AMC Transcript Wednesday 3/10/10

All My Children Transcript Wednesday 3/10/10

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Episode #10328

Provided by Suzanne
Proofread by Gisele

Brooke: Adam!

Adam: What are you doing? You can't stop the transfusion! J.R. will die!

Dr. Kahn: Get him an amp of epi I.M. Let's ventilate him.

[Monitor beeps rapidly]

Adam: Breathe, son, breathe!

Marissa: What happened?

Colby: Dad --

Adam: Come on! Come on, son! Breathe!

Marissa: No, J.R., no.

Tad: Come on, J.R., fight.

Dr. Kahn: It's not working. Get me a laryngoscope and an E.T. tube.

Adam: What are they doing?

[Monitor flatlines]

J.R.: I want to stay.

Dixie: J.R.

J.R.: You can't make me go back.

Dixie: No, maybe not, but somebody else can.

Dr. Kahn: We need to open his airway. We're losing him. Close the blind, please.

[Monitor flatlines]

Marissa: This can't be happening.

Adam: This transplant should be saving J.R.'s life, not costing him his life.

Brooke: Adam, you have to be calm for J.R.

Adam: My son is dying.

Brooke: You have his son and your family to stay alive for.

Adam: I'm fine. I'm fine.

Brooke: For a man who has a heart condition and a pacemaker.

Adam: She should be in bed.

Brooke: Things aren't tense enough?

Adam: Yeah, she looks pale. Maybe --

Brooke: It's all right. No, you stay here with J.R., and I'll go see her. Ok? Scott, will you look after Adam?

Scott: Yeah.

Annie: Hey! So much for the spa, huh? I did go to the spa, though. It was a great spa. But I was doing my downward dog, and I lost my balance, twisted my knee.

Brooke: I know you're J.R.'s donor.

Annie: Adam told you?

Brooke: Let's discuss this somewhere else.

Tad: Angela, they stopped the transfusion.

Adam: Yeah, get in there and save my son.

Jesse: It's gonna be ok. He's a tough kid.

Tad: She's here. I can feel it.

Jesse: Who? What?

Dixie: You're incredible, you know that? You think heaven just revolves around you?

J.R.: You're trying to get rid of me.

Dixie: Honey, I miss you more than I can say.

J.R.: They why are you trying so damn hard to send me back?

Dixie: Do you see yourself? Didn't you always say that you never, ever wanted to be anything like your father?

J.R.: I am nothing like my father.

Dixie: Selfish? Self-centered? You think everything revolves around you, that you should always come first?

J.R.: Do you hear yourself? Do you forget what you did to me?

Dixie: No, of course not. I didn't forget.

J.R.: It was always about you. It was about what you wanted, to hell with everybody else. When I was at my darkest, at my lowest, where were you? You were off fooling around with Hayward, off to Europe. No, you left me. You left Tad and my sister. You were too bothered to even keep Kathy.

Dixie: J.R., that's not really fair. I thought I was gonna die.

J.R.: Did you try to do the right thing? Did you call Tad to ask him if he could raise her or let me know that I had a sister? No. You just gave her away.

Dixie: You're right, ok? I made mistakes.

J.R.: And after you finally realized that you were ready to come home, you died on me.

Dixie: I never stopped loving you.

J.R.: Between your love and Dad's love and -- there's no doubt that's why I'm a total mess: Struggling to hold on, an alcoholic.

Dixie: So what? So the world did you wrong, so you get to die hurt and angry? Is that it? You know, your whole life hasn't been horrible. Not everybody's hurt you. In fact, I know somebody that's never hurt you, somebody that loves you, that needs you.

J.R.: A.J.

Damon: Where you headed, tough guy? You know, it's kind of cold out there.

Opal: Sugarplum, what the heck are you up to? Sweetie pie? Ohh. Sweetheart, where is it you want to go at this hour?

A.J.: I want to go see my daddy.

J.R.: I'm sorry.

Dixie: Oh, baby, don't apologize. And don't fight it. Just feel it, and don't run away.

J.R.: No, this hurts too much.

Dixie: I know it hurts. It hurts to live, it hurts to love, but that doesn't mean you should give up.

J.R.: I thought it wasn't supposed to be sad up here.

Dixie: You're still connected to them, so you feel what they feel.

J.R.: Don't you?

Dixie: No, not anymore.

J.R.: You don't feel anything?

Dixie: I do. I feel love. I feel so much love. I send my love, and I know when it's been received.

Tad: Jesse, I've been thinking a lot about Dixie lately. Actually, it's more than thinking about her. It's like I feel this -- pull. It's kind of hard to describe. It's like she's with me. I mean, not necessarily physically with me, but she's just everywhere. She's -- she's in this hospital. She's in this chapel. Last time I walked in here, I did it because I thought I heard her singing. I could've sworn it. And then when I came in, there was a hymnal open right there, right there to the same song. Am I going crazy?

Brooke: Annie, you should really get back in bed.

Annie: I can't believe Adam told you I'm J.R.'s donor.

Brooke: I saw you. He just confirmed what I realized. You did a wonderful thing for J.R.

Annie: You'll tell everybody.

Brooke: Well, you almost told everybody, you know, thinking it was such a great idea to observe everyone.

Annie: Nobody saw me.

Brooke: I saw you. And Adam saw you, and he's already upset enough and so is the rest of the family, so they don't need any more surprises.

Annie: Have you always been this great family protector, or is this something new since you started bunking with my husband?

Brooke: Some of those people have been family or like family for a lot of years. They're going through hell, and I will do anything to make things easier for them, and that means making sure that you keep to your plan and keeping you under wraps.

Annie: "Going through hell?" Did something else happen? J.R.'s getting my transfusion, right?

Brooke: Apparently, J.R. had a bad reaction.

Annie: No.

Brooke: They're trying to stabilize him.

Annie: Oh, my God. Oh, my God, this is horrible. J.R. can't die. He can't.

Brooke: Annie, they're doing everything they can.

Annie: And what if it doesn't work? What if J.R. dies? Everybody's going to blame me.

Adam: How is he?

Angie: J.R. went into anaphylactic shock. He's on medication to help correct the reaction, and he's also on a ventilator.

Marissa: What now?

Angie: We'll have to wait and see if he responds to the medication, and if he does, we will resume the transplant.

Scott: And if he doesn't?

Angie: Listen, J.R.'s condition has deteriorated severely, and he may not have the strength to pull out of this.

Marissa: There's got to be something that you can do.

Angie: If there is anything that you want to say to J.R., now would be the time.

Brooke: What's happening to J.R. is hardly your fault. Annie, I think you should get back into bed.

Annie: Since when has it mattered if something's my fault? These people like to blame me for everything. They all thought I murdered Stuart. I'm sure they would just love to blame me for murdering J.R.

Brooke: Nobody is loving anything. You did a fantastic thing. You helped when J.R. needed it.

Annie: I did it for Adam. How else am I gonna prove to him how much I love him, that I would do anything for him? Oh, my God, if J.R. dies -- see, this always happens to me. Everything is so close to being perfect, everything's just the way it's supposed to be, and then everything goes to hell.

Brooke: I think you're missing who's really in trouble here.

Annie: Adam will blame me. He'll be so angry. What if he stops loving me? What if he divorces me? Oh, my God, I'll lose everything! See, why does this happen? I'm just trying to do something right. I'm just trying to be a part of this family. I belong here. I deserve this. I'm not gonna let somebody take it away from me!

Brooke: Will you stop already?

Annie: Oh, you're just loving this, aren't you?

Brooke: We're in a hospital. J.R. is critical.

Annie: I knew it. You didn't come back for "Tempo." You came back for Adam. You want him.

Brooke: What?

Annie: Everybody knows you don't need the money! You don't need the job. But husbands? Husbands: Those are hard to find, especially at your age, and you are after mine.

Brooke: Oh, I've already had him.

Annie: Yeah? You want him back.

Brooke: Well, I try not to repeat myself.

Annie: That's why you were in such a rush to move into the mansion.

Brooke: Adam insisted I stay.

Annie: You are trying to get into Adam's bed.

Brooke: Oh, Adam's bed is the last place that I want to be.

Annie: Well, then move out. Adam doesn't need you. He has me, ok? Adam is mine. You can't have him.

Brooke: You are more desperate than I thought.

Angie: We will all still need to take precaution: Wear protective clothing. And we've added a germicidal light setup to minimize against contaminants.

Adam: You go back in there and fix my son, or I'm gonna take away your job as chief of staff. I'm gonna take away your license and every other damn thing you care about.

Krystal: Adam.

Angie: I know how hard this is.

Adam: No -- like hell you do.

Angie: Adam, listen. Please, just let go of this anger, because J.R. needs you, needs his family now more than ever.

Colby: No, no, no.

Marissa: How do I say good-bye?

Dixie: J.R., come and sit, listen.

J.R.: To what?

Dixie: To the people that love you. They're saying their good-byes. You need to listen to them. You need to hear what they have to say, even if it hurts.

Scott's voice: I remember when we were kids, and you would always ask me what it was like to be a grownup. Like I had the answers: I was only a few years older than you. You couldn't wait to take on the world, cousin, and you did. We love you, J.R. and whatever you need to do, we're with you.

Colby's voice: Crazy, huh? Me not knowing what to say? Even when you busted me for stealing Babe's wallet, I still had an answer. [Sobs] No, J.R., you can't die on me. I need you! You're the only big brother I have! No, no, I can't do this!

J.R.: I've never seen Colby like that.

Dixie: Well, maybe it's because you've never really seen her.

J.R.: That's not true. I love her.

Dixie: Really? J.R., you've been so involved in your own dramas. You put her on the shelf most of the time -- the cute kid sister who gets into scrapes -- but you figure "Oh, you know, she'll be ok." It's pretty sad that it's not until she's saying her good-byes that you really see her and see how much she loves you, how much she needs you.

Jesse: J.R. is Dixie's son. It makes sense that she'd be on your mind right now.

Tad: That's just it: She's not on my mind. It's like she's --

Jesse: Like she's --

Tad: Oh, never mind. It's just --

Jesse: What? Like she's moving with you?

Tad: Ok, great, we're both nuts.

Jesse: No. All those years without Angela, there were times, Tad, where I would swear that she was right there -- lying next to me or right there walking next to me -- and it turns out that's all I needed. Just like right now all you need is Dixie, and she is here for you, Tad.

Tad: Man, I just --

Dixie: I miss you, too.

Annie: I am not desperate. I just love Adam, and I don't want to lose him.

Brooke: Believe it or not, I understand.

Annie: Right.

Brooke: No. I was a lot like you. You know, I was never satisfied. I needed more -- I needed to be loved, I needed to be needed, and I worked really hard -- and all I did was end up screwing up my life and anybody who got involved with me.

Annie: You're like the church lady: There's no way you ever did anything horrible.

Brooke: Oh, when I came to town, I had two boyfriends, one wild, one nice -- Benny and Dan -- and I pitted them against each other so that I could feel loved, and it ended up blowing up in my face. And you know what? When my aunt wanted me to leave town, I blackmailed her so that I could stay.

Annie: You blackmailed your own aunt, huh?

Brooke: Mm-hmm. And I'm not proud of it. I just thought that I had to do whatever I had to do in order to be loved, and, you know, she loved me despite the tactics.

Annie: Thanks for the confessional.

Brooke: Annie, all I'm saying is, is that if it's true love, you don't have to have games or plots or schemes. You need to trust the love. Well, that's the end of the sermon, and I should let you rest.

Annie: Wait. I don't want to make any more mistakes.

[Door slams]

Damon: Yo, what's going on? You're freezing.

Colby: J.R.'s dying.

Scott: Talk to J.R., Uncle Adam. You need to be with him.

Adam: No, I will not say good-bye to J.R. I will not let go of my son.

Dixie: Adam has done everything humanly possible to hold on to you over the years. I'm not surprised he's not about to give up now.

J.R.: My father and I have been at each other's throats for so long. This year I decided to finally give up, and then he found out that I was sick and everything changed. But you know my dad: When he loves, he loves big.

Dixie: That's what fathers do. Right?

J.R.: Yes.

Marissa: What's this?

Opal: Somebody woke up and wanted to see his daddy, wouldn't take a "no" for an answer.

Marissa: I know you really want to see your daddy, but he's still asleep.

A.J.: I can wake him up.

Opal: I know that your grandpa is awake, and I bet he would be thrilled to see you. Why don't we go see him.

Krystal: Let's do that. Come on, let's go give Grandpa some sugar, all right?

Angie: Does A.J. want to see his daddy?

Marissa: How do I tell him that J.R. might not wake up?

Angie: You know, when I had to tell Frankie that his father died, it was the hardest thing I'd ever done. He had so many questions.

Marissa: What did you do?

Angie: I answered his questions honestly.

Marissa: How do I do that without totally falling apart?

Angie: If A.J. sees you feeling sad, then he's going to know it's ok for him to feel sad.

Marissa: Jesse came back to you.

Angie: Yes, he did against all odds.

Marissa: So it's still possible that J.R. will come back to me.

J.R.: I never got a chance to give Marissa a proper honeymoon. I promised her "happily ever after," and all I ever gave her was "in sickness." She carted me off to doctor's appointments and therapy sessions and group sessions. Even when I felt so sick I had to crawl into a ball, she never complained.

Dixie: That's what people do when they love you.

J.R.: But it was always about what I needed. I never realized that Marissa needed so much. And the parents that raised her -- they're dead, and now I'm leaving her A.J. And A.J. -- he lost his mom not too long ago. And I promised him that I'd always be there for him.

Dixie: Well, he's a lucky little boy. You know, he has a big family. He'll never be alone.

Krystal's voice: You've had your share of problems, but your heart has always stayed strong. I remember when I first met you: Cocky, self-assured handful of brass, but crazy in love with my baby doll. And for a long time I wasn't sure if you were the best thing that happened to her or the worst, but the way you loved each other and that little boy of yours finally convinced me. Pure gold. If this is good-bye, if you have to leave us, then I know your heart is gonna find its way back to Babe. You're gonna find peace together.

J.R.: Babe? Babe? That's Babe, isn't it? That was Babe. She looked just the way that I saw her on the pier in San Diego, just the way I remembered. Oh, I wasted so many days, so much time when she was alive, and I loved her. God, I loved her so much. I want to stay. I want to stay with Babe.

Dixie: Because you loved her?

Marissa's voice: I love you, J.R., and I miss you. A.J. does, too. He's here. He wants to wake you up. You can't die, J.R. Do you hear me? I want to be strong for A.J., but if you leave us, I don't know how I'll do it without you. I know that you're tired. You've been in so much pain for so long. But I love you. I want a life with you. I know it's gonna take a miracle, but I'm going to wait for that miracle.

Annie: Adam's my shot at love, family, home -- all the things I never had -- and I want those things for Emma, too. My family, they pretty much wrote me off when I was a little girl. My first marriage was a complete disaster. And Ryan -- I thought Ryan loved me, but, really, the only thing we ever shared was Emma. And then there was Adam, and Adam loved me for me. He didn't care about my past or my previous mistakes. So, yeah, I guess sometimes I come on a little too strong and try too hard, but it's just because I don't want to screw it up.

Brooke: If it's love --

Annie: Oh, it is love.

Brooke: Then maybe you don't have to try after all.

Annie: But I have Colby constantly trying to undermine me. I have J.R. trying to convince Adam he has to choose between his family and me.

Brooke: It's not easy joining the Chandler family. You almost have to earn your place. But if, as you say, Adam loves you, and if you really love him, then maybe you have earned it.

Annie: That's what I thought, but I can feel him slipping away, and I can't let that happen.

Brooke: Adam just lost his brother not long ago, and he could lose his son.

Annie: You know, it would be just like J.R. to die on me -- ugh -- so Adam would blame me, and I end up on the street.

Brooke: You know, maybe you could focus on Adam instead of thinking about yourself.

Annie: I always focus on Adam.

Brooke: I think you're thinking about keeping Adam. Scott told me about Adam's heart problem and his pacemaker. You know, I think you should worry less about whether Adam loves you or how much and worry about him.

Annie: I do.

Brooke: Good. Then you should stay in bed and, you know, get healthy and get strong so that you can help Adam through whatever is ahead for him.

Annie: I just want to be by his side every step.

Brooke: Then you'll just take care of him. You know, you'll make sure he takes his meds, that he eats right, that he gets enough rest.

Annie: I know how to take care of my husband, thank you.

Brooke: All right, I'm gonna go check on J.R. and see how he's doing. Are you ok?

Annie: Yeah. I'm better now.

Brooke: I'm glad we talked.

Annie: Me, too.

Annie: "Better make sure he takes his meds, eats well, gets some rest." I don't need your advice, English, I need you gone.

Angie: J.R. is still on the ventilator, and until he's breathing on his own, we're in a holding pattern.

Tad: Well, when will that be?

Angie: I think you need to spend time with him.

Adam: Hey. I don't want you saying good-bye to my son. All right? He's always loved you like a father, always listened to you and given me the deaf ear. Well, I hated you for it. But don't say "Good-bye." Just tell him to get ready to fight! Fight for his life, fight to live. He'll listen to you.

Colby: The doctors, they -- they told us to say good-bye to J.R. I couldn't do it. I hate seeing him like that: On machines. I mean, he can't even breathe on his own. I'm horrible, aren't I? I should be there for J.R. I should be there for our family. Instead -- instead I ran.

Damon: Finally: This is something I'm an expert at. It feels right when you're doing it, huh, but not so right when you realize that the stuff you ran from isn't actually gone.

Colby: Yeah. Uh, Bailey?

Damon: And Stuart. When I found out Bailey was pregnant, I was out of there. And then once I finally tried to make it right, I couldn't. I don't know if I ever will. If I could do it all over again, I would just stick it out -- deal.

Colby: Yeah.

Damon: You going back?

Colby: Uh, yeah. Yeah.

Damon: Give me your cell. Here. I'm speed dial number 44 if you need me.

Liza: Oh, Colby. Honey, I've been looking everywhere for you.

Colby: Mom, take me back to the hospital.

Liza: Come on, let's go.

Colby: Thank you.

Brooke: I'm sorry.

Marissa: I know you want to wake Daddy up, but he's really sick. The doctors are trying to help him, though.

A.J.: Is Daddy gonna die like Mama?

Marissa: We don't know, honey. We just don't know.

J.R.: She's amazing, isn't she?

Dixie: Huh. Yeah, she is. J.R.?

J.R.: I used to think living was just about getting through.

Dixie: And now?

J.R.: There's so many things I have to do, so many things that I have to fix. All my life I thought it was how much people loved me, if they could give me enough love, or what they could do for me, not what I could do for them. I spent so many years just being angry at my father, thinking that he wasn't giving me the love that he should. He loved me, but instead of accepting it and returning it, I made his life hell.

Dixie: Adam has always been very proud of you.

J.R.: Oh, because I'm his son. Not because I'm a good human being.

Dixie: Oh, I think A.J. might disagree with that.

J.R.: Oh, A.J.'s so young he doesn't know how many times I haven't been there for him.

Dixie: Now, you're being a little hard on yourself.

J.R.: No, I'm not. I'm seeing myself for the first time. All the anger and self-pity and the drinking -- that's not the father that I want to be. What about Colby? Her brother's been AWOL. And Marissa -- I made her all these promises that I never keep. And Tad. Tad has been nothing but a rock to me, and I'm so wrapped up in my own life I never have a chance to ask him about his own. I have to fix this. I have to make things right. Can I?

Tad: You know, since you've been in here, I've been thinking an awful lot about your mother lately. Actually, more than thinking about her. The truth is half the time I turn around I expect to see her standing right in front of me. When she passed away, I swore that I would always be there for you. I just hope I've been there enough. Because I still miss Dixie every single day, I don't want to have to miss you, too. You're with her, aren't you? That's why she feels so incredibly close. Well, so be it. Dixie, if you can hear me, J.R. listens to you, so you tell him. You tell him he's needed here. His son needs him, his wife needs him, Adam needs him, and I need him. There's no way he is done yet. You tell him that.

Dixie: Come on. That's what I'm trying to do.

Tad: It's bad, Dixie, and you know it. We can pray all we like, we can make all the deals with God that we can. I'm coming to you. And I'm begging you don't take him. You send him home. Send him back. I know how much you love him, sweetheart, how much you would love nothing more than to keep him there with you, but he's just started being the man he can be. He's just finding his way. And he's taken so many hits and he's lost so much. And I know there's a part of him that wants nothing more than to stay right where he is: With you. But losing you almost killed him. Don't do that to A.J.

Adam: Could I have everyone out of the room, please? Yeah, there's your dad. Yeah, let's see how he feels. Go feel that hand. Hey, J.R., we -- this is where you belong, buddy. This is what you're fighting for: Your family, your son, the fight of your life. So you got to fight hard, fight for life. Ok? Come back to your son.

A.J.'s voice: Daddy, wake up.

Tad's voice: Send him home, Dixie.

A.J.'s voice: Daddy, can you hear me? I love you.

[J.R. coughing]

Adam: J.R.? J.R.!

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