OLTL Transcript Monday 10/16/06

One Life to Live Transcript Monday 10/16/06


Provided By Boo
Proofread by Brandi

Antonio: Look, are you sure you want to arrest Nash?

Cristian: Yeah, I want him arrested. He's drunk. He went after me for no reason.

Nash: I had plenty of reason.

Antonio: Cool it or I will arrest you.

Cristian: You're nuts, you know that, Brennan? You belong in jail.

Antonio: You --

Evangeline: I came here to make up with you, Cristian, not watch you get into another fight.

Todd: Hey, hey, hey. Hold on a second. I am very happy that the kids are moving back in --

Blair: Good.

Todd: But no way you're moving in with them.

Blair: Oh, well, you don't have a choice, Todd.

Todd: Ok. Take her stuff out of here.

Blair: Don't even think about it.

Cole: Thanks, dude. I'll see you at practice.

Boy: All right, later.

Cole: Hey.

Starr: Hey. I'm glad you're here. I didn't see you at school today.

Cole: Yeah, I didn't see you, either, and I was hoping I'd run into you.

Dorian: You really believe that Spencer is Asa Buchanan's son?

David: Well, it explains Spencer's hatred for the Buchanans and why he's always been such an egomaniacal, power-hungry dirtbag.

Dorian: Yup.

David: Asa had an affair with my mother and gave birth to Spencer.

Dorian: And then she went trudging through the snow, clutching her infant babe in her arms, begging Asa to take them in, and he turned them away.

David: I think Asa would've turned them away even if it was hot as hell and she was sweating bullets, which she probably was, what with a baby and no husband to help support her.

Dorian: But a very rich baby daddy.

David: Yeah, that's exactly my point. Asa has more money than Fort Knox. Spencer wants his share.

Dorian: If he's Asa's son.

David: Ah, I don't think he'd make that up -- it's too easy to disprove. I always knew Spencer was a bastard. Never knew he was literally a bastard.

Dorian: Yes, but if he is Asa's son, he's entitled to some of the Buchanan money. But, David darling, what's in it for you?

David: My share of the family fortune.

Dorian: They're not your family!

David: I'm Spencer's only living relative. What he gets, I get. How do you think I'll look in a cowboy hat?

Dorian: Whoa, Pardner. What makes you think the Buchanans are going to let you get one dime of their money? Hmm.

Viki: Ooh, Clint.

Clint: Oh, hi.

Viki: I'm so sorry. Um -- I actually came to see Asa. I heard that he was released from the hospital.

Clint: Uh -- yeah, but he's not here right now.

Viki: Oh.

Clint: In fact, um, Asa, Nigel, and the car have disappeared.

Viki: Oh, dear. You think --

Clint: That he bribed Nigel to take him into town to restock the bar? Yes, that's exactly what I think.

Viki: That's not very wise.

Clint: No, it's complete lunacy, but, you know, trying to stop pa only makes him angry, and the last thing he needs in his life is any more stress.

Spencer: You're looking well, Asa. So tell me -- to what do I owe the pleasure?

Asa: Your weasel of a brother told me you planted that picture of Emma in my lodge. Why? What the hell did you think you were going to gain?

Viki: Well, on the upside, Asa must be feeling a lot better if he convinced Nigel to get him out of the house, right?

Clint: Yeah, well, I'm sure you're right. I'm just hoping that he doesn't suffer a relapse.

Viki: Well, at least he's getting out.

Clint: Natalie still refuses to leave her room?

Viki: Oh, Clint. She won't talk to anybody, she won't talk on the phone -- nothing.

Clint: Well, listen, why don't -- why don't I stop by and I suggest that we, you know, take a little drive?

Viki: You can try. If I were you, I'd give it a few days. To quote Clint Buchanan, "she needs to find her own way through this."

Clint: All right. But you will call me if you feel that she needs me?

Viki: Absolutely.

Clint: Right.

Viki: Thank you very much. You tell Asa I stopped by?

Clint: Yeah.

Viki: Good.

Clint: You know, you're welcome to stay here and wait till he gets back.

Viki: Uh, actually, thank you, but I'm meeting Jessie. We're planning the wedding.

Clint: Oh. Well, enjoy, and tell her I've been practicing for our father/daughter dance.

Viki: That's good. You need the practice. Clint?

Clint: Hmm?

Viki: Um -- have you -- have you talked to Dorian at all recently?

Clint: Uh -- no. No, I haven't talked to Dorian in quite a while. Why?

Viki: I -- I had to stop by her house earlier to drop Duke's medical records off for Kelly, and David is there.

Clint: What was David doing there?

Viki: Making himself quite at home, actually.

Clint: Really? What does that mean?

Viki: He -- he's walking around the house in his underwear.

David: My money is on Spencer to get the Buchanan's money, especially since he's Asa's biological son.

Dorian: Even if he does wrangle some of the Buchanan money, what makes you think he's going to share any of it with you?

David: He loves me?

Dorian: Ha.

David: You're right, maybe I need a plan. More importantly, maybe I need someone to help me come up with that plan.

Dorian: I get a cut of your cut.

David: You don't need the money.

Dorian: Good luck.

David: Wait, maybe -- ugh. I'm sure we could come up with something.

Dorian: 50%.

David: Are you insane?

Dorian: Ha! Ha-ha-ha-ha.

David: Five.

Dorian: 40.

David: 10.

Dorian: 20.

David: Deal.

Dorian: I want it in writing.

David: You drive a hard bargain.

Dorian: I'm in good company. Now, what are you doing? What?

David: I'm going to make a diagram of all the twisted branches of the Buchanan family tree. Maybe there's some sort of rotten twig we can use to our advantage.

Dorian: They're not all rotten, especially not Clint.

David: Who do we have? There's Asa, Bo, boyfriend Clint --

Dorian: Hmm.

David: And his nut-case children. Do I have to list all of their individual personalities?

Dorian: It's a very good idea adding Jessica and Kevin. Even though they're not biologically linked to the Buchanan family -- ha-ha -- they get their crazies from Viki's gene pool.

David: Really enjoying this, aren't you?

Dorian: Oh.

David: The money mean that much to you?

Dorian: Oh, actually, the money doesn't matter to me at all.

David: Oh, money's never mattered to you.

Dorian: David, I want you out of here. And the sooner, the better.

David: I've started leaving the seat down.

Dorian: Look, my dear, your living here is -- is -- well, it's not a very good idea because it might give people the impression that we're lovers.

David: People like Clint?

Dorian: Well, his heart is going to be broken. He'll be devastated when he finds out that Spencer is his half brother.

David: And you will be there to comfort him. Now I'm starting to understand why you're so eager to help me.

Dorian: Well, maybe it isn't such a good idea after all.

David: Wait a second. Would you change your mind if I told you that I really do need you?

Dorian: All right. I'm going to give you some advice as to how you can get your hands on the Buchanan money. After that, you're on your own.

Nigel: Sir, may I suggest we leave before you further upset yourself?

Asa: I'm not upset. I'm angry. Now, is his brother yanking my chain or is Emma Bradley really his mother?

Spencer: She was.

Asa: Then why did you break in my lodge and leave her photo?

Spencer: Never said that I did. But if I had, it would be to remind you of the woman that you claimed to love and then just walked away from.

Asa: Who in the hell are you to judge me?

Spencer: You broke her heart, Asa. And I hope to God that photograph reminds you of just what a cold-hearted, cruel, selfish bastard you really are.

Starr: I wanted to give your sweats back.

Cole: I want to get my sweats back.

Starr: That was -- um -- well, thank you for loaning them to me. They're washed.

Cole: Oh, you didn't have to do that.

Starr: Here you go. Trust me, I didn't. My aunt's maid did. It's a long story. Let's not go there.

Cole: Ah, no problem.

Starr: Hmm.

Cole: So you didn't get in trouble when you got home?

Starr: No, I just hid the clothes that Britney spilled beer on, wore your sweats. No one noticed a thing. They never do unless you're missing a limb or dating someone that they don't approve of.

Cole: Good.

Starr: Yeah. So --

Cole: So, listen, I'd love to stay and talk, but I've got practice, sorry.

Starr: Yeah, and I got to go meet up with my brother at school, so -- um, well, thank you again and thanks for helping me out.

Cole: No sweat.

Starr: Bye.

Jessica: Well, he's cute.

Starr: He's just a guy from my school.

Jessica: Well, do you like him?

Brian: Sorry, man, she's paying me.

Todd: I want you to get her stuff out of here.

Blair: Do not do that. Here is what I owe you, Brian. Thank you so much. I'll take that. Goodbye.

Todd: Brian, I will pay you $1,000 --

Blair: If you take one dime of his money --

Todd: To take these items back where you found them.

Blair: I will call your boss and tell him that you didn't do the job that I paid you to do, and then he will fire you. How's that?

Brian: Listen, I'm no marriage counselor, but you guys need some serious help.

Blair: Oh, here, no, this is yours!

Todd: You are good, Blair. You're very good.

Blair: Yes, I am. What -- what are you talking about?

Todd: Threatening that guy like you did there. Where did you learn that from -- me or from Truman?

Blair: Oh, Todd, come on. Don't flatter yourself, or him.

Todd: What is it you think you're doing here?

Blair: Oh, what does it look like I'm doing?

Todd: Isn't it time to pick the kids up from school?

Blair: Got a driver to do that. I just love this coat. I want it to be -- everything unpacked before the kids get home. What are you doing? Hey! Hey, Todd!

Evangeline: I don't believe you.

Cristian: Wait a minute -- I did not start this fight.

Nash: Arrest this guy --

Antonio: Shut up.

Cristian: Look, I know what you're thinking, but you're wrong.

Evangeline: Was I wrong when I walked out to the alley last night and saw you beating up that kid?

Cristian: I was just trying to defend myself with this guy.

Evangeline: I saw you hitting him, Cristian.

Cristian: Yeah, once, defending myself!

Nash: I'm going to sue you. You're going to be begging --

Antonio: Nash?

Claudia: Nash --

Cristian: Yeah, well, good luck, I'm broke!

Claudia: Hi. I saw the whole thing and he's right. He was just trying to block Nash's punches.

Billy: The other guy started it. If you want, I'll call the cops.

Antonio: I am a cop. Look, was there any damage done to the bar, anyone hurt?

Nash: I was hurt. I think I -- I'm going to --

Billy: No.

Antonio: Good. Then there's no reason to make this official.

Cristian: Whoa, whoa, wait a minute. You're just going to let him go?

Antonio: Yeah, yeah, because I know he's got a pretty good reason for acting the way he's acting.

David: That's brilliant.

Dorian: Hmm.

David: You're brilliant.

Dorian: I know.

David: You might be the most devious woman I've ever met.

Dorian: I take that as a compliment.

David: I'm getting excited, I better go. Wish me luck.

Dorian: Always do. David?

David: Hmm?

Dorian: You make those cowboys pay.

David: Oh, I will, thanks to you. You are a genius, Dorian.

Dorian: Hmm.

Clint: David and Dorian are back together?

Viki: I -- I don't -- I don't know if they are. I mean, according to David, they're not.

Clint: Well, then, what -- he just stopped by her house to get his clothes laundered?

Viki: He says he's living there.

Clint: Oh, of course, yes. Yes, yes -- free room and board. Why am I surprised?

Viki: I'm sorry. I -- I thought you should know. I'm -- I'm sorry. I -- I can see it upsets you, bothers you.

Clint: No, it -- not -- not in the least. Dorian and I are through and she can do whatever she likes with whomever she likes.

Viki: Actually, I -- I mean, I don't really think they are together, you know.

Clint: Well, who cares? I mean, if they are, then -- then they deserve each other.

Viki: You know what? I don't think anyone deserves Dorian, not even David. Anyway, I'll be off.

Clint: Yeah. Well, listen, you give Jessica my love, all right?

Viki: I will. I will. Clint? I really hope you are over Dorian.

Asa: So, that's what Emma told you? That I broke her heart?

Nigel: Sir, you're getting agitated.

Asa: Because you keep interrupting. Answer me.

Spencer: My mother told me a lot of things about you.

Asa: What else did she tell you? Did she tell you how much I loved her? And that I would never hurt her for anything?

Spencer: Actually, it was quite the opposite.

Asa: She's lying.

Spencer: Can't rewrite history, Asa.

Asa: I don't have to. I loved that woman. When it was over, we both moved on.

Spencer: Not according to her.

Asa: Well, she's the one rewriting, then.

Spencer: You know nothing about her! She died an angry, bitter woman because of you!

Asa: Don't blame me because she had a psychopath for a son.

Nigel: I'm sorry, sir, but this is not productive. We really must go.

Asa: Fine, fine. I'm finished here. And if there's any justice in this world, you will never be free Truman. Dream on, Truman. But if you do happen to manage to get out of here and come after me or my family, so help me God I will kill you.

Starr: You mean do I "like him" like him?

Jessica: I'm sorry. I shouldn't have asked.

Starr: No, I don't really know him. I mean, he did something nice for me the other day, so I guess he's ok.

Jessica: Well, if he did something nice for you, then he's ok in my book.

Starr: Well, I would really rather talk about this cutie pie. You are so cute, yes, you are!

Jessica: Yeah, she's beautiful --

Starr: Yeah.

Jessica: I mean, objectively speaking.

Starr: I think she looks like Natalie.

Jessica: Natalie?

Starr: Yeah.

Jessica: Yeah. You know what? I guess she does, a little, without the red hair and hopefully without the temper.

Starr: How is Natalie? I mean, I guess that's a dumb question.

Jessica: It's not a dumb question. You know, she's hanging in there. It's hard for her, though.

Starr: It must be. John was such a nice guy, and I remember with my dad, it was like the worst thing in the world. I'm just so happy that I got him back.

Jessica: Well, she's going to get through this eventually. I actually invited her out with us today, it's such a nice day.

Starr: She probably wants to be alone right now. I know I did. You should really ask her again.

Jessica: Thanks. I will.

Starr: Yeah.

Viki: Hello.

Starr and Jessica: Hi.

Viki: Hi, sweetheart. Starr. Ooh, look -- my granddaughter! Hi, darling. Oh, my goodness -- hi! Hey, how's school? Things any better?

Starr: Today wasn't a disaster.

Viki: Excellent.

Starr: I got to go, though, you guys.

Viki: Ok.

Starr: It was nice seeing you.

Viki: You, too, sweetheart.

Jessica: Bye.

Viki: Starr? Awesome outfit!

Starr: Thank you.

Jessica: What's going on with Starr at school?

Viki: Oh, it's the usual. Hi, darling. You know how mean children can be to each other in high school.

Jessica: Yeah, I know.

Viki: Hey, let's talk about something fun like a wedding, hmm?

Jessica: Yeah, if there's going to be one.

Viki: What does that mean?

Jessica: It means that I just feel bad about planning a wedding so soon after John's death.

Viki: Darling, life has to go on, you know? And frankly, I think this family needs the joy of a wedding right now and you deserve to be happy.

Jessica: Yeah, so does Natalie.

Viki: Yes, she does, but, sweetheart, postponing your wedding for her is not going to make her feel better. It's going to upset her. Darling, she wants you to live your life, we all do. Believe me, the best thing you can do right now is marry Antonio. Hey, it's been a long time coming.

Jessica: You know what? You're right.

Viki: Mm-hmm.

Jessica: Thank you.

Viki: Of course I am.

Dorian: Coming.

Clint: Your security guys said it was ok for me to come up to the house.

Dorian: You are always on my welcome list. Please come in. I'm in the midst of making soupe divers avec legume et lentille.

Clint: Ok. I heard something disturbing, and I wanted to see if it was true.

Dorian: No, not about Adriana.

Clint: No, no, no, no. It's about you -- you and Da -- What the hell is this?

Todd: I'm tired of telling you I don't want you anymore.

Blair: Well, it doesn't matter what you think, Todd, because I'm not going anywhere. I'm staying.

Todd: Since when do you have a say in it?

Blair: Well, since we made love right here.

Todd: We had sex, Blair. And it was a mistake.

Blair: That's because you let your guard down just long enough to show me how you really felt.

Todd: I wouldn't make too much out of it if I were you.

Blair: Oh, oh, oh! Stop being so childish!

Todd: Don't be stubborn.

Blair: Stubborn is what I do best.

Todd: No, childish is what I do best.

Blair: No -- you're being beyond childish, Todd. Oh, that is just so grownup. That's just idiotic.

Todd: Well, idiotic is what I do best. I'm feeling particularly idiotic. You must bring it out in me.

Blair: Go ahead. Throw every bit of it out. I'm not going out there to get it.

Todd: Are you -- are you afraid that I'm going to slam the door and lock it after you?

Blair: Well, that's exactly what you'll do.

Todd: All right. I hope that Starr doesn't have anything breakable in here.

Blair: Go ahead. You're the one tossing.

Todd: You're the one she'll blame.

Blair: I told you I had a key.

Todd: Where?

Blair: Like I would really ever tell you where it is.

Todd: Give me that key.

Blair: Nope. Never gonna get it [Blair hums] Hey! Todd? I have a key.

Todd: Not to the new lock.

Blair: Wait a minute -- that's not funny.

Todd: Well, I'm not laughing.

Blair: Come on. Damn it, just open the door and let me in!

Dorian: That is none of your business.

Clint: Oh, now, wait a minute. My family's names are on that list, so that makes it my business. Ahem.

Dorian: I have a friend who's looking for a job, and I was just making a list of recommendations of who he should talk to.

Clint: Uh-huh. Asa -- Bo -- me -- Kevin?

Dorian: Well, you're all part of Buchanan enterprises, one of the largest corporations in Llanview. Why not start at the top?

Clint: But Matthew?

Dorian: My friend may be reduced to taking a paper route.

Clint: Your friend wouldn't happen to be David Vickers, would it?

Dorian: Oh! David looking for a job? Oh, how silly does that sound?

Clint: Oh, not as silly as you taking David back into your home. Or your bed. And that seems to be what you've done.

David: If that's a biography on Houdini, it's not going to do you any good. He never escaped -- from prison.

Spencer: My quota of harassment has already been exceeded for the day, David.

David: Oh, I'm not here to harass you, I'm here to help you.

Spencer: Since when?

David: Ok, I'm here to help us -- emphasis on me.

Spencer: What now, David?

David: You're about to be tried for murder. We need to discuss our financial future.

Spencer: Nothing to talk about. I'm rich, you're not, and it's never going to change.

David: Actually, it is. As soon as you sign these documents.

Blair: Come on, Todd, open the door! Look, you win, ok? I'll -- I'll just come in, I'll get the rest of my stuff, and then I'll go, ok?

Todd: Yeah, right.

Blair: Todd, sweetheart? Jack and Starr are here, and I told them that I accidentally locked myself out. So would you be a real sweetheart and -- and open the door for us?

Todd: That's very clever, Blair, but that's not going to work.

Starr: Dad, quit fooling around. Let us in! Dad, are we really moving back in?

Blair: Well, that's up to your dad.

Todd: You kids are moving back in, but your mom is going back to Dorian's.

Jack: I'm not staying without Mom!

Todd: Hmm.

Evangeline: You're Nash's friend. You're defending Cristian. Why?

Claudia: Because Nash was out of line. I mean, he's lucky that he didn't start a fight with someone who seriously wanted to hurt him.

Evangeline: When I walked into the bar, I saw Cristian hitting Nash, so I --

Claudia: He needed to defend himself. And he didn't even want to do that. I could tell. No, he showed a lot of self-control.

Evangeline: So Cristian didn't start the fight?

Claudia: Nash was ranting about Tess, as usual, saying he didn't want to lose the baby and the vineyard. And he said he was going to go talk to Jessica, when he was clearly too drunk to do that. And Cristian tried to stop him, but Nash hit him. Idiot.

Evangeline: So basically, I overreacted.

Claudia: Antonio really should take Nash to jail.

Cristian: Why are you taking his side? You weren't here. You don't know what happened.

Antonio: Well, I have a pretty good idea.

Cristian: So you're not going to arrest him?

Antonio: No.

Cristian: I can't believe you've gone soft on this guy, especially after he tried to steal Jessica from you.

Antonio: Cristian, he didn't try to steal Jessica.

Nash: Tess! I love Tess. Not Jessica. I love Tess, and Tess loves me. We made a baby, a beautiful baby, and you won't let me be with her!

Antonio: All right, black, strong. You're not going anywhere, or do I have to arrest you?

Nash: Leave me alone.

Antonio: I went to see him with Bree, and he was -- he was too drunk to be with her.

Cristian: So you took her away from him?

Antonio: It wasn't safe.

Cristian: I don't think any of you are safe around this guy. Get him out of your lives, huh? Especially Jessica's.

Antonio: Cristian, I -- I know what you're saying, ok? But that's the last thing I want to do.

Viki: Darling, you deserve to be happy. Which is why your dad and I want to give you a spectacular wedding.

Jessica: Thank you. Thank you, but I don't even know where to begin.

Viki: Ah. You begin at the beginning. Invitations and a guest list.

Jessica: And the dress. Oh, my goodness, we have to start looking.

Viki: Yeah.

Jessica: I'm so excited. And I want it to be perfect.

Viki: It will be.

Jessica: And now we have to start thinking about the florist, the vows. Do Antonio and I write our own or not?

Viki: That's up to you, honey. That's up to you.

Jessica: It is, isn't it?

Viki: Yeah.

Jessica: What's wrong?

Viki: Ahem. Well, there's nothing wrong. It's just that I've been wondering -- you know, about Nash, and what it's going to mean to have him living here in Llanview.

Claudia: I'm really worried about Nash. He's become so self-destructive.

Evangeline: You're in love with him, aren't you?

Claudia: Oh. It doesn't matter. He'll always be in love with Tess.

Evangeline: But I thought Tess no longer existed.

Claudia: Yeah, she doesn't. But I don't think he's 100% convinced of that.

Evangeline: So do you think he's going to try to bring her back out? I mean, is that even possible?

Claudia: Probably not, but when has that ever stopped someone who's in love?

Cristian: Why do you want to help this guy? I mean, he sure as hell doesn't give a damn about you.

Antonio: Because -- look, like it or not, he's Bree's father. And there's no way I'm going to keep this man from his daughter.

Cristian: No one is saying that you should turn into R.J. but this guy does not deserve the help that you're giving him.

Antonio: No, everybody deserves a second chance.

Cristian: Is that fair to Jessica?

Antonio: Jessica has shown him a lot more compassion than I have. She'll be ok.

Cristian: What about you?

Antonio: I'll be fine. Ok? Besides, I'm starting to feel sorry for the guy. I mean, look, he -- he's lost everything, all right? And he's not getting it back, and I think he's starting to realize it.

Cristian: Huh. Yeah, maybe.

Antonio: You know?

Cristian: But he better get his act together. Next guy he goes after is not going to pull his punches. And you're not going to be there to bail him out.

Billy: Guys? Coffee doesn't seem to be doing it.

Antonio: I don't think that's a good idea.

Nash: He's right. Scotch. Vodka. Tess loved vodka.

Antonio: Yeah, I'm sure she did. But you know what?

Nash: Bring me a vodka.

Antonio: The bar's closing.

Nash: I -- I want to stay here.

Antonio: No. No, it's -- it's closing for you. Let's go.

Nash: I don't want to go, I want to stay here.

Cristian: You need any help?

Antonio: No.

Claudia: If you're going to take him to jail, then will you let me know when the arraignment is?

Antonio: I'm not going to arrest him. I'm -- I'm just going to get him out of here and sober him up.

Nash: I don't want to get sober, I want to stay here.

Antonio: Yeah, I know, I know, come on.

Cristian: Sure you don't need help, man?

Antonio: Yeah -- no, I'll be fine. He's good. All right? All right? Say goodbye to the nice people.

Nash: Bye, nice people.

Dorian: How do you know about David and me?

Clint: Viki told me.

Dorian: Oh, of course. Viki.

Clint: So how soon was it after you and I broke up that you went running after David?

Dorian: Do you have so little faith in me?

Clint: Well, I know that you need a man in your life. Doesn't seem to matter who it is.

Dorian: Since when?

Clint: Dorian, he's using you. You got to know that.

Dorian: What is going on between David and me is strictly between us. And really, I'm surprised you even care.

Spencer: What are those?

David: Just a little something giving me power of attorney. And I think your will is in there somewhere.

Spencer: Really? Let me guess -- in this will, I leave everything to you, right?

David: You're not just a surgeon, you're a mind reader!

Spencer: Why in God's name would I sign these, David? Hmm?

David: Oh, because you're about to die.

Spencer: You know, that's what I've always loved about you -- always the optimist.

David: No, an optimist would say that you're going to get life in prison.

Spencer: But I'm innocent, David.

David: You're innocent? Spencer, you faked Margaret Cochran's murder, and you framed Todd. And let's not forget that you killed Thomas Mc Bain and framed me for that one.

Spencer: And that's why I should give you my money? Out of guilt?

David: You owe me.

Spencer: All right.

David: Consider it reparations.

Spencer: Maybe I will sign these documents.

David: You will? What's the catch?

Spencer: Just tell me what's really behind all this.

David: Why do you always think I've got an ulterior motive?

Spencer: You always do, Dave.

David: Not in this case.

Spencer: You're a terrible liar, you know that? I mean, look it -- I get the will part. I really do. But power of attorney? I mean, come on. That would turn over every single financial and legal aspect of my life.

David: You're about to spend a lot of time in prison. You need someone to look after your finances.

Spencer: And why you? I already have an attorney that I trust.

David: Don't you trust me?

Spencer: Do I really need to answer that, David?

David: No. But if you sign those documents, I'll tell you the truth.

Spencer: Forget it. You're out of here. Guard? Get him out.

David: Ok, wait a second. I'll tell you the truth. Just give us two minutes, please. Come here. Closer. Closer. I know you're Asa Buchanan's son.

Clint: Are you implying that I'm jealous?

Dorian: I'm not implying anything.

Clint: Because I'm not!

Dorian: No, of course not.

Clint: I just wanted to find out if it was true about David and you.

Dorian: It is.

Clint: What is? That you're -- you're back together?

Dorian: He's my houseguest.

Clint: For how long?

Dorian: Until I get tired of him.

Clint: Well, you -- you know, I never thought that I would see the day that you would be so desperate as to go running back to David.

Dorian: Thank you for caring.

Clint: Well, I got news for you, lady. I don't -- care. I don't.

Jessica: I haven't figured out how Nash is going to fit into our lives yet.

Viki: Ok, but I think it's something you need to do.

Jessica: He doesn't affect Antonio and me. We're going to survive him.

Viki: I'm sure you will. The question is, can Nash survive you and Antonio?

Jessica: He's not dealing with losing Tess very well. I mean, he misses her, and he keeps on coming around.

Viki: Is that a strain on you?

Jessica: No. No, I know Tess isn't coming back, I can feel it. But the funny thing is, I think Nash can feel it, too.

Viki: And yet he's still here.

Jessica: Well, Bree's his daughter. You can't blame him for that.

Viki: No, darling, of course not. Sweetheart, my only concern is I don't want Nash's problems to affect your wedding.

Jessica: Yeah, I know. It's hard, and that's why I don't want to think about him right now.

Viki: Ok, but as I said before, I --

Jessica: I know, I know. I heard you. I know. You know, there's one thing I do know for sure. I am going to marry Antonio, and we are going to be happy for the rest of our lives with our children.

Antonio: Come on.

Nash: What are you doing, man? Let me go.

Antonio: No, not until you sober up.

Nash: Who do you think you are, my mother, Antonio?

Antonio: No, your mother wouldn't have been as easy on you. Now, watch your step, all right?

Nash: No, no, no, no! No, no, no, no! No, no, come on. No! No, it's freezing!

Antonio: Ah, well, it's not cold enough.

Nash: Agh!

Claudia: It was nice of Antonio to give Nash a break.

Evangeline: Yeah. He's a good guy.

Claudia: Another good one. You're lucky.

Evangeline: Hmm.

Cristian: Look, I'm --

Evangeline: I'm sorry.

Cristian: Ok, you talk.

Evangeline: I walked in the bar, saw you fighting. I jumped to conclusions. I'm sorry.

Cristian: It's ok. I understand. Yeah, I understand why you would.

Evangeline: I'm not finished.

Cristian: Ok.

Evangeline: I have to be honest with you, Cristian. You scared me. I mean, I hate violence, and you have that in you.

Cristian: Well, it's not like I'm going to go around smashing heads every time somebody pisses me off. It would be a full-time job, anyway. Look, I -- I know I have a lot of frustrations, anger inside me. And I'm working on it, you know? And I can't say that it's going to magically disappear overnight. But I'm so in love with you, I would never, ever hurt you.

Evangeline: Well, you stuck by me when I was at my lowest. You didn't walk out on me, and you could have, because I was difficult.

Cristian: Yeah. Yeah, you were a tough cookie. But I liked the challenge.

Evangeline: Me, too. I'm not ready to give up on us. I am in this, completely.

Cristian: I will never hurt you. I won't let you down.

Evangeline: I believe you.

Cristian: So we're good?

Evangeline: Better than good.

Cristian: Huh.

Todd: Hey, this is your house, isn't it? Don't you miss your room, and your toys, and all that stuff?

Jack: Yeah.

Todd: Ok, well, I miss you, and I miss your sister.

Jack: I'll miss Mommy. What if I have a bad dream? She won't be there to make it go away.

Todd: I'll make it go away, sweetie.

Jack: You can't. You don't know the magic words.

Todd: I'll learn them.

Starr: Good luck. They change with every nightmare.

Jack: Because only Mommy knows them!

Blair: That's right. Come on, Todd. It's not just the dreams, it's -- you know, you don't know what he wants for breakfast, you don't know what he wants for lunch.

Todd: I think I can figure that out.

Blair: What he wants with his sandwich --

Jack: I don't want you making my lunch.

Todd: Well, then Starr can do it for you.

Starr: I'm not making anything.

Todd: Hey, I need your help in this situation.

Starr: Dad, Jack's not going to stay here without Mom.

Jack: I won't!

Todd: Uh -- what if Mom comes to visit?

Jack: No!

Starr: Dad, I'm not going back to Aunt Dorian's.

Todd: Well, I'm not going to separate you and your brother.

Starr: I'm not going.

Jack: I'm not staying.

Todd: All right. Your mother can stay.

Jack: Yes!

Todd: Is this yours?

Jack: Mm-hmm.

Todd: All right. Let's go upstairs, come on.

Jack: Yeah.

Starr: Congratulations, Mom.

Blair: What are you talking about?

Starr: You know exactly what I'm talking about. For what it's worth, keep it up. I won't get in your way.

On the next "One Life to Live" --

Evangeline: What are you doing?

Adriana: She's planning a hot evening with Clint.

Rex: And I bet you think this is the opportunity you've been waiting for.

Nash: You had me where you wanted me. Why did you let me off the hook?

Michael: Ok. What did Morgan tell you?

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