Passions Transcript Thursday 1/22/04
Tabitha: Endora, what mischief did you just set in motion? Huh? Nothing's on fire. Oh, I see. You're helping me keep miguel from hooking up with charity, aren't you? Well, thank you, endora. Oh, you're such a good bad baby. And if your spell succeeds in keeping blondie and the bod from coupling, then our jobs as evildoers, and indeed our lives, will be secure. And if not, we'll end up like vince mcmahon and his xfl league -- extinct. Mind you, it's ok with our side if charity just has sex with a boy. It's only a threat to evil if she makes love to the boy she loves. What? You have charity poised to do the deed? Oh, really?
Tabitha: Oh, endora, you mischievous little matchmaker, you.
Reese: Golly, molly. Talk about being tongue-tied. Where'd that come from?
Charity: Oh, I don't kn,, reese. I'm sorry.
Simone: John said he'd catch up with us later.
Jessica: Reese, what's going on? There a short in the hot tub?
Miguel: Yeah, reese. Looks like you just got the shock of your life.
Reese: I did. Only it wasn't from the hot tub.
Jessica: What, you finally proved one of einstein's theories?
Jessica: You're such a nut, always joking around. Hey, let's go get something to drink. You don't want your hard drive to overheat.
Reese: Yeah. I think I was getting a little hot.
Gwen: Where's dr. Culver?
Ethan: I tried to talk to him. He's busy with other patients. The nurse said he'd be tied up for a while.
Gwen: I can't believe that beth's obstetrician just examined me and I didn't realize it was dr. Culver.
Ethan: Honey, take it easy. You were just hit by a car.
Gwen: Yeah, a car that beth was driving.
Ethan: We don't know that.
Gwen: Well, we're going to knoththat as soon as luis talks to beth and finds out she's a homicidal maniac. I need to talk to dr. Culver. I bet he knows things about beth and her pregnancy that luis would want to know, too.
Beth: Luis, I don't need you to take me to the E.R. I'll just take some aspirin and I'll rest. I'll be better in no time, ok?
Luis: Beth, you were burning up at the house, all right? Hey, I insist my son's mother be seen by a doctor, ok?
Beth: But I'm not that hot now.
Luis: You're right, but I'm not taking any chances, ok? You smell that? Smells like something's burning.
Beth: Ow, it's burning! Precious, turn off the heat and get out from under the bed! Come on, get out right now! That's enough! Ow, I'm burning!
Mrs. Wallace: Ooh, those are the flames of hell, missy, and they're going to consume you. Burn, bethie, burn!
Mrs. Wallace: Burn, bethie, burn!
Mrs. Wallace: Burn, bethie, burn, yeah.
Beth: It's probably just a burn victim in one of the cubicles.
Luis: Let me go find a nurse, check us in, ok?
Beth: Dr. Culver can't still be here. I called him with a fake emergency to get him o of his office and away from gwen, but that was hours ago. I cannot let luis run into him. Luis still thinks that culver is a woman.
Nurse: You're beth wallace, the woman with the fever?
Beth: Yeah, but I don't have one any more.
Nurse: Come this way.
Luis: Go on.
Nurse: Here, sit on the bed. Open. The doctor will be with you shortly. Dr. Culver, thanks again for helping out.
Dr. Culver: I was already here. I just wish I knew what that fake emergency call was all about, you know? Oh, well. Who's next?
Nurse: A child with a possible broken leg in cubicle c and a woman with a high fever in cubicle B.
Dr. Culver: Ok. I will see the child first, then I'll take care of the woman, ok?
Alistair: Damn it, ackland, sheridan's already waking up. You should have injected her with a stronger dose of the drug.
Dr. Ackland: Mr. Crane, the effects are too powerful. It's dangerous to administer too much at once.
Alistair: Give my daughter another injection now.
Dr. Ackland: It's too soon.
Alistair: Then give me the syringe. I'll inject sheridan myself. I told you, I want sheridan unconscious, comatose if necessary. Whatever it takes to stop her involvement with luis lopez fitzgerald.
Dr. Ackland: I understand that, sir, but another injection now could kill her.
Alistair: Well, we'll see, won't we? Unlock the door.
Singer: I would hold the hand of the one who could lead me places and kiss the lips of the one who could sing so sweet and i would fly on the wings of the bird I knew could take me highest breathe in, breathe out you keep me alive you are the fire burning inside of me you are my passion for life
noticed your hair islosing its natural fullness?
Gwen and another thing about beth -- dr. Culver said that he recently had a patient who faked her pregnancy. I mean, how could that not be beth?
Ethan: Honey, stop it. You're getting carried away here.
Gwen: No. Honey, I'm not, ok? There is something suspicious about beth. Earlier at dr. Culver's office, his nurse was just about to unload about beth, and then she had second thoughts. God, I just wish I would have known that was dr. Culver who examined me just now because I would already know the answers that I need.
Ethan: Just be patient, all right? You're going to get to talk to dr. Culver soon, ok?
Gwen: Yeah, you bet I will because I am not going to let this rest until I find out the truth about beth.
Beth: Luis, I'm -- I'm feeling much better. It was just probably a bug, ok? It's not the flu, so let's just go. Then you could spend more time with our baby.
Luis: Beth, we're here, ok? You might as well see the doctor. Ok?
Beth: Just hope we don't have to wait much longer.
Luis: In the meantime, I can go check on sheridan. Hopefully she's doing ok so I won'tavave to worry about her so much. You understand, right?
Beth: Yeah. I'd be a monster not to.
Luis: I'll be back soon. Then I'll take you home, ok?
Dr. Culver: I want the girl in cubicle c taken to x-ray.
Nurse: Yes, dr. Culver.
Dr. Culver: And now for our hothead in cubicle B.
Alistair: Yes, my dear, it is I.
Sheridan: Father, I can't believe you really came to see me.
Alistair: Oh, I love you, sheridan. You are and always will be my precious little girl.
Sheridan: Father, I'm so glad that you're here. I really need your help.
Alistair: That's why I'm here, sheridan -- to help you.
Jessica: Reese, was the water too hot in the hot tub or what because you're acting even weirder than usual.
Reese: I do feel a little strange. I must have gotten overheated, like you said.
Jessica: Well, why don't you go splash some cold water on your face while I grab us something to drink?
Simone: I think I'm going to get john something, too, for later.
Miguel: Charity? You've been quiet. You didn't get overheated being near the hot tub, did you?
Charity: No. Maybe it's just a change of altitude or something.
Miguel: You feel up to talking more about our future? Because I really feel like we were making some progress.
Charity: Maybe later.
Miguel: Charity, wait.
Tabitha: Good news, endora. Kay has made it up to the ski lodge, where I'm sure she will do everything she can to kee miguel from hitting a home run with charity. What? Oh, yes, yes, you're right. This is too important to assume that kay will get the job done. No, we have to give her as much help as we can. So, show mommy what other havoc you could wreak on miss goody two-shoes. Oh, I don't know what you did, but I have a feeling you did something that will stop charity and miguel making love. Come on. Tell me what you've got cooked up for charity.
Reese: Splashing cold water on my face really helped clear my head.
Charity: Hi, reese.
Charity: I've been waiting for you.
Reese: You have? Oh, you wanted to apologize for earlier. It's ok. With all the steam that hot tub puts out, you probably thought you were kissing miguel.
Charity: Speaking of putting out -- I'm not with miguel anymore.
Reese: But, charity, miguel loves you.
Charity: And I love your body. Miguel doesn't come close to measuring up to you, reese.
Reese: Oh, I wouldn't know anything about that.
Charity: Trust me. You're a man of steel and then some.
Reese: Well, I have been working out.
Charity: And now I want you to get sweaty with me.
Reese: Wait -- I'm with jessica. Jessica.
Charity: I know, but can my little cousin do this?
Jessica: Oh, my god.
Singer: You are my passion for life
charity: Now let's go back to the hot tub and get steamy.
Reese: Charity -- you, me? Here, us? Nothing like this has ever happened to me before.
Charity: And I'm just getting started.
Jessica: I can't believe what I'm seeing.
Simone: Me, either. How could this be happening?
Jessica: That's what I want to know. Kay, why are you here? What are you up to?
Simone: Yeah, kay, why aren't you back in harmony taking care of maria?
Kay: Oh. I can't believe my sister and my best friend are treating me like an escaped felon. You said how much fun you guys were having up here, and since miguel's mom's taking care of maria -- I don't know, I just thought I'd come up and join you guys. I never get a chance to go out anymore.
Jessica: Well, you should have called first. The lodge is booked solid. Miguel got the last room.
Kay: That's ok because I'm sharing a room with miguel, anyway.
Kay: What do you mean, what? It's not like we've never seen each other's bodies before. We made love and conceived a child together.
Miguel: Yes, I know --
kay: Besides, we need to save money for maria's sake, and sharing a room will just be more economical.
Reese: Charity, I'm flattered. Amazed, really. But I should be with jessica, my girlfriend.
Charity: Ooh. Was I just kissing reese?
Tabitha: You bet you were, honey. Too bad miguel didn't catch you two in that lip lock. You're going to have to work on your timing, endora. Not that I'm complaining. You're doing a wonderful job. A wickedly wonderful job.
Ethan: Hey, man.
Luis: I was on my way to see sheridan. I just thought I'd stop by to see how you were doing, gwen.
Gwen: I'm fine. What about beth? Did she admit to running me over outside of dr. Culver's office?
Luis: That's the other thing that I wanted to talk to you about. Gwen, there's w way that it could have been beth who hit you.
Gwen: Why not?
Luis: Well, I went by beth's house as I promised, and she was in bed with a fever. She was so sick, there's no way that she could have been out driving, much less tried to run you down.
Ethan: See, there you go. Th wasn't in disguise, she wasn't in someone else's car, and she wasn't the one that tried to kill you. She was at home sick.
Luis: She was until I brought her here to be checked out. I'd never seen anyone with such a high fever.
Gwen: Hohow convenient.
Luis: It's true. I'm telling you, there's no way that it could have been beth who hit you.
Dr. Culver: Sorry to keep you waiting.
Beth's voice: Oh, no, it's culver. My goose is cooked.
Dr. Culver: I understand you're suffering from a high fever, ms. -- Wallace? Beth wallace? My god, it is you.
Beth: Hi, dr. Culver. It's funny, such a small town. You never know who you're going to bump into.
Dr. Culver: Don't play nice with me. My nurse told me how nasty you were to her on the phone earlier today.
Beth: That's because I had a fever, which made me really cranky, even delirious. But I'm feeling much better now, so just tell your nurse I'm really sorry for upsetting her.
Dr. Culver: What are you trying to pull?
Beth: Excuse me?
Dr. Culver: First you come to my office concealing a bag of sugar, claiming to be pregnant. Now you're admitted to the E.R. With a high fever.
Beth: Well, I was feeling bad, but I'm better now.
Dr. Culver: Normal. I knew it.
Beth: Well, I guess I don't need to waste any more of your time. I'll be going, then.
Dr. Culver: Just what kind of game are you and that boyfriend of yours up to? What are you playing, huh?
Dr. Culver: Is this some kind of insurance scam? Is it? Where you try to -- first you try to bilk your carrier out of money for a fake pregnancy, and now it's -- now it's what, dengue fever night? What's next, mad cow disease?
Beth: No. I mean, I'm not out to bilk anyone.
Dr. Culver: You know, the wide-eyed innocent act may let you scam some people, but not me. Maybe you have munchausen syndrome where you fake a series of medical conditions in order to get sympathy from doctors. If that's the case, go see a shrink and get yourself some help. Stop wasting my time when there are people here who actually need to see a doctor. You ought to be ashamed of yourself, even prosecuted for trying to pull off this sick little con game. I don't ever want to see you again. And if I do, I will turn you in to the authorities.
Beth: Well, I've been trying to leave, but you won't let me.
Dr. Culver: Well, I'll have a nurse bring the necessary papers for you to sign yourself out, and then I want you gone for good. Oh, oh, and tell your friend, the one who was so anxious to make an appointment to see me, that if she's up to the same shenanigans you are to forget it. I will not be a sucker for any more foolishness. So help me, I'll sue.
Beth: Ok. That was way too close.
Alistair: Sheridan, you need your rest.
Sheridan: Something's wrong, father. The shot the doctor gave me has made me so weak and tired, it's all I can do to stay awake.
Alistair: Don't fight it, my dear.
Sheridan: I need to get out of here. Help me, father. Please help me
alistair: Relax, sweetheart. I don't want you getting yourself worked up. And as I said, I'm here to help you.
Sheridan: Oh, father. It's times like this, I know you really love me.
Alistair: Of course I love you. What kind of father would I be not to love my own flesh and blood? But at the moment, you're making me most unhappy.
Sheridan: How? Father, why? What have I done? What's wrong?
Alistair: You continue to be involved with luis lopez fitzgerald after I told you to stay away from him.
Sheridan: I love him and he's the man I want to spend my life with. I want to raise our baby boy with him.
Alistair: That was the wrong answer.
Sheridan: Father, what was that? What are you doing to me?
Alistair: It's for the best, sheridan. Father knows best.
Alistair: Stop standing there slack-jawed and lock the door. I don't want sheridan disturbed while she's resting.
Dr. Ackland: By giving her a second dose of that drug so soon after the first, you may well have just killed your daughter.
Alistair: Then my problem will be solved. Sheridan will never see luis again.
Kay: I'll just take my stuff up to miguel's room. Which one is it?
Jessica: Kay, you can stay with me.
Kay: Thanks, jess, but you and me and reese in the same room -- ugh. That would be way too awkward, not to mention creepy.
Jessica: Reese has his own private room.
Kay: No snuggles with your cuddle bear?
Jessica: I'm actually sharing a double with charity and simone, which leaves half my bed for you.
Simone: Problem solved.
Miguel: Jess and simone are right, kay. You know, I can't have you stayininin my room. I don't want charity to get the wrong idea.
Simone: So, kay, we'll show you to our room.
Miguel: I'm going to see if I can go find charity.
Kay: I'll be up later.
Jessica: Give it up, kay. Miguel will never love you, much less sleep with you again.
Kay: No, never.
Tabitha: Lenox residence.
Kay: Hey, tabitha, it's me. Listen, I made it up to the ski lodge, but getting miguel into bed won't be as easy as I hoped. Jessica and simone are determined to keep me from messing with charity and miguel.
Tabitha: Yes, I know, dear. I saw it allion.
Kay: So stop watching and start helping me!
Tabitha: F.Y.I. -- Endora has already been casting spells to confuse charity. I can see that we're going to have to turn the evil up a bit.
Kay: How? Another avalanche? Charity survived the one you tried to kill her with before.
Tabitha: No, I've got a much better idea. Instead of using her life, the time has come for charity to lose her virginity -- tonight!
Ethan: Honey, look, luis is a cop. If he says that beth was at home in bed sick while some lunatic was out there trying to mow you down with a car, then that's the end of it. Beth did not try to kill you tonight.
Gwen: I don't buy it, ethan. Honey, there is something seriously up with that woman. And I had my suspicions about beth before, but now, after talking to dr. Culver, and he said he recently had a woman fake her pregnancy -- I mean, hello. Connect the dots. Ethan, it has to be beth.
Ethan: Gwen, culver said the woman was trying to fake a pregnancy which means she didn't get away with it. Ok? If beth had been caught, we'd have known.
Gwen: No, not necessarily. You know, culver could have been bound by doctor/patient confidentiality.
Ethan: Honey, I think you're reaching, ok? Beth is not out to get you because of your suspicions about her being involved in sheridan's kidnapping. I think you just need to let it go.
Gwen: Fine. I won't say another word.
Gwen: I know that beth is to blame for everything that happened tonight. Somehow, I'm going to prove it.
Beth: I've got to cover all my bases so luis doesn't get suspicious.
Nurse: Ms. Wallace, dr. Culver insists you sign yourself out right away.
Nurse: Dr. Culver. He's adamant you leave.
Beth: Oh. I don't understand. There hasn't been a doctor in here yet.
Nurse: You're kidding.
Beth: No. I've been sitting right here with the thermometer that you gave me.
Nurse: Goodness gracious, your temperature is high. Dr. Culver must've gone into the wrong cubicle and mistook someone else for you.
Beth: Yeah, that's probably what happened.
Nurse: That's odd. You don't feel hot.
Beth: Well, it comes and goes.
Nurse: I'm going to get you some water to keep you hydrated while y w wait to see dr. Culver.
Beth: Oh, no. I can't see dr. Culver again, and I can't let luis see him, either. I've got to get out of here.
Alistair: You should take a tranquilizer, dr. Ackland. You're shaking like a leaf.
Dr. Ackland: What you just did, mr. Crane -- giving your daughter that second injection -- if it doesn't kill her, it could leave her psychotic, comatose, in unspeakableaiain. The effects of that type of abuse are not predictable.
Alistair: Get ahold of yourself, man.
Alistair: Ah, you're too nervous, too weak to be in a position of authority when it comes to matters of life and death. I'll be in touch.
Luis: Alistair. What the hell are you doing here?
Alistair: Luis, I think I should ask the very same question of you. Dr. Ackland tells me you've been denied any visitation with sheridan.
Luis: Yeah? Well, it's going to takeorore than a stupid order to keep me away from sheridan.
Alistair: Hmm. Yes, well, we'll see, won't we?
Luis: Yeah, we'll see, all right. So why don't you tell me what the hell you're up to?
Alistair: Not that I need to explain myself to the likes of you, luis, but in case you need to be reminded, sheridan is my daughter.
Luis: Yeah, like that means a damn thing. You don't love sheridan, and you've never been there for her, either.
Alistair: Au contraire, luis. I've been there for sheridan more than you know. When she was kidnapped and held hostage, I worked tirelessly trying to ensure a successful outcome to her ordeal.
Luis: Yeah, well, you could've fooled me. You've always been against what's best for sheridan's wishes.
Alistair: What I'm against, luis, is you. I don't want my daughter anywhere near you.
Luis: Oh, you're still worried, aren't you? You're still worried that sheridan's going to help me find out what you did to my father.
Alistair: No, luis. Your misguided anger toward me and my family is toxic to her. And contrary to what you believe, I care about sheridan and her best interest and it is in sheridan's best interests to stay married to your brother, antonio. He, luis, is her husband, not you.
Luis: Yeah, well, sheridan loves me and I love her. Antonio knows that.
Alistair: How cavalier you can be when it suits you -- coveting your brother's wife, committing adultery with sheridan while steadfastly refusing to marry beth wallace, the mother of your currently bastard son.
Luis: Sheridan and I -- we will be together. Yeah, it may take some time to work things out. The right thing will happen.
Alistair: Yes, luis. The right thing will happen. I don't doubt that at all.
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kay: Charity lose her virginity? Tabitha, have you lost your mind? You said that when charity makes love to miguel, she'll come into her full powers of goodness, and that means you and endora and those things in the basement will be given the heave-ho back to hell.
Tabitha: True, but the key words here are "make love." Charity will only come into her powers of goodness if she loses her virginity making love to the boy she loves, I.E. Miguel.
Kay: So you mean to tell me that charity could have sex with every guy in canada and she wouldn't come into her powers?
Tabitha: Exactly. Losing her virginity to lust and not love will make charity just another horny teenager.
Y: Ok. So are you having endora bus in guys from canada, or do I have to go across the border to nab them myself?
Tabitha: Neither, dear. I have the perfect young buck to rut with charity.
Kay: Who? Who?
Tabitha: You're sounding like an owl, kay. I'll take care of it, with endora's help -- don't worry. You just keep on trying to make inroads with miguel, all right?
Kay: Ok, but I want to know --
Tabitha: Hear that, my little demon? You have work to do. This time, go for broke, endora. Give it all you've got. Oh.
Reese: Jess? Hey, I thought you wanted to wait until we were --
charity: Jessica can wait. I can'T.
Charity: "Whoa"? No, you stud. It's time to giddyup.
Jessica: Kay, we put your bag in our room.
Simone: We are going to get a snack, and then we're going to head up to bed.
Jessica: We want to hit the slopes first thing in the morning.
Kay: Whatever. I'll be up later.
Simone: Hey, miguel. Were you able to find charity?
Miguel: Thought she might be with you guys.
Jessica: Hmm. We haven't seen her in a while.
Miguel: I'I'm sure I'll catch up with her. You know, kay, it's good that you're staying with the girls in their room.
Kay: Yeah, that's what they keep telling me.
Miguel: No, really. It worked out for the best because reese said I could bunk with him, so that way neither one of us has to spend money on a room.
Miguel: I knew you'd think so. All right. Good night, you guys.
Jessica: Good night.
Kay: Hey, you want to grab a bite to eat or something?
Miguel: No thanks, kay. I'm beat. I'm just going to go up to reese's room and hit the sack.
Kay's voice: I hope whatever tabitha and endora do works.
Reese: I must be dreaming. No girl's ever called me a stud before -- not even jessica, and she's blinded by love.
Charity: Well, I'm not blind, reese. I see you for the hard-bodied stud that you are. Now, do what studs do and have your way with me -- right now.
Reese: Oh, this is like something on the adult movie channel -- or so I hear.
Charity: No, it's not a movie, reese. I'm real, in the flesh.
Reese: Wow. If I'd known I was going to get this kind of response, I'd have started working out years ago.
Charity: I want you, reese. I want you bad.
Reese: Wait, don't you mean "badly"?
Charity: Come on, have your way with me. Go all the way.
Reese: But wait. I'm with jessica, and, charity, you're with my best bud, miguel.
Charity: Uh-uh, I'm not with miguel anymore, and -- and, technically, you're not with jessica, I mean, if you guys haven't done it yet.
Reese: No, even so, what you want to do, it's --
charity: Jessica cannot make you feel the way that I can.
Reese: Uh-oh. Fire down below.
Charity: It's starting to burn, isn't it, reese?
Reese: Uh-huh. Got to put it out.
Reese: Got to put it out.
Charity: Don't bother. I'm going to fan the flames.
Reese: You're what?
Charity: I've seen your body, reese. Now it's time for you to see mine.
Charity: Come and get it, reese. I'm all yours.
Tabitha: Oh, endora, your timing is great. Not only does your spell have charity poised to seduce reese, but miguel is on his way up to the room.
Tabitha: Oh, when true blue miguel finds red hot reese getting it on with charity, there's going to be such an explosion, we'll hear it all the way back here in harmony. Oh, it's going to be great. Not only will charity lose her virginity, she will lose miguel as well. Oh, what a victory it's going to be for our side. Oh.
Beth: I wonder what she's up to. I'll never let you take my baby away from me -- never. Oh! There it is.
Gwen: Oh -- oh, my god!
Beth: I did it! I killed you, gwen. You're dead! You're dead, gwen!
Gwen: Hi, this is gwen winthrop calling. I'd like to make another appointment with dr. Culver. As soon as possible, please. Sure, I'll hold.
Beth: Oh, no. This can't be happening. I tried killing gwen to keep her from meeting dr. Culver. That didn't work. Now, what am I going to do to stop her? Luis can never find out that I faked my pregnancy to steal sheridan's baby.
Dr. Ackland: You're not allowed in there.
Luis: Look, get out of my way, ackland. Ok, you're not going to stop me from seeing her.
Dr. Ackland: Although I guess it doesn't really matter -- it wouldn't matter y you were allowed to see her or not.
Luis: What, are you trying to use reverse psychology on me?
Dr. Ackland: Oh, no, no, no. Just since the last time you were with sheridan, she's decided she doesn't want to see you anymore.
Luis: Oh. Oh, is that right?
Dr. Ackland: Yeah. I'm sorry. Now that she's in treatment, she's had a change of outlook, and she -- she's made it quite clear that she doesn't want to see you anymore. It's -- it's too painful for her. You're a reminder of her unfaithfulness to her husband -- your brother, antonio?
Dr. Ackland: Mm-hmm.
Luis: Well, I don't believe a damn word you're saying, so get the hell out ofy y way.
Dr. Ackland: Yeah.
Luis: All right. Now unlock the damn door.
Dr. Ackland: I don't have the key.
[Knock on door]
Luis sheridan -- sheridan, wake up! Sheridan! She's not moving.
Dr. Ackland: Well, she's sleeping. You should leave her now. She needs her rest.
Luis: Uh-uh. Something's going on here. You and alistair and antonio -- you're trying to keep me from seeing her.
Dr. Ackland: Your suspicions are bordering on paranoia.
Luis: No, you can it. You tell me what's going on here.
Dr. Ackland: I have no idea what you're talking about.
Luis: No, no, no. First you tell me that sheridan doesn't want to see me, and now I find her so drugged up that she doesn't hear me pounding on the door?
Dr. Ackland: I have to insist that you leave now.
Luis: Leave? Hell, I'm not going anywhere. No, I'm not leaving here until I find out that sheridan's ok. Sheridan! Sheridan! Sheridan!
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