GH Transcript Friday 6/20/08

General Hospital Transcript Friday 6/20/08

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Mac: You can talk to your lawyer when we get down to the station.

Patrick: Come on, Mac. You can't be serious.

Mac: Do you want me to add resisting arrest to the charges?

Robin: What charges? Patrick didn't do anything.

Mac: I'll figure that out when I get to the station.

Robin: I'm supposed to be avoiding stress, remember? Arresting the father of my child for no apparent reason isn't helping me to achieve Zen.

Mac: Trust me, you and the baby will both be better off. Let's go. You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed for you.

Tracy: Go away. When Luke is out of town, it falls on me to supervise his daughter. I have tried reasoning with her. As I have said, she doesn't listen to me. Maybe you can have more of an impact. You have got to convince her to stay away from John Zacchara.

Carly: If I tell her to stay away from Johnny Zacchara, she's only going to want him more. You know that.

Tracy: Carly, Lulu hasn't had much luck in the family boathouse as you may well remember. I cannot do nothing while she gets herself pregnant again. Luke will kill me.

[Cell phone rings]

Maxie: I'm really busy. I have to call you back.

Robin: You have to help me. Uncle Mac has gone completely off the rails.

Claudia: Help me. Let's get him to the couch.

Jason: No. No. I don't -- I don't -- stop. I don't need any help.

Spinelli: With all due respect, Stone Cold, this is not your finest hour. The Jackal fears you have been felled by dreaded Asian ague. So please resist the urge to man up and accept Vixenella's offer of assistance.

Jason: No, I'm fine.

Claudia: Come on, come on, Jason. Look, you can't even stand. You want to sit here on the floor, or do you want to let us help you get to the couch? It's your choice.

Sonny: This has got to be done right. No screw-ups.

Milo: There won't be.

Sonny: Make sure of it.

Milo: Okay.

Max: Uh, boss.

Sonny: Yeah.

Max: This is all kind of sudden, you know, maybe you should take some time to think this over --

Sonny: I know what I'm doing. Max, Max. You go take care of it.

Spinelli: The master must lie down and conserve what's left of his severely sapped strength to fight off the invisible assailant that has worked its way into the very core of your being.

Jason: Okay, I know that you are trying to help me, but I said I'm fine.

Claudia: Okay, get on the phone and call the health department. Find out we're supposed to do. The number is on the back of the quarantine notice. Jason, you are burning up. You're dripping with sweat.

Spinelli: Uh, the Jackal has misplaced the pertinent paperwork that was provided prior to be sealed in the casa de Stone Cold. Oh, gosh, now his master, he's fighting for his life, and the Jackal is trying to correct an error that have been easily avoided by just heeding the white knight's advice and sipping my libation of choice instead of swilling my libation of choice --

Claudia: Okay, okay. Hey, hey, hey. Go -- hey, calm down. Calm down, calm down, okay? Take a deep breath. We're going to retrace your steps, okay? The guy in the Hazmat suit, he came in. He gave the notice to Jason, and then you took it from him and then you --

Spinelli: I retreated to the confines of my regrettably pink room to research the debilitating -- oh, yes, and I left it on the bed.

Claudia: Okay, good, go.

Claudia: Hey, the kid blames himself. You could try cooperating, making it easier on him, you know.

Spinelli: Um, yes, Stone Cold has been struck down the highly contagious super bug and requires immediate assistance before succumbing to the said illness.

Claudia: Nobody's going to die. Hi, sorry about that. What do you need to know? Uh, it's Harbor -- Harbor View penthouse three, Harbor View Towers. We were quarantined last night, and now one of us is sick.

Tracy: The Zaccharas did not think twice about hanging Luke out to dry. What's to say they won't turn on Lulu just as easily?

Carly: Oh, come on, you can't be so naive to think they Luke was actually innocent?

Tracy: No, of course not. But Luke covers his tracks. Any evidence the police have against him, John Zacchara planted, perhaps to give him an unobstructed path to Lulu.

Carly: Okay, you better keep that theory to yourself because it is going to make sound desperate.

Tracy: I am desperate. I care what happens to Lulu.

Carly: Yeah, well, so do I.

Tracy: Well, then, you better do everything in your power to keep her from making the same mistakes you made.

Carly: I have talked to Lulu. I have warned her about the danger and the innocent people that wind up paying the price. It's her choice. Lulu has to walk away on her own. I can't do it for her.

Lulu: Where are you going?

Johnny: I figured we could use some privacy. What's wrong?

Lulu: Um, I think this was maybe -- this was a bad idea. I don't know if I should have brought you here.

Johnny: No, it's fine. It's been fun. I've had a nice time, hearing you laugh, watch you smile. What's going on?

Lulu: Well, it's nothing you did, I just -- when I moved into the Quartermaines, I was in love with Tracyís son -- Dillon. And he was in love with Georgie, but I wanted him for myself, so I convinced him that Georgie was sleeping with somebody else. And I was there to pick up the pieces. This is where it happened. I lost my virginity to him. And, actually, I got pregnant.

Jax: You're a selfish son of a bitch. I can't believe you would take advantage of Alexis like that.

Jerry: I can assure you she was more than willing.

Jax: Oh, that's it. I'm going to kill you.

Alexis: No, no, no, Jax, stop.

[Alexis screams]

Jerry: What Alexis and I do is none of your bloody business. Right, darling?

Jax: Alexis deserves better than you. I'm not going to let you hurt her.

Jerry: I don't intend to.

Jax: You can't help yourself, Jerry. You always push things too far.

Alexis: Jax -- oh, guys, stop it! You're going to get me fired! Stop it! That's it. I'm getting the pepper spray.

Harper: Police! Get up. Get up and get your hands in the air. Get off of him.

Alexis: Put the gun down. They're just having a little -- no, no, no. Don't cuff him. No!

Harper: Come on.

Alexis: Thank God.

Jax: I'm real sorry about that, Jerry.

Alexis: No, Jax Ė

Harper: You are both under arrest for disorderly conduct.

Alexis: Thanks for stopping by.

Sonny: It's me. You almost done?

Kate: Yes, the shoot finally wrapped. I'm going to go to my office and look at some proofs, and then I'm all yours.

Max: Hmm. Ooh. Oh, wow.

Diane: Hi.

[Max chuckles]

Diane: What have you got there?

Max: Oh, Ms. Miller, I didn't even here you come in.

Diane: Clearly, you were too focused on whatever it is you're desperately clutching behind your back.

Max: Huh.

Diane: It's too late to hide it, Max. You might as well just show me.

Max: I can't, it's a surprise.

Diane: A surprise? Have I ever told you how much I adore surprises? Especially when they are given to my by big, handsome, flexible men.

[Diane laughs]

Diane: Do I at least get a hint?

Max: Well, it wouldnít do you any good.

Diane: Try me.

Max: Trust me on this. You're never going to guess.

Diane: Well, now my interest is effectively piqued. Oh, come on, Max, how much longer are you going to make me wait? You're going to show it to me sooner or later, why not make it now? Oops.

Max: Oh.

[Diane gasps]

[Diane stammers]

Diane: Well, this is -- this is unexpected to say the least. My God, that's big.

Max: Um, five carats.

Diane: Five? Really?

Max: Yeah, nothing but the best, you know.

Diane: You sweet, wonderful man. How could any girl say no?

[Diane giggles]

Max: I'm not, um --

Diane: Not what?

Max: Um, saying this very well. I, uh --

Diane: Oh, you're saying it beautifully. There's nothing more to say. Of course, I will marry you. Look.

Claudia: He is about 6'1", 185 pounds of pure muscle with the bluest eyes I've ever seen in my entire life. They're deep blue, like, I don't know. They're really almost like an indigo blue. Oh, what do you need to know? Physical condition is incredible. Seriously, the guy must spend hours in the gym to get his body to look like that. He's insanely ripped. I haven't seen his abs yet, but if they're anything like his biceps, oh, my God. Any recent injuries or illness?

Jason: No, I said I'm fine. Just hang up the phone. Hang up the phone.

Spinelli: Although Stone Cold does appear to be a prime physical specimen, you know, when not suffering the ill effects of Asian ague -- actually, he nearly severed tendons in both of his hands performing a daring act of heroism and it required three corrective surgeries to regain function.

Claudia: He's had three surgeries on his hands, but they look fine now. Any other recent injures or illnesses?

Spinelli: Well, Stone Cold has cheated death on several occasions after being shot by evildoers seeking to do harm to Mr. Sir and the fair Samantha.

Claudia: Okay, anything near the lungs?

Jason: No, not recently.

Claudia: He was fine a couple of minutes ago, and now he can't stand.

Jason: No, I can --

Claudia: What's his temperature? Can you get a thermometer?

Spinelli: The Jackal procured one when he was upstairs in the regrettably pink room. Just hold still for me.

Jason: What are you -- ow! What are you doing?

Spinelli: No -- it needs to happen, shh.

Jason: Get that thing away.

Sonny: What the hell were you thinking, giving Kateís ring to Diane?

Max: I'm sorry, boss.

Sonny: I'm sorry? A five-carat diamond. Do you know how much it cost me, Max?

Max: Ms. Miller walked in. She saw the ring. She assumed it was for her. What was I supposed to do?

Sonny: Not propose.

Max: I didnít. Ms. Miller said yes without me even asking her.

Sonny: Max, you know what? I don't care how it happened. You want to marry Diane, get your own ring. I want mine back.

Max: That's just it; I don't want to marry Diane.

Sonny: Oh.

Max: Not that she isn't great. She's beyond great. She's sexy and smart and wonderful. But marriage is a huge commitment, you know, at least for me.

Sonny: What does that mean? Are you -- are you saying that I'm not ready to make a commitment to Kate?

Max: No, no, no, boss. I'm just saying that your track record, you know, with marriage isn't the greatest. Um, you know, you and Mrs. C have been married -- what, four times? And you still couldn't get it to work. So, what makes you think it's going to be different with Kate?

Sonny: Well, it's a whole different situation now. Okay? I am out of the business, and you know what? Kate's not going to have to deal with the danger, and the -- you know, violence that Carly did. Right?

Max: Yeah.

Sonny: I'm going to do -- I'm going to do it right, for once. I'm going to give Kate a good life, but first, I need the damn ring.

Max: Mm-hmm.

Alexis: I don't care what Detective Harper says. I do not want Mr. Jacks processed. Either of them, Jasper or Jerry. No charges filed. It was a total misunderstanding.

Diane: I'm engaged.

Alexis: What?

Diane: You heard me. Drinks, Metro Court, right now.

Alexis: Wait. To whom?

Diane: What do you mean, to whom? Max.

Alexis: You want to marry Max?

Diane: Don't be absurd. Marriage is nothing more than a trap which leeches away your independence and forces you to make compromises no woman in her right mind would even stoop to consider. Like shared closet space. The very idea of cramming all of my beautiful couture into a shared walk-in just makes my skin crawl. Besides, Max and I have such a wonderful thing going. Why would I want to ruin it by getting married?

Alexis: Then why did you say yes?

Diane: How could -- how could I say no? Have you seen this cocktail ring?

Alexis: Oh, good grief!

Diane: This has to have set Max back at least ten years' salary. Alexis that's got to be what -- four carats?

Diane: Five.

Alexis: Fantastic.

Diane: I know. Alexis which is why you have to give it back.

Diane: No.

Harper: Okay, who wants to tell me what happened?

Jerry: Oh, I will, I will. My brother was being totally childish as usual and totally out of line and ridiculously possessive, about a woman who --

Jax: I'm -- I'm the one that's being childish.

Jerry: Yes,

Jax: That's really funny. Let me tell you something, Jerry.

Jerry: Please.

Jax: Alexis is a very good friend of mine. And you know that. I still can't believe that you would do that to her.

Jerry: I thought you'd be happy if I kept it in the family.

Jax: I'm not going to sit here passively while you charm Alexis in your sleazy ways, and then just vanish, leaving her to wonder what she did wrong. Because that's exactly what's going to happen.

Jerry: If you'd bothered consummating your sham of a marriage, you'd find out that Alexis has many talents and does everything right, several times.

Harper: Okay, okay, calm down.

Jerry: Everywhere. We do it everywhere.

Harper: Knock it off.

Patrick: You can't arrest me, Mac. I haven't done anything.

Mac: I can hold you for 48 hours on suspicion of stalking.

Patrick: I'm not stalking Robin.

Mac: Oh, no? What do you call lurking around a woman's apartment when you have no legal ties to her whatsoever?

Robin: Uncle Mac, you have gone too far this time. This has got to stop.

Lulu: My parents, they had this incredible, once in a lifetime kind of love. I mean, you could see it when they looked at each other, and I just -- I wanted to know what that felt like. You know, to be loved so intensely that it filled your whole heart. So I tricked Dillon into sleeping with me. I mean, talk about selfish. I blew Dillonís entire life apart, knowing full well that he was in love with somebody else.

Johnny: Look, it's understandable. You got caught up. Okay? Your whole life you've been taught about love and what it can do, how it changes people, makes people happier. Why wouldn't you want it for yourself?

Lulu: Have you wanted something that badly?

Johnny: I never wanted to fall in love. I mean, I saw what love can do, what it did to my father, and how he loved my mother to the point of obsession, you know? After she died, I guess I made a subconscious choice not to feel, I don't know, to stay numb inside so nothing could affect me. And it worked. Until the night I picked you up. That all changed.

Lulu: Oh!

[Tracy coughing]

Claudia: It's 102. Okay, if it goes over 104, we need to call an ambulance, get him straight to the hospital. Anything else that I can do to make him feel more comfortable in the meantime? Uh, okay, if that's what you think is best. I will definitely try to find a way to make that happen. What else? Acetaminophen, lots of fluids, okay. Yep, got it. Thank you so much for your help. Okay.

Jason: Find a way to make what happen?

Claudia: Take care of you. Me and Spinelli are bending over backwards here trying to make you more comfortable. The least you could do is just -- just show a little gratitude. Being sick is bringing out the worst aspect of your personality, which I didn't think was possible.

Spinelli: Fear not, Stone Cold. The Jackal will have you back on your feet in no time. Here, drink this.

Jason: What is this?

Spinelli: It's a blend of 19 fruits, including a rare Brazilian berry guaranteed to restore you to optimum health.

Claudia: He's been exposed to a highly contagious illness. I really don't think that a Brazilian berry is going to make him better.

Max: It's too late, boss. I just -- I can't ask for it back.

Sonny: The hell it is. It's my ring, and you had no business giving it to Diane or anyone else.

Max: You should have seen the look on Ms. Miller's face. If I ask for it back, it's just going to crush her. I can't hurt her like that.

Sonny: Well, you can't marry her either.

Max: Why not?                                                                                                                                                             

Sonny: Do you love Diane?

Max: She's an incredible woman.

Sonny: That's not what I asked. Are you in love with Diane?

Max: No, but you know.

Sonny: No, but -- that's not the answer. You only marry a woman if you love them.

Max: Boss, isn't that a little hypocritical, given that you've married Mrs. C twice to stay out of prison?

Sonny: That's different. Carly and I, you know, she -- there was always love there. But we got to a point where we were going to kill each other, so we had to let it go.

Max: Do you miss her?

Sonny: No. But you know what? She's moved on. I've moved on. Carly's happy, I'm happy.

Max: Which is exactly why I can't ask for the ring back. Ms. Miller's happiness is too important.

Sonny: Oh, come on, Max. You guys are only having this ridiculous affair because I'm telling you you canít.

Max: That's not true.

Sonny: That's not true. Tell me it's --

Max: That's not true, okay?

Sonny: Right.

Max: Look, I've never met anyone like Ms. Miller before. All right, she's funny, she's unbelievably smart, and for whatever reason, she wants to marry me. If I had to make a commitment, it would be to her.

Sonny: Not with my ring.

Alexis: You are a confident, independent career woman, and no matter how much we are both very impressed with this ring, you don't need it to feel validated.

Diane: But it's so pretty.

Alexis: Focus. Eyes on me.

Diane: I'm right here.

Alexis: Marriage to Max Giamgotti.

Diane: Giambetti.

Alexis: Giamgetti -- is a bad idea on very many levels.

Diane: I thought we just agreed to stop criticizing each other on our choice of bad-boy bed toys.

Alexis: We did. We pinky-sweared on it. But we were talking about sleeping with them. We weren't talking about marrying them. And to marry a career felon with two left feet is not a good idea.

Diane: You're wrong. Max does not have two left feet. He can be very agile when the situation warrants.

Alexis: All right, I'm sorry. I apologize. I didn't mean that. Look, even if he weren't a minion to a thug, and you were madly in love with him, and you want to spend the rest of your life with him, I would still advise you to proceed with caution because marriage is a very serious thing. You need to think about it before you take that step. I wish someone had advised me that when I married Ric.

Diane: Now you're just being insulting. Max is nothing like Ric. Max is incredibly sweet, endlessly supportive, and amazing in bed.

Alexis: I never said that Ric wasn't --

Diane: And may I just remind you of the care -- the wonderful care he took of me when we went away for that weekend? He makes waffles, you know, Belgian, strawberries, whipped cream, sprig of mint.

Alexis: Focus. Do you, Diane Miller, attorney at law, really want to be Mrs. Max Giamgotti?

Diane: Betti.

Alexis: Whatever.

Diane: No. No, of course not. I don't want to be Mrs. Anyone.

Alexis: Then tell poor Max, for God's sake, before the credit people come after him.

Robin: Patrick is the father of my baby and has every right to be in my apartment.

Mac: If Patrick was any kind of father, he would put the baby's needs above his own, instead of hitting you up for sex every chance he gets.

Maxie: If Patrick and Robin want to have sex in every corner of her apartment, they are allowed. Because she's an adult and so am I. And I'm pretty sure you're not allowed to go around arresting everyone that we sleep with.

Mac: I'm not going to apologize for trying to protect you girls. Robin, I know how important this baby is to you, to all of us. I couldn't stand it if anything happened.

Robin: Okay, then instead of dwelling on all the horrible things that could happen during my pregnancy, why don't we try to focus on the positive, the fact that I am carrying a life inside of me, a life that Patrick helped create. So, instead of coming up with reasons to drive him away, why don't we just be grateful that he wants to be a part of this child's life?

Patrick: Nothing is more important to me than Robin and the baby, Mac. I would never do anything to hurt them.

Robin: Listen, I know that you love me. But Patrick does, too. So, what do you say? Let him come home with me and the baby, please.

[Mac sighs]

Mac: All right, you're free to go.

Patrick: Thank you.

Mac: I'm not doing it for you.

Jerry: Are you going to make us sit here all night? Could we have some tea or whiskey?

Harper: Be grateful you're not down in lock-up.

Jax: Oh, I would love to be down in lock-up with him. Give me five minutes with him. Give him the beating that he deserves

Jerry: Oh, by all means, lock us up together; I can't wait for the chance to shut my little brother up.

Jax: You couldn't beat me.

Harper: All right, all right. Hey, here's an idea, why don't you both shut up?

Kate: Excuse me. I got a call that Jasper Jacks had been arrested.

Desk sergeant: Yeah, are you here to bail him out?

Carly: Well, if anyone's going to bail out my husband, it's me.

Carly: You can go, Kate.

Kate: Are you all right, Jax?

Jax: Yeah, I'm fine. Thanks for coming down. I know you had better things to do this afternoon than to bail me out of this ridiculous situation.

Jerry: What's ridiculous is that I got arrested when you threw the first punch.

Jax: Well that's what happens when you cross the line, Jerry.

Jerry: Oh, does your wife know how territorial you are? Whoo-hoo-hoo.

Jax: Leave Carly out of this, okay?

Harper: I told you both to shut up. Are you here to post bail?

Carly and Kate: Yes.

Harper: I'll start the paperwork.

Carly: Kate.

Kate: Well, it appears that Carly has everything under control, and I'm needed somewhere else. So, if you are really okay?

Jax: Yeah, I'm fine.

Carly: He's fine. He's great, thanks.

Jax: Thank you. I'll see you at the office. I'm fine. Bye.

Kate: Bye.

Carly: What are they charging you with?

Jerry: Attacking me without provocation.

Jax: What? I may have thrown the first punch, Jerry, but it was well deserved now, wasn't it?

Jerry: Oh, really?

Jax: Yes. You don't think so?

Jerry: No, I donít.

Carly: What did you do?

Jerry: Well, I finally persuaded the lovely and enchanting Alexis to --

Alexis: There's no need to go into the details. Charges are being dropped. You are both free to go. So, go.

Maxie: Do you need anything else?

Robin: I think Patrick can take it from here. But thank you so much for dropping everything and dropping me off at the station.

Maxie: Please, when Mac's not butting into your sex life, he's usually policing mine. So, I think it's about time we formed a unified front and set some boundaries.

Patrick: Well, let's just hope he respects them.

Maxie: All you need to do is not hurt Robin, then you'll be fine.

Robin: Now you sound like him.

Maxie: He has every right to be worried. You're having a baby with a guy who has practically slept with the entire hospital.

Patrick: Operative word being slept, as in past tense, Maxie. I'm committed to Robin now.

Maxie: Oh, that's good, because the worst thing you could do to Robin or this baby is make promises that you can't keep. Call me.

Robin: Thank you.

Tracy: I am not going to stand by and watch you literally get into bed with the mob. You're not going to make the same mistakes I made.

Alan: You keep this up much longer, and they are going to elope. And then you are going to wind up with John Zacchara as your son-in-law.

Tracy: Step son-in-law.

Johnny: Her brother's back, isn't he?

Lulu: Yeah. Alan only seems to show up when Tracy is having a crisis of conscious. He must think she is being ridiculous.

Tracy: Do you think I can't hear you?

Lulu: Look, we listened to what you had to say. But what Johnny and I do is our business.

Tracy: Lulu, I'm perfectly willing to back off, if you can promise me she is in no danger because of you.

Jason: Mmm.

Spinelli: For centuries, people in this particular region of Brazil have prized this particular berry fruit as a source of vitality and health. By Stone Cold drinking this blend, he is not only getting the antioxidants and vital nutrients he needs to maintain a healthy lifestyle, he's is also receiving the daily recommended servings of fruit and vegetables in a single glass.

Claudia: Uh, I'm sorry, but I don't think that your Brazilian berry is any match for the Asian ague. If it was, Jason would be looking a lot better than he is right now.

Jason: Ahh. More.

Claudia: Hey, you can't honestly believe that that juice is going to bring your fever down.

Jason: Hey, he's trying to help. Okay, the least you can do is just be quiet and let him think it is working.

[Crash]

[Spinelli groans]

Jason: What happened?

Spinelli: The Jackal has spilt the last of the life-saving elixir.

Sonny: Max, Kateís coming over for dinner. I expect that ring in my hand by the time she gets here.

Max: What if she just doesn't want to give it back?

Sonny: I don't care. I'm proposing to Kate tonight.

Max: Can't you wait a couple of days, and just give me some time to explain this to Ms. Miller?

Sonny: There's nothing to explain. You didn't buy the ring. You don't want to marry her.

Jax: How do I say this to Ms. Miller?

Sonny: Just say it the way -- like I just said it to you right now.

Max: Right. Okay. You know what? I'll just call her, and I'll tell her what happened.

Sonny: Okay.

Max: She's got a great sense of humor.

Sonny: Right.

Max: I'm sure she is going to laugh about the whole thing.

Sonny: Yeah, fantastic.

Max: You know? Diane, uh, Ms. Miller. Diane, you know that whole ring thing? Um -- ugh.

Sonny: Just call her. Dial -- oh, look. Perfect timing. He's got something to say to you.

Diane: Oh. Well, do you mind if I go first? Because if I don't say this now, I just might lose my nerve.

Max: Please.

Diane: Have been doing a lot of thinking. And while I care for you, deeply-

Max: Likewise Ms. Miller.

Diane: Thank you, Max. You are a wonderful man. In fact, in truth, I couldn't think of a better life partner, someone to share my life with.

Sonny: Max.

Max: That's kind of what I need to talk to you about. You know, I never thought I would meet a woman like you. You truly are the entire package. Looks, brains, and those legs -- God, those legs.

Sonny: Just say it.

Diane and Max: I can't marry you.

Patrick: Why is there a bunch of swatches in the closet?

Robin: It's not a closet. It's a dressing area that's about to become a nursery.

Patrick: You want to put the baby in there?

Robin: Listen, I already had this argument with my mother and with Maxie. So I am not about to have it with you.

Patrick: I am not arguing.

Robin: Good, because I am supposed to be avoiding stress, remember?

Patrick: Okay, well, what's more stressful than trying to cram a crib into a closet?

Robin: Dressing area.

Patrick: Whatever, it's not going to fit.

Robin: It is going to fit, because I just measured and there's two inches to spare.

Patrick: Two inches, Robin?

Robin: Yes, more than enough.

Patrick: Okay, you know what, that's crazy. Why don't you just move in with me? There's plenty of room for the three of us, and four if we want to get a nanny.

Robin: We?

Patrick: Yeah, you, me -- we're a family now. And I want us to live together when the baby is born.

Harper: You're letting them walk?

Alexis: It was a simple misunderstanding.

Harper: They got into a brawl and tore apart the office of a public official. That's at least a misdemeanor, if not a felony.

Alexis: But it was my office, and I am dropping the charges. So, where are the keys?

Carly: They are fighting over you?

Alexis: It wasn't a fight. It was, you know, brothers letting off a little steam.

Jax: I was protecting Alexis.

Carly: From what?

Jerry: From me.

Alexis: No need to discuss that right now.

Jerry: Why not? Why not? I've got nothing to hide, darling.

Alexis: Yeah, I do. So, it would be really inappropriate for you bringing up the intimate details in a place where I'm working.

Jerry: I'm certainly not ashamed that we are sleeping together. I mean, if Jax has a problem --

Carly: You two had sex? That's what this is about?

Johnny: I never lied to Lulu about who I am. She knows the life I lead is dangerous and made the choice to be with me anyway. Let's go.

Alan: Well, gossip obviously didn't work. What else you got?

Tracy: Couldn't you just please go away?

Alan: You know the guy obviously has some backbone. Lulu could definitely do worse.

Tracy: I don't remember you being quite so resigned when Emily ran off with Zander Smith, a known felon, or when Jason ran off to do Sonny's bidding.

Alan: My heart broke for my kids. And I handled it all wrong, just like you are now. But you said your peace, Tracy. Maybe it will have some impact. Just let them think about it for a while.

Tracy: Okay.

Lulu: Bye, Tracy.

Spinelli: While the Jackal may have learned at the feet of the master, it is clear he is incapable of using any of the important knowledge in any sort of practical application. Sadly, when put to the test, your grasshopper continues to fail, be it as the Jackal or as an Aussie in training. You know what? Case in point. Had Damian limited his libations, the Jackal would not have needed sustenance to sober up. Thereby, not exposing Stone Cold to an airborne illness which the Brazilian berry, no doubt, would have remedied, had it ended up in your body not on my shirt.

Jason: Stop, stop, it's okay. I actually feel -- I'm feeling better.

Spinelli: Your slumped posture would imply otherwise.

Jason: I just -- I need some rest. I'll be okay by tomorrow.

Spinelli: But now with Stone Cold assuming the reins of the Corinthos crime empire, what if a crisis is to occur during your convalescence? This is obviously a conversation that should not be had within earshot of Vixenella. I -- the Jackal apologizes for indiscretion.

Jason: Hey, hey, it's -- it's all right.

Spinelli: Perhaps the Jackal should refrain from offering assistance in the future. Any further attempts, no matter how well-meaning, could prove lethal.

Claudia: Spinelli, nobody's going to die. All we have to do -- we just have -- we have to find a way to bring down Jason's fever. Do you think you could get on the intern and do a little research for me?

Spinelli: Yeah. Yeah, no, um -- the Jackal shall scour cyberspace looking for a remedy to Stone Cold's ailment. Hmm.

Jason: That was good the way you calmed him down. He needs to be focused on something.

Claudia: Did you actually just thank me?

Diane: You don't want to get married?

Max: It's not that I don't hold you in the highest esteem, 'cause --

Diane: Then why did you buy a ring?

Sonny: He didn't, I did.

Diane: You bought me an engagement ring?

Sonny: Not for you, Diane. For Kate. Where's the ring?

Diane: Oh. Oh, well, thank heavens. She'll love it.

Sonny: Thank you. Give me the box.

Max: You're not disappointed?

[Diane chuckles]

Diane: It's a gorgeous ring. And you are a wonderful man. But marriage? Out of the question -- I couldn't even think about giving up my independence that way.

Sonny: Who says you have to, Diane?

Diane: Maybe if I were in my 20s, and I could build a life with somebody, things might be different. But women who have achieved success and then fall in love, they will twist themselves into pretzels to make a marriage work because, God forbid, we overachievers should ever fail at anything. And then we only become clingy, insecure shadows of the women we once were. Who needs that? Right? Why not have an adult relationship rather than risk the pitfalls of marriage?

Kate: Who's getting married?

Diane: Um, Sonny has convinced himself that my relationship with Max is simply an act of defiance. Which is not only narcissistic -- big surprise -- but is patently untrue. And I was simply saying to Sonny that if Max and I ever do decide to get married, hypothetically speaking, it will have nothing to do with Sonny and everything to do with the mind-bending, earthshaking sex we are having. Speaking of which -- yes? Okay.

Max: Please.

Diane: Let's go. Excuse us.

Kate: Have fun.

Max: Oh, we will.

[Kate laughs]

Sonny: How you doing?

Kate: Good.

Sonny: Uh -- I was going to have everything -- dinner and everything ready for you, and then I had to deal with that nonsense.

Kate: Oh, please, they're sweet. I think that relationship has softened Diane.

Sonny: You make it sound like a good thing.

Kate: And why wouldn't it be?

Sonny: Does a career woman really want to take on a relationship?

Kate: Oh, well, I suppose it depends on the woman.

Sonny: What if you were the woman and I was the one asking?

Kate: Asking what?

Alexis: My personal life is -- well, personal. So, if you could refrain from discussing this in the middle of the squad room where I am the district attorney and I am working with all these people. Stop it.

Jax: You okay? You okay? What's the matter?

Carly: Oh, my goodness. This is awesome. I mean, you guys are perfect for each other, really.

[Laughs]

Patrick: Okay, I know you like this place. But let's face it. Mine has more room for us.

Robin: For us -- you, me, and the baby?

Patrick: Yeah, well, I can't imagine the kid's going to move out anytime soon, so, yeah.

Robin: Maybe these pills that Kelly gave me have hallucinogenics in it or something, because I could have just sworn that you said you wanted me to move in with you.

Patrick: Come on, Robin. There's a whole second bedroom. That's a nursery just waiting to happen.

Robin: You, me, and the baby makes three. That's funny.

Johnny: I can't blame your stepmother for being worried about you, anymore than I can argue with what she said.

Lulu: To us or her dead brother?

Johnny: Okay, the point is she was right. There are no guarantees you'll be safe.

Lulu: There are no guarantees period. I could get hit by a bus tomorrow crossing the street.

Johnny: Or you could get hit by a bullet by standing next to me.

Lulu: What happened to Michael was an accident. The bullet ricocheted.

Johnny: Only you can decide if you want to take that risk.

Lulu: I have made my decision.

Johnny: Okay, then I'm done trying to change your mind.

Lulu: Good, because I am not going to let anything come between us again.

[Maxie sighs]

Maxie: What a perfect day for a swim. I guess we all have the same idea?

Jason: What are you doing?

Claudia: the lady from the health department said a sponge bath might help. Sit up.

Jason: No, no, no. Get away from me.

Claudia: Sit up so I can take your clothes off.

>> On the next "General Hospital" --

Maxie: Would you mind?

Patrick: You're not even giving us a chance to be a family.

Sonny: You know how much I love you, right?

Anthony: Kill Jason.

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