OLTL Transcript Monday 1/3/11

One Life to Live Transcript Monday 1/3/11


Episode # 10845

Provided By Suzanne
Proofread By Kathy


Man: Should Auld acquaintance be forgot and never brought to mind? Should Auld acquaintance be forgot in days of Auld Lang Syne? For Auld Lang Syne, my dear for Auld Lang Syne we'll take

Kelly: You okay?

Joey: Sure. Oh, yeah. It's just--just everyone's in the holiday spirit.

Kelly: Happy New Year.

Joey: Happy New Year. I'd kiss you, but, uh...

Kelly: Yeah?

Joey: Something tells me I don't think Kevin would like it.

Kelly: Forget about Aubrey.

Joey: What?

Kelly: I mean she probably wouldn't go for it either.

Joey: No, no, definitely not.

Kelly: Thank you. We'll keep our lips to ourselves for appearances' sake.

Joey: Okay.

Kelly: Stick to fiancés.

Joey: To sticking with fiancés.

Kelly: You know, it's a Cramer woman rule.

Joey: How about sticking with other people's fiancés? What is the Cramer ruling on that one?

Rex: Happy New Year, Morasco.

Gigi: Happy New Year, Balsom. What's your new year's resolution?

Rex: I am gonna love you more in 2011 than you ever thought possible. And I'm gonna make sure that you know every day how much I love you. What's your resolution?

Gigi: I was gonna say "eat more greens."

Rex: Greens are good.

Gigi: But you know I love you, too.

Rex: I do. My resolution is a lot more fun, and it's way easier to keep.

Gigi: You're already doing a good job of it. What is it?

Rex: I don't see Marty anywhere. Do you think she left?

Natalie: I offer this ring as a symbol of my love and devotion. Let this ring be a reminder of my love for you.

Judge Runyon: John and Natalie...

Marty: Stop!

Judge Runyon: I now pronounce you--

Marty: Stop this wedding.

Gigi: If Marty left, she probably went home.

Rex: I hope so.

Gigi: You're worried about Natalie.

Rex: Marty has gone after her pretty hard lately. Natalie thinks she's backed off. What if she hasn't?

Gigi: What a great brother. In fact, you're like a superhero.

Rex: Spidey's got nothing on me.

Gigi: Let me get you home and find out.

Rex: Just let me call Natalie first.

Gigi: In the middle of her wedding?

Rex: They should be done with the ceremony.

Gigi: I think if something happened, she would have called us.

Rex: I guess. I just don't want anything to spoil this wedding.

Jessica: Marty, is everything okay? Why are you here?

John: Is everything all right? Did something happen with Cole?

Marty: That's not why I'm here. You're so good to look out for him.

John: Just say the word.

Marty: I will. I hope Cole can always count on you. It's gonna be a lot harder when you have your own family to look after.

Natalie: Marty.

John: I won't disappear.

Marty: Neither will I.

Natalie: We're in the middle of something here.

Marty: I can see that, but this is important.

Gigi: You really think Marty would show up at the courthouse?

Rex: She's been after Natalie ever since Cole got arrested.

Gigi: Which was so not Natalie's fault.

Rex: Hey, I didn't say it was rational.

Gigi: Still, for Marty to crash the wedding--I mean, that would be so low.

Rex: I don't know. Morasco, you want to tell me about busting up weddings?

Gigi: Okay. Okay, yeah. That was different because I loved you. Besides, it didn't work. You married her anyway.

Rex: One of my bigger mistakes.

Gigi: Agreed. What now?

Rex: They haven't come up for air yet. I think that's still the same kiss.

Gigi: Wow. Impressive, if that were his fiancée. What's my dear old boss up to?

Cristian: Whoa.

Blair: Yeah.

Cristian: I'm engaged. I can't be doing this.

Blair: It's my fault. I got a little carried away.

Cristian: Come on. It wasn't just you. Wow. That was out of control. What am I thinking?

Blair: Come on. You're mad at Layla because you saw her in that French magazine all over her boss.

Cristian: I can't believe this is how I'm starting the New Year.

Blair: What are you talking about? This is a great night.

Cristian: Layla and I are supposed to be planning our wedding.

Blair: Yeah, and I'm supposed to be married to Mr. Perfect right now.

Cristian: He was a psycho killer.

Blair: Oh, God, why didn't I figure that out before the wedding?

Cristian: Well, at least he's dead. He can't hurt you anymore.

Blair: Yeah. He's gone. All he left me was a stupid box.

Jack: Hey, Sam. You're supposed to be in bed.

Sam: So are you. What are you doing?

Jack: Field-testing my Christmas loot.

Sam: Can I try?

Jack: No, but you can watch.

Sam: What are you gonna do?

Jack: Bust open the serial killer's mystery box.

Rex: They finally caught their breath.

Gigi: That could have been a record.

Rex: You think Layla knows?

Gigi: I'm sure she will once you tell Adriana.

Rex: I don't tell Adriana things anymore.

Gigi: If you say so.

Rex: Because it's true.

Gigi: You also told me that you were passing on Kelly’s case.

Rex: I did. I told her that I didn't want to screw things up for Joey and Aubrey.

Gigi: So when she came over here earlier and tried to drag you away, what was that about?

Rex: Okay, I turned down Kelly at first, but then she begged me--

Gigi: And you couldn't resist her charm.

Rex: She was holding a barbell to my neck.

Gigi: Look over there at Joey. You could learn something. He has no problem saying no to Kelly.

Kelly: Okay, I guess Blair gave up her no-man policy.

Joey: Yeah, and I guess Cristian and Layla have called off their engagement.

Kelly: Oh, I don't think so.

Joey: Did you see what I just saw?

Kelly: Yeah. It was one kiss. That doesn't necessarily mean anything, does it?

Joey: Really? Kelly, come on. I mean, that kiss was something.

Kelly: Okay, you're telling me you would break off your engagement with Aubrey if you saw her kissing another guy?

Joey: Aubrey would never do that.

Aubrey: Are you out of your mind?

Man: Completely. I can't even think straight, but you can fix that.

Aubrey: Stay away from me. What the hell are you doing here?

Jessica: Marty, I understand that this must be important, but we're almost done.

Marty: No. It can't wait till after the wedding.

John: Why not?

Marty: You'll understand when I tell you.

Natalie: Marty.

Marty: I promise it won't take long, but there's some news I really need to deliver.

Kelly: You have a lot of faith in Aubrey.

Joey: Yeah, I do. Why wouldn't I?

Kelly: I don't know.

Joey: Is there some reason why I shouldn't trust her?

Kelly: It's just an observation, that's all. I can see you trust Aubrey.

Joey: I'm sorry. I shouldn't have jumped down your throat. I'm just getting really sick of people assuming the worst about her.

Kelly: Okay. Who's doing that?

Aubrey: Put it on.

Man: Only if you take yours off.

Aubrey: I'm not playing.

Man: Neither am I. Why do you think I flew all the way from Europe?

Aubrey: I don't know why you would do something so incredibly stupid.

Man: Sure you do. You need to just relax, babe.

Aubrey: That's kind of hard to do with you here.

Man: I missed you. Is that a crime?

Aubrey: You could ruin everything.

Joey: You saw my dad. He was great with you, but Aubrey was invisible.

Kelly: I didn't notice that.

Joey: Really? Okay. My dad is convinced that Aubrey is a gold-digger.

Kelly: You know, I got the impression from what Aubrey said that she has her own money.

Joey: Exactly.

Kelly: So that's not true?

Joey: I guess. We don't talk about money. She's not interested, all right? But my dad just won't give her a chance.

Kelly: So he was like that all during Christmas?

Joey: Yeah, pretty much. He took a stab at being civil, but that won't really continue.

Kelly: You know what? He thinks he's protecting you.

Joey: Oh, okay. My dad just wants me to be happy, and when I tell him that Aubrey, I'm in love with her and that she makes me happy, he doesn't believe me. I mean, who is he? Hell, who is anybody to tell me what makes me happy?

Man: Hey, I know the plan, and I know what I'm doing. I waited until the dope left. I was careful, unlike you.

Aubrey: I've been very careful.

Man: Who caught that picture of us in that magazine "Maintenant"? Where would our plan be now if I hadn't warned you? Anybody could have seen it.

Joey: I'm sorry I unloaded on you.

Kelly: Oh, no. You didn't.

Joey: It must seem like the only thing I talk about is Aubrey.

Kelly: You know what? She's important to you.

Joey: I still feel like I'm being a bad friend.

Kelly: No. You kept me company tonight. Big friend points for you, Mister.

Joey: I'm just sorry Aubrey got sick. We all could have hung out. I really want you to get to know her, Kel.

Kelly: I do, too. I want to know everything about her.

Joey: I should probably actually check up on her. Knowing Aubrey, she's probably done with that magazine and bored already.

Kelly: Yeah. That magazine.

Aubrey: I took care of it.

Man: I thought you missed a copy.

Aubrey: That's it.

Man: You're welcome.

Aubrey: It's your fault there was a picture taken at all. You're the one who insisted we go to that club.

Man: It was your last night. You needed a couple of body shots before you came here.

Aubrey: It was the opening. You knew there would be photographers there.

Man: It's your fault they were looking at us. If you weren't so hot...

Aubrey: If I had missed my plane...

Man: We could have come up with another excuse. You didn't have to rush over here.

Aubrey: It's part of the job.

Man: You promised the job wouldn't come between us.

Aubrey: It won't.

[Cell phone rings]

Man: It already has.

Aubrey: It's Joey.

Man: Just let it ring.

Aubrey: I can't. Hey.

Man: Damn it.

Joey: Hey, is somebody with you?

Rex: I was going to walk away from the assignment and the big check that comes with it.

Gigi: So is that what convinced you--the money?

Rex: No, but Kelly would have just gone to another P.I. So she made me a deal. I give her one morning, and if I don't find anything on Aubrey, she'd let it go.

Gigi: Did you convince her?

Kelly: Hey, do you have your lock-picking tools?

Rex: What superhero doesn't?

Kelly: I don't know what that means, but good. We have to break into Aubrey's room.

Gigi: I guess not.

Cristian: She's not picking up.

Blair: Good.

Cristian: Good?

Blair: Yes, good. This is not the moment to try and fix things. What time is it in Paris anyway? She's asleep.

Cristian: Yeah, after a long, hot night with Steffen.

Blair: Oh, now that's a great way to start the conversation. You're lucky she didn't pick up.

Cristian: We got to make things right.

Blair: This isn't the time to do it, and you're in no shape to do that.

Cristian: I'm fine.

Blair: Oh, excuse me. I guess I'm the one that's had one too many.

Cristian: After the year you've had, I think you deserve it.

Blair: That's right.

Cristian: Listen, you want a ride home?

Blair: Sure.

Cristian: Okay. Let's go.

Blair: You are such a good friend.

Cristian: So are you. Tell me the truth.

Blair: What?

Cristian: Do you think Layla and I have a shot?

Blair: Don't ask me a question like that. Marriage is a sucker bet.

Natalie: Marty, this is a wedding, and the ceremony is almost over.

Marty: John. John, I only want the best for you.

John: Thank you.

Natalie: I thought we'd come to an understanding.

Marty: We did. We did. We did come to an understanding, and I have nothing more to say to you and John.

Natalie: Good. Let's finish.

Marty: But Jessica--Jessica really needs to hear me out.

Jack: Uh! The thing is unbreakable. It chewed up my best drill bit. The hammer barely dented it.

Sam: Now what?

Jack: You know where I can get my hands on some acid?

Sam: Nope.

Jack: We could throw it off the roof.

Sam: It would just bounce.

Jack: You got any better ideas?

Sam: Grandma has a bunch of fireworks for Chinese New Year.

Jack: No kidding?

Sam: She hid them in the attic. I'll show you where.

Jack: Hmm, explosives. I like the way you think. Come on. Let's go get those fireworks. Sam, run!

Blair: Wait, Jack. You better run. I see that look on your face. I know you're up to something, Jack.

Cristian: Bonjour. Mademoiselle Williamson, s'il vous plait. Hey, who the hell is this?

Aubrey: It was the TV. Are you having fun?

Joey: I'd rather be with you. Are you feeling better?

Aubrey: A little.

Joey: I'm bringing you chicken soup.

Aubrey: Don't.

Joey: I thought you just said you were feeling better.

Aubrey: But I could still be contagious. Just stay there. Have fun with your friends. I'll call you tomorrow.

Joey: Love you.

Aubrey: I love you, too, sweetie.

Man: Now I'm gonna be sick.

Aubrey: It's what Joey likes.

Man: It's not what you like.

Aubrey: What is wrong with you? You said you could live with this.

Man: Maybe I can't.

Aubrey: What do you mean, you can't? It's too late.

Man: Is it?

Aubrey: I don't believe this.

Man: Hey, so I can't stand the thought of the Boy Scout groping you every night. All right, sue me. I just think about his hands--

Aubrey: What, what, what do you want, huh? You gonna walk away now? You want to scrap the whole thing?

Gigi: Kelly, we're on a date.

Kelly: I know, and I'm sorry, and I would not be asking this if it wasn't important. You know what? Why don't you come, too?

Rex: What? No.

Kelly: Yes. She'd be an awesome lookout.

Rex: Gigi and I made a pact not to get arrested together anymore.

Gigi: You need someone on the outside prepared to post bail, assuming I'm in the mood.

Rex: Kelly, can this wait?

Kelly: See, like, if I'm right, we don't have long to catch Aubrey with the goods.

Rex: The goods? What, is she fencing hot watches?

Kelly: Rex, what did you hear Aubrey say on the phone? Her exact words.

Rex: Uh, okay, she said she had gotten every copy except one.

Kelly: Okay, so it has to be the magazine "Maintenant."

Rex: What is that?

Kelly: Okay, it means "now," in French. You guys would love it. It's a very popular magazine in Paris. Anyway, I had my own copy here with me tonight when Joey and Aubrey walked in, and she just started acting weird, okay? She kept staring at it, and then all of a sudden she almost fainted. Then she had to go home right away, taking my magazine with her.

Gigi: Maybe she wanted something to read.

Kelly: No. Trust me. If you were there, you would have thought the same thing. Aubrey was desperate to get this magazine.

Rex: What do you think was in there?

Kelly: I don't know, but whatever it was, it must have been so strong that it could have blown her away. Put that together with what you told me and what you heard. She could be building some glossy bonfire right now, for all we know.

Rex: Well, if that's the case, we're already too late.

Kelly: Rex, come on!

Rex: Kelly, it is New Year’s Eve. We are on a date.

Kelly: I will send the both of you to an all-expense-paid vacation to Europe.

Rex: We wouldn't be able to enjoy it if I was in jail.

Kelly: You can do this. I know you can.

Rex: Break into a hotel room while people are still in it?

Kelly: Yes. Think of it as a challenge, okay? Come on. I thought you were a superhero.

Gigi: Okay, normally I wouldn't say anything about your business, but seriously, Kelly, it's New Year's Eve.

Rex: Gigi's right. I'm off duty.

Gigi: Rex is done snooping for the night.

Joey: Where was Rex snooping?

Jessica: You came here to see me in the middle of my sister's wedding?

Marty: I know, but I promise you that once--

Judge Runyon: I have to cover arraignments tonight. Are you two getting married?

John and Natalie: Yes.

John: Just give us a minute.

Jessica: I don't understand it, Marty. If it's not an emergency--

Brody: I'll tell you what. You know, let's go.

Marty: Hey, leave me alone.

Brody: I think she's had a little to drink. You guys go ahead and finish. I'll make sure Marty gets a ride home.

Jessica: What is going on?

John: No idea. Do you know?

Brody: We had a deal, Marty.

Marty: Did we?

Brody: You think I won't do it? I have security footage of you breaking into Dr. Wright's office. I will send copies straight to the hospital board and the police department. You will lose your job, and you will be prosecuted.

Marty: And do I look frightened?

Brody: Don't be stupid. You're throwing away the only thing you have left, and for what? So you can tell Jessica that I slept with Natalie?

Marty: She has a right to know.

Brody: It was one night, one insane night that would never, ever happen again. It is done.

Marty: Are you sure?

Brody: Yes. And what does it matter, anyway? She's having John's baby.

Marty: Right. That's what the test said, didn't it?

Natalie: I have no idea what Marty is doing here.

John: This is bad.

Jessica: You know what? I'm gonna go find out what she wants, so you guys can go on with the wedding.

Natalie: No. Jess--

Jessica: Natalie, it's okay.

Brody: Why are you so hell-bent on blowing up Jessica's life?

Marty: If your insignificant night with Natalie isn't worth mentioning, why is it so big that it could blow up Jessica's life?

Brody: This is not your call to make.

Marty: Why are you so sure that that's what I want to tell Jessica?

Jessica: Marty, I'm here. What did you want to tell me?

Brody: Jess, we're trying--

Jessica: No, it's okay. What's going on?

John: It's ridiculous.

Natalie: Yes, it is.

John: Let's just finish this and get out of here, okay?

Natalie: Okay.

John: Hey, sorry for the delay, Judge. Go ahead.

Judge Runyon: I wish I could, but there's no way I can marry you now.

Natalie: Okay, we're really sorry. All you have to do is just pronounce us husband and wife, and we'll get out of your hair.

Judge Runyon: I wish I could, but I can't.

John: What's the problem?

Judge Runyon: We need your witnesses.

Natalie: They're right outside. They heard us do our vows.

John: They'll sign all the paperwork.

Judge Runyon: And I thought I'd get through one night without you trying to cut corners on the law.

John: Aw, come on. This is not about a crime, Judge.

Judge Runyon: You get your act together, and I'll complete the ceremony.

John: You'll be in your chambers?

Judge Runyon: I have a full docket in night court. I'll be here till morning.

John: Yeah. Thanks... for nothing.

Natalie: This should not be happening.

John: I'm sorry. This is my fault.

Natalie: No. No, you haven't done anything to deserve this.

John: I should have handled Marty better.

Natalie: You've been so patient with her.

John: I knew she was strung-out about what happened with Cole, but I thought she had turned a corner. I should have--I know she's not my responsibility.

Natalie: You cannot apologize for being decent.

John: I know she's caused you a lot of trouble, and no matter what she said about Cole, the truth of the matter is, most of the trouble she's been giving you is because of me, because of us.

Natalie: No. I've set her off myself. I wish--I thought that it was gonna be just us.

John: It is just us--you, me, and our baby, and we are gonna get married tonight.

Brody: Please, go back inside.

Jessica: Not until we get this settled.

Brody: It's okay. I can handle this.

Jessica: Listen, Marty's my friend. We don't need to handle her. I'm sure she wouldn't disrupt a wedding if it wasn't really important.

Marty: I really don't--I don't want to make trouble for you.

Jessica: Oh, I know you don't. I know you don't, but this is a really bad time, so please, just say what you have to say so we can get on with it.

Joey: Let me guess. You're a hotel burglar again.

Kelly: Again?

Joey: Oh, you didn't know? Rex used to break into hotel rooms at the Palace. Cleaned quite a few people out.

Rex: You really need to catch up.

Kelly: You know what? I think you misunderstood Gigi. She didn't mean snooping like sneaking around hotel rooms. No, she was talking about--

Gigi: Dancing.

Joey: Dancing?

Gigi: Yeah. He was doing the snoop.

Kelly: Yeah. It's a new dance.

Gigi: Snoop Dog taught him.

Joey: Snoop Dog taught Rex to dance?

Gigi: Not very well.

Kelly: No. We never want to see it again, do we?

Joey: Oh, I do.

Gigi: Oh, well, go on, Rex. Show him.

Rex: Only for you.

Gigi: Yeah.

Kelly: Yeah, see? Look at it. Whoo! Yeah!

Joey: All right. Please tell me you're not quitting your day job.

Rex: No. I love my day job, especially at this moment.

Kelly: Hey, did you finally reach Aubrey?

Joey: Yes. She says she's contagious. She didn't want me to come over.

Kelly: Oh. Okay. That sounds like a pretty good idea.

Joey: I'm not gonna let a little bug scare me. It's New Year’s Eve. You got to spend it with people you love.

Kelly: Yeah, sure.

Joey: Wish you could do the same.

Kelly: With Kevin? Yes, oh, I know, yes, yes.

Joey: Anyway, happy new year.

Kelly: Happy New Year!

Aubrey: You know what happens if we give up. Are you ready for those consequences?

Man: I don't know.

Aubrey: I've always said you have the harder job. I would feel the same way, watching you with someone else. That's why you can't be here.

Man: Nobody saw me.

Aubrey: But you can't just show up like that. Everything we've worked for could go down the drain. We've come too far to let that happen.

Man: Have we come too far?

Aubrey: It's in the bag. Don't you trust me?

Man: Yes.

Aubrey: Good. Let's stick with the plan. Go back to Europe and wait for me.

Man: No. I'm staying right here in Llanview.

Blair: Two nice chilled bottles of--ow. What is this doing here? Power tools? Those boys!

Cristian: No, Layla, that doesn't explain everything. Bottom line: It's barely morning there, and a guy answered your phone. Yeah, go ahead. Of course it's Steffen. I don't know. How many more guys are you hanging around with? Don't--do not--

Blair: What happened?

Cristian: Layla's cheating on me.

Rex: The snoop?

Gigi: I had to think fast.

Rex: Well, here's an idea. I'm a P.I. I could have been snooping on a case, one that didn't have to do with hotel rooms or a magazine. It didn't have to be that complicated.

Gigi: Then we wouldn't have gotten to see that move.

Rex: What if somebody here with their camera--

Gigi: I already--I actually took care of that.

Rex: Oh, you are gonna pay.

Gigi: I'm ready to pay.

Rex: We're outta here.

Kelly: Hey, hey, hey. Did you guys think about the magazine, give it any thought?

Rex: Yeah. Okay, Aubrey and Joey are holed up in the hotel room for the night. Short of calling in a bomb threat, you're not getting that magazine.

Kelly: You ever seen one of those machines on the phone that disguise the voice?

Rex: Kelly, let it go.

Kelly: They're right in the receiver.

Aubrey: You can't stay here.

Man: Why not?

Aubrey: Because the closer you are to me, the bigger the chance we'd get found out.

Man: You need me here to do damage control. I can keep my eyes on everything else while you're making goo-goo eyes with the idiot.

Aubrey: You're making excuses.

Man: Aubrey, that one picture could have ended everything.

Aubrey: But it didn't. You called me. It was taken care of. But if you stay here, then sometime in some way, we will--

[Knock on door]

Joey: Aubs? It's me.

Marty: This is harder than I thought.

Brody: Then maybe you shouldn't say anything.

Marty: I wish I didn't have to. I wish it weren't true, but it is. Jess, I need to--

Brody: Jess?

Brody: What is it? Are you okay? Are you going into labor?

Jessica: No. It was just--

Natalie: Whoa. What's going on?

Brody: She had a contraction.

Jessica: No.

Brody: It was some kind of pain.

Natalie: What did you do to her?

Jessica: No, it wasn't Marty, Natalie. It was me.

John: Okay, is it gone?

Jessica: Yeah. I think it was just a cramp or--

Brody: Whoa!

Aubrey: You. I told you not to come.

Joey: I couldn't risk you fainting again here all by yourself.

Aubrey: I wasn't. I had my TV and my magazines.

Joey: And now you've got some chicken soup to go with it.

Aubrey: You are so sweet.

Joey: You're not hungry?

Aubrey: No. I just--I'm feeling fine. My stomach's better. I just don't want to risk anything.

Joey: You look like you feel better.

Aubrey: I do. Something in the last hour just revived me.

Joey: Then I am definitely staying.

Aubrey: Yes, you are. Come on. Go get in there. Take off these clothes, and I will be right there.

Joey: Oh.

Aubrey: Burn it.

Man: It won't make a difference. The magazine posts all photos on the website.

Gigi: Rex, honey, I need help. My clothes won't stay on.

Rex: Yeah. Just a sec. I couldn't remember how to spell "main-ten-champ." It's a good thing Kelly told me what it meant. I found the magazine's website.

Gigi: Seriously?

Rex: Yeah. I'll just do a quick check.

Aubrey: Someone could go on "Maintenant's" website and see us together?

Man: They could have till I got a friend of mine to hack into the site and take our photo down.

Gigi: Balsom. Balsom. You know what? I'm getting tired.

Rex: I don't see anything here. I don't even know what I'm looking for. Gige?

Man: Admit it. You need me here.

Joey: Aubrey?

Aubrey: I'll be right there. I'll talk to you later.

Man: Later.

Joey: Who were you talking to?

Aubrey: Oh, the bellboy. I was trying to get us some champagne, but they are all out.

Joey: We don't need champagne.

Rex: This is a waste of time.

Gigi: You think?

Rex: Whatever Aubrey is scared of is not online. Or it's only something she would know. Wow. You would not believe this. There's a picture of Layla here with her hands all over some Eurotrash dude. No wonder Cristian--

Gigi: What were you saying?

Rex: I forgot.

Blair: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. You better...slow down.

Cristian: No, thanks.

Blair: So, Cristian, what happened with Layla?

Cristian: I called the room at the hotel. A guy answered. Steffen.

Blair: Her boss?

Cristian: And once she's caught, she admits it's him, and then there's this story about how they were out late working. Of course, they're always working. Except they had to fit a little partying in there somewhere because the guy was too bombed to drive. So he stayed in her room.

Blair: Come on. That's kind of plausible.

Cristian: The guy's rich, Blair. Couldn't he get his own room?

Blair: I don't know. Maybe they were all booked up or something.

Cristian: And he just had to stay there? It's not like they don't have taxis in France. All you have to do is you go outside, you put your hand up in the air, and you get a taxi. And keep your hands off my fiancée.

Blair: I...I'm out of excuses.

Cristian: You tried.

Blair: I'm sorry.

Cristian: Me, too.

Blair: Well, if Layla did cheat, and I'm not saying that she did, but if she did cheat, you know what she is? She's one stupid woman. Because her man happens to be the most loyal, creative, fun, did I mention hot, and gorgeous--probably the most gorgeous man I know on the face of this earth.

Cristian: You forgot blind. I should've seen this coming. Layla's been pushing me away all fall. And the minute she moved to Paris, it started-- it started ending. And then I went over there and Layla didn't stick around for our weekend together. I should've known then. I guess I did somehow. I almost slept with Gigi, right? I might as well have.

Blair: Oh, come on. You don't mean that.

Cristian: Why not? If Layla can't be faithful, then why should I?

Blair: Rex and Gigi are back together.

Cristian: Oh, yeah. I wouldn't mess with that.

Blair: Good.

Cristian: But I'm still--I still can sleep with anyone else I want.

Blair: Okay.

Cristian: As long as they're available and we understand that I can do what I want.

Blair: Mm-hmm. It's late.

Cristian: Yeah. Yeah, it is.

Blair: And you've actually-- you've polished off about all of that bottle. You probably don't need to be driving. You could just--you can stay here.

Cristian: Yeah. Yeah, you're right.

Blair: Okay, I'll show you to my room. Your room. Yeah.

Cristian: You okay?

Blair: This--that's where I stubbed my toe.

Cristian: Okay, don't stand on it. Here.

Blair: Cristian, I'm all right.

Cristian: Come on.

Blair: Wait, wait, wait, wait. Back it up. Back it up. Champagne.

Cristian: All right.

Blair: Can you get me through here?

Cristian: Can we fit through here? Yes, we can.

Blair: Ha ha ha! You're my hero tonight. Thank you. Oh, look at that. Work it. Yeah. Work it, work it, work it, baby.

Gigi: That was 10 kinds of hot. What are you thinking?

Rex: I bet I can order a copy of that magazine online. Have it shipped--overnighted. It would be here by--no, I can wait and find out tomorrow.

Gigi: Good answer. Ha ha ha!

Marty: It's probably Braxton-Hicks. Let me talk to her.

Brody: No, you stay away from her. We have our own doctor.

John: I'll call an ambulance.

Brody: No, there's no time. I'm gonna take her to the hospital.

Natalie: Yeah, I think that's a really good idea.

Jessica: I'm so sorry I ruined your wedding.

Natalie: No, you didn't. We need to take care of your baby.

Brody: Can you stand?

Jessica: Yeah, I think so. Yeah.

Marty: Keep breathing.

Brody: We can carry you if we need to.

Jessica: Are you sure?

John: Just say the word.

Jessica: No, I'm okay. I'm okay.

John: You coming?

Natalie: I'll follow you in the car. We'll grab our bags.

John: I'll see you over there.

Natalie: Okay. Nice work.

Marty: I should get to the hospital.

Natalie: So you can finish the job?

Marty: No, I didn't say--

Natalie: I'll be damned if I let you near my sister again.

Marty: I'll see you--

Natalie: Now. You'll see me now. You don't get to come in here and pull a stunt like that and just walk away. You and I are going to finish this once and for all.


Langston: On the next "One Life to Live"...

Dorian: David Vickers Buchanan is a dead issue.

David: Dorian!

Marty: Your actions have consequences. Deal with them.

John: She's in the emergency room.

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