OLTL Transcript Wednesday 10/1/08

One Life to Live Transcript Wednesday 10/1/08

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Episode #10285 - "So You Think You Can Be Shane Morasco's Father?"
Written by Elizabeth Page, Ron Carlivati, Carolyn Culliton, Shelly Altman, Janet Iacobuzio, Chris Van Etten, and Anna Theresa Cascio

Provided By Boo
Proofread By Kathy

Michael: Moist sponge. Suture.

Nurse: Dr. Gangemi, B.P. falling.

Dr. Gangemi: Where's that O-neg? I need two units.

Nurse: I'm on it.

Rex: This guy's in bad shape.

Michael: I've got a bleeder, suction.

Bo: Nurse, how is Rex Balsom?

Nurse: Sir, I don't have time.

Bo: Make time. Look, that young man is like a son to me.

Nurse: He's lost a lot of blood. The bullet did a lot of damage.

Shane: You don't know what you're talking about.

Gigi: I know it isn't fair to dump this on you now, honey, but Brody's not your dad. He's not. Your honest to God biological father is Rex.

Shane: You're lying.

Gigi: I'm not. I -- I was, but I'm not now.

Shane: Dad warned me about this. He said that you'd try to make me believe that Rex is my father.

Gigi: Shane, I'm not trying to change the way you feel about Brody. You love him, I get that, but I need you to know the truth. I need you to know, okay? I -- I want you to have the chance to know Rex because he's your dad. Rex is your dad, honey. I was there and I know.

Nurse: O-neg on deck.

Rex: Hey, I'm A-negative. Hello? Somebody -- hey, hey, Michael, dude, it's me, Rex.

Michael: He's got about 500 cc of blood in his belly. I need suction, please.

Dr. Gangemi: We might need a deeper retractor. Right angle clamp, please. Okay, right there, there it is. I got it. Tie -- tie that off.

Rex: They can't hear me. I'm here, I'm yelling, but all they see is me here on my operating table. What the hell am I doing on an operating table?

Gigi's voice: Listen to me, Balsom. We didn't find each other after all this time for me to lose you now. We have a lot to do, a life to plan, a son to raise.

Rex: Oh, man, I'm in trouble.

Announcer: So, you think you can be Shane Morasco's father?

[Applause] Announcer: Now, give it up for our host, Colin MacIver.

[Cheers and applause]

Colin: So, Rex Balsom, you think you can be Shane Morasco's father?

[Applause]

Colin: Cat got your tongue?

Rex: What the hell's going on here?

Colin: I thought you wanted to be Shane Morasco's father.

Rex: Uh, I am his father.

Colin: And that's what we're here to find out, right, audience?

[Cheers and applause]

Rex: You're dead. Colin MacIver's dead.

Colin: What's that say about you, Rex?

Natalie: Please, you've got to let me out of here.

Tess: Okay.

Natalie: Really? You changed your mind? You're going to let me go see Rex at the hospital?

Tess: Sure, why not?

Bo: Jared, did you talk to Natalie? She know what's going on?

Jared: Yeah, I left her a couple of messages. How's Rex?

Roxy: Do you know where Rex Balsom is? No one knows anything! Oh, my God, you called me. Where's Rex?

Bo: He's still in the O.R.

Roxy: This whole time?

Bo: Yeah, he was shot in the gut.

Roxy: Who did this? Who did -- who shot him?

Bo: It was Brody Lovett. This is serious, Roxy.

Roxy: Okay, all right, I'm okay. What happened?

Bo: I don't think Brody knew that it was Rex that he was shooting at. Now, he's done tours in Iraq and Afghanistan. I think it might be post traumatic stress.

Roxy: Is that like shell shock?

Bo: Yes, exactly. Brody had a gun and he didn't know he was shooting at Rex. Rex was trying to protect Gigi and Shane, so he jumped in front of the bullet

Roxy: Oh.

Bo: Roxy, listen to me. Your son is a hero.

Rex: You're dead. Nora killed you.

Colin: Do you want to play, Rex, or do you want to waste what little time you have left? Come on, you're holding us up here.

Audience: Ooh.

Rex: Okay, I don't understand.

Colin: It's simple. Do you want to be Shane Morasco's father?

Rex: Yes, of course.

Colin: Then all you have to do is beat our defending champ. He's a Navy Seal. He enjoys camping, barbequing, and he can fix a carburetor in seconds flat. Ladies and gentlemen, help me welcome Brody Lovett.

[Cheers and applause]

Audience: Brody, Brody, Brody, Brody, Brody, Brody.

Shane: Brody is my dad. I don't care --

[Shane coughs]

Shane: What you say.

Gigi: Here, here's your inhaler.

Shane: Dad told me that you would wreck this whole family just so you could be with Rex.

[Shane coughs]

Gigi: Please, use this, Shane.

Shane: I don't care what you say, Brody is my dad.

Gigi: Okay, wow, uh, I don't blame you for being mad at me. I lied to you, and I -- and I've been lying to you ever since you came home from preschool and asked where your daddy was.

Shane: I don't want to hear this.

Gigi: Well, you're going to have to, I'm sorry. I went to high school with Rex. He was my boyfriend. You know that. And, well, I got pregnant. Only by then, he had left town and I didn't know where he was. And then I met Brody. I told him that I was pregnant by someone else, but it didn't matter to him. He said he loved me and that when he got home on leave, we would -- we would get married and he would take care of us, but then his mom lied to me. She told me that he died.

Shane: If she hadn't done that, would you have married Dad, I mean, Brody?

Gigi: Probably. But he isn't your biological dad, Rex is.

Shane: So, Rex ran out and then Brody stepped up?

Gigi: Kind of.

Shane: Even if I did believe that, which I don't, why would I want a jerk like Rex for a dad?

Audience: Brody, Brody, Brody, Brody, Brody!

[Cheering and applause]

Rex: Look, he shot me. He kidnapped Shane. Do you hear me?

Colin: Ladies and gentlemen, let's see what these two men are fighting for. What will our winner take home?

Rex: Shane?

Colin: Is yours for the rest of your life if you're our winner.

Rex: And if I lose?

Dr. Gangemi: Suture. We're down to two units of whole blood. Moist sponge. I need longer forceps. Mike, clamp the bleeder.

Nurse: B.P. is dropping.

Gigi: When Rex left town, he didn't know I was pregnant. I didn't even know.

Shane: So why did he leave? I'd never do that to somebody, have sex with her and then just take off.

Gigi: Oh, good to know. Uh, but, Shane, I'm not saying that it was the right thing to do; I'm just explaining how it happened. Rex later told me that he left for some sort of family thing. You know, I just -- I didn't know where he was and I couldn't reach him.

Shane: You couldn't call him?

Gigi: We didn't have cell phones back then, or email or anything like that.

Shane: What about his parents, his friends? Somebody had to know where he was. This is all a lie. You've been telling me that Brody Lovett was my father ever since I was little. Why would you do that if it wasn't true?

Colin: We'll get the game under way right after this short break.

Rex: But what if I -- what if I lose? What happens to Shane?

Colin: We'll be right back with our first challenge. Don't you dare go away.

Rex: But what if I lose?

[Cheers and applause]

[Applause]

Colin: Welcome back to "So you think you can be Shane Morasco's father." All right, Rex, you know how the game is played. If you answer the question correctly, our thermographic scoreboard --

[Ascending tone]

Colin: Will put you one step closer to being Shane's daddy. But if you're wrong --

[Descending tone]

Rex: Look, I don't have to answer questions or play a game. I'm Shane's father. Look, I'm your biological father, Shane. It's a fact.

Colin: Rex thinks biology is all that matters. What do you think, Brody?

Brody: Takes a lot more than that, Colin.

[Audience cheers]

Rex: Look, I'll do whatever it takes.

Audience: Prove it.

Colin: You ready for your first challenge, Rex? Good, then let's play "So you think you can be Shane Morasco's father."

[Applause]

Colin: In Shane Morasco's comic book, the villainess is named – A, Loopy Lindsey. B, Marcie the Meddler. C, Jellyfish Jen ---

Rex: Hey, Jen was no jellyfish.

Colin: Or D, Evelyn Evil.

Rex: He named her Evelyn Evil.

Colin: Louder, please.

Rex: D, Evelyn Evil.

[Ascending tone]

[Applause]

Michael: Okay, B.P.'s coming back up. Looks like we got the bleeding pretty much under control in this area.

Dr. Gangemi: All right, now we can do what we came here for.

Michael: You're going after that bullet, Jay?

Dr. Gangemi: We got to do it while he's stable.

Michael: Yeah. Thank God it didn't cause anymore significant damage.

[Locker slams]

Gigi: I couldn't tell you that your dad didn't even know you were alive, so I thought it would be kinder to give you Brody.

[Locker slams]

Gigi: He wanted to be your dad, and I believed he was dead, which meant he couldn't come back and tell you different.

[Locker slams]

Gigi: Shane, stop! It was going to be hard enough for you to grow up without a dad, so I figured I would give you a war hero to talk about to the other kids.

Shane: He came looking for us as soon as he found out his mom lied.

Gigi: He came back here because Adriana brought him here. She figured that it would keep Rex and me apart. And for a long time, she was right. Because I didn't want you -- see, I didn't want you looking at me like you are now.

Shane: Like you're a liar.

Gigi: I'm not lying, Shane.

Shane: Mom, how stupid do you think I am? We took a DNA test. DNA tests don't lie.

Rex: Next question, bring it on.

Colin: Challenge number two – When you married Adriana, where you --- A. In love with Adriana. B, In love with Gigi. C. In love with anything in a skirt.

[Audience groans]

Colin: Or D, in love with yourself and therefore, incapable of being a father.

Rex: It isn't D -- or C.

Colin: That leaves "A," in love with Adriana or B, in love with Gigi. Rex, who did you love when you said those immortal words, "'Til death do us part"?

Layla: Adriana, honey, it's me again. Call me. It's important.

Marcie: Does, uh -- is there any news about Rex?

Layla: I don't know. I just got here.

Marcie: Does Adriana know?

Layla: I left her a couple of messages just to call me. It's not the kind of thing you leave on a voice mail, you know?

Marcie: No, no, of course not. I just -- I can't -- I can't believe this. Not Rex, you know?

Bo: You sure you're okay?

Roxy: Oh, yeah, Bo, I'm okay. I'm good. I am so awful.

Bo: Oh.

Charlie: I'm pretty sure Rex wouldn't even want me to be any part of this, but Roxy was in such bad shape when she heard, I figured I'd better drive her. Does Natalie know?

Jared: Beats me. I was hoping she'd be here with everybody else.

Natalie: Come on, Tess, you've got to let me out of here. You just said I could go to the hospital to see Rex.

Tess: Kidding.

[Tess giggles]

Natalie: Bitch.

Tess: Oh, come on. You didn't really think I was going to let you out, did you?

Natalie: You've got to stop this. This has got to stop.

Tess: I don't -- I don't see why.

Natalie: Okay, if you let me go see Rex, I'll give up Jared. I mean, that's what you want, right? You -- you want us to break up. So, please, just let me go to the hospital to see Rex, and you have my word. I'll never see Jared again.

Roxy: Natalie's still M.I.A. Go figure.

Jared: I wouldn't worry. She'll be here.

Charlie: So you haven't really given up on Natalie.

Jared: You told me not to. You were right. I love her.

Charlie: Any idea why she left, where she might have gone?

Jared: Well, I'm hoping she's in Africa with Viki, but I've left her messages and I keep missing her. I don't know, maybe she doesn't want to call me back.

Charlie: Okay, but wouldn't Jessica have said something if Natalie was with Viki?

[Jared scoffs]

Jared: You'd think so, but I -- I don't know what Jessica would do or wouldn't do.

Charlie: Why? What do you mean?

Jared: I don't know. I can't -- I can't put my finger on it, but something is not right.

Natalie: Tess, please. Please, I just -- I want to see him again one more time, please.

Tess: You know, I've been there. When Nash was dying, I begged Jessica to let me out, but, uh, she didn't, you know. She didn't care about what I wanted and, uh, I don't care about you. Oh, wait, that's not true. That's not true. I want you to suffer. I want you to sit here helpless while Rex bleeds to death, then maybe you will understand just a little bit what it feels like to lose someone you love.

Michael: He's bleeding out. There's something that we're not seeing.

Anesthesiologist: Vital signs falling.

Michael: Suction there. Let's go, come on.

Colin: Rex, I need your answer.

Rex: Okay, what does any of this have to do with being Shane's father?

Colin: Tell him, audience.

[Audience shouts]

Colin: You let Gigi Morasco stand up in church and declare her undying love for you, then you went ahead and married Adriana Cramer. What kind of man does that?

[Audience shouts]

Colin: What kind of father doesn't know the name of the woman he loves?

Rex: I was in love with Adriana, but then Gigi came back into my life.

[Buzzer sounds]

Colin: Ouch. I'm afraid you've run out of time, Rex.

Michael: There it is. You see it? A tear in the liver.

Dr. Gangemi: All right, I think we can get the vessels around it to stop the bleeding. Right angle clamp, please. All right, we gotta do this fast if we're going to control this bleeding. All right, ligature, please.

Michael: Come on, Rex. Don't give up on me now. Come on, you've got too much to live for, man. Stick around, buddy.     

Rex: I was honest with Adriana. She knew how I felt about Gigi.

Colin: Asked and answered, Rex. Next question. When you found out that the baby boy adopted by Michael and Marcie McBain was really Todd Manning’s son did you – A, return him to Todd? B, alert the authorities? C, put more gel in your hair? Or, D, play God with a child's life by keeping him from his father?

Rex: I did what I thought was right.

[Audience jeers]

Gigi: DNA tests don't lie, but people do.

Shane: Are you trying to say that the hospital lied to us?

Gigi: Brody faked the test.

Shane: Yeah, right. I was there.

Gigi: Did you see them swab his cheek.

Shane: He brought his toothbrush.

Gigi: He brought Rex's toothbrush. If the DNA test was real, why was Brody so scared that Rex would take you away? He knew it was fake.

Shane: That's crazy. He would never lie to me.

Gigi: Brody is in a lot of trouble.

Shane: He's in jail and he needs us and he's all alone. He's so messed up, Mom. He needs to know that we love him and that we're on his side.

Gigi: Rex is in really bad shape, okay? He could die. The most important thing right now is for you to understand that Rex is your father.

Shane: You hate Dad because he accidentally shot Rex.

Gigi: No, I --

Shane: I'm never going to stop loving him, and he's never going to stop loving me. I don't care what you say.

[Audience groans]

[Descending tone]

Colin: Ouch, ouch, ouch.

Rex: You're wrong. Michael McBain is a much better father than Todd Manning.

Audience: Ooh.

Colin: So DNA doesn't matter?

Rex: It matters, it's just --

Colin: Not as important as how you treat a child. In which case, isn't our defending champion Lieutenant Brody Lovett a much better father than you could ever be?

[Cheers and applause]

Roxy: Just about everything is working on my last nerve.

Marcie: All right, Rox, just -- just calm down. Try to calm down, okay?

Roxy: I know Rex wasn't always very nice to you.

Marcie: Oh, Roxy, we got past that ages ago, you know? We -- we both loved Jen so much.

Roxy: Yeah, well, it's really sweet, you making him Tommy’s godfather.

Marcie: Well, you know, Michael and I, we knew that if anything happened to Tommy, that, well, Rex would be there for him, protect him.

Roxy: My bad little boy turned into a good one, huh?

Marcie: Hey, he takes after his mother.

Roxy: Yeah, well, he certainly doesn't take after his father. Michael, is he okay?

Colin: You're dying here.

[Music plays]

Colin: That means we have a very special guest. Jen Rappaport, come on down.

[Cheers and applause]

Rex: Jen?

Jen: Hey, Rex.

Rex: You're -- you're dead. And you're dead. So does that mean that I'm not living anymore?

Jen: That's not a question I'm here to ask. You ready, Rex?

Rex: No.

Jen: Which of the following best teaches your son how to be a good man – A, burning a community center down for the insurance money? B, blackmailing R.J. Gannon for a nightclub? C, planning an art heist? Or D, sleeping with my mother?

Lindsay's voice: While you were sleeping with my daughter.

Colin: Ladies and gentlemen, it's Lindsay Rappaport, come on down.

[Cheers and applause]

Rex: Can I get a help line here?

Colin: And we'll be right back after this message from our sponsors. Don't you dare go away.

[Cheers and applause]

Michael: Listen, I'm glad you guys are all here. Dr. Gangemi asked me to come down and speak with you.

Roxy: And who is that?

Michael: He's the head surgeon who's working on Rex.

Roxy: Is he any good?

Michael: Jay is the best. Now, listen. Rex has lost a lot of blood. I mean, the bullet just -- it tore through him. He's hanging in there, but he's got a good fight ahead of him.

Roxy: If that's all there is then he's home free, 'cause he's the toughest little scrapper there ever was. Right, Bo?

Bo: You're right, Rox. Thanks, Mike.

Michael: Yeah. I'll keep you posted.

Roxy: If you let anything happen to him, so help me God, I'm coming after you, McBain.

Michael: Roxy, I promise you I'm doing everything humanly possible for him, okay? Rex is the most loyal friend I've ever had in my life other than Marcie.

Layla: Adriana, it's me again. It's really important that you call me. It's an emergency. Call me.

Charlie: Any word from Natalie?

Jared: No, not yet. But if she knows about this, she'll call. I know she will.

Tess: What's wrong? What, you can't take it when someone you love is dying and the person that wants him dead is standing right in front of your face? Now you know how it feels.

Natalie: Don't you dare compare me to you. I never wanted Nash to die. I loved Nash. He was family to me. And I feel terrible about what happened to him, but you? You don't lose a wink of sleep knowing that I am locked down here like a caged animal while you're sitting there making Jared believe that I left town. And I've heard the things that you've been saying to him about me. But you know what, honey? It ain't working because Jared loves me. Jared will not give up on me. Your plan's a bust. Because when this is all over, it is all over and Jared and I will be stronger than ever. And where will you be? Think that they're going to let you raise Bree and the little one? You're going to be all alone, Tess. Nash is dead. He's not coming back. He's gone and nothing you do to me will change that.

[Cheers and applause]

Rex: Look, Jen, I don't know why they dragged you into this, or you, Lindsay, but I loved you both.

Colin: Kind of a pattern with you, Rex. Two-for-one? What do you think, audience? Does Rex's habit of romancing two women at the same time make him a good dad?

Audience: No!

Rex: Look, but I've changed. Look, I -- I'm not the same person. Jen, tell them. Lindsay?

Colin: So your answer is?

Rex: No, this game is rigged. I'm out of here.

Colin: So that's your answer?

[Audience jeers]

Colin: You think you can be Shane Morasco's father by walking out on the kid when the going gets tough?

[Audience boos]

Gigi: I'm not trying to take what you feel for Brody away or what Brody feels for you.

Shane: So why are you telling me all this?

[Gigi exhales]

Gigi: Because your father, Rex, risked his life to protect you and that's why he got shot. Because he threw himself between you and the bullet because he loves us.

Shane: So why'd he marry Adriana? You told him that you loved him and he went on and married Evelyn Evil.

Gigi: He's divorcing her.

Shane: Oh, he's a real catch, Mom.

Gigi: Shane, I'm doing this for you.

Shane: No, you're doing this for yourself, aren't you? Come on, admit it. You're doing this for you.

Rex: Deal me in.

Colin: Good, let's go. Next question, Rex. When you left your pregnant girlfriend without saying good-bye, you were leaving because – A, you had a college scholarship and wanted to surprise her when you graduated? B, you had a job offer and wanted to surprise her when you bought a house? C, you were a Navy Seal and you were fighting for your country? Or D, you wanted to scam Jessica Buchanan, the heiress, by pretending to be her brother?

Rex: I wanted to scam the heiress.

[Audience jeers]

Rex: Okay, but it's the truth.

Colin: But it's wrong, wrong, wrong, Rex. Ouch, ouch, ouch.

[Descending tone]

Anesthesiologist: We're losing him.

Dr. Gangemi: All right, I want blood and platelets running wide. We've got to replace his volume.

Michael: There's too much bleeding -- I can't see where it's coming from.

Anesthesiologist: Starting to Brady down.

Michael: Don't do this, Rex. You stay with me. Do you hear me? You stay with me.

Colin: It's not looking too good for you, Rex. Not good at all, is it, ladies?

[Audience jeers]

Rex: What kind of people are you?

Colin: You ready for your next question, Rex? Good. The stuffed porcupine your mother keeps at the Angel Square Hotel in which she once hid a terrible secret is nicknamed – A, Fred the magic frog? B, David Vickers? C --

Rex: Morris, Morris. It's Morris.

[Ascending tone]

Colin: Good job, Rex. You're not dead yet. But you have to get this next question right, or you'll never be Shane Morasco's father or anyone else's father. It'll be all over for you, Rex.

Shane: I'm sorry. I don't Rex to be my father. I want Brody.

Gigi: You're coming in loud and clear. I should have told the truth a long time ago and spared us all a lot of heartache.

[Gigi sighs]

Gigi: Okay, here's the deal. I am your mother and I am looking out for you, and I don't want you to hate yourself 20 years from now.

Shane: I'm not going to hate myself.

Gigi: If Rex dies and you didn't at least take the opportunity to say good-bye to him, trust me, you will hate yourself.

Shane: No.

Gigi: Any boy who already knows that he would never leave a girl he loves is going to hate himself if he walks out on the man who saved his life. And that is a fact.

Rex: Okay, I'm ready when you are, Colin.

Colin: Ladies? That's my favorite part. Rex, take a look at these eight faces --

Colin: Rex Balsom, this is your last question, your final challenge. If you can't answer this question, it'll be all over for you.

[Cheers and applause]

Bo: You know, I could never figure out why you lied to Balsom about being his dad.

Charlie: It's just a long, dumb story.

Bo: That's too bad. Because it made him real happy to think of you in that role.

Charlie: Yeah. I'm just glad that you were there when he found out the truth. Rex is very lucky to have you in his corner.

Bo: I just wish there was something I could do for him right now.

Gigi: When Rex gets out of surgery, I want us to go see him. Can you do that? Can you go see your father?

Colin: Rex Balsom?

Rex: Yes?

Colin: So you think you can be Shane Morasco's father?

Rex: Well, I know I'm his father.

Colin: Ah, yes, but here's the big question. Do you know your own father? Rex Balsom, for the whole ball of wax, can you tell me which of the eight men is your biological father?

Natalie: Do you think anyone could convince Nash to give up on you or you to give up on him?

Tess: Nash is dead, Natalie, and you just rubbed it in my face!

Natalie: Yeah, because you've got to stop this. You've got to stop this. Take care of your babies. Take care of Bree. Think about the future.

Tess: It is so much fun to watch you suffer.

Natalie: You're the one who's suffering.

Tess: No, no I'm not. You see, I got to say good-bye to Nash. He was in his coffin, but he heard every word I said. And you are never going to get to say good-bye to Rex because you are never going to leave this room. So good night, Nattie.

Natalie: Wait, what are you doing?

Tess: Well, I don't want you gawking at me while I'm sleeping. That would be creepy.

Natalie: What if Jared comes back?

Tess: Oh, with news about Rex? Well, I guess you're just going to have to sweat it out until morning, aren't you? Sweet dreams.

Dr. Gangemi: Are those lines open?

Michael: Wide open.

Layla: Okay, Adriana, you have to call me. It's Rex. It's an emergency.

Roxy: Hey, Layla, come here. Look, I saw this on TV once. If we all pray together, you know, like in a group, maybe it'll help. Come on. Look, I'll try anything. Hey, guys, we really need you.

Rex: I -- I don't know. I don't know who my father is.

Colin: You have one lifeline left, Rex. Would you like to make a call?

Rex: Yes, absolutely. I'd like to call my mother.

Woman: Yay, Mom!

[Game show question overlapping]

Anesthesiologist: B.P is still dropping, 70 over palp.

Dr. Gangemi: I need that epi now.

Michael: We're losing him. We're losing him.

Colin: Thank you, Jen. Thank you, ladies.

[Applause]

Colin: I'm going to call your mom.

[Phone rings]

Roxy: Hello?

Colin: Is this Rex's mom?

Roxy: Oh, my God. Don't tell me it's Colin MacIver.

Colin: Is this Roxanne?

Roxy: I love you. I love your show "So you think you can be Shane Morasco's father?" Right?

Rex: That's her.

Roxy: That Brody Lovett is a real catch.

Rex: Mom, it's me.

Roxy: Hey, baby, what are you doing there?

Colin: Good question. 30 seconds, Rex.

Rex: Okay, Mom, listen, we only have 30 seconds. Which one of these guys is my father? Bo Buchanan, Charlie Banks, R.J. Gannon, David Vickers -- the guy, not the dog -- Mitch Laurence, Snoop Dogg, Cain Rogan, or Jackie McNaughton?

Roxy: I never slept with David Vickers -- the guy, not the dog. Not that I ever slept with a dog, either.

Rex: Mom, tick tick. Who's my daddy?

Roxy: You know, honey, I can't tell you that.

Rex: Mom, if you don't tell me, I'll die and you'll lose a grandson. Do you hear me?

Roxy: God, hello? Are you there? Watch over Rex and bring him back, okay?

Gigi: Any word?

Bo: He's still in the O.R.

Rex: Okay, Roxy, you've got to tell me who my father is. It's a matter of life and death.

Roxy: Okay, okay, since you put it that way, I'll tell you. Your dad is --

[Click and dial tone]

Rex: No, no!

Colin: Ooh, ouch. Sorry, Rex, time's up. I guess you're going to have to figure it out on your own. But you better hurry -- your whole life is riding on this, not to mention your son's future. So, Rex, who's your daddy?

Michael: We can't keep up with the volume depletion.

Dr. Gangemi: [Indistinct]

Michael: Where's the O-neg? I need 2 units.

Anesthesiologist: Pressure is still dropping.

Rex: Why do I have to know who my father is? What the hell difference does that make?

Colin: How are you going to learn to be a father if you don't know who fathered you? I need an answer, Rex, or I'm afraid I'm going to have to award the title to our returning champion.

[Cheers and applause]

[Buzzer sounds]

Colin: Oh, ouch. Rex, I'm sorry. Time is up.

Rex: It's Bo. Bo Buchanan is my father. Final answer, Bo Buchanan is my father.

Colin: Wrong, Rex. Dead wrong. I'm sorry, Rex, but you can't be Shane Morasco's father. But Brody Lovett can!

[Cheers and applause]

Rex: Wait.

Colin: Sorry, Rex. You've flatlined.

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