammo belts strung across your chest. You'd have that whole "up the revolution," you know, Chez Guevara thing going on?
Monique: You, monsieur, are a bad influence. Don't get me fired for fraternizing with a prisoner.
Fox: Fired? Who's getting fired? You're not going to get fired. Look, Alistair is my grandfather, ok? He's going to look the other way. Worst-case scenario, he's going to come in here and paddle me. Unless, of course, you'd rather do the honors first.
Monique: I've heard all the stories about Americans as lovers.
Monique: But you do know how to make me laugh.
Fox: Ouch. Seriously, come on, I promise, you won't get in trouble.
Fox: Don't -- Monique, I cross my heart.
Monique: It is terribly hot in here.
Fox: Well, what did I just say? Come here, let me help you.
Guard: Are you deaf? Move away.
Gwen: I am not going to move away. He is hurting her and she needs help!
Guard: Back away now!
Gwen: No! Katherine!
Alistair: What the hell? Oh, it's you.
Guard: I'm sorry, Mr. Crane.
Alistair: You have a job to do. Either do it or get out.
Gwen: Is Katherine ok? I heard her cry out.
Alistair: It's none of your damn business.
Katherine: Gwen, I'm all right. Go. There's nothing to worry about.
Gwen: Well, you don't sound all right.
Katherine: Gwen, please, please go away. Leave me and Alistair alone.
Alistair: Unless, of course, you would like to join us.
Gwen: Don't you dare hurt her.
Alistair: You're in no position to make threats, Gwen.
Katherine: Please, Gwen, go.
Alistair: You heard her. Either go or I'll have to hurt you again.
Luis: Sheridan? Sheridan, come on, wake up, sweetheart.
Beth: Gee, I hope she's all right.
Luis: She has to be all right. I love her. Beth, go to the kitchen and get a wet cloth.
Beth: Oh, of course.
Luis: Sheridan, come on, honey, wake up. Hey, Marty's in the next room. He's going to wake up soon and he's going to need you. Sheridan, come back to me. Please come back.
Fox: Come on, come on, come on. Last one in's a rotten egg.
Monique: What was that about a rotten egg?
Fox: Oh, it's just a little American for you to remember. Come on in, the water's great.
Monique: I can't leave my post, Monsieur, which is guarding you.
Fox: Right. Well, I think you'd do a bang-up job of guarding me if you were in here right next to me.
Monique: I think not.
Fox: But -- help. Help, I'm drowning! Aiuto, aiut-- wait, that's Italian. What's French for "help me"?
Monique: Au secours.
Fox: Au secours, au secours! Help, help, please! Look at me.
Monique: Not very convincing, huh? You can stand up there.
Fox: Oh, but look at me, I'm drowning. Really, I need a beautiful guard to come in and rescue me. There you go. Thank you. You know what's needed right now? A little mouth-to-mouth resuscitation.
Chad: This is Chad. Hey, do you have the information I need? Oh, great. Hold on a sec. All right, spell that for me? Uh-huh? Ok, great. Thank you very, very much. The check's in the mail. Uh-huh. All right. Come on, come on. All right. How do I stop this deal from closing?
Whitney: I know I did the right thing. Yeah. I know giving my baby to another family was the right thing. They're going to love him and appreciate him.
Ethan: Whitney, look at all this stuff. How can you think Fox would desert you after he did all this? It's pretty obvious, he loves you.
Whitney: Look, I'll think of something, ok?
Theresa: I don't know what. He wanted to marry you, Whitney, and you didn't want that. He wants to raise this baby with you.
Ethan: You are going to break his heart when he finds out that you used his power of attorney to give up his child. But it's not too late. You know, you could put a call in to the adoption agency and just put an end to all this.
Whitney: No, you don't understand. Look, can the both of you stop badgering me, please?
Theresa: I'm sorry, ok? We're both sorry. We know you've been through a lot.
Theresa: Ethan, maybe you could -- if you don't mind, could you take some of this stuff away? She doesn't need these reminders, you know?
Ethan: Ok. I'll drop some of it off at the children's shelter on my way back from the office, ok?
Theresa: Thank you. Thank you, you know, for everything and for bringing Whitney home.
Ethan: It's ok. I just -- I don't understand what she's doing.
Theresa: Me, neither.
Ethan: Are you ok?
Theresa: Yeah. I mean, I'm ok as I'll be until they find Jane, but --
Ethan: Well, that's going to happen soon. I promise you that. It'll happen.
Theresa: Well, I pray you're right. But you know what, I'm going to stay here and I'm going to help Whitney because, you know, it helps me.
Ethan: I know. I'll see you later.
Theresa: Can I get you anything? You want some tea?
Whitney: No. No, thank you.
Theresa: You ok?
Whitney: A little sore, I guess, but I'm all right.
Theresa: You know, you could take one of those painkillers that your mom gave you, and I could run you a hot bath and then I could tuck you into bed.
Whitney: No, no, no honey, that's ok. I think I'm just going to try to sleep and try to forget that I gave away my baby.
Beth: How is the poor dear?
Luis: She's breathing and her heartbeat's strong.
Beth's voice: Just my luck.
Luis: I should call 911.
Beth: Oh, no. I'm sure she'll be fine.
Luis: You never know with head injuries. They taught me at the academy that there are weak spots on the skull where just one blow can be fatal.
Beth: Where? I mean, it's just good that's not where she hit her head.
Luis: You shouldn't have pushed her, Beth.
Beth: Pushed her? I -- I was fighting her off. I mean, she attacked me. I was terrified.
Luis: You know, I'm sure that you were upset when you heard that Marty had gone missing, but you didn't have to rush over here and try and take him away. You had to have known that would upset Sheridan.
Beth: Upset Sheridan? What about me? Marty's my son. I was frantic with worry about him.
Luis: Well, I'm sure that you were, but you didn't need to attack her.
Beth: She attacked me. She kept saying that Marty's her son.
Luis: Well, if you had just talked to her and tried to be more understanding of the situation --
Beth: You're trying to blame this on me?
Luis: No, I'm just saying --
Beth: No, you -- you told me you were afraid that Sheridan might lose her mind if she didn't have a child to take care of. So out of the goodness of my heart, I let you take Marty so Sheridan could spend a couple days with him, and what thanks do I get? She attacks me, and now you attack me.
Luis: Beth? Beth, I'm sorry, ok? I didn't mean to get angry with you.
Beth: All I wanted was to protect my son -- our son. I did what any good mother would do.
Luis: Well, I know, and you know what, you are a good mother, but please would you look at her? She is in such a fragile mental state right now.
Beth's voice: A good conk on the head will do that.
Beth: I know. She's been so depressed since she lost her baby. You know, there was a time, well, I feared she might take her own life.
Luis: Do not say that.
Beth: Well, it happens.
Luis: Well -- Beth: That's the main reason I wanted to let you take Marty. I thought it might help save Sheridan's life.
Luis: That was very kind of you.
Beth: But now, well, things have changed. Her mental state has obviously deteriorated. She's irrational. I mean, she's downright delusional.
Beth: Yeah. She's back to thinking that Marty is her child. She's lost it again. Look, as much as I care about Sheridan, I'm a mother, you know, and I have to watch out for Marty first. That's why I can't let him stay here anymore. She's not stable. I got to take Marty home now.
Luis: She's waking up. Sheridan? Hey.
Fox: Well, I tell you what, you can play lifeguard anytime you want.
Monique: I'd like that.
Fox: Do you need help drying off?
Monique: I'm a big girl.
Fox: Ok, well, you know, I'd really like to dry off your back, though, at least.
Monique: Oh. Merci, Monsieur.
Fox: You're welcome.
Monique: Oh, that feels marvelous. But I must go. I don't want Monsieur Crane to catch me out of uniform.
Fox: Right. Right. Well, listen, maybe you can save me again later? Whoa, whoa, whoa. Where you going so fast? Get over here.
Alistair: Was it the way you remember it, Katherine, huh?
Katherine: It's just the way I remembered it, Alistair. Are you done with me? I'd like a drink.
Alistair: Oh, yeah. Well, yeah, of course, dear, sure. Get me one, too. Make it a double.
Katherine: Whatever you say, Alistair.
Alistair: That's it, Katherine, whatever I say, whatever I want for the rest of your life. Now, get me the drink.
Monique: I really must go. But let's meet later.
Fox: Ok, yeah, yeah. Maybe tonight? I don't know, down on your rifle range?
Monique: You are a bad, bad man.
Fox: Sorry to disappoint you, honey, but I'm out of here. If I stole the right key, I can rescue my grandmother, Gwen, and the baby and get the hell out of dodge. Before you know it, Theresa will be hugging her baby and I'll be hugging Whitney and my newborn son.
Theresa: Whitney doesn't need reminders of the baby. It's bad enough when she wakes up and remembers that she's given her own child up for adoption. How did you do it, Whitney, even if it is Chad's baby?
Fox: I made it. Oh, Whitney, I'm so sorry you had to give birth alone. But I'm back. I'm ready to meet my son. Where is he?
Fox: Whitney, where's the baby?
Whitney: The baby --
Fox: Yeah, yeah, our baby. My son. Where's my son? I want to meet him.
Whitney: He's gone, Fox. I gave him up.
Fox: What do you mean, you gave him up?
Whitney: He was adopted.
Fox: You let our son be adopted? You threw away our baby like a piece of trash? You're a monster! A monster! A monster!
Whitney: Oh, my god. I'm sorry. I'm sorry!
Theresa: Whitney, come here.
Whitney: I'm sorry, honey.
Chad: I need that phone number and address.
Ethan: What are you doing? What, are you hiding something?
Chad: Don't be ridiculous.
Ethan: Then let me see it.
Chad: Look, it's just a deal I'm working on, all right? It's no concern of yours.
Ethan: Chad, I'm chief counsel. If it has anything to do with Crane Industries, believe me, it's my concern. We're all on the same team here. Now, what are you hiding?
Sheridan: Oh, Luis --
Luis: Ok. You're ok. You had me so worried.
Sheridan: No! Oh, my -- the clown. It was the clown.
Theresa: Ok. What is it?
Whitney: Well, I dreamed that Fox came home, and, of course, he wanted to know where the baby was, and when I told him, god, he was so furious with me. I don't know what I'm going to do.
Theresa: I'll help you tell him when he gets back, Whitney. It's not going to be easy.
Whitney: I know. I know, I know, I've made a real mess of everything. I mean, Fox is going to go crazy when he hears that I used his power of attorney to give away the baby. And then god only knows what Chad is going to do if he finds out that he's really the father of my child. He would go completely insane.
Chad: Look, just back off, ok, Ethan?
Ethan: No, Chad, not until you tell me what you're working on.
Chad: Like I told you, it has nothing to do with Crane business. It's personal, all right?
Ethan: Ok. Hey, don't get upset, all right? Is it anything I can help you with?
Chad: No. Look, it's private, something I need to handle myself.
Ethan: All right. Look, if you're in trouble, you know, I can --
Chad: No. Look, I'm not in trouble, all right, so don't worry. Everybody will know everything soon enough.
Ethan: Ethan. Really? Thanks, I'm -- I'm on my way. Thank you.
Chad: What was that all about?
Ethan: Oh, that's private, something I got to do myself.
Chad: It was Fox, wasn't it? You found him? Well, you know what, good luck getting him to change Whitney's mind. You know, Whitney's right about one thing -- he doesn't care about that baby, either. You know, he's still a baby himself.
Ethan: All right, Chad, look, he still deserves to know he has a son while there's a still a chance he can stop the adoption. I got to go.
Chad: Ok, ok, ok. Come on, come on. I need to locate my target before Ethan finds Fox.
Fox: Hope I snatched the right key. Come to Papa. Yes.
Monique: Sadly, monsieur, no.
Fox: Right. I was just going to go out for some ice cream, and wondering if you and Gigantor here like cups or cones.
Alistair: Save your breath, Foxworth. Oh, and all this time, I thought you had changed. I mean, everything that you would ever need to lead a sybaritic lifestyle is right here at your disposal. And what do you do to pay me back for my generosity? You steal Monique’s key.
Fox: I was just taking after you, of course, you know, stealing anything that isn't nailed down. You turned me in? Monique, you turned me in? You've broken my heart. After all we meant to each other?
Alistair: Oh, don't blame Monique. Her loyalty is to the Crane that matters.
Fox: Wow. Fine, you know what, you got me. Here's the key. Take it back. No harm done, right?
Alistair: Wrong. I knew you were up to something when you said to me you didn't care about Whitney or your bastard child anymore. And you've been goo-goo over that girl for months now. I had hoped that you had gotten rid of your childish attachments, but apparently not. So I guess I won't be able to trust you now. Take him.
Fox: Easy, Monique, you're so rough. What's the matter, Grandpa, can't you take a joke?
Alistair: It's not a joking matter to me, and it certainly won't be a joking matter to you. Take him away, lock him up, and throw away the key.
Gwen: Oh, my sweet Ashley. Honey, your mommy wishes she could just wave a magic wand and make everything better. But, baby, I can't. I mean, we're prisoners here, and your Uncle Fox turned out to be a jerk. I can't even help poor Katherine.
Katherine: What about poor me?
Gwen: Oh, my god. Are you ok?
Katherine: I'm fine. I was married to Alistair for years. I know how to handle him.
Gwen: I don't know how you do that. You hate him. He has caused you and your family nothing but pain for years. I don't know how -- I do not know how you let him make love to you.
Katherine: It was sex, Gwen. There's a difference. I closed my eyes and I thought of all the good I hoped I was doing by being in Alistair's bed, that maybe, just maybe he would leave Sheridan alone and give her a chance at some happiness with Luis. And, Gwen, it was only my body. He can't touch my soul.
Gwen: I don't think I would have the courage.
Katherine: Oh, yes, you would. Yes, you would. If you truly love that baby, you will stop at nothing, no matter the cost to yourself.
Gwen: Well, I do love her. But I brought her here. I brought her straight to hell. And I'm keeping you away from your daddy, who loves you so much.
Katherine: You are denying that baby its father. Can you live with that the rest of your life?
Sheridan: Oh, the clown. I remember the clown.
Beth: She -- she's obviously disoriented!
Luis: All right, shh. Obviously, you've had quite a knock on the head, but you're going to be all right, ok?
Sheridan: No, no, I am not all right. I remembered.
Luis: Remember what?
Sheridan: The clown. It was the clown that took my baby. I know. I know now.
On the Next Passions:
Theresa: Ethan, I'm not leaving, ok? If you're going to rescue our daughter, I'm coming with you.
Whitney: I put him up for adoption.
Kay: Why on earth would you do that?
Ivy: You are not going out of this house dressed like that.
Jessica: Who's going to stop me?
Sheridan: Luis, it was Beth! She kidnapped me and took my baby.
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