All My Children Transcript Tuesday 4/10/07
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Provided By Boo
Proofread by Gisele
Babe: Bianca, secret admirer. Who would have thought? It is romantic, it's mysterious. It's pure genius. Zoe has to love it.
Kendall: It's not genius when the giftee is wigged out.
Bianca: I should just tell her.
Annie: No, no, no, not yet. Zoe loved the crystal.
Bianca: Is that why she gave it away?
Babe: Oh, come on. The whole "I heart you thing" -- who doesn't want to be hearted?
Bianca: Well, right now, Zoe is thinking stalker and whacko --
Bianca: Not romance.
Annie: Well, of course at first, her head goes straight to wackos. She's thinking like a rock star.
Kendall: Yes, a guy rock star. Now, since Zoe's not into it, you can just bail. Zoe will never know.
Bianca: I want her, and I want her to know. I just don't know how to do it.
Kendall: You don't. Problem solved. Move on.
Zoe: I knew this appointment was going to be a bad idea. I'll move. Or leave. Leaving might be good.
Ryan: Hold on, hold on. Hold, hold, hold, hold. It's time for an apology.
Erica: Why did you drag me here? I am not the one who hijacked the yacht. That would be Barbara. Save the lecture for her.
Jack: There's no lecture, Erica. We just need to get to the boat now, ok?
Erica: Well, I need to interview a segment producer. I have back-to-back appointments.
Jack: Like I don't have anything to do? Come on, it won't take long.
Erica: Jack, what are you doing? Jack -- you are not shipping me out to sea, Jack.
Di: It's all clear. Come on in.
Ava: Ok. Um -- what -- what is this place? Like a freakin' castle? What are you going to do, like, drop me in the dungeon and tie me to chains, and feed me to the rats?
Di: No, there's no rats here.
Aidan: Bloody hell. What have you done?
Lily: This is not standard business protocol. You have to have an appointment.
J.R.: What the hell do you think you're doing, Slater?
Lily: I told him he needed an appointment.
Josh: Sorry about that.
Zach: Are you ok, Lily?
Lily: This is -- this is going to be loud. I'll go to the closet.
J.R.: You want to take me on? Here I am.
Krystal: Adam, my water broke. I've got to get to the hospital.
Adam: Well, what is this? Where I get all dithery and -- like a would-be father, and -- and grab the suitcase and -- forget about you? I -- I can -- I can handle that --
Krystal: Adam, you got to help me.
Adam: I'm going to forget everything about you.
Krystal: Oh, Adam, come on. Now, we can fight later. This baby is coming right now. Oh -- Adam, this baby's coming fast. I don't think I can make it down the stairs.
Adam: Ok, if you're going to -- if you're going to deliver that creature in this bed, then that's just another reason to burn the mattress. Hell, the whole damn wing.
Krystal: She's an innocent child, Adam!
Adam: Innocent? From whom did she inherit that?
Krystal: Adam, you can despise me, you can hate me, but I need help.
Adam: You -- you told me that you had 28 glorious hours in labor with Babe. Now -- now, according to my arithmetic, that leaves you about 27 hours left. This building is full of staff, any one of which can take you to the damn hospital!
Krystal: Oh, God --
Adam: So I'm -- I'm out of here.
Krystal: Where is the phone?
Adam: You -- you ripped it out of the wall, woman.
Krystal: Damn it, Adam, do you think this is funny?
Adam: No, I don't think it's the least bit amusing. Now, if that's it, fine. I'm going to --
Krystal: No, wait, Adam -- Adam -- Adam, you brought that Lamaze coach here, remember? I leaned up against your chest, and you helped me breathe? We were going to do this together, remember? And that bracelet that you bought me -- it said "Arabella and Charlotte." You remember that.
Adam: Your daughters, not mine.
Krystal: You love me. I saw it in your eyes just the other day.
Adam: You're delusional.
Krystal: No. No. No, you are angry, and you're hurt, and you had the whole world ripped out from underneath you, but the love is still there, Adam. You want this marriage to work just as much as I do. I saw it in your eyes, Adam. It was just a spark. It was just a flicker, but it was there! Oh! Adam -- Adam, this baby is coming, whether you want her to or not.
J.R.: What's your game, Slater?
Zach: What paranoid delusions are you under today, Junior?
Josh: Well, his paranoia brought him to me first. He just found out that Cambias beat out Chandler Enterprises in buying out that microchip company.
Zach: That's a good little company. That's just good business.
J.R.: Don't go business with me. That was personal.
Zach: Nah --
J.R.: You only went after that company, because I was already there.
Zach: Well, you got there kind of late.
J.R.: Is this how you stick it to me? You already helped Josh stash Babe in the casino to keep her away from me -- now this?
Hannah: I authorized the purchase of that company. It wasn't the least bit personal because I have no idea who you are.
J.R.: Oh, yeah. You don't know who I am? Who are you?
Hannah: Hannah Nichols, CFO, Cambias industries.
J.R.: J.R. Chandler, CEO of Chandler Enterprises.
Hannah: Congratulations. Quite the coup, getting your father ousted. Adam Chandler was a force.
J.R.: Well, it was past time.
Hannah: Hmm. Big shoes to fill. No wonder you're in such a foul mood. First time you step up, blow the deal. Better luck next time, huh?
[Door opens and closes as Hannah leaves]
J.R.: Well, is that how you let your officers treat the competition? Huh.
Zach: Hmm. What are you looking for, an apology? Nah, I'm out. What about a Cambias pen? You want a Cambias pen? These are nice.
J.R.: Actually, some parting gifts might be nice. Don't mess with Chandler.
Zach: Ok. Why don't you go home and go to your office and do your job. I'll see you.
[Door opens and closes as J.R. leaves]
Zach: Ay, ay -- why are you still here? Did you want a pen or a notepad? Something?
Josh: No, I'm not here for office supplies. I want to work for my brother-in-law.
Babe: So, do you have any more gifts planned for Zoe?
Bianca: Yes, the next one's almost ready.
Annie: Oh, well, you have to give it to her today. Momentum -- you got to sweep her off her feet.
Kendall: Oh, there's a visual. Can you -- can we please just get back to work? We have a lot of stuff to do. Now, did anybody hear about Simone's Fusion shares?
Bianca: No, but they have to turn up.
Babe: Ok, work. Um -- how about the blush? What do you think of the new blush? I'm sorry, hold on. Speaking of blush -- you totally blush every time you talk about Zoe or when you see her. It's really cute.
Kendall: Hey, can we please stop? We have work to do, like I said. We do. And besides, Bianca and Zoe will never be anything more than just friends.
Bianca: Kendall's right. Unless I can find the perfect way to tell Zoe how I really feel.
Babe: Totally! You have to go for it.
Bianca: Kendall, I really like her. I want us to be more than friends.
Kendall: Ok, Bianca -- Zoe's very complicated.
Kendall: Complicated. Ok? It would be crazy to get involved.
Annie: Oh, but crazy in the best way. Don't give up. This whole "secret admirer hearts and flowers" thing will definitely win her over.
Babe: And then you can plant the "kiss."
Kendall: My God. Could you guys get any girlier? Is there one bad chick flick cliché you haven't used?
Babe: Actually, yeah. Um --
Bianca: We are head over heels.
Annie: Madly in love.
Babe: Looking for Mr. Right.
Bianca: Ms. Right.
Babe: Mr. Right Now, baby.
Annie: Our knights in shining armor.
Bianca: Our soul mates.
Zoe: The Satin Slayer is behind bars.
Ryan: I came down really hard on you.
Zoe: Yeah, yeah, loved ones were dying.
Ryan: No, I tagged you as a suspect, I didn't have any evidence, and I -- and I am truly sorry for that. I was out of line.
Zoe: Ryan, it's fine. You saved Kendall. Babe is alive because you caught that horrible killer. Let's just forget about the rest of it, shall we?
Ryan: Ok, yeah. Yeah, fair enough.
Zoe: I assume we're not here for the same reason.
[Ryan and Zoe chuckle]
Erica: Why did I need to inspect the yacht? Everything works. Nothing was damaged, nothing was taken. Although I must say, I'm very surprised at Barbara's restraint.
Jack: This is not about Barbara, Erica, this is about our divorce settlement. Remember that? The dividing and selling of common assets? I have a buyer. The "At Last" will be sold today.
Krystal: I have to get to a phone. Oh! It's a baby, Adam. It's not yours, but it's an innocent child. You got to help me, Adam. Help her.
Adam: Call Tad.
Kendall: All right, you guys, put it in reverse, please. Now, Bianca, you can't even have a real relationship.
Bianca: Why can't we?
Babe: Yes, they can.
Kendall: Uh -- hello? Sex? You, Zoe? Zoe, you? Can't be done.
Bianca: You are so hugely and phenomenally you. I mean, God, the stuff you let out of your mouth.
Kendall: What is so funny about being celibate the rest of your life?
Bianca: Ok -- you have Zoe and me married, you have us in bed. Can I just take her on a date first?
Kendall: What, are you going to shake her hand at the front door? Ok, listen to me. This is -- this is very un-PC of me, I know. But you're into the female form. Have you seen Zoe's shoulders?
Bianca: I love her shoulders. I love every part of her.
Kendall: Ok, well, there's one part you're not going to love. Can't exactly ignore that part.
Bianca: Oh, my God!
Babe: My God.
Kendall: You can't.
Bianca: Do I ask you about your sex life with Zach? No. So maybe you should just stop talking.
Babe: But you know, she does -- as much as I hate to say it -- have a valid point. Sex is an important part of a romantic package.
Kendall: Ok, listen, I -- I know we're under a white flag here, and I'm trying really hard not to throw any insults in your direction, but you got to help me out here, ok? So can you please not make yourself an easy target? Can you do that for me, please?
Babe: You're the one that brought it up. All I'm saying is lovemaking is important.
Kendall: Ah, ah! Your theories on lovemaking -- yours -- I don't want to know them.
Babe: Oh, my God. Well --
Annie: You forgot this.
Bianca: Oh. Thanks.
Annie: Hey, I know I'm the newbie-stranger-person Kendall's just beginning to tolerate here. But what you're doing -- going after the woman you love, making her feel special, not knowing what's on the other side -- it takes a lot of courage. I think it's great.
Bianca: You and Ryan did the whole whirlwind-romance thing. What was the most romantic thing he ever did?
Annie: The biggest, most romantic moment of my life -- Ryan dumping me in a tub of oatmeal.
Bianca: I really hope that's some kind of euphemism.
Annie: I -- I was at my lowest of my low with my chickenpox. I was covered in spots --
Annie: And calamine lotion. I didn't want Ryan to even look at me. But of course, he wouldn't take no for an answer. And the spots, fever, itching, scratching -- Ryan threw me in a tub of oatmeal, and he took care of me. And then when it was over, he thanked me. That's -- that's when I knew he really loved me.
Bianca: Wow. Well, Zoe and I are nowhere near oatmealville.
Bianca: I just want her to know that I'm ready to see where this goes.
Annie: Well, when she sees your smile, she'll get it.
Krystal: Oh, stupid battery. Oh. Oh.
Krystal: Babe? Babe, is that you? J.R.? Oh, God -- Tad? Winnie? Anybody, help me! I need help! Oh, God -- God, please -- don't make me have this baby alone.
Zoe: Oh, it's part of the protocol. Can't pass go without it. Discuss banking sperm.
Ryan: Yeah. Just in case you ever want to have --
Zoe: Mm-hmm, little bundles of me? With someone else's help, of course. But the further I'm into transition -- um -- the plumbing will become useless. Happy day and thank the gods. But I don't know why I just can't check "No, thank you" and be done with it.
Ryan: Oh, because that's not an option?
Zoe: Well, they want me to have a choice. But as far as me wanting to use the stuff is in the "never going to happen" category.
Ryan: Oh. You know, that's exactly where I was. Parenthood -- never going to happen, and now, here I am, hoping that it can happen again. Hmm. We are sort of here for the same reason, after all.
Kendall: I'm sorry. I -- I didn't mean to go off on you. Whatever you and Zoe do or don't do is --
Kendall: None of my business.
Bianca: It's ok. I mean, you were just concerned.
Kendall: I just want you happy. And if you don't get to -- I -- I just -- I just want you to be happy, that's all.
Babe: She will be. And great sex isn't always about mechanics or equipment. It's about connecting and doing what makes each other feel good.
Kendall: Ok, I don't want any more detail. the last thing I need is a visual of you with my brother. Or J.R., for that matter. And there's the visual now.
J.R.: May I have a moment with my -- can I have a word with Babe, please?
Aidan: You went looking for her?
Di: She wasn't hard to find.
Aidan: I thought we discussed this.
Di: Ava needs help, Aidan.
Aidan: This is about a hell of a lot more than Ava, and you know it.
Ava: What's wrong, Devane? Ticked because your little woman didn't follow all your orders?
Aidan: You need a doctor?
Ava: I don't care how he makes his money, as long as he carries cash, and lots of it.
Aidan: Huh. Went for one wallet too many, did you?
Ava: Oh, this? Just a love tap. I've had way worse.
Di: Listen, I couldn't leave her there.
Aidan: It's easy, Di. You just turn around, and you walk away. We have two little kids that live in this house.
Di: The kids aren't here.
Aidan: And what about Jonathan? Huh? How do you think he's going to feel when he comes in and he sees her? How do you think that's going to go?
Di: Ava, why don't you go make yourself a sandwich? If you just go around this -- this corner, it's the hallway, you know, big door right to your left.
Ava: Ok. Don't get in too much trouble, Mom and Dad.
Aidan: She needs to go back to where she came from. She's not going anywhere near Lily, all right?
Di: So we just throw her back?
Aidan: Look, I get it, Di, all right? You -- you look at Ava, you see yourself -- on the streets being taken advantage of. But you're not Ava. All she cares about is herself. She will ruin Lily, and she'll never look back.
Di: Ok. Well, what about Ava's feelings? It's ok to just hurt her?
Aidan: You want to help her? We'll drive her over to the Miranda Center. But I want her out of this house, now!
Lily: These need to be signed. I already dated them.
Zach: Ok. Thank you, Lily. You all right?
Lily: Yes, thank you for the closet. It was very effective.
Zach: You're doing a great job.
Lily: Thanks. I double-checked the Revan numbers and readjusted the amortization schedule, and you have an appointment with Walter Byrum in 43 minutes.
Zach: Ok. I got a question for you. Why are you still here?
Josh: You haven't hired me yet.
Zach: Well, because tormenting J.R. seems to take up most of your time.
Josh: Well, what better way to mix business and pleasure? You know, Adam Chandler gave me a crash course in leveling the company he built. Just a matter of execution.
Zach: Bring down Chandler on your own time. I have a business to run.
Josh: You know, I respect you, Zach. You helped save Babe. You didn't have to do it, but you did. And you went after your own father.
Zach: He killed people.
Josh: Yeah, well, I have experience with deranged fathers. Doesn't make it any easier. You're a standup guy. You're a man of your word. I could work for you.
Zach: I thought you were a doctor. Go save the world or something, why don't you?
Josh: Yeah, well, I might do that someday. But I have plenty of experience in business, and this is what I want to do. I'm ready.
Zach: No. Thanks for stopping by.
Josh: You forget who I am. I'm Kendall's brother and Erica's son. You think I'm going to give up that easy?
Erica: You're selling the yacht?
Jack: We are selling the yacht. That was the agreement. Sell it and split the proceeds. Is there a problem?
Erica: Well, no. No, I -- I -- I just didn't expect that the yacht would be sold so quickly.
Jack: Well, the buyer should be here anytime. There he is now.
[Krystal groans as she hears a noise and crawls out the door]
Krystal: What? Oh -- oh, please -- please be there. Oh. Oh, please. Oh. Oh -- oh --
Colby: Holy --
Krystal: Colby -- Colby, thank God. This baby is on the way. Colby, I need you to call the paramedics and then come in here and help me. I'm having this baby right here. Uh -- Colby? Get a grip, now. Come on, now -- I need you to help me. I need you to focus.
Colby: Where's Babe, or Winnie? She'd be great at something like this.
Krystal: Babe's at work and Winnie is with Little A. It's just you and me.
Colby: Uh -- J.R., Tad?
Krystal: J.R. is at work and Tad had an emergency.
Colby: My dad -- what about him?
Krystal: Your daddy left me to have this baby on the floor right here.
Colby: Why are you even still here? You're supposed to be at the Valley Inn, and the baby's not due for another two weeks.
Krystal: Ok, look, I am here and this baby is not waiting for a moving van.
Adam: Aren't you going to congratulate me?
Erica: Are you planning a cruise, Adam? I hear the Arctic is very nice this time of year.
Adam: Uh-huh. Uh -- another -- it may not leave the slip. I just want it -- in case.
Jack: Ok, then, shall we? Adam, right there.
Jack: Ok, that's it, then. The "At Last" is history. You can call it anything you want, Adam.
Adam: I'm done naming things.
Jack: Well, enjoy. I need to get back to work. I will call you -- we'll talk about the proceeds.
Erica: You slime. You don't give a damn about my yacht. This is payback. I wouldn't put your tramp wife and her tramp daughter in prison, so you pull this.
Adam: I don't have a wife. I don't have a son. I don't have a baby daughter. But I do have a yacht. Was ever a man so blessed?
J.R.: I just wanted to let you know that Slater went after the company. He did some damage. You hear that, Kendall? Your husband's jerking around Chandler Enterprises.
Kendall: Oh, boo-flippity-hoo.
J.R.: Oh, really? Because your partner here, Babe, happens to have a lot of stock in the company. Way to have her back, great job. Yeah!
Kendall: Wait a minute. Hey, do you guys hear that? That little -- hmm, that's very annoying. I think I have to fumigate -- gnats.
Babe: Well, thank you for letting me know, I guess.
J.R.: Well, take care of yourself.
Babe: I will.
J.R.: I better head back to the office.
Josh: I'm not going anywhere. I've worked in medicine, media, and finance. My résumé's golden, top of the game in every field. I could be a major asset to Cambias.
Zach: Uh-huh. You have attention-span problems. Do you really think I'm going to train you, pay you for six months, just to see you get bored?
Josh: Ok, how about a trial period? Set up a time frame, see how it goes. When it's up, either one of us can back out.
Zach: Oh. Ok. Um -- I'm the boss, I can back out whenever I want.
Josh: Ok. You got me -- two years, firm.
Zach: Lily? Send in Hannah, please.
Hannah: Are you ready for the meeting with -- hello again.
Zach: This is Josh, a new hire. He'll be reporting to you.
Hannah: Welcome to the team.
Josh: Shall we get started?
Aidan: She's gone.
Di: Well, you acted like an ass. She probably bolted. Are you happy now? Are you happy now that this scary street kid is out of the house?
Ryan: I didn't want to be a father. I didn't -- ever. In fact, I wrote it off for all sorts of reasons, had the surgery to make sure there were no surprises, and here I am. I'm here ready to discuss having the procedure reversed.
Ryan: Yeah, exactly. Surprise. I mean, you and I are in very different places, but it's about the same thing. It's about having choices.
Zoe: Yeah, and I respect your decision, but I just don't think it's an option for me, and that's -- I have a lovely transgender parent in my support group, but I'm about as fit to parent a cactus. And the rock-star thing, you know -- families and settling down, it wasn't even a blip on the map. Plus, there's the misery of a lifetime of hiding from yourself -- myself -- and the world and that made me want to avoid diapers and burping even more. I mean, just picture me as a mother -- absurd.
Ryan: Ha. Well, I don't know. I mean, I -- I didn't want anybody ever calling me "Dad." I definitely didn't, but then there was Spike and then Emma and -- and Annie -- Annie, a woman that I love, at I would love to have a child with someday.
Zoe: Sounds lovely, really. But I don't think that I'll ever be in that position -- wanting a child with a woman who wants to have one with me.
Ryan: Things change. Me being here is proof of that. What if you do find that woman someday, or she finds you? You might wish that you'd given yourself a chance.
[As Zoe nods in agreement, Bianca finishes wrapping a lovely gift]
Nurse: Mr. Lavery?
Ryan: Hmm -- oh.
Adam: Maybe I do need a trip. Just cast off and sail away to some far-off -- lagoon. Just disappear -- no more Pine Valley, no more secrets. No more lies. At last -- huh. Maybe I'll keep the name.
Erica: Don't let them break you.
Adam: Why in blazes would I do that? You've got my money, we're done.
Erica: You, the great Adam Chandler -- you did the impossible. You finally gave your heart to a woman.
Erica: Not a piece, not a corner, but the whole thing. With no motives and no expectations, you just loved. You just trusted. You were betrayed.
Colby: I don't know many centimeters she's dilated, and I'm not going to find out. Just get here.
Colby: No, I don't care if there's an accident on the Interstate.
Colby: A woman is going to have a baby --
Colby: Right now!
Colby: I have to "what"? No, I couldn't even cut up a frog in biology. No way am I delivering a baby.
Krystal: God -- oh. Oh, oh. Colby, how long till they get here?
Colby: What a bunch of idiots.
Krystal: Oh. Ok, ok. We have to get ready.
Colby: That's a great idea. I will go wait out front for the paramedics, and I'll leave more messages for Babe and J.R. Everything's going to be fine.
Krystal: Colby, Colby, you hold it right there! You're not going anywhere.
Colby: Oh, oh no, what --
Krystal: Colby, it's not as bad as all that. Come on, babies are born every day.
Colby: Yeah, not in front of me.
Krystal: Well, I know. Look, this isn't exactly the way I planned it, either, but this is the way it is. Colby -- Colby? Come on, come on. Ok, all right. My hand -- see? With you here, I'm not -- I'm not so afraid. You can do this. I have total faith in you, Colby.
Colby: No. Don't say that. I am a total a screwup and everybody knows it.
Colby: I crash boats, and I go on joy rides, Krystal.
Krystal: No, no, no. You are strong. You're strong, and you're smart. You have heart, and you have brains, ok? And my baby and I are going to be just fine, because you are here, ok? Come on, you can do this. You -- you can do this. You can do this. Come on. Come on, say it. Say it with me. You can do this.
Colby: I can do this. I can do this.
Krystal: You "can" do this.
Colby: I can do this.
Krystal: Right. Ok.
Colby: I can do this.
Krystal: Yeah. That's my girl. That's my girl -- oh! God -- Colby?
Erica: You think they've won, but I know you. You can't lose -- it's impossible. You won't get on that yacht and cast off and disappear. You will stay, you will fight, and you will win. You can ignore me, you can try to ignore me. That's ok, you do that. But I won't leave. I'm not going anywhere until you remember the man you are, until you choose to win again, and you will.
Adam: You can't fool me. You're just trying to get your damn yacht back.
Erica: Hmm. You're back.
Adam: I was never gone.
Erica: I should've charged you double.
[Erica and Adam hold hands]
Babe: Um -- these need to be redone. There's too much bleeding on the edges.
Bianca: You know, it's hard to end a relationship, any -- any relationship. It's hard to accept that it's over. So if you need anything -- I mean, like an ear, a shoulder, some ice cream --
Kendall: You know, there are all kinds of upsides, Babe. I mean, divorce opens up a brand-new world of possibility for you. Just imagine now -- you and J.R., you're free to torture a whole new slew of prospective people.
Babe: Well, I don't think I'll be ready for love or torture for a long time. So it's up to you, Bianca, to have enough romance for the both of us.
[Zoe and Bianca exchange knowing glances]
Ava: I was tired!
Aidan: Yeah, it's hard to sleep while you're rummaging through someone else's jewelry box.
Ava: What are you talk -- I wasn't doing anything!
Aidan: Look -- what did you take?
Ava: I didn't take anything, Devane!
Di: Hey, chill out, both of you.
Aidan: No, I'll chill when she hands it over -- where is it?
Ava: No, no. I'm out of this.
Aidan: Where is it?
Di: Wait, wait, wait!
Ava: No, I didn't take anything! Stop -- look -- get --
Aidan: You've left me no choice!
Ava: Stop touching me! Get off!
Di: Aidan, please!
Aidan: Where is it?
Di: Just chill for a second!
Ryan: The wedding date is set.
Zoe: Ok, please promise me you'll take firm control over the wardrobe requirements. Your groom here has it in his mind to wear a purple tie.
Zoe: Some tribute to purple tea or purple coffee or --
Ryan: Go on. Go on, laugh.
Zoe: Oh, with you, darling --
Zoe: Unless you wear the tie. And if he wants to wear matching socks, run.
Ryan: Ah -- are you kidding me? You going to let Zoe get away with that?
Annie: She does have a point.
Ryan: Ha! That's it -- we're out of here! Come on, let's go.
Annie: Hey, what do you think about a snow cone machine at the reception?
Ryan: Now, we're really going. We're going. Where's your purse? We'll take that. Thank you very much.
Bianca: Wait, wait, wait, wait! I'm -- I'm coming with you. Hold the elevator.
Kendall: Wait a minute -- wait. No, the workday is not over. The workday is still going on.
Bianca: I have some errands to run, ok? Bye.
Kendall: Oh -- all this romance is giving me indigestion.
Babe: So, my dear, another gift --
Babe: From your secret admirer.
Zoe: Or my stalker. Poor misguided creature really needs to get a life.
Babe: Maybe it's a big, beautiful life that you could be a part of.
Zoe: It's sad.
Babe: It's sweet.
Zoe: "Zoe, meet me at the Yacht Club on the terrace."
Zoe: Oh. "Ma Vie En Rose." This is one of my favorite songs -- so beautiful and simple. You can understand it without even really knowing the words. And the movie is one of my favorites.
Babe: I didn't even know that there was a movie.
Zoe: It's about a little boy who knew she was a little girl. Witty -- they did their research. I hope they're enjoying themselves.
Babe: Maybe it's someone who understands what you're going through.
Zoe: Or not.
Babe: Look, please don't blow this off. Just go. Go to the Yacht Club and then if you don't like what you see, you can just walk away, forget it ever happened. Come on.
Zoe: Ok. I'm curious. But when this blows up in my face -- and it will -- I blame you.
Josh: Cambias needs to get involved with anything related to IT, especially data-leak prevention. Market's supposed to balloon to about $435 million by 2009. Now, we can ride that -- am I going too fast for you?
Hannah: I'm just marveling in that you assume I care about your opinion. You obviously think you're very intelligent and experienced, but if you were either, you'd keep your mouth shut and listen. Maybe you'll learn something.
Krystal: Oh. Breathe, breathe.
Krystal: Whew. Oh.
Colby: My hands washed. I got towels, and I got blankets for the baby.
Krystal: Ok. Hey, get the scissors, in the -- in the drawer behind you. Come on.
Colby: I can do this.
Colby: Are these ok?
Colby: Ok. What's this bulb thing for?
Krystal: In case we need to clear the baby's airway.
Colby: Ok. You -- do you need anything else?
Krystal: Just you, just you. Just talk to me.
Colby: Ok. Babies are born every day, not a big deal.
Colby: Are these shoelaces ok?
Krystal: Mm-hmm. Yeah, they're fine. They're great. You're doing great. So just hang on, peanut. Hang on.
Colby: Whew -- ok. I'm ready to do this, swear, but the paramedics have to be close, right? I mean, really close.
Krystal: Oh, I don't know, I don't know, but this is my little girl's party, and I don't think she's going to wait on any stragglers. Oh! God! Oh -- oh, oh, oh, oh. You can do this. You can do it.
Colby: No, you --
Krystal: You do it.
Colby: You can do this.
Colby: You can do this.
Krystal: Yeah. Yeah -- oh, oh, yeah. We're going to have some story to tell that little one, aren't we?
Colby: You know, maybe we should start singing the "beer bottle on the wall" song.
Krystal: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah -- oh! Oh!
Colby: It's ok.
Krystal: Oh. The baby's almost here, Colby!
>> On the next "all my children" --
Kendall: I need you to get rid of someone for me.
Kendall: My sister.
Colby: What's wrong? What's happening?
Krystal: I'm having a contraction, but I'm not going to push until you get the baby unstuck.
Colby: Baby, please come out.
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