Passions Transcript Tuesday 7/31/01
Norma: Where could Tabitha and Timmy be? Oh, I'll flay them alive when I find them.
Tabitha: I don't know what to do, Timmy. Either we stay here in Harmony and wait for Norma to chop us up or we go to warlock island, where certain death awaits us.
Timmy: Timmy sure wishes there was a third choice.
Tabitha: As do I, lad, but there isn't. No matter how you slice it, we're dead meat.
Simone: Yeah, it's about time.
Miguel: Charity? What is it?
Jessica: She had another premonition.
Charity: It was horrible. They were all crying out in so much pain. All: No, no!
Charity: Sam and Grace, Ethan and Theresa, and Sheridan and Luis. Even Tabitha and her doll. They're doomed, Miguel. They're all doomed.
Grace: David looks so calm, like he wants this test. Maybe I was married to him but I just can't remember because of my amnesia.
Sam: No, you couldn't have been, all right? Hastings is just putting up a brave front, that's all. He knows he's about to be proven he's a liar.
Grace: What do you think, eve?
Eve: I think we should just wait for the lie-detector test. It should reveal the truth.
Sam: And the truth is David Hastings isn't your husband. He never was. I am. End of story.
Ethan: Did you hear my cell phone ring? No messages.
Chad: You got to chill out, man. Look, when Theresa's ready to talk to you, she'll call you.
Ethan: Chad, look, I was way too hard on her. Yeah, I mean, I was upset she knew I wasn't a Crane and didn't tell me, but, you know, we can work that out. You know, the next time I see Theresa, I'm going to kiss her and hold her close and never let her go.
Whitney: Theresa, you're crazy if you think you can convince Julian Crane to make it so that Ethan can be a Crane again.
Theresa: I have to, Whitney. I have to undo all the horrible things I've done. Having information about Ethan on my computer that someone e-mailed to the tabloid ruined his life. It robbed him of everything that he held dear. No, I have to get it back for him, no matter what it takes.
Luis: You know, I am so glad that we decided to take this honeymoon trip. Even if the double wedding was a bust.
Sheridan: I'm glad, too. I feel badly for Ethan and Theresa. I'm sure they'll work things out and then the four of us can finally get married. But until then, it is just you, me, and beautiful Bermuda.
Luis: That's right. Don't have to worry about Alistair or Julian or Rebecca trying to break us up, do we? We're just going to enjoy ourselves.
Julian: That Luis and Sheridan will be in Bermuda at the same time I'm there to file my divorce papers is a stunning coincidence, to say the least. I've even come up with a germ of a plan to kill my poor sister and perhaps Luis, given the distance he'll be from Harmony.
Rebecca: Look, I'm sure it's a brilliant plan, pookie. Just make sure you file the divorce papers first.
Julian: Oh, yes, I will, my pet.
Rebecca: Are you sure you're not taking that paper along so you can lust after Theresa on the airplane?
Julian: Oh, don't be absurd. I haven't had a chance to read the financial pages yet.
Rebecca: Oh, you know, I wasn't aware that they had financial pages in the tabloids.
Julian: Only two things matter at this moment -- divorcing Ivy and doing away with my poor sister. While I'm in sunny Bermuda, I will be able to kill two birds with one stone.
Ivy: Who are you going to kill now, Julian?
Timmy: Maybe Norma will just give up and go home. Or better yet, join the merchant marines.
Tabitha: No, Timmy. Norma's like an infestation of roaches. Once you get them, they never go away.
Norma: Oh, father. Father, maybe we should give up and go home. The motel doesn't run itself since I gave the staff the axe. [As father] no, Norma! You will finish the job you came to do. Timmy and Tabitha are around here somewhere. You're going to find them and kill them like a good little girl! [Normal voice] oh. Yes, father. Oh. When I get my hands on Tabitha and Timmy, I'm going to hack them to pieces. Bit by blood bit.
Reese: Charity looks really upset. It's a good thing you didn't tell her about that story I found on the internet, about the two girl cousins who came to warlock island.
Simone: Two girls who were in love with the Same guy?
Reese: Yeah. Isn't it weird that the one cousin who could tell the future couldn't see her own death on the island? Then the other cousin marries the boy.
Kay: Yeah, that's actually why I agreed not to tell her, Reese, because she's already pretty weirded-out as it is.
Miguel: Hey, Reese? Would you and jess mind getting Charity something to drink? A water or something?
Reese: Yeah, sure, Miguel.
Charity: Thank you.
Simone: The story that Reese told you worries me, Kay.
Kay: Yeah, it's kind of creepy, isn't it?
Simone: Not as creepy as what you're thinking -- that the story will repeat itself with you and Miguel and Charity?
Kay: Simone, it's not like I want anything bad to happen to Charity, all right, but if it did, the story repeats itself, then it's not my fault. It'll be because of fate. And if fate wants me to be with Miguel, who am I to argue?
Miguel: I mean, none of your premonitions about the wedding came true. You know, Sheridan didn't die. You know, and I bet these latest premonitions you're having -- I bet they're not going to come true, either.
Charity: I hope not, Miguel. But they're so strong. I see so much pain coming to so many people. So much pain.
Eve: Is your real name David Hastings?
Eve: Have you ever been to Harmony before?
Eve: Have you ever been married to Grace Bennett?
David: Yes. Yes, I have.
Julian: I'm killing our marriage, Ivy. I'm putting it out of its misery. You see, within the hour, I'm jetting down to Bermuda to file our final divorce decree.
Julian: Oh, save your astonishment for the results of your first home perm. You had to have known this was coming.
Rebecca: Well, yes, I mean, Julian and I are engaged. You've been served with divorce papers. I've done everything but help you pack, Ivy.
Julian: I've made no secret that I wanted out of this miserable marriage since I first learned that you lied to me about Ethan being my son. So why don't you take a good look around. Look, but don't touch. You see, today's the last day that you can enjoy the trappings of this estate, the Crane name, and all the privileges that go with it because tomorrow you're going to be nothing but a member of the great unwashed. You see, when I return from Bermuda, I'm going to see to it that you're finally tossed out of this mansion on your lying, adulterous butt!
Theresa: Thank you for lending me these clothes, Whitney. Now you promise not to tell anyone what I'm up to or where I'm going? Don't even tell anyone that you've seen me.
Whitney: Theresa, will you at least call your mom? I mean, you should at least talk to her.
Theresa: Later, when I make things right.
Whitney: You know, I still think you are making a huge mistake. Julian Crane will never accept Ethan back into the Crane family. And what about his reputation? I mean, the man is a complete pig when it comes to women, always hitting on them all the time.
Theresa: I can handle Mr. Crane.
Whitney: Ok, what about last time when you guys were in Bermuda and he all of a sudden snuck in your room?
Theresa: Well, that was a mistake. The hotel gave him the wrong key.
Whitney: Yeah, Theresa, I wonder if it was really a mistake.
Theresa: Whit, I am not going to Bermuda. I'm going to be perfectly safe right here in Harmony. Now, I have to talk to Julian right away. And then when I finally do talk to Ethan, I will have made amends for the mistakes that I've made and we can get married.
Whitney: But, honey, you don't have to make amends. Ethan loves you. He wants to work everything out.
Theresa: Well, I don't love myself right now. And until I do something to make up for what I've done, I can't face Ethan, much less marry him.[Knock on door]
Chad: Yo, Whitney, it's me. Listen, I'm trying to help take Ethan's mind off of Theresa, so, you know, I'm thinking maybe we could all head down to the book cafe to hang out for a while.
Ethan: Hey, Chad, I've been thinking -- I don't want to go the book cafe.
Chad: Well, hey, man, if you're not up for the book cafe, that's cool. I mean, we could -- hey, we could go to the park. And you've got your cell phone on you in case Theresa calls. All right. Yo, Whitney, you coming or not?
Theresa: I don't want him to find me here.
Whitney: Um, I'll meet you guys downstairs, ok?
Chad: That's ok. We'll wait right here for you.
Whitney: Come on, Theresa, just go out there and talk to him right now.
Theresa: I can't! Not yet!
Ethan: Hey, Whitney? Who you talking to in there? Is Theresa in there with you?
Sheridan: This resort is amazing.
Luis: Glad you like it.
Luis: Hey, what do you say, uh, we go check out one of those private hot tubs, relax for a while?
Sheridan: That sounds perfect. Then again, anywhere I'm with you is perfect.
Timmy: Timmy doesn't see Norma. He wonders where she went.
Tabitha: Well, I don't care. Let's just seize the moment, get off this boat, go home, barricade ourselves in the attic until I can think of a way to get rid of that Lizzie Borden wanna-be. [Horn]
Timmy: What was that?
Tabitha: Oh, no. Oh, that's the horn signaling the boat's departure.
Timmy: Tabby, quick, abandon ship, abandon ship!
Tabitha: No, it's too late, Timmy. The boat's leaving the dock. We're on our way to warlock island and certain death.
Miguel: Warlock island, here we come.
Miguel: I guarantee you that we are going to have an unforgettable time.
Jessica: Hey, here.
Charity: Oh, thank you.
Miguel: Thanks, man.
Jessica: Feeling better?
Charity: You know, actually, I am. I think that I left my bad feelings behind when we left the dock. I'm starting to feel better.
Kay: You know, Charity wouldn't be feeling better if she knew what was in store for her at warlock island.
Sam: Malloy, get Hastings out of here so we can talk.
David: The lie-detector test will show I'm telling the truth. I'm your husband, Grace. I have been for over 20 years.
Sam: Get him out of here now.
Grace: So what does the test show, eve?
Sam: I know what it shows. He's nothing but a pathological liar.
Ivy: I cannot believe you're going to finalize our divorce after everything that happened to me at the wedding yesterday.
Julian: Well, it's your own fault if your automobile insurance rates go up.
Rebecca: Julian is right. I mean, you chose to ram your car through the doors of the church. Now, i, on the other hand, was the victim of a one-peasant revolt when Pilar just -- just attacked me and threw me into the fountain.
Ivy: Oh, please. That hardly compares to me finding out that the woman my son was about to marry is the same little snake who tipped to the tabloids that he wasn't a Crane -- an act which ruined Ethan's life as well as mine.
Rebecca: I tried to warn you about Theresa.
Julian: Oh, Rebecca's right, my soon-to-be ex. You have no one to blame for that fiasco but yourself. You are the one who invited Theresa into this house and hired her to be your personal assistant.
Ivy: You're the one who kept pushing Ethan on her.
Julian: I merely suggested he have a romp with the help. I never meant for him to marry the wench. No, you planted that little nugget with your "marry for true love" speech.
Rebecca: Julian's right again. If you hadn't given Theresa your approval, then Ethan never would have chosen her over Gwen.
Julian: Why are we even discussing this? Ethan isn't even my son. No matter how hot and deliciously desirable she may be.
Rebecca: Hello! Future wife in the house? Once you Are out of here will be just as happy as we were. And you -- I don't care if you have Theresa or not after what she did to Ethan.
Julian: The subject of Theresa Lopez Fitzgerald is closed as I am off to Bermuda to file our final divorce decree.
Ivy: You know, Julian, I am not going to let you get away with this.
Julian: Let me remind you that this is all your fault -- that you lied to me for over 20 years, telling me from the first breath he took that Ethan was my son. You lied to my father, you lied to our other children, to Gwen. Even to your true love, Sam Bennett. Lies! Damn you for your lies. You shattered the one comfort I had. That was the truth that I was Ethan's father, and he was the best son a man could have. So as far as I'm concerned, you deserve every rotten thing you're going to get.
Theresa: I don't want to see Ethan right now.
Ethan: Whitney? Hey, who are you talking to in there? It sounds like Theresa.
Whitney: I have to let them in, Theresa.
Theresa: No, you can't.
Whitney: I'm sorry, Theresa, it's best for you. I have to.
Ethan: Is Theresa in there?
Whitney: Ethan, I was just on the phone.
Ethan: Look, I'm sorry, Whitney. I thought I heard Theresa. I guess I'm just so desperate to talk to her to tell her how much I love her. You know, I guess I -- I just wanted to see her so bad that I just imagined that I heard her.
Chad: Hey, look, come on, man, why don't we go take that walk, all right?
Chad: Hey, Whitney, I'm going to go back to my room and get my wallet and then we'll swing back by here and pick you up, ok?
Whitney: Ok, I'll be ready.
Chad: All right.
Theresa: That was close.
Whitney: I still think you should've just talked to the man.
Theresa: I will, Whitney, after I make things right. Now remember, you promise not to let anyone know that you've seen me?
Whitney: I won't.
Theresa: Than. I'm going to go out the back way.
Whitney: Ok. Well, I'd better put this wedding dress somewhere nobody's going to find it.
Ethan: That's Theresa's dress. She was here?
Julian: Yes, this is all your fault, Ivy. You have no one to blame but yourself. You have no one to turn to. Ethan's gone. In a few hours, I'll be rid of you. Even your true love, Sam Bennett, is reconciled with little mousy Grace. You've lost everything, even your heart's desire of a future with Ethan's father. Oh, what can I say? All's well that ends well.
Maid: I'm sorry to interrupt, Mr. Crane. Your car is ready to take you to the airport. And I'm told the Crane jet is fueled and awaiting your arrival.
Julian: Ah, merci.
Julian: When I come back from Bermuda, I want you and the misery you've caused me lo these many years out of this mansion for good.
Eve: I'm sorry. David passed the lie-detector test with flying colors just like he did the psychiatric exam.
Grace: Oh, my God. Then everything he said is true.
Sam: Not necessarily.
Sam: A lie-detector test monitors fluctuations in heart rate, breathing rates, physical changes that come from emotions. Some people are able to control their emotions so well, they can fool a lie-detector. Isn't that right, eve?
Eve: Yes. But it's rare.
Grace: So he could be my husband.
Sam: No. He can't. You're my wife.
Eve: Sam, I know that this is not what you want to hear, but the man has passed not only one but two tests that speak to the heart of his credibility. Now, you have to admit it's making it harder and harder to doubt him.
Sam: Look, I don't give a damn how many tests he cheats his way through. I don't believe a word he says. All right, this story about the boat being sunk, all right, losing his personal papers, his marriage license -- how convenient. Wait a second. A marriage license. That's it! I know how we can prove that he's lying.
Tabitha: Those warlocks hold one hell of a grudge, Timmy. If I as much as set foot on that island, I'm finished, and you will be, too, because you're my creation.
Timmy: Just because the boat's heading to warlock island doesn't mean Timmy and tabby have to go there.
Tabitha: What are you babbling about?
Timmy: Well, when the boat gets to warlock island, we'll just stay on the boat and not go ashore and then head back to Harmony. Problem solved.
Tabitha: Oh, Timmy, you're a genius! Why didn't I think of that?
Timmy: You would have, tabby, if you weren't so afraid of the warlock island.
Tabitha: That's right. We'll wait till the boat docks. When the kids go ashore, we'll go to the bridge, tell the captain we got on the wrong boat and we want to ride back to Harmony with him.
Timmy: What about Norma?
Tabitha: Oh. We'll worry about her when we get home. Just be glad that that old battle axe isn't here right at this moment. Come on, Tim Tim, let's go.
Reese: Ahoy, captain! Passenger Reese Durkee with a request. [Captain grunts]
Reese: We've been exploring your vessel, sir, and we'd like permission to go below deck and see the engine room. [Captain grunts]
Reese: Aye, aye, captain, sir!
Norma: I love the sea. Fresh salt air, sound of the waves, and fishing to die for. Oh, Tabitha and Timmy don't know it yet -- they're my catch of the day.
Sam: Ok, Hastings. I'm going to give you one more chance to tell the truth before I expose you for the lowlife scam artist that you are.
David: I'm sorry, chief Bennett, I have been telling the truth. And I know the lie-detector test i just took will prove that. Right, dr. Russell?
Eve: I can say that you've passed the test, Mr. Hastings. That's all I can say.
David: Why won't you believe me? I'm Grace's husband. It's as simple as that.
Sam: I won't believe you because my gut tells me that you're a liar. Now, you claim that you and Grace were married in Hartford, right?
David: Yes, Hartford.
Sam: And you say that you lost your marriage license when your boat sank?
David: That's true.
Sam: Ok, then. Well, how about if I just give the department of records a call over in Hartford to see if they have a copy of your marriage license?
David: I think that's a great idea.
Eve: You do?
David: Yes, I wish I'd thought of it myself.
Sam: He's bluffing, Grace. And once I prove that you're lying, I'm going to throw the book at you for stalking, kidnapping, and any other charges I can stick you with.
Luis: I guess the bellhop was right. This place looks nice and private.
Sheridan: I don't think anyone will disturb us.
Luis: Oh, yes. [Sheridan giggles]
Sheridan: This is wonderful.
Luis: I know how to make it even better.
Sheridan: Really? How?
Julian: Hello, father?
Alistair: I'm busy, Julian. What is it?
Julian: I'll only take a moment of your time.
Alistair: What about the time you're wasting in Bermuda filing your divorce papers when you should be forming a plan to kill Sheridan?
Julian: That's why I'm calling -- to tell you that i've come up with a foolproof plan to kill Sheridan and maybe Luis.
Alistair: I'm listening.
Julian: What if I told you that Sheridan will die in what looks like an accident and Luis will blame himself if he lives?
Alistair: I'd say interesting. No, no, no, amazing that your brandy-soaked brain could possibly handle.
Julian: If I can't pull this off, you can strip me of my trust fund, any possibility of ever being your heir. I won't make a peep.
Alistair: Well, Julian, you sound surprisingly confident.
Julian: I'm positive that my plan will result in Sheridan's death, and if Luis survives, he'll torture himself for the rest of his life thinking it was his fault.
Whitney: Ethan, I am so, so sorry.
Ethan: Whitney, why did you lie to me? Why didn't you tell me Theresa was here?
Whitney: I'm sorry, Ethan, but Theresa begged me not to say anything to you. I didn't even know she was here till I got home just now.
Ethan: Well, why didn't she want to talk to me?
Whitney: Trust me, She does want to talk to you, just not yet, that's all.
Whitney: I'm sorry, but I promised her that I wouldn't say anything to you or anyone else.
Ethan: Well, can you at least tell me where she went? Wait. She couldn't have gone far. Maybe I can catch her. Theresa!
Theresa: I have to convince Mr. Crane to take Ethan back into the family.
Rebecca: Bye, pookie! Call me when you get to the hotel!
Rebecca: Ivy? Do you hear that? Oh, it's the clock ticking off your hours as Mrs.. Crane. Once he's back here, he's going to marry me, and then I will be Mrs.. Julian Crane and everything that goes with that name will be mine. I will be the one sitting on the board of the world's most famous charities and you will be the one sitting on the bench outside the book cafe, begging strangers for spare change -- or doing God-knows-what to get it. You see, as Julian comes back from Bermuda with your divorce papers, he and I will be married.
Ivy: And no two people deserve each other more.
Rebecca: Oh, why, thank you, Ivy. And just to show you that there are no hard feelings, if you really need the work, I can make sure that you get a job working in the kitchen preparing the food for our gala wedding party.
Theresa: Oh, Mr. Crane is going to Bermuda? Oh, then that's where I have to go. No, wait a minute. Me alone with Mr. Crane in Bermuda? No, no, what happened last time I was down there was just a mistake. I mean, the hotel gave Mr. Crane the wrong key. He didn't know he got into bed with me. I'll be fine. Everything is going to be fine once I talk to Julian. It's the only way that I can save my relationship with Ethan. [Coughing]
Reese: It was really cool to see the engine room, wasn't it?
Kay: Yeah, Reese, fascinating.
Jessica: Well, I think so.
Reese: Did you know that marine engines differ from car engines?
Miguel: Hey, you guys, I think we're almost to warlock island. We should probably get our stuff together.
Charity: I just wanted to thank you for being so gentle with me. I know i've been saying a lot of really crazy things lately --
Miguel: Y don't have to thank me.
Charity: No, listen, listen. It's so nice to know that you're always right there beside me, supporting me when other people think I'm not so normal.
Miguel: Charity, I'm always going to be beside you. I love you, and I always will. And we're soul mates, remember? Together forever.
Charity: Together forever.
Kay: You better just enjoy your time now with him, Charity, because legend says you will not make it off this island alive.
Tabitha: Ok, Tim Tim, time to find the bridge and speak to the captain. Soon we'll be far, far away from warlock island. Good. There's the captain. We'll tell him we accidentally got on the wrong boat and we didn't mean to come to warlock island and we want to ride back to Harmony with him. What could be simpler than that? Excuse me, sir, captain, might we have a word with you, please.
Tabitha: Excuse me, captain. It seems we have a slight problem. We boarded the wrong boat. Warlock island is actually the last place we wanted to come to, so we'd like to ride back to Harmony with you, if that's all right -- and I can't, for the life of me, think why it wouldn't be.
Norma: Well, it isn't! [Tabitha and Timmy scream]
Norma: Do you know what we do with stowaways?
Timmy: Throw them overboard?
Norma: Yes! After I've chopped them into teeny, tiny pieces!
Simone: Yeah? I like it! Oo party! I'm hungry.
Miguel: You're always hungry.
Charity: What is it?
Miguel: I just haven't seen a smile on your face in a long time.
Charity: Well, you know what? Ever since we got to the island, I feel like all my cares just went away.
Miguel: I'm glad. You know, maybe everyone was right. You just needed to get away from Harmony for a while.
Charity: Yeah, I think so. I don't know why, but I feel like we're going to have this incredible adventure here on this warlock island. Kay's voice: Incredible for me because legend says I'll finally get Miguel while you lose everything, Charity, even your life.
Ethan: I couldn't find Theresa.
Chad: Whitney, you see Ethan's hurting. Can't you just tell him where Theresa ran off to?
Whitney: Look I don't like this, either. I tried to talk Theresa out it, but she made me promise not to say anything.
Ethan: Look, I respect what you're doing, Whitney. It's just that I'm worried. Theresa goes off doing things without thinking about the consequences. I just hope she doesn't end up getting hurt, physically or emotionally.
Theresa: Hi, I'm Theresa Lopez Fitzgerald. I called on the way here to reserve a ticket for your next flight to Bermuda.
Agent: Here we are. Whenever I see a pretty young woman flying down to the islands, I know she's going there to chase a dream.
Theresa: You're right. This trip will either be a dream come true or a nightmare.
Agent: I hope things work out just the way you want them to.
Theresa: Thanks. I hope so, too.
Julian: Oh. What a delicious morsel of young womanhood you are. Like ripening fruit, ready to be plucked and savored. Oh! Why am I fantasizing about Theresa when I have the insatiable Rebecca waiting for me in Harmony? Ahem. Focus, Julian. It's time to concentrate on the business at hand -- finalizing my divorce, getting rid of Sheridan. I promised father I'd do in my poor sister, perhaps her lawman lover. I must come through. My future as heir to the Crane empire depends on it.
Luis: I don't think I realized how tense I was till i got out of Harmony.
Sheridan: We both were.
Luis: I couldn't relax, couldn't let my guard down. I was constantly worrying about Julian and Alistair and their threats to try and break and us up. Now I don't have to worry about them or their threats.
Rebecca: Poor Ivy. You've lost everything -- Ethan, the Crane money, the Crane mansion, the Crane power, and Sam.
Ivy: You know, Rebecca, I have just about had my fill of you.
Rebecca: Yes, Sam Bennett. Oh, your one true love. Now, how many times and how many ways did you try to win him back? I lost count. But you still lost him to Grace. No, they -- they held on to their marriage with all the strength their unmanicured hands could muster, and I hear that the Bennett's actually do believe that marriage is forever, and, see, that means Sam is never going to leave Grace. Not now, not ever.
Ivy: I know, Rebecca. I've come to accept the fact that I will never win Sam away from Grace.
Rebecca: Oh, good for you, Ivy. Because miracles just don't happen to losers like you. They just don't.
Sam: Incoming fax from area code 860. That's Hartford. This is it, Grace. We're about to have the proof from the department of records that David Hastings has been lying all along.
Grace: I hope you're right, Sam. But please know whatever happens, I love you.
Sam: Listen, there is nothing to worry about. You were never married to David Hastings. I'd bet my life on it.