[an error occurred while processing this directive] ATWT Transcript Thursday 6/18/09 [an error occurred while processing this directive]
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As The World Turns Transcript Thursday 6/18/09

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Provided By Eric
Proofread By Emma

Carly: Sage, shake a leg up there. Your brother's in the car.

[Doorbell rings]

Carly: Hello.

Craig: Hello to you, too.

Carly: Relax. It's seltzer water.

Craig: I didn't say anything.

Carly: Didn't have to. I'm becoming very adept at reading you.

Craig: Is that a good thing or a bad thing?

Carly: Time will tell.

Craig: I saw Parker outside. He's taking Sage to the farm?

Carly: Yeah. She's going riding with Jack. What is it?

Craig: Nothing! It's just good to see you like this.

Carly: Mm. You mean sober.

Craig: Well, if I agree, are you gonna hold that against me?

Carly: Between you and Parker, I really don't have much choice. I'm under constant surveillance around here.

Craig: That sounds like a complaint.

Carly: It's not. It isnít. I'm very happy that you're letting me handle this my own way. You're not trying to talk me into going to those meetings.

Craig: Like I said, as long as it works.

Carly: It also helps that you're not gonna tell Jack about what happened the other day.

Craig: Oh, Jack won't hear about it from me. Or from Parker, for that matter, 'cause we agreed to that. As far as I'm concerned, the less Jack knows about it, the better.

Carly: Amen to that.

Craig: Especially when things are going so well.

Carly: Oh, you -- you think things are going well, do you?

Craig: Don't you?

Carly: Um, I'll have to think on that.

Henry: And who is responsible for the tacky and tawdry -- tawdry sideshow it has become? Well, Ms. Vienna Hyatt, that's who. The appalling lewdness of that Scandinavian jezebel is bringing this show right down into the gutter.

Katie: Hey! I was watching that.

Brad: Well, I mean, you've watched it like a million times. I mean, isn't it getting old?

Katie: Never. That woman is a train wreck. I can't look away.

Brad: Okay, well, try. Look over here, to me.

Katie: When did you get here?

Brad: That's cute. [Laughter] Ah, I just -- can you believe that Kim is trying to get that woman to come on the show?

Katie: Well, controversy equals ratings, and this Geneva Swift is definitely foaming at the mouth.

Brad: There was like nudity for five seconds. It's not like it was the end of the world.

Katie: No, it wasnít. But even though you tried to cover them up, Vienna did bare her breasts on live television.

Brad: It wouldn't be a big deal anymore if that woman would just shut up.

Katie: It was a pretty big malfunction.

Brad: It was an accident! Wasn't a big deal.

Katie: Well, we think that because we know Vienna. She's our friend. We're used to her busting out.

Brad: Well, I just don't see why she has to apologize for being sexy. I mean, no one ever asked you to apologize.

Katie: Oh, yeah?

Brad: Yeah.

Katie: Prove it.

Brad: What are you doing?

Katie: I'm trying to seduce you.

Brad: Are you crazy? No. We canít.

Fan: Hey, aren't you that lady from the TV show?

Vienna: Oh, you're a fan of "Oakdale Now"?

[Laughter]

Fan: After everything that I saw yesterday, well, I am a huge fan.

Vienna: Oh, that's so sweet.

Fan: You think I can get an autographed photo?

Vienna: Of me?

Fan: Of only you, Sweetheart. I can't get you out of my head.

Henry: Really? Maybe you should think about taking a cold shower, okay, buddy? Beat it, beat it, beat it!

Vienna: Henry, that man was a part of the audience of "Oakdale Now." You can't be rude to fans like that.

Henry: I was rude? Did you hear what he was saying to you and the way he was drooling over you? That was disgusting!

Vienna: Okay, do you even hear yourself right now? You sound like Geneva Swift.

[Deep voice]

Henry: I'm sorry.

Vienna: Okay. I know you didn't mean it. Listen, I got to go to work. Do you want to walk me to the studio?

Henry: I would love to, but I'm going to pay the bill, actually. Got to take care of the bill.

Vienna: Okay. You'll watch the show, right?

Henry: Oh, baby, I would not miss it for the world. Mwah! Oh --

[Feminine voice]

Henry: Yes, hello. Mrs. Hughes? This is Geneva Swift. If you'd still like me on the show, I'm in.

Kim: Fantastic! How soon can you be here?

Henry: In two shakes of a lamb's tail.

Brad: The doctor put you on total bed rest.

Katie: Yeah, well, I am in bed.

Brad: But if we -- if we start making love, then you won't be resting. No.

Katie: Then I'll let you do all the work.

Brad: Oh!

Katie: We were never told we couldn't make love, and I miss you.

Brad: Oh -- I miss you, too. Really bad.

Katie: Well, I'm right here.

Brad: You know I want to. But I can't help it. I can't help it. I can't help it! I can't help it, 'cause I keep thinking about the baby, you know? This -- this is our little miracle in here, everything that we've been praying for. And with our history --

Katie: I know. You don't want to take any chances.

Brad: No. No, I donít. I love you. You don't have to seduce me because I work with Oakdaleís resident sex goddess, although I really do appreciate it.

Katie: Way to make the pregnant lady feel better.

Brad: Okay. I was joking. I was joking. Come on. It was stupid. You're bad.

Katie: I'm trying to be!

Brad: You are. You're bad. Oh, come on. Will you -- will you watch the show?

Katie: Yeah, yeah. TV's right there.

Brad: I'll see you later.

Katie: I'll be here. I'll be here.

Jack: I am getting you to go riding with us today if it kills me.

[Laughing]

Janet: Yeah! It just might.

Jack: Well, it's worth the risk.

Janet: Oh.

Jack: Hey!

Janet: Hi! Look who's here!

Jack: Hey, princess.

Sage: Hi.

Jack: What's with the long face? I thought you were excited about going riding today. Something happen at home?

Janet: Jack --

Jack: It's just a question.

Sage: Everything's fine. It's just now things are really weird with Craig being there all the time.

Janet: Don't you like Craig?

Sage: He's not my boyfriend.

Jack: And, Honey, that's a good thing.

Sage: I meant he's momís. Duh!

Jack: Y -- you sure about that? Because she told me just recently that she and Craig had decided to be friends.

Sage: Then why did I just see them making out?

Carly: The car's gone. So are Parker and Sage.

Craig: I guess she snuck out when we weren't looking.

Carly: It's just not like her to leave without saying goodbye.

Craig: Maybe she didn't want to interrupt.

Carly: You think she saw us kissing?

Craig: Uh, we've been a little lax lately. She could have seen us do it once or twice.

Carly: Then why didn't she say anything?

Craig: Well, maybe she doesn't think it's a big deal.

Carly: Maybe she's upset by it.

Craig: And maybe she's totally fine with it.

Carly: You don't know Sage.

Craig: Right. Well, listen, if you want me to back off, maybe not spend so much time here --

Carly: No, no.

Craig: You sure?

Carly: Yes. Uh, the last thing I want is for you to feel unwelcome here.

Craig: Okay. So how do you want to handle it?

Carly: Well, I suppose I have to face it head-on.

Janet: She's not upset! She's just mildly grossed out.

Jack: Good. She ought to be.

Janet: Hey, you're forgetting something that's very important here. Sage has had a hard time accepting the fact that you and Carly are moving on.

Jack: Yes. Okay, I know she's -- she's had her issues with the divorce. But Carly's not moving on with Craig! He's using her.

Janet: Well, then, that's her problem, not yours.

[Cell phone rings]

Jack: Guess who? Hey, Carly.

Carly: Hey, Jack. Listen, when you drop Sage off later, why don't you and Janet stay for dinner?

Jack: You're inviting us to dinner?

Carly: Was that not clear?

Jack: What I meant was why? What's the reason for the dinner? What bomb are you planning on dropping this time?

Carly: I assure you, Jack, there's no bomb. Just a little barbecue.

Jack: Really?

Carly: Yeah. I -- I thought we could all get together and celebrate.

Jack: Celebrate what?

Carly: I can think of lots of reasons to celebrate. So, are you in or what?

Jack: Sure.

Carly: Great. Well, I'll see you later.

Jack: Yeah. So, we have dinner plans.

Craig: Are you sure this is a good idea?

Carly: Why wouldn't it be?

Craig: You don't think it could be too much, too soon?

Carly: Is it?

Craig: That's a question only you can answer.

Carly: Okay, well, in that case, I think it's perfect timing. You said yourself things are going well, so what's the concern?

Craig: I guess I'm wondering about putting Jack into the mix.

Carly: Oh. No, that -- it -- it's fine. If Sage has seen us together, then I'm sure she's told Jack, and I don't want him to think I have anything to hide.

Craig: Okay, I'm gonna say something. First, though, I -- I want you to know that this is your decision. I'll back you 100% no matter what. However --

Carly: Don't worry. I'm not gonna ask you to sit next to Jack.

Craig: However, I would understand if you weren't ready to go public with what's happening between us.

Carly: Why? No, I -- I have no -- I'm not ashamed of this. I want people to know.

Craig: You do?

Carly: Sure. I want them to see how much you've helped me.

Craig: I -- I don't know what to say.

Carly: It's okay. You don't have to think of anything right this second. Hi. You're back.

Parker: Looks like it.

Carly: You drove safely, I presume.

Parker: I didn't run anyone down, if that's what you're wondering.

Craig: Parker --

Carly: Okay. It's a little funny.

Parker: What are you doing? I thought you said you were gonna stop drinking.

Carly: Parker, its seltzer water. Quit worrying about me. Now go up and get yourself cleaned up. We're having company for dinner.

Parker: Who?

Carly: Your father and Janet.

Parker: Is Liberty coming?

Carly: I don't believe so.

Parker: And you're sure you're up for this?

Carly: I'm fine. I'm looking forward to it.

Parker: If you say so.

Carly: Parker, look at me. I'm not drinking anymore, and I feel great, and I'm gonna stay this way, so get used to it.

Henry: Why are women's clothes always so difficult? Ah, just there.

[Cell phone rings]

Henry: Yeah. Hello.

Katie: Hey, it's me. What are you doing?

Henry: Uh, nothing.

Katie: Well, I'm desperate for a little company. I was wondering if you would come over. I don't know if it's the hormones or just being confined to this bed, but I'm really lonely.

Henry: Uh, gee, Katie. I really wish I could, but, uh --

Katie: No, don't say but! Say yes. Please? We can watch the show together and support each other if Vienna has another wardrobe malfunction.

Henry: Trust me, all the breasts will stay exactly where they belong today.

Katie: Oh, really? What did you do? Have a talk with them? What are you doing that's so important?

Henry: Um, remodeling.

Katie: Where?

Henry: At Metro. Some cosmetic changes.

Katie: To what?

Henry: Katie, I'm sorry. I really got to go. I'll talk to you later. Bye. So sorry, sister, but this mister has a date, and he can't be late.

Kim: Oh, good, good, good. I wanted to see you now. Our show is gonna be a little different today. We have a special guest star, and I want --

Brad: Please don't tell me. No, no.

Vienna: No, it can't be.

Kim: Oh, but it is. Geneva Swift herself.

Vienna: No, no, no. That crazy old bat is gonna be in our show?

Brad: No, Kim. Come on. I agree with Vienna here, okay? The woman's a crackpot. I mean, nobody cares what she has to say.

Kim: Well, I don't know about that. I disagree with you.

Vienna: Oh, so you agree with her? I'm -- I'm a Jezebel?

Kim: No, no! Absolutely not. But she has an opinion, and she is entitled to express it. Listen, for all we know, it could be a big portion of our audience agrees with her positions.

Brad: Well, I'm gonna give our audience a little bit more credit than that.

Kim: Okay, fine, but just remember this -- Geneva Swift is real, she is outspoken, and people love to hear what she has to say.

Vienna: Why?

Kim: Why? Well, I don't know. I mean, maybe it's because when she shows up, you're not sure what's gonna happen. It's not scripted. There's an element of surprise. Look, all I know is she brings a lot more eyeballs to the screen. And isn't that what we're here supposed to do?

Brad: And we -- we have to go along with it?

Kim: Well, if you want to continue to work here, yes.

Brad: Fine.

Kim: Vienna?

Vienna: You're the boss.

Kim: Okay. Well, don't forget it. Okay. Oh, there you are! Wonderful. We are so glad you could join us.

Henry: Oh, so am I. I am -- I have been given a voice, and I -- I will be heard.

Vienna: Oh, oh! I've heard you, all right, and I want you to look me in the eye and say all the horrible things about me to my face!

Vienna: Well, I'm waiting. Speak!

Henry: Is that what you're wearing on the show today?

Vienna: It's couture.

Henry: Is that French for "See-through"?

Vienna: Are you really gonna let her speak to me like that?!

Kim: All right. Calm down. Just stay calm.

Brad: Kim's right. Don't let her get to you. Save it for the show.

Henry: I'm sorry. It must be her perfume. I think it's best if you don't seat us so close together.

Kim: All right, all right, all right.

Vienna: Fine, fine, fine.

Kim: Listen, as you can see, we're all very -- excited to have you here.

Henry: She really should change her blouse. It looks like she's wearing nothing at all.

Kim: You know, I wouldn't worry about that if I were you.

Henry: I do.

Kim: I know. But what I'm trying to say, my point is that once we are on the air, all you have to do is state your case, and Brad and Vienna will respond. Uh, it's not that I'm asking you to hold back.

Henry: Oh, I have no intention of holding back, Mrs. Hughes. The women of the Illinois Citizens Against Nudity are depending on me.

Kim: I remember.

Henry: Yes, yes. Our moral decency is at stake.

Kim: No holds barred.

Henry: Ms. Hughes, the only bar you need to worry about is the black bar that will be running across the screen when Ms. Hyatt is on.

Kim: As many of you know, our station generated quite a buzz recently when Vienna experienced an on-air wardrobe malfunction. So joining us today is a concerned viewer of "Oakdale Now," Ms. Geneva Swift. Ms. Swift, would you be good enough to explain to our viewers your concerns?

Henry: With pleasure. I know many of you out there are watching at home with your young children, and I know that you all agree with me that what aired the other day was simply inappropriate and unacceptable!

Kim: Ms. Swift, may I ask you, do you have children?

Henry: No, I have not been blessed as such.

Vienna: Oh, that's a surprise.

Henry: But I know that if I did have children and they had been at my knee watching as Ms. Hyatt's mammary bounced up and down on the screen, their poor little eyes would have been scarred for life!

Vienna: It was an accident.

Henry: There is a time and a place for baring one's body, Ms. Hyatt. That is at night with the lights off and in the bedroom, not on my daytime television.

Katie: This woman is nuts!

Kim: I would remind you that I did explain to you, that was not intentional. That was an accident.

Brad: We were doing the tango. It could have happened to anybody.

Henry: I think some of my moral friends would disagree.

Brad: Okay, well, let me show you.

Henry: Show me what?

Brad: How it could happen.

Henry: Oh, I don't think so.

Brad: Oh, come on! You might even enjoy it.

Henry: That is rude and suggestive! And I am hardly dressed to dance.

Brad: Please, Ms. Swift. Let's just try it. Come on.

Henry: You watch your hips, young man.

Brad: Really, no problem. Whoa. Okay. You're pretty light on your feet.

Henry: Mother was a fan of the June Taylor dancers ooh. Oh, my.

Katie: Oh, my God. Henry has got to see this.

Brad: That -- that's how it's done.

[Applause]

Kim: Uh, wonderful. Well-done. Well-done, Ms. Swift. Now I'm sure you can see that doing the tango can be quite challenging physically, and you must be able to understand how the accident could have happened.

[Katie calls Henry on her cell phone and Henryís cell phone rings when heís on the show and Katie sees this on the TV]

[Cell phone ringing]

Operator: The caller you are trying to reach is unavailable. Please leave your message after the beep.

[Cell phone beeps]

Katie: No way. Oh, my God. Is that -- it is. That's Henry.

Sage: We're home.

Carly: Oh, hi! How was your ride?

Sage: It was awesome. Daddy said next time, Janet can come with us.

Janet: Oh, don't hold your breath.

[Laughter]

Carly: Sweetheart, why don't you go and get cleaned up, okay? It's almost time to fire up the grill. Well, thank you both for -- for coming.

Janet: Thank you for inviting us.

Carly: My pleasure. Uh, Parker, would you help me bring out the hors d'oeuvres.

Parker: Sure.

Jack: Hors d'oeuvres? Wow. You're really going all-out.

Carly: Just cheese and crackers.

Craig: Going upscale today. Anybody like a drink?

Jack: You really think that's wise?

Craig: Iced tea, seltzer water, and Sage's favorite, very cherry soda.

Janet: I will take an iced tea, thank you very much. Jack?

Jack: I'm all set, thanks.

Craig: Well, if you change your mind --

Jack: I know where the glasses are, Craig.

Craig: This must seem a little strange for you to have me practically hosting in Carly's house.

Jack: Trying to black it out.

Janet: So, Carly seems happy.

Craig: I think we're both happier than we've been in a long time.

Jack: And I think she was asking about Carly, not you.

Craig: And Carly's doing just fine, Jack. She's had some major challenges lately, but personally, I believe the worst is over.

Jack: Let's hope so.

Carly: Will you put that cheese in the fridge, please?

Parker: Sure. What is that?

Carly: Well, I told you, its seltzer water.

Parker: No, what you just added to it.

Carly: Bitters.

Parker: Bitters?

Carly: Yeah, bitters. Just adds a little flavor. We all set?

Parker: Yeah.

Carly: Jack, I -- I just want to say something. Um, once again, I'm -- I'm so happy that you're here. And, um, I just wanted to let you know that I know that we've been through a rough time lately. And believe me, I know that it's mostly my fault. But I feel like I'm finally on the other side, and I'm very hopeful that things will continue to get better.

Jack: So are we.

Carly: You've been very patient with me, all of you. And I thank you, especially you, Craig.

Craig: You don't have to thank me.

Carly: I do. You've gone above and beyond to help me, and you've come to mean a great deal to me. So thank you.

Craig: My pleasure.

Carly: A toast, then, to family and good friends.

Craig: Hear, hear.

Parker: Mom, could you come in here for a minute?

Carly: Back in a flash. What is it, Sweetheart?

Parker: You lied to me.

Carly: What are you talking about?

Parker: There's alcohol in here, Mom.

Carly: No, there's not.

Parker: That's why you've been feeling so good. It's because you're drunk!

Katie: I can't believe he's doing this! What is Henry thinking?!

Henry: On the contrary, Ms. Hughes, I think the dance just proved my point.

Brad: Which is what?

Henry: That it can be done without exposing oneself. Therefore, the problem here is obviously Ms. Hyatt!

Vienna: Me?

Henry: Yes, you. You and your flagrant sexual displays are ruining what was once a wholesome, decent show.

Brad: It's not like she comes out here every day and does a striptease. I mean, it was a tango. What happened happened. She apologized for it. It won't happen again. I just don't understand why you're making a federal case out of it.

Kim: Brad --

Brad: No, no, no. Kim, I mean, we've -- we have done sexual stuff on the show before. So I don't understand why you're coming down so hard on Vienna now.

Henry: Well, it's because I --

Vienna: Well, I'll tell you why.

Kim: Oh, no.

Vienna: Because she is -- she's a jealous woman. She -- yes, that's what she is. She's a sad, lonely, old, jealous woman.

Henry: Well, I never!

Vienna: Never? Never? Oh, my. That might be the other part of your problem.

Brad: Vienna --

Vienna: No, no. She is just -- she just can't stand that I have a healthy sex life and -- and she has what? A goldfish? Or maybe two, huh? Yeah, Ms. -- Ms. Swift, you -- you -- you need to loosen up a little bit and -- and be more comfortable in your own body.

Henry: Kindly don't talk about my body, please.

Vienna: You know, I used to be a professional masseuse, and so I can easily show you how to relax.

Henry: No, no, no. I don't think so.

Vienna: Right here, you have a very sensual trigger point.

Henry: No, no, no! Ms. Hyatt, please. I am not that kind of lady.

Vienna: I barely touched you.

Henry: Jezebel!

Kim: Ms. Swift, wait a minute. We're still on the air.

Henry: Ms. Swift is over and out of here.

Kim: Well, we'll be back after this commercial.

Katie: Oh, Henry, you are so busted.

Carly: Parker, I don't know what you're trying to do.

Parker: I just want you to tell me the truth.

Carly: I did! Its -- its bitters. It's just -- it's flavoring. That's all.

Parker: Mom, I've read the label. It's 40% alcohol.

Carly: What are you talking about? Oh, my God. You're right.

Craig: You know, I should go check on the grill.

Jack: Why don't I give you a hand, if you don't mind?

Craig: Not at all.

Janet: Are you sure that's such a good idea?

Jack: Sage, why don't you tell Janet about that project you're working on for extra credit?

Janet: Oh, boy. Sounds good.

Craig: What's on your mind there, Jack?

Jack: Nah! Just want to know what's going on with you and Carly.

Craig: She didn't make that clear already?

Jack: So you're living here now? Is that it?

Craig: No, no. I'm not living here. I spend the bulk of my time here, but given Johnnyís schedule, that means overnights are out. But Carly and I have --

Jack: Okay, you know what? I really don't need the details, thank you.

Craig: Sorry, but you asked.

Jack: She seems to be doing better. Back to her old self.

Craig: I guess all she needed was a little attention, understanding.

Jack: What I care about is her drinking.

Craig: We have a strict no-tolerance policy here.

Jack: And she's abiding by them?

Craig: She's the one who threw all the booze out of the house. We keep open the lines of communication, and basically, I just offer her support, encouragement.

Jack: I just want to make sure that we're on the same page.

Craig: Are we?

Jack: Yeah, I guess.

Carly: Parker, I swear to you, I had no idea.

Parker: It's right on the label, Mom!

Carly: Well, I didn't read the label!

Parker: Why not?!

Carly: I didn't think I had to!

Parker: Give me a break.

Carly: No, you give me a break! I made a mistake!

Parker: That's what you always say, Mom.

Carly: Do you think I'm lying to you?

Parker: No, I think you're lying to yourself. You keep acting like everything's okay now, but it's not! Nothing's changed.

Henry: God. How do they breathe in this stuff.

[Cell phone rings]

Henry: Hello.

Katie: Hey, it's me. Can you come over?

Henry: When? Right now?

Katie: Please.

Henry: Is -- is something wrong? Is -- is it the baby? Have you talked to Brad?

Katie: No, uh, the baby's fine. It's something very important though, so hurry.

[Henry sighs]

Brad: I'm really glad that's over.

Vienna: Do you think I was rude to Geneva? I didn't mean to chase her off.

Brad: Oh, come on. Are you gonna tell me there's not a part of you that wasn't glad to see her fade away into the sunset?

Vienna: Well, maybe a little part, but what do you thinks' gonna happen to her now?

Brad: Who cares?! She's had her 15 minutes! I mean, hopefully, we'll never hear from her again.

Kim: Well, you're gonna hear from her a lot sooner than you think. I plan to make Ms. Swift a regular part of the show.

Carly: Parker, I'm telling you, I had no idea. Why won't you believe me?

Parker: 'Cause I donít.

Craig: Whoa, whoa, whoa. What is this?

Carly: Nothing. It's a misunderstanding.

Parker: Really, Mom? What don't I understand? Here.

Carly: Parker!

Parker: She's been putting this in her drinks.

Craig: You've been putting bitters in your seltzer water?

Parker: Yeah, and she's acting like she didn't even know that there was alcohol in there.

Carly: I didnít.

Craig: How could you not know? You can only get this at a liquor store.

Carly: Stop acting like I've done something wrong purposely! I -- I didn't know there was anything in there.

Craig: Really? You mean after all this time today, you didn't realize you were getting drunk?

Carly: I thought I was getting better. I was feeling better.

Craig: No wonder it's been so easy for you to go cold turkey. I should have known better.

Carly: Why? Because you can't trust me? I told Parker what I was doing. If this was some big secret, why would I do that?

Craig: 'Cause maybe you slipped up.

Carly: No. Look, I didn't mean for this to happen, so it's okay. I'll just start over.

Parker: Start over, Mom? You never stopped. You canít.

Carly: Stop it. You are not allowed to speak to me that way.

Jack: What's going on?

Carly: Parker and I were just having a slight disagreement. That's all.

Jack: About what? Parker?

Parker: I wanted to go to a concert tonight. Mom said no.

Jack: Seemed pretty heated for a concert.

Craig: Oh, that was my fault. I made the mistake of taking Parker's side by pointing out that tonight isn't technically a school night for him anymore.

Jack: "Siding with Parker." That's a really tough habit for you to break, isn't it?

Craig: I'm working on it.

Jack: Good. Anyway, what your mom says goes. Therefore no concert.

Parker: Whatever.

Carly: Okay. Craig, is the grill ready?

Craig: Yeah. Should be.

Carly: We should get cooking.

Craig: Let's go.

Jack: Nah, nah, nah, nah. Not so fast. I want to know what's really going on here, guys?

Craig: What, do you think there's some sort of a conspiracy here, Jack?

Jack: No, I think something's just not sitting right with me.

Craig: Jack, it's a party. Try and relax. Enjoy yourself. You coming?

[Jack sighs]

Kim: Do you know that the phones have not stopped ringing since the show aired?

Vienna: With complaints?

Kim: No. They want more of her. Which means I want to give them more of her.

[Vienna clears throat]

Vienna: I think you're making a terrible mistake.

Kim: How could that be a mistake? I mean, the more viewers we have, the better off we are.

Vienna: So it's official?

Kim: Well, as soon as I can make sure that she'll accept the offer, you got it.

Brad: Well, great. I mean, if she has any sense left at all, she'll say no.

[Henry breathing heavily]

Henry: Katie? Bubbles, are you okay? I got here as soon as I can. Are you all right?

Katie: Oh, my God. Did you see the show today?

Henry: The what? The show? No, no. Uh, I was at the diner.

Katie: I thought you said you were going to Metro.

Henry: Yes, Metro. But then the diner and then here, which is why I'm completely out of breath. I'm exhausted. I own too many businesses. Mwah!

Katie: Yeah. Must be tough trying to be in more than one place at a time.

Henry: Yeah, yeah, it is. Sometimes, I don't even know where I'm at any given moment.

Katie: Or who you are.

Henry: No, I -- no. I always know who I am. W -- what's the hubbub, Bub? Why'd you get me over here so fast?

Katie: I really want to talk to you. I am very worried about this Geneva Swift woman.

Henry: Why?

Katie: You should have seen her today. She was attacking Vienna, calling her all kinds of names. It seemed very -- personal.

Henry: Oh, poor Vienna.

Katie: Yeah, poor thing. She was humiliated.

Henry: Well, I mean, come on. If it was that bad, Kim would have stopped the show.

Katie: Yeah, I couldn't believe she didnít. Geneva was being downright vicious.

Henry: Well, maybe she had a point.

Katie: And what would that be?

Henry: Just Vienna's -- very exotic. She's very sexual. And I don't know if people want that in, you know -- in their rooms or their living rooms in the middle of the afternoon. There are kids home at that time of day, you know?

Katie: Wow. That's weird.

Henry: What?

Katie: That's exactly what Geneva said. How would you know that?

Henry: What else would this woman say to my liebchen?

Katie: One can only imagine.

Henry: I am thirsty. I'm parched. Do you want something? I'm gonna get a glass of water. You want anything?

Katie: Uh, just that, uh, wastebasket over there.

Henry: Okay. What's the matter? You, uh -- you're not feeling well?

Katie: I feel fine, Geneva.

Jack: I am going to miss you, Pumpkin! Mwah. Craig?

Craig: Jack.

Jack: You ready to go?

Janet: Yep. Sure am.

Jack: This was nice. Thank you.

Carly: You're welcome.

Sage: I'm gonna go upstairs.

Carly: Sure. Okay.

[Carly sighs]

Carly: Well, thank you all for not ratting me out to Jack.

Parker: Like it matters.

Carly: Parker --

Craig: No, he's right, Carly. It wouldn't have mattered. It's clear that Jack isn't the problem here.

Henry: How did you know it was me?

Katie: Like I've never seen you in a dress before.

[Henry sighs]

Katie: I was the one who called your cell phone.

Henry: That was you?!

Katie: Yes, and that's when I realized why you're doing this -- because you're jealous of Vienna.

Henry: Oh, I am not jealous of Vienna.

Katie: Of the attention that she's getting. You don't like how everybody, including Brad, is starting to realize how sexy she is. And you want to get her fired so it'll stop.

Henry: I do not want to get her fired. I just want to see her neutered a little bit. That's all.

Katie: Do you know how petty that sounds?

Henry: You don't know what it's like, Katie!

Katie: Thanks.

Henry: No! Everywhere she goes, people stare at her -- at the diner, out in public. They look at her like they know her, in a biblical sense.

Katie: You're doing all of this because of something that lasted less than five seconds on the air.

Henry: That you can watch on UsTube again and again and again. Yes, I have seen it.

Katie: Why are you doing this to yourself?

Henry: I'm not -- I'm not the only one here. Is it fun watching Brad and Vienna cavort on TV? Admit it. Watching her do your job is getting under your ever-expanding skin. I know you, too, you know?

Katie: Okay! Yes, I can't wait for it to be over, either.

Henry: Thank you.

Katie: But this isn't right what you're doing to Vienna! What about when she finds out that you're Geneva Swift, that you're this woman that's been saying all of these horrible things about her and has apparently launched a statewide movement to get rid of her?

Henry: Well, she's never going to find out about it.

Katie: How do you know?

Henry: Because you're not going to tell her, or Brad.

Vienna: Now that Geneva Swift is going to be part of this show, do I have to start dressing like a nun?

Kim: A nun? Why? I mean, I want you to stay yourself.

Vienna: Good, good, good.

Kim: Actually, you could probably be a little more provocative if you wanted to.

Vienna: Really?

Kim: Yeah. Well, yeah. It would give her more to react to.

Vienna: I like that idea.

Kim: Really? Well, if you like that idea, I've been thinking about having you take some classes in pole-dancing. I mean, how do you feel about that?

Vienna: Oh, well, I wouldn't need any classes in pole-dancing. Maybe a refresher course. I could -- I could practice with Henry. He'll be thrilled!

Katie: Henry, you can't ask me to be quiet about this.

Brad: Oh, good! You're both here. Did you see the show?! Did you see it?! Did you see it?!

Katie: I'm sure Henry feels like he lived it.

Brad: Oh, well, listen -- be glad that you didnít. That old battle-ax -- she's a piece of work, isn't she? And the way she went after Vienna.

Henry: How is Vienna? Is she okay?

Brad: Yeah, yeah. She's -- she's fine. Me -- I mean, I just -- I just wanted to -- I wanted to deck Geneva Swift in the mouth. And I would have if she wasn't a woman.

Henry: Well, thank goodness you're so chivalrous.

Brad: Next time I won't be so chivalrous.

Henry: What do you mean "Next time"?

Brad: Check this out. Check this out, okay? This is the best part. Kim thinks she's fantastic.

Katie: She does?

Brad: Wants to make her a regular part of the show.

Katie: What?!

Henry: You're kidding.

Brad: I wish.

Henry: Well, it looks like Ms. Geneva has connected with part of your audience.

Brad: Whatever. I mean, Kim is delusional if she thinks this is gonna work.

Henry: I don't know. Maybe this so-called interloper could give you a run for your money.

Katie: Or maybe she'll be smart and turn Kim down.

Brad: I doubt that.

Henry: I guess Geneva won't be silenced until her message is heard.

Janet: Here you go.

Jack: Thanks.

Janet: So, why are you so quiet? You've barely said two words since we left Carlyís.

Jack: Sorry.

Janet: Seemed like you had a good time. You went outside. You did the manly grilling thing with Craig. Nobody was burned, or scarred, or poisoned.

Jack: True.

Janet: Carly seems to be doing okay. She wasn't drinking. She seemed happy.

Jack: I thought so, too.

Janet: What do you mean? What happened?

[Jack stammers]

Jack: I kind of walked in on something between her and Craig and Parker in the kitchen.

Janet: And?

Jack: I -- I don't know. They gave me this song and dance about a concert Parker wanted to go, and Carly wouldn't let him go.

Janet: So what's wrong with that?

Jack: I have a feeling there's more to it than that.

Janet: Oh, no. Jack, please, don't go there. Don't start looking for trouble.

Jack: I'm not, Janet.

Janet: Yes, you are! Why can't you just accept the fact that things are okay for once?

Jack: Hey, listen it's not that I don't want to!

Janet: Then do it. Just do it, okay? Otherwise, you're gonna drive yourself crazy. Whatever's going on over there is working. So just let this go. Please? Let it go.

Carly: I can do this. I can quit. I -- if you don't believe me, look. There. You see? It's gone. I don't need it. Parker -- Parker, please don't walk away. Parker!

On the next "As the World Turns" --

Margo: Did something happen to your watch?

Riley: I think Casey may have taken it.

Alison: This isn't a contest.

Casey: W -- well, Riley's turned it into one. Choose, Mom. Me or him.

Jack: Did you also see your mother in the driver's seat of that car that almost hit Craig?

Craig: The last thing you need is more stress. Lying to Jack is just gonna put pressure on you, and that's the kind of pressure that can put a drink right back in your hand.

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