OLTL Transcript Tuesday 3/22/11

One Life to Live Transcript Tuesday 3/22/11


Episode # 10899

Provided By Suzanne
Proofread By Kathy

Brody on baby monitor: Sleep, my child and peace attend thee all through the night midnight slumber close surround me all through the night soft the drowsy hours are creeping hill and vale in slumber sleeping I my loved ones' watch am keeping all through the night you like that, Liam? I've been working on it for a while now. Don't tell anyone. I haven't had a chance to sing it for your cousin Ryder yet, but I will. When he comes home. With his mom.

Natalie: If they come home.

Ford: Hey, Cris, have you seen Tess?

Cristian: She ditched you already, huh?

Ford: What are you talking about?

Cristian: Dude, Tess is an escape artist. You can't turn your back on her for a second.

[Engine starts]

Tess: What are you waiting for? Let's go.

Cutter: Beg your pardon?

Tess: Come on, stud. Let's rock and roll.

Cutter: Me and you?

Tess: You and me and my dipstick husband if you don't step on it. If you do this, I'll make it so worth your while.

Kelly: I really think it's gonna be okay.

Joey: I hope so.

Rama: You know, I may be new to your country and your customs, but it looks to me like you may want to tighten your grip on your husband.

Echo: Okay, stop pounding on the door. I told you I'd get you the rent tomorrow. Friday at the-- Chuckles.

Dorian: David? Oh, you want to play hide and go seek. I get it. Come out, come out, wherever you are. Sugar lips!

[Knocking on door]

Dorian: Viki.

Viki: Yes, apparently sugar lips has left the building.

David: Hello, Uncle Clint. You and I have a score to settle.

Clint: I was wondering when you were gonna show your face.

David: I came as soon as I could. Don't you worry. It shouldn't take long. One shot ought to do it.

Dorian: I've got two questions for you. What are you doing in my bedroom and what have you done with David?

Viki: Your maid told me to come up. I didn't see any harm in it since you feel free to let yourself into Llanfair whenever you please.

Dorian: What has happened to David?

Viki: Well, I think this note might explain it. I found it on the floor. It must have fallen down.

Dorian: "Dorian, love of my life, sorry to bed and run, but I have an important job to do. Back in a jif. David."

Viki: There, you see? He won't be long.

Dorian: Unless he has been snatched again.

Viki: No. No, Dorian, no.

Dorian: I suppose you heard what happened to David, where he has been the last few months.

Viki: Yes. The whole detestable story came out at Ryder's custody hearing.

Dorian: Right. That Clint forged that letter--the one that said that David was leaving me at the altar. For all we know, Clint also forged this one, too.

Viki: Dorian, no. Bo is actually having Clint watched. Besides, at this point, I think it's very unlikely that David is in any danger from Clint.

Clint: What the hell is this?

David: It's the wrong end of your shotgun, Uncle Clint. I know you're not accustomed to seeing it from this angle, but first time for everything. Actually, the last.

Clint: Nigel! Get this intruder out of here.

David: Nigel? Nigel can't help you.

Clint: Why? What did you do to him?

David: I didn't do anything to him. He's where he always is at this hour--in his burrow under his afghan watching "Access Llanview." Which means nobody knows I'm here.

Clint: So? Now what?

David: Now I get payback.

Dorian: I just got David back. I'm not gonna lose him again.

Viki: I'm assuming your reunion was a success.

Dorian: Oh. Yes, indeed it was. Though I must admit, entre nous, that it did not begin quite so auspiciously.

Viki: Really? What was the problem?

Dorian: A little misunderstanding about what went on the past few months, who did what to whom, but luckily, we cleared the whole thing up and we've refound our bliss together.

Viki: I'm very, very happy for you, really. You know, it never made sense to me that David just vanished off of your wedding like that. He loves you and I knew that, despite how bad it looked.

Dorian: So you said. So in fact you get to say "I told you so" now. Go ahead. Really. Take advantage of the fact that I'm on such a pink cloud.

Viki: No, Dorian. I'm not going to do that. I just--I will congratulate you. I'm delighted that you're this happy. I just wish everyone were.

Echo: I'm surprised to see you.

Charlie: You want me to go?

Echo: No. No. I'm glad you're here.

Charlie: You don't sound so sure.

Echo: Well, I am. It's just every time I see you, I can't help wondering if it's gonna be the last time. These days, my M.O. is to keep my expectations low. It's the only way I think I can survive this.

Charlie: Echo...

Echo: Charlie, I've loved you for a long time, not just since I came here to Llanview. So it's just a little hard for me to believe that you're here now with me, when you should be with--

Charlie: Believe it.

Tess: Come on. Are we getting out of here or what?

Cutter: I am, without you.

Tess: Don't you want to get to know me better?

Cutter: I know plenty about you from my sister, and you, Jessica--

Tess: Tess.

Cutter: Yeah, I was about to say crazy.

Tess: Well, don't limit yourself. Crazy can mean a lot of different things.

Cutter: Most of them bad.

Tess: Some of them mind-blowingly awesome. Don't tell me you're not interested. You're not gay, are you?

Cutter: No. No. I'm not gay.

Tess: Okay, well, then put the pedal to the metal. I have a lot to offer a hunky heterosexual man.

Kelly's voice: David's back. How's Dorian? She throw something at him?

Cutter's voice: I wouldn't know. David threw me out.

Kelly's voice: Looks like you're gonna have to find another heiress to cozy up to.

Ford: Tess! Tess, where are you?

Tess: Crap. Thanks for nothing. Think of all the fun we could've had.

Rama: You know what? Maybe we should go somewhere else. Give Joey and Kelly some time on their own. Come on.

Aubrey: Oh, my gosh. Look who's here.

Joey: Hey, Aubrey. I thought you were at home with-- oh, and you brought Rama with you.

Aubrey: And I thought you were out looking for Tess, but I don't see her anywhere.

Kelly: What are you talking about? Tess is talking with Ford.

Aubrey: You were saying?

Tess: Ugh. Fine. At least help me smear my lipstick. It'll drive the old ball and chain crazy. Never mind. What are you doing?

Cutter: Not limiting myself.

[Tires screech]

Ford: Hey. Hey, hey, where are you going?

Aubrey: So was Tess actually here or did someone want a little company?

Joey: Aubrey, she was here. I tried talking to her, but I couldn't get through. She must've taken off.

Kelly: Not before she insulted Joey. It was pretty brutal.

Aubrey: Well, thank you for consoling my husband, Kelly. I'll take it from here.

Joey: I thought you were back at the house helping Rama get settled.

Kelly: Settled?

Joey: Yeah. Aubrey invited Rama to come stay with us at Dad's.

Aubrey: She just needs help getting back on her feet now that Vimal's in prison.

Kelly: I guess it makes sense. The two of you would be very close after your days at L'ecole Madame Laurent. In fact, I remember Rama having quite the social circle, but I don't remember you being a part of it. Then again, I don't really remember you being there at all.

Aubrey: Well, you did flunk out early.

Kelly: Oh, they kicked me out.

Aubrey: My mistake.

Joey: And besides, it doesn't really surprise me that you wouldn't remember Aubrey. Rama told me that she looked a lot different back then.

Kelly: Oh. You don't say.

Cutter: Home sweet home.

Tess: Uh, I thought that you were staying at the Palace.

Cutter: Not anymore.

Tess: So you actually live in this dump.

Cutter: So you actually married that oaf?

Tess: I had my reasons.

Cutter: So do I.

Tess: So I thought that the Wentworths were rolling in it. What's a rich guy like you doing in a fleabag like this?

Cristian: Tess gave you the slip, huh? Don't be embarrassed. She's outsmarted better men than you.

Ford: Damn it, Tess, pick up the phone!

[Cell phone ringing]

Cutter: You gonna answer that?

Tess: I'm much more interested in you. So if you're so rich, how come you're sharing digs with winos, prostitutes, and crackheads? Are you keeping it real?

Cutter: It's called saving money.

Tess: So why don't you move in with Aubrey? At old man Clint's house?

Cutter: A little too close for comfort.

Tess: Why? Can't stand Aubrey?

Cutter: Would you want to move in with your sister?

Brody: Liam's feeling better. He finally drifted off.

Natalie: I heard.

Brody: Oh...my singing isn't meant for public consumption.

Natalie: It's all right. Liam liked it. So did I.

Brody: Did you hear anything else?

Natalie: All of it. I'm sorry, I know I shouldn't have done-- Brody. You're not really worried that my parents won't get custody of Ryder, are you?

Brody: You're not? I mean, I know it seems like it should be a slam dunk, but I gotta tell you, Natalie, things aren't looking so good.

Natalie: Yeah, but the judge, the judge has gotta be able to see through all of this. And you're gonna have Ryder back in your arms in no time.

Brody: I hope so. But getting Ryder back won't solve all our problems. It certainly won't bring Jessica back.

Tess: Good point. Any place is better when you don't have family breathing down your neck. Speaking of that, is there anything to drink in this hole?

Cutter: Help yourself.

Tess: Vodka? I think I'll pour myself one straight up. Okay, I'm pouring it. Picking it up. Putting it to my lips.

Cutter: Do you always give a play-by-play when you pour yourself a drink?

Tess: Aren't you gonna stop me?

Cutter: Why?

Tess: Because it's bad for me.

Cutter: If I didn't do things that were bad for me, I'd be very boring. And you'd be much less interested in me.

Tess: Good point. Two for two. To the bad things.

Dorian: I'm pretty certain you didn't come over here to congratulate me on the resumption of my relationship with David. So why have you come over?

Viki: In a word--Tess.

Tess: Mm. Whoo! It's been too long.

Cutter: You need to get out more often.

Tess: You can say that again. The trouble is, Jessica doesn't like my kind of fun.

Cutter: Yeah, I noticed she seems a little...like...

Tess: Tight-assed?

Cutter: Reserved.

Tess: That's because her parents raised her to be the family princess, not to mention the standards they set.

Clint: So you want payback. For what?

David: You kidnapped me from my own wedding. You let Dorian think that I left her for a foam party and you left me to rot in a desert prison where they tortured me every single day.

Clint: Tortured you? How?

David: They withheld astringent!

Clint: Well, then I guess we're even.

David: No, sir! Not until your pores are large enough to smuggle a toddler through customs. Then we'll be even.

Clint: After what you did to me, you deserved everything you got.

David: You mean Kim? Get over it.

Clint: No. And I am not going to argue with you about it.

David: No. You're gonna do exactly what the hell I say. Thanks to you, I almost lost everything, including Dorian. If Pa hadn't rescued me in time, she'd have--

Clint: She'd have what?

David: She'd have given up on me and given herself to some other gigolo who's even younger than I am.

Cutter: All right. So why is everybody all freaked out about you, anyways? It's not like you're going on a crime spree.

Tess: Thank you. Seriously, if people would just leave me in peace and let me do my thing, we'd all get along just fine. It's because I'm a nonconformist. I do things differently, and that puts people on edge.

Cutter: I heard that. Aubrey hates it when I don't toe the line. The thing, though, your family and your friends, they don't think you're a nonconformist. They think you're sick.

Tess: Because I use a different name? Because I like to cut loose and shake things up a little bit? Who has not wanted to reinvent themselves? Be someone else? Huh?

Cutter: Yeah, I definitely understand that. Hell, I've even done it.

Tess: Have you?

Cutter: What? You think I've always been "Cutter Wentworth"?

Natalie: I found it. I got it.

Brody: Hey. I want to help.

Natalie: You have a lifetime of picking up toys to look forward to. Go on. Get out of here.

Brody: And go where?

Natalie: Come on, Brody. We both know where you'd rather be and what you'd rather be doing right now.

Brody: Yeah. If I could think of a move to get Ryder and Tess back, I would, but I can't think of anything that doesn't land me in jail. Then there goes your mom and dad's shot at getting custody.

Natalie: I guess you're right.

Brody: I am. I'd never forgive myself if I screwed up my family all over again. I have no choice but to let the situation play out. Besides, I have other responsibilities.

Natalie: Like what?

Brody: Like my responsibility to Liam. And to you.

Tess: So...who were you before you were Cutter Wentworth? And please don't tell me that you were the shy, fat kid who was too scared to talk to girls.

Cutter: Not quite. I was just someone considerably less put together... a lot less patient, and far less agreeable than I am now.

Tess: So you were a little rough around the edges, impulsive, wasn't afraid to make people angry. Hmm. Sounds like the old Cutter Wentworth was worth knowing.

Cutter: Well, you might just get to meet him. The original me is never too far away.

Tess: But would big sister Aubrey approve?

Cutter: I can follow the rules with her, break them with you. I have no problem being different things for different people.

Tess: Like me.

Cutter: Yeah. Except no one's gonna commit me for doing it.

Tess: Ha ha ha! Trust me. No one's committing me, either.

Cutter: That's good. Because I got a feeling we're just getting started.

Ford: What the hell is the matter with your brother?

Joey: You just need to take a step back.

Ford: I would if you would put a leash on Cutter!

Aubrey: I'm sorry. I'm not my brother's keeper.

Ford: Well, he took off with Tess!

Aubrey: Cutter was here?

Ford: Until about two minutes ago when he sped out of the parking lot with Tess in tow.

Aubrey: That does not make any sense. Why would Cutter go anywhere with Tess?

Kelly: Maybe Cutter was tired of crying in his beer.

Aubrey: What is that supposed to mean?

Kelly: Obviously he didn't tell you. Dorian gave him the old heave-ho tonight.

Joey: Dorian?

Kelly: Mm-hmm. They had a brief flirtation. It's looking like Cutter's into rich girls.

Ford: Then he'd better keep his hands to himself.

Joey: Like you did?

Aubrey: Hold on, guys. Whoa, whoa, whoa. Play nice. I will take care of this. Damn it, Cutter.

Cristian: What can I get you?

Rama: A Delhi belly.

Cristian: What's in that?

Rama: I don't know. But it's sweet, like my husband. He makes it every day for me when he comes back from work. "A Delhi belly for the only lotus of notice."

Cristian: Send him over. I'm always up for adding a new drink to my arsenal.

Rama: Vimal won't be mixing cocktails for me anytime soon. Not from prison.

Clint: A gigolo even younger than you? I hope you weren't too jealous.

David: Of course not. What he may have on me in years, I make up for in knowledge of kitchen equipment.

Clint: So what are you whining about? It sounds to me like you and Dorian are back together. All's well that ends well.

David: I could have died in that prison, Uncle Clint. I went for days without water. Doesn't that mean anything to you?

Clint: It means the jailers were merciful. I would have given you even less. Mr. Vickers, you are a stain on this planet. Wherever you go, trouble and heartbreak follow. Everyone would be better off if you were gone.

David: Funny. Feel the same exact way about you.

Clint: So what are you gonna do? Shoot me? Have you got the guts? Aw, for Pete's sake. There. Now even you can't miss. Do it.

Dorian: I'm truly sorry about everything your family is going through right now. I can see that Tess is putting you through hell.

Viki: Oh, yeah.

Dorian: So what can I do to help?

Viki: Okay. Dorian, have you had any dealings with Tess since her most recent return?

Dorian: No.

Viki: No?

Dorian: No, and I hope that I do not because--no offense--but Tess is a bit of a monster, isn't she?

Viki: Oh, okay. Look, the reason I ask is she led me to believe that you two have talked and that you know something.

Dorian: Really? What would we talk about?

Viki: Charlie and Echo.

Echo: Charlie?

Charlie: Hmm?

Echo: Nothing. You were just so still, I thought maybe you'd fallen asleep.

Charlie: I wish I could fall asleep...here...with you.

Echo: But you can't.

Charlie: No. I have to go home.

Echo: To Viki.

Dorian: That is so bizarre. Why would Tess talk to me about Charlie and Echo?

Viki: Well, I don't know. That's what I'm trying to find out. The thing is, at the hearing, Tess started saying things about Charlie and Echo having a relationship. And when I asked her about it later, she said talk to you.

Charlie's voice: It's over. I told Echo I wouldn't see her again.

Viki: Dorian? Do you know what Tess was talking about?

Christian: I'm sorry about your husband.

Rama: So am I.

Christian: At least he has a beautiful, loyal wife waiting for him on the outside. Is he up for parole any time soon?

Rama: No. Apparently they take tampering with DNA tests really seriously over there.

Cristian: Your husband's Vimal Patel?

Rama: You know my husband? You know our case?

Cristian: I'm just really close with the Buchanan family.

Rama: Oh. I didn't know that. I'm sorry. I should probably go.

Cristian: No, no. Come on. Stay. It's not like you had anything to do with what your husband did. I heard he took full responsibility for all his actions.

Rama: Someone had to take the fall.

Clint: Here I am. You'll never again have a better chance. Go ahead and shoot me, because that's what you want to do, don't you? In a second, you could wipe me from the face of the earth, and you'd even the score for you and Dorian and that sanctimonious Bo and Nora.

David: That's exactly what you want, isn't it? If I shot you, Pa would have to arrest me. Step-Nora would have to throw me into jail, and I might never see Dorian again. With all due respect, Uncle Clint, you're just not worth the risk. But don't worry. This isn't over. I'm still gonna make you pay for every single thing that you did. Got a feeling my family might be a couple steps ahead of me, but I'll catch up.

Viki: Dorian, do you know something about Charlie and Echo that I don't know?

Dorian: Of course not. You know me, Viki. I tell you things you don't even want to know.

Viki: Why would Tess imply otherwise?

Dorian: Because if you're weak, you can't help Jessica. And that's exactly what Tess wants. So what better way than to confuse you by making you have doubts about your relationship with Charlie?

Viki: Okay. Well, I hope you're right. I apologize for intruding on your evening. I'm sorry. I have not been thinking very clearly recently.

Dorian: Well, that's understandable. Having to align yourself with the despicable Clint against your own daughter in court? You sure there isn't anything I can do to help?

Viki: Actually, you're doing it. You know, you're being a friend. You're being a good friend. Sometimes I think I don't know what I would do without you.

Brody and Natalie: Ohh...

Brody: I think I could fall asleep right here.

Natalie: Me too. Thank you for all your help.

Brody: It was just a couple toys.

Natalie: More like a million. But Brody, not just for the toys. Thank you for being here for Liam and me.

Brody: It's the least I could do.

Natalie: I know you're being pulled in 6 different directions. I just want you to know that being here--it means a lot to me.

Brody: Natalie, I know things are crazy, but I will never abandon you and Liam. It's just...

Natalie: What?

Brody: I can't help but wondering if me being here in this house if that costs you something with your family.

Natalie: How?

Brody: Your mom would never say anything to my face, but she has to blame me for what happened to Jessica. And I would hate it if that rubbed off on you, too.

Natalie: Brody, you are wrong in so many ways. I know my mom, and unfortunately she only blames herself for Tess coming out. And as far as what everyone thinks of you, I'm sorry, honey, but you are a boy scout compared to me. So if I can hack living here, so can you.

Brody: I think the only thing I can't hack is this whole never sleeping again thing.

Natalie: Yeah, tell me about it. Can any new parent?

Kelly: Is that from Tess?

Ford: No, it's from my mother. She says she'll stay with Ryder as late as I need her to. 'Course I'd be home already if Cutter hadn't run off with Tess.

Kelly: Try not to worry about Cutter. He probably doesn't quite get the whole Tess situation.

Ford: Is that supposed to make me feel better?

Kelly: He won't want to deal with her once he knows what's going on. He will bring her right back here once Aubrey explains the whole situation.

Ford: I bet she will.

Joey: You don't know the first thing about my wife.

Ford: Oh, I beg to differ.

Joey: What's that supposed to mean?

Kelly: Joey. Aubrey didn't tell you? She and Ford used to date.

Joey: Aubrey...and you?

Ford: Yeah, is that so hard to believe?

Joey: When was this?

Ford: A while ago at the Venice film festival.

Joey: Okay, and let me guess. The second she found out who you really were, she dropped you like a bad habit?

Ford: Actually, no. She lost interest in me because I wasn't rich, but lucky for you, Mr. Buchanan, that's not a problem.

[Cell phone rings]

Tess: Ohh... don't answer it.

Cutter: I gotta.


Cutter: Yello!

Aubrey: I know what you're doing.

Cutter: Hi, sis!

Aubrey: What? Couldn't close the deal with the mayor, so you had to find some other heiress to squeeze?

Cutter: You know me too well.

Aubrey: Well, you picked the wrong one. Ford is on the warpath. Joey is worried sick. Do you want them to call the cops? We really can't use that kind of attention right now.

Cutter: What was I supposed to do? She jumped in my car. I figured I'd look after her, keep her out of trouble.

Aubrey: Bring her back!

Tess: Sounds like the party's over.

Cutter: For tonight. But tomorrow is another day.

[Liam crying]

Brody: I guess we were more tired than we thought.

Natalie: Yeah. Yeah, we must have been.

Christian: One Delhi belly.

Rama: You made it?

Cristian: I looked up the recipe on my phone. I don't know how close it is, but...

Rama: Wow! Thank you. Cin-cin.

Cristian: How is it?

Rama: Tasty.

Cristian: Be honest.

Rama: You know, I'm sure it's technically perfect, but--

Cristian: But it's not quite the same. I can sort of relate with what you're going through, missing your husband.

Rama: You have a husband in prison, too?

Cristian: No, but I know what it's like to be separated from the one you love. My fiancée and I have lived on different continents for a while.

Rama: But you made it work.

Cristian: Actually, no, we broke up. But you know what, I'm sure you and Vimal have a much brighter future ahead of you. Excuse me.

Aubrey: Good news. Cutter is bringing Tess back.

Ford: I'm counting the minutes.

Aubrey: You're welcome.

Joey: Kelly, can you give Aubrey and I just a minute?

Kelly: Oh, of course.

Aubrey: So it was what I thought. Cutter didn't really know how to deal with the D.I.D. thing, so he apologizes.

Joey: I'm sure he feels bad.

Aubrey: Everything okay?

Joey: Aubrey, did you date Ford?

Aubrey: Did Kelly tell you that?

Joey: What does it matter who told me?

Aubrey: Well, I wouldn't call it dating. We went out a couple of times, and I wasn't interested.

Joey: Because he didn't have any money?

Echo: Are you sure you don't have some more time? I was thinking maybe we could grab a bite to eat or something.

Charlie: No, I'm sure.

Echo: Here.

Charlie: I'm sure. Viki left me a message right before I got here. She was calling from the courthouse. They were wrapping things up there. And she needed to run an errand, but then she was gonna go home. I should be there when she arrives.

Echo: Of course.

Charlie: Look, this has all been very hard on her, and I know it's been hard on you, too.

Echo: So what else is new?

Charlie: It won't always be like this.

Echo: I know what you're trying to do, Charlie. But I just don't want you to make promises that you can't keep.

Charlie: I didn't.

Viki: Good luck with David, although I'm convinced you won't need any luck this time.

Dorian: Just a minute. Viki, whatever it is that Tess told you about Charlie...

Viki: Yes.

Dorian: Forget about it. Just put it out of your mind. The man has made a commitment to you. Charlie loves you.

Echo: So I'll see you later?

Charlie: I'm sorry to do this.

Echo: You don't have to apologize. All you have to do is come back.

Charlie: I will!

Cutter: What are you doing?

Tess: Just got a little distracted.

Cutter: What you looking at?

Tess: Just something to remember the night by.

[Liam crying]

Natalie: I think it's probably time for Liam's feeding.

Brody: I'll get his bottle.

Natalie: No. It's okay. I'll take care of it.

Dorian: Yes, thank--

David: Sorry I'm late.

Dorian: Oh, cancel that. Thank you so--yes, cancel. Bye.

David: There she is.

Dorian: Oh, you!

David: The love of my life!

Dorian: You! You're back. You're back. What happened to you?

David: Ow!

Dorian: Did you go after Clint? Did you?

David: I cannot tell a lie. I did go forth and seek vengeance upon mine uncle.

Dorian: Did you hurt him?

David: I wanted to. I almost did, but then I got to thinking. If I kill Clint now, before he's had to answer for everything wrong that he's done, they'll probably give him a state funeral, probably come forth and eulogize him as being misunderstood or something like that. I want him to go out of this world as alone as he left me in that Moroccan prison cell.

Dorian: David.

David: Without my family, without you.

Dorian: Oh, sweetheart, you are never, never going to be alone. Never again!

[Dorian giggling]

Aubrey: No, Joey, I didn't drop Ford because he doesn't have any money. I dropped him because it turns out he's the kind of egotistical jerk who's so into himself he can't imagine that every woman might not be. So he makes up lies about them that they're gold diggers to make himself feel better. And now I know that my husband is the kind of guy who would believe a jerk like that.

Tess: Honey! I'm home! What?

Joey: Aubrey, I'm so sorry.

Aubrey: Joey, I'm tired. Can we just go home?

Joey: Yeah. I'll get the car.

Kelly: Somebody got trouble in paradise?

Aubrey: Rama, we're leaving.

Rama: Oh, that's my ride.

Cristian: Oh, it's on the house, until I perfect the recipe.

Rama: Really? Thank you. You know, it was really good for your first time.

Cristian: Then I'll have to keep practicing. Thanks.

Cutter: Dude, I said I'm sorry. Won't happen again.

Ford: Oh, it can happen all you want. You can take her out every night. Hell, you can keep her.

Tess: I thought you loved me.

Ford: Come on, dear. We're leaving. I don't know what you think you're playing at, but this is not gonna help us keep Ryder.

Tess: Listen. Don't get your panties in a knot, okay? It's not like I kidnapped a baby or tried to blow up a sibling. I have as much riding on getting this little rugrat as you do. Just wanted to have a little bit of fun. Ended up getting more than I bargained for, though.

Viki: Charlie!

Charlie: Here I am. Sorry I'm late. I got held up.

Viki: Oh, my. You are a sight for sore eyes. Sweetheart, today was awful.

Charlie: Well, you know something, I'm really kind of messy. I'm gonna take a shower first, but then you can tell me all about it. I'll be right back.

Viki: Okay.

Dorian: I'm ravenous. Where are those strawberries?

David: Right over here, where we left them.

Dorian: Oh. Sustenance!

David: You know what--

Dorian: What?

David: I’ve been thinking.

Dorian: Don't. I mean, don't think too hard, all right? You need your strength. You've been through a terrible ordeal.

David: Yeah, well, so have you. You thought I abandoned you. You despised me all those months. You almost fell into bed with that sad little man-whore. Clint made last year a living hell for both of us.

Dorian: Mm-hmm. Clint's gonna pay the consequences.

David: What better way than to start by showing Clint that all of his trouble was for nothing?

Dorian: How would we do that?

David: I'm saying what we ought to do is rub Clint's nose in it. I'm saying what we ought to do is finish what we started to do last year. I'm saying let's get married...tomorrow.

Dorian: Oh, yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes! Yes!

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