General Hospital Transcript Wednesday 5/14/03
Proofread by Alicia
>> Previously on "General Hospital" --
Edward: Who are you?
Alexis: [British accent] Dobson, Sir.
Skye: I've decided I want a baby, and I'd like you to be the father.
Emily: Zander needs to get on with his own life.
Monica: And you're a very important part of that.
Emily: Not for very long.
Faith: Ric will propose. You will say no.
Elizabeth: If you ask me to marry you, my answer will be yes.
Jason: Will you marry me?
Skye: Just envision the child that we could make together. Your twinkling eyes, my stubborn chin. Your charm, my fire.
Jax: You know what? There's just one problem. This remarkable children's parents aren't together. I'm sorry. I don't want to hurt you, Skye.
Skye: Jax, Iím not asking for us to get back together. I'm not. I'm just saying you supply the genetic material and I will do the rest on my own.
Jax: Absolutely not.
Edward: Dobson, huh? The agency didn't schedule any Dobson.
Alexis: [British accent] yes, quite right, Sir. I don't put much stock in third parties. I'm a self-made man.
Edward: Hmm, I see. Well, how long have you been in service?
Alexis: 20 years, Sir.
Edward: I see that your references for the most -- oh, they're all from --
Alexis: England, Sir. Specifically Dorchester and Hereford, and of course, London.
Edward: Oh, of course.
Alexis: I'm a recent immigrant, Sir. But I assure you, all my papers are in order.
Edward: You see, I don't put much stock in paperwork. It's too easily tampered with. No, you see, if I -- if I would choose to hire you as a Quartermaine butler, you'll have to pass a little test first.
Emily: Just stop.
Zander: What's wrong?
Emily: I don't want to be held, ok?
Zander: Ok. Emily, I know you're angry, but you got to understand everything Iím doing is because I love you. Em, I know rehab's hard, but your family is enabling you by letting you come back here. You're never going to kick the drugs this way.
Emily: Ok, you're not my rehab counselor or some wise, all-knowing miracle worker who's going to get me off drugs and keep me clean. You're the reason I started using again in the first place!
Carly: All right, we're here. Very romantic. Is the abduction complete? Hmm? Can I call Jason and just see if he proposed to Courtney?
Sonny: Ok, wait.
Sonny: I take my wife, all right, to a tropical island --
Sonny: With a cabana on the sand, with the surf just outside there. Can you hear that?
Carly: It's nice.
Sonny: With the moonlight spilling in. And you want to make a phone call?
Carly: Yeah. Well, I want to enjoy myself, so I think --
Sonny: All right, let's get started.
Carly: Ok, just one -- one, just -- I want to see if he proposed to Courtney, that's all.
Sonny: How is that any of your business?
Carly: Ok, I am curious, and so are you, but you just won't admit it. One phone call, and I will make it worth your while.
Sonny: Ok, you know what? Wait, wait, wait. Hold on. Give me that phone for a second. Let me tell you something. I'm the one --
Sonny: With the incentive for you, all right? Come here. Come here for a second.
Carly: What are you doing?
Sonny: Ah -- ah -- ah --
Carly: What's that?
Sonny: Ok, this is for you, right? But you only get to open it if you agree not to speak the words "marriage proposal" and "engagement" for the rest of the night. And no phone calls.
Carly: You're bribing me.
Sonny: Yeah. Is it working?
Ric: I need to explain.
Elizabeth: No, no, please, let me get this out first, ok? Please. I never, ever thought I could forgive you for all the secrets and the lies. But in the end, none of that outweighs the way I feel when Iím with you. I believe you love me, Ric. And despite everything, I love you. I still love you.
Ric: Elizabeth, please stop.
Elizabeth: And listen, I believe that you can change. I believe it so much, I've decided to take a leap of faith and put my future in your hands.
Ric: No, it's too late. I'm marrying Courtney.
Jason: I love you. And I want us to spend the rest of our lives together -- I mean, if it's not too soon for you.
Courtney: No. The only thing that'll change is Iíll love you even more.
Jason: Then will you be my wife?
Jason: I don't -- I don't have a ring yet. I've never done this before, so I thought maybe -- maybe we can go together and you can pick one out, you know?
Courtney: I already have one. Jason, Ric asked me to marry him. It's one of his sick mind games to get to Sonny.
Jason: How'd he threaten you?
Courtney: Ric has the murder weapon that killed Fowler -- that guy in the dumpster. He said he has a tire iron with your fingerprints on it, and if I don't marry him, it'll go straight to Baldwin, and Baldwin will send you to prison. And if he even suspects that I told you or Sonny, Baldwin gets the tire iron. So, to protect you, I have to say yes to Ric's proposal.
Ric: You told me that we were through.
Elizabeth: If this is some kind of joke, Ric, it's not funny.
Ric: You told me that there was no chance for us.
Elizabeth: You're serious. You're marrying Courtney?
Elizabeth: Ric, she's in love with Jason.
Ric: Courtney and I have an understanding.
Elizabeth: About what? About what?
Ric: I can't say a reason. Don't ask me again.
Elizabeth: You know what, you're -- you're crazy. You're crazy. Or maybe I am. Or maybe -- maybe it's just the both of us -- you -- you for seriously thinking that you're going to marry Courtney, and me for letting you get inside my heart. God, how stupid does that make me, that I would keep coming back here and that I would actually believe you and that Iíd put myself through this over and over?
Ric: I am not the man that you thought I was. I'm not the man you thought I was.
Elizabeth: Don't touch me!
Ric: All right, I keep tearing you up inside, and that's not the kind of man that you want to spend the rest of your life with. Please --
Elizabeth: Stop acting like you care. This is about revenge on Sonny, isn't it? I was just entertainment to pass the time. You know what? You are worse than your brother, you know that, Ric? Because Sonny is cold and he's twisted and he hurts everyone around him, but at least he's capable of love. All you know how to do is lie.
Skye: Jax, Iím back on the program. I'm going to meetings. I -- being around Kristina has changed my life. And she likes me, you know? She holds onto my hand when she's sitting in my lap, and she now knows the difference between cotton and cashmere. And who taught her that? Me, thank you very much.
Jax: I'm very happy for Kristina, and I'm very happy for you.
Skye: Jax, look, I know I can do this, ok? I was told a long time ago that I might have a problem carrying to full term, but with the advances in fertility, I'm sure they can work around my problem. I can do this. I know I can.
Jax: I canít. Or I won't. I grew up in a family where my parents were very devoted to each other and their marriage. I'm not going to set my child up for anything less.
Skye: What, so it's ok for Alexis the unstable to be a mother, but not me?
Jax: Skye, this has nothing to do with Alexis or you being a mother. This has everything to do with me. I'm not going to help conceive a child and then not be a full-time father.
Skye: Well, you said you didn't want to be involved, but if you want to be, that's fine.
Jax: Skye I want to be a father, ok? Someday. And I want to be involved directly with my children and their mother. And that's not possible with you and I. So Iím sorry.
Skye: You think I'd be a bad mother? Wow, I guess that pretty much answers that.
Jax: Skye, I think you would make a wonderful mother. I've seen you with Kristina. Yes, I think you would make a wonderful mother.
Skye: Just not to your child.
Jax: To your child, Skye. To your own son or daughter.
Edward: Now, Reginald may have been derelict in answering the door, and his manhattans were absolutely terrible. But my, could that man mix a good martini.
Alexis: [British accent] priorities, Sir.
Edward: Thank you. Who are you trying to fool?
Alexis: Too weak, sir?
Edward: Too lousy.
Alexis: My apologies, Sir. My previous employer drank only single malt scotch.
Edward: Ugh. So, now that we've established that you are a failure at mixing drinks, how are you at dealing with the staff?
Alexis: In my experience, Sir, it is the butler who sets the standards for the rest of the servants. If he is loyal, discreet, and impeccable in his duties, the others will naturally follow suit.
Edward: Ha! Don't count on it.
Alexis: Am I to understand Sir, that you are experiencing difficulties with your staff?
Edward: Well, you might say Cook is a maniac. And those maids think that they are doing us a big favor if they even show up to work.
Alexis: How deplorable.
Edward: And you know something? Reginald encouraged them. Now, I want you to take the opposite approach.
Alexis: Am I to understand --
Edward: I am desperate enough to hire you on a trial basis only.
Alexis: Thank you, Sir.
Edward: Boy, you have a good, strong grip. You know, Reginald has a grip like a debutante. You wait right here. All right, you people, I want everybody in the foyer! Chop-chop. Alan, Monica, A.J., Dillon --
Alan: Now what?
Monica: Keep your voice down. Emily's trying to sleep.
Alice: I just put the baby down.
A.J.: What's wrong?
Edward: Nothing is wrong. I just want you to know that our -- our domestic situation has taken a turn for the better. Follow me.
Edward: Ladies and gentlemen, may I present our new butler, Dobson.
Zander: Come on, Em. You already said that I had nothing to do with you starting to do drugs again.
Emily: Ok, I was lying. I didn't want you to feel bad. But my counselor says that I have to be honest, and this -- this pressure that you're always heaping on me, I can't handle it! I used drugs to get away from it.
Zander: Ok. Ok. Just tell me what it is that I do, and I'll stop it. Just tell me what I did.
Emily: Ok, I don't buy it. I don't buy it. It's how you are, and you shouldn't have to change, but this isn't working.
Zander: Ok, I don't buy it. You sound just like you did when you tried to break up with me because your grandfather was blackmailing you.
Emily: Ok, just because this isn't what you want to hear --
Zander: No, because you're lying to cover up something.
Emily: Ok, see, this is the pressure that I am talking about!
Zander: What pressure? It's not pressure to want the truth, Emily. Why are you pushing me away?
Emily: Because I want my life back, and I can't have it!
Zander: You can get your life back. You're strong enough, Em. I know that better than anybody. But if it's too much having me around in your life while you go through this --
Emily: Ok, you are not hearing me, Zander. You're the problem. I don't feel about you the way you do about me, and I can't fake it anymore.
Zander: Come on, Em, you haven't been faking.
Emily: Ok, you have no idea. But I can't keep doing it.
Zander: Forget it. I don't believe you.
Emily: Hey, this is exactly what I am talking about, Zander. You don't hear me. You make up your mind, you decide what you want or need, and that's it. It doesn't work that way for me! I've grown up! We both wanted to believe that this would last forever. It's not going to, Zander. What we had is gone, and it's never coming back. Stop living in the past!
Zander: Emily, come on. What we've had since you've come home -- being happy together -- that was real.
Emily: It's what you needed to believe, so I played along. And when it hurt too much, I took drugs to make the pain go away. It's not your fault, Zander. It's mine. I can't love you the way you need. I can't give you my whole life, so it's better to let you go. I need you out of my life. You have to stop caring about me.
Zander: Message received. I won't care anymore about anything.
Emily: It's Emily.
Gia: What's wrong?
Emily: Yeah, I broke up with Zander. He just left. Please, find him and stop him from doing anything crazy.
Monica: My daughter Emily is going through a rather private, trying time.
Alan: Make sure you're sensitive with her.
Edward: And remember that any tales told outside this house are cause for immediate dismissal.
Monica: And whatever anyone may imply, I am the owner of this house, and what I say goes.
Edward: But I am the one that is hiring you, and I sign your checks.
A.J.: Actually, a machine at the corporate headquarters writes those checks.
Alan: Reginald pays the household bills, doesn't he?
Alice: Yes, Reginald pays the bills.
Edward: And you know something -- your duties are to coordinate between the gardener and the florist to be sure that fresh flowers are delivered every morning to my wife's room. Her name is Lila, and she is very devoted to Reginald, so you have your work cut out for you.
Monica: Your duty is also to make sure the upstairs maid re-irons the sheets before she makes the bed.
Alice: You take the gardener, and I'll ride shotgun with the linens.
Edward: And when Alanís fraudulent, illegitimate daughter shows up, please do not try to sneak her any liquor.
Alan: Her name is Skye, and you are to treat her as a member of this family.
Dillon: Hi, I'm Dillon. You can feel free to ignore me.
A.J.: Ahem. Does he know about Cook?
Edward: I told him that Cook was a maniac, if that's what you're asking.
Alan: Get in good with her.
Monica: If you could persuade Cook to consult the family regarding the menu, I will throw in a bonus.
Alan: I will, too.
Edward: I'll say.
Alice: Don't even waste your time. It'll never happen.
A.J.: Listen, Dobson, I want a daily tray -- coffee, black, dry toast, and the morning paper is to be folded to market page.
Edward: And when the doorbell rings, no matter where I am standing, it will be your respons-- oh, oh, oh, oh, here's Ned carrying the newest addition to our family, little baby Kristina. Ned, Iíd like to have you meet Dobson, Reginaldís replacement.
Alan: Temporary is right.
Ned: Do I know you from somewhere?
Carly: Ahem. It fits.
Sonny: Uh-oh. Uh-oh.
Carly: Oh, it fits and it is gorgeous, Sonny.
Sonny: I guess a dress that doesn't fit and is ugly wouldn't be a surprise, right?
Carly: Uh-uh. You play dirty.
Sonny: Yeah, well, you know what?
Sonny: Don't you forget you can't mention Jason, Courtney, or marriage.
Carly: Oh, I see, but you get to mention them all you want. Is that how it works, huh?
Sonny: No, not really. I just -- I'm just interested in only one thing tonight, and that -- that is you, honey.
Sonny and Carly: Oh --
Sonny: Wow, look at that.
Carly: Oh, God. You are torturing me, you know that, right?
Sonny: Yeah. Well, you know, it could be worse, Carly. I mean --
Sonny: Yeah, right. You know what? I will agree not to say those three words. How's that? And you will be amply compensated.
Carly: I better be.
Jason: I didn't kill Fowler.
Courtney: I know. I -- I heard Ric and Faith arguing about it. She says she wants you tried and convicted before somebody finds out that Ric is the one who really murdered Fowler.
Jason: Is this what you were running across the street to tell me when you got hit by the car?
Jason: Well, why didn't you just tell me in the emergency room?
Courtney: Ric was in my cubicle before you came in, and he threatened to give the tire iron to Baldwin if I said anything to you or Sonny.
Jason: Ok, Courtney, before you ever agree to anything, if someone threatens you -- blackmail, I don't care what it is -- you have to come to me first.
Jason: Ok? No matter what they say they have on me or Sonny or Carly or anyone else, you've got to come to me.
Courtney: All right, but we have got to find that iron and Iím going to buy you --
Jason: No, I'm going to take care of it.
Courtney: Jason, if I don't accept Ricís proposal tonight, he'll assume that I told you, and Baldwinís going to get the tire iron. Baldwin doesn't care who really killed Fowler. Come on, I mean, he'll use any excuse to send you to prison.
Jason: I'm going to find the tire iron.
Courtney: I just -- I just want to buy you the time to do it, ok? Just let me do this for you, Jason. Come on, you could wind up in prison. Ok, I'll just -- Iíll make Ric believe that Iím afraid and weak and that Iíll do anything he says to protect you, and I'll only have to fake it just long enough to buy you --
Jason: And what happens if Ric wants to take you to bed?
Courtney: I have no intention of letting Ric touch me.
Jason: Neither did Carly. Ric wants Sonny destroyed. He's not going to think twice about touching you whether you like it or not.
Courtney: It'll only be for a little while, maybe a day or two.
Jason: A day or two? Ric can do a lot of damage in a day or two.
Courtney: I'm only telling him what he wants to hear long enough for you to -- to find the tire iron. And then I want to get married for real to the only man Iím ever going to love.
Jason: Can you meet him -- meet him in a public place?
Courtney: Yeah, the park.
Courtney: That's where he asked me to marry him in the first place.
Jason: Well, I guess we got to tell him yes. But you use me as a threat. If he pushes you too far, you got to tell him that you're going to tell Sonny and I the truth about everything. Ok?
Jason: And Ric only gets what he wants if you cooperate. Make him work for it. If he's nice, you're nice. If he's not, you take off.
Courtney: Ok, don't worry. I can handle this.
Jason: No, I'm worried. I'm worried because if something goes wrong, I'm getting you out of there and that's it. This is done.
Jason: You just be careful.
Courtney: Don't worry. I have way too much to lose.
Jason: Is Sonny in?
Max: No, he and Carly took off someplace. Sonny left instructions for no one to contact him.
Alexis: [British accent] if we've met, I certainly don't recall the occasion. I've just arrived from England, Sir.
Ned: What family were you working with there?
Alexis: The Colonel and Lady Heatherington of London.
Ned: Did you check his references?
Edward: Of course. Yeah, and look -- look how eager he is to get to work.
Alan: How much experience do you have with children?
Alexis: The Heatheringtons had three, Sir, all under the age of 6. I can assure you there were no dull moments.
Edward: Well, you'll have your hands full with this family here. And actually, you won't have to worry about the baby because Alice is the baby's nanny and we help her, also. Actually, you'll have very little to do with the baby except when it comes to protecting her from her lunatic mother.
Ned: Grandfather, don't start.
Edward: No, the woman is a prime example of the dangers of inbreeding. Do you know -- do you know what she did? She admitted to murdering a man and then she avoided prison by pretending to be insane.
Monica: Alexis is suffering from a mental illness.
Alan: Disassociative Identity Disorder. She's under a doctor's care.
Edward: She somehow managed to finagle supervised visitations, so when she comes here to the house, your job will be to keep her from sneaking off with this baby.
Alexis: The child's mother doesn't live here?
A.J.: She's lucky she's not in cell block eight.
Edward: Oh, just like the rest of her bizarre family, she is one brick short of a load, but very sly.
Ned: He's exaggerating. Kristina's mother is struggling with a serious psychological illness, but she's making great strides.
Edward: All I'm saying is when Alexis Davis comes into this house, you have to be prepared and you have to expect the worst.
Alexis: How disturbing and unfortunate.
Alice: It's time for Kristinaís bottle.
Ned: I'll feed her.
Courtney: Are you ok?
Elizabeth: Spare me the fake sympathy. First you take Jason, and now Ric? Here's something else.
Courtney: That is the last time you will ever slap me again, Elizabeth.
Elizabeth: What, don't like it? Then stay away from my boyfriends.
Courtney: What did Ric tell you?
Elizabeth: That you're marrying him. Is it true?
Elizabeth: Isn't that a little sick? You're marrying your -- I don't even know, what would you call it? Your half-brother's half-brother? But then again, you did jump from your husband to his brother without a divorce in between. I don't know, maybe it's your pattern. Maybe it's your way of getting a thrill out of it or something -- I don't know.
Courtney: Ok, I know this seems like it's coming out of nowhere, but Ric is offering me something that I want and I have to become his wife to get it.
Elizabeth: Oh, really? And what about your pure, eternal love for Jason?
Courtney: I want what Ricís offering me more.
Elizabeth: What started all this? When did this all happen? Was it when -- when Ric kidnapped you? Or did that even really happen? Was it just a story you made up, like the A.J. stalker thing, to get sympathy from everybody?
Courtney: Ok, Elizabeth, I know you're hurting, ok, and I'm doing you the courtesy of trying to explain to you, but if you --
Elizabeth: No, don't -- I don't want your courtesy. I don't even want to see your face. What did I ever do to you? I'll tell you what -- tell you what -- this is what Iím going to do. I'm going to fall for the first guy I trip over tonight so you can run after him and take him, too, ok?
Courtney: Think about it, Elizabeth -- if Ric truly cared about you, he wouldn't do what he's doing. Come on, maybe it'll all work out for us in the end.
Elizabeth: Just stay away from me, Courtney. Ok? Oh, and one more thing -- I wouldn't be picking out wedding dresses if I were you just yet. You might not make it to the altar -- or, should I say, Ric won't, not when Sonny finds out.
Carly: Oh, whoo! Whoo!
Sonny: The cashier would've held your winnings on account, Carly.
Carly: Yeah, but then I wouldn't be able to look at it.
Sonny: What are you going to do with all this money?
Carly: I'm going to spend it -- on you if you're nice.
Sonny: Oh, I can be nice.
Carly: Just admit it.
Carly: You had them fix the tables for me again, didn't you?
Sonny: You are completely capable of getting whatever you want on your own.
Carly: That's true, but it does help when your husband happens to own the casino.
Sonny: I just love to see you win. I get this incredible high just seeing you happy and knowing that you're mine.
Carly: I love you.
Sonny: How you holding up? Do I get you into bed right now, or do you still got a little more energy?
Carly: Oh. Well, what do you have in mind?
Sonny: Uh -- come with me. La, la, la, la I wonder how Jason and Courtney are doing.
Carly: Oh, let's see. Oh, you cheat. You cheat so bad.
Sonny: Yeah? Yeah?
Sonny: You're going to have to take off your dress now.
Sonny: All right? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa -- wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. In a minute.
Sonny: What, what, what?
Carly: Did you feel that?
Carly: The baby just kicked. I guess he's happy to be here, too.
Emily's voice: "Zander would stay with me through the cancer if I let him. He'd stay until the very, very end, but I love him too much for that. That's why I have to let him go before he suspects and promises to see me through this. Zander doesn't know how cancer works yet, but I do. No matter what they say or what treatment they try, I know Iím going to die." The south side Ė
Alice: I like a man in touch with his feminine side. It's lights out for this one. I just had to find her lamby. She likes to look at it when she goes to sleep. Hello? Hello?
Alexis: [British accent] her blanket seems to be trailing a bit.
Alice: Oh. Why, thank you.
Skye: Who's this?
Alexis: Dobson, Madam. I'll be covering for Reginaldís duties while he's incapacitated. And you are?
Skye: Skye Quartermaine.
Alexis: Ah, yes.
Skye: Alan's daughter. May I ask why Kristina isn't asleep?
Alice: Oh, I was just rounding up lamby.
Skye: Ok. All right, my little princess brat, I will see you soon. Have you been warned about the child's mother?
Alexis: It is my understanding that the mother is only permitted to see her little one twice weekly.
Skye: Oh. She will do anything that she can to get around that court order, and do not let her. That woman -- you give her an inch, she will take a mile. And no doubt she will paint herself as a devoted mother -- no doubt about that -- conveniently forgetting the fact that she did ignore doctor's orders which caused her baby to be born prematurely. And while the baby was in the hospital, she kills a man, lets two innocent people stand trial, accuses a third, and tops off her crime spree by kidnapping her own baby and keeping it away from the family. Yes, Alexis is quite a hypocrite and the most tightly wound neurotic you will ever meet. Under no circumstances do you ever let her in without any family supervision, preferably me or Ned.
Skye: Oh, Ned, in here.
Ned: Look, I have an emergency phone call I need to take. Will you do me a favor and read Kristina her bedtime story?
Skye: Oh. Oh, I'd love to.
Skye: Of course. Well, good luck with the family. You're going to need it. Hold up, little princess. I'm coming.
Sonny: I can't feel anything.
Carly: Well -- well, look at your hands.
Sonny: All right.
Carly: Loosen it up, ok? Relax. You're too tense.
Sonny: Maybe I should wait till the kid's a little more predictable.
Carly: No, it's --
Sonny: Whoa. I think I -- was that it?
Carly: That was it.
Sonny: That was it?
Carly: Yes, it was.
Sonny: Hey. Whoa, he did it again. Can you feel my hand there, kid? Do you know who I am, huh?
Carly: Oh, he knows.
Sonny: I love you for carrying this kid -- the way you love him, the way you love me.
Carly: It's easy to love you. Sometimes.
Sonny: And the rest of the time, what?
Carly: It's very, very difficult, but very much worth it.
Jason: No, I need to speak to Sonny.
Man: I'm sorry, Mr. Morgan, but Mr. Corinthos isn't here.
Jason: Yes, he is, and when you see him, you tell him that I need to talk to him right away. It's an emergency.
Ric: Thought I'd hear from you sooner.
Courtney: Yeah, well, it takes a while to get psyched up to accept a proposal from a man you despise. My answer is yes, I'll marry you, Ric --
Courtney: Because I love Jason. And not that Iíd expect you to understand. I mean, you've never loved anybody in your entire life.
Ric: You don't know everything about me.
Courtney: I know that you're a twisted blackmailer. But marrying someone who hates you just to get some sick revenge? I'll never understand that.
Ric: Well, we all have to do things in order to get what we want, don't we? It'll be enough to see the look on Sonny's face when I tell him that we're going to be getting married.
Courtney: Yeah? Well, was it enough to see the look on Elizabethís face when you told her?
>> On the next "General Hospital" --
Bobbie: Oh, my God.
Tony: Did she collapse in the studio?
Courtney: Jason, as soon as you get the tire iron, this will be over.
Ric: I thought that you might be interested in hearing some really great news.
Carly: Oh, you're going to stop off at the pier and drown?
Cameron: Alexis still has a very real problem.
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