OLTL Transcript Monday 12/22/03

One Life to Live Transcript Monday 12/22/03

Provided by Eric
Proofread by Kathy

Viki: What's that?

Jessica: I think we should hang it.

Kevin: Only if you want to.

[Doorbell rings]

Viki: I'll get the door.

Viki: Dorian!

Dorian: Happy Holidays, Viki. We've made it through another year.


Blair: So, it's come to this, huh? Stealing presents from under a Christmas tree?

David: Oh, Mrs. Grinch. Shouldn't you and Mr. Grinch be in a cave on top of a mountain, tying antlers to a little dog's head? You know, I really hope that those rumors aren't true -- that you and Walker won't make it to New Year’s Eve.


Todd: Starr, I'm telling you, she knows. Now I want you go upstairs -- go upstairs and pack, and do it right now. Do it in a hurry. She could be back any minute.

Starr: I told you yesterday, and I've been telling you all day today -- no running!

Todd: Why not?

Starr: Because I would miss Mom too much and Jack would, too. Plus, you know that she'll send the cops after us and everything like that, and then we'll be on the run forever.

Todd: Did you see that document she wanted me to sign? She could fix it so we never see each other again.

Starr: Dad, you didn't sign it, okay, so calm down. We just have to try and be cool and maybe -- maybe there's a way that I can calm her down.

Todd: How?

Starr: I'm a child, okay? Give me a minute! You have any ideas?


Al: How am I supposed to figure out why this guy's an emotional train wreck when he doesn't talk to anybody?

Luna: Well, you got less than 24 hours. Find a way?

Michael: Hello! Hello! Anybody home?

Al: So all I have to do is figure out what makes Michael McBain tick and get him to perform three selfless deeds in 24 hours. Piece of cake.

Luna: Darling, keep your eyes on the prize. You do it and you'll be let back in Michael’s body, and then you got till Valentine's Day to get Marcie to fall back in love with you -- or him. God, you know what I mean.

Al: Luna --

Luna: Huh?

Al: This poor guy wouldn't know a good deed if it jumped out and bit him in the face, okay? He's totally self-centered.

Michael: Can I order before New Year's?

Roxy: Hey, would you put a sock in it, pal? I don't even work here. I'm just filling in for my daughter because I gave her these presents from her dead husband, and she freaked out and she went AWOL.

Michael: Fascinating. How about a drink?

Roxy: I don't even know where she is.


[Knock on door]


Joey: Kelly? Have you been here the whole time?

Kelly: Mm-hmm. It was a beautiful sermon.

Joey: Thanks. I didn't even know what I was saying. I was so distracted, I didn't even know you were here.

Kelly: Thinking about Jen?

Joey: I should've been thinking about the sermon, the congregation. It'd be better for everyone if I just go back to London.

Kelly: I'm really sorry, Joey. Having problems in your marriage, it's -- it's hard.

Joey: Are we talking about you or me?

Kelly: Well, I guess we're kind of in the same boat, aren't we?

Joey: Yeah. Jessie told me that Kevin moved back into Asa’s. How's that working?

Kelly: It's tense.

Joey: We're quite a pair. And the happiest time of the year.

Kelly: Yeah, right, alleged happiest time.

Joey: You used to love this time of year.

Kelly: When we were first dating, our first Christmas together -- that -- that was happy.

Joey: You got me that great writing desk.

Kelly: You know, I still wear those antique earrings you got me.

Joey: Really?

Kelly: Mm-hmm. Did you ever see that photograph I got for Kevin Christmas before last? The Civil War photograph?

Joey: Yeah, the daguerreotype of the Buchanan brothers.

Kelly: Mm-hmm.

Joey: How did you ever hunt that down?

Kelly: It was some work, but it was worth it. He was thrilled. I'll never forget the look on his face.


Kevin: I mean, it's this great Civil War portrait, right? Then I look down and I see the picture and I'm thinking, "How'd she track this down?" Yeah, it was a wonderful Christmas. Until she -- I just never thought it'd end like that.


Kelly: I never, never wanted Kevin to find out about the affair. I certainly didn't want him to find out on that day. Christmas. I crushed him. I'll never forget that look, either.


Kevin: It doesn't matter.

Jessica: Of course it matters, Kevin. If you want to talk about it --

Kevin: I don't to talk about it, okay? We both tried, we both made mistakes. It's over. Doesn't matter.

Viki: "The Survival Handbook."

Dorian: It seemed apropos, and I was fairly certain you hadn't already read it.

Viki: No, I haven’t. You know something? We should write a sequel to this so the next time we get snowed into a cave by an avalanche, we'll be prepared.

Dorian: Until we do, I'll expect you to memorize that one, cover to cover.

Viki: I will do that. I really will read it. Dorian, thank you so much for thinking of me. That's terrific. Would you like to come in?

Dorian: Oh, no, thank you. I have to be getting back. By the way, are you up to speed with what's going on with Todd and Blair?

Viki: Well, I know that Walker is worried that Blair knows who he is. Does she?

Dorian: If she does, she didn't hear about it from me.

Viki: Does she know?

Dorian: If she did, wouldn't she confront Walker?

Viki: That's a very good question.


Todd: I should've listened to your Aunt Viki. I should've told Blair everything last night when I had a chance. I just -- I got distracted. Maybe I should tell her tonight when she gets home.

Starr: No, that is the worst idea I've ever heard in my life. Plus, Mom will go through the roof.

Todd: Well, if she already knows --

Starr: Then we're sunk. There's just got to be some way to fix this.

Todd: Hey, come here.

Starr: What if this is the last time that you and Mom break up and -- and you'll never be together ever again?


Natalie: So, how did you find me? I didn't tell anybody where I was going.

John: Well, it's -- it's kind of what I do -- find people that don't want to be found. You used a credit card at the gas station in town.

Natalie: Why are you looking for me?

John: Roxy's worried.

Natalie: It was -- it was Cristian’s gift. I just -- I couldn't deal with it. And I'm not going back to Llanview, so don't even bother asking, please.

John: I just drove by to see if you're all right, and you're all right, so --

[John sniffs]

John: Are you -- you cooking something? What is -- don't even tell me that's macaroni and cheese.

Natalie: I picked up a box on my way up here. Want some?

John: Yeah.


Michael: A drink, some food. Why is that too much to ask?

Roxy: It's not too much to ask. I want to take your bar order first, okay? First things first.


Al: I don't know, Luna. I mean, I really don't know.


Michael: How long does it take to make a drink?

Roxy: I'm an artist, and an artist doesn't like to be rushed, okay?


Luna: Hey, might be a good time to get Michael started on deed number one.

Al: Um -- I don't have any idea what I'm supposed to be doing here, Luna.

Luna: Come on, pudding. Honey, the idea is right there inside of you. All you got to do is just trust your know-how. Good luck.

Al: Luna! Luna, where did you go? You can't leave me here all by myself!


Ron: Hey, what's the matter?

Marcie: That guy, Michael McBain. He was the one that got into that fight with Greg I was telling you about. And then he told me that --

Ron: What? Told you what?

Marcie: No, just forget about it.

Ron: I don't think so, Marcie. What did he say?

Marcie: He told me that he was Al.

Ron: What? What the hell does that mean?

Marcie: I have no idea.

Ron: You know what? Never mind. I'm going to make sure this guy never comes near you again.

Marcie: No. No, no, no. Don't, Ron. He's not worth it. Come on; sit down. Sit down.


Michael: You know, anybody with half a brain could run this place.

Roxy: Well, then go find someone else with half a brain. There's plenty of them. Stop messing with my holiday spirits.

Michael: Well, maybe messing with holiday spirits is your problem.


Marcie: Listen, why you can't lay off of her, Michael? Roxy may not have a medical degree, but she works a lot harder than you do.

Al: All right, Marcie.

Michael: You don't even know what's going on here.

Marcie: Why do you think that you can treat Roxy like garbage? You know, you think that the world owes you something.

Roxy: It owes him a good, swift kick in the keister.

Michael: What's with you? I saved your brother's life. Hello. You're right, Marcie. I -- I'm sorry. I was a jerk. I don't even know why I said any of those things. Sometimes I think I'm so smart, I -- I guess sometimes I just don't get it, do I?

Marcie: I guess not.

Al: Yes, yes!


Kelly: Joey, let's -- let's think about spring, okay? Let's just think about spring, flowers, and spring training. Spring anything.

Joey: That's a wonderful idea.

Kelly: Oh --

Joey: Hi.

Kelly: Hey.

Joey: This is Kelly. Can you tell me your name? Is your mommy around?

Kelly: No?

Joey: I'm going to go check outside and see if anyone's there.

Kelly: Okay.

Joey: Can you hang out with him for a minute?

Kelly: Yeah, yeah, of course, of course.

Joey: Okay. Okay, you hang out with Kelly, okay?

Kelly: Hey. Were you just outside? No? Let's see.


Kevin: I don't know, maybe having a child would change things for Kelly and me. You know, it's not like I don't want another child.

Jessica: Don't you think that maybe you should have a healthy marriage first?


Dorian: Oh, it's been years since I've seen these.

Viki: I know. Me, too. I actually found them way in the back of the cupboard. I thought I'd put them out.

Dorian: Yes, well, your father loved them.

Viki: Yes, he did. Say what you will about my father, but he loved Christmas, didn't he?

Dorian: Yes, indeed.

Viki: Yes, he always had eggnog and the goblets, and the house was always decorated so beautifully.

Dorian: I remember that.

Viki: There was another side to him, Dorian, wasn't there? The side that was generous and full of life. I remember -- I remember one Christmas I came over. The house was filled with carolers. He had invited them all in for eggnog, cookies. It looked like he was hosting the whole neighborhood. And when he saw me come in, he smiled at me so genuinely and so warmly. "Merry Christmas, Victoria," he said. Despite all the horrible things he did to me, that I remember as being a real Christmas wish from a loving father.

Dorian: Well, given that your memories of your father are so tainted, it's -- it's good that you have one perfect Christmas memory.

Viki: You know what? This is going to be another one.

Dorian: Oh, let's not go too far.

Viki: No, no, no, I mean it. It will be. Hang on a second, would you? I was going to bring this by later, but since you're here --

Dorian: Viki, you shouldn't have! But I'm very glad you did.

[Viki laughs]

Dorian: Thank you so much.

Viki: You're welcome. Please, will you come back later and celebrate with us, will you?

Dorian: Oh, well, maybe I will accept that very kind invitation. Thank you.

Viki: Thank you.

Dorian: Bye-bye.

Viki: Goodbye, Dorian.


Luna: There you go, sweet pea.

Al: Selfless good deed number one.

Luna: Mm-hmm. Selfless good deed uno.


Roxy: That was decent of you because Marcie’s been through hell.

Michael: Yeah. It's a bummer about her boyfriend. But, you know, things are tough all over.

Roxy: Oh, it's tough? You got to work through the holidays?

Michael: Doesn't matter. I haven't been home to see my family since I went off to boarding school when I was 12 years old.

Roxy: Ooh-la-la. Boarding school.

Michael: Mm-hmm, a full scholarship kid. And my first year there, all the rich kids went home for the holidays, so I had the whole place to myself. Which would've been neat, except it was Christmas. My mom couldn't scratch together enough money to get me home, so I packed a bag and I hid. I let the guys think I went back to Jersey. And so, when they left, I went back to my dorm and I spent Christmas in the student lounge watching "It's a Wonderful Life."


John: You never think a scholarship's going to not include train fare home for Christmas.

Natalie: There was no way? I mean, you didn't try or --

John: I told Michael I'd send him the money, and he said he had to study.

Natalie: You didn't buy it?

John: No. He was just too proud to take a handout from his brother.

Natalie: Was your mom upset?

John: Well, Dad -- Dad had died a year earlier, and I think she just wanted her boys with her for Christmas.

Natalie: What?

John: Nothing. No, I just had this -- I remember I told her I would try to be both Michael and me that night, you know? So I sort of set these two chairs side by side, and we had two place settings, and for a while I'd sort of skip back and forth between the two chairs, and when I was in his chair, I would say things he would say, and then I would jump back over to my chair and argue back and forth with him. She thought it was pretty funny.

Natalie: Seemed like you must've known him pretty well.

John: I don't know. I know that he and Mom were never -- I mean, they tried, but they were never close. They tried, but they could never quite break down those walls that they had put up between each other. Okay, that's enough. It's your turn.


David: Ho-ho-ho!

Dorian: Am I going to have to tie a bell around your neck?

David: You can try.

Dorian: Did you find us a long-lost Cramer to inherit Aunt Betsy’s fortune?

David: Uh -- no, not yet. But Blair stopped by. She said to say hi.

Dorian: Thank you. What are you doing here?

David: You know, she seemed upset. Blair, I mean.

Dorian: I know who you mean. What are you doing here?

David: I was -- I brought a -- I left something for you.

Dorian: Sorry. What are you talking about?

David: I brought you a present.

Dorian: Excuse me?

David: I brought you a present! A Christmas present! Don't get all gooey about it, all right?

Dorian: Oh! Where is it?

David: It's over -- it's Christmas. You know where it is. Just let me get out of here before you open it, all right?

Dorian: No, I want you with me when I open it.

[David sighs]

David: Do I have to?

Dorian: You do. That is, if you want to get the present I got you.


Starr: This is the worst Christmas of all Christmases.

Todd: No way. I lived through the worst Christmas of all Christmases. And even then, that turned out okay.

Starr: Are you cracking up or are you lying to me?

Todd: No, I'm telling you. It actually turned out to be the best Christmas, thanks to your mom.

Todd: It was a moldy, old hotel. I was drinking cheep beer, I had no presents, no friends, no family. Worst Christmas tree you ever saw. It was awful. Till your mom showed up.

Starr: Really?

Todd: Mm-hmm. And she gave me my only gift. And she gave me my only gift. It was a beauty, though.

Starr: What was it?

Todd: Well, that's between her and me.

Starr: That's nice.

Todd: But it turned out okay. It's going to turn out okay this time.

Starr: That was a great story.

Blair: Well, it must've been. You want to share?


Joey: I didn't see anyone out on the street. Can't get ahold of Child Services, but the police say they'd try to make him real comfortable at the station.

Kelly: No, no, no.

Joey: Well, I guess we could put him up at the community center.

Kelly: No, I will take him.

Joey: Kelly --

Kelly: No -- listen, he's not going to go to some community center and be lost and abandoned, not tonight. I am the Lieutenant Governor's wife. If somebody has a problem with it, they can take it up with my husband. He'll be fine.

Jen: I'll just -- uh -- come back later.

Kelly: No, no, that's all right. I'm leaving. Hey, are you hungry? Why don't you come with me? I know someplace where they have cookies. Come on. We'll get you a big piece of paper to draw on. See you later.

Joey: Thanks, Kel.

Jen: I got your message. Why'd you want me to meet you here?

Joey: I wanted to talk about us. Jen, I don't care what's happened. I -- I just want us to get back to being happy.

Jen: Were we?

Joey: Happy? I was. Weren't you? Jen, I just want you to give us another chance. Okay, come -- come with me and hang out with my family. I'm leaving right after Christmas. Just -- can we please spend this time together?


Al: Hey. Now --

Luna: Uh-huh?

Al: I've been thinking about it, okay?

Luna: Okay.

Al: Listen; what Michael learned in boarding school was that he had to fend for himself. He could basically rely on nobody.

Luna: Right, right.

Al: Now, if he hadn't left home --

Luna: Uh-huh?

Al: And he had stayed with his Mom and John --

Luna: Right.

Al: He might be a completely different person.

Luna: You are getting the picture, baby doll! Don't forget, you still got to get him to perform two good deeds, though, okay?


Roxy: So Corinne -- that's my stupid sister-in-law -- she snatches Rexy -- that's my son -- and she drags him off to the wild in Michigan. I don't think Nattie ever forgave me for that.

Michael: Did you forgive you?

Roxy: Never. No way. Tried to get my act together and I wanted to have a nice Christmas for Natalie, but, lo and behold, Christmas Eve, there's not one Christmas gift under the tree because I was flat-busted broke.

Michael: Casino, right? You were living right there in A.C.

Roxy: Yeah, man. Well, where else do you get something for nothing? So I kept on thinking about these, you know, toys and games for Nattie, and, you know, I'm playing and I'm winning, and I'm up about half a grand --

Michael: Until you went bust.

Roxy: It's kind of like you were there.

Michael: So then what'd you do?

Roxy: What else? I went out and I got even drunker with some no-name guy who wanted to buy. I couldn't go home because the look on her face would've killed me.


Natalie: And here it is, Christmastime, and she left me all by myself Christmas Eve. My own mother, you know? The one person you're supposed to be able to depend on, and she just leaves me alone. Totally alone on the biggest family holiday of the year. It's -- how could he do that?

John: "He"?

Natalie: What? No, my mother.

John: You said "he," -- "how could he do that?"

Natalie: No, I -- I didn’t. What difference does it make?

John: I think maybe you were thinking about Cris.

Natalie: What -- why would I say anything about Cris? Why would I say that? We were just married, okay? How could he let Flynn just drag him off like that?

John: He was trying to protect you.

Natalie: Then -- then he should've protected me by staying alive! He -- he should've fought harder to get away! He -- he should not have left me alone on Christmas!

John: It's okay to be mad.

Natalie: Oh, how can I be? He's dead.

John: Nat, it's okay to feel whatever you're feeling. And it's okay to forgive him. Hey -- it's okay to forgive him. Look at me.

John: Hey.

John: Hey. Hey. You want to go home?

Natalie: I don't know.

John: Nobody should be alone on Christmas. Let's get you back.


Viki: Would you like to have a cookie? Take it; go ahead. Good boy.

Kelly: So we'll be looking after him until we can locate his parents.

Viki: Well, that's lovely. Why don't we get him inside and then get him comfortable and warm, and I bet you we find something under the tree for him.

Kelly: I bet we could. I promised I'd get him something to draw on, some paper.

Kevin: Oh. Oh, I'll get it.

Kelly: Okay.

Viki: So, Sweetheart, what's your name? Do we know?

Kelly: I don't think he's ready to tell us yet.

Viki: Why don't you come with me, and we'll go see the Christmas tree.

Kelly: Let's go see the tree.

Viki: There you go.


[Phone rings]

Jessica: Hello? Antonio, hi. How's Puerto Rico? Oh, you know, a green Christmas is nice, too. Any word on Adriana? Nothing at all? Oh, you know, you're going to find her. It's okay. Oh, Jamie, she's fine. She -- she misses you a lot, though, but you know, R.J. and Carlotta are so happy to have her. Well, it's going to be really Christmas when you get home. I miss you, too. I love you. Hurry home. Bye.

Viki: Antonio?

Jessica: Yeah.

Viki: Is everything all right with him?

Jessica: He's so strong, because I -- I can't bear to think how he and Carlotta are feeling without Cristian.

Viki: I wish there was something we could do for them. Do you think there's anything Carlotta needs?

Jessica: No, I don't think so.

Viki: No?

Jessica: No.

Viki: Sweetheart, have you heard from Natalie, or spoken to her?

Jessica: No. Haven't you?

Viki: Well, no, I haven't, and Roxy called. She was covering her shift and she was trying to reach her, but -- I don't know -- I can't reach Natalie. I'm a little worried about her.


Roxy: Well, you know, you had me worried sick, you know that, kiddo?

Natalie: I'm sorry.

Roxy: Hey, did you find her?

John: Ah --

Roxy: You remember the night that I left you alone on Christmas? We'll I've been feeling terrible about that. I've been feeling terrible about that for years. You forgive me?

Natalie: Do you forgive me for worrying you? Well, of course I forgive you. I'm sorry. I'm sorry I worried you.

Roxy: It's okay. Anyway, Larry’s filling in for you, so you want to go to Viki's?

Natalie: Yeah, yeah. Let me just -- I got to get something first, okay?

John: Hey, look; you two have a good time, all right?

Roxy: You want to come with?

John: No, I got work to do.

Roxy: It's Christmas Eve.

John: "No rest for the wicked" or something like that, right?

Roxy: Something like that.

John: Hmm.

Roxy: Okay, just be a second.

Natalie: Thank you for finding me, looking for me. And --

Roxy: Okay, baby, we are going to get in our duds and we are going to go party.


John: Yeah, party.

John: Hey, Michael.

Michael: Hey.

John: Look; I just wanted to say -- Merry Christmas, Michael.


Todd: Uh -- Starr asked, so I was telling her about my best Christmas memory.

Blair: Oh. You know, your little brother, Jack, was a Christmas present -- kind of -- from your daddy, too. Actually, he was a really wonderful Christmas present -- well, until I found out, of course, that he was lying to me. And this time it was about who Jack really was. Hmm. My own dear, little boy, and he was lying to me. Well, let's get ready to go to Viki’s. Shall we?

Starr: That was too weird.

Todd: Yeah.


Dorian: Oh, David, it's beautiful!

David: Oh, Dorian, I love this!

Dorian: Oh. My, my, my.

David: What?

Dorian: You got the key chain monogrammed with the letter D. What, wasn't it masculine enough for you?

David: What are you talking about?

Dorian: Oh, this is obviously a re-gift. Come on; tell me who gave it to you.

David: I bought that for you, Dorian. You're always misplacing your keys, you know. Well, what about this? A monogrammed business card holder with the letter D? That could be a gift or maybe a re-gift, as the case may be.

Dorian: I picked that out for you.

David: I picked that out for you.

Dorian: Oh, my. We're really a Christmasy pair, aren't we? I guess we're going to have to learn to trust each other.

David: I guess it's never too late to try new things.

Dorian: That's true.

David: After all, there are quite a few new things we could try. And a few of the old things that we haven't tried in a long time.

Dorian: Don't even go there.

David: You know it's really quite sad. All those missed opportunities.

Dorian: Yes, there always is something sad --

Dorian: All right, not that I'm complaining, but what is this all about?

David: Mistletoe.

Dorian: All I see are some cobwebs up on the ceiling.

David: I could've sworn --

Dorian: You know, Rosa’s going to get a lump of coal in her stocking.

David: All right, I apologize for kissing you under false pretenses.

Dorian: Just make sure it doesn't happen again.

David: You have my word.

Dorian: Mm-hmm.


Michael: So, how's your case going?

John: I hate this case.

Michael: Did you ever like a serial-killer case?

John: Well -- no. You working tonight?

Michael: It keeps me off the streets.

John: And the streets are better for it.

Michael: Who started that, anyway?

John: That would be Dad.

Michael: Figures. But sometimes I think Mom pined for him so much because neither one of us joked around the way he did.

John: You may be right.

Michael: What do you say I drive us home to A.C. on Christmas after I finish my shift? You know, we'll surprise Mom.

John: Yeah, I think that would -- that'd be great.


Al: Good deed number two.

Luna: You are cookin with gas!

Al: Good. Because the sooner I get into Michael’s body, the sooner I can make Marcie fall in love with me.

Luna: Yeah. It'll be just that easy.


Natalie: Sorry I worried you, Mom.

Viki: It's all right, Sweetheart. I'm just glad you're safe. Merry Christmas.

Natalie: Love you. Merry Christmas.

Viki: Love you.

Roxy: Merry Christmas, Vik.

Viki: Oh. Merry --

Roxy: You know, someone should decorate that sling.

Viki: Yeah. Maybe you can do it later with nail polish.

[Viki and Roxy laugh]

Roxy: That's a good idea.

Viki: Thank you. Oh -- Jen! Joey, darling.

Jen: Merry Christmas.

Viki: Merry Christmas, both of you. Merry Christmas, Sweetheart. I'm glad you're here. Oh, hi!

Starr: Merry Christmas!

Viki: Merry Christmas, Starr! Merry Christmas, Sweetheart.

Blair: Merry Christmas. You look beautiful.

Viki: Blair, Merry Christmas.

Blair: I'm going to go look at your Christmas tree. Come on in; let's go look at the tree.

Starr: It's freezing out there.

Blair: There we go.

Viki: Everything alright between you and Blair?

Todd: There's no change. It's kind of a truce.

Viki: Oh. So you haven't told her? Honey, you got to get it out --

Todd: Yeah, I know, I know.

Viki: Okay. Okay. Come on in.

[Doorbell rings]

Viki: Excuse me. Oh!

Carolers: Angels we have heard on high sweetly singing o'er the plains and the mountains in reply echoing their joyful strains gloria in excelsis deo Gloria

Viki: Merry Christmas, Victoria.

Carolers: In excelsis deo

Stay tuned for scenes from the next "One Life to Live"


On the next "One Life to Live" --

Jen: I am with Joe and his family.

Rex: I thought that was over.

Natalie: You're here. Why don't you just stay?

Marcie: You're a total jerk.

Al: This is a lost cause, Luna.

Todd: I haven't told you the whole truth.

Blair: What are you talking about?

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