AMC Transcript Tuesday 3/4/08

All My Children Transcript Tuesday 3/4/08


Provided by Boo
Proofread by Gisele

Krystal: I've been there, too, more times than I care to admit with more men than I'd like to count, and this is not the same.

Babe: Oh, that's right, I forgot, because J.R. was -- was kidnapped and drugged and then forced to have sex with Ms. STD.

J.R.: I didn't have sex. I didn't take a drink, either.

Babe: Oh, is that why you're looking so fresh and wonderful?

J.R.: Oh, God, would you just tell your daughter to shut up?

Babe: Don't you dare tell me to shut up!

J.R.: I wasn't, Krystal was!

Krystal: Quiet, quiet, both of you. Now, Jenny is in the middle of a long nap, and I would like to keep it that way.

Babe: Yeah, and I would like my ex-husband to go five minutes without feeding me a line of crap.

J.R.: Ugh!

Babe: J.R., you can talk all you want to about -- about kidnappers and -- and all the fantasies you want to. But the bottom line is -- is you lied to me about being Richie's donor to get me in bed, and I will never forgive you for that.

Doctor: Before you ask yet again, the answer is when I think it's safe.

Richie: You mean me getting out of here?

Doctor: I mean you doing anything. Look, you've just undergone a bone marrow transplant, but your recovery could take months.

Richie: Oh, not for this boy. Look, Doc, I know I will feel great if I could just get out of here. It's time to start living my life. It's been on hold for too long.

Doctor: Well, does she factor into that equation?

Richie: Oh -- oh, yeah. Yeah, she's right in the middle of it.

Jesse: We got to be careful, baby.

Angie: We have been careful. No one else could know you were here.

Jesse: We can't take that chance.

Angie: Can you hear them down there?

Jesse: No.

Angie: Do you -- do you recognize the voice?

Jesse: No, no, no. Shh.

Robert: You don't recognize me, do you?

Tad: No, I'm sorry, I don't.

Robert: It's been a long time. My name is Robert Gardner.

Tad: "Gardner"?

Robert: I'm your daddy's brother, Tad. I'm Uncle Rob.

Tad: Uncle Rob?

Robert: If you'd like some identification --

Tad: No, no, it's all right. I see the family resemblance I remember hearing about you. I know who you are.

Robert: Mm-hmm. May I come in?

Tad: Uh -- no, I don't think so. Not right now. I'm afraid I'm working on a case.

Robert: I had heard that you were a private eye.

Tad: That's right.

Robert: Well, I used to do a little of that sort of work myself. Maybe I can help you with your case.

Tad: Huh, I don't think so.

Robert: Ok.

Tad: Look, Uncle Rob, you and I don't know each other from Adam, so I hope you don't take this the -- the wrong way, but even if Ray Gardner was my father, that's only because he supplied the DNA. That's all he ever supplied. As far as I'm concerned, he was a twisted, evil son of a bitch that did nothing but specialize in torturing everybody he ever came in contact with. And I'm pretty sure I was smiling the day he died.

Angie: Maybe it's someone Tad knows.

Jesse: I still don't like it.

Angie: Jesse, what do you expect Tad to say? "My -- my friend who was supposedly dead the last 20 years is hiding upstairs, so could you please go away"? I'm sorry.

Jesse: No, baby, it's not you, it's me. Twenty years of having to look over my shoulder -- it's just become habit. I got to tell you, though, it's nice to have somebody watching your back.

Angie: You mean Tad?

Jesse: You -- and Tad and Frankie. But mostly you. Sometimes it's hard to believe it's real.

Angie: Believe it, baby. Because it is real. It is real.

Jesse: Thank God.

Robert: Look, Tad, I -- I know who my brother was, and your opinion of him is shared by many others.

Tad: Including you?

Robert: Well, you know, Ray was my big brother. It's a little hard to let go of all that, despite of what he did.

Tad: Yeah. Thank you for being honest, anyway.

Robert: I didn't come here to take a trip down memory lane with my brother. I know those are sad memories for everyone. I understand.

Tad: Why did you come here?

Robert: You're the only family I have, Tad, biological or otherwise, and I just thought that it was time that we got to know each other. I'll tell you what -- listen, here -- this -- I'm going to write down my cell number here. I am staying at The Seasons East. That's just outside town. I'd like to talk to you.

Tad: Ok.

Robert: Is that "ok, you're going to get in touch with me" or is that just "ok"?

Tad: It's "ok, I've got a lot of work to finish," so --

Robert: Of course, you do, yes. I'll let you go. You look good, Tad. You look real good. I'll see you. Bye-bye.

J.R.: Ok, Babe. You just believe whatever the hell that you want to.

Babe: I don't need your permission for that. Thank God Richie didn't have to depend on you.

J.R.: Oh, yes, brothers and sisters, let's praise Richie Novak! Hallelu --

Krystal: What? What? What is it?

J.R.: Ow, I'm sick!

Krystal: Well, sit down. Sit down.

J.R.: I feel like a truck hit me.

Babe: Or you maybe fell down drunk?

Krystal: Babe --

Babe: Oh, did I say something?

J.R.: Can you just find Richie and go torture him?

Babe: Don't think that I wouldn't -- find him.

Krystal: All right, look, are you two kids finished? Because I need you both to listen for Jenny in case she wakes up, and I've got some errands to run.

J.R.: I can handle it.

Babe: You -- you can't even handle a bowl of soup, J.R. Don't worry, Mama, I will handle it.

Krystal: Just don't kill each other when I'm gone, all right?

J.R.: Why won't you just let this go?

Babe: Because I -- I'm -- I'm sick and tired of the ride, J.R. Just hoping that you'll change, and wishing that I could trust you, and then being disappointed all over again. You know, it hurts.

J.R.: Yeah. I know the feeling.

Babe: Well, what did you expect after all you put us through?

J.R.: Nothing, I suppose. I mean, after everything I've done to you, I shouldn't expect anything. I guess I'm just stuck, though.

Babe: What do you mean?

J.R.: The only person's opinion that really matters to me -- or that I trust, that I'm willing to fight for -- is you, Babe. What am I supposed to do with that?

Man: Kendall, I'm sorry.

Aidan: Can we get this freak out of here?

Officer: No problem.

Second Officer: And you've never seen this man before tonight?

Kendall: No.

Officer: You sure you don't want me to call a doctor?

Aidan: Actually, that's not a bad idea, Kendall.

Kendall: No, no, it's ok. I'm -- I'm fine. I'm -- I'm fine.

Officer: We'll call you if there are any more questions.

Kendall: Thank you.

Aidan: Thanks again.

[Door closes]

Kendall: Um -- I should go get dressed.

Aidan: I'll wait outside, all right?

Kendall: Wait. Thank you for coming back.

Aidan: You're welcome. I should've been here, though. I'm sorry. But it looked like you had him under control. You did a good job.

Kendall: He was going to rape me.

Aidan: Kendall --

Kendall: No, no, he -- he was going to rape me. I knew that's exactly what he wanted the second he walked in the door, and he wasn't going to stop.

Aidan: Hey, hey, you're fine.

Kendall: Oh, my God. No, I'm not, I'm not! I'm sorry. Ugh -- I'm sorry, I didn't mean to -- to -- to act like this.

Aidan: No, you -- Kendall, you're fine, all right? If you want to cry, you want to scream, you want to hit me, just go ahead.

Kendall: No, I don't want to hit you.

Aidan: That guy obviously wanted something. But he didn't get it. Because you stopped him.

Kendall: I did, didn't I? Whew. I -- I told you about Richard Fields, right?

Aidan: Well, your so-called father, yeah. Why are you bringing him up now?

Kendall: He just popped into my head.

Aidan: Kendall, don't do it to yourself.

Kendall: No, he was the man who took my mother and forced her to have sex with him. He raped her, Aidan. And I was the result.

Aidan: Kendall, please --

Kendall: No, I -- I mean, of course, I didn't believe her. I didn't. I mean, I even tried to be a real daughter to that son of a bitch. He came back to town, and I actually pretended that he was Daddy. Can you believe that? Until he went after Bianca.

Aidan: The man was stopped, all right?

Kendall: Yeah, that time. My Grandma Mona killed him. And that's what I wanted to do to that man tonight. I wanted to take a knife, and I wanted to stab it in his heart over and over and over again! I wanted to do it for my mother, and I wanted to do it for my sister, and I wanted to do it for me! I wanted to kill him! I wanted to kill him, and I would have killed him. I would have.

Tad: It's fine, it's just me. We're ok.

Jesse: Who -- who was that guy?

Tad: Good old Uncle Robert.

Angie: Who?

Tad: It was none other than Ray Gardner's brother.

Jesse: I didn't know he had a brother.

Tad: Yeah.

Jesse: Jenny never mentioned him to me.

Angie: To me, either.

Tad: Yeah, well, I'm not surprised. My sister and I went to considerable trouble to prune that side of the family tree.

Angie: Well, what did he want?

Tad: He's just passing through Pine Valley. He wanted to connect with his last living relative.

Angie: Oh. That must've been fun for you.

Tad: Yeah, it was more like unexpected.

Jesse: What was he like?

Angie: Was he anything like that crazy Ray Gardner?

Tad: I don't know. I -- I mean, he seemed ok enough. Even offered to help me with a case because, "I used to do that kind of thing." Whatever, it doesn't matter. You don't need to hear about it. Neither do I. God, just hearing the name "Gardner" is bad enough, considering all the beatings he ever threw me, what he did to Ruth --

Angie: But he was never your real father, Tad, Joe is, and he always will be.

Tad: Yeah, I know, I know. But it's --

Jesse: How'd you leave it with him?

Tad: I didn't. I mean, he gave me a phone number -- forget it.


Krystal: Who's there? Who are you?

Robert: I'm sorry. I -- I didn't mean to startle you.

Krystal: You didn't answer my question. I said who the hell are you, mister? And why were you following me?

Robert: Oh, I wasn't following you. No, actually, I -- I just came out of over there.

Krystal: You -- you had business with Tad?

Robert: In a manner of speaking, yes.

Krystal: Either you did or you didn't.

Robert: Well, Tad is my nephew. My name is Rob, Rob Gardner. And you are?

Krystal: Huh -- I -- I'm Krystal. I -- I'm Tad's wife. Hi.

Robert: Well, it's a pleasure to meet you.

Jesse: So I guess that's the end of you and good old Uncle Robert, huh?

Tad: Well, we can only hope. On the other hand, it's probably not fair for me to blame him for all the lousy things my father did, but --

Angie: You do anyway.

Tad: Yeah. It doesn't matter anyway. Let's talk about something important, like who's still after you after 20 years.

Jesse: Hmm.

Tad: If you still think John Remington is the key to this whole thing, we got our work cut out for us. I mean, all we know is, you know, you took a bullet for him in 1988, and a year later, he still managed to get shot anyway. That's a whole lot of dots to connect, so let's get started. Well, I mean, what do we know?

Jesse: Well, Remy -- he's always played his cards really close to the vest. But when I was tailing him, he was suspected of money laundering.

Tad: You know, if memory serves, it seems to me a whole lot of people were interested in these particular drug dealers back then.

Jesse: It makes sense to me that the same people who tried to take me out took him out, too, but why would they wait a whole year to do it?

Tad: Because -- I don't know -- maybe they wanted to make sure that he had what they were looking for. I mean, they knew you didn't have it, so they started working on him. Or maybe they wanted the heat to die down a little bit, because they didn't want the police to look too deeply into, you know, the connection between the two of you.

Angie: Then why go after Jesse? He had already told him that he didn't know anything.

Jesse: And they thought I was dead.

Tad: Well, they know you're alive now. And that you know they definitely want something. So, figure out who they are, we can ask them what they're interested in. And in the meantime --


Krystal: What happened? Is everybody ok?

Tad: We're fine. We're just really, really happy to see you. What is it? What's wrong?

Krystal: Oh, I just was a little shaken up out there.

Tad: What do you mean?

Krystal: Well, I thought somebody was following me, and it turned out it was your Uncle Rob?

Robert: The photo album is almost complete. I just need Jesse now.

Babe: I have made a fool of myself so many times with you, J.R.

J.R.: I know, Babe, but this time, it's on the level.

Babe: Ok, look, you -- you have to admit that your story's a little out there. I mean, scary guys coming and -- and grabbing you and drugging you? Why would somebody do something like that?

J.R.: I don't know, I don't know. But I'm going to find out with or without you.

[J.R. groans]

Babe: Do you think that I enjoy being so hard on you? Keeping Little A away from his father?

[J.R. groans]

J.R.: You want him to look up to you. You don't want to be disappointed. Believe me, I know what it's like to lose respect for your father.

Babe: I know Adam has broken your heart a million times.

J.R.: You haven't completely been on the up-and-up, either.

Babe: What are you talking about?

J.R.: Richie Novak.

Babe: Oh -- what about him?

J.R.: Good question, Babe. What about him?

[Babe sighs]

J.R.: Or better yet, what about this sleazy ex-con that's made you put your virtue on the line to save his sorry ass?

Babe: My virtue?

J.R.: Yeah, your virtue. What is it, strip poker, winner takes all? Only the real winner is good old Richie.

Babe: Oh, I think there was a prize -- or two or three -- for you, J.R.

J.R.: You know what I mean.

Babe: Ok. Look, you know that I made that bet just as much for you as I did for him.

J.R.: Ye. If I did a good turn for Richie, there'd be a little condo in heaven for me. You know what? That's a crock.

Babe: Is this going to be one of those old "do you like him" or "do you have the hots for him" conversations?

J.R.: Why bother? Obviously, there's something in the air.

Babe: No, you just refuse to believe that a female human being would do something for a male human being without sex somehow being involved.

J.R.: Well, that's been my experience.

Babe: That's right, because we all know about your experience, J.R. Well, guess what -- the rest of the world doesn't operate that way.

[Phone rings]

Babe: Richie?

J.R.: Huh.

Aidan: Kendall, you need to eat something. Come on.

Kendall: Ok, all right. Yeah, right.

[Aidan chuckles]

Aidan: I knew you'd do that.

Kendall: So -- were you shocked?

Aidan: About what part

Kendall: Oh, the part where I take the knife and I jab it into his heart over and aver again.

Aidan: Oh, that.

Kendall: I probably wouldn't have.

Aidan: You know, don't be so sure. You know, sometimes, when you feel hurt or you feel threatened, a rage can come over you that is so -- so intense that -- yeah -- you can't control it.

Kendall: Spoken like a man who's been there before.

Aidan: Hmm. A few more times than I'd like. What can you do?

Kendall: God, it's just -- it's so hard to understand how men like that are wired. I mean, to want to -- to -- to dominate and to punish.

Aidan: I don't understand it, either. You know, there's no lower form in life than a man that wants to take advantage of a woman. I mean, if you'd have been holding that knife, I would've been cheering you on.

Kendall: Hmm. Uh-uh. I don't buy that for a minute.

Aidan: Oh, no?

Kendall: No, no. The Aidan Devane I know would've taken the knife out of my hand and done the job himself. Quick, clean, no mess.

Aidan: Thanks for the vote of confidence.

[Kendall chuckles]

Kendall: God -- remember last week when all we had to worry about was me being pregnant with your child? And having my marriage and your relationship blown to bits?

Aidan: Vaguely.

Kendall: What about next week?

Aidan: What are you saying, that we're somehow magnets for trouble?

Kendall: You tell me.

[Aidan sighs]

Aidan: Look, bad things happen to everybody, right? I mean, to everybody, and a lot of bad things have been happening to us recently. But there comes a time in everybody's lives when the bad things stop and good things happen.

Kendall: Well, bring on the good.

Aidan: Do I need to remind you of how great and successful we are? You run a -- a fantastic cosmetics company, you have two beautiful kids, a great husband, which actually reminds me -- what do you want me to fill him in? You want me to fill him in on what happened?

Kendall: No, no, no.

Aidan: Well, he's going to find out soon.

Kendall: Ok, but not now.

Aidan: Well, when?

Kendall: I don't know, Aidan, ok? Just please not tonight. I mean, God, do you want to talk about dark clouds? Zach and I have been through enough storms together this entire year to last us a lifetime. I just want to give him a little bit of peace until we get home -- if that's all right with you.

Aidan: Fine.

Kendall: You mean that? You're not going against some bodyguard code you guys made a thousand years ago?

Aidan: We'll let the code slip for tonight, all right?

Kendall: Thank you.

Aidan: He's going to find out soon, though.

Kendall: I know that.

[Kendall sighs]

Kendall: It's funny.

Aidan: What?

Kendall: Well, I was just thinking about this movie from way back when. Remember it -- "Terms of Endearment"? Remember that?

Aidan: Uh -- yeah, it's a chick flick. I mean, I never saw it.

Kendall: Ok.

Aidan: I never watched that.

Kendall: Yeah, well, um -- Shirley MacLaine says to Jack Nicholson, "Whoever thought you'd turn out to be a good guy?"

Aidan: Hmm. It's actually "nice guy," but then again, hey, I never saw it, so how would I know?

Kendall: Well, you are a nice guy, Aidan. Greenlee's really lucky. I am, too.

Richie: Doctor said it all went off without a hitch and that I'll be back on my feet in no time.

Babe: Did you get to meet your donor?

Richie: Oh -- yeah. Yeah, as a matter of fact, I did. In fact, she's a sweet little old lady. Funny enough, she asked me to meet her daughter but I said, "nope, no way. I already -- I already found my girl."

Babe: Um -- Richie, I'm really happy for you.

Richie: Yeah, and -- and -- and tell J.R. I said thank you again for his offer.

Babe: Actually, you know what? You can tell him in person. He's right here.

Richie: He is?

Babe: Yeah, I -- I came to help Mama watch Jenny, and he was at the house. Here.

J.R.: I don't want to talk to him.

Babe: Oh, God. J.R., he wants to thank you -- apparently for nothing but, you know, it would be a nice gesture. Here. Oh, just take it.

J.R.: Richie.

Richie: Hey, Junior.

J.R.: I heard everything worked out for you. That's great.

Richie: Hey, I just wanted to tell you how grateful I was for your offer. A lot of guys wouldn't do it under the circumstances.

J.R.: What circumstances?

Richie: Oh, you know, the way I feel about Babe.

J.R.: Oh, yeah. You know, Babe and I -- we were just talking about that, how she has such a big heart and, you know, how she's always taking in people and strays and --

Babe: Oh, ok.

J.R.: Yeah, have I ever -- have I ever told you about her cat Rex?

Babe: Give me the phone.

J.R.: What was that, bro?

Babe: J.R., give me the phone!

J.R.: No, well, I can't -- I can't hear you. What?

[Babe sighs]

Babe: Give it.

Richie: I'm right here.

J.R.: Hello, hello? Hello? I guess it -- it got disconnected.

Tad: So, you met good old Uncle Robert, huh?

Krystal: Well, more like he met me -- kind of gave me the creeps, actually.

Tad: Yeah, well, the Gardner clan will do that to you.

Jesse: Ray Gardner's younger brother.

Tad: Hmm.

Krystal: Oh, my God -- Tad, I didn't realize. I -- are you ok?

Tad: Yeah, I'm fine. I mean, it's not like he threatened me or anything. It's just a face I didn't expect to see from a family I'd just as soon forget.

Angie: And we immediately thought he was coming after Jesse.

Krystal: Well, yeah. I mean, come on, Tad -- here in this office?

Tad: Yeah, I know -- I'm thinking the same thing. Look, the facts there's not normally that much traffic around here but there is enough, and the truth is that my partner, Aidan, is going to come back in a few days anyway.

Jesse: So, what, are you kicking me out?

Tad: You don't have to put it that way, but we do have to find you a safer place to stay.

Jesse: Well, wherever that is, Angie and Frankie cannot be there.

Angie: We already discussed this. And leaving, as I told you, is not an option.

Jesse: And neither is risking anything happening to you or Frankie! I didn't stay away for 20 years for nothing. Angie, you've got to trust me on this.

Angie: And you'll never leave me?

Jesse: Oh.

Angie: Can you promise me that, too?

Jesse: Absolutely -- you, too.

Tad: What exactly is that supposed to mean?

Jesse: Tad, whoever is coming for me knows about you and you. Krystal, you got a baby in the house. These people don't play. I'm so -- I can't believe I brought this on you.

Tad: There you go again with the guilt. Look, if memory serves, if I recall correctly, I was the one that was doing jumping jacks trying to get you to stick around.

Krystal: And I was the one who told Angie to take the train.

Angie: And it's the best decision I ever made.

Tad: We're trying to say is we love you. And as far as we're concerned, having you back is a miracle, and we'll do what we have to, ok, whatever it takes to protect both our families. But we're sure as hell not letting you go -- not without a fight.

Aidan: If you tell anyone about this, I'm going to get really mad.

Kendall: About what?

Aidan: You know.

Kendall: Oh -- you mean, that you're a secret chick flick expert?

Aidan: It would ruin my reputation and it would cost Tad and me a lot of business.

Kendall: Ok, well, no worries. Your -- your secret is safe with me, Ms. Devane.

[Aidan chuckles]

Aidan: You watch it, now.

Kendall: Is this what you do with her, too? Greenlee, when she has a meltdown? Because God knows she has plenty of them.

Aidan: Really?

Kendall: Yeah, quite often actually. Do you -- do you change the subject and -- and make her feel better, you know, get her to climb out of whatever dark place she's in with a -- with a smile or a joke? Or a touch? Anyway --

Aidan: Yeah, um, you know, I called downstairs and gave the direct orders not to allow any visitors or phone calls unless they came through me.

Kendall: Good, ok.

Aidan: I'm going to be just across the hall, all right?

Kendall: I know.

Aidan: So, if you can't sleep or want to talk, whatever it is --

Kendall: Yeah, yeah -- no, I know, I know. Thank you.

Aidan: Listen, um, tomorrow you're going to do great. It's going to be a wonderful day. You're going to get to meet all of your fans.

Kendall: I know -- huh.

Aidan: Good night.

Kendall: Good night. Aidan, wait.

Babe: You know, that -- that was awful.

J.R.: What?

Babe: In the long list of you and awful, that -- that came pretty close to the top 10.

J.R.: Oh, what am I supposed to do? I -- I acknowledged the guy for his appreciation.

Babe: Yeah, and I never had a cat named Rex!

J.R.: I was being metaphorical, Babe, and you have to admit you have taken in the odd miscreant, animal and human being and, you know, present company absolutely included --

Babe: Well, thank you for at least acknowledging that much.

J.R.: Look, I know that I make you crazy sometimes.

Babe: "Sometimes"?

J.R.: But you have to know that I love you more than anything in this world, more than anybody ever could.

Babe: Even more than Richie Novak?

J.R.: Ok, now you're just messing with me.

Babe: Yeah, well, you deserve it after that low-down, dirty trick you just pulled.

J.R.: [Southern accent] Yeah, well, you know, I'm just going to be fighting for my woman.

Babe: Oh, oh -- don't go southern on me, mister. I can spot a phony from a mile away.

J.R.: [Normal voice] Why don't you just kiss me?

Babe: Don't be ridiculous.

J.R.: I love you.

Babe: Only when it suits you.

J.R.: Always.

Babe: Yeah, sure.

[J.R. kisses Babe]

Babe: What are you trying to prove?

J.R.: Nothing! Except, you know, that you're still in love with me -- too. You're just too damn stubborn to admit it.

Babe: Ok, you want to know something, smart-ass? You're right -- I am. But what has that ever gotten me -- your love, J.R.? Yes, yes, I have -- I have a beautiful son who -- who I adore, who we adore and love more than life itself but -- but what else? We have great sex -- yeah. Yeah, we have that. But do we have respect? Nah. Do we have trust? No, no, I don't think we do. To you, I --

[Babe sighs]

Babe: I will always be the girl who grew up in the trailer park and fell for the boy who lived in a mansion on the clouds. But I am not that girl anymore, J.R. And you are too damn old to be that boy. So when you truly, finally grow up, you give me a call.

Doctor: What's the matter, Richie? Another 50, 60 years of life isn't enough for you?

Richie: You know something, doc? You're really starting to piss me off. And people who do that -- well, they don't turn out so well, and if that statement confuses you at all, why don't you pick up the phone and call the penitentiary and ask about the prison shrink -- by the name of Chambers? He died tragically. Am I making my point with you?

Tad: We scared each other half to death.

Krystal: Not me!

Angie: I'm not scared.

Jesse: Oh, yeah, Miss "I'm not scared" -- you, too.

Krystal: Ok, well, what happens now?

Tad: Well, the three of us were trying to connect the dots focusing on this guy John Remington that was killed -- at least that's who Jesse thinks we should focus on.

Angie: Look, John's -- John's mother --

Jesse: What about her?

Angie: Well, he -- he used to talk about her a lot. You know, I -- I think that she lives in the area.

Tad: Might be a place to start.

Jesse: Well, let's do this. Let's get out there!

Tad: "Let's"? Oh, sure. Let's do this, and after we get done doing it, I'll line up all the -- the interviews with all the magazines and TV shows, because God knows we'll get a lot of mileage off the guy that came back from the dead.

Jesse: You need your own sitcom, Tad, you're so funny.

Tad: Why don't you just rent yourself your own billboard?

Angie: All right, look, I'll talk to her.

Jesse: Uh -- hello? What?

Angie: We're all in this together.

Tad: Yes, we are.

Jesse: Oh.

Angie: Come on, baby. I'll -- look, I'll be careful.

Jesse: Oh, this is so out of control!

Angie: I'll be fine.

Tad: And I'll be right behind her.

Aidan: What should I do?

Kendall: I don't know. It just -- it just didn't feel right, you leaving.

Aidan: Hmm. Yeah.

Kendall: What am I doing?

Aidan: You're just -- you're just being human, that's all. And I feel like I -- I feel like I should stay -- but on the couch. What do you think?

Kendall: I -- I think -- I think that that would be a good idea.

Aidan: Ok.

Kendall: Yeah.

Aidan: But on the couch?

Kendall: On the couch, yeah.

Kendall: Um -- Aidan, I --

Aidan: Kendall, what -- whatever you want, all right?

Kendall: I want my family.

Kendall: Whew.

[Phone rings]

Rachael: Hello?

Kendall: Rachael.

Rachael: Hey, Kendall. How's the big book tour going?

Kendall: Uh -- it's fine, Rachael. Uh -- yeah, it's -- it's going fine. Uh -- can I talk to Zach?

Rachael: You know, he's out. He's at the casino tonight.

Kendall: Oh. Ok. Well, I'll -- I'll just talk to him later.

[Spike fusses]

Kendall: I hear Spike! Is Ian up, too?

Rachael: No -- just the Spike man. We were finishing "The Lonely Moose," and he just nodded out.

Kendall: Oh, yeah, of course. The phone probably woke him up. What a great thing to have to worry about. Can I say hi?

Rachael: Sure. Hey, go for it.

Kendall: Hey, Spikey. It's Mom. You know what? We haven't spoken on the phone for a really long time. I miss you so much, honey. I miss you, I miss your brother. I love you so much.

>> On the next "All My Children" --

Adam (to Samuel): I know that you're getting ready to run for the Senate. I'd like to help you.

Amanda (to Annie): Did you get some last night?

Greenlee: Come on, Annie, let's hear it. Who, when, and where?

Ryan (to Kendall): No, I got to talk to you, ok? I -- I'm beginning to remember.

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