GH Transcript Thursday 4/9/09

General Hospital Transcript Thursday 4/9/09

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Provided By Laurie R.
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Lulu: You are getting emotionally involved because she's Emily's double. That's not normal behavior.

Nikolas: I'm enjoying her company.

Lulu: Because it's like being with Emily?

Nikolas: Okay, look. I know the difference.

Lulu: Really? Really? Because Rebecca might have breast cancer, just like Emily did, and if you go through this with her, let's be honest, it could blur the line completely.

Tracy: Shut up, spumoni. If you want to make an effective P.I., you have to stop babbling and listen. I want you to get everything you can on Ethan Lovett's past. I don't trust him as far as I can throw him.

Ethan: So, how long have you lived in the shackles?

Rebecca: Actually, new in town.

Ethan: Oh, so am I. What a coincidence. I wonder what else we have in common.

Rebecca: Are you flirting with me?

Ethan: Oh, that depends. Is it working?

Tracy: Well, you two make a lovely couple. Why don't you get to know each other better?

Maxie: It is official. You have the social skills of, uh --

Matt: The man of your dreams?

Maxie: A sloth. Did you see Freddieís expression when you insulted his shoes?

Matt: Really? I just thought he had indigestion.

Maxie: And then -- and then that model was so grossed out when you explained a gallbladder operation in revolting detail.

Matt: The old man that she was with really liked my story. Plus, do -- do you know that he asked for my card?

Maxie: Yeah, to ban you from his guest list for eternity.

Matt: So I had a good time. Shoot me.

Maxie: I think Kate will probably do that for me when she finds out what a disaster this was.

Kate: Well, congratulations. I hear you two had a very successful appearance today.

Sam: So I have bad news about McCall-Jackal agency. It is a non-starter.

Jason: What did Spinelli do?

Sam: No, it's not Spinelli. He's -- he's definitely not the problem this time. My application was denied, and not because I didn't pass the test, because I did. I did actually very well. It's that I don't have enough experience.

Jason: There's got to be a way around it.

Sam: I know. I've been -- I've been thinking about it, but I can't come up with anything, so I really just wanted to come over here and say thank you very much for offering to, you know, take care of Spinelli's half. I do appreciate that, and I am really very sorry that this all didn't work out.

Jason: Yeah, me, too. What about you? I mean, I know you wanted this pretty bad.

Sonny: Any particular reason you've got your legs up in the air?

Claudia: I'm doing yoga.

Sonny: Yeah, okay. Like hell you are.

Sonny: You're not the yoga type.

Claudia: What are you talking about? There's no type that does yoga.

Sonny: Yeah, there is a type. People who meditate, who try to find their inner peace.

Claudia: Well, hey, maybe that's what I'm looking for, inner peace.

Sonny: It would take you a long time to find your inner peace. I'll tell you that.

Claudia: You know what? Yoga happens to be a very popular form of exercise, and it's great for relieving stress.

Sonny: Really?

Claudia: Mm-hmm.

Sonny: So you're saying being married to me is stressful?

Claudia: It's also good for our sex life. It's why I'm so flexible.

Sonny: You got a charley horse or something?

Claudia: No, this is a pose. It's, uh, the -- fertile mushroom?

Sonny: The fertile what?

Claudia: Mushroom.

Sonny: Fertile mushroom? Okay, good luck with your inner peace.

Sam: I -- I guess I'm just thinking I'm going to look for an established P.I. to apprentice with and get enough hours, then, voila! I'll have my license.

Jason: Well, I don't suppose I could convince, you know, whoever you might go to work for to take Spinelli, too?

Sam: Aw.

[Knock on door]

Bernie: Hey.

Jason: Hey, Bernie.

Bernie: Got some business I need to discuss --

Spinelli: Ah, how fortuitous that the bernificent one's timing could not be better.

Jason: No.

Bernie: Hey, Spinelli, I need to discuss something with Mr. Morgan.

Spinelli: Yeah, but you are the answer to our dilemma. Fair Samantha informed me that plans to open Jackal-McCall P.I. --

Sam: Uh, McCall-Jackal.

Spinelli: Right. The name of the firm is open for debate still. But, um, the future remains in doubt, because we have not yet procured a state-approved license. So I went online, and --

Sam: Wait, wait. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. You cannot go online and go under any -- any government website and tamper with anything that has to do with my license. It's illegal.

Spinelli: Yes, I'm well aware of that sobering fact, and I have learned my lesson. However, I do have valuable information.

Sam: Oh, okay. We're listening.

Spinelli: So, I -- I perused the web, probing the possibility that someone of our acquaintance might be of assistance, and learned, to my surprise, that the bernificent one is also a gumshoe.

Sam: No way.

Jason: Bernie, you're a P.I.?

Bernie: Why is that hard to believe?

Maxie: Whoever you talked to is trying to sabotage the magazine.  Matt was a disaster, and I spent the entire night doing damage control.

Matt: Oh, pay no attention. We were the life of the party.

Maxie: Yeah. I mean, you complimented a model on her breasts, and then you asked her how long she had them. And then there was the gallbladder operation conversation.

Matt: And yes, that happens to be cutting edge medicine.

Kate: Well, Rupert Whitestone, the media mogul, was impressed. In fact, his people called. I take it that you were the one who mentioned "Crimson"?

Matt: Yes, I told him that we were the magazine's representatives.

Maxie: Well, it would've been me if you let me get a word in edgewise.

Kate: Well, Rupert was so impressed that he's going to offer "Crimson" an exclusive on Kate for her next upcoming movie with Rupertís company.

Matt: That's great.

Maxie: Yeah, that is great, and it has nothing to do with Matt and everything to do the breakout success of "Crimson."

Kate: Well, it doesn't hurt that Matt was so charming.

Maxie: He's a social leper. If you let him out again, "Crimson" will be a laughing stock.

Kate: What's your assessment of the afternoon?

Matt: Oh, I had a great time, and, well, I would love to do it again.

Lulu's voice: Michael's got a bullet in his head, so let's go out and shoot someone else.

Johnny's voice: Come on, Lulu.

Lulu's voice: No, this is sick. Don't you get it? To solve your problems by picking up a gun? And guess what? It doesn't fix anything. You shoot them, they shoot you, and soon nobody even knows where this hatred even started or who did the most wrong. You're killing just to kill, and a little boy gets caught in the middle. God, what if he dies? What is Carly going to do?

Johnny: I would rather take the bullet for Michael than live with this, because you know what? You're right. It is my fault, and Sonny's fault, and Jasonís, and my father's, and all of us who live like this, who kill each other for power and money and then turn right around and lie and say that we have honor, that we protect families, that women and children are safe, and it's a bunch of crap. Even if Michael makes it out of this alive, he's screwed. Violence is what he's grown up with. It's what's inside of him, and even if he wants out, there's no way he's getting away from it.

Lulu: Maybe that is the lie that you tell yourself, but I don't believe it. You could walk away any time that you want. You just don't want to. No matter how angry you are that Michael got shot, you're not angry enough to change anything, or am I wrong? Is anything going to be different tomorrow?

Johnny: No.

Lulu: I pity you, I really do. Because part of you knows that this is seriously wrong, but what I don't understand is why you won't do anything to change it before you end up like your father.

Nikolas: I've heard all the warnings from Lucky and Alexis. I -- I understand the concern.

Lulu: Yeah, but would you have given Rebecca the time of day if she wasn't Emily's double?

Nikolas: I --

Lulu: She works at the hospital. There are tons of gorgeous women at the hospital that you don't pay attention to.

Nikolas: That -- that's a moot point, Lulu. I do know Rebecca, and I'm not just going to turn my back on her.

Lulu: While she goes through the same ordeal that almost killed Emily.

Nikolas: Well, it's because of what Emily went through that I understand what Rebecca's going through. She had a hole punched through her breast knowing that it could be cancer.

Lulu: Yes, that's terrifying.

Nikolas: Yeah, it is, and I intend to see her through this every step of the way.

Rebecca: You want me and Ethan to go out? Why do you even care?

Tracy: Just a suggestion. You seem to be enjoying each other.

Ethan: Well, it's a bonzer idea, but I couldn't possibly ditch Lulu.

Tracy: Oh, ditch away. She won't mind.

Lulu: Well, it's been fun, but I've got to go back to work.

Tracy: Oh, by all means, go. Hop like a bunny.

Ethan: Oh, I'm sure the fashion world can live without you for a day.

Lulu: Tell that to my boss.

Ethan: Well, what about my boss? You robbed me blind while we were playing poker. I deserve a chance to get even.

Lulu: I was beating you, fair and square.

Ethan: Admit it. You pilfered the cash box.

Lulu: Only because you were cheating. We should play again just so I can teach you a lesson.

Ethan: Yeah, tough talk. Let's see if you can back it up.

Tracy: Unlike you, Lulu honors her responsibilities, right?

Lulu: That sounds dull as dirt, but she's right. I've got to go.

Ethan: Scared?

Lulu: [Laughs] Yeah, you keep telling yourself that.

Ethan: Why do I get the feeling you don't like me being with Lulu?

Rebecca: Hit me.

Ethan: The book says --

Rebecca: Hit me.

Ethan: 21. That was a risky move.

Rebecca: Hmm, I guess I'm feeling lucky.

Nikolas: Yeah, uh -- yeah, go ahead and give me another card there.

Rebecca: Guess you are, too.

Ethan: Bust. Sorry. The lady wins again.

Nikolas: Well, clearly, I'm in the presence of a superior player, I guess.

Ethan: Or a skilled counter, I suspect.

Rebecca: Maybe I just know how to follow my hunches.

Nikolas: Yeah, please tell me, what is your secret?

Tracy: Do tell. Inquiring minds want to know.

Rebecca: You already made it clear what you think of me at your family's home.

Tracy: Did I?

Rebecca: Yeah, you did. You all but called me a swindler, which is odd, since you've never met me in your life.

Tracy: You are the spitting image of Emily Quartermaine, and when you came to our house, butter would melt in your mouth. Forgive me. A red flag popped up.

Nikolas: That's enough, Tracy.

Rebecca: You -- you're entitled to your little opinion, Tracy. I just don't appreciate you staring at me when I'm trying to play cards.

Tracy: I happen to be part owner of this casino, which gives me the right to kick you to the curb anytime I like.

Nikolas: All right. Apologize to her.

Maxie: Kate, this is non-negotiable. Matt cannot be my date again.

Matt: Oh, Maxie, would you stop? You had a great time.

Maxie: It was awful. I swear.

Lulu: So, how did it go?

Kate: Wow, Lulu, I have to hand it to you. Suggesting Matt as a replacement was a very helpful idea.

Lulu: Really?

Kate: Mm-hmm. Yes, apparently Matt made quite the impression on Rupert.

Lulu: Oh, my gosh. That's great.

Maxie: Yeah, but next time he could crash and burn, so why don't we quit while we're ahead?

Matt: Seems to me we're just getting started.

Maxie: Well, I was on a roll with Johnny, and we had amazing feedback.

Lulu: Yeah, but that's the problem. You and Johnny are in danger of becoming old news.

Kate: Oh, you know, Lulu does have a point. The public's attention span is short.

Matt: Well, if Kate needs me to escort you to these events, I'd be more than happy to help out.

Maxie: But it's Johnnyís job. He's -- he's still fresh and new.

Lulu: And expensive. Think of all the money that we would save.

Matt: You paid Johnny? I would be insulted if -- if I was offered money to escort Maxie. Really, the pleasure of your company is more than enough for me.

Spinelli: It was indeed a surprise to discover this heretofore unknown side of the bernificent one. In fact, I -- I thought I'd stumbled upon an error at first.

Bernie: Yeah, I -- I just don't understand why it's such a shock to learn that I'd been a P.I.

Sam: No, no, no. It's not a shock at all. It's just that you're -- you're always so businesslike, and you've clearly never mentioned it.

Spinelli: Yes, I concur. In fact, I'm not sure you've ever spoken about your gumshoe past.

Bernie: It's just never come up in conversation, that's all.

Jason: What kind of work did you do, exactly?

Bernie: You know, audits, financial fraud, white collar stuff.

Spinelli: Yeah, but nevertheless, the P.I. license of one Bernard K. Abrams remains active and could be used to open a state-certified office.

Bernie: Yeah, yeah. I'm not going to open an agency.

Spinelli: No, no, no. Not to worry. You would just be the figurehead. All the investigations would be Miss McCall and myself.

Bernie: Yeah, with my name and my reputation.

Sam: We would not let you down. I promise.

Bernie: I know you -- that you would be very professional, Miss McCall, but that -- that's not my concern. Frankly, my concern is -- is Spinelli.

Jason: Bernie, Spinelli is a very hard worker.

Bernie: Oh, yeah, well -- look. I'm sorry, Spinelli, but just think of the trouble he's caused you, costly mistakes, FBI entanglements. I -- I'd just rather not take the risk.

Spinelli: I assure you, I would take exceeding care performing my duties within strict legal limits.

Bernie: Mm-hmm. I know that you mean well, Spinelli, but you can't help yourself, and I don't want to get in trouble with the law.

Jason: Bernie, I want this to work. So what do we need to do to make it happen?

Johnny: Oh, you took your sweet ass time getting here.

Claudia: I got busy, sorry. How are you? Are you okay?

Johnny: Yeah, I'm jumping through hoops to make sure you are. Ric still has the DVD.

Claudia: He's not going to show it to Sonny.

Johnny: Only if we can get enough evidence against Sonny and Jason that Ric can take to the feds. Claudia, you should've moved out of town when I told you.

Claudia: I'm going to be okay, Johnny.

Johnny: Don't be so sure about that. It's going to take a long time for me to gain Sonny's trust. In the meantime, you need to make sure Ric doesn't show Sonny the DVD.

Claudia: I won't have to do that if I can get pregnant with Sonny's child.

Ric: Sonny, is your lovely wife at home?

Sonny: Uh, she went out. Why?

Ric: We have a lot to discuss, and I'd prefer it if Claudia weren't in the room or peering through a keyhole.

Sonny: Why are you working so hard to undermine Claudia?

Ric: Why are you suddenly so willing to trust her?

Sonny: Because we understand each other, and she's been straight with me.

Ric: Oh, I see. So I save your life by warning you about an ambush. I don't hear you waxing so eloquently about my loyalty.

Sonny: Because you always have an ulterior motive.

Ric: No, not this time, Sonny, okay?

Sonny: Okay.

Ric: You can't trust your wife. I'm just telling you, you should keep your eyes open.

Sonny: I'm happy with my marriage. I'm tired of the innuendos, and if you've got something to say, say it, Ric, because I'm not going to Ė

Ric: Okay, look, Sonny. There's no tactful way to put this. I'm here about Michaelís shooting.

Tracy: Apologize for what?  I meant every word.

Nikolas: An insult to her is an insult to me.

Rebecca: Nikolas, I appreciate the defense, but she's not worth it.

Tracy: Here you have it. Even Rebecca knows I don't owe her an apology.

Nikolas: Well, given the current status of this establishment, I suggest you make a concerted effort towards the few remaining customers here.

Tracy: Nikolas, I don't care about your money, and I don't care much for you. You're obviously a nut job.

Nikolas: I could say the same about you, Tracy. Let's go.

Tracy: Nikolas, you have clearly latched onto this girl because she's Emily's double, but have you ever once for a moment questioned what brought her to Port Charles in the first place and why she's still here?

Nikolas: We're leaving.

Rebecca: Do you believe her? Do you think I have an agenda?

Lulu: Since Johnny is my boyfriend, I have no complaints about the $1,000 an appearance you've been paying him.

Maxie: Except it makes you spit nails to see Johnny with me.

Lulu: I just want what's best for the magazine, and we're trying to keep the budget down. Johnny is a big expense.

Kate: And that is certainly something to consider.

Maxie: Matt's a doctor. What -- what if he's got some hernia operation? He's not going to drop it just to go to a club opening.

Kate: Okay, that's a good point. Is your schedule going to be a problem?

Matt: Yes, it might.

Maxie: See? Saving lives comes first.

Matt: But there is one way that I would reconsider.

Maxie: Tell me.

Matt: If you go on a date with me. Just one real date, then you'll never have to suffer through another day like this. Come on, what do you say?

Maxie: One real date? Fine.

Kate: Okay. Who you date is your business, not mine, all right? As Lulu has already pointed out, Matt has made a favorable impression, he's inexpensive, so Matt, if you want the job, it's yours.

Matt: I'm afraid that my medical obligations have to take priority.

Kate: Fine.

Matt: So you'll have to make due with Johnny after all. I'll call you about our date.

Kate: Okay, ladies, enough with this nonsense. Get back to work. We have a magazine to publish.

Lulu: Good luck with Matt. I'm sure he'll grow on you.

Maxie: Oh, I'm going to make sure you pay.

Bernie: Look, Mr. Morgan, I understand. You -- you want to help your friends, but this partnership, it -- it's ill-advised.

Spinelli: The intrepid duo of McCall and Jackal shall make you proud.

Bernie: I'm -- I'm a meticulous man, Mr. Morgan. You know I like to be in control.

Sam: Well, I will keep you updated with daily reports on everything.

Bernie: That's not what I'm concerned about.

Spinelli: McCall and Jackal shall drag justice out of roach-infested corners into the cold, harsh light of day. Evildoers will be rooted out, malefactors vanquished. No bad deed will go unpunished while McCall and Jackal prowl the streets.

Bernie: That's what I'm concerned about. Spinelli, you let your imagination run wild.

Jason: Bernie, we know he's made mistakes, but he's done a lot of great stuff for us. He's honest, he's trustworthy, he's loyal.

Spinelli: Yeah, and -- and determined to do an exemplary job, whether it be conducting a stakeout or -- or chasing a wrongdoer down an alleyway.

Bernie: Okay, listen to me. Most P.I. work, it's very boring. It's looking over bank statements, phone records, you do background checks.

Sam: I know. I -- I absolutely realize that. I'm the one who started this whole P.I. license thing, and -- and Bernie, it is work that I understand, that I -- I know that I will be good at, and Spinelli is invaluable in the office doing research and everything like that.

Spinelli: Of course, until I prove my value in the field.

Sam: I promise -- I promise that you will not regret being associated with this agency, even if it's only on paper. Please?

Jason: Bernie, there will be no risk to you. I will personally guarantee Spinelli's good behavior.

Bernie: Okay. As long as I have your assurances, Mr. Morgan, I will agree.

Spinelli: Oh, most gracious day, bernificent one.

Bernie: Reservations. Yeah.

Sonny: Be careful when you talk about my son.

Ric: You see, that's why Jason thinks that he can get away with it.

Sonny: Jason -- what's Jason have to do with it?

Ric: I went to the warehouse, Sonny, on the anniversary of Michaelís shooting, okay? Jason was there. He found me there, he put a gun to my head, and he accused me that I was trying to cover my tracks. He wants to believe that I had something to do with Michaelís shooting.

Sonny: Did you?

Ric: Sonny, on my daughter's life, I had nothing to do with it, okay? But Jasonís been looking for a reason to dump me in the river, and he may very well use Michael to do it.

Sonny: So you -- you've come here to warn me?

Ric: No, this is -- more than my life is at stake here. If Jason leads you down this road, you may never find out who actually was involved with Michaelís shooting.

Johnny: Tell me I didn't just hear you right. You are not going to try and get pregnant with Sonny's kid.

Claudia: Damn straight I am. Come on, I've been luring the man into bed every chance I get.

Johnny: Oh, way too much information.

Claudia: Oh, then you should've seen me an hour ago. He walked in on me with my legs up in the air.

Johnny: Oh, come on.

Claudia: And I told him I was doing yoga.

Johnny: Claudia, this is insane. You don't want to be a mother, let alone bring a child into this life.

Claudia: John, my life is on the line here, and so is yours. If you're right, it's only a matter of time before Sonny finds out that I hired Michaelís shooter, and then he's going to kill me. This is the only way to save my life.

Nikolas: Would I spending all this time with you if I thought you had an agenda?

Rebecca: No. But it is a coincidence that I look like Emily, and, you know, I am here in Port Charles.

Nikolas: We've been over this already. I'm completely satisfied that you have no connection to Emily. And I apologize for Tracyís paranoia.

Rebecca: Don't apologize. I had more fun today than I've had in a long time.

Ethan: Why did you chase them off like that?

Tracy: Rebecca was on a winning streak.

Ethan: Nikolas was losing twice as much. He clearly has deep pockets. We could have turned a pretty profit.

Tracy: I don't trust that girl.

Ethan: Mrs. Spencer, you are a delightful woman. You're charming, gracious, and need I mention rich? But you're entirely too suspicious.

Tracy: I hope you were listening to every single thing I said to that girl, because it all goes for you, too.

Lulu: Why are you so upset? I think you and Matt make a very cute couple.

Maxie: Do you think this is funny, Lulu, being blackmailed into going out with someone that you can't stand?

Lulu: I told you I didn't like you going on P.R. dates.

Maxie: And I already told you that your paranoia is out of control.

Lulu: I know you, Maxie. You ruin things, even when they're good.

Maxie: Oh, no, no, no. Don't turn this around on me. Because I'm not the one ruining my relationship because of my own insecurity.

Lulu: Okay, if you want to sabotage your friendship with Spinelli by doing something that makes him hate you, be my guest, but don't drag me and Johnny into your drama.

Maxie: That is your justification for being spiteful and petty?

Lulu: Oh, if it was you, it would be ten times worse.

Maxie: You don't get this, do you? These events are important to me, and that appearance with Matt was a disaster. He was embarrassing, and he could have severely damaged everything I'm trying to do for my career.

Lulu: I think it's great that you're ambitious. I wish you all the success in the world. But I don't like you going out on dates with my boyfriend.

Maxie: I can't believe that's what this is about. Lulu, I am not the problem with you and Johnny, and you know it.

Spinelli: It is indeed most pleasurable to do business with you.

Sam: What he means to say is "thank you." I'm going to get the paperwork and bring it over so you can sign it.

Spinelli: And I'm going to begin searching the cyber-realm for those in need of my calling. Jackal, P.I., okay.

Sam: So. Okay, I think Spinelli is pretty excited.

Jason: Yeah.

Sam: And to be honest, so am I.

Jason: That's good. I'm glad for both of you.

Jason: Oh, man. Bernie, thank you.

Bernie: Sure.

Jason: Thank you for doing that.

Bernie: Sure. Probably a terrible idea, but you know, it could be fun, and maybe -- hey, maybe they'll solve a few cases.

Jason: Yeah. Yeah, maybe they will.

Bernie: Listen, this thing you wanted me to look into.

Jason: Michael's shooting?

Bernie: Yeah. I talked to all our contacts. I've come across some new information.

Sonny: I'll find out who's responsible for Michaelís shooting one way or the other.

Ric: Well, not if Jason frames me, Sonny.

Sonny: Why you getting so paranoid?

Ric: Okay, look. Jason has your ear, and for that matter, so does Claudia.

Sonny: So now we're back to Claudia.

Ric: Look, it's no secret she's not happy with me. I wouldn't be surprised if she teamed up with Jason.

Sonny: Claudia might. Jason never would.

Ric: Sonny, you're making a big mistake in trusting Claudia. She's got a lot of secrets.

Sonny: Hey, let me tell you something. Jason has plenty of reasons to hate you, and if thinks you're involved in any way, he'll investigate, but he's not going to frame you. Because that's not what he does.

Ric: I had nothing to do with the shooting. And I'm not going to be made a scapegoat a year after the fact, just because I happened to walk into the warehouse at the wrong time.

Sonny: Let me ask you a question. What the hell were you doing there?

Ric: Because Michaelís my nephew. You know what, the rest of it, you figure out.

Claudia: All I have to do is stall Ric long enough for Sonny to get me pregnant.

Johnny: Claudia, this is wrong on so many levels. Starting with a child you don't want.

Claudia: I don't have a lot of experience with children, but I can adapt.

Johnny: Adapt? You're supposed to love your child.

Claudia: When it's born, I'm sure that I will, John. I'm not that cold-hearted.

Johnny: You're talking about bringing a life into this world to save your own skin. Yeah, I'd say you are.

Claudia: John, think about it. Sonny's not going to kill a pregnant woman, and he's certainly not going to kill one that's carrying his child.

Johnny: Do you hear yourself? You hate the life that we were brought up in. You use it as excuse for all the terrible things that we've done.

Claudia: So what?

Johnny: And now you're talking about bringing a child into the same life, if not worse.

Claudia: You know what? Don't. Do not get all moral on me. I am trying to save our lives here, John.

Johnny: You're on your own. I'm checking out on this one.

Claudia: Johnny, come on. You cannot --    

Ric: I came very close to giving you up to Sonny today.

Claudia: Do you know what, Ric? Don't jerk me around. I'm not in the mood.

Ric: Neither am I, Claudia. It's getting harder and harder to keep quiet.

Claudia: Johnny's about to start working for Sonny and Jason. He'll get the information you need to put them away.

Ric: He'd better work fast.

Claudia: Ric, you threaten me every single time I see you. I got the picture.

Ric: The anniversary of Michaelís shooting is stirring up a lot of emotions, Claudia. Sonny has unanswered questions.

Claudia: And your heart goes out to your brother, I'm sure.

Ric: I'm glad you understand.

Claudia: I understand that you're tightening the screws.

Ric: Claudia, a lot of people are wondering if Devlin worked alone, or if there was somebody else involved. Now here I sit with the truth that you were the one who hired Devlin, hmm? Now, if I told Sonny, that would mean the world to him. So I'm faced with a very interesting choice here. Now, either I can let somebody, probably Jason, uncover the truth and give you up to Sonny, or I can tell him. And then I'm the hero. So which option do you think I should choose?

Spinelli: Maximista, I bring glad tidings.

Maxie: Unless Mattís left town or Lulu's hair has suddenly fallen out, I don't want to hear it.

Spinelli: Well, the Jackal's professional P.I. skills detect that you are somewhat disgruntled. Perhaps my excellent news will spark an upswing in your mood.

Maxie: First, Lulu sabotages my career, and then she leaves me with all of the work. How typical is that?

Spinelli: The Jackal's dream of having a P.I. agency is fast becoming a reality. Fair Samantha and the berneficent one are to be my partners in crime-fighting.

Maxie: That's really great, Spinelli. I'm sure you and Sam will make excellent P.I.'s, but that doesn't help my situation out right now. I mean, Lulu started this, and I have to finish it. You see that, don't you?

Spinelli: I'm not privy to Maximista's convoluted thought processes.

Maxie: I mean, I have to make Lulu pay. Otherwise, it's like I'm sitting here with a sign that says "step on me."

Spinelli: Maximista is most skilled at defending herself. However, it often takes a disastrous turn.

Maxie: Lulu has taken this way too far. Clearly, she doesn't care about our so-called friendship, and if she doesn't, then I don't have to honor it, either.

Spinelli: What exactly has the original blonde one done to provoke your wrath?

Maxie: Lulu is fighting dirty. She's going to get it right back.

Lulu: Hey.

Johnny: Hey. Why did you need to see me?

Lulu: Something happened at work today. Maxie completely overreacted, and I wanted to tell you about it before she had a chance to do something on your next P.R. date.

Johnny: Yeah, Maxie called me, but I missed her call. I was dealing with Claudia.

Lulu: What emergency is it this time?

Johnny: I can't talk about it.

Lulu: Oh, that's right. That's right. You can't tell me. And I'm supposed to be okay with that.

Johnny: Yeah, you are. That's the way it is. And if you don't like it, feel free to bail.

Ethan: I'm wounded by your accusation.

Tracy: You'll get over it.

Ethan: And what do you suspect my agenda might be?

Tracy: The mind reels.

Ethan: All right. I admit it. I intentionally swindle our clientele, and I was well on my way to spreading some of Nickyís wealth in my direction when you chased them off.

Tracy: You'll find another way to line your pockets.

Ethan: I certainly hope so. Because my date with Lulu might be rather expensive.

Tracy: There's always the burger bite on Main.

Ethan: True. And knowing Lulu, she might actually enjoy that. That's what so refreshing about her. She's not interested in fancy cars or designer labels. She's much more real and natural.

Tracy: Okay, tell me something. Why would a man of the world such as yourself be interested in a girl like Lulu?

Ethan: Why wouldn't I be?

Nikolas: And once again, I'm sorry that you've been subjected to Tracyís nonsense.

Rebecca: Stop apologizing. I kind of like mixing it up with Tracy. It's fun. You know, this cancer scare has been making me feel weak and vulnerable, and standing up for myself with Tracy reminded me that I'm strong, and I can fight back. All the same, I was very touched by how you defended me.

Nikolas: That does seem to be a habit of mine, whether you've asked for it or not.

Rebecca: You're a very gallant man.

Nikolas: Is that a compliment, or --

Rebecca: Yeah, it is. A big one. I really appreciate what you said to Tracy and what you didn't say.

Nikolas: What did -- I'm not sure I follow you.

Rebecca: You didn't tell her to back off because, you know, poor Rebecca had a biopsy and is waiting to find out if she has cancer. The last thing I want is your pity.

Nikolas: I certainly don't pity you.

Rebecca: [Laughs]

Nikolas: In fact, I admire you more all the time.

Rebecca: I haven't done much for you to admire. I chickened out on the biopsy until you talked me into it. I was such a nervous wreck, I asked them to sedate me, and the doctor only said I needed a local.

Nikolas: But you still did it anyway, despite your fear.

Rebecca: I didn't really have much of a choice.

Nikolas: Well, sure you did. You could have just stayed up here in your room worrying about the biopsy results instead of going out with me, holding your own against Tracy, a woman who can reduce senators and captains of industry to jelly, by the way.

Rebecca: You're awfully good at pep talks.

Nikolas: Oh, I'm just getting started, really. And you can certainly play a really mean hand of blackjack.

Rebecca: As opposed to you, who lost on purpose.

Nikolas: I -- no, I did no such thing.

Rebecca: Nikolas, admit it. You kept tanking your cards so I could get better hands. It was the only reason I was winning.

Nikolas: No, you were winning because you're a better player than I am.

Rebecca: But you've traveled all over the world, right? And you've been to a lot of casinos.

Nikolas: Yes, but I really have no interest in gambling.

Rebecca: No one is that bad at cards.

Nikolas: Well, I can contest that there is a least one person on this planet that is.

Rebecca: Okay. Well, I'll teach you sometime. At a casino of your choice, of course.

Nikolas: No. I wouldn't want to embarrass you in public or anything like that.

Rebecca: Not a problem. If you embarrass me, I'll just pretend I don't know you.

Nikolas: Well, that wouldn't work.

Rebecca: Yeah? Why not?

Nikolas: Because you're so beautiful. I want everyone in the room to know that I'm the lucky guy you're with.

Spinelli: Perhaps your hostilities with the original blonde one can be resolved in an amicable fashion.

Maxie: No. Lulu and I are way past a friendly conversation. She knew exactly what she was doing, and it's going to boomerang right back around and get her.

Spinelli: That is a most vindictive sentiment.

Maxie: No, really, Spinelli, it'll be like I'm doing her a favor.

Spinelli: By what twisted logic might that be so?

Maxie: Well, Spinelli, Lulu and Johnny aren't exactly good for each other. They spend most of their time arguing and seeing things from opposite points of view. I'm sure if someone intervened and put them out of their misery, Lulu would be grateful.

Spinelli: The Jackal fears Maximista is reverting to her bad blonde ways. Perhaps just a moment of reflection --

Maxie: Oh, no, I'm done reflecting. I'm done fighting my impulses and bending over backwards to protect poor, fragile Lulu.

Spinelli: Dare I ask what impulses?

Maxie: Natural ones. The kind any woman would have under those circumstances. But I resisted, and now Lulu has taken the gloves off. She actually put Matt Hunter into a position to blackmail me into going out with him. I can't just sit here. I have to fight back.

Spinelli: Please, Maximista. I fear that you're going to greatly regret whatever course of action you are contemplating.

Maxie: Spinelli, I won't. Lulu will.

Lulu: I am not bailing, but something has pissed you off, and I want to know what it is.

Johnny: It's this whole situation, Lulu. My sister, she's spiraling out of control, making choices that are destroying her life, and I can't stop her.

Lulu: Stop her from what?

Johnny: It's her private business. I can't betray her trust.

Lulu: What about my trust? We used to talk about everything. Now we barely connect. You're angry all the time. I don't even know why.

Johnny: Lulu, this is not going to work. So why keep trying? Too much has happened, and I can't get past it. I never will.

Lulu: What? What is going on here, huh? Are you -- do you really have a secret with Claudia? Or are you breaking up with me so that you can be with Maxie?

Jason: I got new information on Michaelís shooting.

Sonny: Ric said he saw you at the warehouse, he thinks you're going to frame him.

Jason: You know I hate Ric, okay? I'm not going to frame him or anybody else.

Sonny: That's what I told him. What do you got?

Jason: Something Bernie found. I told him to go over every piece of information we had, and now Bernie can finally validate that Ian Devlin was not acting alone.

Sonny: You found the people who shot Michael?

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