Passions Transcript Monday 9/20/04

Passions Transcript Monday 9/20/04

by Eric
proofread by Laurie

Fox: I've always liked you, Chad. That's why it was so difficult to be in love with Whitney while the two of you were together. Now you're not, and you never will be again, since it turns out you're not only my half brother, but hers, as well. Who knew that the things between the three of us could get even more complicated than they already were? And how dare my father give you that corner office, the one I've been working my tail off to earn. Just because he didn't know who you were, all of a sudden, you've become the second coming. Well, don't get too used to the perks, bro. You and little Ethan came late to the game. I'm the Crane son who's paid his dues. I'm the one who's owed.

[Julian returns to Fox's office.]

Julian: Sorry, I had to take that call. We're still on the same page about Chad, right? You'll talk to him about forgiving me for not being there for him all these years?

Fox: Yes, of course.

Julian: Wonderful. I think that once he understands how much I really want to make it up to him, he'll come around, he'll join the Cranes, take advantage of all the privileges the name can offer. Let me know how it goes. I'll be waiting to hear.   [Julian leaves.]

Fox: In all the years I've been your son, I've never seen you as excited as you are now about Chad. Yeah, I'll talk to Chad, dad. Don't expect me to tell him what you want me to.

*************

Liz: What is it, honey? What could possibly be worse than learning that Chad's your half brother?

Whitney's inner voice: Oh, my god. I'm pregnant. What am I going to do? [To Liz.]   I -- god, I can't even say it.

Liz: Yes, yes, you can. You can tell me, honey. Whatever it is, you'll feel better just getting it out.

*************

Ethan: Will you please just admit it? Admit it, ok? You disguised yourself as Gwen so you could sleep with me. What did you do? What, did you buy a blond wig? Did you steal some of Gwen's perfume here to dab on it or what?

Theresa: Think what you want, Ethan.

Ethan: It's the last thing I want to think, Theresa, but unfortunately, I think it's the truth. What I don't understand is why you did it. I mean, you already switched places with our surrogate so you could carry our embryo and wreak havoc on our lives. Why would you get pregnant twice with two babies?

Theresa: I don't know what you want from me.

Ethan: I want the truth, Theresa, damn it. For once in your life, just the simple, unvarnished truth. Admit that you disguised yourself as Gwen and tricked me into sleeping with you.

*************

[Luis finds an unconscious Sheridan in the church where they had their commitment ceremony.]

Luis: No, Sheridan. Sheridan, please. Sheridan, come on, not now, not after we're finally back together.

Katherine: Luis, did you find --

[Paloma gasps]

Katherine: No.

[Alistair laughs as he watches the events in the church on camera.]

Alistair: God's got nothing to do with it. I'm in control here, not him. I warned you, Luis, just as I warned Katherine and Martin -- nobody goes to war with me and wins. Nobody!

Paloma: They were so happy a couple of hours ago. They vowed to love each other forever.

Katherine: Sheridan, my beautiful daughter. My daughter's dead.

Martin: I'll kill Alistair. I'll kill him for taking Antonio and Sheridan from us.

Luis: Sheridan, I love you. I'll love you for all of eternity.

[Sheridan moans]

Luis: Sheridan? Sheridan! Oh, my god, thank god!

Sheridan: Luis.

Katherine: Oh, god! Thank god! Oh, thank you, thank you.

Paloma: She's all right, tio. She's all right!

Sheridan: What -- what happened?

Luis: Sheridan, I thought you were dead.

Sheridan: No, I must have fallen asleep. I don't remember being that tired. Oh, I don't remember climbing up here.

Martin: But you were by yourself. I mean, nobody took you from the Inn?

Sheridan: No, no. I just went for a walk. I wanted to see the church one last time where Luis and I committed our lives. I'm so sorry I scared you.

Luis: No, no, no, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter now. All that matters is that you're ok.

Sheridan: My poor Luis --

*************

Man: I still don't get it, Mr. Crane. Why'd you have me slip a mickey in your daughter's coffee and then, when she got woozy, put her on that weird altar thing with all of those candles? I could have just taken her out with one shot.

Alistair: And missed the perfect opportunity to send my message to Luis, Martin, and Katherine? Now they know what will happen if they follow through with their plan to return to Harmony -- death and tragedy, for all, one at a time.

*************

Paloma: I was so afraid, but now we can go to Harmony as we planned, and nothing bad will happen to us there.

Martin: No, honey.

*************

Ethan: I know it was you. I know it was you.

Theresa: It must be wishful thinking on your part, Ethan, because deep down inside, you know you should be with me instead of Gwen.

Ethan: That is not true. I love my wife. I can't believe you would do this, that you would trick me into sleeping with you. I just wish I knew why.

[Flashback.]

Theresa: My baby! Oh, I lost my baby!

[End flashback.]

Theresa:  Do us both a favor and just let it go!

Ethan: Let it go? Are you crazy? One of those babies you have inside you is mine and yours Theresa. I think I have to tell Gwen before you go into labor.

Theresa: You're the one who's crazy if you think telling Gwen is a good idea. How are you going to do it? What are you going to say? "Oh, by the way, honey, there was this one night we were making love. Oh, and at the time, I thought it was the best lovemaking we ever had, only I wasn't making love to you. It was Theresa." So when you're telling Gwen the truth, make sure you don't leave out all that.

*************

Chad: What's up, bro? You know, I used to call you bro because we were friends, but now it's the real deal. Kind of weird, right?

Fox: I know. It's going to take a little time getting used to.

Chad: Yeah. Look, man, I don't mean to be rude or anything, but I'm not really in a good mood.

Fox: Yeah, who can blame you? Finding out that the parents you've been looking for your whole life are none other than my father and Whitney's mother.

Chad: Yeah, I don't want to talk about it.

Fox: You know, even if you buy that whole line about them not knowing who you were all those years, the whole mess still begins and ends with them. Intentionally or not, they've made a shambles of your life.

Chad: You know, I don't know what to think about anything anymore.

Fox: I wouldn't, either. My old man -- our old man -- was a lousy father to me, too, growing up, but at least I knew who he was, what to expect. You, on the other hand -- everything you've ever known and believed in has been turned upside down by him.

Chad: You know, they told me if they knew I was alive they'd have tried to find me years ago.

Fox: Yeah, Julian says a lot of things. I've learned to take most of what he says with a grain of salt. Of course, you may feel like you can trust him.

Chad: The hell I will. You know, I don't even want to be in the same room with that guy ever again.

*************

Liz: What is it, honey? Tell me, so I can help you.

Whitney: But see, that's the thing -- you're not going to be able to help me. No one can help me.

Liz: You're not sick, are you?

Whitney: No, no. Um -- I'm --

Liz: What s it?

Whitney: Oh, I'm just upset, you know, that Chad's my half brother. Yeah.

Liz: I guess I got the impression that there was something else wrong.

Whitney: I mean, well, isn't that enough? The fact that my mother has a son with Julian Crane and he's my brother -- that's -- that's not enough? Um -- I don't mean to be rude, Liz, but I kind of want to be by myself right now, if that's ok.

Liz: Yeah, if you're sure.

Whitney: Mm-hmm.

Liz: You know, if -- if I can do anything, just let me know.

Whitney: There isn't anything you can do, but thanks anyway. [Liz leaves.]  What am I going to do? What am I going to do about this baby growing inside me, this baby that's a part of me and a part of my brother?

*************

Fox: You ask me, I think we're talking big-time guilt here. Julian's trying to make up for a lifetime of doing you wrong by trying to buy your forgiveness.

Chad: Well, sorry, I'm not for sale.

Fox: That is exactly what I told him when he begged me to come down here to talk to you. He wants me to get you to see things his way.

Chad: Oh, he sent you here to win me over?

Fox: Absolutely. He wants me to plead his case for him. I guess he's too afraid to come down and do it himself.

Chad: Yeah. So what did he tell you to say?

Fox: Oh, you know, the usual from a Crane -- that he'd give you x number of dollars and god knows how many corporate perks if you'd forgive the unforgivable. I told him that was just another insult, but he wouldn't let up.

Chad: Wow.

Fox: Why would a guy like you condescend to take anything from a man like him, as if a piece of the Crane empire would make everything forgiven and forgotten? You've got more integrity in your little finger than he's ever had, case closed.

Chad: Just hold up a sec, Fox.

Fox: What are you talking about?

Chad: Well, it's not that simple. I mean, there are a lot of benefits from being part of the Crane empire, from what I can see.

Fox: You got to be kidding me.

Chad: Uh-uh. No, I'm as serious as a heart attack.

*************

Julian: Fox, what's taking so long? You should have talked to Chad by now. Whitney. Would Whitney possibly talk to me about Chad?   [Calls Whitney at the Russell house.]

[Phone rings]

Liz: Russell residence.

Julian: Who's this?

Liz: Excuse me, but who's this?

Julian: It's Julian. It certainly didn't take you long to start acting like the mistress of the house, did it, Liz?

Liz: What do you want, Julian?

Julian: I want to speak to Whitney.

Liz: Well, she doesn't want to speak to you. Haven't you caused her enough trouble already?

*************

Whitney: Ok, ok, let's try to be rational here, try to figure this whole thing out. I can't be the first person something like this has happened to. Let's just see. "Babies born to a mother and father who are closely related such as first cousins or brother and sister." I can't even believe I'm reading something like this. "Although children of incestuous relationships aren't necessarily prone to any particular problem --" ok, that's good. "There is, however, a greater likelihood that they'll develop any of many problems affecting children of nonincestuous relationships. While it is rare for a mother to give birth to a baby with Tay-Sachs disease or sickle-cell anemia, the incidence of such illness is much higher among children born to closely related adults. Other risks include premature birth, low birth weight, stillbirth, anemia, heart weakness, even mental retardation." Oh, my god. I can't let you suffer this way. I can't have this baby. I can't. I can't.

*************

Sheridan: I'm so sorry I scared you all.

Paloma: You were so still. I cannot believe you were just sleeping.

Sheridan: I know. I mean, I hardly ever sleep that deeply, especially in strange places. I really don't remember climbing up here.

Luis: Well, I know how you got up there. You were drugged.

Martin: What are you saying?

Luis: Well, it's the only thing that makes any sense. You know, it's just Sheridan's father's way of sending a little warning.

Katherine: Alistair. Yeah.

Martin: You know what? Luis is right. Alistair didn't succeed in killing any of us in the jungle, so he's trying a new strategy.

Sheridan: What does it mean?

Luis: Well, it's obvious that he found out we're planning on heading back to Harmony, and he's just trying to change our minds.

Paloma: I don't understand. Sheridan's father wants to kill all of us?

Katherine: Of course not. No, sweetheart.

Luis: Honey, he doesn't want to hurt you or the Wheelers. He's just after me and Sheridan, and this is his sick way of sending a little message.

Paloma: What are you going to do?

Luis: Well, we're going to do what we were planning on doing. We're going to head back to Harmony, and I'm going to take care of that cold-blooded killer once and for all.

Martin: I'm with you all the way, Luis.

Luis: Mr. Wheeler, thank you, but there's really no sense in you getting mixed up with someone the likes of Alistair Crane.

Martin: He's hurt the people I care about. I want to rid the world of him as much as you do.

[Alistair watches the group on camera.]

Alistair: Like father, like son -- all talk and no action. Try to get rid of me. You'll both regret it very deeply.

Martin: You know what? If we're going to make our plane, we need to get going.

Luis: All right, we'll meet you back at the Inn.

Martin: Come on, let's go.  [Katherine, Martin, and Paloma head out.]

Sheridan: You know what? Luis, maybe we shouldn't go back to Harmony today. We might be making a terrible mistake. Maybe we should just stay and make our lives here.

Alistair: Stay in Mexico? Yes, go ahead, Sheridan, and keep Luis with you there.

*************

Theresa: Really, Ethan, the way you keep going on about that night you think we slept together, anyone would think that you wanted to remember it.

Ethan: All right, then you admit it. Then you admit tricking me into believing I was making love to Gwen, right?

Theresa: I admit nothing of the sort. You're the one who's obsessed with this particular night that you claim I was in your bed. Do you do that often, fantasize that it's me lying next to you?

Ethan: Theresa, cut it out, ok?

Theresa: Why? You know you don't want me to. I'm still number one in your mind. More importantly, number one in your heart. You still want me, don't you, Ethan? You want me now as much as you ever did.

*************

Fox: You got to be kidding me. Why would a guy like you, a self-made guy with your guts and talent, take anything from the bum who turned his back on you your whole life?

Chad: Well, man, for one thing, I mean, if I were a player at Crane, it'd give me a pretty good shot at doing some things I'd like to do.

Fox: Like what?

Chad: Like helping Whitney out, for one.

Fox: Help Whitney how?

Chad: Ease some of the horror she's going through. I mean, she's so undone about what we learned that she won't even take my phone calls, man, let alone spend 10 minutes in a room with me.

Fox: But how would you being part of the Crane empire change that?

Chad: Well, I can help her get her mind off of what's happened by helping her move on with her life. You know, I still care about her, man.

Fox: Of course you do.

Chad: Yeah. And the more that I think about it, Julian Crane's making me a serious offer to bring me into the Crane fold, and no way am I turning him down.

*************

Whitney: I can't have this baby. I can't. I mean, if I do, I'll be saddling it with all sorts of different health problems. I --

Whitney: Where's that clinic that I went to with Theresa that one time? Ok.

Whitney: Life.  [Dialing the phone.]

Woman: Harmony family planning clinic. May I help you?

*************

Luis: Are you saying that you want to stay here in Mexico?

Sheridan: Yes. Yes, I want to stay. Look, I know that this sounds like it's coming out of nowhere, but we just have so many problems back at home.

Luis: You mean your father?

Sheridan: He wants to kill us, Luis.

Luis: Sheridan, if anyone is going to die, it's going to be him, ok?

Sheridan: See, that's what I'm afraid of. If you kill him --

Luis: Look, don't worry about how I deal with him. Just know that you and I are going to be safe and happy at home in Harmony, ok? We're going to have the life we've always dreamed of. Ok? Now, come on. We don't want to miss our flight, do we?

Alistair: Your love conquers all? What tripe! I conquer all, starting with you, Luis!

*************

Julian: You have a lot of nerve, Liz. I've never met a more hateful person.

Liz: Oh, I doubt that, Julian. You're a Crane, aren't you?

Julian: All I care about is what happens to those kids right now.

Liz: It's a little late for you to be going for father of the year, isn't it? >From what I understand, you never gave a damn about any of your children, so why pretend to care now?

Julian: Believe it or not, I do.

Liz: Too little, too late. You wouldn't know how to be a good father if you spent the rest of your life watching "Mister Rogers."

Julian: Let me speak to Whitney.

Liz: Not on your life. You do that girl a favor and leave her alone. If you don't, I'll tell T.C. you're harassing her, then he'll kill you.

Julian: Maybe I have been a lousy father, but I can change that with Chad.

*************

Fox: I can't believe it. You of all people swallowing his pride for a price. I mean, how can you forgive Julian for abandoning you at birth?

Chad: Man, I'd forgive the devil himself if he gave me a chance to make things up with Whitney.

Fox: Oh, it's your life.

[Knock on door]

Chad: Yeah. Coming.

Man: Chad Harris?

Chad: That's me. What's up?

Man: Delivery from Crane Industries.

Chad: Interesting.

Fox: You're just going to accept that like that?

Chad: Yeah, why not?

Fox: Well, I just can't believe my father's being so transparent.

Chad: Come again?

Fox: I mean, this is exactly what we've been talking about. It's a bribe, a payoff. Obviously, my father thinks he can get one over on you with gifts, the Crane name, whatever's in that envelope. His guilty conscience must be eating him alive.

Chad: Well, if the man wants to buy my love, the least I can do is see how much he's offering, right?

Chad: I don't believe it.

Fox: What?

Chad: Well, it's the deed to this place, your family's recording studio. He's giving it all to me. And he's setting up a record label, naming me as the C.E.O. Well, and check this out. Now, what's that supposed to be?

Fox: That's the view from the corner office at Crane industries. Guess he wants you to have it.

Chad: Unbelievable.

Fox's inner voice: Damn it, Julian. This was all supposed to be mine.

*************

Woman: Harmony family planning clinic. May I help you?

Whitney: Oh -- I'm sorry. I have the wrong number. Oh, my god, what am I doing? But what in God's name am I doing to myself and my baby if I do have him? I mean, what if he's born with all sorts of problems?

[Whitney has a vision of the Madonna.]

Madonna: Calm down, dear.

Whitney: Oh, my god.

Madonna: It's all right. You mustn't panic and make an irrevocable mistake. You were raised in the church. You know how precious all life is. You know what to do.

*************

Gwen: I wonder what's keeping Theresa. I thought she was coming right now.

Pilar: Maybe she was tired and went back to bed.

Gwen: You know, I'll go check on her, just to make sure.

Pilar: Ok. Ay, dios mio, Theresa. Please, I hope you're not with Ethan.

Ethan: No, no, no. No, you're not doing this, Theresa. Uh-uh.

Theresa: I'm not doing this? Ethan, I'm not exactly twisting your arm. This is what they call denial. You want to kiss me as much as I want to kiss you, but you feel guilty, so you're putting all the blame on me. Frankly, I think you're being very hypocritical.

Ethan: And I think -- I think you're playing a very dangerous game right now, not being honest with me.

Theresa: You want to know the truth, Ethan?

Ethan: Yeah.

Theresa: Fine. Here it is. You're right. I did sleep with you that night, and you loved it. You loved every second of it.

Ethan: Oh, my god.

Theresa: And you couldn't get enough. And it was all so easy -- a blond wig, a little bit of Gwen's perfume, and don't tell me you didn't know it was me, because I think you did. You had to have.

Ethan: No, I never would have touched you if --

Theresa: Yes!

Ethan: Oh, that's great. That's Gwen's grandmother's perfume.

Theresa: Never mind that! You're so big on truth-telling today, now it's your turn! You knew it was me you were making love to, didn't you? You knew it while it was happening, and you could have stopped me, you could have brought things to a screeching halt, but you didn't. You were more passionate with me than ever. Why? Because you wanted it to be me, not Gwen. I'm the one you still want.

*************

Chad: Julian is offering me this studio, my own label, and everything I need to get started. I'll basically be in the same league as Russell Simmons.

Fox: Talk about trying to buy you.

Chad: You know what? Never in my wildest dreams did I think I'd have all this, or maybe, if I worked my tail off in 10, 20 years, have some of it, but -- you know what this means?

Fox: Our father's a desperate man?

Chad: I can promote the hell out of Whitney and the C.D. we've been working on. Whitney could be a star in under a year.

Fox: I hate to burst your bubble, man, but I would have a lawyer take a look at those papers. Knowing my father, there's a loophole in there that's keeping him in charge no matter how much control it appears he's giving to you. What Julian giveth, Julian taketh away.

Chad: Yeah, but still, even if I'm running things for a while, I could do a lot for Whitney, more than I could do now. If Julian decides to change his mind and boot me out in a few months, well, I already would have launched her career, and nothing he can do could take that away.

Fox: Maybe so, and even if it's temporary, you'd still be in charge of your own record studio, and you'd have a healthy chunk of the Crane empire and money to stake in your venture. It'd take a bigger man than me to turn that down.

Chad: Well, you don't think I should accept the offer, do you?

Fox: Hell, no! I'd take that offer in a New York minute. I just thought you would have more of a backbone than I do.

*************

Whitney: You're a statue. You can't be talking to me.

Madonna: I just needed to get your attention, dear.

Whitney: Oh, my god. I don't even know what's real or not anymore. I'm so confused.

Madonna: Are you? I don't think so, not really. I think you know exactly what you want to do and exactly what you must do.

Whitney: But the baby I'm carrying -- the father is my half brother. I mean, the medical website I looked at says that it runs a higher risk of so many different defects. I mean, see, right here's a picture of a newborn baby born to a brother and a sister. I mean, they said it had so many strikes against him that it's a miracle that it even survived the first few days.

Madonna: It sounds as if he wanted the baby to live.

Whitney: He? Oh. You mean he. Right. I know what the church teaches. I -- I just don't know if I can be that strong or that brave. I mean, what if it has so many problems that I can't handle it?

Madonna: You won't be alone, dear. As long as you believe, you'll never be alone.

Whitney: I'm sorry. I just don't think I have the courage.

Woman: Harmony family planning clinic. May I help you?

*************

Paloma: Oh, don't cry, tia. I'm going home.

Maria: I know. But I'm going to miss you so much, mija.

Paloma: Don't worry about me. I will be with my mother, Theresa, Luis, Sheridan, maybe even Miguel if he comes home.

Martin: Oh, what, are we invisible? What about us? We'll be there, too.

Paloma: Yes, and I'm so grateful for that. To have you and tia in Harmony will be like having a part of Mexico there with me. I will be outside, tia.

Maria: Ok. Well, Godspeed.

Katherine: Oh.

Maria: Long ago, I ceased thinking of you as guests. You are part of the family now.

Martin: And you, ours. Take care, Maria.

Maria: Yes. You, too.  [Katherine and Martin wander out.]

Katherine: Oh, well --

Martin: You ready?

Katherine: I think I'm as ready as I'm ever going to be.

Martin: I sure hope that Paloma doesn't hate me when she finds out I'm her real father.

Katherine: I think that's going to depend on how Pilar receives the news.

Martin: I know. But, first, we have to get rid of Alistair.

Katherine: You think that Luis is going to let you help him?

Martin: He has no choice. I'm not letting my son go up against Alistair alone. His life is at risk in the first place because of me. No, Luis and I will take care of Alistair together.

Maria: Oh, I hate to see you both go!

Luis: Well, not to worry. We'll be back soon. I already promised Sheridan.

Maria: Well, do not let it take too long. And please be careful, both of you.

Sheridan: Don't worry. We'll be fine.

Luis: Mmm.

Maria: And your mother and the rest of your family --

Luis: Don't you worry about that. No one's ever going to hurt them again.

Maria: I believe you, Luis.

Luis: Ready?

Sheridan: Ready. Thank you.

Luis: We'll see you.

Maria: Bye.

*************

Man: Did you get that, Mr. Crane?

Alistair: Every sentimental, meaningless word. Bad enough Luis, Sheridan, and Paloma are on their way to Harmony. How dare my dead wife return to Harmony with her Irish lover! They don't seem to realize they're making the biggest mistake of their lives, and the last one as well.

*************

Ethan: Look, Theresa, I don't care how you spin this, all right? I know what I have to do now.

Theresa: You're not still thinking you should tell Gwen.

Ethan: I have no choice. She's my wife, right? She deserves to know the truth. I have to tell Gwen.

Gwen: What do you have to tell me, Ethan? I mean, what now?

*************

Julian: Oh, come on, Fox. What's keeping you? Are you getting anywhere with your newfound brother? I just hope you can convince him to accept my offer to become a member of the family. I don't blame him for being wary. So far, being a Crane has brought him nothing but sorrow and shock. I just hope he gives me a chance to make it up to him. I hope he gives me a chance to behave like a real father for once.

*************

Chad: No, Fox, I'm getting a funny vibe from you. I mean, one minute, you trash the idea of me taking the offer. The next, you're telling me if you were me you'd jump on it.

Fox: It's just -- never mind.

Chad: No, no, no, no, no, don't play games with me, bro. What's on your mind?

Fox: What's the difference what I think? We may be half brothers, but we come from two totally different places, especially when it comes to Julian.

Chad: Yeah, and you've known the man longer than me, so what do I do?

Fox: You really want my opinion?

Chad: Absolutely. I mean, your -- our old man is offering me the moon -- everything I ever dreamed of. And if I was running a Crane recording label, I could do incredible things to get Whitney's career off the ground.

Fox: I just don't think she'd ever take a handout from anyone from the Crane family. I mean, you may be going soft on Julian, but I doubt she ever will. She hates his guts.

Chad: No, man, she's still upset. You know, she blames him for her parents' marriage breaking up. She blames him more than she blames her mother for me being her half brother.

Fox: That's what I'm saying. You give her anything with the Crane name on it, you may as well forget ever talking to her again. She will lump you in with the rest of them and hate you as much as she hates them. You really want to help her, you really care about her and want to be a part of her life? I'd steer clear of my father and his bribes. If I were you, I would turn that arrogant jerk down flat, but then again, that's just my opinion. It's entirely up to you.

*************

Liz: Whitney, are you ok? I brought you some tea.

Whitney: Can you hold on for one second, please? Thanks, Aunt Liz, but if you could just leave it outside, I'll get it in a second.

Liz's inner voice: Something's wrong. Whatever it was Whitney wouldn't tell me before is awfully serious, but what could it be?

Woman: Hello. Is anyone there?

Whitney: You don't understand. No one understands.

Whitney: Yes. I'd like to make an appointment, please.

*************

NEXT ON PASSIONS:

Chad: God, who did this, man? Who leaked what happened to me and Whitney to the national press?

Luis: Our love is way too strong for anything to tear us apart.

Beth: Luis and Sheridan don't stand a chance!

Julian: Oh, dear god. Eve!

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