OLTL Transcript Friday 11/11/11

One Life to Live Transcript Friday 11/11/11


Episode # 11064

Provided By Suzanne
Proofread By Gisele

Tina: Finally! I was afraid you were gonna miss the happiest night of your life! You don't want to be late for your own wedding, do you?

Bo: [Sighs] I know. I only show up when times are tough, huh? Bet you're thinking, "What's with this guy? I mean, why the nerve coming to ask me for favors?" But, uh -- I'll make you a deal. Don't do this for me. Do it for my wife. Just please bring Matthew back to us because -- if you give him his life back -- maybe Nora will get her life back, too.

Shaun: Mm, mm, mm. Is that legal?

Vivian: What?

Shaun: You wearing that dress. I don't know if anybody's gonna notice the bride.

Vivian: Natalie is gonna be gorgeous. This is her day, hers and Brody's, so to the bride and groom.

Shaun: Everybody loves a wedding.

Vivian: Mm-hmm.

Shaun: So, what do think about having one of your own?

Vivian: Um -- [Clears throat]

Rex: Look, can we make this quick? I was on my way to the church when you called, and I don't want to be late. Uh, if this is about the money transfer, can we talk after the wedding?

Clint: I'm sorry, Rex. This -- this can't wait. I need a favor.

Jessica: I'm sorry. I know that you were shooting that video.

Ford: No, don't worry about it. I mean, probably wouldn't have finished it tonight anyway.

Jessica: I just needed to talk to someone.

Ford: Yeah, I know. I-I get it. Tonight's the night, uh, Brody and Natalie are getting married.

Jessica: No, it's not that. It's -- everything that Natalie said to me -- and Brody, too.

Ford: All right. Just start at the beginning.

Jessica: Ha, I wish I could. I wish I could turn back the clock so I never found that paternity test to begin with.

Brody: I got to get rid of that paternity test, but I got to find it first. Where is that stupid dog? Come here, you little mongrel.

Cord: What little mongrel?

Tina: David Vickers, what have you got there? Oh, honey, that's not yours. No. This is Natalie's, okay? Oh, I'm -- I'm sorry. She has this habit of -- of taking things that aren't hers. But, you know, it's -- it's okay. She didn't hurt it. So, um, let's, um -- well, t-the limo's coming any second, so let's get you dressed. Natalie, what's wrong? Are -- are you okay?

Natalie: I, uh, I had to -- I had to say goodbye to John.

Roxanne: Johnny, I'm not leaving without you, so unless you want me to break down this door, you better answer it! You're not in there.

John: No, I'm pretty sure I'm out here watching a semi-crazy lady trying to destroy her own property.

Roxanne: Well, this crazy lady wants to give you the chance of a lifetime.

John: Winning lottery ticket?

Roxanne: No, wise guy. The chance to tell Natalie that she's marrying the wrong guy. Are you in or not?

Nora: You talking about me behind my back?

Bo: You heard?

Nora: Well, it's not every day that somebody pleads my case to the highest of the high courts. Thank you.

Bo: I'm not real sure that the ruling will be in our favor, though.

Nora: Well, every little bit helps.

Bo: Hmm.

Nora: I logged in some time at the synagogue, and you don't want to know how long that's been. I thought I'd have to come up with a name tag or God wouldn't remember me.

Bo: [Chuckles] He's not gonna forget you after all the times you went after him for, uh, falling down on the job.

Nora: I want to rid the world of injustice. Is that too much to ask?

Bo: No. Right now, I'd settle for our son opening his eyes, though.

Nora: It could still happen.

Bo: You're damn right. I'm sorry. I meant to say "You're darn right."

Nora: No, he didn't.

Bo: You know, we were standing up there on that altar not long ago.

Nora: Hmm.

Bo: Can you believe that?

Nora: And now here we are in the strangest limbo, Matthew in the hospital and -- a grandchild about to be born.

Bo: Wasn't part of the plan on our wedding day -- that's for sure.

Vivian: Um, a wedding of my own? I-I hadn't really, um, thought about it.

Shaun: You haven't? Like, really?

Vivian: Um, we're -- we're talking about you and me, right?

Shaun: Yeah, well, I didn't think that you were planning on marrying anyone else.

Vivian: [Chuckles] No. I-I-I'm sorry. You know, it just -- it caught me off guard.

Shaun: Why? I mean, we're heading to a wedding. That's when people talk about it, right? I mean, we've been living together for a while now.

Vivian: And it's been great, so why fix something that's not broken? We should probably get to the church, don't you think?

Shaun: Viv -- how come every time I talk about getting married, you change the subject?

Vivian: That's not true. [Sighs] All right. Look, t-there's, like, talking, and then there's talking. I mean -- is this a proposal?

Shaun: If it was, what would you say?

Vivian: Uh -- I would probably say no.

Clint: I was hoping to walk my daughter down the aisle tonight, but looks like that's not in the cards. So I was hoping -- would you do the honors?

Rex: You want me to give Natalie away?

Clint: Well, you're her brother. And over the years, I've noticed that she's quite fond of you.

Rex: Uh, you sure you're okay with this?

Clint: Rex, we're family. I'd be proud to have you take my place.

Viki: Well, well, well. That's a lovely sight.

Clint: Well, it looks like I am covered. While I'm watching the ceremonies on my laptop, he is gonna be walking Natalie down the aisle.

Viki: No, actually, he's not.

Clint: Yeah, he is. We just decided.

Viki: I know what you decided. It was a lovely decision. But it's not necessary.

Ford: So you ended up telling Brody, too?

Jessica: Oh, I didn't have to. Natalie had already told him. But that didn't stop me from filling in all the details, as if it wasn't enough to be called a spiteful bitch by Natalie and have her threaten to punch my face in. [Sighs]

Ford: So, what exactly did Brody say to you?

Jessica: He said what he knew would hurt me the most. He called me crazy.

Brody: I was looking for Tina's dog.

Cord: David Vickers? Why?

Brody: Well, I'm missing something, and you know how dogs are. They like to pick things up and bury them.

Cord: Yeah, I wouldn't be surprised if that's exactly what happened. Uh, don't tell Tina I told you this, but that little spoiled mutt of hers will pick up just about anything that isn't nailed down. Uh, what have you lost?

Brody: Uh, my -- boutonniere for the wedding. I-I-I think she might have eaten it, so I was -- have you seen her?

Cord: This it right here?

Brody: [Scoffs] Thanks. Yeah. I-I can't believe I missed that.

Cord: [Laughs] It's okay to be a little jumpy. Wedding jitters, right? Unless it's something else.

Tina: Natalie, your eyes look a little puffy. Do you have any cucumbers?

Natalie: No. I'm allergic.

Tina: Honey, I wasn't talking about eating them. I was -- o-okay. Never mind. We'll just skip to step number five.

Natalie: Oh, can't we just skip to the step where you just give me some time alone, please?

Tina: Honey, a lot of planning has gone into this wedding. I-I mean, if we get behind, we are never gonna catch up. We have to stay on schedule, okay? So, um, what happened with John? Did, um, did you tell him that 'cause you're marrying somebody else, you two just have to stick to police business or what?

Natalie: No. No, I said goodbye to him like we were saying goodbye for good, like we were never gonna see each other again.

Roxanne: So, I text you, and you don't text me back, and I call you, and you don't pick up the phone. So, here we are, and we are face to face.

John: Mm-hmm.

Roxanne: And I want to know, do you want to be my date to Nattie's wedding?

John: I didn't get an invite.

Roxanne: Hey. I'm the mother of the bride. I got so much pull that I can get you a front-row seat so that when you stand up and you say that you're nuts about Nattie, you don't even have to yell. Listen, somebody's got to shake some sense into her, and I can't do it because I promised Rexy, so it's got to be you.

John: I'm sorry, Rox. I got a plane to catch.

Roxanne: Oh, you're going on a vacation? One of those all-intrusive resorts?

John: I'm, uh -- I'm moving. To Seattle. I leave tonight.

[Door closes]

Tina: Seattle? Why is John moving so far away?

Natalie: He says, um, because his brother lives there, and he wants to get to know his nephew a little bit better. But I don't believe him. I don't believe him. I think that he's moving because of me. I think that he wants to put as much distance between us as he possibly can, which makes me feel terrible.

Tina: Why? Because you fear you pushed him away or because you're gonna miss him?

Natalie: Both. I just don't understand. I mean, why would he go to such extreme measures if he didn't have feelings for me?

Tina: Well, he probably still does.

Natalie: But he denies it.

Tina: Well, do you think he's lying?

Natalie: I-I think that I shouldn't care. I mean, I'm getting married to someone else, and you know what? I just -- I -- the thought of John being gone for good, it's -- [Sighs] It's just overwhelming.

Tina: Well, yeah, I mean, you -- I mean, you two almost got married. I mean, you -- you clearly meant a lot to each other.

Natalie: For a long time.

Tina: It's not too late. You don't have to go through this wedding if you don't want to. There's still time to call it off.

Bo: You know, Pa always said that any problem could be solved with brains, guts, and hard work. I know that, and I'm ready. I know you're ready, too. We -- we work night and day, but, uh, it really wouldn't matter because there's nothing that we can do.

Nora: We can pray. And you're actually pretty good at it, I have to say.

Bo: So, you're happy that you married me, huh?

Nora: Yes.

Roxanne: You can't just pick up and bail on your job. I mean, what's Bo gonna say?

John: Bo knows. We worked it out.

Roxanne: W-w-well, what about rent? You know, you gave me all of November's rent, and you know my policy. No refunds.

John: I know. I know. Got to have your hat money, you know, but, um, well, I'm gonna have to live with that. But I'm gonna live with Michael and Marcie for a little while, so it should all work out in the end. You should have got the bigger one.

Roxanne: Thanks. This is just unbelievable. What about Nattie? I mean, she's gonna flip!

John: Natalie knows, too. We said our goodbyes.

Roxanne: You said your goodbyes, and you didn't tell her how you feel about her?

John: Yeah. Natalie is marrying someone else, Roxy. It's a little late for that.

Cord: You know, a lot of guys get spooked right at the big moment, but you still seem pretty tense.

Brody: I guess. It's just -- you don't know how much we've had to go through to get to this point. There's been stuff with Jessica and Natalie, stuff with Jessica and me. I just don't want there to be any more stuff, not when we're this close.

Cord: I can understand that. But listen, you're at the finish line, right? You've been through all this, okay? It's gonna be just fine.

Ford: All right, listen, we -- we can get back to Brody in a second. Did you say that Natalie threatened to hit you?

Jessica: You know, the funny thing is, she was so nice to me when I got there. She even invited me to her wedding.

Ford: Would you have gone?

Jessica: [Chuckles] Well, it doesn't matter now because the second that I told her that Liam might be John's son, she turned on me. She even accused me of making the whole thing up to keep her from being happy, and I would never do something like that.

Ford: I know.

Jessica: [Scoffs] You know, if only I had that stupid test, you know, then -- then she would have to believe me. Who knows what that sneaky, little dog did with it.

Natalie: No, no. I can't. I'm not stopping the wedding today. I mean, Brody and I have -- have been looking forward to this for -- for weeks. I mean, I'm not gonna let John ruin this for us.

Tina: Okay, as long as you're doing what's right for you.

Natalie: John had his chance. Honestly, had he come to me and said that he loved me, I -- I would have had to rethink everything. But he didn't, so forget it. You know, it's not like John can just come and stop my wedding at the last minute -- and neither can Jessica.

Tina: Jessica? What -- what did she do?

Natalie: You really want to hear the story? I mean, 'cause it -- it's scary. I'm not kidding.

Tina: Yeah. What happened?

Natalie: Okay, well, um, Jessica came to me with this whacked-out story that -- that John is really Liam's father and Brody isn't. I mean, it was just -- it was so --

David Vickers: [Barking] [Growling]

Tina: David Vickers, what's wrong?

David Vickers: [As Tina] What's wrong with me? What's wrong with you two? What Jessica said is true, you nitwits!

Vivian: Don't misunderstand, Shaun.

Shaun: Oh, I understand. You don't want to marry me.

Vivian: No, I-it's not about you.

Shaun: It is if I'm the one who's doing the asking.

Vivian: I have a problem with marriage in general, a-and that's because of my parents, not because of you. They were so unhappy, Shaun. They were always bickering and always complaining, and like a lot of people, they stayed together for the kids, but I really wish they hadn't.

Shaun: It wouldn't be that way with us. We love each other.

Vivian: Yes, we do, and I have never been as happy as I am with you, so why do we have to change anything?

Shaun: We don't have to, but I was hoping you wanted to. I guess deep down, I'm traditional.

Vivian: And I guess I'm kind of not. So, what does this mean? If I don't change, and I don't get onboard with the marriage train, that you'll just leave me?

Shaun: I'm not ready to say that.

Vivian: Shaun, listen. I don't need a ceremony to tell me how I feel. I know how I feel. With you, I have found where I belong. I don't ever want to look for anyone else.

Shaun: Me neither.

Vivian: Good. Because your little sister is gonna need us, both of us when she has this baby, and we have got to be solid.

Shaun: I know.

Vivian: Okay, so can we just stick with the status quo? I mean, things have been working really good, haven't they? So can that just be enough for now?

Shaun: Sure. For now.

Nora: Where you going?

Bo: I just remembered something.

Nora: What?

Bo: That I am still a lucky husband and a soon-to-be grandpa, so what do you say, Granny? Want to struggle? Come on.

Nora: [Laughs]

Bo: Come on. Let's stand by ourselves, and we'll dance.

Nora: Here?

Bo: Yeah. Why not here? What better place? This is where we swore our love to each other forever.

Nora: Oh.

Bo: Oh.

[Both laugh]

Bo: Oh, I do love you, red, just as much as I ever did, as much as I did when we boogied down this aisle together and Little Richard up there pronounced us husband and wife.

Nora: [Laughs]

Bo: I love you, and that'll never stop.

Nora: Me either. Never, ever, ever. Unless you call me Granny again, in which case, I'm gonna kill you with my bare hands.

[Both laugh]

Bo: That's my girl.

Nora: [Laughs]

Viki: I just received an e-mail from Dorian, which I'm actually going to frame.

Clint: Are you sure you're not gonna burn it?

Viki: Ooh, you are so judgmental, and you are gonna be very sorry you said that. "Dear Viki, I may not care for Clint, but since you obviously do, I made a few calls. Here's a little gift from Pennsylvania's newly elected junior senator -- special dispensation so that Clint can attend his daughter's wedding."

Clint: Oh! [Laughs]

Viki: Told you you'd be sorry. Isn't that wonderful?

Clint: Oh, yes!

Rex: Guess I just lost my job.

Viki: Oh.

Clint: Yeah, I think you did. I'm sorry about that, Rex.

Rex: Oh, please. This is the best gift Natalie's ever got. Her father's gonna walk her down the aisle.

Clint: Thank you, son.

Rex: Of course. I've already gotten booted as best man. I'm getting used to it.

Clint: [Chuckles]

Rex: I'm gonna head over to the church, see if Natalie and Brody need anything.

Viki: We'll see you over there. Well, what are you waiting for? There's a tuxedo upstairs. Just came back from the cleaners.

Clint: [Laughs]

Jessica: [Sighs] Why did I think that I could tell Natalie something that big without having the evidence to back it up?

Ford: Because you were trying to do the right thing for your sister. And you were hoping that she would know that without some piece of paper. You did the best thing you could, Jessica.

Jessica: Yeah, well, Brody called me borderline delusional, said that I should get help because he was worried about me having a relapse.

Ford: What the hell? He knows how hard you've worked to get better. We all do. H-how could he hurt you like that?!

Jessica: Funny thing is, I don't know what's worse -- Brody thinking I'm crazy or Natalie just thinking that I'm evil.

Ford: They're both wrong. You are the strongest person I know, Jessica. Strong enough to take this -- this huge risk because you don't want your sister to make a mistake. You don't deserve any of this at all. And Brody should have known that.

Cord: Well, you don't have to worry, my friend. Today, the groom doesn't have to worry about a whole lot. It's the bride that has to sweat every single detail. And I got to tell you, Tina did it. She pulled it off. She pulled it all together.

Brody: Well, I'm not really worried about the ceremony.

Cord: Well, don't worry about all that happily-ever-after stuff. That'll all work out. Just get through today. [Laughs] You know, Tina and I, we've been through three different weddings. I know you guys can make it through one.

Brody: [Chuckles]

Cord: And then that other stuff, you and Natalie have already got a huge jump-start on that -- that beautiful, little baby. That's the stuff that's gonna keep you guys together. Those are the bonds that are never gonna be broken your whole lives. That's what makes it stronger.

Viki: Okay, I have great news.

Brody: What's up?

Viki: Clint is going to be able to come to the wedding after all.

Cord: [Laughs] Hey! How'd that happen?

Viki: Well, Senator Dorian Lord made it happen.

Brody: Dorian?

Viki: Oh, yeah. It's a long story, and we don't have time for that now, because we have a wedding to get to.

Cord: Ooh, yes. Oh, and we better get moving.

Viki: Cord, would you give me just one moment with my future son-in-law, please?

Cord: Absolutely.

Viki: Thanks.

Cord: I'll see you outside.

Brody: I'll be right there.

Viki: Brody, this is traditionally the moment when I ask you to take good care of my daughter, but I don't have to do that, because you've already done that. You are such a good man, and you've taken such good care of Natalie and Liam. And while this wedding may not be the one that we expected, I couldn't ask for a better husband for my daughter or a better father for my grandson.

Roxanne: I know Nattie is marrying someone else, but you got to ask yourself why, and we both know the reason. It's because of the kid. It's because Nattie and Brody want the kid to have the two-car, picket fence, perfect garage.

John: And what's wrong with that?

Roxanne: Oh, nothing, unless Nattie is in love with somebody else.

John: Please, don't start that again, all right? It's not about me stopping the wedding. It's not about me at all. It's about that little boy. And Natalie and Brody and Liam are trying to start a family together.

Roxanne: Well, maybe they shouldn't be!

John: Hey, they already are. They're just making it official tonight, all right? It's done, Roxy, and nothing gives me the right to interfere with that.

David Vickers: [As Tina] How can humans be so clueless? John McBain is little Liam's father! [Enunciating] Read my lips!

Tina: I-I don't know what's wrong with David Vickers. She's usually not this vocal.

David Vickers: [As Tina] Oh, I'm vocal, all right, but you won't listen! [Barks]

Tina: You know, she's probably just jealous that the bride-to-be is getting all of the attention.

[Both chuckle]

Tina: Now, David Vickers, you get ahold of yourself. Okay. Now, where did Jessica get this crazy idea that John was Liam's father?

Natalie: Oh, she saw a "document," the paternity test.

David Vickers: [As Tina] That's right. She did see a paternity test. It was in a box of Victor Lord's stuff, and I took it! Okay, fine. If I have to prove it, I have to prove it.

Tina: Well, where did this document come from?

Natalie: That's the kicker. She said that the one who found the paternity test was --

Tina: [Gasps] David Vickers! She's gone! [Sighs]

Roxanne: Who says you don't got a right to interfere? A guy who's in love's got rights up the wazoo. So you just got to tell Nattie exactly how you feel before it's too late.

John: I think you're the one's gonna be late. Shouldn't you be at the church, Roxy?

Roxanne: Don't you start telling me what to do.

John: Likewise, Rox.

Roxanne: Listen, I shouldn't have listened to Rexy. I should have just told Natalie, and this wedding would have been called off, and then you wouldn't be going off to Seattle. And by the way, there's a lot of participation there, you know.

John: What participation?

Roxanne: Well, as a weather guy would say, that means rain, and there's an awful lot of it. And you're gonna hate it.

[Both laugh]

Nora: Oh!

Bo: Oh! Hey, Balsom.

Rex: Sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt.

Nora: No, it's okay. We were just, you know -- [Chuckles]

Rex: No, I know. It's nice to see you guys happy. You deserve it.

Bo: Well, we were, uh, reminiscing, you know, about our wedding and --

Rex: Yeah, I remember watching you guys dance that night -- thinking how much I want that someday -- with me and Gigi.

Nora: Rex, honey, are you sure you're up for this, you know, a wedding so soon after --

Rex: Oh, yeah. I'm up for it. Gigi would want me to be here for Natalie -- and the rest of my family.

Viki: You always did look so handsome in a tuxedo.

Clint: Ah. And the best part is, can't see the ankle monitor.

Viki: Has it been reset?

Clint: Oh, yeah.

Viki: Good.

Clint: Llanview Police were here to reset it, because we don't want alarms going off in the middle of the ceremony.

Viki: No, we don't.

Clint: Would you look at the mother of the bride?

Viki: Oh.

Clint: Viki, you have never looked more beautiful.

Viki: Thank you. Thank you.

Clint: I will be the one doing the thanking tonight, all right? Because you got to Dorian, I won't be sitting in there watching the wedding on my laptop.

Viki: Oh, I'm gonna send her flowers when we get home.

Clint: No, come on now. She may have done a little politics, but you're the one who made it happen. And I will never, ever forget that. So, are you ready to walk our girl down the aisle?

Viki: Oh, yeah.

Clint: [Chuckles]

Viki: And are you ready to step outside this house for the first time in months?

Clint: I thought you'd never ask.

Viki: Okay. Oh, thank you.

Clint: Yeah.

Viki: Thank you.

Roxanne: So, I'd like to make a toast. It's Irish, I think. May the road always rise up -- I don't know, something about your back. May you always have the monkey on your back.

John: To the monkey.

Roxanne: No. To you, Johnny. To Seattle, to hating it and to turning around and coming right back. [Sighs] No. Uh, no. Listen, baby, I want you to have a good life. [Sniffles] I'd like you to meet a-a great woman and have a bunch of great kids.

John: Thanks, Rox.

Roxanne: But you'll never meet a girl like my Nattie.

Tina: I looked outside. I looked in the hallway. I can't find David Vickers anywhere.

Natalie: It's gonna be okay, Tina. You're gonna find her --

[Cell phone rings]

Natalie: Hold on one second. Hold on. Hold on. Hello? Oh, okay. Um, thanks. Sorry. Thank you. I'll be right down. It was the limo. Um, it's downstairs. I really got to get to the church.

Tina: Oh. Yeah. Right. Uh -- I-I-I need a minute to finish getting ready.

Natalie: You know what? No, Tina. You -- you can't leave, not while David Vickers is still missing.

Tina: No, I-I have to. I-I can't let you down.

Natalie: You haven't. Honestly, with as much work as you've done, I mean, you -- [Sighs] You really have been great.

Tina: Yeah, but I'm -- I'm the maid of honor. I made a promise, and I have to see this through. I mean, I have a lot to make up to you.

Natalie: No. You know what? I am gonna go find a maid of honor, and you are gonna stay here and find your little doggie.

Tina: Really? Y-you don't mind?

Natalie: No. Not at all.

Tina: Well, I will be there as soon as possible. I promise. Hey, and don't forget, when it comes time to take your vows, say, "I, Natalie, take you, Brody."

Jessica: Thanks for sticking up for me, but, you know, I can't actually blame Brody. You know, I told him that I got the paternity test from a dog and the reason I couldn't show it to him is because the dog stole it back. That sounds borderline delusional.

Ford: Except the only problem is, it's true.

Jessica: No, it doesn't matter. I mean, the wedding's gonna start any minute, and I told everyone that matters.

Ford: Well, not everyone. You haven't told John that Liam could be his son. And, uh, speaking from experience, I-I think he deserves to know.

Roxanne: Vik, you've done this lots of times before, so let me know if I mess up.

Viki: Yeah, actually, there's nothing to it, Roxanne. As mothers of the bride, all we have to do is smile and cry.

Roxanne: Oh, I can do that.

Viki: [Laughs]

Roxanne: By the way, what the hell is he doing here?

Bo: If you cut that ankle monitor off, I don't want to know about it.

Clint: No. [Chuckles] I'm here because I got a legal dispensation.

Bo: How legal?

Clint: Ask your daughter-in-law. She's the one who's throwing around her weight.

Nora: Dorian?

Clint: Yeah. Dorian. I never thought that I would thank Dorian for anything, but she gives me no choice. Outside, there's a guard who drove us over here. He's also gonna stick around to make sure that I don't make a break for it, and I did not bring my shotgun to this one.

Nora: Oh, we're so glad. And we're also glad you didn't have to miss this.

Clint: Nobody's as glad as I am.

Roxanne: So, is Shane gonna be here?

Rex: Uh, no, not tonight. He's in Pittsburgh rocking it with the school band.

Roxanne: Oh, right. I think he's getting better. And as a matter of fact, I think you're getting better, too.

Shaun: Looking sharp, you two.

Roxanne: Oh, not as sharp-looking as you, dude. You are gonna make one great-looking bridegroom. And you are gonna be a hot bride. Isn't she, Rex?

Rex: Yeah. You know, tonight's about Natalie and Brody, so --

Roxanne: Oh. Okay. Well, I thought this was a good warm-up for you. So, when are you making it legal?

Shaun: We don't have any plans for that right now, Roxy. Actually, we're not thinking about it at all.

Roxanne: What's going on today? Why is everybody so touchy?

Cord: All right, trust me. They're gonna be here any second.

Brody: Who?

Cord: The bride and the maid of honor. Who do you think I meant?

Brody: [Chuckles] Yeah.

John: Asa McBain. That's a big name for a little man.

Natalie: A king. Only the best for our little guy. Isn't that right, your highness? Dad?!

Clint: Hey!

Natalie: I thought --

Clint: Yeah, I thought the same thing, but, uh, you know, it was a nice surprise for both of us.

Natalie: Yeah!

Clint: So, in a few minutes, would you care to take a stroll down the aisle with your old man?

Natalie: I -- this is -- I mean, yeah. I mean, I-I-I just don't understand. How did you make this happen?

Clint: Well, we'll explain all the details later on, but, uh, right now, you can thank your mother for getting the ball rolling.

Natalie: Oh, Mommy. Thank you so much. This is the best wedding gift.

Viki: It is. It's amazing.

Natalie: Yeah.

Viki: And you look beautiful.

Natalie: Thank you.

Viki: Absolutely lovely.

Roxanne: Ditto on that. That dress is a knockout.

Viki: Okay, where's Tina?

Natalie: Oh, yeah. Um, long story. We're gonna start without her.

Roxanne: No way. You're not starting this wedding without your maid of honor.

Tina: [Sighs] Oh, David Vickers, you naughty, little girl. You're gonna make me miss this wedding. Do you realize that? I mean, I already checked with the neighbors. Nobody knows where you are. [Sighs] Come back, please, little David Vickers. Please come back.

David Vickers: [As Tina] Here we go. I just hope that paternity test is where I left it. Are you kidding me? How am I supposed to reach that knob?

Cord: Hey, Tina. Are you here in the church?

Tina: I wish. Unfortunately, I had to stay behind 'cause little David Vickers is missing again.

Cord: Have you never heard of a leash, Tina?

Tina: Look, I will be there as soon as I possibly can. I promise. I love you.

Cord: Yeah, I love you, too. I hate for you to miss this.

Tina: [Sighs] I hate this, too. I mean, we should be there together. I mean, to see this beautiful wedding that I planned with virtually no help from anybody else. But -- but I can't leave till I know that little David Vickers is safe. I mean, she's just a poor, innocent, little animal. I just pray that God will bring her home again.

David Vickers: [As Tina] Finally. I'm getting too old for this. I've got to get my paws on that paternity test before it's too late!

Roxanne: What are you gonna do, Nattie? Your cockamamie maid of honor still isn't here.

Clint: Oh, for heaven's sakes. I'll see if I can get ahold of her.

Natalie: [Sighs]

Viki: You know what? Roxy, why don't you do it?

Roxanne: Me?

Viki: Uh-huh. I mean, if that's all right with you.

Natalie: Yeah. Yeah. That would be great. [Chuckles]

Viki: Good. Okay. Problem solved.

Roxanne: Okay. If that's what you want.

Natalie: [Laughs]

Roxanne: Okay, then, as your maid of honor, can I ask you one teeny-weeny, little question?

Natalie: Sure.

Roxanne: Is this what you really want? You really want to be Mrs. Brody Lovett?

Natalie: Of course. I wouldn't be here if I didn't, right?

Roxanne: Okay. Then what if --

[Soft music plays]

Natalie: T-t-that's your cue. That's your cue. You got to go. Go, go, go, go, go!

Roxanne: What do I do? What do I do?

Natalie: Just go!

Roxanne: O-okay.

Jessica: You're right. If there's any chance that Liam is John's son, he has a right to know. I-I understand why you would feel that way, considering what happened with Ryder.

Ford: Yeah.

Jessica: But, Ford, what if it's not true? I would just be getting John's hopes up for nothing. I mean, what if Liam isn't his son?

Ford: Jessica -- what if he is?

Clint: This is one of the proudest moments of my life.

Natalie: [Giggles] And you are the best wedding gift ever.

["Bridal Chorus" plays]

Minister: Dearly beloved, we are gathered before God and his witnesses to join this man and this woman in holy matrimony.

[Telephone rings]

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