Passions Transcript Monday 12/22/03

Passions Transcript Monday 12/22/03--Canada; 12/23/03--USA

by Eric

miguel: Nurse kravitz, what are you doing here?

Nurse kravitz: Well, I came to apologize to ms. Lenox for the way I behaved toward her at the hospital. I know this sounds crazy, but I thought I saw her baby do some pretty strange things in the nursery. I realize now I was just seeing things. I'm sure there's nothing strange about ms. Lenox or her baby.

Santa: What happened?

Elf: Where are we?

Second elf: I was set to do cartwheels for the show's big finale, then -- poof -- we're here, wherever "here" is.

Santa: Oh, no. We're in tabitha lenox's house. She's the one who deliberately overbooked the inn so they would have to stay in the manger. And mrs. Claus says tabitha just had a baby.

Elf: But we love children of all ages.

Santa: Not that kind of a child. It's why we located to the north pole in the first place. Tabitha and her people don't like the cold, and I wanted to put as much distance between us and them as possible. But the fact tt t we're here means that there's trole brewing -- big trouble.

[Tabitha gasps]

Tabitha: Oh, no. They're here. Oh, what else can possibly go wrong? Uh -- on second thought, why don't you kids go back in the living room and I will bring you the eggnog in there.

Kay: No, you can't send them back into the living room. Thanks to endora, santa and two of his elves are in there.

[Tabitha gasps]

John: Tabitha, is everything ok?

Tabitha: Yes, yes, well, what -- what could possibly be wrong?

Tabitha: Oh, no. Things are going from bad to worse. No.

Jessica: Let's just go in the kitchen and we'll all help with the eggnog.

Tabitha: No, no.

Tabitha's voice: If these kids see my relatives pile out of that sarcophagus, they'll strap endora and me to a pile of wood and set fire to it. And christmas is bad enough without being burned alive to boot.

Little ethan: Mommy.

Whitney: Yes, little ethan, that's your mommy. If only you could see her for christmas.

Fox: Ho, ho, ho!

Theresa: Christmas is supposed to be a time of joy and happiness. But this year, so many people have both pain and sadness. I have to pray for a miracle. I couldn't bear the thought of losing little ethan, luis losing his son, or sheridan losing her mind.

Antonio: I really hate having to sign sheridan in to this place.

Eve: But, antonio, you didn't have any choice. Sheridan lost control, thinking that luis and beth's baby was hers. She needed to be restrained for her own good.

Antonio: I know, but --

eve: And now that she's here, she can be evaluated and we can give her the help that shshe needs. I hope the psychiatrist that I called gets here soon. I'd like to consult with him about sheridan.

Doctor: There's no need for a consult, dr. Russell. I looked at mrs. Lopez fitzgerald's chart, and I know exactly what she needs. Sheridan is to remain here in the psych ward permanently.

Sheridan: Please. Someone, help me! Let me out of here! I have to get to my baby!

Mrs. Wallace: That is the saddest baptism I have ever seen.

Beth: I just can't believe this is happening. Our baby's so close to dying. He's so sick.

Luis: Beth, don't give up hope, all right? We just have to hope and pray. Pray for a miracle that our son's going to be ok. Ok.

Mrs. Wallace: You know, beth, you can be that miracle. You can save that baby. Give it back to sheridan. If you don't, that baby's going to die of a broken heart yearning for its mommy. Come on, beth. Come on, do the right thing before it's too late for once in your life.

[Martin cries]

Singer: I would hold the hand of the one who could lead me places and kiss the lips of the one who could sing so sweet and i would fly on the wings of the bird I knew could take me highest breathe in, breathe out you keep me alive you are the fire burning inside of me you are my passion for life re invited to a streaking party.

I gngp

ale howoerana ho mhilst 3

tabitha: Listen, while I'm making the eggnog, why don't you kids go upstairs and look at the new wallpaper in the nursery.

Reese: Do we have to?

Kay: Please? I'll be up in a minute.

Jessica: Ok.

John: Onward and upward.

Tabitha: And, john, don't go through the living room to the foyer. Go -- go up the back stairs. That's the quickest way.

John: If you say so.

Kay: Ok, witch, why did you just kick me?

Tabitha: That's why.

Kay: Tabitha, what's a coffin doing in your kitchen?

Tabitha: It's my relatives' version of an R.V. Oh, thank hades charity isn't here. She'd be on evil overload right now, sensing the group that's about to emerge from it.

[Knock on door]

Miguel: No one's answering. Maybe we should try the kitchen door.

Nurse kravitz: Let'S. I so want to apologize to tabitha for accusing her of being evil.

Charity: There's evil nearby. There's so much evil.

Fox: Merry christmas, little ethan.

Little ethan: Thank you.

Fox: Look at that -- a good little boy with good little manners. Why don't you go ahead and show santa how you can play with your new toys. Go on, hurry over there. There you go. He's a good little kid. Well, thank you very much, but what was that for?

Whitney: All of this -- decorating the library, pretending to be santa for little ethan. At least for a little while, he can forget that he's not with his mother. You know, every time I think that you can't be a better person, you surprise me.

Fox: You know, we're playing boyfriend and girlfriend so that you can spend a little bit more time with little ethan, watch him for theresa. So I was thinking, you know, since we're supposed to be boyfriend and girlfriend, we should probably practice kissing just in case -- I don't know -- maybe somebody might come in here and see us under this. What do you think?

Whitney: Ok. I mean, just in case.

Fox: Just in case.

Whitney: Right. Ok.

Theresa: I would give anything to spend christmas morning with little ethan, see him open up his gifts. You know, maybe woody will be able to get a court order to give me custody of little ethan just for christmas morning.

[Knock on door]

Theresa: Yes?

Man: Theresa lopez fitzgerald?

Theresa: Uh-huh.

Man: I have a delivery for you from crane industries.

Theresa: I don't care what you have. The only thing I want from the cranes is my son back.

Man: That's what I've come to give you.

Antonio: You can't keep sheridan here forever.

Doctor: I misspoke. What I meant to say was your wife will get the best treatment available for as long as she's in my care. But in her current condition, sheridan does need to be here. Once she improves -- if she improves -- then sheridan will be released.

Antonio: I want to see my wife now.

Doctor: I'm sorry, but in my professional opinion, sheridan needs to be isolated from the people in her life who cause her any type of emotion.

Antonio: I am her husband.

Doctor: Exactly.

Eve: Antonio, I know this is hard. But the doctor is a specialist in depression, so I think we'll have to trust he knows what's best. Why don't you go and getome coffee, and then you and I will talk later.

Eve: Dr. Ackland, I noticed that you put sheridan insosolation. Isn't that a little bit extreme?

Dr. Ackland: Are you challenging my diagnosis?

Eve: No. No, of course not. It's just -- well, I've been sheridan's doctor for years. I've even given her hypnotherapy. So you could say I -- I know her inside out. And I just think that sheridan would be better off if she weren't alone.

Dr. Ackland: Well, in deference to your history with my patient, I'll allow sheridan out of her room -- for now, at least.

Eve: Thank you, dr. Ackland. I'll -- I'll go and let her know.

[Phone rings]

Dr. Ackland: Hello? Yes, everything's taken care of. No, no, no. You don't need to come to the hospital. You don't have to worry about sheridan crane, dr. Russell. She'll rot here in this psych ward.

Sheridan: Oh, eve. Thank god. You have to get me out of here. I have to get to my baby. Something is terribly wrong with my child! Please?

Luis: Please, god. Please don't take our baby. Please.

Mrs. Wallace: Don't let this innocent baby die because you're covering up your guilt in stealing him from his mommy in the first place.

Beth: Luis -- I know how we can save the baby.

Luis: How? How, beth? How can we save the baby?

>> Reynold: On next "100 huntley street" make sure you tune in we are going to be having a story about a adoptioN. And we have a couple here that's going through process i believe it will be encouragement to all us. Also we have todd and shrill neilson who are part of god rocks and great children's video. Embeiging on big tour this year. That's on the next "100

little ethan: Come play with me.

Fox: Ho, ho, ho! I thought you'd never ask.

Whitney: You know, I wish theresa could see how happy little ethan is right now.

Fox: Santa's about to make your wish come true. Hohoho, ho! What do we got here? Oh, dump trucks. Santa likes dump trucks. What's this?

Theresa: You have my son in that box?

Man: Oh, of course not. I was told it had something to do with him. It's a computer system from nicholas foxworth crane. I came to deliver and install it.

Theresa: Oh -- yeah. I -- I don't know what a computer has to do with my son, but, please, come in.

Man: Thank you.

Theresa: Thank you.

Luis: How, beth? Beth, how can we save the baby?

Beth: We can -- we can call sh--

[Martin coos]

Beth: We can call on god to help us.

Mrs. Wallace: Damn.

Luis: Right. All right. Well, he -- he does seem to be doing better, doesn't he?

Mrs. Wallace: You have got to tell luis the truth so he can give the baby back to sheridan so she can save his life.

Beth: No. No, my baby's not going to die. He's going to live. And then luis will be tied to me forever.

Eve: Sheridan, dr. Ackland has given me permission to take you out of isolation. But I cannot do that if you're going to get upset about the baby again.

Sheridan: Look -- I'll stay calm. Eve, I promise.

Eve: Ok, then I'm going to let you out.

Sheridan: Oh.

Sheridan: Thank you.

Eve: Now, you have to stay calm becse I cannot help you if you don'T.

Sheridan: Ok.

Eve: Ok. Come on.

Eve: I'm going to go and take care of some paperwork, ok? And then I will come back and check on you.

Man: You're new here.

Sheridan: Yes.

Man: You need to be initiated.

Sheridan: Initiated how?

Man: I'll show you -- in a room that's more private.

Sheridan: No. No.

Sheridan: Let go of me! Oh, god. No!

[Man screams]

Sheridan: Who are you? Why are you helping me?

Norma: Name's norma. And I helped you because I got an ax to grind with men who hit on beautiful gals like us.

Sheridan: How can I ever repay you?

Norma: Well, there is one way.

Sheridan: You don't want to take me into a private room, do you, norman -- I mean, norma?

Norma: Heavens, no. Father wouldn't approve. I just want a little bit of information.

Sheridan: Information?

Norma: Do you know tabitha lenox?

Tabitha: Harry! Oh, harry. Oh, kay, this is my cousin harry.

Harry: Nice to meet you, kay. We've all heard what a selfish, self-serving mortal you are -- getting knocked up just to try to get miguel.

Kay: But I love him.

Boozy: Love? What the [Beep] Is love?

Tabitha: Oh, boozy! Boozy, is it really you?

Boozy: Who the [Beep] Else would it be? I -- I see you got yourself

[Beep] Along with a [Beep] Kid here.

Tabitha: Yes. This is my little endora.

Boozy: Is that right?

Harry: She's a beautiful baby, tabitha.

Tabitha: Oh, thank you, cousin harry. I think she's a beautiful baby, too. There you are.

Harry: But what's this? Are you decorating for christmas nowadays?

Tabitha: No, I am not decorating for christmas. An invasion of brats are responsible for those.

All: Ooh, aah.

Boozy: Way to [Beep] Go, endora.

Tabitha: Maybe things aren't so bad after all.

Charity: So much evil.

Miguel: Charity has premonitions.

Nurse kravitz: Oh, I have flashbacks to the 1960s. I was in a wall with doors, and goldie hawn was there.

Miguel: I think that we should get charity inside so she can rest on tabitha's sofa.

Nurse kravitz: As a highly trained nurse, I'll open the door.

Elf: Where's this tabitha you were talking about gone to?

Nurse kravitz: Yoo-hoo!

Elf: Maybe that's her now.

Man: Here we are, ma'am. You'll be able to see and speak with mr. Crane via the computer hookup.

Theresa: Ok.

Man: Ready?

Theresa: Sweetheart!

Little ethan: Mommy!

>> A global national special, chrimas day. You get to see where the country is headed. Paul martin discloses the challenges facing him... and all other canadians. Global national with kevin newman presents "in conversation with the imime minister".

Singer: You are my passion for life


Boozy: So -- so, tabby, what else can the little

[Beep] Do?

Santa: What the blitzen was that?

Elf: Let's go see.

Second elf: Tabitha's baby could be in danger.

Miguel: I think that explosion came from the kitchen.

Charity: I hope no one's hurt.

Miguel: I'll go see.

Nurse kravitz: No, miguel. You stay here with charity. I'll assess the situation. As a medical professional, it is both my duty and a privilege to help anyone who is burned and/or maimed.

Miguel: Yeah, but the -- the kitchen's this way.

Charity: There's so much evil.

Miguel: Come on, let me get you in the living room.

John: We heard an explosion.

Simone: I heard it, too. What's going on?

Reese: We don't know, but it sounded like it came from the kitchen.

Charity: There's evil in the kitchen.

Tabitha: Endora really is very gifted, isn't she?

Boozy: Yeah --

kay: Look, I know that you're proud of endora, but we've got problems, remember? Jessica, reese, john -- they're upstairs. And santa and two of his elves are just wandering around somewhere.

Santa: We're not wandering anywhere. We're right here.

Elf: Those two lady elves seem different from the lady elves who work at the north pole.

Santa: It reeks of that which draws the young to the dark side.

Elf: Is that why my tights are getting tighter?

Santa: Stop tempting my elves, you ho, ho hos.

Miguel: Kay? Tabitha? Are you guys all right? Charity and I heard something explode.

Tabitha: Curses! Miguel is here with charity.

Tabitha: Oh, no. As if blondie isn't enough. Now I've got nosy rsrse kravitz closing in. Oh, 'twas a nightmare before christmas.

Sheridan: Yeah, I know tabitha lenox. She's a nice lady. A bit odd, but nice. She brought me potpourri once.

Norma: A francophile! Is there no end to tabitha's evil!

Sheridan: Wonder how long they're going to keep me in here for.

Norma: Depends on what you're in for.

Sheridan: I lost my baby.

Norma: My father was taken from me. Daddy -- daddy? Your little norma misses you so much!

[As father] I miss you, too, gumdrop.

Sheridan: I -- I miss my baby, too. I can't help but think that luis and beth's baby is really mine. You know, my -- my head keeps telling me that it's not true, but my heart -- I just feel so connected. And I know that sounds crazy. I guess that's why I'm here. I just wish I knew for how long.

Norma: [Normal voice] I have connections here in la-la land. One of the orderlies thinks my life story might make a great movie. "Psychotic" is the working title. I don't much like it. I mean, how does that relate to me? Your chart -- I'll go find out how long they plan to keep you in here.

Sheridan: Hey, thanks, norma.

Antonio: So, is there any change?

Eve: No, antonio, I'm sorry. Sheridan's -- she's still the same.

Dr. Ackland: Why are you here? I told you I had the situation under control.

Alistair: I know what you said, dr. Ackland. Now know this -- you don't control anything when it comes to my daughter, sheridan.

Ii do.

Beth: His lips are turning blue!

Luis: Oh, my god, is he breathing?

Beth: I don't know!

Luis: Uh-oh. Now he feels cold.

Mrs. Wallace: Dear god. Well, this is it, beth. The baby's going to di and it's all your fault.

little ethan: Look what santa brought me.

Theresa: Ok. Fox? I mean, santa? Thanks -- thank you for, you know, setting up this computer like this so I can -- I can see my son. It's really wonderful. He seems so happy. And, whit, thanks for being over at the mansion to spend time with my son and pretending to be, you know, fox's girlfriend so that rebecca doesn't think that I asked you to spend time with little ethan.

Whitney: Well, fox made going undercover pretty easy, and we're having fun.

Fox: Oh, anything I can do to make sure little ethan has a merry christmas.

Whitney: You know what? I think I'm going to go check in with my dad. Do you mind if I use the phone in the other room?

Fox: No, do it. I'll stay here with little ethan.

Whitney: Ok.

Fox: Ho, ho, ho! Show mommy your new toys. Show mama what santa brought you.

Whitney: Fox, how did you turn out to be such a wonderful man?

Fox: Cool stuff, huh?

Tabitha: Kay, herd charity and company into the living room before they get wind the woo-woo that's going on here. Go on, quick.

Miguel: What was that?

Kay: Oh, hi, guys. Don't bother going into the kitchen. Everything's fine.

Simone: What blew up?

Kay: The eggnog. You know how explosive those rotten eggs can be.

Reese: As a man of science, I'm going to have to disagree.

Kay: Well, then it was the nog that explod.D. I don't know. But tabitha -- she's making a fresh batch, and she just wants us to all go in the living room. So let's go.

Charity: I still feel that evil's close by, miguel.

Kay: Yeah, well, e kitchen's one hell of a mess.

Tabitha: Oh, get a room. Excuse me.

Tabitha: Oh, nurse kravitz. What a pleasant surprise.

Nurse kravitz: I heard an explosion earlier. Is everything all right?

Tabitha: Oh, that. Oh, yes, yes. I was making some eggnog, and I overheated the nutmeg. You know what a volatile spice that is.

Nurse kravitz: No, but --

tabitha: Well, thanks for stopping by.

Nurse kravitz: Oh, wait. I came to apologize for how I acted toward you and endora in the hospital.

Tabitha: Well, apology accepted.

Nurse kravitz: Oh, wait. I brought a gift for endora.

Tabitha: Oh -- how sweet.

Nurse kravitz: Yep.

Tabitha: A sheep.

Nurse kravitz: Uh-huh.

Tabitha: Well, I must run. Thanks.

Nurse kravitz: What -- well, what happened? Where did these sheep come from?

Tabitha: Enodra, undo this spell now. What sheep?

Nurse kravitz: They were just here!

Tabitha: Coming! Toodle-loo, nurse kravitz.

[Door closes]

Nurse kravitz: I know I saw sheep. Why is tabitha pulling the wool over my eyes?

Tabitha: Honestly, endora. You know we both hate christmas. Why on earth did you bring santa and his merry minions into our house?

Santa: Ow!

Tabitha: Santa, stop your sniveling. You and your elves follow me. I am going to get you back into the television. And you are going to reverse your spell, or else I'm going to make you watch "it's a wonderful life" over and over as punishment. Come on, come on.

Nurse kravitz: Tabitha has some 'splaining to do. Nutmeg doesn't explode, and sheep just don't appear then vanish.

[Nurse kravitz gasps]

Nurse kravitz: Oh, my gosh! Oh, a christmas costume party. Oh, how clever. Excuse me, I'm looking for tabitha.

[Harry laughs]

Nurse kravitz: Oh, wait -- I can't just walk through tabitha's house without her permission. I'llo back around to the front door. Oh! Oh! I have all your records.

Boozy: [Beep] You!

Nurse kravitz: Oh. Oh, ok. But you'll have to buy me dinner first.

Miguel: You still sensing evil, charity?

Tabitha: Kay, get everyone outside so endora can get santa and company back inside the television.

Kay: Hey, I think I hear carolers. Let's go outside and see.

John: Ok.

Tabitha: Now, endora, get santa and his elves back in the tv now.

Elf: What if we don't want to go back?

Second elf: Yeah, we kind of liked that elf action.

Nurse kravitz: Miguel!

Miguel: Nurse kravitz. We thought you left.

Nurse kravitz: Oh, I wanted to see tabitha first. The magician she hired for the costume party is amazing. Imagine -- making a flock of sheep appear, then disappear.

John: Magician?

Reese: Sheep?

Jessica: Costume party?

Nurse kravitz: Yeah. What are you all going as?

Reese: Someone's a loony tune.

Nurse kravitz: Oh! I can't wait to see who. Oh, charity, I hope you're feeling better.

Charity: Actually, I'm still sensing evil.

Nurse kravitz: Oh. The party will do you good, then. I say that as a highly trained medical professional.

Nurse kravitz: Tabitha?

Tabitha: Oh, no. Endora, get these wretched christmas characters back inside the tv now, whether they want to go or not.

Nurse kravitz: Tabitha lenox, I'm on to you.

>> Johnny: Me. Is a great port.

>> Pete: That's my point right there.

>> Johnny: A --

seafood sauce as war

>> Dana: Did you write that? Did y and you make fun of any

tabitha: You're on to me, you say?

Nurse kravitz: I know what's been going on around here -- your kitchen full of those far-out characters.

Tabitha: Endora -- endora, wait.

Nurse kravitz: Oh, my gosh! That's even better than the sheep!

Tabitha: What? Excuse me?

Nurse kravitz: Oh, where is the magician you hired for the costume party?

Tabitha: Magician? Party?

Nurse kravitz: My head is still spinning as to how special it is! Whew! Oh, it's really spinning. Ooh.

Jessica: That was a waste.

Simone: I don't know what you heard, kay, but it wasn't carolers.

John: Why did that nurse think tabitha was having a costume party?

Charity: Miguel, there's so much evil.

Kay: You need to get your family out of her so charity will stop with the premonitions and miguel could spend some time with me and maria.

Tabitha: Where's nurse kravitz?

Kay: When we came in, she was heading towards the kitchen.

Tabitha: The kitchen? Oh, my devil, no.

Nurse kravitz: Oh -- where did everybody go.

Boozy: What --


Nurse kravitz: Wow! Oh! You can bet your bippy that's the best magic iver saw!

All: Sock it toe!E! Sock it to me! Sock it to me! Sock it to me! Sock it to me!

Nurse kravitz: What does that mean? "Sock it to me"?

[Harry screams]


[Nurse kravitz screams]

Theresa: Santa, it's so nice of you to do this for me and little ethan.

Fox: Well, I'm glad I could make you happy, but maybe we should think about taking a toy break. You know what I mean? If rebecca catches us with this video hookup, she's liable to rip all the D.S.L. Cable out of the mansion, and you wouldn't be able to see little ethan on the video.

Theresa: I would hate for that to happen. But can -- can I just see little ethan enjoying himself just a few minutes longer, please?

Fox: Yeah, I don't think a few more minutes is going to hurt, right?

Theresa: Right.

Fox: Oh, my god, it's you.

Theresa: Fox? Fox, what's going on? Little ethan? Little ethan!

Antonio: I hate seeing sheridan in this mental ward. Now, are you sure that she's not better off at home?

Eve: Well, dr. Ackland doesn't think so, and he's -- he's an expert in clinical depression.

Antonio: Well, even so, I'm still not convinced that sheridan should be kept here.

Eve: Well, I'm not so sure why dr. Ackland wants sheridan to stay here, either. Something not quite right about him.

Dr. Ackland: I'll keep sheridan here for as long as you want, mr. Crane.

Alistair: Indeed, you will, dr. Ackland. In ordero o protect my family, sheridan must not leave this psychiatric ward until her dying day.

Norma: I saw your chart, dear, and the news isn't good. Dr. Ackland thinks you're a danger to yourself and to others. He's planning on keeping you here permanently.

Sheridan: No. I can't stay here. No! I have to get to my baby! My baby needs me! No! Let me out, please! God! Please help me!

Luis: No. No, god. Beth, I don't think he's breathing!

Beth: Oh, luis --

[Mrs. Wallace gasps]

Luis: Come on.

Mrs. Wallace: You -- you've finally done it. You have killed sheridan's baby.

Beth: Luis! Oh, god! No! No, our baby's gone! Oh, my god!

Norma: They released him because there was nothing more they could do for him.

Sheridan: My baby can't die!

Luis: What are you talking about, mrs. Wallace? How could my son's death have been prevented?

Nurse kravitz: I knew it! It's a demon child!

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