OLTL Transcript Monday 11/26/07

One Life to Live Transcript Monday 11/26/07


Provided By Suzanne
Proofread by Kathy

Pilot: We're anticipating landing in Dublin 18 minutes ahead of schedule. Happy Thanksgiving.

Ramsey: Where's my peanuts?

John: Haven't you heard? Airlines are economizing.

Ramsey: Exactly. What are you reading? You hoping to make time with this woman by memorizing her dead husband's poems -- assuming we find her?

John: We'll find her.

Ramsey: You don't strike me as the poetic type, John -- fact is, you're downright close-mouthed.

John: No, not true, Lee. I think words are terrific, they're sacred -- that's why I try not to waste them.

Ramsey: Okay. Yes or no -- there's something in that book you think is going to lead us to Marty Saybrooke and her son, right?

Cole: Well, I always wanted to see Ireland, but not from the inside of a padlocked room. I really hate this place.

Marty: Your father would hate to hear you say that.

Cole: This is about him, isn't it?

Marty: Yes.

Cole: What aren't you telling me?

Man: Well?

Cole: "Well?" Well, what? What do you want from us?

Marty: Cole, shh, please.

Man: Your mom's had plenty of time to think about what I asked her. So now I'll be needing you to give us the names.

Cole: Whose names?

Man: If I knew, you wouldn't be here.

Marty: I can't help you.

Man: Sooner or later, one way or the other, you will. I'll be back.

[Door closes]

Cole: What names, Mom?

Marty: I don't know!

Cole: But you do know something!

Marty: Yes, yes, okay? This is about your father. When he died, he died with a very big secret.

Starr: Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on. Come on -- damn it!

Blair: Well, now, is that any way to talk? Happy Thanksgiving.

Starr: You guys got a flight home? I can't believe it.

Todd: Sorry it took us so long.

Blair: It is Thanksgiving.

Starr: No, it's okay. It's not like I have a whole lot to be thankful for.

Blair: Well, we're here now, sweetheart, and we're not going anywhere, all right?

Nash: Your father and the "previously undressed now well-dressed" Dr. Lord are in there together.

Natalie: Great. Ready for some fireworks?

Nash: Are you?

Natalie: What do you mean?

Nash: I need to talk to you about your Mr. Banks.

Jared: Disposing of the evidence, Nigel?

Nigel: I'm quite sure I have no idea what you're talking about.

Jared: Well, either you're into bondage or --

Nigel: Or?

Jared: Look, I know everything, okay?

Nigel: I highly doubt that -- Sir.

Jared: Oh. Well, I do know this much -- David Vickers is Asa's long-lost son, and you cut a deal with Asa's ex, number -- nine and 10, was it? -- Ms. Alex Olanov Vickers Buchanan soon-to-be Olanov again, just so she won't say a word.

Nigel: I have no idea what you're talking about.

Jared: Bad deal, Nigel -- I was outside listening to everything. Now, let's talk turkey. What are you going to do for me?

[Alex gasps]

David: Whoa. Why so jumpy, pumpkin? Where are you going?

Alex: Uh -- I'm leaving you.

David: Why is that?

Alex: You already cheated on me with Dorian Lord.

Clint: What?

Dorian: I'm leaving now. I hope you're happy.

Clint: Happier than I've been in months.

David: Okay, fine, I slept with Dorian. I was weak. It didn't mean anything.

Alex: That old line.

David: Besides, it's not technically cheating, because you and I haven't slept together.

Alex: But we took vows -- mere days ago. And now you're flouting them.

David: Oh, but, honey, I only slept with Dorian because I was respecting your sexual addiction issues.

Alex: My issues pale in comparison to your issues.

David: But, Alex, I love you.

Alex: Well, I am deeply wounded. So it's over. Excuse me.

David: All right -- uh -- so our relationship is over. Um -- I'm devastated, and I'll try to be strong and move forward. But since our marriage is over, aren't you forgetting something?

Alex: I don't think so. I packed really light, with the exception of you.

David: What about those papers in your bag?

Jared: Now, Alex got a yacht and an island to keep her trap shut. She's probably long gone by now.

Nigel: If there is a God.

Jared: No, I'm just saying that your secret is safe with her. It's me you must deal with now.

Nigel: I have been suspicious of you since you first showed up at the front door of Mr. Buchanan's home. It seems I was correct in my suspicions.

Jared: You do have to admit, Nigel, I hold all the cards here. And, well, this family knows exactly what happened last time I played in a high-stakes game.

Nigel: You want to bet the ranch? Speak to Chuck.

Jared: No living person who heard a secret like this would not use it to his advantage.

Nigel: I would not.

Jared: Maybe you're not human, then.

Nigel: Are you? Do you care anything for this family?

Jared: I don't want to hurt Renee, or Natalie.

Nigel: But for the right price --

Jared: This family owes me, Nigel.

Nigel: What do you want in exchange for your silence? Keeping in mind I'm fresh out of land rights and yachts.

Jared: What I want won't cost you a day's wage.

Nigel: A loyal manservant for life, perhaps?

[Jared chuckles]

Jared: Not unless it's part of the package.

Nigel: What package?

Jared: The envelope that Asa left you in his will.

Nigel: That is to be guarded by me till such time I deem it appropriate to show it to his son.

Jared: Hmm. I'd say the appropriate time is now.

Natalie: And what exactly do you think you're going to tell me about Jared that I don't already know?

Nash: Well, I guess that depends if you've bunked with him yet.

Natalie: Okay, we've all bunked with him the last couple of nights.

Nash: Yeah -- no, I've been living under the same roof with him. If you bunked with him, you know that he snores. You'll know that he leaves the lid open, and chews with his mouth open, that he eats anchovies on his pizza, that he watches golf on TV.

Natalie: Great, thanks for the heads-up.

Nash: Look, I know it sounds like superficial stuff.

Natalie: Yeah.

Nash: But it all leads to this. He is an inconsiderate, self-serving, tasteless son of a bitch.

Natalie: Did you and Jess decide to tag-team me? Because I got this same lecture from her a little while ago about how Jared's dangerous, bad news.

Nash: You felt the same way until something happened last night.

Natalie: I just -- I saw Jared in a different way. Just, he was different. He was different.

Nash: And you thought that you could show him a different light?

Natalie: Yeah, maybe I can.

Dorian: Okey-dokey. I'm going to give you one last chance to talk me out of leaving.

Clint: Well, I can't think of a single reason for you to stay.

Dorian: Don't you even want to give me a chance to tell my side of the story?

Clint: You have something new? Because I've already heard that you're oh so sorry for inviting David Vickers to climb into your bed.

Dorian: I didn't invite him.

Clint: In a house of mourning -- for God's sake, Dorian.

Dorian: You didn't seem as if you were in mourning when you were kissing Nora, and believe me, if I hadn't seen that --

Clint: Let's not do this, all right? Because this is not how adults behave.

Dorian: No, it isnít. Why did you kiss her?

Clint: I don't know. It was a mistake.

Dorian: Is that how you feel now?

Clint: I told Nora that I loved you.

Dorian: Well, if that's true, then why are you so eager to have me leave?

Clint: Because I don't want to be played for a fool.

Dorian: I told you that going to bed with David was a mistake. Now, if that's an acceptable excuse for you, why doesn't it work for me?

Clint: What you did wasn't a mistake, it was a decision. You decided to retaliate by going to bed with a man that you know I despise. Vickers extorted me for $10 million to save my daughter.

Dorian: Well, he gave it back, didn't he?

Clint: Let's just call this what it is, shall we?

Dorian: A big problem. But don't we have the beginning of a solution?

Clint: No -- it's the end of us.

Ramsey: You know, if we are working together, it might help if we actually shared information.

John: Yeah, exactly, and I know you got a lot from Langley that you ain't giving up.

Ramsey: Classified. You're not F.B.I. anymore.

John: First thing we do is, we find this informant of yours. Then we have a little face-to-face.

Ramsey: That's your plan?

John: I got a plan. You?

Ramsey: Yeah. You follow my lead. Go back to your love poems.

Cole: Why is this happening to us? After all this time, why is this happening to us?

Marty: I don't know, okay? The guy outside isn't really rational! I think he's living in a world before the ceasefire.

Cole: How does he know Dad? Mom?

Marty: I have been keeping something from you. I was trying to protect you, okay? It's about how your father died.

Cole: Dad died in a car crash.

Marty: I wish I could make this easier for you. But your dad didn't die in a car crash. He was murdered.

Starr: You know, I'm glad you guys are here, but what about my baby brother?

Todd: Oh, well, I've got PIs fanned out all over Texas and beyond. So if they find something concrete, I'll be right back out there.

Blair: And by then, Cole should be home, you know?

Starr: You know, I set up this website to see if anybody's seen him.

Blair: Well, I want to see it, okay? Can you show it to me?

Starr: Yeah, I will. But nobody's posted anything. It's like he just vanished.

Blair: Well, speaking of vanished -- where is Carlotta?

Starr: Oh, she had this family thing, and she wanted me to go. I just wasn't up for it.

Todd: And what happened to Dorian?

Blair: You know what? I never would have left if I had known Dorian was going to traipse off to Texas to go hunt down Clint Buchanan.

Dorian: It can't be the end. Not of us.

Clint: It is, so let's just cut our losses.

Dorian: Clint, all right, I -- I should have come here to Texas when you asked me to, but I just -- I was so worried about Langston.

Clint: Yeah, where is Langston, by the way, huh? Or doesn't it matter quite so much once you decided that I was cheating on you with Nora, and you cut your losses? Dorian, what you did, who you did it with -- I can't forgive that. And I sure as hell can't forget it.

Alex: Papers? What papers? I don't have any papers.

David: Our prenup.

Alex: Oh, that.

David: Yeah. And don't you try to wiggle out of it. There's no adultery clause in there for either one of us, so what's yours is now half mine.

Alex: I suppose you want your half.

David: [Spanish accent] Fork it over, chica.

[Alex laughs]

Alex: There's your copy. Is everything in order?

David: [Normal voice] Uh -- far as I can tell.

Alex: Good. The only problem is, 50% of nothing is nothing, isn't it?

Nigel: The bank of Buchanan is closed.

Jared: I'm not asking for money, Nigel.

Nigel: The letter is safely locked away in a vault.

Jared: Nigel, you lie. It's in your coat pocket.

Nigel: Wherever the letter is, it is not meant for your eyes. It is for Mr. Buchanan's son, and you are not that.

Jared: No, that is the man that Clint tried to kill this morning.

Nigel: What?

Jared: Don't you talk to the other servants? He shoved a shotgun in the face of this Vickers guy after he found him in bed with Dr. Lord.

Nigel: Good grief.

Jared: And I think Clint should know that that's his brother before he tries killing him again, don't you think?

Nigel: No, I don't think.

Jared: Oh. Bully for you. If you can stand strong, so can I.

Nigel: Where are you going?

Jared: To explain to anyone who will listen that you've decided to take matters into your own hands, and that you know that David Vickers is Asa's long-lost son, and you've decided to keep it quiet, well, for their own good.

Nigel: Wait.

Jared: Ah.

Marty's voice: And then I heard Patrickís voice. He was reciting from the poem that he had written me. "Weep no more as I am beside you, always."

Marty: And those were the last words your father said to me.

Cole: So you heard them shoot him?

Marty: Yes.

Cole: Why'd you tell me it was an accident?

Marty: Because I didn't want that to be your last memory of him. He went to Ireland to protect us. I was trying to protect you.

Cole: From what?

Marty: From this.

Cole: So if we'd never been kidnapped, what -- would you never tell me what really happened?

Marty: No, I had already decided that I was going to tell you.

Cole: Why?

Marty: Because of John.

Ramsey: What a surprise. Rubber chicken. Hmm. Any luck?

John: Oh, I like to make my own luck.

[Todd mumbles]

Blair: Oh --

Todd: What kind of pie is that?

Blair: It's mincemeat.

Todd: Ugh. It sucks.

Blair: Well, don't tell Carlotta that, okay?

Starr: Hey, Mom, is it true that every day that goes by, there's less of a chance of Cole being okay?

Todd: Well, you know, I was gone for some time, sweetheart -- I turned out okay. You know, Starr, I supported half the private investigators' union thus far. I can certainly support the other half and go look for Cole.

Starr: Really? But I thought you hate Cole.

Todd: Well, he's important to you, so it's important to me.

Starr: Thanks, Dad. I love you.

Blair: It's tough when you -- you love someone and they could be in danger, sweetie.

Todd: Yeah. But don't give up, okay? You didn't give up on me, did you? Do the same thing for him. Don't give up on him.

Natalie: I know that Jared's made you and Jess miserable.

Nash: "Miserable"? He threatened to send your sister to prison and separate her from her child.

Natalie: Okay, but he's not going to do that.

Nash: Oh, thank heavens. How about my shares of the vineyard? You going to get me those back?

Natalie: I don't know. But honestly, after what Tess did to him, don't you think he deserves a little something?

Nash: Hmm. There it is. Tell me, while he was baring his soul to you underneath the stars, did he happen to mention anything about getting his job back at B.E.?

Natalie: No, actually, he didnít. All he wants is his old life back before Tess framed him. I don't think there's anything wrong with that.

Dorian: I'm not asking you to forgive or forget. I'm asking you for another chance.

Clint: And I'm saying no.

Dorian: You know, there is one thing that I don't understand. You say that you stopped what might have happened between you and Nora because you love me. Well, that was just last night. So when -- I mean, at what precise hour did you suddenly stop loving me?

Clint: I havenít. Not yet. But, Dorian, I hate the things that you do. You come all the way to Texas to be with me, and before you even say a word to me, you're in bed with David Vickers.

Dorian: You were in the arms of another woman, a woman who's been trying to get between us ever since we got together.

Clint: So you went to David -- for comfort, and/or revenge, and let's -- let's not even get into the fact that the man was just married.

Dorian: Well, I -- I wasn't thinking straight.

Clint: Yeah, because you can't resist that guy.

Dorian: Oh. You're jealous.

Clint: And does that make you happy?

Dorian: Well, kind of. Because it shows you still care about me more than you want to.

Clint: What about you and David?

Dorian: There is no me and David.

Clint: Never again? Are you sure about that?

David: You have nothing?

Alex: Tap city.

David: You're bluffing. You're just jealous because I slept with Dorian, and now you're ego's bruised.

[Alex laughs]

Alex: Do you really think I'm that fragile?

David: What about all that stuff you said about Dickie? The penthouse? The 90-foot yacht?

Alex: And you bought every word. Bye-bye.

David: Wait -- hold on a second. Hold it. How did you pay your way into dreamland?

Alex: Sold my car.

David: What about that wad of money you flashed in front of my face?

Alex: My last $300, mostly ones. Look, I'm broke. Here's my bank statement.

David: "$57 in checking"?

Alex: My credit card statement.

David: There's more than one comma.

Alex: But the 20% APR -- I think your half should put a nice dent in that.

David: I owe you money?

Alex: Well, the prenup says --

David: Wait a second! You married me so I'd pay off your credit card bills?

Alex: Oh, no, no, no, honey. Of course not. I married you so that I could have all of this 24 hours a day. And I knew you liked money as much as I liked money, and I thought -- oh -- I lied. But I thought if we came here, maybe Asa had left me something, and then we could live happily ever after, but we were just out of luck.

David: Oh. I'm poor again.

Alex: You really shouldn't have given Clint that last 10 mil.

David: Now what the hell am I going to do?

Alex: Maybe you could ask the Buchanans for a loan. I mean, you gave half of your liver to Jessica already -- you're practically family.

Jared: Did you read this?

Nigel: What do you think? Well?

Jared: Nigel -- well, it's another seat on the Buchanan Enterprises board.

Nigel: Good. Good for Mr. Asa.

Jared: Ah, good for me.

Nigel: How's that? I'm sure the letter expressly states the seat is for his son.

Jared: I want it.

Nigel: I'm quite sure you do, but you can't have it. You're not Mr. Buchanan's son.

Jared: No, but I could be.

Nigel: You can't just be Mr. Buchanan's son.

Jared: You should be thrilled, Nigel. I've taken the responsibility of Asa's deep, dark secret completely off your head.

Nigel: Are you telling me that you'll keep this information under the 10-gallon hat you'll be forced to don if I allow you to carry out this charade?

Jared: Well, that would solve everyone's problem, wouldn't it?

Nigel: Trading one charlatan for a bigger one?

[Jared chuckles]

Jared: Asa Buchanan was the biggest charlatan that ever lived. I'm just a chip off the old block.

Nigel: Give me one good reason why you make a better candidate to be the Buchanan heir than Mr. Vickers does.

Jared: I'll give you 10. One -- do you want B.E. to be a success, because I am an experienced businessman who actually knows what he's doing, unlike Vickers who will ask for the corner office so he can watch internet porn all day. Two -- I make Renee happy -- very, very happy.

Nigel: Please, spare me the details.

Jared: Bo and Clint and everyone else in this family hate Vickers.

Nigel: Everyone in this family hates you, too -- at least Vickers saved Jessica's life. And what will you do when Ms. Olanov hears you have been proclaimed as the Buchanan heir?

Jared: I'm guessing she's heading for a quickie divorce right about now so she's not forced to share the profits from the sale of the island and the yacht with Vickers. And if she finds out that I took Vickers' spot, well, it'll be too late. She won't be his wife anymore.

Nigel: What's number four?

Jared: You, Nigel -- you hold the cards now. And if I screw up, you can out me whenever your fancy strikes you.

Nigel: Then the Buchanans will disown me forever.

Jared: Still your choice -- ahem. Five -- don't even get me started on the trouble I will cause for Jessica after what she did to me. As Asa always said, "Keep your back to the wall and an open eye on everyone else." Six -- did I mention that --

Nigel: All right, all right. If anyone learns if I was a part of all this --

Jared: Who's going to say anything except me, and why would I do that? I can so do this, Nigel. I'm even a cowboys' fan -- speaking of which, I'm missing the game.

[Jared chuckles]

Nigel: Everything's a game for you, isn't it?

Jared: Not this. You know, Renee keeps telling me how much I remind her of Asa. I'm only surprised I didn't think of it sooner. It's perfect.

Nigel: Is it? I believe you're forgetting one thing. It's rather important -- or rather, she is.

Natalie: Look, I'm -- I'm sorry. I know that you're just saying all this because you care. But you said so yourself -- you were a lot like Jared two years ago. I mean, did you really think that you were going to be a dad and a husband and a vineyard owner?

Nash: Hey, Jared's already a vineyard owner, isn't he?

Natalie: Oh. Yeah, cool, so when we get married, it'll be all back in the family.

Nash: "Married" -- you crazy.

Natalie: No -- listen -- all I'm saying is you found Jessica. She changed your life.

Nash: And you think you can do that for Jared?

Natalie: I know I can.

Dorian: Yes, I am sure. It's just that last night, I felt so rejected and then David was there and I didn't feel so rejected anymore.

Clint: All right, stop it. Stop this because for me, no amount of discussion can excuse what you did. We have got to stop talking -- or better yet, you need to start talking to David.

Dorian: I don't want to talk to him. I could've married him if I wanted to, and I didnít. I don't want him in my life -- ever again.

Clint: Well, it's too bad you didn't realize that before you went to bed with him.

David: I can't ask the Buchanans for a loan -- they despise me.

Alex: What about Dorian? Ask her.

David: No, I can't do that, not after I ruined things between her and Clint.

Alex: She'll forgive you. Whisk her away and woo her. She's loaded, right?

David: Why do you suddenly care what I do?

Alex: Just trying to help.

David: Alex, after all the love that we shared over the last week, the least you can do is give me a lift out of here. I'm going to go pack my bag.

Alex: No, you're not who I'm going to share my deserted island with.

David: "Island"? You have an island?

Blair: You know, you're looking mighty thin. Have you not been eating, Starr?

Starr: I just keep thinking about Cole and his Thanksgiving, Mom. He had this whole food drive at school and he raised canned goods and money for needy families, and now he could be dead, Mom!

Blair: Okay, Starr --

Starr: I don't know what to do!

Blair: Starr, Starr, Starr. Pull it together, all right? He would want you to take care of yourself. You got to eat. You got to eat.

Starr: I know. I know. Um -- I'm going to go outside and look at the stars. Maybe he'll be looking at them, too.

Blair: And I'm sure he'll be thinking of you. It's going to be okay.

Starr: Hey, Dad? Um -- thank you. And I'll wish on a star for baby brother, too.

Blair: Got a pretty special daughter.

Blair: I think it's going to be okay, you know, now that we're -- we're here. We're going to find your son, bring him home, and be here for our family, okay? I promise you.

Cole: Well, at least John knows everything you know, right, so he'll know where to start looking for us?

Marty: That is what I am counting on. Are you upset with me for keeping this from you?

Cole: You're all I've got -- you and Starr. If anything -- anything happened to either one of you --

Man: It's Thanksgiving in America, isn't it? You be thankful you're still alive, but you won't be tomorrow.

Marty: Yeah, I know -- if I don't tell you the names, but I don't -- I don't know.

Man: Yeah. By crack of dawn, or one of you is going to watch the other die.

Cole: Ah!

[Marty gasps]

Cole: Mom, think! What is he talking about?

Marty: Look, sweetie, I don't know, okay? Your father made sure to keep everything from me! He didn't tell me anything -- I don't know anything! I don't know what they want!

Dorian: So that's it?

Clint: We're going to run into each other from time to time. I'd like to think that we can be civil.

Dorian: You're really asking me to leave?

Clint: I should've ended it a long time ago, because there is just too much history, too many obstacles for us to make it work.

Dorian: Why didn't you?

Clint: Because I cared enough about you to give it a try.

Dorian: Past tense?

Dorian: I cared enough about you, too, to give it a try.

Dorian: I still do.

Natalie: I guess it's safe to go check on my dad now.

Nash: Good luck.

Natalie: Thank you -- for everything.

Nash: Be careful.

Natalie: I will.

Alex: My life -- my life was a deserted island and I was counting on you to heal me.

[David raspberries]

David: Now it's my fault, huh? So I get nothing, not even a ride out of here?

Alex: It was fun while it lasted. Good luck.

David: Yeah, well, good luck to you, too, dropping that embarrassing addiction of yours.

Alex: Thank you, darling. Don't forget -- what doesn't kill you makes you stronger!

Jared: Who's "she"?

Nigel: Don't tell me this hasn't entered your mind. Perhaps you're not as bright as all that. A woman who will be unavailable to you on any level if you will take on the mantle of Jared Buchanan -- who has a seat on the board herself, by the way. Are you willing to give up Ms. Natalie Buchanan for this?

Nigel: If you're Mr. Buchanan's son, surely you realize that makes you Natalie's uncle. Now, she enjoys living dangerously but not that dangerously. This will really crystallize your priorities, Mr. Banks. What's more important to you -- love, or money?

Natalie: Dad, you okay?

Clint: No, but I will be.

Natalie: Want to talk to me? Because, you know, I am the queen of broken hearts.

Clint: You're going to be fine.

Natalie: I know -- we both are.

Clint: Why are you still here?

David: My wife left me. I have no way to get back to Llanview.

Clint: Well, then you're still going to be staying somewhere in Texas, but it sure as hell won't be here.

David: Not to worry -- I never stay where I'm not wanted -- for long.

Clint: Tell you what -- Dorian's on her way out of town. Why don't you try and catch her? Who knows -- maybe you'll get lucky again.

David: Great idea.

Alex: I wonder if they still have that cute masseur down there in St. Blazes.


Alex: I don't see anything. Oh. What's one more dead coyote?

On the next "One Life to Live" --

Viki: Everything all right?

Charlie: I think she found my son.

Natalie: What's the problem? You change your mind about us?

Antonio: You can go home, too.

Talia: And what if I'd rather stay?

Cristian: I missed you.

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