All My Children Transcript Monday 8/5/13
Aired on OWN on 9/10/13
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Opal: Come on. Oh, my. Well, here we have one of the scions of the Chandler empire Mr. JR Chandler himself, with the lovely Dr. Cara Castillo. Mwah, mwah!
Opal: You look like a million bucks. Give us a twirl, honey. Show us your dress. [Gasps] Oh, my. But I'll bet it would be quite a surprise for our viewers to learn that up until just recently, this handsome hunk here was in a coma. Talk about your miraculous recovery. Look at you! Look at you!
Opal: Yes, a real specimen of male pulchritude, if you ask me. I bet the two of you are gonna be hoofing it up on the dance floor tonight.
JR: Oh, absolutely we are.
JR: I just want to give a special thanks to this incredibly beautiful woman. I mean, not only is she an amazing doctor, but she's an incredible therapist, and she inspires me to get better every day.
Cara: You know, he's actually just being modest, because I have never seen a patient who is so determined to get better, so if anyone is an inspiration, it is you.
Opal: Oh, my.
Brooke: Oh. [Chuckles] Thank you. I don't look nervous?
Dimitri: [Sighs] What I see is a beautiful, confident woman heading up a gala charity event to launch Chandler's new online network -- bingo.
Brooke: I hope it goes well. I mean, tonight could impact on the whole Chandler future.
Dimitri: You have done everything possible to make it a huge success.
Brooke: Well, I couldn't have done it without you, Dimitri.
Dimitri: I think you could accomplish anything you want once you've set your mind to it.
Brooke: Oh, here. What is it about men and cuff links? Uh, there.
Stella: For you, Miss English.
Brooke: Oh. Thank you. [Chuckling] Thank you, Stella. [Sighs] "My dearest Brooke, congratulations on what I know will be a ringing success. I only wish I could be there to share it with you. Love, Adam." [Chuckles] I wish he could be here, too.
Zach: Okay! Why don't you put the gun away. You're about to shoot someone.
Lea: I almost did. What the hell are you doing breaking into Jane's?
Zach: Why don't you -- down, please. What -- what are you doing standing guard at Jane's?
Lea: My job. What the hell is your excuse?
Zach: Miranda forgot her shoes and -- ah! She needs them for the gala, so I thought I'd get them for her.
Lea: You committed a felony to get your niece's shoes?
Zach: It's my niece and shoes, so I had to, and I didn't know they were closed early.
Lea: Ever occur to you that you should call first?
Zach: But I didn't again, because I didn't know. But what are you doing here?
Lea: Mm, there's been robberies and break-ins in the neighborhood.
Zach: So the FBI decided to send their best agent to check it out?
Lea: Mm-hmm. Yep.
Zach: Well, that makes sense. All right, well, since you're in rare form, Special Agent Marquez, I'm sure you're gonna arrest me, but I would appreciate it if I could deliver these shoes to Miranda first. Really?
Zach: [Sighing] Oh, God.
Opal: Well, if it isn't Colby Chandler just back from an extended tour of Europe on the arm of the ex-con and dastardly Dr. David Hayward. What brings a couple like you to a charity event?
Colby: You mean other than the fact my family's sponsoring it?
Colby: Free booze. [Chuckles]
Opal: Oh. [Chuckles]
David: And not to mention the chance to be seen in the Pine Valley society pages, huh?
Colby: [Blows a kiss to the camera] Actually, I planned the gala, and I think it's a total hit, if I say so myself. Did you hear that we have Jason Derulo?
Opal: I did hear that.
Opal: And, uh, kudos to you on that count, Colby.
Colby: Well, it pays to have connections. If it wasn't for me, there'd be nothing but turntables and some speakers in this place.
Opal: Well, I'm sure that Mr. Derulo's performance will be one of the highlights of the evening.
[Billy Clyde sneaks around and imagines]
Opal: And here we have one of Pine Valley's most prominent and distinguished citizens... Mr. William Clyde Tuggle. In fact, I don't think we've seen such an influential member of Pine Valley society since my late husband, Palmer Cortlandt, graced this locale. You remind me so much of him.
Colby: And there's also a really hot bachelor up for auction. I'm not gonna miss making my bid on him.
Opal: Oh, really? What about your date, here? You wouldn't want to be two-timing Dr. David. Everybody knows what happened last time he was at Chandler Mansion and somebody lit his fuse.
David: Oh, I'm pretty sure your online viewers are much more interested in what I'm currently up to, Opal, as in the biosensor I'm developing with Cortech, with your son Petey as a partner, I might add. I'm sure to save hundreds of thousands of lives.
[Camera shutters clicking]
Colby: Ohh. [Gives David a kiss on the cheek]
Dimitri: What the hell is Colby doing with David Hayward?
Brooke: Hoping that word gets back to her father, I'm sure. And if it does, Adam will hit the roof.
Opal: Well, if this isn't Pine Valley's most eligible bachelor. He is sharp as a tack. He's successful as all get-out and, ladies, he's hotter than a two-fisted firecracker, not to mention his mama's pride and joy.
Pete: Oh, good think you're not biased.
Pete: You look beautiful, Mom, as always, right?
Opal: Oh, thank you. Good thing you're not biased, mister. Now, why don't you tell our viewers just what you have been up to since your auspicious return to Pine Valley? I understand that things are just hopping over at the newly rebranded Cortlandt Electronics.
Pete: Yeah, it's an exciting time at Cortech. We have plenty of new developments in the works, and, uh, a lot of job openings that are going to be popping up. And once production begins in the Hayward biosensor, it's really gonna rev up the area's economic recovery.
Opal: [Gasps] I'm sure our president is gonna be wanting to thank you for that, huh?
Pete: Should be.
Opal: But now, speaking of revving up, there is a whole tent full of ladies who are chomping at the bit to bid on a date with you later this evening. Now, do you have any ideas at all as to who that lucky girl might be?
Pete: Not a clue, but I am single, so I'm sure whoever it is, we will have an awesome night.
Opal: Oh, I'm sure you will.
Pete: I'll catch you later.
Opal: All right.
Opal: [Gasps] Oh, and who are these cutie patooties? This is AJ Chandler. He's the son of JR Chandler -- lots of initials in this family.
Opal: And who is this lovely cream puff you've got on your arm?
AJ: Uh, this is Heather.
Opal: Heather. Oh, I just love your gown.
Heather: Thank you.
Opal: Would you mind telling us who you're wearing?
Heather: It's vintage. I got it at the thrift store.
Opal: You did? Oh, my -- not only is she pretty, but she's a bargain huntress, as well. I think this one's a keeper, AJ.
Opal: Now, you two get on in there and have yourselves a good time, all right?
AJ: Thanks, Opal.
[Camera shutters clicking]
Lea: I wanted to talk to you, but you've been avoiding me.
Zach: So you're gonna hold me hostage?
Lea: If I take them off, you promise to listen to me?
Zach: I'm listening.
Lea: [Removes handcuffs]
Lea: What happened with Jesse -- I, um -- I wish I could have filled you in, but I couldn't. I-I-I took an oath.
Zach: I'm still listening.
Lea: [Sighs] I guess what I'm trying to say is that I'm sorry. There -- there was something good happening between us. Even if I put the brakes on, I -- I just hadn't felt like that in a while.
Zach: Me neither.
Lea: Any chance of a do-over?
Zach: [Sighs] Just because something feels right, doesn't mean that it is right. We're too different, you know? I'm glad we stopped.
Lea: But I just stopped, because I didn't think that you were ready. Look, I-I know that you didn't like what happened with Jesse, but I had the charges dropped. I mean... that should count for something.
Zach: Yeah, it does -- did. It doesn't change the fact that you didn't trust me enough to involve me with Jesse. I could have helped you. And you know what that reminds me of? Reminds me of Kendall. That's what drove a wedge between us. She didn't trust me, wouldn't let down her guard. She pushed me away. I didn't like that. I didn't like it then. I don't like it now -- not with you, not with anyone.
Heather: Look at you, girl -- ready to rock it out on the red carpet.
AJ: All right.
Miranda: Thanks. I think I'm just gonna sneak around the back, though.
AJ: Why would you do that? Are you okay?
Miranda: Oh, um, yeah, I left my shoes at Jane's. These ones look terrible, but, oh, my gosh, look at yours. They look amazing.
Heather: You don't think they're too much?
AJ: Nah. Come on, both of you. You both look awesome.
Miranda: Says the guy who'd rather be wearing flip-flops with his tux.
AJ: Don't hate.
Miranda: [Chuckles] This is all really cool.
Heather: Totes. Did you hear that Jason Derulo's playing? I can't wait. Also, I hear he has a...
Opal: [Speaks indistinctly] And here we have Mr. Mitch Morrison. It's always a pleasure to see you, Mitch.
Mitch: Likewise, Opal. Looking lovely as ever.
Opal: Oh, thank you. But no lovelier than your exquisite wife, Diana. Hello, dear. [Chuckles] And your handsome son, uh, uh, Hunter, right?
Opal: Well, I know that you're a major investor in Chandler's new online network, so this must be a very exciting evening for you.
Mitch: It is. Online's the future of entertainment as we know it, and I couldn't be more excited to be in on the ground floor of this venture.
AJ: You better watch yourself, Morrison. You're on my turf now.
Hunter: Like I care. My dad's bankrolling the whole thing. I'll do whatever the hell I want. You look really hot in that dress.
Heather: What did that jerk say?
AJ: I'm gonna go break his teeth.
Miranda: No, no, no, no. He didn't say anything.
Dimitri: It's lovely.
Brooke: Oh, it is.
Dimitri: May -- may I?
Brooke: Oh. [Chuckles] Mm.
Dimitri: It's even lovelier on.
Brooke: [Sighs] Well, [Chuckles] it would be very inappropriate if I bid on it, but if I could...
Brooke: I'll see you in a little bit.
JR: Excuse me for a moment?
JR: Hey. Everything okay?
Cara: Terrific. Um, Oliver's tucked in bed. Abuela's reading "The Dinosaur's Shoes" for like the fourth time. I don't know who's enjoying it more.
JR: Okay, good. Now maybe you can relax and enjoy the party, hmm?
Cara: Right. [Sighs] Sorry.
JR: Well, how about we celebrate our mutual happiness? Can I get you something to drink?
Cara: Uh, yeah. I'd like champagne.
JR: Okay. I'll be right back.
David: You never fail to surprise me, Cara.
Colby: [Chuckles] Good luck tonight. Your reel's gonna kick butt. Preferably Brooke's.
JR: Ah, well, thank you for the support, even if showing up with Hayward was a bit of a slap in the face. What's going on with that, anyway?
Brooke: That's exactly what I'd like to ask. What were you thinking, Colby?
Colby: I know how you enjoy playing queen bee at Chandler, but let's be clear -- you're so not the boss of me.
Brooke: Well, boss or not, I don't appreciate you generating negative publicity for Chandler Media just to get a rise out of your father.
Colby: As usual, Brooke, you're overreacting to something that is none of your business.
JR: For the record, I don't trust her with Hayward any more than you do.
Colby: How's PV's most eligible bachelor?
Pete: [Chuckles] Just hoping I don't regret agreeing to do this.
Colby: You won't. You're gonna bring in oodles of cash.
Pete: Here's to hoping so.
Colby: Mm. You're hot. Own it. I mean, who knows? Maybe you might find your one true love.
Colby: It happens. [Chuckles]
Pete: I heard you're here with David Hayward? What's up with that?
Colby: Just keeping everyone on their toes.
Pete: Just be careful yours don't get crushed.
David: You seem a bit on edge.
Cara: Oh. [Scoffs] It's -- it's all the craziness here, you know?
David: That much?
Cara: Yeah. It's -- yep.
JR: Here you go.
Cara: Thank you.
David: Already off the wagon, I see.
David: Excuse me. I'm gonna get some fresh air.
JR: That really was just soda water, by the way.
Cara: I know. I'm -- I'm -- I would -- I mean, come on, please. Never in a million years did I think David would show up here -- here, in this house -- at a party here in this house. Do you understand this? I wouldn't have agreed to have my son here, because if he finds out how he's close he is, do you know what he'll do?
JR: Cara, he's not gonna find out.
Cara: Do you know?
JR: Cara, he's not gonna find out, okay? I promise you that, okay?
Cara: Thank you.
Miranda: Oh, I think I'm gonna pass this time.
Opal: Sweetie, the center is named after you. I wouldn't be doing my job if I didn't at least get you to tell me who you're wearing. Now, come on. Grab your date and meet me around the other side. Come on.
AJ: Come on. I'll take you.
Miranda: No, you can't. You already walked. I'll look like an even bigger loser if you repeat for me. But I can't walk this thing without a date.
Zach: Well, you don't have to -- your date's here.
Zach: Come on. Put these on first, though.
Miranda: Really? [Squeals] Thank you!
Zach: Sure. [Chuckles]
Heather: Oh, my God, he's like her Prince Charming -- glass slipper and everything.
AJ: You do know that's her uncle, right?
Heather: Oh, that does not matter. He is so hot.
Zach: All right, you've got to lead. Uh, red carpets make me nervous.
Miranda: Oh. I got your back. [Chuckles as she flings her old shoes over the hedge]
Billy Clyde: Ow! [Groans]
Opal: Well, Ms. Dixie Martin, how does it feel to be the new head honcho of the Miranda Center?
Dixie: Well, obviously, I'm incredibly honored. The Miranda Center is an amazing place. We've been very lucky so far. Just recently, we received an incredibly generous donation from an anonymous source. We are so grateful for this gift that will touch so many people's lives.
Opal: Oh, that's marvelous.
Singer: Take things up and raise the bar, break the mold, I'm a shooting star
Hunter: Looks like your girlfriend's batting for the other team. Maybe you should give it a try.
Brooke: So far, so good.
Dimitri: A first-class party, Ms. English. I'm eager to hear the crowd's response to the sizzle reel.
Brooke: Yeah, me, too.
Dimitri: You feeling a little guilty about making the back-up reel in case JR screws up?
Brooke: I hope we don't have to use it.
David: Hey, baby doll.
Colby: I wondered what happened to my sexy date. My lips were feeling a little lonely.
David: Yeah, about that -- I think it's time we cool it.
Colby: Mm. Don't tell me you're dumping me.
David: No, I just think we accomplished what we set out to do. We had some fun. We made some waves, and I'm pretty sure that Adam's gonna be royally pissed when he finds out that you came with me.
Colby: Double entendre.
David: Yes, I think he's gonna be doubly pissed, especially if he finds out how many times you did that.
Colby: The night's still young. Any particular reason why we stop now?
David: No, I think that we, uh -- you know, we did what we came to do, and your heart is obviously with someone else. Maybe mine, too. So, still friends?
Colby: I'd prefer allies.
David: All right.
[Camera shutters clicking]
Singer: You're gonna know my name tonight.
Opal: Auction time. Can't keep the people waiting. Come on, love bug.
Singer: Break the mold, I'm a shooting star. I'm gonna take, take, take the world tonight
Opal: Come on, folks. It's time for the auction.
Opal: Um... is this on? Oh. Uh, ladies and gentlemen, could I have your attention? [Whistles]
Opal: [Sighs] Well, that's better. So, ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the Chandler Media first annual gala to benefit the Miranda Center! Whoo-hoo!
[Cheers and applause]
Opal: We have got a lot of great stuff in store for you tonight, so fasten your seat belts, 'cause it's gonna be a wild ride. We're gonna start with the live auction! Are you ready?
Opal: Our first item is none other than a date with Pine Valley's most eligible bachelor. Whoo-hoo!
[Cheers and applause]
Opal: And guess who he is -- my gorgeous son, Peter Cortlandt. Have you ever laid eyes on such a beautiful bachelor before in your lives, huh?
Opal: All right, so, ladies -- do you want to tell them what they're bidding on?
Pete: What you see is what you get -- yours truly for a night on the town. First, I'm gonna pick you up in my brand-new convertible, and then we're gonna head over to a five-star restaurant for dinner -- any one of your choice. And then after that, who knows?
Opal: Uh, I'll know, mister.
Pete: Of course.
Opal: So, ladies, tell me -- what is it worth to you? Shall we start the bidding at $500? Let's move over here. $500 there. I got $500. How about $600? $600? Oh. No. Uh, $600. Good. Okay. Uh, do I hear $700? Uh, $700! Great. $700. How about $800? $800? Somebody? Over there? $800? Do I hear $900? Who can give me $900? Here we go -- $900, right over here.
Colby: That witch won't call on me. Bid for me.
David: He's not exactly my type.
Colby: Allies, remember?
Opal: This kind of enthusiasm or demand.
Evelyn: Are you interested? I think that your guardian would certainly foot the bill. I mean, it's a very good cause.
Celia: Sorry, what did you say?
Evelyn: Sweetheart, do you want to bid on Peter Cortlandt?
Celia: Uh, no. No. Pete and I aren't together anymore. Someone else should enjoy the date.
Opal: Whoo! Whoo-hoo!
Opal: Well, we're at $5,400. Everybody done? $5,400 going once. $5,400 going twice.
Dimitri: Wait, wait, hold on! I just got a bid via the phone for -- whoa -- $10,000.
Opal: Oh, my gosh.
David: Sorry, sweet lips. That's a little too rich for me.
Opal: Well, then, I guess it's $10,000 going once. $10,000 going twice. Sold for $10,000 to... uh, well, I-I don't know who.
Dimitri: I do. I do. I do. The winning bid goes to...
Dimitri: ... Celia Fitzgerald!
Celia: That's not possible. I-I didn't bid.
Colby: What the hell are you trying to pull? You weren't even bidding. You have no idea what you just did.
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