[an error occurred while processing this directive] Passions Transcript Tuesday 7/17/01 [an error occurred while processing this directive]
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Passions Transcript Tuesday 7/17/01

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Tabitha: Will today's double wedding be a lesson in pain and suffering?

Demon: Yes. When Luis unwittingly slips the poisoned wedding ring on Sheridan's finger, it's ding-dong, the bride is dead.

Tabitha: And what about Ethan and Theresa?

Demon: The tabloid headline from hell will tear them apart. And a livid Ivy Crane will be driven to murder.

Timmy: Oh. Timmy guesses it could be worse.

Demon: And as an evil bonus --

Timmy: Timmy and his big mouth.

Demon: The stranger stalking Grace Bennett will tear her away from her family and destroy her life.

Tabitha: Oh, this calls for a celebration. To love and happiness being destroyed. Let's have our own wedding, Tim Tim, you and I.

T.C.: That creep actually took Grace back to his room at the b and b? Unbelievable.

Sam: Look, the guy's a stalker. He says he'll only talk to Grace alone. No way I'm going to let that happen.

T.C.: I don't blame you.

Eve: Grace, are you ok?

Grace: Yeah, I'm fine except for wondering who this David Hastings is. I mean, what could he want from me?

Eve: Why don't you just try and take that off your mind.

Grace: Wish I could, Eve, but I can't. I had a premonition that he took me away from my family and everyone that I love.

Cristina: The beautiful lasso of flowers is a tradition in our culture.

Francisco: Cristina and I will bring the lasso up to you and Theresa after you kneel in front of the priest. We'll put one end around you, her and Theresa, then tighten the lasso until you're pulled close together.

Chad: Hey, that sounds pretty cool.

Whitney: Hey, both you guys have to shoo. Come on, come on.

Luis: Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Whitney: Theresa and Sheridan are on their way to the bridal room, ok? You guys can't see them before the ceremony. It's bad luck. Go on. Go.

Luis: Well, it's a little too late.

Ethan: We already saw our brides today. 

Whitney: Yeah, well, no one else knows that, so just pretend like you're honoring some noble tradition, ok? We don't want bad luck. Let's go. Come on.

Francisco: We'll all go inside then.

Cristina: Come on, Luis. Pretty soon you and your beautiful bride are going to be together for the rest of your lives.

Jessica: Psst. Is the coast clear?

Whitney: Yep.

Jessica: Ok, it's safe to come in. 

Reese: Wow. You two look beautiful. Like angels.

Theresa: Oh, thank you, Reese. 

Kay's voice: I have to be good. I have to be good.

Charity: I can't wait for our own wedding someday.

Miguel: You ok? [Sheridan screams]

Miguel: Charity, what's wrong?

Charity: It's nothing.

Charity's voice: At least I hope it's nothing.

Sheridan: I'm sure that Everything will be perfect for us today.

Theresa: Nothing will ruin our wedding.

Gwen's voice: Nothing except a tabloid headline naming you as the person who revealed Ethan isn't a Crane. Enjoy your bliss, Theresa, because this is as close as you're going to get to being Ethan's wife.

Rebecca: If we hadn't gotten to the cottage in time, then Gwen would have been killed by wearing Sheridan's poisoned wedding ring.

Julian: Well, we did get to the cottage in time, and Gwen is just fine. Alas, Sheridan is not. I've already lost my son. Now I'm about to lose my sister. Poor Sheridan, sacrificed simply because Luis might find out what really happened to his father were he to marry her and gain full access to the Crane estate. Well, why don't we talk about more pleasant things, hmm?

Rebecca: Are you sure you haven't heard any screams coming from Ivy's room?

Julian: Why do you keep asking me that? What is going on?

Rebecca: Well, I -- [telephone rings]

Rebecca: Hello?

Gwen: Has Ivy seen the tabloid yet?

Rebecca: No, I don't think so. But when she does, she is going to make mincemeat out of Theresa and Ethan will be yours again.

Gwen: I can't wait to see Theresa get what's coming to her. Bye. Statue: Shame on you, Gwen Hotchkiss. Your plot to ruin Theresa's happiness will bring evil to Harmony. Beware that what you destroy is not your own life.

Ivy: "Surprise revelation: Former Ethan Crane done in by his fiancée." Oh, Theresa did this. Oh, that little bitch! I will kill her for destroying my son's life. I swear to God I will kill her! 

Tabitha: A devil's food cake to commemorate the wedding from hell which Sheridan and Luis and Ethan and Theresa will suffer through.

Timmy: Then Timmy and tabby aren't getting married?

Tabitha: Married? What is this, "Jerry Springer"? When I said we'd have our own wedding, I meant we'd have a wedding reception, a party to dishonor the ill-fated foursome. [Tabitha plays "taps"] [cat meows]

Tabitha: Well, I'm not going to let you and fluffy dampen my mood.

Timmy: Why is tabby so upbeat when your horoscope predicts nothing but doom, gloom, and kaboom?

Tabitha: Because with all the evil aimed at today's wedding, I doubt there'll be enough left over to zap us with. [Wind chimes ring] [moaning]

Timmy: Do you know who that sounded like, tabby? Norma, from the motel that Timmy and tabby stayed at when they were on the run from Hecuba. [Tabitha screams]

Tabitha: Norma? No, it couldn't be that ax-wielding psycho. After trying to slice and dice us, she's probably been locked up in a nut house by now.

Norma: Oh, fudge! Ever since Tabitha and Timmy were here, father can't keep his head on straight. I'll make those two freaks pay for hurting you, father. [Low voice] that's right, Norma. Make them pay! Kill them. Kill them both! [Normal voice] oh, I will, father. I will. And this time -- this time they won't get away. 

Statue: Beware of the evil your plotting will soon unleash.

Gwen: Ok. Whoo. So getting sick earlier at Sheridan's just made me a little dizzy. And there's nothing evil about me wanting to have Ethan back. Theresa's evil for stealing him from me in first place. But once Ethan and Ivy see today's tabloid, she's going to get what's coming to her and I can get Ethan back.

Ethan: We've come a long way, haven't we, Luis?

Luis: Yeah. Yeah, we sure have. You're going to be my brother after today. You'll be part of our family, and, well, as my brother-in-law, I just want you to know that I'll fight for you just like I would fight for anyone else in my family.

Ethan: I feel the same way.

Sheridan: Hey. I had no idea we were so close to starting the wedding. We've got to get back to the brides' room and finish getting ready.

Theresa: Ok, ok.

Pilar: I'm going to see if Francisco and Cristina need my help.

Kay: Ok.

Whitney: Well, Everyone is so happy. I think we did the right thing not telling Theresa and Ethan about the tabloid.

Chad: Yeah. Yeah, maybe you're right, I mean, the tabloid won't be out till after the wedding, so Ethan and Theresa can enjoy getting married. At least nobody can take that away from them.

Julian: What are you hiding from me, Rebecca? After Ivy hid the fact that Ethan wasn't my son for some 20-odd years from me, I'm just a wee bit sensitive to women and their secrets.

Rebecca: I'm not trying to hide anything from you, pookie. I just wanted to make sure something was true before I told you.

Julian: Well, then out with it.

Rebecca: Well, I heard from a little birdie who the person was that e-mailed the tabloid with Ivy's secret, the one that Ethan is Sam's son.

Julian: Who? Who?

Rebecca: Well, you can imagine my shock when I found out that the tipster is none other than Theresa Lopez Fitzgerald. And the tabloid is running the story today.

Ivy: Ok, think. How would Theresa have this information? Pilar knew, but Pilar would never have told her, never. Oh, who cares how Theresa knew? She knew! It's here in black and white! Oh, that traitor! That two-faced little traitor. Theresa is going to die!

Eve: Grace, don't you even worry about this David person. Now that Sam has him locked up, everything's going to be fine.

Grace: You know, Eve, I have never even seen him before. Why would he suddenly show up in Harmony saying that he's come for me?

Eve: Let Sam find out. You just concentrate on your family and rebuilding your house.

Grace: I can't do that. I think I have to talk to him. I have to know what's going on.

Eve: No. No, Grace, that is not a good idea. Now, based on what Sam said, this man sounds like he could be unbalanced. No, you just forget him. Oh, T.C.'s waving at me.

Grace: I can't do that, Eve. I have to find out more about this David Hastings. 

Officer: Hastings. Make your one call.

David: Yeah, it's me. Calling from Harmony. Yeah, I found her. It's Grace, no doubt about it. Yeah, I know what I have to do. And I will. And if I know Grace, she can't stop thinking about who I am or why I'm here. She'll be by to see me soon. And when she does, I'll take her away from here. I'll take her further away from Harmony than she ever thought possible.

Whitney: Well, I better go help Theresa finish getting ready.

Chad: Hey, Whit. Listen, I was thinking about how you kissed me before when I said I didn't tell Ethan about the tabloid story on Theresa sending that e-mail, and --

Whitney: I told you to just forget about that kiss, ok?

Chad: Yeah, well, I can't, all right? And despite your denial, I don't think you can, either. You know, and the fact that you can just worry about Ethan and Theresa's love and sacrifice ours just because you made some promise to Simone that she don't Even know about I think is just whack.

Whitney: Look, I told you, I can't and I won't hurt my little sister.

Chad: What about us? True love comes once. Once in a lifetime, Whitney. And you're just throwing ours away.

Whitney: I'm sorry.

Francisco: Another part of the ceremony are the arras, where 13 gold coins in a miniature white coffer will symbolize prosperity in the homes that Ethan, Theresa, Luis, and Sheridan will share.

Father Lonigan: I'm familiar with the cultural significance of the arras. I've performed a number of Hispanic marriages.

Ethan: I hope they come in bigger denominations because I don't have a job yet.

Cristina: Don't worry. Don't worry, Ethan. You know what? You'll eventually get one, and meanwhile, you and Theresa can live on love.

Ethan: You know, she's starting to sound like Theresa now.

Sam: What a strange day. I have a son getting married -- a son I barely know.

Eve: Oh, Sam. I know this must hurt you very much. I can't imagine what it would be like to have a son suddenly appear out of nowhere into my life.

Jessica: Charity, what's wrong?

Charity: It's nothing.

Jessica: I'm your cousin. We live together? I think I can tell when something's bothering you. What is it?

Charity: I had a premonition about Sheridan during the wedding rehearsal -- that she was in terrible pain during the actual ceremony.

Jessica: Nervous, maybe, but Sheridan looks fine to me.

Charity: Look, I know. It doesn't make sense to me, either, but I can't get over the feeling that there's evil close by, that terrible violence is coming to the church.

Jessica: But what kind of evil could come to a church? 

Sheridan: Oh, my goodness. The rings. I have got to get the rings to Luis.

Gwen: Relax, Sheridan. I have them right here. Sheridan: Ok.

Gwen: Ok? 

Sheridan: Sorry.  ok.

Charity: I'll take them to Luis.

Gwen: Oh, ok. [Sheridan screams]

Gwen: Charity, what's wrong? You dropped the ring as though it hurt you to touch it.

Julian: Theresa sent the damning e-mail? That doesn't make sense. [Telephone rings]

Julian: Hello? 

Alistair: How nice of you to stop drinking long enough to answer the phone.

Julian: Father. To what do I owe the displeasure of this call? 

Alistair: After I hang up, I want you and Rebecca to go into the library.

Julian: Are you starting a book club like Oprah? 

Alistair: I've arranged a video feed from the wedding to be sent directly to your television in the library. You and Rebecca will have a front-row seat watching Sheridan die.

Julian: I do not want to watch my sister die. 

Alistair: What was that, Julian? You were mumbling again. Come on, speak up like a man.

Julian: Father, do you know who sent the e-mail to the tabloid revealing that Ethan was Sam's son? 

Alistair: That's old news, Julian. My sources told me days ago it was Theresa.

Julian: Odd, isn't it? I thought she truly loved Ethan. Alistair: I don't give a whit about love or about Ethan, since Ivy's bastard is no longer a Crane. What happens to him has nothing to do with us. 

Rebecca's voice: That's what you think, Alistair.

Julian: Did you know that -- 

Alistair: Yes, yes, yes. Gwen put on the poisoned ring and almost died. That's why I called.

Rebecca: Oh, thank you for your concern, Alistair. 

Alistair: I'm not concerned. But you two should be. If you do anything to bollix Sheridan putting on that wedding ring, not only will she have to die some other horrible death, but I'll make certain you two suffer an equally painful demise. So for your sakes, Sheridan had better die today.

Tabitha: Isn't this a marvelous party, Timmy? Who says we can't have our cake and eat it too, huh?

Timmy: The cake was yummy.

Tabitha: I can't remember a better day.

Demon: Enjoy it, Tabitha. You won't be happy for long.

Tabitha: And why not?

Demon: Because your death draws nearer by the minute. Consider yourself warned.

Norma: Now, let's see. Where is it? Where is it? Ooh. Ooh. I'm sorry, father. Let's see. Ah. Here we are. "Tabitha Lenox and Timmy." From back east. Yeah, a town called Harmony. Oh. Well, Tabitha and Timmy of Harmony, you're about to have a visitor. It's time to prepare and look sharp. Oh.

Sam: Ethan, I just want to say thank you again for including Kay and Jessica in the wedding.

Ethan:, No, I'm glad to. You know, they're my half sisters. We're family now.

Sam: Yeah, look, I -- I hope we can get closer. I mean, we never really had a chance to sit down since what happened happened.

Ethan: I'd like that. How about first thing after the honeymoon?

Sam: Deal. And, Ethan, know that I wish you and Theresa the very best.

Ethan: Thanks. You know, it means a lot to me to have both my parents' support. I just wonder why my mother isn't here yet.

Sam: Well, her oldest son is getting married. This has got to be one of the biggest days of her life. She's probably taking a little extra time to look perfect for you and Theresa.

Ethan: Yeah, you're probably right. She wouldn't miss this for anything. She's probably so excited she's about to bust.

Ivy: Oh, Theresa is going to pay for hurting my son! As God is my witness, Theresa is going to pay!

Julian: We best get to the library. Father will be put out if we miss the ceremony.

Rebecca: We don't want that.

Julian: What else do you know about Theresa e-mailing the tabloid?

Rebecca: Well, I'm afraid I don't have anything else to tell you. Except for one thing. Ivy has a copy of the tabloid in her room. You see, that's what came for her in that envelope earlier. You see, I peeked. That's why I've been asking you if you've heard her scream.

Julian: Oh, my. Ivy's screams and gnashing of teeth will be the least of it. She'll kill Theresa. She'll -- she'll rip her limb from limb with her bare hands. Who knows -- my soon-to-be ex-wife may end up in prison for murder. I bet I wouldn't have to pay one penny of alimony.

Ivy: Hurt my son? Not while there is breath in my body! You are going to die, Theresa! You're going to die! [Ivy screams]

Rebecca: Oh. I guess Ivy saw the tabloid.

Julian: Yes. Now it's adios, Theresa.

Ivy: Die! Die! Die! 

Ethan: Sam, my -- my mother told me about your past together, how you two first met, that you saved her from drowning, and shortly after that, you fell deeply and passionately in love.

Sam: That's true.

Ethan: Well, I know my mother thought that maybe you two could get back together once everyone knew that you were my father.

Sam: Look, Ivy made her desire quite clear, but she knows now that I love Grace and I'll always love Grace.

Ethan: Look, I know it's awkward, but -- and like I said, I know about your past with my mother.

Sam: Ethan, is there something you're trying to ask me?

Ethan: Yeah. Yeah, there is. Look, the night I was conceived was my mother's wedding night to Julian. I just wanted to know how you felt about her then.

Sam: Look, I think I know what you're getting at here, all right? You have nothing to worry about. You were conceived in love, great love. And if Ivy would have married me instead of Julian, we'd still be married today because that's the way I feel about marriage -- it's forever. That's why I'll always be with Grace.

Ethan: That's how I feel about it, too.

Sam: Good. Protect your marriage. Protect it with everything you have. And if you ever think that anyone or anything is a threat to your marriage, you deal with it head-on.

Grace's voice: Maybe that's what my premonitions have been trying to tell me -- that David's a threat to my marriage. I am going to take Sam's advice to Ethan. I am going to deal with David before he causes any more trouble.

Ethan: We are definitely on the same page about marriage. I could never imagine leaving Theresa, and there's nothing she could do to make me stop loving her.

Chad: I don't know if Ethan and Theresa will be able to survive this.

Grace: I'm going to go talk to David.

Eve: No, Grace. Don't.

Grace: Eve, look, he won't talk to me in front of Sam, and I need to know what he's going to say, so I have to go alone.

Eve: What if he tries to hurt you?

Grace: He's locked in a jail cell. Come on, how is he going to hurt me?

Eve: There are other ways, Grace.

Grace: And I think he is a threat to my marriage, so I'm going to deal with this head-on. Now, please, I need you to cover for me. Don't tell Sam that I've --

Eve: No, no. Grace, I -- no.

Grace: Please, Eve? I need to do this.

Eve: All right.

Grace: Thanks. You know what? I'll be back before Sam even notices I'm gone.

Hank: Yo, Luis. Your best man needs the rings.

Luis: Yeah, the rings. Hank, I forgot the rings.

Miguel: Oh, my God.

Hank: I told you he'd freak out, didn't I?

Luis: Oh, you know, that's right. Sheridan has the rings. Yeah. No, she said she was going to give them to Gwen. Gwen's got them. Gwen.

Hank: Gwen's got them?

Luis: Yeah.

Hank: I'll go get them then, ok?

Luis: All right, thanks. Yeah, I'm telling you, it's a good thing nothing happened to those rings, or Sheridan would die.

Gwen: Charity? What is it?

Jessica: Did you have another premonition? [Knock on door]

Hank: It's Hank. I've come for the -- is something wrong?

Charity: No. Everything is fine.

Hank: Well, Luis sent me for the rings.

Gwen: Oh. Here.

Hank: Thanks. Theresa, does Ethan have your rings?

Theresa: Chad has them.

Hank: You sure? Now, we don't want you and Sheridan to get in front of Father Lonigan and having anything go wrong.

Theresa: I think everything is under control, Hank. Our wedding is going to go off without a hitch.

Rebecca: Julian, how did Alistair have someone come in here and do all this without you even knowing it?

Julian: My father can do anything he wants -- Even get me to kill my own sister.

Rebecca: Well, don't worry, pookie. Sheridan won't die alone. When Ivy gets to the church, she's going to kill Theresa.

Ivy: I am going to go to the church and kill Theresa! [telephone rings]

Timmy: Timmy wonders who that could be.

Tabitha: Our friend would have us believe that it was the grim reaper calling to say that we're dead meat.

Timmy: Lenox residence.

Norma: Is this Timmy?

Timmy: Yes. Who's this?

Norma: Oh, you don't recognize my voice, little man?

Timmy: It sounds familiar.

Norma: Oh, I'm an old friend of yours and Tabitha. And I'm coming to visit you. And while I'm there, we can exchange a few cutting remarks.

Norma: [Low voice] it's time to go to Harmony, Norma. [Normal voice] oh, yes, father. This will be a trip to dismember.

Father Lonigan: All the gentlemen participating in today's ceremony, will they please gather round?

Francisco: Father Lonigan, almost Everything is ready for the ceremony to begin.

Father Lonigan: All right, young men. It is time to take your places.

Francisco: We have all four wedding bouquets for Theresa and Sheridan.

Jessica: Why four?

Cristina: Well, four because during the ceremony, two of these are going to be given as gifts to the virgin Mary. And then afterwards, the other two will be tossed by our brides at the steps of the church.

Jessica: That is so cool. I just -- I love all these special traditions. Are you still upset by your premonition?

Charity: Yes.

Jessica: I'm sure it was nothing.

Charity: Ok. But it seemed so real. She was in such agony, Jessica.

Jessica: Charity, not all your premonitions come true, ok? Everything's fine, and it's going to be a beautiful wedding. Just try to relax and enjoy it.

Charity: Ok.

Jessica: Ok?

Charity: I'll try.

Jessica: All right.

Charity: I wish I could shake the feeling that something's wrong, but I can't. Something terrible is going to happen.

Ivy: Oh. God! Oh, Julian and his stick-it-to-me pranks! Oh, let me out! Somebody let me out of here! I have to get to the church and wring Theresa's neck!

Tabitha: Who was that on the phone, doll face?

Timmy: Timmy's not sure. They said they were old friends and that they were coming to visit.

Tabitha: Well, it must have been a wrong number. All my old friends are at least six feet under, if not deeper.

Demon: Beware, Tabitha.

Tabitha: Oh, not you again.

Demon: Don't ignore my warnings. You face doom, gloom, and kaboom.

Tabitha: Oh, be quiet, or I'll have to put a muzzle on you.

Demon: You can silence the messenger, but the message remains the same. You're done for, witch. [Demon laughs] [wind chimes ring] [moaning]

Timmy: That's Tabitha's voice! That's Timmy's princess crying out in pain!

Tabitha: Great goblins. So it is.

Timmy: Doom, gloom, and kaboom are coming to Harmony, and Timmy and Tabitha are doomed!

Norma: Oh, I'd be crazy to leave you alone, father. Of course you're going with me on this visit to Timmy and Tabitha in Harmony. [Low voice] that's my good little Norma. Always thinking ahead. [Normal voice] oh, thank you, father. That's why I'm packing all the necessities for the trip. I want to make sure when Tabitha and Timmy see me, they go to pieces.

Sam: Hey, where's Grace? The ceremony's ready to start.

Eve: Oh, she stepped out to speak to someone. I'm sure she'll be back soon.

Sam: Not soon enough. Things are really going well for us again.

T.C.: Glad to hear that.

Sam: Thanks, T.C. It's like Grace and I were lost in this dark tunnel but finally made it out on the other side. Left all that bad stuff behind us, except for that creep David Hastings stalking my wife.

T.C.: Man, what is up with him?

Sam: Look, I don't know, but I'm going to find out. The nerve of that guy -- insisting on meeting Grace alone. No way I'd never ok that.

Eve's voice: Oh, Grace. I just hope you're all right.

Officer: Hastings, you have a visitor.

David: Grace.

Grace: All right, I'm here, and I came alone.

David: So I see.

Grace: So it's just the two of us. Tell me what you wanted to say that you could only say in private.

Ethan: Tio Francisco. Hey, what's holding up the ceremony?

Francisco: It's your mother, Ethan. She hasn't arrived yet.

Ethan: You're kidding. What could possibly be keeping her?

Julian: Ivy -- I don't see her, do you?

Rebecca: No, I don't.

Julian: I wonder what's taking her so long to get to church.

Rebecca: Maybe she stopped to get ammo.

Ivy: Oh! Damn! The phone's still dead, thank you to Julian's juvenile antics. Oh. Somebody let me out of here! I have a bride to bludgeon to death!

Kay: I'm going to call Mrs.. Crane on the number you gave me to see what's keeping her, ok? [Telephone rings]

Ivy: Oh. Oh, no. Oh, that sounds like my cell phone. Oh, no. They're probably trying to call me from the church. I can't believe I left my cell phone on the hall table.

Kay: Mrs. Crane isn't answering her cell phone.

Jessica: Pilar, I called the number that you gave me for Mrs.  Crane's private line, but there's no answer.

Whitney: You know, why don't I go talk to Ethan and see if he knows where Ivy is, ok? Sheridan: You know, I'm sure Ivy's on her way and she just forgot to turn her cell phone on.

Theresa: Yeah, I'm sure she'll be here soon. And I'm sure of something else, mama. She is going to be the best mother-in-law a girl could have.

Ivy: I have to get to the church and warn Ethan. He can't marry Theresa because I am going to kill her. You are dead, Theresa. You're dead, dead, dead.

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