All My Children Transcript Monday 8/3/09
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Provided by Suzanne
Proofread by Gisele
Taylor: It's not the "I'm hungry" face. You can't be. You just ate 10 minutes ago. You're not hungry, are you? It's not "too hot," "too cold." It's not the dirty diaper -- no, it's definitely not the dirty diaper face. So much easier if you would tell me -- hi.
Tad: Hi. Well, today is your lucky day, madam, because it just so happens I'm fluent in infant.
Taylor: This face is not on my list. I checked every face on this list.
Tad: Oh, that's easy. That's the "burp me before I explode" face.
Taylor: How could I forget to burp him?!
Tad: Relax, Lieutenant. You can't be expected to retain everything after a one-night crash course in all things baby. Watch and learn. It's a piece of cake, my little man. Oh, yes. It's a piece of cake. First, we take said baby -- oh, see? -- Put him gently over the shoulder kind of like that, and then just a few gentle taps. Before you know it...
[Trevor spits up]
Tad: The sweet stench of success.
Amanda: Are you sure?
Jake: I'm sure. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry.
David: Nurse? I'll take that.
Nurse: Yes, Doctor.
David: Oh, my God.
[Kendall dreams in her jail cell]
Liza: Don't worry. It'll all be over soon.
Judge: Has the jury reached a verdict?
Foreman: Yes, we have, your honor. We the jury find you, Kendall Hart Slater, guilty of my murder.
You did this. I'm dead because of you, Kendall.
Natalia: Kendall? Kendall? It's time.
Ryan: Have you talked to Kendall?
Zach: I went down there. They wouldn't let me see her.
Ryan: Damn it.
Liza: What -- what are you doing here?
Ryan: I'm here for moral support. Ok?
Liza: You're on the witness list. You can't be in the courtroom during the jury selection. And you? You can stay under one condition: No scenes. I'm serious, Zach. No outbursts. Do not lunge at the D.A. if he says something that you don't like.
Zach: I'll try.
Liza: No, you got to do more than try. An outburst by an angry husband is not gonna win any sympathy by the jury.
D.A. Willis: And your wife's gonna need all the sympathy she can get, especially after your daughter testifies.
Jake: You sure you don't want me to drive you home?
Amanda: No. I just need to be by myself.
Jake: If you need anything at all, you call me. Ok? I love you.
Amanda: Love you, too.
Jake: I love you. What?
David: I'm sorry.
Jake: For what?
David: I've seen Amanda's test results.
Jake: What are you doing looking at her results? Why do you feel you can do that?
David: I know what it's like to hear the news, to find out that you're never gonna have children again, and it's beyond devastating.
Jake: Fake sympathy -- that's interesting. Truth is, Dave, you're only happy when everybody is as miserable as you are. And you know what? We are. So are you happy? Do you feel better?
Ryan: You've seen my daughter. You know that she's in no state to be in a courtroom.
Liza: Emma was just released from the hospital. She's been catatonic for the last two days. She is in no condition to take the stand.
D.A. Willis: I have a heart. I understand the child's traumatized. That's why I'll have her testimony recorded to spare her the stress of the courtroom.
Liza: Well, that's really big of you, but even talking about it is too stressful.
D.A. Willis: The court's on my side. Judge Pearson has approved my request. See you inside.
Ryan: Liza, please tell me there's something we can do to stop this.
Liza: Listen, I can go for an injunction on the grounds that she is too emotionally and mentally unstable to take the stand. But I'm warning you there is no guarantee.
Ryan: Ok. You do what you go to do. All right?
Liza: Wait a minute. Where's the part where you go ballistic, you demand that I do more, and I pull you off the ceiling?
Ryan: I guess I just got to trust you, that's all.
Liza: All right, that conversation that I walked in on the two of you having?
Zach: What conversation is that?
Liza: Don't go playing hero. I am serious. Either one of you do anything to jeopardize this case, you are gonna make it worse.
[Jesse offers Kendall a bottle of water]
Kendall: No, no, thank you.
Jesse: I was hoping it wouldn't come to this. But I need you to know that I'm still working the Annie angle.
Kendall: It doesn't matter. They're about to pick 12 strangers to decide whether I'm guilty or not, whether I live or die.
Jesse: Well, come on. Let's not hang ourselves just yet. Ok? Nothing is being decided today.
Kendall: Jesse, today, tomorrow, any other day -- we all know what the verdict's gonna be.
Jesse: Uh, don't give up. You hear me? Do not give up. This is so far from over. You've got a lot of people on your side.
Natalia: Security detail's here. Dad? I know that crime scenes are off-limits, but what about the courthouse?
Jesse: Natalia --
Natalia: Dad, come on! Look, look, how am I gonna become a supercop like you if I'm stuck in the station answering phones and reading manuals all day? Come on. Please?
Jesse: All right, all right. All right.
Natalia: Yay! Wait -- thank you, sir.
Jesse: Not for nothing -- that whole "supercop like you" bit? A little obvious.
Natalia: It worked.
Jesse: Hey. You observe the transfer. That's it. Got it?
Natalie: Absolutely, Chief.
Taylor: I'm telling you this is not working.
Tad: I'm not surprised. Used milk has its own shelf life. It's gonna take more than a couple spin cycles to get rid of that regurgitated smell.
Taylor: Well, just throw it in the laundry.
Tad: Mrs. Robinson, you're trying to seduce me.
Taylor: Friends help friends keep their pants on.
Tad: Yeah? So that's what we are? Friends? Because, you know, I got the idea yesterday that, well, we were intentionally leaving things sort of unresolved.
Taylor: No. No. You told me that making decisions gives you a headache.
Taylor: So we're just two people spending time together, enjoying each other.
Tad: Enjoying each other's company, with or without pants on.
Taylor: Will you stop with the pants o-f-f with the kid sitting right there?
Tad: Like he cares -- he's wearing a dress. A pink dress.
Taylor: That looks very cute on you.
Tad: Not that there's anything wrong with that, my little munchkin.
Tad: You ok?
Amanda: Uh, yeah. You know, why don't you guys just go get some lunch, and I'll hang here with Trevor. Hi.
Taylor: Hey, Amanda, not for nothing, but you don't look so good.
Taylor: Do you want to take a break?
Amanda: Uh, no. I just need to be with my baby.
Amanda: Oh. Hello?
Jake: Hey. Are you sitting down? How's my wife?
Amanda: What happened?
Jake: Hayward bought it. He bought it. I know that must not have been easy on you.
Amanda: Well, I've had practice. Are you sure he's convinced? Absolutely truly sure?
Jake: I saw the look in his eyes, so yes, definitely. And you know what this means, right?
Amanda: We're adopting the baby.
Waitress: Are you ready to order?
Krystal: Uh, you know what? I'll just take a few minutes. My date's gonna be here any second now. Thanks.
Marissa: Hey. Sorry I'm late.
Krystal: I -- you didn't have to dress for me.
Marissa: Oh, no. That's just it: I've got to be at court in 20 minutes. They moved up Kendall's trial.
Krystal: Oh. Well, go. Go. You don't want to be late on your first day of course.
Marissa: Yeah. I really am sorry about this.
Krystal: No. No. Hey, you are a lawyer.
Krystal: I'm proud of you.
Marissa: Thanks. I'll see you soon.
Krystal: Call me. Let me know how it went. Ok?
Krystal: Oh, well. I think I am gonna be dining alone after all.
Amanda: David saw how upset I was after losing my baby. And now that we have it set up, so that he thinks I can't have children anymore, he will be expecting us to adopt. He'll have no clue.
Tad: Hmm. My brother, the boy genius.
Amanda: We just need to make sure and, you know, use enough time to make the adoption look real so David doesn't get all worked up. But in my opinion, the sooner the better. Yes.
Taylor: Right. Well, you know what? I think I am gonna take that break.
Tad: Where are you going?
Taylor: ConFusion. Straight to ConFusion.
Tad: Well, I -- I could -- she certainly knows how to make an exit. Ok, uh, just to be difficult, let's review. Um, so we faked the baby's death. We faked the baby's sex. And now we're going to fake the baby's adoption?
Amanda: Easy. Are you ok?
Tad: Uh, I have a headache.
Amanda: Well, I have some aspirin in --
Tad: No, it's not that kind of headache. I think my hard drive is just having a hard time processing a never-ending hit parade of lies. I mean, the baby's dead. The baby's alive. The baby's adopted. You know, he's a she. Trevor's a Tracy. Pink is blue. Blue is pink. You know, it just all adds up to one big "ow" right around here.
Amanda: I know it's been really horrible, but you have been great. And we would not have been able to do this without you. And the good news is, is that it's almost over. We're gonna have Trevor. We'll all be a happy family.
Tad: Yeah, well, easier said than done. You know, never underestimate the unexpected. For one thing, do you know why she tore out of here just now? Because, believe it or not, she's managed to start bonding with your kid. And, you know, giving "her" back to his mother is maybe not going to be so easy as just 1, 2, 3.
Amanda: Well, the last thing I would want to do is to hurt Taylor, especially after how great she's been.
Tad: Yeah, no kidding.
Amanda: But, I mean, that's always been the plan: To give him back. Maybe what Taylor needs is something else in her life.
Tad: Like a hobby? What do you suggest? Book club? Peewee golf? Bowling?
Amanda: A relationship.
Jake: This is the one. This is fine. I'm sorry. It's right in front of me.
Ryan: Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey!
Jake: Is anything wrong?
Ryan: No, no, no. Everything's good. Everything's good. Just trying to help out Zach, so that he can be at the trial with Kendall, and Ian just needs a little cardio checkup and a prescription refill.
Jake: Oh, sure. Jo, you know what? Check in the computer for Ian Slater, what time his appointment is. I'm sure it's with Sloane, Dr. Sloane. Hey, you look good, though. You look healthy. You don't want that. That's ok. You're ready to take on any challenger. Look at him: "Yeah, buddy!"
Ryan: Truthfully, I think he's a little bit more of a lover than a fighter, maybe. And I can't really tell. Aren't you? What do think? What do you think?
Jo: Ian Slater's appointment is next Friday, 11:30.
Ryan: Ah. Really? Hey, do you think that there's any chance that you could just give him a quick checkup while we're here just so I don't waste a trip to the hospital?
Jake: Sure, sure. I can make myself available.
Ryan: Nice. Great. Here you go. It saves me from making another trip to the hospital. I've got an appointment across town.
Jake: Very good. Let's get this show on the road.
Zach: Don't worry. It'll be over soon.
Bailiff: All rise! The Honorable Judge Pearson presiding.
[Judge pounds gavel]
Judge: We'll proceed with the jury selection. Please bring in the prospective jurors.
Taylor: Hey. Can I get an iced tea, please?
Krystal: Um, hi. Are you, um, meeting someone?
Taylor: No. Thank you.
Krystal: Tad told me you were dating.
Taylor: He told you that?
Krystal: Listen, I -- I think it's great.
Taylor: We are just friends.
Krystal: No, listen. I understand. I mean, that's how it started with us, just friends, and then the benefits kicked in. You know, marriage, kids -- not exactly in that order.
Taylor: Well, it's not like that. There's no benefits. No benefits.
Krystal: Tad the Cad's grown up, I guess, right? Apparently, women used to take a number, but he's not like that anymore. It's a big deal for him to get intimate with someone.
Taylor: Wow! I think -- I really think that you have the wrong idea about our relationship.
Krystal: Listen to me -- Taylor, I don't want you to feel uncomfortable. But if you're gonna be in Tad's life, you're gonna be in my life. Because, well, we live together, and we share a child together, so obviously we're -- we're gonna see a lot of each other. I just thought we might as well get better acquainted.
Singer: It's too late to go back now
Taylor: Can I get some fries?
Krystal: That -- that sounds great. Do you like cheese?
Taylor: Uh, yeah.
Krystal: Cheese. Extra cheese on those.
Singer: We both know what we're gonna do close the door
Jake: Flying colors.
Jake: Normal EKG. No complications, and such big cheeks.
Ryan: That is great news. Now if could we just get that prescription refilled, we'll be set. Great.
Jake: Is my pad over here?
Ryan: Hey, uh, can we make that for 90 days? Would you mind? You know, with the trial coming up, it would be one less thing for Zach to be worried about.
Jake: 90 days. Ok. What name do you want that under?
Ryan: What do you mean?
Jake: Well, you know, Mom and Dad -- they can't go running around saying "Ian" and "Spike" to the pharmacist if the family's on the run. So what's the name you'd like?
Ryan: Uh, I'm just picking up the prescription, Jake. That's all.
Jake: Ok. I'm not stupid, you know. I mean, if this was just a normal errand, I'm sure Slater would've sent the nanny or he would've sent some babysitter.
Ryan: Well, I'm practically like -- I'm practically like the stepdad to little Ian.
Jake: But you're also helping Kendall get out of town, and I get it, I get it: The bond between a mother and the children. I've been witnessing a lot of that lately. But then again, someone's gonna do some, you know, hard time if this little plan doesn't work out. Then what happens to Ian and Spike? I'm just saying.
Ryan: If I could just get the prescription, that would be great.
Jake: Oh, yeah. No problem. Maybe there's something else I can do. Something better?
Judge: The jury stands.
Bailiff: All rise!
Liza: We are good. We have a solid jury here.
Marissa: Juror number one I'm not so sure about.
Liza: Oh, no. We'll take care of her. I said I was gonna win. I'm gonna win. Listen, I want you to pull up the jury questionnaire cards. I want to know everything there is to know about every single one of them, and by tomorrow.
Marissa: You got it.
Zach: [Whispering] Go to the bathroom. Just do it.
Officer: All right, back away from the prisoner, Slater.
Krystal: Hit me. Oh -- and then he wears socks to bed. I kid you not. And if that's not bad enough, he wears the same socks over and over and over again until I have to either find them and throw them out or, really, burn them. I mean, it's that bad. I mean, really, who wears socks to bed?
Taylor: Actually, I -- I wear socks to bed.
Taylor: But I wash mine.
Krystal: I'm sorry.
Taylor: I do! I wash mine.
Krystal: Oh, God.
David: Looks like a party going on.
Krystal: Well, it was.
David: It's all right. I'm not gonna crash it. I'm just here to meet Marissa.
Krystal: Well, she, um, she's in court. Kendall's trial starts today.
David: Oh. Well, she must've forgotten to call me.
Krystal: Yeah, well, I was here to meet her, too.
David: Heh heh heh! Well, I guess I have to talk to our daughter about setting us up.
Krystal: Well, good luck with that, because she sure as heck doesn't listen to me.
David: Enjoy the fries.
Krystal: Whew. Anyway, you could do a lot worse than Tad. I sure did.
Amanda: Admit it -- you like Taylor.
Tad: Of course, I like her. But I like ice cream.
Amanda: You know what I mean. You "like her" like her.
Tad: She's attractive.
Amanda: Oh, you are such a man.
Tad: What? It's a compliment.
Amanda: You like her. You think she's attractive. You have a great time together. So what's the problem?
Tad: You're unbelievable. What are you gonna do if I don't give you an answer, huh? Waterboard me?
Amanda: Oh, come on. Just answer the question: What's the problem?
Tad: What's the problem? Take your pick. There are problems everywhere. For one thing, what, she's been unengaged for all of about 5 minutes. Then there's my messy divorce and the fact that I'm living with my ex-wife. That's a real winner.
Amanda: That's it?
Tad: That's not enough?
Amanda: Oh, you and Taylor. You're both full of excuses.
Tad: Really? No kidding me? Taylor -- Taylor said something about me?
Amanda: You know, I really could use some water to drink, not to waterboard.
Tad: Seriously, I want to know. I just -- you know, just out of pure, pure curiosity. I mean, did it come up, you know, easily in idle conversation or did you give her the Gitmo, too?
Amanda: Would you like a drink of water?
Tad: This is -- this is so unfunny. This is not fair. This is so uncool. Ok? After everything that we have done for you, it's not fair for you to just, you know, waltz away when things get interesting. So come on, you know? Just spill.
Amanda: You first.
Aidan: Juror number 11 is the key.
Zach: To what?
Aidan: A mistrial. All we need is one vote to hang the jury. Number 11 is that vote.
Zach: That's perfect.
Aidan: I can do it, Zach. Ok? I can work her. I can make her see Kendall as a mother.
Zach: I have confidence in Liza.
Aidan: Kendall needs all the help that she can get. All right, if I can work on this juror --
Zach: Can I interrupt you for one second, Aidan? What are you doing? Every time you turn around, you want to help somebody. What do you want?
Aidan: I want the same thing you do. We both know Kendall is innocent. I just want to see justice move along.
Zach: You used to say the same thing about Annie.
Aidan: Well, now I've seen the light.
Zach: Good for you.
Natalia: I'll pull the van around.
Kendall: I -- I have to use the restroom.
Officer: No. You'll have to wait till we get to the station.
Kendall: No. No. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. This can't wait.
Officer: No. This is procedure.
Kendall: We can keep the cuffs on.
Officer: Yeah. Sorry.
Kendall: You know what? This is harassment: two male cops deny a female prisoner the right to use the restroom? My attorney's right there in the courtroom. I'm sure she'd be happy to file suit against the police department.
Officer: Ok. But don't linger.
[Ryan sticks his head in the bathroom window]
Kendall: What -- what are you doing here?
Ryan: You didn't think Zach and I would let you spend another night behind bars, did you?
Kendall: Are you crazy? Ryan, there are cops everywhere, and I'm sure it'll be a couple of seconds before they bust right in.
Ryan: Well, then let's go.
Krystal: I know this is none of my business, but can I give you some advice?
Taylor: At this point in my life, I will take all the help I can get.
Krystal: Be good to Tad. Ok? I mean, he's had his share of heartache, and a big part of that is my fault.
Taylor: Krystal, I appreciate that. But, really, we are...
Taylor and Krystal: Just friends.
Krystal: I know. I know. But, you know, if it gets to be any more than that -- he's a good guy. One of the best. Stinky socks and all.
Taylor: Sounds like you had such a happy life.
Krystal: We did. We did. We had a good life -- you know, the picket fence, a light in the window -- and I slept with David and blew it all to hell.
Taylor: Do you still love Tad?
Krystal: I want what's best for Tad, and that's not me. I'm going to the ladies' room. I'll be right back. Ok?
Tad: She's fun. I mean, she may not be the best singer in the world, but then again, she'd do anything for you. You know, she's game for anything, even changing dirty diapers.
Tad: And she makes me laugh. She's cute, and you're right: I like spending time with her.
Amanda: You don't seem to mind kissing her.
Tad: Were you spying on us?
Amanda: You're not the only one -- bless you. You are not the only one with the talent of observing.
Tad: Yeah, well, I'm a paid professional. You? You're just nosy.
Amanda: Oh, come on. You like Taylor. You guys have a great time together. What is going on? You're both two consenting adults. Why tiptoe around?
Tad: Oh, I'm pleading the bullet in the head. You know, diminished capacity.
Amanda: Well, I guess that's the only thing you could do, because any other man in his right mind would be all over Taylor.
Tad: You are unbelievable. When did you become such a fan? I mean, not too long ago she was lip-wrestling with your husband -- you know, my brother? So all of a sudden you two are best friends?
Amanda: I like her. I like you. What's the worst that could happen?
Tad: Gosh, Mandy, I don't know. I could get my heart torn to shreds for the umpteenth time, because she decides she's not over her war hero ex.
Amanda: Or even worse, you could never pass go and pass up on an amazing woman. Tad, you keep saying that you're tired of lies and games, so do something. Step up. Be honest with yourself. Let yourself feel.
Natalia: All right, van's ready. Where's the prisoner?
Officer: In the ladies' room.
Natalia: How long has she been in there?
Officer: Just a few minutes. Relax.
Aidan: Are you gonna answer me or what?
Natalia: I'm going in.
Zach: You want to help?
Liza: Hey, Zach --
Aidan: What the hell was that for?
Zach: You don't say anything about her ever!
Liza: Zach, stop!
Jesse: What the hell is going on?! Wait.
Aidan: Just a misunderstanding, that's all, Chief.
Jesse: Let him go. Zach?
Jesse: It's gonna be a long trial. I don't need you trying to hand out beat-downs first day in!
Natalia: Yeah, she's gone! She went out the bathroom window!
Jesse: Lock this courthouse down. Seal off the entire area. Nobody in or nobody out!
Natalia: Dad, I --
Jesse: Ah, ah, ah. This is Hubbard. I need an A.P.B. put out for Kendall Hart Slater. Check the airport and the marina. She's got friends with yachts and planes. I need you to get out to the marina right now. What are you stand -- get out to the marina!
Natalia: All right!
Liza: You selfish bastard. One thing I asked you to do, one thing, was not to play hero.
Zach: I didn't.
Kendall: Ryan, what are we doing here? I thought we were leaving town.
Ryan: We are leaving town. We just got to pick up something first.
Ryan: Yes. Now. Now. You see?
Jake: Hey, hey.
Kendall: My boys. Hi, Spikey!
Ryan: Thank you, Jake, for bringing the boys. Thank you, thank you. We're cutting it very, very close here.
Jake: I know. Things are only gonna get worse.
Ryan: Well, too late to turn back now. Right?
Jake: Listen, I got Ian's meds. I've got your meds, too. Ok? This is six months' supply. I figured you're gonna be very busy surviving and coming up with new names for the kids. It's one less thing to think about.
Kendall: We thank you, Jake. Why are you doing this?
Jake: Well, let's just say as of late I've been a real big believer of moms and their kids being together.
Kendall: You could get into a lot of trouble for this.
Jake: I've done a hell of a lot worse, believe me. And this is a cause I can get behind. You two just take good care of each other.
Ryan: Ok. Thank you, Jake. Thank you.
Kendall: Thank you.
Jake: All right, I'm out, Ryan.
Ryan: Ok. All right, so, oh, we got to get those cuffs off. We got to get those cuffs off. I thought you might wanting this, so come here. You stay here, little man. You stay right here. Come here. Here's the deal, all right? There's a boat waiting for you at the marina, and the boat is going to take you to an airport out of town. Your mom is gonna be there, and she's gonna get you on a plane to take you out of the country.
Kendall: Hold on. My -- my mom is in on this, too?
Ryan: Yes. Come here, buddy. I got to talk to you. Ok? Ah. Spikester, I love you so much. I really do, but you got to do a favor for me. You got to take care of your mommy. Ha ha ha! You got to take care of your mommy for me, ok, please, and your little brother. Can you do that for me?
Ryan: Yeah? You think so? I love you so much. Thank you. I love you, and I'm gonna miss you so much. I know. I know. I'm gonna miss you, but guess what. Every single day -- I'm not gonna see you for a little while, but I'll be thinking about you. Ok? I promise. And you know me. I'll find you. I'll see you soon. Ok? I promise. I promise. I love you so much. Give me a kiss. Ok. We got to go. We got to go. Let's go.
Kendall: No. No. I'm not going anywhere.
Liza: You make me crazy. You know that, right? You begged me, "Take this case." You blackmailed me. Oh, you ordered me, "get Kendall off so she can be with my sons." Ok. So now what? What, you think she's free? This great plan of yours -- yeah. She's never gonna be free, Zach. She's gonna be in a town somewhere, and she's gonna be looked at a little too long. One minute she's gonna worry, she's gonna wonder, and then she's gonna take off to the next town and the next town. That's the life you want for her? For your sons? Zach, end this. Tell me where she is.
Marissa: Liza, I have an idea.
Liza: Not now.
Marissa: No, but I think it might help.
Liza: Nope. Just fix it.
Marissa: All right.
Liza: Zach, the only way I can remotely make this better is if you tell me where she is.
Bailiff: The judge would like to see you in his chambers.
Liza: Ok. I'll be there in one minute. Zach?
Amanda: Oh. Look, I know I'm not supposed to be here, but I was really super careful.
Jake: No, it's all right. It's ok. I couldn't stay away either. How's he doing?
Amanda: He is the happiest boy in the world, except for the pink dress.
Jake: Hmm. Yeah. I bet he'll be really happy when he gets out of that dress. In fact, I'd be really happy if you got out of that dress. What do you think? What do you say? Was that a yes? I think that's a yes. Is that a yes?
Amanda: I have the most incredible husband in the world.
Jake: Well --
Amanda: And the most adorable baby in the world. And soon we are not gonna have to hide anymore. I can take you to the zoo, the beach, the park. We can show him off. Brag to friends. Flash pictures. It's all because of you.
Jake: I love you, you know.
Amanda: I love you so much.
Jake: And we're gonna do all of those things. You just -- we just have to be a little more patient. Ok?
Amanda: Some things are worth waiting for.
Taylor: Yeah, I'll have another iced tea, please.
Tad: I think you've had enough, miss.
Taylor: I was just calling you.
Tad: Well, actually, at least it's not in your lap.
Taylor: Well, I'm learning to use both hands these days.
Tad: Make it two iced teas, would you, as long as mine's a beer. Anything you got on tap.
Taylor: You're such a good guy.
Tad: I don't know what you're talking about. I know which fork to use. I'm a whiz at Parcheesi, and I never eat garlic on a date unless my date approves.
Taylor: Well, there is that whole sock thing.
Tad: How do you know about the sock thing?
Taylor: Oh, no. My lips are sealed.
Tad: Ah. Well, did you happen to know that I'm a master at unsealing lips?
Taylor: I may have a source as to what that technique is.
Tad: Well, you play your cards right, kitten, you'll experience my technique up close and personal.
Taylor: Tad --
Tad: First, we got to get back to the baby.
Krystal: What baby?
Liza: Zach, I don't know what the hell you think you're doing, but call me as soon as you get this. Anything?
Jesse: No sign of Kendall. She must've had a car waiting. Any idea who the driver might be?
Liza: Well, Zach was busy here.
Jesse: Yeah, in a smackdown with Aidan -- obviously a distraction. If you're in on this --
Liza: Don't come at me!
Jesse: Not that big a leap, is it? You ran with Colby, hid out for years. Why not advise your client to do the same thing?
Liza: Ok. I still pay for that stupid move. And just for the record, I told Kendall that she would have her day in court, and we would win.
Jesse: Well, you'll get your day in court. But the winning part? Odds on that kind of just went out the window.
Liza: Ugh! Ugh! Agh! [Gasps] Oh, God!
[In a fit of rage, Liza hits a chair and the table then swings her briefcase and smacks David in the face]
Ryan: Um, yes, you are going, and you're going right now, Kendall. Because if you don't, the police are gonna be here any minute, and they're gonna put you away, and God knows when you're gonna get a chance to see your kids again. Ok? So we're going now.
Kendall: No, no, no. Ryan, what about you? If I take the boys, when's the next time you're gonna see spike? A month? A year from now? Longer? No, I won't do that to you. I won't do that to Zach. It's not fair.
Ryan: Kendall, you're not going back to jail. Ok? You're not going.
Zach: Hey, hey, what are you still doing here? I had to shake the cops. It took a while to get here.
Ryan: She won't go. She won't go.
Kendall: No, no, I'm not going.
Zach: Of course, you're going. You got to keep moving.
Kendall: No, Zach, I can't. No, Zach. The boys are your life. I can't do this to you. I cannot take them away from you.
[Police siren approaches]
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