All My Children Transcript Monday 8/5/13
Aired on OWN on 9/9/13
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Opal: Oh, I can't believe that the painters would choose this of all days to come!
Pete: Mom, I told you it was no biggie for you to get ready here.
Opal: Oh, and I appreciate it, honey, but I really am trying not to violate the mother/son boundaries.
Pete: [Scoffs] Don't worry, you haven't.
Opal: Yeah, well, and I won't. But I only have 0800 hours to get camera-ready, and you know, the gala waits for no man!
Pete: Mom, you're gonna be spectacular.
Opal: [Sighs] Well, unless I choose the wrong shade or -- or if I say the wrong thing, which has been known to happen!
Pete: You are going to own that red carpet! You understand?
Opal: Oh, I so appreciate your confidence in me, honey. I really do. And I just, you know, it's like, it's not just that I have to get through this night or get through a job! I feel like my whole future is at stake! I mean, you said it yourself, you know, you are grown. You've got a life of your own. Your daddy's gone. Tad is MIA for Lord only knows how long. My best gal pal -- she's gone wild in Hollywood. So, it's time for me to live my own life! And I want to live it large!
Pete: You know I am your number-one fan.
Opal: I'll always have my Petey. Oh! Mm!
Evelyn: It's finally here!
Celia: [Gasps] Oh, my gosh! I can't wait to try it on! You're going to love it!
Evelyn: You're going to be the belle of the ball!
Celia: Oh, my God!
Celia: It doesn't fit! It's all wrong!
Evelyn: Well, it can't be that bad! Oh, my!
Celia: This is a disaster! You can fit two of me in here!
Evelyn: Hold on.
Celia: Oh, I have to, or it'll fall down.
Evelyn: [Grunts] We can -- we can fix this.
Celia: By tonight?!
Evelyn: Yes, most definitely by tonight!
Celia: You know, Colby and I were together when Yvette took my measurements. It took forever! She wrote every single one down! How could this have happened?
Colby: Okay. You take care of the swag bags. Catering. Got it? You take care of the music, and make sure it doesn't suck. Okay, guys. Time is ticking. Go!
Cara: Excuse me. Hi. Is JR here, 'cause we got a session?
Colby: Oh. See if you can drag him away from the computer. He was locked away all last night working on the Chandler Media reel to see if he can prove his "spot" at Chandler.
Cara: Well, it is all he ever talks about.
Colby: Yeah. Well, at least, he's doing something instead of hoping if he says "Pretty please," she'll play nice.
Cara: He's in recovery mode. You've got to cut him some slack.
Colby: [Scoffing] Yeah. I thought I'd never say this, but I actually miss the old JR. Sure, he was a son of a bitch, but at least, he wasn't a doormat.
Cara: Okay, he's been in a coma for five years.
Colby: And he's awake and needs to snap out of it. I mean, it's so embarrassing the way Brooke has his balls in a jar. The old JR would have kicked her ass out by now and enjoy doing it.
Dimitri: Oh, you -- you are making the new media reel. I thought JR was gonna handle that?
Brooke: Uh, he is.
Dimitri: Uh... Yeah, I got it. You're doing a backup in case he screws up.
Brooke: I wish you wouldn't put it that way, all right? I -- you know, I, uh -- I want to trust him. I know he's working very hard, but this is too important.
Dimitri: I know... the press, investors, competitors -- all eyes are gonna be on Chandler Media. That means there's zero room for anything less than flawless.
Brooke: Well, I just -- [Chuckles] I just hope that, you know, it's silly for me to even be concerned. What I want more than anything is for JR to surprise us and come through with something amazing.
David: Oh, hey! Good morning!
AJ: Good morning.
David: You two going to the gala tonight?
AJ: Yeah! Best party in town.
Miranda: Are -- are you coming?
David: As a matter of fact, I am. Uh, Colby -- she invited me. [Chuckles] Yeah, I know. It's crazy. But your aunt -- she's kind of a fun girl.
Miranda: Won't it be, um, you know, a little hard for you to go back... since last time there was a party --
David: My daughter was killed. Yes. It's not my first time back, but it'll always be difficult when I go there, yeah! How are you two handling this?
Miranda: You know, I just hope that this party is so great that people can just start erasing all the bad memories.
David: Yeah, I'm all for erasing the bad memories, but I'm never gonna forget my daughter. I think the difficult part for me is the fact that JR is out there partying and living the life of a free man. I'm sorry, AJ.
AJ: I get it, okay? A lot of people hate my dad, but you want to know something? I swear to God he's changed. He's not that guy anymore.
JR: [Sighs] Injects himself on his back side]
Dr. Anders: [Sighs]
Dixie: Who's that? Sorry that was intrusive.
Dr. Anders: Yeah, it was.
Dixie: I've never seen you smile, not even a little bit, before.
Dr. Anders: You're late.
Dixie: I'm sorry! A patient needed extra time.
Dr. Anders: That's why doctors put time limits on therapy sessions.
Dixie: Have you ever been to therapy, Doctor?
Dr. Anders: That's irrelevant. Whether it's a therapy session or an X-ray appointment, the only way to stay on the schedule is to stick to the allotted time.
Dixie: You know, I asked you here because I wanted to talk about Cassandra, okay?
Dr. Anders: What's to talk about? I-I did the procedure. You know, the abortion's complete. She can go home. She's released.
Dixie: No, she can't. She's not emotionally ready.
Dr. Anders: Emotion has nothing to do with it! The fact that there's no medical reason for her to be here! This is a hospital, not a spiritual retreat.
Dixie: That girl has been through hell!
Dr. Anders: Yeah, and it's not over.
Dixie: No, it's not, which is why she needs more time!
Dr. Anders: Agreed, but not here.
Dixie: Haven't you ever been through something traumatic, Doctor? I mean, can't you comprehend what it's like for this girl, who can barely get through the next day, let alone the next hour? Is it so impossible for you to imagine that this girl -- all she wants to do is die?
Dr. Anders: Yeah! I have! I got to go!
Dixie: Why? Because you're afraid to be human? You're afraid if you open up, you're gonna expose and deal with what's clearly still with you, or do you think you're one of those omniscient healers who's all above us mere mortals?!
Dr. Anders: Because I can't. Because if I go there, I'm afraid I won't be able to come back. I mean, I almost didn't come back. [Chuckles dryly] For months, I-I-I was frozen. I couldn't move. I didn't eat. I didn't sleep. [Chuckles dryly] Then, one day, I just decided that I must still be alive for some reason -- that if I couldn't save one life, maybe I could go out there and save as many lives as possible to make up for that one life, maybe, you know?
Dixie: Except you forgot to save the one life that you're gonna need the most -- your own.
Dr. Anders: Look, I got to go.
Dixie: I have time if you want to talk.
Dr. Anders: [Slams door shut]
Miranda: Hey! Save it for the guests!
AJ: [Speaks indistinctly]
Jane: If you could take the boxed-up trays to the van, that'd be great.
AJ: No problem.
Miranda: I think it's so cool that you're doing the desserts for the gala!
Jane: Cool and nerve-racking. I've never catered for such a big event before.
Jane: Mmm! But these rock, don't they?
Miranda: They do.
Jane: If you want anything, take it for later, 'cause I'm closing up early.
Miranda: Oh! Okay.
Jane: Your order will be up in a minute.
Lea: Oh, no problem.
Zach: Hey. Missy. Found your shoes in my car. You may need them tonight.
Miranda: Oh, my God! Thank you, thank you, thank you! Uncle Zach bought me the coolest shoes you have ever seen in your life! You are the best!
Zach: Save me a dance.
Miranda: I will! And I'll even try not to step on your toes.
Miranda: Oh. Thank you so much for the idea about my hair. I'm definitely gonna do it up.
Lea: Sure. I would love to see what it looks like. Take a pic! Instagram me.
Miranda: I think I will.
AJ: Miranda! Are you gonna help or what, huh? Hey, Zach.
Miranda: I'll be right there.
Lea: Are you excited about the party?
Miranda: Um... Yeah.
Zach: You okay?
Miranda: Yeah, it's just. You know, um... last time there was a party at the Chandlers... I know everything's fine now. It's just... I mean, with everything that happened, and Marissa being gone, nothing's ever gonna be the same.
Zach: Okay. It's okay.
Cara: You are making amazing progress, by the way.
JR: Oh, feeling better every day.
Cara: Because you're on a schedule, and you're not pushing it, and you're getting results.
JR: Well, I couldn't have done it without you.
Colby: Carmen, the cook, is amazing! Ah, this is a protein shake. Looks like you could use it.
JR: Oh. Yeah. Always looking out for me, huh, sis?
Colby: Mm, always. Come on. I want to show you the plans for the gala. Yeah, her grandkid's so cute.
Cara: Oliver? Yeah.
Colby: Yeah. It sucks what happened to the parents.
Colby: [Chuckles] At least, he has a cool granny to take care of him. Carmen is the best.
JR: [Clears throat as he pockets one of Cara's prescription forms]
Colby: So what's so important you couldn't just come over to the house. There's kind of a lot to do.
Celia: My dress came.
Colby: Great! So did mine. [Scoffs] Please tell me there's more to this convo.
Celia: It doesn't fit.
Colby: Maybe you and your flannel jammies should stop hoovering cookies down in the middle of the night, or are you a potato-chip kind of gal?
Celia: Yvette took my measurements.
Colby: So get pissy with her and leave me out of it.
Celia: My dress is a disaster because of you!
Colby: [Scoffs] So I had nothing better to do than go down to Yvette's store and screw up your dress? Yeah, that makes total sense.
Celia: You changed my measurements.
Colby: You're a flipping head case.
Celia: I just -- I just want to know why! Is it because of Pete you're so jealous?
Celia: Because for all the noise you make about how he's so into you, and you're the next big super-couple, he swears that you're not together.
Colby: Pete's secretive about his sex life.
Celia: You're full of it.
Colby: Poor virgin's crushing on a guy she can't have.
Celia: I broke up with him.
Colby: 'Cause you can't handle it.
Celia: [Chuckles] If he's so into you, then why do you get so ticked off every single time he talks to me, and every single time he looks at me? And... he looks at me a lot.
Colby: Believe what you want, but Pete's got the scratch marks on his back to prove it.
Pete: Hey. Everything okay?
Colby: Go ahead, Celia. Tell him all about it.
Cara: Hey. Oliver wants to play with you again. I hope you don't mind.
JR: Oh, no, not at all.
Cara: He's really taken to you.
JR: Well, he's an amazing kid.
Cara: Thank you... again and again, for bringing my son here and my mother, because having him with me every day is a gift, and I will forever be grateful.
JR: Well, parents should never be apart from their children, okay? Nobody knows that better than I do.
Cara: Do you think I made a mistake... telling David that I had an abortion?
JR: Where's that coming from?
Cara: I know he's done some horrible things, but, you know, I see his sensitive side. I see the way he mourns the loss of his child. I see that he could be a really good father.
JR: You know what? The David that played you five years ago... is playing you now. Don't make him second-guess your decision. Hey, Oliver is safe. And we're gonna keep it that way. Okay?
Cara: Okay. Thank you.
Cara: Thank you for everything. Okay.
Opal: Oh, Brooke, I just can't tell you how much this opportunity means to me! I mean, Opal on the red carpet! It's so thrilling!
Brooke: Oh, you're going to be a natural!
Dimitri: A whole lot of eyes are gonna be watching you, girl!
Opal: I know. I'm kind of nervous, but I promise you, I'm gonna wow the viewers. And none of that, you know, Joan Rivers, snarky, kind of, uh, treating people like chicken guano -- No, I won't do that.
Dimitri: [Laughing] All right. Thanks for keeping it classy, Opal.
Opal: What -- what -- what is he doing here?
Brooke: Oh. I have no idea, but the last thing we need is trouble, and that's usually what David brings.
Dimitri: I'll take care of it. David! What's it been, a thousand years?
David: Dimitri Marick. Is this you coming back from the dead a second time?
Dimitri: I keep popping up! What can I do for you?
David: I'm just here to make a sizable donation on behalf of Cortech and myself.
Dimitri: Well, that's very generous of you. Is there... a catch?
David: [Laughing] A catch? Simple charity, Dimitri. The Miranda Center is very important to this community and close to my heart, as well.
Dimitri: Thank you.
David: You're welcome. Wow! You guys have really gone all-out, huh?
Dimitri: Yep! It's going to be quite a night! Sorry that you won't be attending.
David: Oh, I'll be here. I wouldn't miss it for the world.
JR: What the hell are you doing here?
David: Just passing through.
JR: Well, don't let the door hit you.
David: Party at the Chandlers -- hmm. Just like the old days.
JR: Oh, shut up!
David: Well, let's hope that you learned how to play nice this time.
JR: You know, tonight is a very big night for Chandler Media.
David: [Chuckles] Yeah, so I've heard. Too bad they're never gonna let you anywhere near that company.
JR: You know, you have absolutely no idea what you're talking about!
David: Should I be worried? You gonna bring a gun to this party, too -- shoot the place up?
JR: Get out of here!
David: What? Isn't that textbook, spineless JR. If he doesn't get what he wants, he sets out to kill everyone?
JR: Just shut the hell up!
David: There he is -- the old JR, in the flesh.
JR: Get out of here!
David: Why? We were just getting reacquainted.
JR: You say one more thing one more thing to me, I swear to God, I'm gonna --
David: What? You gonna shoot me?
Brooke: JR, we need the reel. Everything okay?
David: Yeah, everything's fine, Brooke. We're just going over the bad old days. I'll see you at the party, JR. Make sure you lock up all your firearms.
Miranda: How do I look?
AJ: Just -- wow.
AJ: You look amazing.
Miranda: You don't think it's too much?
AJ: Too much? No! My God! You look perfect!
Miranda: Um, look at these shoes. I, uh -- I was so busy loading the fan that I forgot my other ones at Jane's. These ones look terrible.
AJ: No! Are you kidding me? The way you're dressed, no one's gonna notice your shoes.
Miranda: Uh, you clean up pretty nice yourself.
AJ: Vintage. No, really, you think so?
Miranda: [Chuckles] Mm-hmm.
Heather: I'm here! Oh, my God. The party's insane. You! Totes adorable!
Miranda: [Chuckles] Thanks!
AJ: What? Oh.
Heather: Yeah. Okay. We're gonna do selfies. Ready? I'm gonna post them.
Miranda: Um, hey, I'll just -- I'll meet you guys downstairs.
Heather: So... do you really like it?
AJ: What? Oh, no! Oh, my God! You look amazing!
Pete: Celia. Hey. What's going on? Why'd you just run off like that?
Celia: It's nothing.
Pete: Okay, I don't believe that.
Colby: She said it's nothing! She seems sincere. Why not believe her?
Celia: Colby and I just had a disagreement about the gala, and I left because I didn't want you to get in the middle of our tension.
Pete: Okay, well, I appreciate that, but next time, you can give a guy fair warning before you just ditch him in the park.
Colby: [Scoffs] Hello? It's not like you were alone. I was there.
Celia: Yeah, I know. I'm sorry. I just feel like the pressure of this gala is getting to me, and -- and... there's just a lot riding on this, you know?
Colby: It's only the event of the year, and it's all on me. That's what you get when you hire newbies who don't know what they're doing.
Pete: Okay, well, I am sure you'll make it a success.
Colby: Aww, you're so sweet! [Giggles as she kisses Pete on the cheek]
Pete: Well, I better let you guys go back to the event of the year. I'll see you tonight.
Celia: All on you. Really?
Colby: I made most of the design decisions, hired the caterer, coordinated every aspect of this party, because Brooke's too busy playing mistress of the universe with my family's company.
Celia: Mm. [Scoffs]
Colby: You know, you could have made a big deal about your dress to Pete. What's up with that?
Celia: The blame game is more your style than mine, Colby.
Colby: Such a good little girl. Hurry -- somebody give her a gold star.
Celia: You know, I'm not gonna apologize for being a nice person. But I'm not stupid, and I know exactly what you are.
Colby: Then try to keep up. Hope your dress works out! Not.
David: You two having a little throwdown?
Colby: [Sighs] Little Miss Sunshine is beyond irritating, and a lot smarter than she looks.
David: Mm-hmm. Well, never underestimate the nice ones. They have a tendency to take us down when we least expect it.
Colby: [Chuckles] That's so not gonna happen.
David: I ran into JR earlier.
Colby: Hmm. No bruises, no blood?
Colby: You guys must've been civil.
David: He mentioned something about... a reel?
Colby: To promote Chandler Media. We're showing it at the gala.
David: And JR's in charge of putting that together. Impressive.
Colby: The only one JR wants to wow is Brooke. I can't believe she's letting him try. I bet you he begged her. Way to suck up for the job.
David: Well, as long as he stays away from handguns.
Colby: The new JR doesn't do anger, but if this reel rocks, that's JR's way back into the company. If not, I don't even want to think about it.
JR: You're gonna love this.
Brooke: I can't wait to see what you've done.
JR: It proves I'm back, Brooke. And I can be a valuable asset to Chandler.
Evelyn: Great news! It's fixed!
Celia: What? That's amazing! You're amazing!
Celia: You are a total fairy godmother.
Evelyn: Oh, sweetheart. Listen, I know you're very busy here, so I'm going to take it upstairs, put it in a room, so you can get ready.
Celia: That would be great. Thank you so much!
Evelyn: Uh, Celia, darling... I want you to have a wonderful time tonight.
Celia: I think I will. [Chuckles]
Dixie: Oh, my gosh! Celia! Are you okay? Oh, honey! Ohh.
Lea: Freeze! [Points gun at Zach]
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