One Life to Live Transcript Friday 11/9/07
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[Jefferson Parish, Louisiana]
Marty: I guess I could offer you something, but --
Todd: Bet you could.
Todd: Forget it's a hotel room.
Marty: Yeah. There's always the minibar, but I guess it's a little early for that.
Todd: Well, Blair should be back soon. Really no reason for me to stay here in your little love nest.
Marty: Look, I don't want to stay in a room with you, either, ok, but we're going to have to learn how. We don't have a choice.
Ramsey: Too late, John. Marcie's gone. And you're just catching up.
John: Just think how much further along I'd be if I had a federal agency at my beck and call -- or if I hadn't been thrown in jail.
Ramsey: Uh-huh. Well, no one to bail you out. It's just you and me.
Gigi: Not so fast.
Viki: Ok, come on, girls, I got tables to close, all right?
Gigi: Noelle's taking over your tables.
Noelle: You're not doing anything but getting ready for your big date with Charlie.
Viki: Oh, come on, there's plenty of time.
Gigi: Really? Have you not noticed that the shower at the bon suites just kind of drips like a leaky faucet?
Noelle: Takes at least half an hour to wash your hair.
Moe: Is anybody going to pick up these apps for table six?
Viki: Yeah, Moe, I'm on it! Just -- what? Just as soon --
Gigi: Nope, nope, nope --
Viki: Oh, come on, girls. I know you're trying to be helpful, but this is ridiculous.
Viki: See you later. Huh.
Gigi: God, when it comes to dating, that woman is seriously out of practice.
David: Perfect day for a wedding. Threatening skies, an invigorating nip in the air --
Man: You're sure about this, right? You really want to get married right here at dreamland, today?
Alex's voice: He had to give me the deed to his place in key west. And then the cars, the jewelry, the little bed-sit on park, and the house in Bridgehampton.
Nigel's voice: Mr. Buchanan has another son. It's David Vickers.
David and Alex: Positive.
Clint: Could you please get to the reading of Pa's will?
Beaver: No, no, sir, not I. This comes straight from Mr. Asa Buchanan himself. Nigel, do you have the disc there?
Nigel: Yes, sir, indeed, I do.
Asa: Well, a big hello to all my family. I'm glad you could all make it. If you're watching this, it's because you're at my ranch in Texas. And I've cashed in my chips. No playing possum this time around. This time, it's the real deal. Now, we're here to divvy up everything I've ever bled for. My family, each and every last one of them, is going to get what's coming to them.
John: I just want my car and my cell phone.
Ramsey: Is that right?
John: Yep. Hey, Wendell, how's it going?
Wendell: Sorry to make you traipse all the way down here. I'd have brought your car over the motel, but I got held up.
John: Yeah, I can see you got company. Everything all right? My -- my car broke down, lee. I was lucky to find an honest mechanic.
Wendell: That car of yours is running real good now.
Ramsey: Great! Then you can get back on the road now.
John: Is there a problem here?
Celia: Actually, there is. This man was --
Ramsey: You, quiet. You, get going.
John: I'm fine just where I am.
Todd: You want to make friends, Marty?
Todd: Well, ok, then. Bye.
Marty: Just wait, ok? Look, our kids are in love with each other, and if I am willing to put our history aside, well, I think you should be able to make a little bit of an effort. It's the least you can do for their sake.
Starr: Cole? Cole? Cole! Shoot!
Asa: Before we get to the meaty stuff, let's start with a bunch of the smaller items. Small but meaningful to me. First, to Renee. I lost this baby in a poker game many years ago back in Nevada. It was the same time I lost -- I lost my heart to you. It took me a lot of years, but I finally managed to track it down and get it back. Just like my heart. It's yours, Renee, forever. And now, to sweet Jessie. I learned to ride on a mustang named rumble. Damned if that horse didn't do me in first time out. But I showed him who's boss and -- and we became good pals. When he passed on, I had one of his shoes cast and hung over the stable door. It was my good-luck charm -- till you came along, Jessie. It's my gift to you. Though it can't be as much a blessing to you as, Lord knows, as you've been to me. Huh. Kevin and Joey, you're up next. Then there's my lovely Natalie. Hmm. Full of piss and vinegar, just like her Grandpa. We're two of a kind, gal. Born with nothing and given nothing. But we built ourselves up because we knew we were something. And you, my little lady, are as much a Buchanan as I ever was. So, honey, I leave you this to remind you who you are, where you came from, and where you are going. And to the lovely Sarah, I leave my record collection.
Beaver: The remainder of the collection has been shipped to Llanview, along with the record player.
Asa: This music brought me hours of comfort and lifted my spirits, but not as much as you did, kiddo. And now, on to my boys. At the same time, biggest triumph, and the worst disappointment.
Man: And after your wedding, we will add your success story to the wall of truth.
David: Ah, the wall of truth. It's right next to the hall of celebrity narcissists.
Man: Oh, your marriage will be a testament to dreamland's record of healing.
David: Oh, we are healed.
Alex: Within an inch of our lives.
David: Such wit.
Alex: Oh, thanks, honey.
Man: See you at the ceremony.
David: Now, wait a second. You're sure that you're empowered to marry people, right?
Alex: Oh, yes, this has to be legal.
Man: Don't you worry about a thing. Oh.
David: Well, shall we walk down to the reflecting pool of self-involvement?
Alex: Well, not right now. We have a little problem.
Gigi: Why isn't she back yet?
Noelle: Still getting ready, I guess.
Gigi: What if Charlie shows up and she's not here? Although, I guess that could be kind of cool, right? Being late for her first date?
Noelle: It shows she's not desperate.
Gigi: But what if it makes him think she's not interested? What if she isn't? What if she's getting cold feet?
Noelle: Why are we so interested in Viki's date?
Gigi: Because we don't have lives, Noelle. I'm going to go help her.
Noelle: Oh, no, you're not. Moe will can your butt if you ran out on me.
Gigi: Yeah, but he never really means it. Besides, I think it's time for my break.
Noelle: You just came on.
Gigi: Did Moe make you assistant manager when I wasn't looking? Just watch my section, ok?
Moe: There's silver to roll and tables to bus, Morasco.
Gigi: I -- I'll only be five minutes, I swear. This is a -- a mission of mercy.
Moe: Oh, you and your missions.
Gigi: This one's for real, Moe. Viki is getting ready for her big night out with Charlie, and she can't do it by herself. Oh, no. You can't go out like that.
Alex: Well, it's been such a whirlwind -- both of us unburdening ourselves on one another, and -- and then your convincing me to marry you and us planning the wedding and -- it's natural that we forgot about this.
David: Oh, the prenup. You're right, I completely forgot about the prenup.
Alex: Now if I only had a pen.
David: Well, look, I happen to have one right here --
David: For just such an emergency.
Alex: You are the perfect person, aren't you?
Alex: I already signed it.
David: All right. Well, let's see. I sign it --
David: Here, here --
Alex: And don't forget that last yellow tab.
David: And here. Is that it?
Alex: Done. Done. Have any second thoughts?
David: Nary a one. Though, I do feel a little awkward about taking 50% of your holdings should our marriage --
Alex: Don't say it! Our marriage will not fail.
David: Of course not.
Alex: Hmm. And even if it did, it's only fair that you should get half of my money, because I'm going to get half of your money.
David: If I had any, right?
David: But you do get 100% of me. My heart, my soul.
Alex: Oh, it's the "etc." That I just can't hardly wait for. Oh, no, no, no, not before the ceremony. I might lose control of myself.
David: Fine by me. Sucker.
Alex: See you at the altar. Sucker.
Asa: Bo and Clint -- for much of my life, you frustrated the hell out of me. Pains in the ass, both of you. You went off on your own, defied me time and time again. It wasn't till -- till you became fathers yourselves that I realized -- huh -- I was the problem. It was me. Clint, I saw how you loved and protected little Kevin and Joey, even though you didn't owe them a damn thing. You turned those boys into real fine Buchanans. And, Bo, I saw how you made amends with Drew -- the way I never learned -- and became the kind of father to Matthew I -- I didn't know how to be for you. All along, it was my job, I thought, to make men out of you. Huh. No. It was you two who made me see what a man really is. Clint, I leave you my gold spurs. They always kept me 10 lengths ahead in any race. Ah, maybe it'll do the same for you. And, Bo, 125 years ago, your great-great-grandpa Buck kept the law as sheriff of Buchanan city. I'm going to give you the badge he wore. Now you're the best damn lawman there is. And finally --
Asa: For Matthew -- my Stetson.
Matthew: Oh, man --
Asa: An old cowboy named Eugene Carey gave it to me at my first drive. It's been with me through thick and thin. Here's hoping you only have thick.
Beaver: I'm sorry, but Asa's Stetson isn't among his personal effects.
Matthew: But my dad already gave me the hat, right after he died. I guess they had the same idea.
Asa: Ok. Now, who's ready for the big ticket items?
Marty: Don't you want to make your daughter and Cole's life a little easier?
Todd: I've done my bit for them.
Marty: Oh, and that would be --
Todd: I have not prevented them from seeing each other.
Marty: Yeah, well, my son is obviously still on edge around you. Starr is not very comfortable around me. And they're so young and they have been through so much. The last thing they need to worry about is that their parents' issues are going to drive them apart.
Todd: They're not going to get my blessing, Marty. But as I said, I'm not going to prevent them from seeing each other. But that's the best you're going to get from me.
Marty: Well, gee, I guess that's a step in the right direction.
Todd: Well, according to Starr, Cole makes her happy, and that's what I want for her, so -- but I don't want to be friends with you.
Marty: Gee, darn. Yeah, I don't want to be friends with you, either. But you're a good father. Better than the one you had.
Todd: Well, you can't get much worse than him.
Marty: He made you what you are, and I can see you struggling against that.
Todd: You know, this kid we're looking for -- he's in the world because somebody did to me what I did to you. So, that's why I'm trying so hard to find him.
Ramsey: If you want to push, I have no problem bringing you back into custody.
Wendell: You two know each other?
Ramsey: Well enough. And this time won't be some Mayberry jail with the barney-style quick release.
John: I just came to pick up my car, Lee. Since when is that a federal offense?
Celia: He's threatening us.
John: Are you charging these people with something?
Celia: He said he would take away Wendell's towing license and send my brother to jail.
John: Is that how the bureau's operating these days? You know, Lee, you keep playing these games, it'll be your career going up in smoke.
Ramsey: Beats getting innocent women murdered. Okey-dokey. Let's go. Now, John, if you don't back off, I will I.D. you as an enemy combatant. Easy peasy. And there ain't no bail in Guantanamo.
Agent: Are you just going to let McBain go?
Ramsey: Uh-huh. Once we hook his car up with this.
Agent: I'm on it.
Ramsey: All right. Now, if Trotsky in there gets anything from the Freemans, he leads us straight to his sister-in-law and the child, and we take them all down.
David: Wow. You know, this is the nicest track suit a groom could ask for. Is there anything that dreamland doesn't do?
Man: We're a full-service facility.
[Plays "Wedding March"]
Man: Ahem -- dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to join this man and woman in the holiest of unions.
Wendell: It's real good of you, Mr. McBain, coming to our aid with the FBI.
John: Thank you.
Celia: We just hope you ain't making trouble for yourself.
John: Well, I used to be one of those people. I know how to handle them.
Celia: I see. Coffee, Wendell?
Wendell: You used to be one of those people?
John: I became a cop in Pennsylvania. Don't worry, I'm on leave right now.
Celia: Why should we be worried? We haven't done anything wrong.
John: Well, sometimes, what's legal and what's right doesn't always add up. Especially when it involves a woman on the run trying to protect her son.
Celia: No idea what you're talking about, Mr. McBain.
John: Look, I just saved you the grilling of a federal agent. I think the least you can do is tell me the truth. Now, I know you've been helping a woman named Marcie McBain. You -- you may know her as Penny Shaw. And now I'd like you to help me find her.
Marty: Wow, a new and improved Todd Manning. Anything else you want to surprise me with?
Todd: Well, my kids have always come first. That's never changed.
Marty: Yeah, you accepting that my son makes Starr happy -- that's not a change?
Todd: Oh, I don't care. If she says she's in love with him, that's fine. She'll get over it at some point.
Marty: And if she doesn't?
Todd: Just like you, I will do anything to keep my kids from suffering. Of course, you went to extremes, though, didn't you? Marrying Miles?
Marty: Yeah, looks like I'm right back where I started.
Todd: What do you mean?
Marty: Protecting my son from that sick, depraved son of a bitch.
Starr: Finally! What took you guys forever?
Markko: Chill, ok? I left school as soon as I got your text. And I had to cut physics, and Mr. Arenas is totally on my case, anyway --
Langston: And then he had to sneak me out of school.
Starr: Ok, well, guys, I'm really sorry, but I'm kind of freaking out right now.
Markko: Why? What happened?
Starr: Cole -- Cole never called me back last night, and he didn't show up at school today.
Markko: Well, maybe he cut school because he had to rewrite that paper after his computer crashed.
Langston: Yeah, Markko could be right. I mean, Cole's mom is with your mom and dad, isn't she? Maybe he just took the day off.
Starr: He wouldn't have done that without telling me. And I kept calling and calling and all I would get is voicemail! Jeez, where is he?
Markko: Ok, I say we hang out here and we see if he comes back.
Starr: No! Something might be wrong. We have to do something now.
Langston: Like what?
Starr: Break in.
Jared: Midnight logic? Did you know he had this?
Sarah: Yeah. Ahem. But he likes country western mostly, and some rock-and-roll.
Asa: Next on my list is the ranch. After my oil fields, this -- this is the first piece of land I ever bought. I built it from nothing. Added on to it as I added on to my holdings. So I leave this place to one person who -- who can most appreciate it, a person who respects it the way I did, the way it deserves to be. I leave the ranch to a trusted and treasured member of this family. Chuck Wilson III.
Alex: I promise to love, and consult, and to have you again and again and again.
David: I promise to share all my life and resources, just like you'll share yours.
Alex: In sickness, but mostly in health.
David: For richer, and for richer.
Alex: As long as we both shall live.
David: A good long, long, long, long time, God willing.
Man: Is there anyone here today that knows of any reason that these two should not be joined in wedlock?
Alex's voice: Asa.
David's voice: Dorian.
Alex's voice: Nigel.
David's voice: Dorian.
Alex's voice: Carlo.
David's voice: Dorian.
Man: Well, then, I give you Mr. and Mrs. David Vickers.
Alex: Should be Mrs. David Buchanan.
David: Did you say something, darling?
Alex: Oh, no. I was just puckering up.
Man: You may kiss the bride.
[Guitarist plays "wedding march"]
Wendell: Well, I wish we could help you.
Celia: But the simple fact is we have not seen this girl.
John: I know your brother Clarence sent a woman and a child here. You may know her by the name of Penny Shaw. But her real name is Marcie McBain and she's my sister-in-law. She's been married to my brother for over a year and a half. She's traveling with a little boy. She calls him Aaron, but his real name is Tommy. He's my nephew and he's named after my father. What I'm trying to do is find Marcie before the government does, because all they see is a woman who kidnapped a child, but that's not what she is. If Lee Ramsey finds her first, she's going to go to jail or worse. Please don't let that happen. Tell me what you know.
Todd: You saying that Miles is trying to get back at you?
Marty: I don't know for sure, ok? I probably shouldn't have even said anything.
Todd: You want me to take him out for you?
Marty: No, but thanks for the offer.
Todd: Well, I don't know. The justice system just gave him a slap on the wrist. If he did something to you or threatened you, I think we ought to take him out. Because if he's going to come after you, he's going to come after my family.
Viki: Hey, come on! It's enough, please!
Gigi: Close your mouth and don't talk!
Viki: Come on -- this is just a simple date!
Noelle: It's not "just" anything. Charlie is hot.
Gigi: He could be the one!
Viki: Honey, I've had the one, a few times over, ok?
Gigi: Well, maybe this "one" is the last. Ever think about that?
Viki: What I'm thinking is I probably look like a clown with all this makeup you're putting on me.
Noelle: You look gorgeous.
Viki: Don't do that!
Gigi: Well, you got to show off what God gave you, Vik.
Viki: Oh, come on. I'm not looking for a one-night stand.
Gigi: It's one button. One button is all about mystery. It says, "hot stuff coming through, but don't get any ideas because I'm a class act." Now, two buttons -- that would be different. That would say, "I'm cheap, I'm easy, let's mosey on back to your big rig."
Viki: There are other ways to say "sexy," you know? Besides, even one button might not be appropriate for where we're going.
Noelle: You kidding? No place around Paris is fancy enough for "no buttons."
Viki: Oh. I wish you two wouldn't get so caught up in this. Honest, it's a simple date. I barely know Charlie, you know?
Gigi: Did someone forget to tell Charlie this is a simple date?
Jessica: Did you have any idea?
Chuck: None. I swear, I -- I'm as surprised as you all are.
Beaver: Ahem. If I may?
Clint: Yes, please. Play the rest of it.
[Beaver plays DVD]
Asa: Oh, I didn't mean literally, of course. But Chuck's grandpa was -- was like family to me, the best, most loyal friend I ever had. And young Chuck -- every bit the man and friend that his grandfather was.
Chuck: No! This is Buchanan land. It should stay in the family.
Natalie: Well, you heard grandpa, and obviously this is what he wants.
Clint: Well, Natalie's right. We're here to honor Asa's wishes and it would be a disservice to his memory to deny him what he wanted. Chuck, this was Asa Buchanan's ranch, and he wanted you to have it.
Chuck: Well, I hope you all know that you will always be welcome here.
Asa: Now, the ranch is -- is where I got my start, but I made my home in Llanview. And my house was bigger than every other house there. Huh -- and that's what I liked about it. And I'm leaving it to a very important woman in my life -- smart, doesn't take any bull off anybody, a real feisty redhead. Nora Hanen, mother of my grandson, I'd be mighty pleased for you and Matthew to make that place your own.
David: So, my sweet, was our wedding everything you hoped it would be?
Alex: Oh, all that and more.
Alex: But when the music's over and the dancing stops --
David: Hey, why so wistful? We haven't even cut the cake yet.
Alex: I was just thinking about our future -- what's down the road for us.
David: Well, that's the beauty of unlimited wealth. We can go wherever the wind blows us, so long as it's five-star rated.
Alex: You do make me laugh.
David: Ah, it's all up to you, baby.
Alex: Oh -- it is, isn't it?
Alex: There's only one place in the whole world that I would like to be right now.
David: Fiji, New Zealand, Tahiti?
Alex: Llanview, P-A.
Matthew: Oh, my God!
Matthew: Mom, this means we never have to move!
Nora: Asa, you old devil, I can't believe you did this.
Beaver: You heard him, Ms. Hanen. That's the way Mr. Buchanan wanted it.
Natalie: Pack your bags, Banks.
Nora: Renee, this -- this isn't right, I -- I don't know what to say.
Renee: Let Asa do the talking, sweetheart.
Beaver: May I?
Asa: It really gives me peace of mind to know that Nora and Matthew will continue to liven that place up for my lovely Renee who, by the way, isn't going anywhere. She's going to stay there, too, as will Nigel. I'm providing a permanent salary for you, Nigel. I hope you all enjoy my home.
Nora: I -- I -- I -- I'm sorry, this -- this just -- this isn't right. I mean, this house, it -- it belongs to Clint. It belongs to you, Renee.
Renee: No, no, no, you're not hearing what Asa's saying. He didn't want me to be alone, and in the end, he provided for all of us. It was Asa's way of doing a little social engineering.
Nora: But it's not right. I mean, to have his two biggest assets in his portfolio go to -- out of the family to friends.
Clint: Nora, we're going to have to go along with Asa on this one, all right? He's always been full of surprises, and knowing him, there's more to come.
Marty: Look, it wasn't anything that big.
Todd: What happened?
Marty: It was Halloween night and this person in this death costume just -- I don't know, it was kind of creepy. I think he was intentionally trying to scare me.
Todd: And you think it was Miles?
Marty: I don't know. Just -- whoever was behind the mask, I got the feeling that they knew me.
Todd: And did you talk to Miles about it?
Marty: Yeah, I did, and he denied it.
Todd: Surprise, surprise.
Marty: Look, I -- I don't even know why I said anything to you. I shouldn't have opened my mouth. I should've just left it alone.
Todd: Ok, no problem. Are we done?
Marty: Yes, you can go now.
Todd: I'm just waiting for Blair to get back.
Todd: Are you going to be ok here by yourself?
Marty: I think I'll be fine, but thanks.
Markko: Hey, where'd you learn to do that?
Langston: Watching TV.
Langston: No. Actually, I --
Starr: Guys, look! I found Cole's phone. This is the reason why he came here last night -- he was looking for it.
Markko: Check the call history.
Starr: Right, ok. "Missed," "missed" -- all of them are from me. Why -- if he did go anyplace, why would he leave without his phone? I'm going to go check again.
Langston: Well, if he forgot it last night, maybe he forgot --
Starr: Guys, look what I found!
Charlie: So, I -- I see the gang's all here.
Viki: Yeah, my entourage.
Charlie: Oh, for you.
Viki: That's so nice, thank you. They're really lovely, thank you.
Gigi: You look real nice, Charlie.
Noelle: Sure do.
Moe: Those are mighty nice boots you got there. Wouldn't mind a pair myself.
Charlie: Well, just write down your size and I'll get you a pair.
Moe: Well, that's mighty kind of you.
Moe: I'm a size 10.
Charlie: Ok. You ready to go?
Viki: Yeah. Oh, these will die if I take them -- hang on. Gigi, would you mind putting these in water for me?
Gigi: Sure thing. Hot stuff!
Charlie: Shall we?
Viki: Thank you.
Asa: Just one more thing. Before we get to the business of my finances, a special bequest to my son -- the one I didn't know I had until -- until it was too late.
David: Uh -- now, I like Llanview as much as the next guy, you know? Uh -- friendly people, nice restaurants, a couple of good shoe stores, but I was thinking more along the lines of Mykonos or Ibiza. What do you say we go pick out a winter home in Cape Town?
Alex: Ha -- we can do all that. But Llanview's on the way to those places. I just want to stop by just for a little bit.
David: "On the way"? Did they move the state of Pennsylvania, and how long were you thinking about stopping over, anyway?
Alex: Oh, really -- I just have a little bit of unfinished business. Hey, you know what? I think you'll be able to help me with this business -- hubby.
Starr: Guys, this is it. This is the mask from Halloween.
Markko: No, Starr, no one was out there.
Langston: Just the power guy.
Starr: No, I was right, ok? There was someone out there all along and he was wearing this mask! And now it's in his apartment and Cole is gone!
Langston: Do -- do you think someone grabbed him?
Starr: I'm calling the police. Oh, my God!
Markko: Wait, wait -- no, no, no, no, no! We broke into this apartment, remember? So before we invite the cops over, I say we -- we make sure we've covered all our bases.
Starr: What are you talking about? What bases? What else is there to do?
Markko: Well, have you tried calling Cole's mom yet?
Starr: No. No, I didn't -- you're right, you're right. I should've thought of that.
Langston: Well, do it now. Use Cole's phone. Her number will probably be in there, and with any luck, Dr. Saybrooke will know exactly what's going on.
Wendell: Well, if we d know something and we told you, at guarantee would we have that that girl would come out of this ok?
John: I promised my brother that I'd bring that boy home and protect his wife, and that's what I'm going to do -- if you help me.
Wendell: If you're such a good friend to Penny -- Marcie -- how come when she saw you last night, she ran and hid?
John: I think she was running from the guy that I was with or maybe she's just afraid of anyone who knows who she is. But understand this -- I am not her enemy.
Celia: She might just be on her way to Paris, Texas. That's all we know.
John: Thank you, that's all I need.
Gigi: The look on Charlie's face -- did you see it when she unbuttoned her button?
Noelle: He was blushing, I swear.
Gigi: Viki, too, when he moved all close to her and gave her the once-over.
Moe: You girls going to stand there gossiping all day? Get out there and wait on them customers!
Gigi: Yes, Moe. Hey there. Any seat you want, hon.
Marcie: Ok. What do you think, huh? Yeah. Feels pretty safe to me, too.
On the next "One Life to Live" --
Clint: I want you to tell me the name of my long-lost brother.
John: If Marty's missing and Cole's missing, it's not a coincidence, Bo.
Blair: We need to step up the search.
Gigi: Are you on the run from someone?
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