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Passions Transcript Friday 3/8/02
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Provided by Stephanie
Proofread by Micaela
Eve: This wonít take long. I just have to swab the inside of John, Grace, Davidís mouth and get a DNA sample and send it to the lab.
John: I still say this is a waste of time. I know my dadís not working for Ivy Crane, and he'd never lie about being married to you, Mom, or about me being your son.
Eve: Grace, John, David, why donít you go into my office and then we'll get this over with.
Sam: Hastings, we donít have to do the test. Come clean now, admit you're a fraud, and I wonít press charges against you or your son.
Eve: This is it for you, Ivy. Your little plot to break up Sam and Grace is about to be exposed. Oh, itís all over for you. You're finished.
Tabitha: Whereís zombie Blondie? I thought she'd be shadowing Theresa. [Gasps]
Zombie Charity: Iím keeping an eye on my pawn. Now be quiet. Theresaís almost ready to go through with my plan to get Ethan back, and when she does, all heck is breaking loose in Harmony.
Theresa: I just wish I knew what to do. Is it right to do wrong to get Ethan back when innocent people would be hurt? Or should I just hope that things will work out on their own? Oh, I donít know. I just donít know.
Luis: Hey, sis.
Theresa: Oh, my. Flowers? And hot chocolate? Whatís going on?
Luis: Just want you to know we love you.
Theresa: Oh, I --
Pilar: How special you are to all of us.
Luis: We love you so much.
Zombie Charity: Oh, no. Not the ĎLí word.
Tabitha: Miss Thing is worried feeling a familyís love will make Theresa renege on her deal with the dark side.
Zombie Charity: Loveís not going to get you Ethan, honey. Only my plan will.
Diana: Oh, I love you, Brian. I love you so much.
Brian: You donít know how long I've waited to hear you say that.
Brian: I love you, too, Diana. I have since the moment I first laid eyes on you.
Diana: Brian, Iím sorry. I didnít mean to lead you on. I meant I love you for saving my job.
Brian: Oh. Right. Your job. I --
Diana: I didnít mean to hurt you. I would never do anything to hurt you.
Brian: No. No, itís no big deal. I -- hey, letís just write it up to a "men are from Mars, women are from Venus" moment, ok?
Diana: Are you sure?
Brian: Yeah. Yeah. And besides, you know, we got work to do.
Diana: What kind of work?
Brian: Well, I did take over waitering your tables and did quite the bang-up job, if I do say so myself.
Diana: Yes, you did. Quite a fabulous job.
Brian: Well, thank you. Thank you very much. And -- well, now I have to teach you how to do just as good a job as I do.
Diana: Oh, I donít think I can handle being a waitress anymore.
Brian: Sure, you can. Sure, you can, because you are about to be the first student in Brianís fabulous school of waitering.
Diana: Whatís the tuition?
Brian: Hmm. Thatís a good question. How about a kiss on the cheek?
Diana: You got it.
Brian: All right. So I'll go get your classroom ready, ok?
Eve: You're about to lose everything, Ivy -- or what little you have left.
Ivy: Donít be so sure, Eve. I still expect you to change those DNA test results to show that John is Grace and Davidís son.
Eve: Dream on, Ivy. Thereís no way Iím changing those test results.
Ivy: Like I said, donít be so sure, Eve. Iím expecting a special delivery, and when it arrives, you're the one who could lose everything.
Rebecca: Something is going on between Ivy and Eve. The question is, what?
Luis: Hey, Iím sorry I wasnít there for you last night. I know if I would have been there, you'd have never tried to take your own life.
Theresa: Oh, gosh, no, it wasnít your fault. I made a mistake, a horrible mistake, and it will never happen again. I mean, doing what I tried to do is never the answer to a problem.
Luis: No. Well, Iím glad you know that now, and -- well, I just want to let you know that from here on in, Iím always going to be there for you. Iím never going to let you make a mistake like that again.
Theresa: Iím sorry for what I did.
Theresa: I love you guys so much.
Pilar: Theresa, I know that what you did, you did because of your despair over Ethan.
Theresa: Well -- whoo -- you donít need to worry about Ethan getting to me anymore.
Pilar: What do you mean?
Theresa: He came by to -- to check on me earlier, and I told him that we need to make a clean break -- that I donít want to see him anymore.
Pilar: I know how difficult that must have been for you.
Luis: Yeah, well, I think you did the right thing and you had to face that reality.
Pilar: We are so proud of you.
Zombie Charity: You mean aw-ful. I detest cheap mortal sentiment.
Tabitha: Oh, as do I -- hmm.
Zombie Charity: Pilar and Luis wouldnít be so proud of Theresa if they knew that her getting rid of Ethan was part of my plan. No, no, no, not proud at all.
Tabitha: What you said earlier about the ĎLí word -- Theresa does seem affected by her familyís feeling for her. Perhaps sheís forsaken you and your plan.
Zombie Charity: Ha!
Diana: What is all this?
Brian: This is your classroom. History will show that this is where you learned the secrets of being a great waitress.
Diana: Ooh, my being a great waitress will definitely be a momentous occasion, all right.
Brian: Mm-hmm. Well, get ready because class is about to begin. When you put that apron on, come over here and take my order.
Diana: Ok. All right. Hello, my name is Diana. I will be your waitress today. How may I take your order?
Brian: No, no, no, no. That sounds rehearsed. You've got to be personable and engaging.
Diana: Well, Brian, I canít do what you do. I canít flirt and do magic tricks.
Brian: I didnít say anything about flirting to get tips.
Diana: You donít have to flirt?
Brian: No. You just have to give the impression that you could start flirting at any second.
Diana: Oh, you lost me.
Brian: Here, let me show you. I'll be you and you be me, ok?
Diana: Well, this should be interesting.
Eve: This will just take a second.
John: Iím so proud of you, Dad.
David: Proud? Why, John?
John: If anyone else was being accused the way you are, they'd be mad as hell, telling their accusers to take a flying leap. But not you, Dad. You've stayed calm because you know have nothing to hide.
David: Sometimes -- sometimes, doing the right thing has its own rewards, and donít ever forget that.
John: I wonít, Dad.
Marty: Iím at the nurses' station with the package, Mrs. Crane.
Ivy: Excellent. I'll be right there.
Rebecca: Where are you going, Ivy?
Sam: Iím really worried about Grace. I donít know what any more upsetting news might do to her.
T.C.: Sam, I am sorry that I ever mentioned my suspicions about David working for Ivy. I never knew the fallout would be like this.
Sam: Listen, donít be sorry. I've always believed that knowing the truth is better than living a lie. I just hope once the truth comes out, Grace isnít devastated by it.
T.C.: Well, Grace is definitely going to be hurt by it. Sheís a strong woman. And with you and the kids behind her, she'll get through this.
Sam: I just hope thatís enough. I mean, even someone as strong as Grace has their limit. And learning the truth about John and David could be too much for Grace to handle.
Luis: Well, we mean it. All right? You mean the world to us, and we will always be here for you, all right? Always.
Pilar: You know what? Iím going to make a fabulous dinner to celebrate you finding the strength to let go of Ethan.
Luis: No -- you know what? I want to take us all out. Iím going to take us to the Seascape Restaurant. Yeah, I'll call Miguel and have him meet us there.
Pilar: Luis, I donít mind cooking, mijo.
Hank: No, come on, Pilar. Let Luis do this. You can see how much it means to him.
Pilar: Ok, fine. But, first, we have to finish the hot chocolate I made.
Luis: All right, deal.
Luis: All right. In the meantime, I'll take you into the living room and we'll have a little brother-sister talk, ok?
Luis: All right.
Luis: Maybe you've been scared to because -- well, my temper and all, but -- look, I promise you that you can come to me with any problem that you have. I will not freak out, all right? I promise.
Theresa: Ok. Actually, Luis, there is something that I'd like your opinion on.
Luis: Yeah? What is it?
Theresa: When does the end justify the means?
Luis: Iím not sure I understand.
Theresa: What if you could get Sheridan back, but to make that happen, you had to do something wrong. Would you do it? I mean, would you do something you knew was wrong to get your true love back forever?
Timmy: Speaking as one himself, Timmy thinks zombie Charity has a lot to learn about humans.
Zombie Charity: Oh, you do, do you?
Timmy: When Luis tells Theresa he'd never do anything wrong to get Sheridan back, she'll never follow zombie Charityís plan.
Diana: Oh, I do not walk like that.
Brian: Hey, stay focused, grasshopper. Remember, this is a waitressing class, not a charm school, so you just watch me and you learn, ok? [Falsetto voice] So, how are you this fine day, sir?
Diana: Iím fine. I mean -- [Deep voice] Iím fine.
Brian: Hmm. Well, thatís good. Can I take your order? Is there anything special that I can get you, anything at all? Maybe a drink?
Diana: [Normal voice] I canít act like that.
Brian: [Normal voice] All right, maybe that was a little bit over the top.
Brian: But look, the point is all you got to do is just be engaging with people. Just be nice. People just want to be made to feel special, thatís it. Treat them as like they're a guest in your own home.
Diana: Hmm. A guest in my home. I can do that.
Brian: Well, good. Iím glad you can do that because now comes the hard part. You got to remember which order goes to which table, and you have to get it there without dropping it.
Diana: I donít think I'll ever be able to learn that.
Brian: Yes, you will, because Iím going to teach you. And no one fails in Brianís school, especially when Brian takes an interest in a particular student.
Rebecca: Oh, Ivy could win the Daytona 500 in that wheelchair. Damn! Damn, I lost her. If I only knew where she was going. I know I was this close to finding out whatís going on between her and Eve.
Ivy: Ahem. Excellent. This is my secret weapon against Eve Russell. Once I drop this on her, she'll do whatever I say and she'll do it with a smile on her face.
Sam: Grace, are you all right?
Grace: Yeah. Iím fine. John and David and I -- we're all just fine.
Sam: Yeah, I know you want to put all this behind you, but no matter what happens, I want you to know that Iím here for you and I love you very much.
Grace: I know that, sweetie. And you know what? You donít have to worry because Johnís my son, I know it, and the DNA test is going to prove it.
Rebecca: Well -- Ivyís not here. Well, where'd she go -- oh. Well, if I canít find her, at least I can cause her some more trouble. T.C.? Well, I just want you to know that I think you did the right thing by suggesting that David, John, and Grace all have a DNA test.
T.C.: You know, you are the coldest -- woman that I have ever met.
Rebecca: Excuse me?
T.C.: You're a nasty piece of work, Rebecca. A very nasty piece of work.
Rebecca: Well, I donít have to listen to this.
T.C.: Oh, yes, you do.
T.C.: Because Iím going to tell you some things that someone should have said to you a long time ago.
Luis: No. No, I couldnít do something wrong to get Sheridan back.
Theresa: Well, are you positive, Luis? I mean, if you knew that you could hold Sheridan in your arms again, if you were certain that you could spend every minute with her for the rest of your life, are you sure you wouldnít do something wrong to get her back?
Luis: Well, come one, and when you put it like that, itís a really tough call.
Hank: Whatís a tough call, Luis? What are you and Theresa talking about?
Theresa: Well, I was about to ask Mama the same question.
Pilar: What question, mija?
Theresa: If you could have Papa back, would you do something wrong to have him here with you for the rest of your life?
Pilar: No, Theresa, of course not. Doing something wrong, even if you think that it will make things right, only winds up making trouble instead. And not only that, but it opens up a door to evil, a door that can be very hard to close.
Timmy: Timmy knows Theresa will follow her familyís example, and not zombie Charityís evil plan.
Zombie Charity: All right. Look, I've had enough of this. I want Theresa taken care of and I want the two of you to do it right now!
Timmy: Zombie Charity wants Timmy and Tabby to kill Theresa?
T.C.: I canít believe how selfish and self-centered you are.
Rebecca: Why are you attacking me? Look, I was trying to compliment you, telling you how smart you were to pick up on the connection between David and Ivy. I mean, Chief Sammy and his wifey certainly didnít.
T.C.: Rebecca, I made the connection way before our little discussion at the mansion.
Rebecca: Iím sure I have no idea what you're talking about.
T.C.: You thought you were using me by going on and on about Ivy and David. But I was on to you.
Rebecca: T.C., Really, I --
T.C.: You thought you were using me, but you werenít. I was way ahead of you.
Rebecca: Well, you have some wild imagination, T.C.
T.C.: You know what? You have some gall. I mean, you werenít using me. Iím my own man, Rebecca.
Rebecca: Well, Iím sure you are. But I just wanted the truth to come out. Iím sorry if you misunderstood.
T.C.: I hate the Cranes, Ivy included, but -- Rebecca, thereís going to be a lot of people thatís going to be hurt in the process. Donít you care about that? I guess not.
Rebecca: What a stupid question. Of course I donít care about anybody else. I just want Ivyís part in all this exposed. That way Ethan wonít want to have anything to do with his mommy dearest and Sammy will hate, hate, hate Ivy. And then while Ms. Ironsides is trying to recover, Iím going to swoop in and take whatever part she has of the Crane money and power. Oh, T.C., You are so right. I am the coldest b-- woman you've ever met.
Tabitha: Zombie, what exactly do you want us to do?
Timmy: Timmy knows he could never kill anyone.
Zombie Charity: I donít want Theresa killed, you half-wit.
Timmy: Oh, whew.
Tabitha: Well, then, what do you want?
Zombie Charity: Itís so simple, even you two simpletons shouldnít be able to botch this one up. I want you and the brat to give her a different point of view than her family has.
Tabitha and Timmy: Hmm?
Zombie Charity: Oh, just listen to me and do exactly what I say.
Theresa: Are you sure, Mama?
Pilar: Iím positive, Teresita. I would never do something wrong to get your father back.
[Cooking alarm rings]
Pilar: Oh, those are cookies I have in the oven that I baked to go with the hot chocolate. Let me go get them.
Hank: Let me help you.
Luis: Theresa, I want to think some more about your question.
Luis: Well, before I was thinking like what Mama said, and now --
Theresa: Now what?
Luis: Well, the truth is Iím leaning the other way. I miss Sheridan so much. Iím going to go change. I'll talk to you about it in a few minutes, all right?
Theresa: Thanks, Luis.
[Knock on door]
Theresa: Oh. Oh, what will I do if thatís Ethan?
Theresa: Tabitha, Timmy, what brings you guys by?
Tabitha: Oh, Iím sorry to bother you, Theresa, but I was baking some cookies for shut-ins, and I suddenly realized I needed some sugar.
Theresa: Oh, well -- sure, but -- but why'd you guys come all the way over here when you could just go down to the store?
Tabitha: Oh, well, actually I decided to give my grandnephew Timmy here a lesson in small-town neighborliness.
Theresa: Oh, absolutely. Come on in. I'll get some sugar.
Tabitha: Excuse me, Theresa. I donít mean to pry, but have we come at a bad time? You look as though somethingís wrong or you have some big problem weighing on your mind. Is there anything I can do to help? I love talking to people about their problems.
Theresa: Maybe. Let me ask you a question, Tabitha. Was there ever someone in your life who you loved with all of your heart, but lost?
Tabitha: Oh -- oh, my word.
Timmyís voice: Somewhere, thereís a can missing its ham.
Tabitha: Yes, Theresa, there was someone like that in my life.
Timmyís voice: Yeah, Cain after he killed his brother.
Theresa: So, if you had a chance to get him back in your life forever, would you do something wrong to get him back?
Tabitha: Oh, what a coincidence that you've asked me the very same question I've often asked myself about my lover. Oh, it must be fate, dear.
Theresa: You really think so?
Zombie Charity: Good work Tabs. So far you're playing this just right.
Theresa: Well, Tabitha, I mean, what is your answer?
Tabitha: I'll make it simple and straightforward. Yes, Theresa, I would do something wrong to get back the man I loved. Absolutely.
Zombie Charity: Theresa is one step closer to doing evil, which means Iím one step closer to ruling Harmony.
Diana: Even if I can charm customers, I donít think I will ever be able to get their order straight.
Brian: Yes, you will. You just have to learn a few tricks of the trade, and then everything will come together. Here, come on.
["Pomp and Circumstance" plays]
Diana: Brian, you are the best teacher in the world. I really think Iím going to be a great waitress now.
Rebecca: Where have you been, Ivy?
Ivy: Why do you care, Rebecca?
Rebecca: Just curious.
Ivy: Well, you ought to learn from what happened to that poor cat and mind your own business.
Rebecca: What you're up to is my business, Ivy.
Ivy: So, how did the test go?
Eve: I took the samples and sent them to the lab. The results arenít back yet.
Ivy: Oh, I see.
Grace: But when they do come in, Iím sure they'll show that John is my son.
Ivy: Yes. Iím sure they will.
Grace: You know -- ahem -- these accusations against John and David -- I think they've given everybody a lot of stress, so, you know, I think we all deserve a night out. Maybe we should go to the Seascape Restaurant.
John: Letís do it.
T.C.: Well, sweetheart, I'll get your coat.
Ivy: Oh. Perhaps I should sup at the Seascape. Tonight could prove very interesting.
Rebeccaís voice: If you're going to the Seascape, then so am I.
Sam: Grace. Now, are you sure about this?
Grace: Oh --
Sam: I mean, what if the test comes back and John isnít your son?
Grace: Oh, Sam, I -- you donít have to worry. John is my son. Iím sure of it.
Eve: This is all going to end badly, for Grace and for John.
Sam: You know what? I'll go call and make reservations, all right?
Ivy: Yes. Reservations.
Rebecca: You know, Ivy, I donít see what you're so happy about here because once the test results come back, everyone is going to see you as the manipulator you are.
Ivy: Well, then, I should just enjoy life now, shouldnít I, dear?
Rebecca: What is that witch on wheels up to?
Ivy: Oh, yes. This is my insurance policy, guaranteed to make Eve alter the test result so everyone thinks that John is Graceís son. Then itís only a matter of time before John and David lure Grace away from Harmony, leaving Sam to find true love again with me. Well, with this, I have everything I need to make my life turn out perfectly.
Theresa: Really, Tabitha, you would do something wrong to get your true love back?
Tabitha: Oh, yes, without a doubt. To think I could have had my dear Frankie back if I had just done something a little bit wrong.
Timmyís voice: Yeah, Frankie, as in Frankenstein.
Tabitha: Oh, to reclaim the bliss we shared, to live out our dream of a long and happy life, to feel my loveís arms around me and his soft lips on mine. Oh, yes, it would definitely be worth it. Oh, sorry about me prattling on like that, but to me itís abundantly clear, dear. Donít you think it would be worth it to do something a little wrong to be with the man that you love more than anyone else in the world?
Theresa: Well, I -- I havenít decided yet.
Theresa: I'll get you that sugar, ok?
Tabitha: Oh, no, no, no, Theresa, donít bother, dear. I have sugar back at the house. Itís in my pantry. Oh, poor old me. I've been having a lot of these senior moments lately. Oh, if I hadnít lost my dear Freddy -- uh -- my Frankie -- I'd be sharp as a tack right now. You donít want to grow old alone, Theresa, dear. Do whatever it takes to get back the man of your dreams. So what if you have to do something a little bit wrong, as long as love wins out in the end. Well, come along, Timmy. We'll leave Theresa alone with her thoughts. We'll see ourselves out, dear.
Theresa: Ok. I mean, is Tabitha right? Is doing wrong actually right when it comes to love? Or is Mama right and doing wrong opens the door to evil?
Sam: Well, I made reservations at the Seascape Restaurant, but we'd better get moving because they wonít hold our tables for long.
Sam: Ok? Last chance to come clean, Hastings.
David: Everything will be proven true or false in good time, Sam.
Sam: Itís your neck.
David: Yeah, well, we'll see about that.
Grace: Look, donít you worry. I donít need some test to prove to me that you're my son. I know you are. I know it in my heart.
Ivy: Are you sure you wonít change those DNA test results, Eve? Because if you donít, you're going to be ripping Graceís heart out. Are you sure she can stand to lose another son?
Rebecca: When the test results come back, Ivy will be left without a leg to stand on -- oh -- no pun intended. And then all the Crane money and power will be mine.
Brian: By George, I think sheís got it.
Diana: By George, I think you're right. I canít believe starting tomorrow; I wonít need you to help keep me from being fired. I'll actually be able to wait tables all by myself and get tips all of my own! Thank you, Brian. Thank you so much.
Brian: Someday you'll be mine, Diana. Someday you'll love me as much as I love you.
Theresa: Well, you've had a while to think about it. Would you do something wrong of if you knew you could get Sheridan back?
Luis: Well -- and I know I've given you a couple different answers, but -- well, the truth is I donít know what I'd do.
Hank: Well, hey, letís get going, all right?
Luis: All right.
Pilar: Letís go.
Pilar: Letís go.
Theresa: What am I going to do? I mean, do I hope that things work out on their own, or do I follow Julianís plan and do something wrong to get Ethan back?
Tabitha: Brace yourself, Timmy. Zombie Blondie will probably be angry with us for failing to convince Theresa to go with the dark sideís plan.
Timmy: Timmy shouldnít be in any trouble. Tabby did all the talking.
Zombie Charity: You did good with Theresa.
Tabitha: We did? Oh, I mean, yes, we did, hmm?
Zombie Charity: Pilar doesnít know it yet, but Theresa has opened the door to evil, and Iím ready to rush on in and bring some evil to Harmony.
Tabitha: You go, zombie girl!
Zombie Charity: Soon Theresaís going to commit to my plan and pain and chaos will run through Harmony like water in the mighty Mississippi.
Tabitha: My only worry is that we donít get caught up in the pain and drowning of that river.
Zombie Charity: [Gasps] Incoming vibe. Evilís going to be unleashed at the Seascape Restaurant. Come on, letís get a move on. We donít want to miss todayís special -- a heaping helping of hell with a side order of sin and more suffering than anyone can stomach for dessert. Come on!
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