GH Transcript Wednesday 9/13/06

General Hospital Transcript Wednesday 9/13/06


Provided By Boo
Proofread by Amelia

Carly: I realize those orders came from Mr. Jacks, Paul, but I run this hotel and I would appreciate it if the staff listened to me. Hold on, please. Carly Corinthos. Hi! Yeah! How's it going out there in Albany? What? Under whose authority? I already told you we are not selling the hotel -- that's why it's our new hotel?

Jax: And now it's somebody else's new hotel. You'll be happy when you see the details.

Carly: Can I call you back? Thanks. You ignored my wishes -- make that my passionate conviction -- and you sold my gorgeous hotel in Albany?

Jax: I did, yes, because it will make us richer than we already are.

Carly: One slow dance, and suddenly we're an "us"?

Alexis: What happened at the cocktail party last night? What did Ric do to Sonny to provoke this sudden display of brotherly love?

Sam: Uh -- you know, there were some people there. There were a lot of drinks and music and politicking, and -- I mean, if -- if something went -- went on between Sonny and Ric, I -- I certainly didn't see it.

Alexis: Ric has no idea why Sonny chose to provoke him like that. Do you know why?

Sonny: You're late, Ric.

Ric: Yes, well, I've been busy all morning doing damage control after the little show you put on last night.

Sonny: Yeah, I read that when I was having coffee this morning. You know, the -- it's -- in photographs, the family resemblance is spectacular.

Ric: That's cute. What were you trying to prove, Sonny?

Sonny: That blood's thicker than water.

Ric: You know, you couldn't have made me look any worse than if you had handed me a whole briefcase full of cash with the cameras rolling.

Sonny: Good idea. Maybe I'll do that next time.

Ric: All right, fine, what do you want?

Sonny: Okay, I've already said it, you know, enough. Stay away from Sam.

Ric: Well, you're going to have to take that up with Alexis, because that was her idea.

Georgie: Hey. Hi -- hi.

Dillon: Oh. Hi.

Georgie: What are you doing?

[Dillon sighs]

Dillon: I -- the gardener's been threatening to clean this junk up for months -- since, like, May -- and he hasn't, so I got tired of waiting.

Georgie: Dillon, you honestly think if someone had cleaned the junk up with the cushions and the -- and the blankets and stuff, that you wouldn't have slept with Lulu? You know what? I'm sorry, it's not even worth speaking about. The fact is it happened, and she's pregnant.

Dillon: Yeah, well, not for long.

Georgie: She decided to have an abortion?

Dillon: Yes, she did. And according to her, it's her choice, and I don't even get a vote.

Carly: This is nice. You come back to Port Charles, offer me your heart, and to prove you're genuine, you sell my hotel out from under me.

Jax: Well, our hotel is not stolen yet. We're still working out --

Carly: You said they already accepted the offer.

Jax: Well, we're still working out the details, but I'm sure you'll be very happy. Look, I'm sure it'll work out.

Carly: You better hope it doesn't work out.

Jax: Well, I'm still going to need your signature on the paperwork. What is this, emotional blackmail?

Carly: I'm just thinking about our partnership -- on many levels.

Jax: Really?

Carly: Mm-hmm.

Jax: How many levels do we have?

Carly: At the moment, not as many as you'd like.

Jax: Oh. Then why would I bother?

Carly: Because it's a beautiful hotel in a great location, and you know it was a good move.

Jax: Yeah, it was a great move. I was able to make a lot of money with it, okay? That's what I do. I buy low and I sell high -- that's how I got to be where I am today.

Carly: Well, there's always room for improvement. So why don't you let me open your mind, okay, reshape your way of thinking?

Jax: How do you plan to do that?

Carly: Well, I could tell you over dinner.

Jax: Do you want me to make a reservation, because I know the owner, she's really cute.

Carly: We don't need reservations -- we won't have any distractions at my house -- and when I'm done with you, you won't be able to refuse me.

Sonny: You're taking advantage of your wife's illness, Ric.

Ric: Oh, those are your words, not mine.

Sonny: Alexis is afraid of dying. You know, she -- she's not thinking straight.

Ric: It's interesting that you would judge her that way.

Sonny: All she cares about is that Molly and Kristina grow up together, and for whatever reason, she wants them to be with you. She also wants Sam to be in their lives, so you know what? You guys can go ahead and keep this charade and convince her that you guys get along if you want. You go ahead and do that.

Ric: There's nothing wrong with that.

Sonny: You know what -- except you're using Alexis' illness to manipulate Sam.

Ric: Oh, why, because Sam tells you that? Nothing's further from the truth.

Sonny: You know, it always amuses me when you spit out the truth.

Ric: You know, Sam must've misunderstood, Sonny, because all I've done is extend a hand in friendship to her, that's all. I want to keep the peace for Alexis' sake.

Sonny: Okay, that's one scenario, but here's another one. The woman Jason loves is -- is in a situation that she can't avoid. And she hates your guts; she has to live every day of her life in shame because she let herself sleep with you one dark, drunken night -- oh, oh, for you, it's a great opportunity, your sweet setup for revenge.

Ric: You know what? You really should avoid conspiracy theories, Sonny -- people might think you forgot to take your meds.

Sonny: All that matters is you never compromise Sam again. And from now on, unless Alexis is in the room, you stay the hell away from her.

Alexis: This is unbelievable. I asked him if he could just be supportive for one night. One night -- I don't think that's too much to ask, do you? I can't seem to get --

[Alexis coughs]

Sam: I'll get help --

Alexis: I'm okay!

Sam: No, you're not.

Alexis: I'm all right. The oncologist is going to be here. I need you to do me a favor. Sonny has made a bad situation even worse, and since I'm not able to do anything about it, I need you to try to mend --

[Alexis coughs]

Alexis: Fences with them -- Ric and Sonny.

Sam: No, no, no, no, forget Ric. Stop worrying about everyone else, just concentrate on you getting better, please.

Alexis: I'm trying, but I can't really get anyone to cooperate, now, can I? You listen to me, I am not okay, and I need Kristina and Molly to have stability, and you and Ric and Sonny are the most I have to offer them. So, damn it, I need you all to get along.

Dillon: I should've known that this would happen when Luke showed up.

Georgie: Wait -- you think he pressured Lulu to have the abortion?

Dillon: Well, she would do anything for her father's approval. I mean, what do you think? He barely is pulling his weight as a dad. I'm sure he doesn't want to walk around being called "Grandpa".

Georgie: I know that Lulu worships Luke, and I don't often defend anything he does, but cannot see him pressuring her into that.

Dillon: Well, you know what? She was ready to sign custody over to me until he showed up. Now she's completely changed her mind. You do the math.

Georgie: Dillon, maybe she wasn't completely thrilled with Edward's idea of you having custody just so you could hand the baby over to him and his family.

Dillon: Well, you know what they say, Georgie -- "It takes a village."

Georgie: Or an asylum, Dillon. Listen, I'm really sorry, but let's look at the facts here. People have gone to great lengths to keep kids away from your family. They've lied, cheated, committed crimes -- look at what Lois did to keep Brook Lynn away from the Quartermaines.

Dillon: I know, I know, but it wouldn't be that long. As soon as I graduate and I get myself established, I'd take the kid far away from there. How -- how hard can it be to be a single dad? Give me that.

Georgie: Really, really hard, Dillon.

Dillon: You know, I -- I thought I wanted to be a father. I mean, when Lulu told me about the abortion, I raved and yelled and I went ballistic and I called her selfish and some other things -- and it's hypocritical. You know, it really is hypocritical, because the more I think about how I feel about her decision, I'm relieved.

Sam: Jason, it's me. Um -- I just wanted to let you know that it was really nice hearing your voice -- even though it was only in a message -- and I guess that's it. Just be safe, and I'll -- talk to you soon bye. Hey.

Nikolas: Sorry if I kept you waiting.

Sam: No, please. Thanks for coming.

Nikolas: Let's get a table.

Sam: Okay.

Nikolas: Thank you. So what's going on?

Sam: Okay. Um -- you know how stressed Alexis is about what'll happen to Kristina and Molly if she dies.

Nikolas: Yeah, well, she wants them -- she wants them to stay together. I don't blame her for that.

Sam: No, exactly. She's already said that she wants Ric to raise them with me as their maternal influence.

Nikolas: Right. Well, the way Alexis grew up, some version of a nuclear family I'm sure is important to her.

Sam: Nikolas, it's a horrible arrangement. I cannot stand Ric, and I know, I am sure -- I know, I know the feeling is mutual, and I just --

Nikolas: It's just -- well, the two of you are just trying to help her get through cancer, right?

Sam: No, it -- it's more than Ric and I not getting along, okay? He -- he's a horrible choice for Kristina. I can't speak for Molly, but Kristina cannot be with Ric.

Nikolas: Kristina adores Ric, and -- and he appears to be a loving stepfather.

Sam: "Appears." I mean, this is as long as Alexis is around to keep her eye on him. Okay, look, you know Ric. He's got this love-hate relationship with Sonny. It is stronger than any affection he feels for Kristina. If he gets custody of her, he will use her against Sonny, and this -- this is a volatile situation for everyone involved.

Nikolas: Well, have you spoke to Alexis about this?

Sam: Come on. She's too sick for that. I can't do that.

Nikolas: You know --

Sam: I just want my sisters to be provided for, and I know it is asking a lot, but I was thinking that maybe you could ask Alexis if she could appoint you guardian of the girls. Before you answer, just please think about it, please? Because trusting Ric is not the answer.

Ric: You know, it's always fascinating to hear the world according to Sonny. Did it ever occur to you that if there was trouble, that maybe it was coming from Sam?

Sonny: Sam has no reason to make trouble.

Ric: No, wait a minute. You just said it yourself -- shame, guilt. She was so angry at Alexis -- and Jason, for that matter -- that maybe she slept with me to get back at both of them. Because I found it very interesting that after we were done sleeping together, that she made it all about my agenda. Then we found out that Alexis was diagnosed with lung cancer. Rather than take responsibility for it, she decides to demonize me, because it's much easier, Sonny, to rewrite history and make me out to be the villain than own her part in it.

Sonny: You can spin it any which way you want -- up, down. Sam never tried to justify what happened between you.

Ric: Oh, right.

Sonny: She -- hey, she admitted she was drunk, she was upset, she could've said no, but she didn't. You both are to blame for this stupid situation. The one thing I can say is she's done everything to avoid you. She even wanted to leave town so -- the thing -- listen to me. What Sam wants to do is make it right for Kristina, Molly, and Alexis. It does not give you the invitation to harass her.

Ric: Okay, it wasn't my idea to take her to the cocktail party. That was Alexis, okay? I'm just trying to make sure things don't get worse.

Sonny: Next time Alexis suggests you spend any time with Sam, what you need to do is make up an excuse why you can't. You're good at excuses. You've -- you've made them into an art form.

Ric: So you're determined to blame me for this, right?

[Sonny sighs]

Ric: Hmm?

Sonny: What I'm -- all I'm saying is if -- if Sam even suggests that you make her uncomfortable, I -- I will be forced to deal with you. That's all.

Ric: So you're threatening to tell Alexis?

Sonny: I'm -- you're giving me no voice here. I'll do what I have to do to stop you, Ric.

Ric: You're saying you'd kill me because Sam's feelings got hurt?

Sonny: Alexis needs her daughter more than she needs you. If someone has to be sacrificed -- you do the math.

Lainey: How you feeling, Alexis?

Alexis: Bad. I keep trying to rest so that I'll get stronger and I just get more tired.

Lainey: There is nothing more exhausting than emotional turmoil. You have the stress of your illness, you witnessed Ric and Sam's sexual encounter, and there's your obsession with trying to control everybody's lives from your hospital bed.

Alexis: I can't tell Sam and Ric that I saw them together. It's obvious that they both feel horribly guilty, and they're both trying to help me give me what I need. I just wish that I could forgive them.

Lainey: So does that mean that you're ready to stop playing games with your husband and your daughter?

Alexis: I think that's really unfair. I do. I think that's an unfair categorization.

Lainey: Alexis, you're pushing your daughter towards your husband to test their loyalty. What would you call it?

Alexis: Desperation. I call it "a mother with cancer who wants to make sure that her children are cared for." It's a real curious thing what happens when you try to deal with -- with the process of your own death.

Lainey: See? Maybe that's the very thing you're trying to avoid. This compulsion for trying to decide how everybody's lives are going to go after you're gone may be the thing that's distracting you from your own mortality. But wouldn't it be better to settle emotional debts, to forgive people who need forgiveness? To set them free to live lives of their own making?

Alexis: Whoa, there, doctor, I'm not dead yet.

Lainey: Then don't act like it, Alexis. See, I don't believe that you really want Ric and Sam to be a couple, but everything you're doing is pushing them in that direction.

Alexis: I don't want them to be a couple, I want them to be a family, because whether I like it or not, if I'm not here, they're the only family that Molly and Kristina have, and I want them to be happy.

Lainey: Alexis, please, just stop rationalizing and just stop and just talk to me. How would you really feel if Molly and Kristina and Ric and Sam become one big happy family?

Alexis: I want to accept that. I want it to be okay.

Lainey: Well, if you keep up with this strategy, Sam might be sleeping with Ric on a permanent basis. Is that really okay with you?

Alexis: I hate it. I hate it.

Michael: In your chest.

Max: No fair. You can't be shooting -- hey, hey, you got to stay on that side of -- ow!

Sonny: You got to do better than that, Max.

Max: Oh, I -- uh -- was just --

Michael: Hey, Dad. We're spending the night.

Sonny: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. What's up? What's up?

Morgan: Hey-hey!

Michael: Oh, we're -- we're spending the night.

Max: Yeah -- uh -- Carly brought them over. It's Leticia's night off, and she said she had some important business to take care of.

Morgan: Hey, I'm going to get my gun.

Sonny: What's so important that your mom's doing?

Michael: Oh, Jax is over again.

Morgan: Hey. Ah.

[Knock on door]

Jax: For you.

Carly: It would've been smarter to bring your laptop or PDA. We have lots of business to cover.

Jax: You will have my full attention. Trust me.

Carly: You think I'm going to romance you to keep you from selling my hotel in Albany?

Jax: Well, if that dress is any indication, I will be putty in your hands.

Carly: Ooh.

Jax: But, no, I'm willing to -- you know, to do whatever. It's your -- it's your evening.

Carly: Right. I cooked.

Jax: Really?

Carly: Yeah.

Jax: Wow. I'm flattered.

Carly: Pizza and tater tots. That should go well with wine. Is this stuff any good?

Jax: That's a 1963 mo-- never mind. You know, there's probably three more bottles where that came from -- in the world -- but, hey, you know what? If you want to have really expensive wine with frozen pizza, let's -- let's do it. Let's do it; it'll be fun.

Carly: You really are trying to butter me up. I lied, we're not having frozen pizza. I ordered in takeout from Via Portofino.

Jax: Oh, that's --

Carly: Do you think French wine goes well with Italian food?

Jax: That's really funny. Is this, like, some kind of test or something? Huh?

Carly: Turnabout's fair play.

Jax: Well, do you see me complaining? Huh? I'm not sulking here. I'm not going on about how unfair you are.

Carly: I did not sulk, okay? I didn't sulk.

Jax: Okay. Fine. Did I pass the test?

Carly: When you've passed my test, I'll let you know.

Alexis: I have a terrible confession to make. Sam is a huge disappointment to me. When I found out that she was my firstborn daughter -- I had images in my head. I had ideals, and I'm not saying that these ideals are based on anything real. Just things that I wished for.

Lainey: How does she disappoint you?

Alexis: The way that she thinks. The things that she thinks about, the things that she doesn't think about, the choices she makes -- all of it. And I know that I'm in no position to judge, but I would be lying to you if I told you that she didn't offend me as a woman. She uses her sexuality and her helplessness as a -- as a way to attain her goals, which seem to consist entirely of being somebody else's girlfriend. It's hard for me to take pride in a daughter who doesn't take pride in herself. I'm the first person to admit that I am filled with flaws. But I know who I am as a person, and I have dignity, and I would never sleep with somebody else's husband to get revenge -- especially my own mother's husband.

Lainey: Do you think that this was Sam's idea, that she was the aggressor with Ric?

Alexis: I don't know. I don't know. What difference does it make? They're both adults, they're both responsible. Have you ever seen the way she looks at me? How hard she tries to please me? Because I think all she really wants is to be loved. I think that's all Ric really wants, and I do, I love them both so much. But they just keep disappointing me. And I know that I disappoint them. We're just really damaged people, and I don't want that for my two other daughters.

Lainey: And you're going to leave them in the care of two damaged people who betrayed you?

Alexis: Whew.

Lainey: Will that give you the peace of mind that you're looking for?

Alexis: Whoa. You're not taking any prisoners, are you?

Lainey: You said life was short. Do you want to waste time now? Or do you want to figure out what it is that you really want out of all of this?

Alexis: I don't think that one drunken night of bad judgment negates all the good that somebody does or will do. Sam could've run away, she could've thrown the infidelity in my face for revenge, but she didn't. She's been by my side the whole time since I told her that I had cancer. So has Ric -- once I let him. He's a good father. And in spite of everything, I still love them. But I'm not imagining them getting run over by a speeding bus. I seem to be all over the place.

Lainey: Answer me this -- if you didn't have cancer, and you found Ric and Sam like you did, how would you deal with it?

Alexis: I would confront them both and cut them out of my life. But I don't have that luxury. So I have to believe that Sam and Ric will get over their differences and do what's best for Kristina and Molly, my little girls. Because their happiness and their well-being are all that really matter to me.

Nikolas: There -- there is no way that I can take Kristina and Molly. They both have fathers that would fight me to the death.

Sam: Look, Sonny -- he wants what's best for Kristina, and I know his first choice would be take her for himself, but you might be the -- the best way to honor Alexis' request to have the girls stay together.

Nikolas: Sam, Sam, Ric would never allow me to take Molly, and -- and I don't blame him. Why should any father be away from their child, unless he's dangerous, and I -- why don't you tell me what's really going on? What did he do to you?

Ric: Nikolas.

Nikolas: Hey, Ric.

Ric: Who's at the hospital with Alexis?

Sam: She's there with her doctors. Nikolas -- he wanted to discuss her treatment without her around, so --

Nikolas: Well, you know how she always wants to put a good face on for everyone, and I just -- I need to get the facts, so -- care to join us?

Ric: No, no. I'm meeting somebody. Enjoy. Glad you could make it.

Lorenzo: I'm assuming you've reconsidered my offer.

Ric: It took a while, but you are right. The best way to bring Sonny down is if we work together.

Nikolas: You might as well tell me what's going on. I mean, Ric's married to my aunt, Sam. If he's done something to hurt her, I need to know.

Georgie: Hey. Alice thought we could use a break. It's tea.

Dillon: Oh, great.

Georgie: Yeah.

Dillon: Hey, thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you. Mmm. Oh. Thank you for helping me. I don't know how you stand to be here.

Georgie: I hate this place. We've all made mistakes here and we've all suffered the consequences, especially you and Lulu.

Dillon: It's funny how we do this -- this thing where we carry around this image of ourselves in our head -- you know, who we think we are, how we'd act, how we wouldn't act, how we'd behave -- like, the perfect version of ourselves. And then -- bam -- reality hits us and we realize we're nothing like that person. I mean, three months ago, sleeping with Lulu for any reason would've been unthinkable, I never would've been untrue to you. And three weeks ago, I would've told you that I'd be an amazing dad. So, who I am and who I think I am are miles apart.

Georgie: Dillon, you are a great person who made some mistakes. But I know you, and you're going to learn from them.

Dillon: "Well, that which doesn't kill us makes us stronger." And smarter, if we're lucky.

Georgie: I know. But if Lulu decided to have the baby, you would've been the best father that you could possibly be.

Dillon: Yeah, well, I guess we'll never know. In a couple of days she's going to have the abortion and this is all going to go away as if it never happened.

Georgie: Yeah. But at least you can move on with your life like you planned, right?

Dillon: Yeah, but how selfish does that make me?

Georgie: Don't judge yourself, Dillon, and please try not to judge Lulu. She -- she went through a lot to make this choice. You guys did the best you could do in this situation and that's all anyone can ask.

Dillon: Well, I know one thing I've always gotten right -- loving you.

Sam: Ric and I, we don't get along mostly because of Jason -- I love him, he hates him.

Nikolas: Okay, I don't mean to --I don't mean to sound insensitive here, but your mother has cancer. Aren't her wishes more important than some residual loyalty you have to your ex-boyfriend?

Ric: Jason's the biggest problem. You get him out of commission, then Sonny's no longer a problem. He's powerless.

Lorenzo: You want to kill Jason so we don't have to kill Sonny. It's so admirable how you protect your brother. But I'll tell you, Ric, I do understand the impulse because I did the same for my brother, Luis -- the difference being Luis owed loyalty in return, and Sonny treats you like something on the bottom of his shoe.

Ric: I'm just prioritizing. Jason's your biggest threat.

Lorenzo: Jason's not like Sonny. He doesn't act on impulse, he's detached. So we need to be calculated in how we provoke Jason into making a mistake. Do you have suggestions?

Ric: Well, I have access to at least one of Jason's main weaknesses. If we can exploit that, Jason will make a potentially fatal error.

Nikolas: With all due respect, I've known Alexis far longer than Ric or you, and I trust her judgment. So I'm going to abide by her wishes until you give me a reason not to. And I'm sorry, until you -- until you tell me whatever it is that you're not telling me, I just can't help you.

Carly: You know what it would mean to the Metro brand to have this hotel in Albany? It's great, and I found this guy who's making a name for himself in hotel design. We can make the place even better.

Jax: I thought you wanted to do the decor yourself.

Carly: Well, I'll oversee everything.

Jax: Do you realize that you'll be spending, like, three or four nights away, you know, to oversee this project, to make sure that it runs smoothly?

Carly: Sonny has the boys three nights a week anyway, so it should be fine.

Jax: What, so two kids, two hotels, half the time on the road -- you'll have absolutely no time for a personal life.

Carly: Who says I need one?

Jax: You know, the most successful business people realize the importance of downtime -- you know, pleasure, relaxation?

Carly: Says the man that went gallivanting around Africa for three months?

Jax: Was I really gone for that long?

Carly: I only noticed because I kept waiting to hear from you.

Jax: I know, I should've called. I really wanted to, more times than you know.

Carly: Instead, you waited for me to come chasing after you?

Jax: No. I'm a little burnt on rejection, Carly. You know, I have a pretty healthy ego, and after all the things that have happened in the -- in the last year, all the disappointments, I --

Carly: So I get to pay for what everyone else has done?

Jax: Yeah, well, that's usually how it goes.

Carly: You're not the only one that's been hurt, Jax. The difference is I've been hurt by you.

Jax: Yeah, well, you already have my heart. And when you return that -- that pendant that I gave you, I know that you'll trust me again, and I don't mind having to earn it.

Michael: Hi!

Sonny: Get up here.

Carly: Hi.

Jax: Hey.

Carly: Hey there. What's going on?

Sonny: I'm so sorry to interrupt.

Carly: Hey, hi! What's going on? You're supposed to be with your dad tonight.

Sonny: Yeah, well, Dad was taken by surprise because Mommy never cleared it with him.

Carly: Oh.

Michael: Hey, what are those?

Jax: Oh, those are canapés. Why don't you go over there and try one, let me know how they are.

Carly: Excuse me. Talk to Dad for a minute, outside.

Sonny: Well, I can't really stay long. I got things to do, so -- but if you want to talk --

Carly: You can stay long enough to explain what's going on. I'm in the middle of an important meeting with Jax!

Sonny: In that dress?

Carly: He's trying to sell my hotel in Albany. I'm just trying to convince him not to.

Sonny: Oh, so it's one way -- oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean --

Carly: You -- you're not allowed to do that, okay? Why don't you just take the boys home, please? Stop being jealous.

Sonny: I'm not jealous. I got other plans.

Carly: Then let Max take them for a ride, or turn a video on in another room.

Sonny: Lainey's coming over to give me a therapy session.

Carly: She's making house calls now?

Sonny: Yeah, yeah, since my records were stolen from her, you know, her office, she doesn't have a choice. The last thing I want to do is spill my guts in front of the children, you know? So, next time, just -- just give me a little -- give me a little notice and we'll work it out.

Carly: You're so transparent. Nine times out of 10, you would be more than happy to cancel a therapy session. But you are trying to use the boys to ruin my reunion with Jax.

Sonny: I thought you didn't want Jax back.

Carly: Well, whether I do or not, yore not allowed to interfere.

Sonny: You know what, Carly? You can shake your moneymaker with Jax or anybody else, okay, but do it on your own time. Tonight you have the boys, which means your romance can wait. Have a nice evening.

Dr. Trent: Deep breath.

[Alexis coughs]

Alexis: That happens every once in a while -- but I feel much better.

Dr. Trent: That's good.

Alexis: So when do I get to go home?

Dr. Trent: I'm all for positive thinking, Alexis, but lying to your physician isn't helpful.

Alexis: So I'm a little tired. What do you want from me? I've been through hell.

Dr. Trent: Are you listless?

Alexis: I'm miserable, okay? I hate this hospital. I hate it here, I hate being poked, I hate being prodded, I hate being woken up in the middle of the night, only for somebody to tell me that I need more rest.

Dr. Trent: Gee, I've never heard those complaints before.

Alexis: And you never heard them from me.

Dr. Trent: Alexis, I know this is hard, but I can't let you undermine your recovery, and you're going to need every ounce of strength you have.

Alexis: What's wrong?

Dr. Trent: We're not going to be able to start your chemo as soon as I'd hoped. 

Sonny: Sorry I'm late. Carly brought the kids over, right, without telling me.

Lainey: Was --

Sonny: So I brought -- I brought them back to her house.

Lainey: Was there a mix-up?

Sonny: Have a seat. Uh -- no. Jax and -- and Carly -- well, they're dating. They were on a date -- you know, whatever.

Lainey: Oh. And you decided to use your kids to throw a monkey wrench in her plans?

Sonny: No. Jax and Carly can date. It's none of my business, you know.

Lainey: The object of therapy is to be honest about your feelings, Sonny.

Sonny: Yeah, I am. I'm being honest. It's not going to get -- go anywhere because it's not going to get serious. Because he's a player and that's what he is, you know?

Lainey: He's not without his charms.

Sonny: Well, that's up for debate. You know, I know what he's really about. I got his number. He was married to my sister.

Lainey: And a former girlfriend, right? What was her name?

Sonny: Brenda. You don't -- you don't miss a trick, do you? But here's -- you know what? Here's what's going to happen. He -- he's going to dazzle Carly with his phony romance, then he's going to dump her. She's going to get hurt; her heart's going to be broken. But you know what? It's fine, because as long as my kids aren't hurt, then I'm not going to interfere.

Lainey: And what if you're wrong? What if Carly and Jax actually fall in love? Then what would you do?

Carly: Hey!

[Michael laughs]

Carly: Michael, that's not funny. Stop throwing your food.

Michael: Well, Dad let's us.

Carly: I don't care what your dad let's you do.

Jax: Hey, you know what? I know -- I know a way to play with your food and eat it at the same time.

Michael: How?

Jax: Take your pieces of pizza, and you eat them in -- not yet -- you eat them into a perfect circle, okay, and whoever gets the most perfect circle wins a prize.

Michael: Kung fu crazy, right?

Carly: I'm afraid to ask.

Jax: It's a game cartridge. Right?

Michael: Mm-hmm.

Carly: Okay. You heard Jax. Ready, steady -- go. I'm really sorry. This was not how I thought the evening was going to play out.

Jax: No. Are you kidding?

Michael: I won!

Jax: There's no place I'd rather be.

Morgan: Uh -- no.

Jax: Hey, hey, hey, hey, I'm the judge and jury here. Let's have a look. Whoa. Wow. This is going to be a tough one. I don't know. Looks like it's going to be a rematch.

[Carly laughs]

Michael: Sweet.

Ric: You and Nikolas looked pretty intense. What was that all about?

Sam: He was worried about Alexis. You should try it sometime instead of having meetings with Lorenzo Alcazar.

Ric: Well, I'm the DA, he's a known gangster. I just figured I'd put him on notice.

Sam: Oh, really? By meeting him for drinks?

Ric: We can be civil. You should try it.

Sam: Leave me alone.

[Alexis coughs]

Ric: You all right? I'm going to page your doctor.

Alexis: Don't bother. He already knows.

Sam: Knows what?

Alexis: That I have pneumonia.

Sam: Oh, God.

Ric: Well, then they are going to know what they're dealing with and they'll know how to treat it.

Alexis: It is ironic, though, you know. They take out a portion of my lung, I survive the surgery, and before I even get a chance to beat the cancer, the pneumonia kills me -- but enough of the jokes. Ric, can you come over here? We need talk. Apparently, I may not have much time.

>> On the next "General Hospital" --

Sonny: It's never going to get serious.

Lainey: Because Carly will never love anyone besides you?

Alexis: They are going to give me this medically induced coma.

Lulu: I don't know how to prepare to get unpregnant.

Luke: I'm pretty sure nobody does.

Elizabeth: how can I tell Lucky? He may not even be the father.

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