The Bold and The Beautiful Transcript Tuesday 4/7/09
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Proofread by Nikky
Neil: I take these up, too, ma'am?
Stephanie: No. Thank you so much, Neil. I really appreciate it.
Taylor: Thank you for humoring me.
Stephanie: Oh. (Laughs) Well, I've been homeless. This is better.
Taylor: No, I mean, uh, maybe with this house not being so empty, it'll feel more like a home again.
Stephanie: Maybe. I'm going upstairs. I'm gonna start unpack--
Taylor: I'm just glad. That's all I'm saying. I'm just-- I'm very happy. I'm happy Nick brought this up. (Sighs)
Stephanie: What the hell are you talking about, "Nick brought this up"?
Jackie: (Sighs) So what do you think?
Nick: Would you quit having a midlife crisis so I could have one?
Jackie: I'm not. I hated that stupid, bloody penthouse.
Nick: Since when?
Jackie: It was your father's idea of appropriate, and well--
Nick: Here I thought you were downsizing.
Jackie: Well, yes. Money is a little bit tighter, I agree, but--
Nick: Don't get me wrong, mother. I like it. I could live here.
Jackie: Well, you wanted that monster of a house, so it's yours.
Nick: Well, I'm just saying, what accounts for the change? If you're not having a crisis, then what or... who are you having?
Bridget: Owen? You're not dressed.
Owen: Wait, wait, wait. I thought I told you to bring a bathing suit.
Bridget: I did.
Owen: Well, then why is it that you look suspiciously empty-handed?
Bridget: Because I'm wearing it. I thought this was a work meeting.
Owen: If you can't have a meeting on the beach in L.A. And get wet, then where can you have one?
Owen: Look what I brought. (Clicks tongue)
Bridget: Oh, so this is a-a surf meeting.
Owen: Oh, come on. 20 minutes. What's it gonna hurt?
Bridget: (Laughs) You rented surfboards.
Owen: Well, I didn't exactly have mine at the office today. Look, when I get some money, I'm gonna buy another board and, uh, next time we do this, we won't have to rent one. I'm thinking about maybe getting a golden retriever, as well.
Bridget: Owen, you are a golden retriever.
Owen: What, is my tongue hanging out of my mouth?
Taylor: That--no. Now wait a minute. I did not say that Nick suggested that you move in. He--he told me that I should give you a call and check on you.
Stephanie: Oh, what? So he just comes here every day and tells you what to do?
Taylor: No, I was trying to get rid of him, actually.
Stephanie: What did he do? Make me sound like some sort of a ca--charity case? Listen, I don't want his pity, and I certainly don't want yours.
Bridget: I am the last person that you would want to consult about a promotional campaign.
Owen: I mean, but you're the designer. You--you're the first person. All right, just key words. Come on, all right? Give me key words.
Bridget: All right, um, "expensive."
Owen: Ooh, no, no. That's a marketing no-no. I'd say, uh, how about "luxurious"?
Bridget: "Luxurious." Okay, that's fine.
Owen: All right. All right, well, how about, um, say, uh, "sleek"?
Owen: All right, okay, fine. Um... how about, uh, si--"sizzling hot"?
Bridget: Sleaze sells movies, not clothes.
Bridget: I think Madame X is more "cool elegance."
Owen: Okay, and so where's the sex?
Bridget: Well, it's graceful and--and very feminine.
Owen: (Laughs) Come on. We're starting to sound like Forrester here.
Bridget: Well... (scoffs) come on, chill out. This is an entirely new career for me.
Owen: Hey, it is for me, as well. I mean, it's a miracle I even got the job, and it's gonna be an even bigger miracle if I can keep it.
Bridget: Yeah, well, Jackie likes you a lot.
Owen: Oh, what, and that's supposed to keep me from being jobless?
Bridget: I think she's just waiting to see, you know, what you're really good at.
Owen: Well, in that case, then I'm toast.
Bridget: Why? I'm sure she can find a lot that you're really good at.
Owen: Well, my Madame X campaign for the fall line isn't exactly going too well so far.
Bridget: I just got here. And we're in our bathing suits, so... (scoffs) come on. Grab your surfboard before I hit you with it.
Owen: Ooh. You know, "cool elegance" is nice, but, uh, I kind of like a take-charge girl with hardly any clothes on.
Bridget: Mm-hmm. Go get your board.
Owen: Ooh. (Chuckles)
Jackie: Oh! I am deeply, deeply offended. I am not "having" anyone, I'll have you know.
Nick: It's not like you do this every week.
Jackie: I moved in here to please absolutely no one except myself.
Nick: Well, that's good. Good. Too bad you can't bottle that attitude, and we could send it off to some people we know.
Jackie: You broke up with Katie?
Nick: No. No, I'm referring to your arch-nemesis Stephanie. I ran into her down at the marina.
Jackie: Oh, really? What was she doing? Throwing another corpse in the sea?
Nick: I'm not sure what she was doing.
Jackie: Don't tell me she washed up on the beach.
Nick: She might as well have.
Taylor: Stephanie, I was not trying to offer you pity.
Stephanie: I'm gonna be out of here within the hour.
Taylor: No, please, listen. This is for me. This is for me. Please, what do I have to do? Beg you?
Stephanie: What did Nick tell you? That he found me wandering around the marina like a lost dog?
Taylor: No, he was concerned.
Stephanie: (Laughs) Honey, if I had drowned, he would be the prime suspect.
Taylor: I think he was really worried. He thought something might happen to you. Er-Eric said the same thing.
Stephanie: Oh, really? Did Eric offer to write a check? (Laughs) How--what do you suppose I would be worth? 50 years of devotion to him-- was he willing to write a check for that?
Taylor: I really think that they had your best interest at heart.
Stephanie: I don't believe that. I don't buy any of that. I really don’t. Eric is an artist...
Stephanie: And I made him a success. He didn't have the slightest idea how to market and sell and package his talent. He wouldn't have had an idea how to do that any more than he could fly to the moon. Do you know how many people in this town never succeed? How many architects and artists and actors that never get anywhere because they don't know how to sell themselves? You know what I realized early on in our marriage? When we first started the business, he would lay awake at night worrying about the size of a font in a print ad. And I thought to myself, what the hell? What's such a big decision about that? So I started making those decisions. And I started making more and more decisions. And do you know what? It freed him. I was the person that handled the relationships with the clientele, with the banks, with the press. I freed him to become an artist. And how does he pay me back? (Chuckles) He--he lets a couple of little bleach-haired blondes with size "D" melons walk in and squirt hey all over him, and with that, I am gone just like that. Poof!
Jackie: Fired? How is that possible? I mean, did she even have a job to be fired from?
Nick: Well, technically, no. She left herself vulnerable.
Nick: She trusted. She committed herself to being a wife and a mother. She made sure that everyone worked and everyone played nicely together.
Jackie: Well, if she'd had a title, it would probably have been "Administrative Lubricant."
Nick: You can't pay people to do that, mother, you know? You--you raise a family. You build a business. You get booted for a younger woman.
Jackie: Hmm. Yeah, well, you know what Stephanie’s like. She probably tortured the new wife unmercifully.
Nick: We are the ones who are gonna be unmercifully tortured if we don't find some investors to get this debt off our back. We need to find some distribution outlets, Mother, to raise our sales.
Nick: Fabrice Dufau-- he must think we're under the bus. He hasn't returned my calls. Maybe you could help me out there.
Jackie: Well, he blasted Clarke’s last collection, you know? (Laughs nervously) We had words.
Nick: What kind of words?
Jackie: Um, I may have called him an old fart.
Nick: Oh. Well, I think you should write him a note and apologize. We need to take drastic action here, Mother. We're bleeding money.
Jackie: You'll think of something, Nicky. I know you will.
Bridget: Look, don't touch it. Let me see.
Owen: Look, I'm fine. It's just my "Iron Man" image that's suffering here.
Bridget: Well, you just took a spill.
Bridget: We can't all be as good as I am.
Owen: Ha. Very funny. Anybody who breaks bottles on the beach should be shot.
Bridget: Or at least severely fined. We don't know you fell on glass. You could've just skidded on rock, you know.
Owen: Yeah, or a big piece of rusty metal. I wonder when my last tetanus shot was.
Bridget: Oh, I used to have that stuff in my car.
Owen: (Grunts) I got a question for you. Do people still get lockjaw?
Bridget: Hundreds of thousands die every year but in the far east.
Owen: Okay. So what about Malibu?
Bridget: Not so much. And there’s got to be some peroxide around here. Don't they keep first aid supplies in these cabanas?
Owen: We got some tequila over there. That's a good disinfectant. You can grab that.
Bridget: Um, okay.
Owen: So what happens? I mean, I'm taking it that their--that their jaw would--just freezes up, right?
Bridget: Um, well, I've never actually seen a case.
Owen: So then what's it followed by?
Bridget: Muscle spasms. What, are you getting in touch with your inner hypochondriac?
Owen: No, I just-- I've never had an actual M.D. Around that I can ask-- ah. Oh, ooh. No, no. It--no. I could ask anything to.
Bridget: It's--we--I-I-- (sucks in air through teeth) Sorry.
Owen: You know-- you know, I think I-- my jaw's starting to freeze up here.
Bridget: (Scoffs) Please.
Owen: No, I'm-- no, I'm serious, like it-- I-I-I think it's spasming. No, look. Look. Right there. Right here. Right--right there.
Jackie: Katie. (Laughs) What are you doing here?
Katie: I live here, remember?
Jackie: (Scoffs) I was expecting to find the sitter. I actually thought you'd be in the throes at Forrester.
Katie: Well, sorry to disappoint... (sighs) but the sitter needed a few hours off, and I told her I would be happy to take over.
Jackie: Well, that's why I've come-- to spend some time with my grandson.
Katie: Oh, I'm sure he'll be thrilled to see you. Unfortunately, he's sleeping right now.
Katie: (Sighs) You're more than welcome to wait if you want. His nap shouldn't last much longer.
Jackie: Okay. Perhaps I will. (Sighs)
Jackie: (Sighs) (laughs) Oh, my, my, my. You're still eating those things.
Jackie: Oh, nothing. I-I just thought that, well, since you've snared Nicky, you would be--
Katie: That I'd give up pistachios? They're actually very good for you. Nick loves them. You know how health conscious he is.
Katie: Jackie, Nick and I may have bonded over a bowl of nuts, but we do have other things in common. I know you hate hearing that.
Jackie: I just can't accept that you're the right person for him. That's all.
Jackie: Katie, look at me. You must wonder in your heart, or shall I say, your brother's heart, just how deep Nick's feelings for Bridget still run. I know you do.
Taylor: Nick, I don't think that's a very good idea. Please.
Nick: Well, I am here to bring the truth. And the truth is I need a little help.
Nick: You got any more coffee?
Nick: Two lumps. Thanks.
Taylor: Didn't I divorce you?
Stephanie: Nick. You know, I really don't appreciate you running to Taylor about me.
Nick: How's the unpacking going?
Stephanie: What's it to you?
Nick: You know, I always thought I would love to see you desperate and lonely, but life, you know-- life is just so funny, isn't it, Stephanie? Just as soon as you think you get it figured out, boom! It just pulls the carpet right out from under you.
Stephanie: A little early to have been drinking, isn't it?
Nick: Actually, I haven't been drinking, but I do think we're gonna have something to celebrate real soon. I am here to make you an indecent proposal.
Bridget: We weren't gonna do this anymore.
Owen: Did I say that?
Bridget: I'm pretty sure we agreed.
Owen: Well, maybe we need to review that decision then, hmm?
Bridget: I'm sorry. (Laughs) I am so sorry.
Owen: (Sighs) What? Don't--don't be sorry. You can just--you can ki-- don't be sorry for kissing me. Come on.
Bridget: I hate it when girls do that though, you know? They--they-- (laughs) they fish for attention, and then they--they enjoy getting it. And then they blame the poor guy that they're getting it from. It's--I-I--it's because we're taught that certain things aren't supposed to happen to nice girls.
Owen: Like what? What? What certain things?
Bridget: Like sexual attraction.
Owen: Look, and the feeling is mutual. I think you know that.
Bridget: I do. I-I-I do. I-it's just I also know that this can't go anywhere.
Owen: (Scoffs) You see, that right there-- that's the part that I'm having trouble with.
Bridget: Owen, even if I were the type that could have a fling or a one-night stand, we work together. That's so not cool.
Owen: Fine, I'll quit my job. If that's what it takes, I'll quit it.
Owen: Look, you're not over your ex, are you?
Bridget: (Sighs) Apparently, I need to be flattened by the same train five or six times to get it through my head that Nick and I are just do-- a disaster. It's not even that I am not over my ex. It's that my heart needs a triple bypass. There's just so much emotional scar tissue that I need to learn to just live without.
Owen: Look, I've fallen for the wrong person. I mean, think--we all have.
Owen: That doesn't make you incapable of falling for the right one.
Bridget: I don't blame you if you're just totally annoyed with me.
Owen: No, I-I'm not. I am not annoyed. I just--I think that you're making a mistake. I mean, you sound like one of those people who say that I'm gonna start going to the gym after I lose 30 pounds. If you're tired of doing the wrong thing, then stop waiting for a bolt of lightning to start doing the right things. Bridget, I could be the right thing.
Bridget: (Laughs) Maybe you could. Maybe--maybe you are. And it would be just like me to stand here and tell you to check in with me in a year, you know? I hate it when people use these words, like they're so "hurt" and "damaged."
Bridget: The truth is I just have some repairs to make. It's not gonna happen overnight. Okay?
Bridget: Owen, please. I-I just need a little bit of time.
Owen: Okay. All right.
Stephanie: "Indecent proposal." Well, that'll be a first.
Nick: Who'd have thought?
Stephanie: (Chuckles) I'm not interested.
Nick: Oh, I understand how you feel after the way you've been treated.
Stephanie: And I am not interested in your understanding me either.
Taylor: Stephanie, just let him talk, and then you can shut him down.
Stephanie: Whatever he's buttering me up for I do not want to hear.
Taylor: (Sighs) Oh.
Nick: I'm a tough businessman. I think you'd be the first to admit that, Stephanie, but obviously, I have run Jackie M.-- Thank you--with my heart.
Stephanie: I didn't know you had a heart.
Nick: I'm trying to have a civil conversation here.
Stephanie: There's nothing civil about you or that mother of yours.
Nick: I see. So your loyalty is still with the man who took your money to start his company, a man who cheated on you regularly and flaunted it in your face. A man who fired you from a job that didn't pay where you took care of him and made him look better on a daily basis, a man who kicked you out of his bed and then took up with a glorified manicist. Hmm.
Stephanie: And your point is?
Nick: Well, she just won't let anybody help her, will-- you won't let anybody help you.
Stephanie: Certainly not you. In my book, you're trash.
Nick: Well, to you, I may be trash, and I may die trash. But I just might be your ticket, and you might be mine.
Stephanie: To where?
Nick: A comeback. A comeuppance to those who deserve it. You see, Stephanie, Eric may have forgotten, but I haven't, how you sent Pat Nixon that Forrester gown she wore at her husband's second inauguration, how you dined with the Shah of Iran in Cairo in 1974, and you managed to come home with the measurements of his wife and daughter.
Taylor: You did all that?
Nick: I'm curious about one thing. What--what were Eric’s last words? Was it something like, "I love you, Stephanie, but I just can't have you treating my wife and my son this way at my place of business," as if he would have even had a place of business if you wouldn't have bought it for him? You see, Stephanie... (chuckles) I don't love you. I don't even think I like anything about you. I think you're a rattlesnake. But so am I. And together, there'd be no stopping us. I want you to come to Jackie M. I want you to work with me.
Stephanie: (Laughs) You are crazy as a bedbug. Get the hell out of here, Nick, please.
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