OLTL Transcript Wednesday 2/2/11

One Life to Live Transcript Wednesday 2/2/11


Episode # 10866

Provided By Suzanne
Proofread By Kathy

Todd: Let's go! It started!

[Music on TV]

Todd: Since when do you dress up for "Creature Feature"?

Téa: I can't tonight.

Todd: It's Wednesday.

Téa: I have a party.

Todd: You're going to a party dressed like that without me? Who you partying with?

Viki: Did your babies go to sleep?

Jessica: Eh, for now. God, are you wiped?

Natalie: I'll get my second wind when they wake up in the next 3 hours. This won't last, right? Please tell me this won't last.


Natalie: Oh, honey, this is a nice look for you.

Jessica: I might as well sew one to my clothes.

Viki: Will you listen to you two? This is the night before your wedding, your last night as single women. You two should be at a party.

Natalie: Ha ha!

Jessica: Right.

Natalie: Gigi wanted to throw a bachelorette party, but--

Viki: John and Brody are at their bachelor party.

Natalie: Yeah. Well, they practically had to be dragged out. They didn't want to go.

Jessica: We're like old married couples already.

Viki: Oh, please. Are you gonna take that lying down?

Natalie: No, because if I lie down, I am out.

Viki: Well, I, for one, hope that your fiancés are out painting the town.

Jessica: Thanks, Mom.

Viki: Ha ha ha! Somebody should be having fun tonight.

Jessica: Painting the town, huh?

Natalie: Oh, Rex said that he would keep it low-key.

Jessica: Hmm.

Rex: Men, it is said that we want to be a woman's first love, but they are smarter. They want to be a man's last romance. To John and Brody, Natalie and Jessica's last romance.

Joey: Cheers. All right.

Rex: Time for strippers.

Brody: Aw, you shouldn't have.

John: Really.

Rex: I got you. I guess I'm gonna have to save it for your bachelor party.

Joey: Yeah. I'm pretty sure my fiancée would appreciate it about just as much as theirs, so-- who needs a beer chaser?

Shaun: I'm in. Congratulations. Engaged?

Joey: Yeah. That's right.

Shaun: You're one lucky man. Kelly Cramer is a stone cold fox.

Cutter: You ready for round two?

Aubrey: Oh, I can't, and you can't, either.

Cutter: You want to bet?

Aubrey: You're late for the bachelor party.

Cutter: Nobody cares.

Aubrey: Want to bet? Joey specifically got them to ask you, so go be a good Buchanan-in-law.

Cutter: Boring.

Aubrey: Maybe, but necessary. The more we get them to trust us, the easier it'll be to clean them out.

Cutter: They don't need to trust us. The way you handled Clint, do you know what a turn-on that is?

Aubrey: Oh...

Aubrey: Mm! Go. Have fun, okay? Prove to them that you're just a charming, harmless dilettante.

Cutter: What are you gonna be doing?

Aubrey: Being a fabulous future sister-in-law.

Natalie: Okay. I think Joey and Aubrey at table 6 with Uncle Bo and Nora. I mean, they'll have fun.

Jessica: No. They should be at table one with Mom and Dad.

Natalie: Do you really want to risk that?

Jessica: Dad wouldn't ruin our wedding, no matter what.

Joel: Jessica Brennan?

Jessica: Yes?

Joel: You're under arrest.

Jessica: I'm under arrest?

Natalie: That's impossible.

Joel: I have a warrant.

Natalie: Then let me see it.

Joel: You can see everything I have.

Jessica: How did you get in the house?

Joel: A woman named Echo let me in.

Echo: Ooh, those smell good.

Viki: We're having a little private party tonight, so I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't mind staying out of the library.

Echo: Oh, yeah, of course. Did you know that there's a police officer arresting your daughters in the other room? That ought to clear it out.

Natalie: I work at the police station, and I've never seen you there.

Jessica: And our fiancés are on the force.

Joel: I'm just following orders. The warrant is for both of you.

Natalie: What?

Jessica: This is a joke. It has to be.

Joel: Do you see me laughing? Assume the position.

Téa: I told you all about it at breakfast.

Todd: I was watching cartoons.

Téa: Oh, I am out of here.

Todd: Well, hold on now. Hang on.

Téa: Mm-hmm?

Todd: What am I gonna do here all by myself?

Téa: Ooh, why don't you go to John McBain’s bachelor party?

Todd: Wasn't invited.

Téa: Oh, can't imagine why. Come here. You are so cute.

Todd: No, no, no. Don't call me cute like that.

Téa: So guapisimo, mi amor. Hee hee hee! Don't wait up!

Joey: My fiancée’s name is Aubrey.

Shaun: Oh, sorry.

Joey: No. It's okay. What made you think it was Kelly?

Shaun: No reason.

Joey: Shaun... John and Brody say that you're the best bodyguard around. You're very loyal.

Shaun: I like my job.

Joey: Well, not everyone who works for Dorian Lord can say that, so-- you used to work for Kelly, too, right?

Shaun: Dorian hired me to protect her for a while.

Joey: So is that why you thought it was Kelly and me? Was it something she said?

Shaun: It doesn't matter. Looks like I got the wrong idea. You're with somebody else.

Joey: Yeah. Yeah, and so is Kelly.

Brody: Hey. Rex, this is Cutter Wentworth, our almost-in-law.

Rex: Oh, glad you could make it.

Cutter: Where are the strippers?

Rex: See? No strippers. Ma and Pa Killjoy here said no.

Brody: What kind of guys would we be if we went in for the whole stripper thing?

Cutter: Red-blooded American males with a pulse?

John: I tell you what, Rex. You get married, and we'll have all the strippers and barnyard animals that you want. How's that?

Rex: Okay. So what, so the girls get to have a crazy night, but you can't?

Brody: What are you talking about? They're staying in tonight.

Rex: Oh, you obviously don't know my sister or her sister.

Gigi: Wait. Excuse me. What is going on here?

Kelly: Yeah. What is going on?

Jessica: Apparently, we're under arrest.

Gigi: I'm stunned. Vivian?

Vivian: I have no idea.

Kelly: Officer, do you have a warrant?

Joel: Yes, ma'am.

Kelly: Thank you. "For crimes against the men of Llanview..."

Vivian: "For depriving them of your sexy selves."

Jessica: Oh, no.

Vivian and Kelly: Oh, yeah.

Joel: You ladies sure you want to get married and miss this?

Natalie: Ha ha ha!


Aubrey: Rama, hi. I'm kind of in a hurry.

Rama: So make time.

Aubrey: Okay. I will. Call me tomorrow.

Rama: Now.

Aubrey: What's the problem?

Rama: You are... and what you did to my husband.

Vimal's voice: My complicity doesn't end with the alteration of his son's DNA test. He made me alter his daughter's, too.

Vimal: Wait, wait bartender, please. Another.

Echo: So you're not worried about the police officer?

Viki: No. He's not real. He's for the party.

Echo: Oh. Ooh. Well, I just came down to get Charlie some more soup.

Viki: Don't bother. I just took him soup.

Echo: Oh, really? Because I've just dropped by your room, and he said he wanted some more.

Viki: What the hell were you doing going into our bedroom?

Echo: I'm sorry. I'm just trying to help.

Viki: Well, don't and stay out of our room!

Dorian: Viki, do you know there's a naked man in your library?

Viki: Yes. What brings you by?

Dorian: Echo.

Viki: Oh, my God, what now?

Dorian: I have some bad news. Rex had another DNA test run.

Viki: Why did Rex have another DNA test done?

Dorian: Well, I may have suggested to him that the first test was tampered with.

Viki: Oh, Dorian, look. Whatever your vendetta against Clint is, I really wish you wouldn't drag Rex into it.

Dorian: But this directly concerns Rex.

Viki: Yeah. What if you're wrong?

Dorian: Clint and Echo are manipulating him. I can feel it.

Viki: So you convinced Rex to have another DNA test done on him.

Dorian: Yes. I did. At first, he was reluctant, but Rex does want to know.

Echo: Really? Know what?

Dorian: Oh, dear. Hello, Echo. How long were you lurking up there?

Echo: What did you do to Rex?

Dorian: Innocent until proven guilty.

Viki: Okay. Rex had another DNA test done.

Echo: Well, you know the labs make mistakes all the time, especially if the sample isn't a good one.

Dorian: Hmm, you think?

Echo: Of course.

Dorian: The test results showed that Charlie is Rex's father. Oh, and why do you look so surprised?

Rex: 6 more shots John's bottle. Hi. I know you.

Vimal: Um, I don't think so.

Rex: Yeah. I do.

Vimal: No, you don’t.

Rex: I saw you at B.E. with a bunch of balloons. You work for Clint, don't you?

Vimal: Not anymore.

Rex: Why? What'd he do to you?

Rama: Vimal was fired.

Aubrey: What?

Rama: My Vimal lost his job because you lied.

Aubrey: What are you talking about?

Rama: You promised me. You looked me in the eye, and you promised you wouldn't say a word.

Aubrey: Hold on. Wait a second. What happened, exactly?

Rama: Clint Buchanan accused Vimal of leaking what he'd done in the DNA lab. Vimal denied it, of course. The only person he breathed a word about it to was me. He couldn't imagine I would say anything, just like I couldn't imagine my friend would stab me in the back.

Aubrey: I didn't mean to hurt you.

Rama: Anything for a profit.

Aubrey: Clint was going to disown my fiancé. He would've left Joey with nothing. I had to protect him. I never thought that Clint would fire your husband.

Rama: Oh, I believe you never thought.

Aubrey: I'm sorry Vimal got hurt.

Rama: Oh, not as sorry as you will be.

Joey: I know Kelly still has some feelings for me, and she's a great friend, maybe my best friend.

Shaun: Those two things go together real easy.

Joey: Yeah. Well, they wouldn’t. That's why I went and saw her as soon as I figured things out. I thought we should clear the air.

Shaun: How'd it go?

Joey: I didn't get a chance.

Shaun: Why not?

Joey: She was kissing someone else.

Gigi: Whoo!

Kelly: All right, ladies. Come on. Tell him you want to see some more.

Jessica: No. I have the right to remain silent.

Roxy: Oh, damn, did we miss the stripper?

Gigi: Oh, just in time, Roxy.

[All scream]

Téa: Oh, my God!

Roxy: Grind, baby, grind.

Gigi: I'm glad you made it. I was starting to worry.

Téa: Yeah. Me, too. Thank God for the DVR to entertain my husband. Oh, my God, take it off, hombre!

Todd: Oh! Double decapitation with farm tools. Didn't see that one coming. Man, this blows.

Brody: Yeah. Well, this time tomorrow, we'll be married men.

John: Nervous?

Brody: You're not? Oh, well, I'm sorry. John McBain doesn't get nervous.

John: I wouldn't say that.

Brody: You wouldn't?

John: Not to anybody else.

Brody: So are you saying--

John: Yeah. I might be a little edgy...

Brody: Huh.

John: But, like I said--

Brody: Hey, hey, don't worry about it. Your secret is safe with me. Whatever happens, I got your back.

John: Good to know, especially when you're marrying into the Buchanan family.

Vimal: Why do you assume that Mr. Buchanan did something to me?

Rex: Oh, it's just a hunch. I've seen his work, and it's not like Clint is some warm, fuzzy, fuzzy--

Brody: Balsom, we're gonna bounce.

Rex: What? Are you kidding. The night is still young.

John: Hey, look. Anything gets broken, I don't want to hear about it.

Rex: Seriously?

John: No.

Brody: Yeah. I want to go tuck in my son and his mother.

Rex: Go. Fine. You guys are hopeless. Good-bye.

John: Thanks again.

[Cell phone beeps]

Rex: We'll send pictures... just like the girls did. Ooh. Somebody is gonna get busted.

[Cell phone rings]

Todd: Yeah. What do you want? No. I don't take orders from you. Everything is under control. Just leave me alone.

Todd: Excuse me. Are you with the John McBain party?

Vimal: Who?

Todd: John McBain, bachelor party, Brody Lovett.

Vimal: Brody? Brody Lovett? Why are you asking me about Brody Lovett? I don't know anything about Brody Lovett or Rex Balsom, for that matter.

Todd: Who mentioned anything about Rex Balsom?

Vimal: Look. I'm sorry. I'm just a little agitated tonight.

Todd: Yeah. I guess you are. Tell you what. Why don't you share your shots with me and tell me all about it, yeah?

Aubrey: I want to help you, Rama. I'm not sorry that I protected Joey, but there's got to be a way I can help you, too, so let's just think.

Rama: Now you want to think. That's all I've been doing since Vimal told me the news.

Aubrey: Good. So let's come up with something.

Rama: I've been thinking about everything I know about you.

Aubrey: What does that mean? What are you gonna do? Rama, you wouldn't say anything. You wouldn’t.

Rama: All options on the table, Aubrey "Wentworth."

Aubrey: Are you threatening me?

Shaun: So you caught a break with Kelly. If she's with someone else, that's good for you, right?

Joey: Yeah, but the guy is completely wrong for her.

Shaun: Then she'll see it. She's smart. You worried about her?

Joey: Of course I'm worried about her. Kelly is--

Shaun: Special.

Joey: Yeah. Yeah.

Shaun: You still care about her, and I don't mean as a friend. Do you still have feelings for her?

Joey: Yeah.


Joel: Thank you.

Natalie: Keys. Keys, please, please.

Gigi: Oh, we didn't tell you? You have to keep those on.

Jessica: Do you guys want to change diapers, then?

Téa: Your mother has that covered. Could I have the keys now? Oh, no, he didn’t. Oh, no, he didn't!

Vivian: I wonder where Gigi found a stripper on such short notice.

Kelly: I don't know, but I don't care.

Vivian: He looks like your type.

Kelly: Oh, it's been too long for me to remember.

Vivian: Oh, well, that's not right. A woman as beautiful as you must have men beating down her door.

Kelly: Not the one I want.

Téa: When you go after these, throw the key out here, too.

Roxy: Ooh, I may just have to go diving after that key.

Gigi: Okay, Roxy. Joel, thank you very much. See you in class.

Téa: What's your major? Because I am a very good study partner. I'm an intellectual.

Roxy: Oh, really?

Natalie: Keys, please.

Téa: You think we should let these two wild ladies go?

Gigi: I don't know.

Roxy: Well, there's no use them being cuffed if there's nobody to play with.

Jessica: Guys, that was really special.

Roxy: I'll bet the guys aren't having half as much fun. [Laughter]

Joel: You guys are second shift?

John: Excuse me?

Joel: Good luck. They're a pretty rowdy bunch, especially that little blonde.

John: Make sure that uniform gets returned.

Téa: More strippers! Awesome! Take it off!

Natalie: Wait, wait, wait, wait. What are you guys doing here?

John: Apparently, we're the second shift.

Téa: Yes! Awesome!

Echo: I'm surprised that my son would allow himself to be manipulated by the likes of you.

Dorian: Rex doesn't trust you any more than I do. You faked those DNA tests. I don't know how, but you did because it's much better for you if Chuckles is Rex's father because it gets you that much closer to Charlie.

Echo: Oh, no. I don't need Rex to do that. The two of you are doing a great job of pushing me and Charlie together.

Viki: How dare you.

Echo: It's true.

Dorian: Charlie loves Viki, and it is just so pathetic watching you throw yourself at him so relentlessly.

Echo: Jealousy is so ugly on you, Dorian.

Dorian: Oh, do you think I'm jealous of you?

Echo: No. You're jealous of my friendship with Charlie because you are miserable and alone. You are nothing but a bitter and spiteful, sorry excuse--

Viki: Okay. That's it. That's enough. Let me tell you something. Dorian Lord is 20 times the woman that you will ever be. You know what? I have had it. Get out!

Echo: Don't worry. I'll just go on upstairs--

Viki: No. I didn't say up. I said out. I want you out of my house and out of my life.

Aubrey: Hi. Happy bachelorette party.

Jessica: Hi, Aubrey.

Aubrey: Sorry I'm late. Uh, why is it so quiet?

Jessica: Oh, Natalie and I are exhausted, so the party moved to Rodi’s.

Roxy: Hey, listen to that.

[Music playing]

Roxy: Johnny is playing my song. Ooh!

Kelly: I'm just saying it's probably my fault for being so slow to realize that Joey was the one.

Vivian: Well, it's not like these things have a timetable, you know?

Kelly: Well, they do when the man you're in love with is engaged to someone else.

Vivian: That is a problem. You're right.

Kelly: This is all confidential. You are my doctor.

Vivian: Well, technically, this is not a medical matter, but I think we could maybe call this a heart problem.

Kelly: Oh, yes. Uh-huh. It is.

Vivian: Mm-hmm. Would you like a prescription?

Kelly: Please.

Vivian: Tell Joey how you feel.

Joey: Look. I'm engaged, and I love Aubrey. Kelly is one of the most important people in my life. That's not gonna change.

Shaun: You sure that's all there is to it? You don't want anything more? Hey, it's none of my business, but if it were me, I'd make sure before I married some other woman.

Gigi: Bryan, my man, break out the good stuff.

Bryan: What's the good stuff?

Roxy: Whatever is open. Ha ha ha!

Bryan: Compliments of the owner.

Roxy: Ooh, that's what I'm talking about.

Todd: So this is the bachelorette party?

Roxy: Yeah, minus the brides.

Todd: Where's my wife?

Gigi: She had a client emergency. She said you were home watching TV.

Todd: Yeah. I should've stayed there, too.

Roxy: Hey, Geeg, over here.

Todd: This place is a lot more scary than "Creature Feature," I'll tell you that, even when Téa pauses to count the body parts.

Vimal: She sounds like quite a woman, your wife.

Todd: Eh. Oh, yeah. She's beautiful, smart, makes grown men cry. She's a lot of fun.

Vimal: Sounds very familiar.

Todd: She's a pain in the ass.

Vimal: Yeah. Yeah. That, too.

Todd: Not to mention, she owes me big time.

Vimal: Huh?

Todd: Oh, she kept my own daughter a secret till she was a teenager. Can you believe that?

Vimal: Oh, you don't say.

Todd: I had a kid, didn't even know about her...

Vimal: Really?

Todd: And then she let my daughter think this other guy was her dad. Ever hear of anything so screwed up in your life?

Vimal: What? What? Me? No. Never.

Todd: My own daughter hated me, and she loved the other guy, this creep who tried to kidnap her twice. What kind of a person keeps a secret like that?

Rex: So did you have a good time at the par-tay?

Gigi: Definitely.

Rex: Yeah. Saw the stripper. He looked well-qualified.

Gigi: Joel?

Rex: Oh, you're on a first-name basis.

Gigi: Yeah. So are you. He's the nude model for Cristian’s art class. You saw him that night you came to pick me up.

Rex: Oh, yeah. I blocked that out.

Gigi: I haven’t.

Rex: Well, listen. Next time you need a nude model, you call me instead.

Gigi: Oh, right. What about when I need a stripper?

Rex: Same thing.

Gigi: Right.

Rex: Oh, what, you don't think I got the moves, Morasco?

Gigi: Ha ha! Stop it.

Rex: Stop it. All right. You asked for it. Ho ho ho! Watch and be amazed.

Gigi: No, Rex. Please. No. Baby—

Vivian: Hey, babe.

Shaun: How was the party?

Vivian: Okay. If you want to know the truth, I don't really get the whole stripper thing. I never have, especially not with the skinny, little guy that we had.

Shaun: You do have fine taste, baby.

Vivian: Yes. I do. After that, I just listened to Kelly Cramer’s sad love life.

Shaun: She told you about Joey Buchanan?

Vivian: You know about it?

Shaun: From Joey.

Vivian: What did he tell you?

Cutter: We're gonna need you, papa bear. Oh, God!

Joey: Hey.

Kelly: Hey.

Rex: We need you.

Joey: For what?

Rex: Don't worry. It'll be fun. Hope you got some dollar bills left.

John: Look at that. Might want to hold on to that. There might be a little action on the honeymoon.

Natalie: Well, maybe I will.

Jessica: Uh-oh. Did I hear stripper envy? What about you?

Brody: We were not expecting that.

Natalie: Well, come on. I can't believe you guys crashed our bachelorette party.

John: We didn't know there was one.

Brody: We came to kiss our sons good night.

John: Roman orgy was kind of a bonus.

Natalie: Oh, come on. I'm sure Rex had chicks popping out of the cake for you.

Brody: It was very tame.

Natalie: Really? I just thought that Rex was saying that to make me feel better.

John: Rodi's is a very serious drinking bar. We have a no-stripper policy.

Natalie: Ha!

Rex: Good evening, ladies! Next time you want to party, you can stay in house for your stripper needs because the men in your life are here to please. Hit it, Roxy!

Roxy: Oh, my God, okay.

Kelly: Whoo!

Gigi: Whoo!

[Right said Fred's "I'm too sexy" playing]


Roxy: Aw, too bad Viki is stuck at Llanfair because she would love this.

Echo: I can't believe you'd ask me to leave, especially with Charlie so ill.

Viki: Oh, well, that's one of the reasons, isn't it? You do not go into our bedroom where my husband is. I take care of my husband, and don't you dare try and hide behind him again. I am sick to death of you trying to play on his sympathy and his good na-- you know what? I'm sick to death of you being in the middle of everything in our lives.

Echo: I only want to know my son.

Viki: Well, you don't have to live in my house to do it.

Echo: I'm sorry. Isn't this Charlie's house, too?

Viki: Yes. It is, and that is between my husband Charlie and me. Now I want you out.

Echo: So you're just gonna throw me out on the street.

Viki: Oh, with great pleasure. In fact, I'm gonna pack your bag and throw it out with you.

Dorian: Oh, oh, oh, oh, no, no, no, no, no. Where do you think you're going?

Echo: This is none of your business, Dorian.

Dorian: Oh, really? Uh-huh. I know what you're gonna do. You do your little helpless act with Chuckles upstairs.

Echo: Get out of my way!

Dorian: Or what?

Echo: Or I'll move you.

Dorian: Go ahead. Try it. Oh, please try it. Viki may be too much of a lady to lay hands on you, but I sure as hell am not!

Echo: You really want to tempt me?

Viki: I called you a cab. So you can wait outside.

Echo: Oh, boy, this is quite an act you two have going.

Viki: Oh, this is not an act. I'm not kidding. You're gonna get out, and you're gonna stay out.

Echo: And your little buddy here is gonna back you up on that?

Dorian: You can count on it.

Echo: You really do make a cute couple, but too bad it's not going to last because once you don't have me to gang up on, you'll be right back at each other's throats again.

Viki: Ohh...pbbt.

Dorian: Thank you.

Viki: What?

Dorian: For saying I was 50 times the woman that Echo is.

Viki: Dorian, I said 20.

Dorian: Hmm. She's gonna give Charlie an earful.

Viki: I'm sure she will, but, oh, it was so worth it!

Dorian: Ha ha ha!

Todd: Since when did this place become a gay bar, anyway? Hey, I'm talking, and it's like you never listen to me anymore.

Vimal: Sorry. I--

Todd: What's wrong?

Vimal: It's just, I got fired today, and I don't know what to do.

Todd: No. It's okay. You have to fight back now.

Vimal: No. It's so hard with some people.

Todd: No. Listen to me. Those are the people who need it the most, huh?

Vimal: Yeah.

Shaun: I got it all set up. It's all good.

Cutter: So what do you think? You think I have a future as an exotic dancer?

Kelly: With some practice, I think you might be okay.

Cutter: Be my coach.

Kelly: I can coach you. Ha ha ha!

Vivian: Kelly, can I get a hand? Gigi said that John left some things for the reception in the basement, so--

Cutter: Guys need some help?

Vivian: Nope. No. You know what? It's not heavy, and it's a two-person job, really, so--

Kelly: Okay. Sure. I will see you at the wedding tomorrow.

Cutter: I'll save you a seat.

Kelly: Okay.

Gigi: Maybe we should ride in the cab with her.

Roxy: Oh, goody. I'll drive.

Rex: Probably.

Aubrey: That was some serious hidden talent you got there.

Joey: Yeah.

Aubrey: You come back to my room, give me a private show?

Shaun: Excuse me. I need a favor. I just got a text from John. There's some champagne in the basement that he needs for the wedding.

Joey: All right. Let's go. I'll be right back.

Shaun: This may take a while.

Aubrey: I'll see you in the room.

Joey: It's a date.

Cutter: Sounds like we have time for round two.

Kelly: Okay. What are we looking for?

Vivian: Uh, you know, the box should be labeled "wedding," so--

[Cell phone beeps]

Vivian: You know what? One of my patients just went into labor, so I really--

Kelly: No. Go ahead. Go ahead. I can find it myself.

Vivian: Great.

Kelly: Okay.

[Shaun hums]

[Cell phone beeps]

Shaun: Oh.

Joey: You all right? What's that?

Shaun: Oh, man, I got a client in the gym. I got to run.

Joey: All right.

Shaun: All right. Appreciate it.

Joey: No worries. I got this.

Shaun: All right.

Joey: Right. Kelly?

Kelly: What are you doing here?

Joey: Looking for champagne. What are you doing here?

Vivian: That's good. Let's go.

Kelly: Party favors. Vivian asked me to look for some party favors for the reception, so-- whoo!

Joey: Whoa! Okay. Oh, careful.

[Téa chuckles]

Téa: You awake? I missed you tonight.

Aubrey: We have a problem.

Cutter: Don't worry. I know the cure to every problem.

Aubrey: I'm serious. We have a situation.

Vimal: Hmm? Rama! Ha ha!

Rama: The bartender called, Vimal. How much did you drink?

Vimal: I-- two-- too much.

Rama: Listen, Vimal. Vimal, this is all my fault. I told Aubrey what you did for Clint Buchanan. She betrayed me.

Vimal: I had a feeling, but I know. I know you could never do anything intentionally to hurt me.

Rama: Of course not. So I'm gonna help you. I have a plan.

Cutter: Is Rama mad enough to go to Clint?

Aubrey: I don't know.

Cutter: With what? Your I.D. is solid. We covered our tracks. We'll figure something out in the morning. Can't do anything right now, except--

Aubrey: Joey is gonna be here any minute. I'll see you tomorrow at the wedding.

Cutter: Joey?

Joey: You okay?

Kelly: Are you? You're the one who broke my fall.

Joey: Yeah. Well, it was the least I could do, so--

Kelly: Okay.

Joey: All right.

Kelly: Let's get out of here.

Joey: Okay. Okay.

Kelly: What?

Joey: It's stuck.

Kelly: Give it a shove.

Joey: I did. Kelly, it won't move.

Kelly: Well, let me try. Okay.

Joey: All right. Fine.

Kelly: Hold this, please.

Joey: Okay.

[Pounds on door]

Kelly: Help! Hello! The door is stuck.

Joey: Hello? Hello?

Kelly: Help! Help!

Brody: I can't believe you're throwing us out.

Jessica: It's tradition.

Natalie: Yeah. Midnight is tomorrow.

John: And what, we can't see you until your wedding day?

Brody: It's just lame superstition.

Jessica: After all we've been through to get here, I'm not tempting fate. Hmm.

Rama: Okay. First, we get you sobered up.

Vimal: What for? My life is over.

Rama: Shh! Nonsense, Vimal. This is just the beginning, okay? Now let's get you home. We have a very big day tomorrow. Come on.

Jessica: Sleep well, guys.

John: Uh-huh.

Natalie: Now, you two, do not stay up all night talking.

John: Sure. We were gonna read our journals to each other.

Natalie: Ha ha ha! Well, you get a full night's sleep, no baby duties.

Jessica: Yes. Enjoy it because after tomorrow, I'm never letting you out again.

Brody: No place I'd rather be.

John: Good night, Mrs. McBain.

Natalie: Almost.

John: Tomorrow.

Natalie: Yeah. Tomorrow.

Jessica: I can't wait.

Brody: I will see you at the altar.

Jessica: Get.

John: Fall out, Lovett.

Rama: All right. Okay. Listen, Vimal. The plan is this. You okay? Tomorrow we're going to that wedding, invited or not. It's time for Clint Buchanan’s family to know the truth about everything. Come on.

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