All My Children Transcript Monday 9/25/06
Provided By Boo
Proofread by Gisele
[The music box plays and Kendall sighs as she watches over her sweet baby.]
Kendall: Ok. How about I make a deal with you? You go to sleep in the very, very near future, I will stand by your bedside and protect you all night long. We have a deal, my little munchkin? Hmm. I love you, Ryan. I mean, Spike. I meant Spike -- love you, Spike. But, I mean, I love your daddy, too -- I do. I just -- oh. Oh, God. Oh. Hmm. Oh. I told Ryan to his face that I love him. I -- that was stupid. I should've never done that. But it's true. I do love Ryan. And I still love Zach, too. Ugh. Oh, Spike. What is your crazy mom going to do now?
Ryan: That's good stuff.
Ryan: Thank you.
Annie: Oh, least I could do.
Ryan: Ah. Ahem.
Annie: Want to talk about it?
Ryan: Ah. Define "it."
Annie: Why the long face?
[Ryan sighs while standing at ConFusionís bar.]
Ryan: No, I was just -- I was just thinking about an old bar joke, actually.
Annie: Oh, no.
Annie: "Horse walks into a bar and --"
Ryan: No. No. Skeleton walks into a bar, and he says to the bartender, "Give me a beer and a mop."
Annie: Oh, God.
Ryan: Oh, that's not a good one, either.
Annie: No, it's, uh, good.
Jonathan: Hey. Hi, hi, hi --
Jonathan: Hi. I haven't seen you around in a little while. What'd you do, take a couple hours off?
Amanda: I wish. No, I was in the office up to my earrings in paperwork. Oh, it's really gotten crazy in there since -- it's just out of hand.
Jonathan: Lily was a huge help around here, but, you know, she's gone now, so you and I, we're going to have to learn how to deal with it, right? Because life goes on without Lily. There's no other choice.
Del: Hey. Is this Jamieís jacket?
Julia: Yeah, looks like it.
Del: Do you mind giving it back to him?
Di: You seem pretty ticked off at your dad tonight. You know he's lying, don't you, Jamie? Dixie never buried a man alive.
Sydney: Oh, my God, Colby, you're alive! I can't even believe that you're ok! Oh, my God, you're alive.
[Sydney sees Colbyís hide-away in the wall.]
Sydney: You lying, cheating bitch.
[In the kiddie pool on Fusionís roof terrace, Josh and Babe give in to their passion while in the office downstairs, J.R. rings Babeís phone and finds it sitting on her desk.]
Kendall: Aw. Oh. Betrayal. Yeah, you hear me. That's a heck of a thing to deal with, Spikey. Zach betrayed me. But I still love him so much. Only now, I love Ryan, too. But would I feel this way about Ryan if Zach hadn't let me down? I don't know. God help me, I don't know.
Ryan: I came here to have a good time and that's -- that's exactly what I'm going to do.
Annie: Cool. Well, then, let's get to it. Oh, you don't think I'm going to let you have a good time without me?
[Hearing J.R. coming, Babe wraps a cloth around herself while Josh hides in the foliage.]
J.R.: Babe. Why are you naked? And where did this pool come from?
Babe: This? It's -- it's probably from some old photo shoot. The -- the air conditioning, it -- oh, it automatically shut off a while ago and I got super stuffy, so I took my clothes off and I wrapped up in this satin cloth and I just -- I came up here to cool off.
J.R.: Where's Josh?
Babe: Well, he went home hours ago.
Sydney: What is this anyway, a tunnel or something? You're living in your walls?
Colby: Ok, just promise you will not tell anyone you saw me, not until you heard my side of things.
Sydney: Do you think you could even try to justify this? What you're doing is evil, Colby.
Colby: Ok, hear me out. I got so wasted the night of our party. I still cannot believe I tried to outrun the harbor patrol on a yacht.
Sydney: Do -- do you have any clue how many people got hurt, me being one of them?
Colby: No one died, right?
Sydney: You mean other than you? No, but they could have, and I definitely could have.
Colby: It was an accident. I did not mean to crash the boat. I even heard the police say that they're going to press charges on me if I'm found alive. They want me in prison, Sydney.
Sydney: Well, maybe that's where you should be. You know, your poor dad is out there right now trying to fish your body out of the ocean, and you're in here stocking up on sunflower seeds and sodas?
Colby: Ok, trust me, my father is better off thinking I am dead. You know, he'd rather see I was gone than face a million lawsuits and then see another kid go to jail.
Sydney: You're unbelievable.
Colby: No. I am dead, and I'm staying that way.
Kendall: You can't love Zach and Ryan. You can't have them both.
Ryan: Yes, you can.
Annie: Nope, not for a second, so you can -- you can beg me, you can tempt me, you can threaten me, whatever, but I am not getting on your motorcycle with you and that is final.
Ryan: You're chicken.
Annie: Excuse me. I will have you know that I have a very serious condition. Have you ever heard of -- of bicyclephobia?
Ryan: No. No. All right, fine. No chopper, no, fine. You're -- you're clear. You got any other ideas for our wild night?
Annie: Come here. Come here.
[Annie whispers into Ryanís ear.]
Jamie: Well, my dad says Dixieís the one who's changed --
Jamie: That she's the one who's lying.
Di: Ok, Jamie, to a certain extent, your father is right. Losing Kate did change Dixie. But, you know, if she could go back in time and do things differently, you know, I'm sure she'd do that. But Tad doesn't see all these regrets she has. All he sees right now is that she is not the angel that he wished on a star with all those years ago. But he is making her pay for that for the rest of her life.
Jamie: What about you, Di? At one point, you were ready to become Mrs. Tad Martin, and then he dumped you. How much of this is about you wanting to make him pay?
Di: That's ridiculous. She's my sister, Jamie, and I'm trying to protect her.
Jamie: Well, you -- you keep telling me that my father is lying --
Di: He is.
Jamie: But you have no proof.
Julia: Hey, Di, what are you talking to him about? I told you he has enough to worry about without --
Jamie: Hey, I'm -- I'm sorry, but, Julia, did I ask for your help? I can handle my own problems. We're over. Remember?
Julia: Yeah. I remember. "No hard feelings" -- isn't that what you said? Here. You left your jacket at the bar.
Amanda: Hey. Why don't you take a break, go grab a bite, and I will cover if Del gets backed up.
Jonathan: Del, I think, yeah, can handle the bar on his own.
Amanda: Just in case.
Jonathan: Well --
Amanda: What are you still doing here? Would you leave already?
Jonathan: I want you to come with me.
Erin: I am so weird.
Jamal: Lucky for you, I like weird.
Erin: Um -- you sure you're not just looking for a reason to bolt, because I sure as heck would be.
Jamal: Nah. I love hanging out with you, Erin. In fact, I wish I could do it more often.
Jamal: Actually, I have two tickets to the Roots next week if you're down.
Erin: Jamal? Are you -- are you asking me to --
Jamal: Out, Erin. I'm asking you out.
Babe: Come on, J.R. Stop messing around.
J.R.: God, Babe. I want to make love to you right now.
Ryan: No, there's no -- there's no possible way that you're going to get me to do karaoke, like, ever.
Annie: This is pretty sad, that two young, fun people like ourselves can't agree on a single way to get wild.
Ryan: Ok, just -- just so you know, karaoke doesn't even compare to motorcycles on the wild scale.
Annie: Do you have any better ideas?
Ryan: Actually, yeah, I got a good one.
J.R.: Sorry, I didn't mean to come on so strong. I just saw you in the pool and, I don't know. You look so beautiful. It's just something -- so radiant.
Babe: J.R., don't.
J.R.: Babe? I love you. I hope you know that.
Babe: I can't do this right now.
[After J.R. and Babe leave, Josh comes out of hiding and recalls the hot time he just shared with her in the kiddie pool.]
Sydney: Right. So it's not enough you're letting your family think you're dead -- now you're going to rob them?
Colby: It's my money, too, technically. I bet Krystal convinced my dad to change the combination. We both want me out of here, right?
Colby: And the only way I could leave Pine Valley is if I have some cash, so you can help me out and get the combination in the safe. I could --
Sydney: Oh, my God, are you high?
Colby: Sydney, think of the benefits. You won't ever have to see me again, you can have my computer, my jewelry, my clothes.
Sydney: No, and the entire time, I'd be scamming your family, so forget it. And after what you did to me that night of our party, I --
Colby: You know, I said I was sorry for hurting your arm, ok?
Sydney: I don't care about my stupid arm. You did it with Sean when you knew he was mine. So you can kiss your stupid escape plan good-bye.
[As the music box plays, Kendall dreams about her husband.]
Kendall: Hmm. Hmm. You're home. I missed you.
Zach: I'm always here, even when I'm not.
Kendall: You're here now.
Zach: I'll never leave you, never let you go. I love you, Mrs. Slater.
Kendall: I love you, Mr. Slater.
[Suddenly Zachís face turns into Ryanís.]
Ryan: I love you, Kendall.
Kendall: I love you, Ryan. I -- I can't love you both.
Ryan: You found a way to make it work.
[Walking out in the courtyard, Kendall eerily watches herself kissing Zach.]
Ryan: Time to feed Spike.
Derek: Time for justice, Kendall.
Kendall: Oh. No. No! You said you'd never leave me.
Zach: You can't love us both.
Ryan: Our son. Let's go see our son, Kendall.
Kendall: No. I do. I love you both.
Zach: I fixed it so you won't have to.
[Kendall frantically tries to release Zach from the electric chair.]
Kendall: No! No! Please let him go. Let him go. Please let him go.
Zach: Shh. Blackouts -- that's when I want you to remember me. When the lights go out, think of me.
Kendall: No -- Zach! Zach, please, don't let this happen, please!
Zach: Remember I love you.
Kendall: No. Let go of me, let go of me. Let go. No, no. No, wait a minute. Please, please, no, no! No, please don't! No, Zach! Oh, my God! Ryan. Oh.
[Kendall panics and screams while Zach is electrocuted, then wakes up.]
Sydney: Don't tell me having sex with Sean was an accident. I'll buy that you didn't mean to crash his uncle's boat, but I know what a slut you are.
Colby: How could I be a slut if it was my first time? I seriously thought it would be amazing, that we'd do it and --
Colby: I'd know right then and there why everyone makes such a big deal about sex. But I didn't feel amazing. I didn't even feel ok. No, it didn't make me any better, any cooler, or hotter. It was just weird, depressing. You know, I don't know. Maybe I was just too drunk to get it, but before I could figure out what happened, we were finished, and Sean was like, "Oh, that was cool." But I was thinking to myself, "What the hell did I just do?"
[Front door closes]
Colby: Oh -- oh, no. Sydney, someone's coming. Please, please, do not narc me -- no, I'm begging you, please!
[Colby runs and hides in the secret tunnel, leaving all her stuff behind.]
Babe: What's all this?
J.R.: Sydney? What's going on?
Jonathan: Thank you.
Amanda: You're welcome. Ok, this is the part where you tell me why you're thanking me.
Jonathan: For being a wonderful friend -- to me, and to Lily.
Amanda: You both mean a lot to me, and I hope that I'm always friends with you and Lily even though -- hmm --
Jonathan: "Hmm, hmm."
Jonathan: Always you with the self-editing. Donít. Ok? You can say Lilyís name. You can talk about us breaking up. It -- it happened. It's real. It just -- it seems -- it seems weird to -- to pretend that it didnít.
Amanda: I know, but I -- I just know how much you love her.
Jonathan: Hey. I'm ok. Thank you.
Amanda: What are you thanking me for this time?
Jonathan: Caring, about me.
Amanda: I do.
Jamal: You're still getting over Aidan. I shouldn't have talked date so soon. Sorry.
Jamal: "Yes" no date, "yes" you're still stuck on Aidan?
Erin: Yes. I -- I would like to go to the show with you.
Erin: Yes, excellent.
[Annie laughs as she stacks glasses full of whiskey.]
Annie: Come on.
Erin: What -- oh. My brother has lost his mind.
Ryan: Careful, careful, careful, careful -- yeah!
Ryan: I'm going to catch them in case it falls.
Annie: All right. Oh!
Ryan: Oh, my God -- success.
Annie: Thank you. Whoo!
Ryan: I am very impressed.
Ryan: High-five. Ow. Oh, I'm ok.
Annie: Oh, sorry.
Ryan: I'm good, nice. Ah. Wow.
Annie: So, now what?
Ryan: Well, now -- now we dismantle it, you know?
Annie: Whoo, whoo.
Ryan: Oh, no, no, no. We -- we do shots of whiskey as we dismantle it, and the person who has the most shots wins. Go ahead.
Ryan: Do it.
Annie: Ok. Cheers.
Ryan: Yeah. Ready? Go -- got that one? Nice.
Annie: Ah -- whoo!
Ryan: Ah -- all right.
Annie: Ok, I give up. You win.
Ryan: After one shot?
Annie: Added to the two drinks I already had, yes.
Annie: What can I say? I'm a lightweight.
Ryan: Yeah? Well, it's a good thing because if --
Ryan: You hadn't have bailed out there, I was going to bail out next, so --
Annie: Ryan and Annie.
Annie: Watch out for those two. She won't ride a bike.
Ryan: Right, and he won't sing karaoke.
Annie: They won't get plastered.
Ryan: Totally out of control.
Annie: Oh. I'm going to miss you.
Ryan: So you're -- that's it? Like, you've decided to leave Pine Valley?
Annie: Yeah. It's time for Emma and me to move on, start over.
Ryan: Don't go.
[Colby hides in the secret tunnel and listens.]
Sydney: So then my Aunt Winnie told me that I had to clean out the pantry and the linen closets and throw out the old food and store anything that's double -- you know, like double blankets or double towels or whatever, just doubles. Anyway, I just, um, kind of sort of put it off all day, because I was busy with the stuff, and so here I am just doing what I have to do, hoping that Aunt Winnie won't find out and punish me even more for drinking on the boat. Um -- but I just kind of prefer working at night when it's peaceful, you know? But, um, yeah, that kind of explains all this junk being here.
Sydney: You guys won't tell Aunt Winnie, right?
J.R.: We won't say anything. Listen, has my father checked in? Any word on Colby?
Sydney: Uh -- no. Sorry, nothing, but, yeah, I better finish up and get to bed.
Sydney: Oh. Thank you.
Babe: You got it?
Sydney: Yeah. Hmm. Night.
Babe: Good night. That was a little weird, but I'm going to bed.
J.R.: No, Babe. That's not the only weirdness that's going on around here.
Kendall: Josh? What are you -- come in.
Josh: No, you know what? Forget -- forget you saw me. This was a bad idea.
Kendall: No, please, please, don't go, Josh. I mean, you obviously need to talk to someone, so come on in. It's Babe, isn't it?
Josh: Someone needs to blow up that marriage.
Kendall: By "someone," you mean you.
Babe: J.R., I've had a really long night. I -- I just need to go to bed.
J.R.: Babe, I meant what I said at Fusion. I love you. I need you.
Babe: Why? J.R., why -- why do you need me now when a few hours ago, you wanted nothing to do with me?
J.R.: That's not true. I was distracted. I -- I was worried about Colby.
Babe: We all are, and I was trying to help you and you blew me off. And now it's -- now it's "I need you, Babe"? Where the heck did that come from? Is it because you found me naked in the pool? Well, I'm glad that I could give you a little thrill, J.R., but I'm not your on-call hooker.
J.R.: Oh, my gosh. Where -- where did that come from?
Babe: I am your wife. I am not some toy that you can take out and play with whenever you're in the mood.
J.R.: I don't know what's gotten into you tonight, Babe.
Babe: You want to know? You really want to know? Fine. I'll tell you. You really want to know, J.R.? You want to know what got into me tonight? What -- what's changed? What's got me so wound up? So freaked out? Are you sure you want to know?
J.R.: Well, I asked you, didn't I?
Babe: It's you. You get in my head, you mess with me, you make me doubt myself, and doubt us, and it totally infuriates me.
J.R.: I never meant to upset you.
Babe: No, of course not. I mean, you never do. You just -- you want me to be this good little wife who makes sure that our son is fed and happy, and sit back and say nothing and do nothing while your entire universe implodes.
J.R.: Wow. I'm sorry.
Babe: And "I'm sorry, Babe" is about as played out as "I don't need you, Babe." So save it.
J.R.: I can't change who I am.
Babe: Oh -- please -- please tell me that that did not just come out of your mouth right now. The guy who beats drugs, who beats his alcohol addiction has the nerve to tell me that he can't change? No. No, no, you don't want to change this.
J.R.: No, you don't know anything about me. Don't you think if I could, I would? You don't get what it's like to be me.
Babe: What what's like? Talk to me.
J.R.: No, I can't -- I can't -- can't do it. I can't -- can't feel it.
Babe: Feel what?
J.R.: The pain. I can't feel the pain, Babe. If I do, it'll kill me.
Josh: J.R.ís an idiot. He's a total tool. Babe deserves so much better than him.
Kendall: Yeah. Ok, you've said that to me, like, 50,000 times. Now, you didn't come here in the middle of the night just to tell me how much you hate J.R. So why don't you tell your big sister what happened tonight?
Josh: Kendall, why do you do that? Why do you always go to the brother/sister thing? We share DNA. That doesn't make us family, so don't read into this, all right?
Kendall: All right already. I was just under the impression that maybe shared DNA meant siblings. Sorry. By all means, help yourself, mere acquaintance.
Josh: I mean, why does she do it? Why does she keep going back to him? Why does she keep loving someone she knows is going to break her heart?
Kendall: Well, when you get the answer, maybe you can fill me in.
Josh: Look, Kendall, Zach goes on trial tomorrow, for burying -- for burying a man alive. And it's pretty certain he's going to go to prison for a very, very long time. This is not a man you want to hang your future on. You did not ask for my opinion on this, but I'm going to give it to you, anyway, all right? You need to jump off this sinking ship. There is someone way better out there waiting for you. Trust me.
Ryan: You keep telling me reasons why you think that you should leave Pine Valley, and what I'll do is I'll keep telling you why you're wrong.
Annie: Ok -- I came here with major baggage.
Ryan: Which happens to be a prerequisite to come to Pine Valley. I mean, you should have seen the stacks of -- of suitcases that I came here with, ok? So -- hmm.
Annie: Well, I brought Terry here.
Ryan: Which is not your fault that he's a piece of garbage, all right? You are not to blame for that. Is it my turn now? Because you're awfully quiet. Because personally, I can come up with, like, a million reasons why you should stay in Pine Valley. Number one -- Emma loves it here. Number two -- I think you kind of like it here, too. Three -- I don't want to lose you at Cambias. Four -- I don't want to lose you as a friend. Five -- and number five is actually the really -- like, the biggest one, and I think it's really going to convince you. If you stay, I will sing karaoke. And I know you don't want to miss out on that.
Amanda: Come on, she deserved it.
Jonathan: Oh, no.
Jonathan: Thank you, for making me take a break.
Amanda: Thank you, for asking me to join you.
Jonathan: A while back, you said that we could be friends with benefits. Does that offer still stand?
[In answer, Amanda reaches out and fervently kisses Jonathan.]
Babe: You say that the pain will kill you. What pain?
J.R.: I don't know how to explain it. It's this feeling that I've had inside me ever since I can remember. In here. The only way that I can describe it to you is -- it's as if something is living inside of me, waiting to choke me. Making me drown. Always there, ready to pull me under. And sometimes I'm able to get rid of it, numb it. Why do you think that I became an alcoholic? Why do you think I started using drugs, long before my voice ever changed? I would get high every minute of every day if I could, if I could stop from feeling it. And sometimes I feel like it's just going to take over. And a few times it has.
Babe: Why didn't you ever tell me this?
J.R.: Because when I feel it, I can't talk about it. I can't even acknowledge it. I'm afraid it's just too much. I'm -- I'm afraid that it's going to destroy everyone and everything that I care about. How many times have I almost lost you? But I'm going to fight it. I'm going to do whatever it takes to beat it. Because I love you. And I never want to lose you, ever again.
Jamal: If you stay, you can volunteer with me at the Miranda Center. You could make such a difference to so many lives, Annie.
Annie: What did you do, pay them off?
Ryan: I didnít.
Ryan: It was like for -- you know, I used a little bit of, like -- no, honestly, yes, we're coming on a little strong. But only, you know, because we don't want to see you go, that's all.
Annie: I don't know --
Ryan: All right, fine, you know what? She needs some time to think by herself, to think about this alone, so she can weigh all of her options.
Annie: Can I finish, please? Can I finish? I don't know why I ever wanted to leave in the first place. You guys are awesome. We'll stay.
Erin: Oh! All right! All right!
Ryan: We call in the troops, because I knew who to call. I know how to --
Jamal: I look forward to saving lives with you, sister.
Annie: Well, me, too. Me, too.
Ryan: You rock. And you know what? Honestly, Cambias is saved.
Annie: Yeah, right, ok. Oh, oh, oh, oh -- don't -- don't think I forgot your promise.
Annie: You can -- you can start your karaoke concert with "Baby Got Back," ok?
[Erin and Annie laugh]
Kendall: You really want my theory on why Babe stays married to that homicidal maniac? She's an idiot. I had told her so many times that she is making a huge mistake choosing that lunatic over a catch like you. But would she listen to me?
Josh: You said that?
Kendall: Yeah. Well, I consider myself your sister. And that means that I want to see you happy. And I get that being with Babe would make you happy. So I tried to work my magic and make it happen. Obviously, it didn't work, because here you are in the middle of the night drinking wine, freaking out with your heart shattered in a million pieces. And Babe is still eating up the dirt that J.R. is shoveling.
Babe: I had no idea that you felt this way.
J.R.: I'm still trying to figure out how I can handle it without shutting you down. If I could just find the balance -- I will find it. I'll work like hell to make sure that I never close you out ever again. I'm just so sorry that I've hurt you as much as I have. You've been a total saint to me, Babe. You put up with so much of my BS, and you've given me so much in return. You've proven that I can trust you. And after all the hell that I've put you through, you've stood by me, and you've never let me down.
[While J.R. talks, Babe keeps recalling her recent close encounter with Josh.]
Babe: Stop it, J.R. Please, just stop.
Jamie: I'm sorry I didn't want to admit it earlier. But I think you're right. My father is lying. But now it's up to me to prove it.
Di: How do you plan on proving it?
Jamie: I don't know. But if there is any evidence proving Dixieís innocence, you can bet your life I'm going to find it.
Jonathan: That was --
Amanda: Hmm. Yeah, I thought so, too. That's why I don't want it to end. Friends with benefits. It's on.
[Amanda and Jonathan lie on a chaise lounge outside the bar making out.]
Annie: Maybe you missed the part where I said I was a lightweight.
Ryan: Oh, no, I -- I caught every word. Um -- it's just soda.
Ryan: This -- this is to you and Emma staying in Pine Valley, all right? Cheers.
Annie: Ok. Cheers.
Ryan: Oh, by the way -- um -- yeah -- I'm not singing.
Ryan: No -- you remember when I said -- remember when I said I came to Pine Valley with a lot of baggage? Remember that whole, like, spiel? Well, one of the biggest pieces of luggage that I brought was the fact that I was a Class-A con artist.
Ryan: And the whole karaoke thing was part of the con to get you to stay in Pine Valley, so --
Annie: Pretty sneaky, Lavery, but I got to warn you -- I have ways of making men break.
Ryan: Huh. Well, don't count on it.
Ryan: I'm really happy you're staying.
Annie: Me, too.
J.R.: Come to bed with me. Not to hook up. To just be together.
Babe: I can't. I need to be alone right now.
J.R.: I love you, Babe. I know that I messed up. But I'm going to make it up to you. I'm going to make it right, I swear.
Josh: What are you staring at?
Kendall: That look in your eyes. That is pure Kane. I know, because I have seen it a million times staring back at myself in the mirror. You want Babe, and you are going to do whatever it takes to get her. You're going to blow up Babe and J.R.ís marriage, aren't you?
>> On the next "All My Children" --
J.R. (to Tad): Are you really going through with this? Are you going to sentence my mother to life?
Kendall (to Jamie): Please tell me what you know. This is my husband we're talking about.
Ryan (to Kendall): Jamie's not the enemy here.
Kendall (to Ryan): I have to know if I have a future with Zach.
Kendall (to Jamie): Now, tell me what you know.
Krystal (to Babe): Tell me that you did not sleep with Josh.
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