AMC Transcript Wednesday 3/22/06

All My Children Transcript Wednesday 3/22/06


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Babe: J.R.? You did all this?

J.R.: I know -- without talking to you first. Listen, if you don't like it, I can tear it all down, start all over again. I take it that you like it.

Babe: I have never seen anything so beautiful in my whole life.

J.R.: Neither have I.

Adam: Mmm.

Krystal: Ok. Your turn.

Adam: No, no, no, no, no, I want you to take another turn, because I want to trace the movement of your lips.

Krystal: No, no, no. You keep giving me the shivers, and I'm not going to be able to finish breakfast.

Adam: Oh, is that what I give you -- the shivers?

Krystal: Don't act like that's news.

Adam: Marry me, Krystal.

Krystal: I already did.

Adam: No, no, in name only. I want the rest of you. Hmm? The words -- I want the words "to love and to cherish, to have and to hold."

Krystal: Oh, God, yes.

Adam: You'll do it? Will you do it? Huh? A ceremony we'll remember forever.

[Adam laughs]

Krystal: Oh, those darn shivers. Would you just hurry up and kiss your bride, Adam?

Derek: So the DA offered your mother a plea -- no trial, no prison.

Amanda: They'll put her in a hospital, won't they?

Brooke: Well, she needs help, so, I mean, you know she'll get it there.

Derek: If she hadn't refused the deal.

Brooke: She said no?

Derek: If your mother goes to trial, prison's almost guaranteed, and given her crimes, Janet could be looking at a life sentence.

Janet: If you must speak about me, at least have the decency to do it to my face.

Amanda: Why did you have to kill Daddy?

Livia: So will they cut you loose, or are you going to make a break for it?

Jack: Well, drastic -- drastic measures have come to mind.

Livia: You don't want to make that kind of example right now.

Jack: Why don't you just tell me what you're trying so hard not to tell me?

Livia: Lily talked to me.

Jack: Ok. About?

Livia: About getting married.

Jack: Oh, you got to be kidding me.

Lily: I tracked you down.

Jonathan: Lily. Hi. It's good to see you.

Lily: Thanks. Is it ok that I'm talking to you on the job?

Jonathan: Oh, yeah. No, it's more than ok.

Lily: Good, because ever since we agreed to disagree, I enjoy talking to you more than ever.

Jonathan: Well -- well, agree or disagree, Lily, I -- I always want to hear what you have to say.

Lily: Ok, good. I -- I want to talk about getting married -- no matter what anyone else says.

Zach: Hi.

Di: You looking for Dixie, too?

Zach: I own the place.

Di: Sorry. Mind my own business. I just need to know, did she leave town?

Zach: And if she hasn't left town, what are you going to do to make her suffer this time?

Di: I've given up making people suffer, but David Hayward hasn't. He's about to make a hell for my sister that we can't even imagine.

David: [Imitates operator] If this is an emergency, please wait till after I'm on break -- and then feel free to drop dead.

Tad: I hear the only way you were able to slime your way back in here over my father's objections was to blackmail Palmer. Figures. I just wanted to stop by and let you know personally, if you so much as give my dad a case of the hiccups, I'll make it my life's work to have you bumped back to mop jockey -- biohazards and all. Understand?

David: [Normal voice] I saw Dixie yesterday.

Janet: I didn't kill him. I preserved him in a freezer. Some people call it cryogenics, but that's not really what it is. It's cryptogenics. You see, when a person has chronic illness or chronic issues, then they're kept at well below freezing until modern science -- or the wife -- has found a cure for the problem. So, man, problems, freezer -- I followed the guidelines.

Amanda: Mom, what you did -- Dad is dead. He's never coming back.

Janet: If he has been improperly thawed, then we must take that up with the authorities because they, not I, would be the killers. Speaking of killers, I think I'm looking at mine.

Amanda: Mom, no.

Brooke: Janet, I don't think this is the conversation that you want to have right now.

Janet: Oh, you found yourself a new protector? Do you call her "Mom"? You going to kill her, too?

Amanda: You are my mother, the only one, Mom. I never wanted to hurt you. You have to know that.

Janet: You're one of them now. You've joined the enemies.

Amanda: I called the police to protect you.

Janet: Why would they do that?

Derek: Trevor was my friend.

Amanda: There were guns. There were people that wanted Babe and Little Adam home safe and would do anything to make that happen. I was scared. I did not want you hurt!

Janet: They wouldn't hurt me. They just rip out my soul, and they punish me with pills, and they make it so that my head is full of sand and I turn into a mindless lump, and then they throw me in with a bunch of lunatics, and if by some miracle I actually have a lucid moment in this, oh, I shall remember the one who put me into this living hell. I will remember the one I loved above all else -- she was my sweet, loving, loyal daughter.

Livia: This isn't about Jonathan.

Jack: Oh, the hell it isn't. She's been a different child ever since she met that freak show.

Livia: She is not a child anymore.

Jack: Oh -- Livia, you know what the hell I mean, right?

Livia: She asked me how to divorce her father.

Jack: Oh, dear God.

Livia: She's growing up, and she thinks you're trying to hold her back.

Jack: I'm trying to protect her.

Livia: To you -- protect. To her -- control. She's a teenager.

Jack: She's not just any teenager, now, is she, Livia? There's more to it than that, and you know that as well as I do.

Lily: I don't think that's the way your mouth should be turned when we're talking about getting married.

Jonathan: I don't think marriage is a good idea, Lily -- no, the topic, I mean.

Lily: Why not?

Jonathan: We agreed that we would wait until you're 18. That's in May.

Lily: But I want to talk about it now.

Jonathan: I want to wait.

Lily: Great. We're getting very good at agreeing to disagree.

Jonathan: Well, I'm -- I'm very happy that you're not angry, but I -- I still want to wait, Lily.

Lily: Agreed.

David: Same hair, same gorgeous figure -- unmistakable.

Tad: Why is it you can never manage to stop being a complete jerk? Just for five minutes, drop it.

David: Well, it was good while it lasted. That flicker of hope in your eyes -- pitiful.

Tad: Yeah. Hmm. Kind of like the look on Di’s face, huh? I bet you'd love that -- telling her half sister was miraculously alive?

David: Actually, I don't give a damn about you or your Dixie wannabe. All I care about is my daughter, and the fact that she's about to make the worst mistake of her life -- again -- marrying that punk you call a son.

Tad: Is that why you stopped by Wildwind -- take a little test run with Di, make sure you still had it before you tried to ruin J.R. and Babe's wedding?

David: Me? No, never. I'd rather bask in the glow of their love, dine on wedding cake, revel in rose petals -- ooh, I'm sorry. I get hives from romantic clichés.

Tad: You are such a sack.

David: Yeah, and you're such a joke. Look, why don't you go snuggle up with your Dixie blow-up doll, all right? I mean, you're so self-righteous. Do you ever bore yourself to death, or what?

Tad: You know, I could always beat you senseless. Then again, it's a hospital -- somebody might make a mistake, try to save your life.

Di: And that jerk, David, he knows something -- or at least he thinks he does -- and he's fishing like crazy.

Zach: Has he caught anything so far?

Di: No, nothing concrete. But, I mean, the man is obsessed. He's not going to stop till he finds something.

Zach: And what is that, your concern for Dixie?

Di: Yeah. Well, wow, that was good -- cut me down to two feet without even calling me a name.

Zach: Not my intention.

Di: Well, then you got lucky. I mean, if -- if anyone finds out that Dixie is alive, Tad and I are done. Is that what you want to hear? Do I -- do I want us to be done? No, not hardly. So you want to accidentally cut me down again? Go for it.

Zach: I'm not judging you, Di.

Di: Well, her case is still here.

Zach: Well, then maybe she is still here, too. She didn't fill me in on her plans.

[Di sighs]

Di: I don't know. Well, if she comes back here, can you tell her to watch out for David?

Zach: Sure. She did mention that Babe and J.R. are getting married today.

Di: Oh, my God, she's not going to the wedding?

J.R.: All aboard! Two more riders for the love train.

Babe: Good thing Little A’s upstairs -- this is definitely PG-13.

Krystal: We can hear you, you know.

Adam: And we're not about to stop, either.

Krystal: Well, maybe just for a second to -- you know.

Adam: Oh, yes. Yes, that. Uh -- yes, Krystal and I have something to -- a favor to ask and -- you want to ask or should I?

Krystal: Um -- ahem -- well, today is Little A’s birthday and your wedding. Um -- what do you say if Adam and I renewed our vows during your ceremony, kind of make this funky marriage here the real deal?

Babe: Have you lost your mind? Of course, I don't think you're crazy. I just got this big day and butterflies and I -- I kind of need a minute alone with Mama.

Adam: Babe, it's -- it's your day, of course, you and J.R., and it was just a thought. Not a very well-thought-out thought --

Krystal: It was crazy romantic.

Adam: Yeah, well, we don't want to intrude on your day. It's not a done deal at all, so why don't you ladies -- we'll let you work it out.

Babe: Great. Great, thanks. Let's go.

Adam: J.R. -- um -- I'm sorry. I didn't want to intrude on your day, but it's -- lately I've had the urge, I've felt an urge that I should be, well, giving Krystal something more than moonshine and Reverend Willie Wurmwood's blessing.

J.R.: Well, it makes for a good story.

Adam: Yeah, a lousy memory. In fact, I can't remember any of it.

J.R.: Oh, you've got the videotape to prove it.

Adam: Yeah, well, humiliation is a poor substitute for romance.

J.R.: What are you worried about? You got the girl.

Adam: No, she got me, you know, but good. It was -- it was all a con. Krystal set me up! And -- isn't she amazing? Oh.

J.R.: You just admitted that you got suckered, and you're smiling about it. If you would've said this three weeks ago, I would've had you committed.

Adam: And now?

J.R.: And now I'm proud of you.

[Adam laughs]

Adam: Krystal's a great find, son. A true find. When you land a woman like Krystal, you don't want to let her go.

J.R.: You're preaching to the choir.

Babe: Mama, in a few hours, J.R. and I are going to be married. I will be with my son 24/7. You don't have to stay here so I have a way to see him.

Krystal: Sweetheart, you and that baby are the -- the whipped cream on my sundae. You know I would do anything for you.

Babe: I know that, but that doesn't mean that you have to keep continuing to pretend to care about him.

Krystal: Let me finish. I'd do anything for you, you are the whipped cream. But Adam is my sprinkles -- maybe even the nuts.

[Krystal laughs]

Babe: Mama, do you mean you really --

Krystal: Honey, love is just as contagious as the bird flu -- and a heck of a lot more fun.

Babe: No, no, no, no, you feel fine, but your eyes -- look at me -- your eyes have changed color.

Krystal: Yeah, well, that happens now and then.

Babe: No, no, when "now and then," because I've never seen it.

Krystal: Well, "then" was the first time I held you in my arms. And "now"? That would be Adam’s fault.

Babe: Mama, you really do love him.

Krystal: Oh, God, help me. It's been there for a while in the air. I've shrugged it off. "Who, me? Who, him?" Well, honey, you're -- you're a prime example. You dared yourself to take a shot at the big time and at big love. Now, no way am I going to let you be braver than your mama. It's time for me to -- to step up.

Babe: But you could get hurt.

Krystal: Yeah, true enough.

Babe: And you really want to take that chance?

Krystal: Sweetie, the way I feel about that man, I'm not sure I have a choice.

Babe: Oh, what happened to us Carey girls?

Krystal: The Chandler men. It's in the genes!

Amanda: I tried to tell you so many times, but you wouldn't listen. I didn't want anyone to get hurt, especially not you.

Janet: You just want me gone, out of sight, after everything I've done for you.

Amanda: You loved me so much, and you couldn't stand for people not to like me, so you thought you could fix things, Mom, but you only made them worse.

Janet: It suited your purposes.

Amanda: I should've done something, I should've stopped you sooner. I love you, Mom. I am always going to love you.

Janet: How easily that lie comes out of your mouth. You're one of them now. You are not my Mandy, you are not my daughter. You're just some girl who ruined my life.

Brooke: That's enough.

J.R.: Now, if this is a way to screw over Krystal --

Adam: No.

J.R.: Or a way to screw up my wedding with Babe --

Adam: No -- no, never.

J.R.: Please.

Adam: All right, all right, maybe -- look, a lot has changed, son, and I want you to be happy. And if that means Babe, all the better. She's the reason I met Krystal. When I think of all the time I wasted fighting that attraction -- if I could just go back to the beginning.

Krystal: I remember the second I walked through that door, Adam was just the worst kind of nasty. Just pigheaded, stubborn, snotty, snarky, snobby, can't hear the word "no," won't accept defeat --

Babe: All the stuff that made you want to smack him.

Krystal: Yeah. And now I can't get enough.

Adam: You know exactly what I'm talking about.

J.R.: Hmm. No matter how much time I spend with Babe, I want to spend more -- see what she's going to do or say, or how she puts me in my place, calls me on my stuff.

Adam: Yeah. And if I may say, has bested you once or twice.

J.R.: Yeah. It's incredible. How does she do that?

Babe: J.R. let me know him. He let me in.

Krystal: Honey, you worked hard, and you've earned that. He did not just hand it over to you.

Babe: But everything that he's been through -- he lost his mom, to get her back, to find out that was all a lie? J.R.’s had to fight to protect himself. And now -- now he's given me his heart. And I'm grateful for that. For the chance --

Adam: To love again --

Krystal: Risk it all –

J.R.: To get it right –

Babe: To be a real family.

Adam: You want this for me. For us.

Babe: Let's go give the men their answer.

[Krystal giggles]

Krystal: Come on.

Livia: Lily thinks you don't respect her decisions.

Jack: Livia, a year ago she decided that the hot girls were her friends. For that decision, she was tortured. Now she's decided that this maniac is her boyfriend.

Livia: I agree with you -- it's not a good idea -- but if you treat her like she's a child --

Jack: Livia, please. You tell me, how do I send this naive teenage girl out into the world? How do I pretend -- how do I pretend that she can keep herself safe?

Livia: She may not be as naive as you think.

Jack: Oh, jeez. Jeez, please don't be telling me what I think you're telling me here.

Livia: I am not telling you that. All I am saying is that Lily may have a greater grasp on the world than you believe. What's sure is if you hold your daughter too close, you will lose her.

Amanda: Mom, please. You have to know how much I love you.

Brooke: Amanda, I just need a few minutes with your mother -- to go over the plea agreement that the DA offered?

Derek: I'll be right outside if you need me.

Janet: I'm not stupid, Brooke. I certainly don't need you to go over the details of this ridiculous plea bargain they've concocted for me.

Brooke: Oh, you're not stupid, Janet. You're just vicious and mean. And Amanda doesn't need to be tormented anymore.

Janet: I don't know who or what you're speaking of.

[Janet hums]

Brooke: Are you ready to listen? Because I have some things to say to you.

Di: If Dixie is headed to the Chandler estate, this could be bad. I mean, why didn't she leave before?

Zach: Unfinished business, I guess.

Di: Well, if she comes back here for any reason --

Zach: I'll give her the warning.

Di: Because David Hayward is not going to give up.

David: I need the video coverage from the VIP suite that Adam Chandler, III stayed in yesterday from approximately 2:00 to 3:00 PM.

Guard: What for?

David: Because I asked nicely. Did you ask nicely when you took that pain medication from the med locker? Did you ask anyone at all? Thank you. All right, Dixie, show yourself. Are you real? Did you come back to us?

Zach: Dixie? I'll take care of it. Do what you have to do.

Babe: Dig out your tux, Pops.

[Adam laughs]

Babe: You got to look sharp when you marry my mama today.

Adam: Oh, thank you. Thank you, Babe. Come here.

Babe: Let's get this party started.

Adam: Thank you, J.R.

J.R.: Yes.

Adam: And, Krystal -- thank you most of all.

Krystal: Oh, and let's not forget Little Adam for sharing his big day with us -- a bunch of crazy-in-love fools.

Babe: Exactly.

[Krystal laughs]

Babe: What are we going to wear?

Krystal: Oh, no.

J.R.: Oh, no, here comes the talk about the clothes.

Adam: Oh, yeah, music to my hears.

J.R.: You know you got it bad?

Krystal: Oh, wow, from moonshine to this -- what a wild ride.

Tad: All I can say is I hope you have some more, because I feel like I just slipped into an alternate universe.

Adam: Well, hello, Tad, welcome, welcome. Would you like a drink?

Tad: I swear to God, if I didn't know better, I'd think I was talking to Stuart.

Adam: Ha-ha! Well, I take that as a compliment. Is it true? Do I have sort of a Stuart kind of sparkle about me, sort of a West Virginia joie de vivre? Wouldn't that be marvelous?

Krystal: Well, there is a light there, honey, but it is all you.

Adam: Oh, correction -- it's all yours.

Tad: You got no reaction to this?

J.R.: Kettle, pot -- the whole thing.

Babe: We'll try not to get too gooey, but, you know, these things -- they can get tricky.

Tad: That does it -- there's got to be something in the water.

[Adam laughs]

Krystal: Well, why don't you just take the plunge, Tad? You never know what you're going to get -- or who you're going to get. The surprise is half the fun.

Tad: This is like a gift for Little Adam, right? It's like a one-time day of happy family?

Krystal: No, no, no, forget the one-time thing. We are swinging for the fences, going for a lifetime -- all of us.

Adam: Yeah.

Tad: I'll be fine. Just give me a minute. I got to sit down, loosen my tie. I'm just a little nauseous.


Julia: Yeah, if there's something you need, I'm always happy to help you.

Jonathan: Well, it -- it's not me, it's Lily. Could you give her some extra Life Skills classes one-on-one?

Julia: Well, I could, but she would have to ask me herself. Her recovery is her business, and your progress is yours.

Jonathan: I want Lily to have the best life possible, when she's happy and free.

Julia: Well, that's a beautiful sentiment, but I --

Jonathan: Can you teach Lily to have that life without me?

Lily: It's good you had company. Livia's very smart and interesting to talk to.

Jack: Yeah, she is. She mentioned to me that you were asking her about how people go about getting married.

Lily: Yeah, I was before, but I'm not talking about marriage anymore.

Jack: No?

Lily: No.

Jack: Well, that's -- how about if we talk about you and me?

Lily: Ok.

Jack: I get the feeling that you -- uh -- you don't like me much right now.

Lily: Julia told us in class to always speak with kindness and honesty.

Jack: I'd say that's very good advice. Please do.

Lily: I don't like you very much right now, and it confuses me, because I don't have any practice being mad at you.

Jack: No, it's new for me, too. Lily, I -- I know I upset you. I know that I hurt your feelings.

Lily: You wanted to send me away to my old school, and I -- I didn't want to go, but you didn't -- you didn't ask me. My feelings weren't a variable in the equation, it didn't -- it didn't matter. But I'm almost a grown woman now, even if you still think that I'm a stupid kid.

Jack: No. I never thought you were a stupid kid. I just -- honey, I just -- I just want to do what's right for you.

Lily: Well, right for me is you not telling me what to do.

Brooke: It's time for you to listen up. Amanda's not a prize or a party favor.

Janet: Now you're an expert on my daughter?

Brooke: Amanda is devastated. You turned her inside out. You forced her to cover your lies and your crimes, and she took the blame to protect you.

Janet: Well, I see -- now, this is about you and the rest of those drips in the back of the truck, isn't it? I wish the quicksand had been quicker.

Brooke: You killed Amanda's father. Now, you may have wanted Trevor gone, but Amanda loved him as much as she loved you.

Janet: I certainly felt loved when she turned me in.

Brooke: Could you just stop thinking about yourself for one minute and think about your daughter?

Janet: I lived my life for that child. I gave her everything.

Brooke: Yeah, and you'll keep on giving -- if you refuse that plea agreement. Oh, you'll give Amanda months of newspaper headlines and nightly news recaps. "Janet from Another Planet and her reign of terror."

Janet: I am innocent until I'm proven guilty!

Brooke: Well, Amanda's going to have to testify, isn't she? She's going to have to get on that stand and sit in that chair and raise her right hand, and she's going to be known forever as the girl who put her mother in prison. She will never be anything else, never, except for crazy Janet's daughter. I mean, think how Amanda is going to feel, knowing that for the rest of her life, everyday, people are watching her and waiting to see what kind of monster Janet's girl is going to turn out to be. The DA gave you a deal that you don't deserve. So be the decent mother that you think you are and take it -- for Amanda's sake.

Di: Something wrong with the water?

Tad: Quick, feel my forehead. Do I feel feverish? Do I look flushed? Am I acting like I'm in an altered state?

Di: Ok, yeah, maybe the last one. What -- what's going on?

Tad: I saw her --

Di: Who?

Tad: And him. I mean, they were -- you know, it's just the weirdest, surreal moment in my life. Just let me look at you for a second -- I got to wipe out that other visual. Better.

Di: Oh, God -- ok, I -- I love a good compliment, but you're freaking me out. What is going on, Tad?

Tad: I'm freaking you out? Adam, Krystal, Babe, J.R. -- the whole thing. The lunatics are running the asylum. They're happy.

Di: Oh.

Tad: Anyway, it doesn't matter, I'm with you. When I'm with you, all the weird stuff just disappears.

[Happening on the scene, J.R. stares at Tad and Di kissing.]

Jonathan: More -- more than Lily wants to be a detective or even be with me, she wants to be independent. But she can't be because she -- she leans on me. She knows she has me there.

Julia: Ok, so, do you -- do you feel like it's too much pressure? Because that would be understandable.

Jonathan: Oh, no. No. God, no. I -- I could spend the rest of my life being there for her, and -- and I would love that. But -- but then it would be me leading her life instead of her dad, and that's not what Lily wants. That's not what I want for her.

Julia: Ok. Well, what if Lily became so independent, she decided that she didn't want a boyfriend anymore, or maybe she wanted a different boyfriend?

Jonathan: Not me?

Julia: Yeah.

Jonathan: That would really suck. But -- but I'd have to deal with it.

Julia: Well, it's one thing to say that, but --

Jonathan: I want Lily to choose me because she wants to, not because she has to, and right now Lily mostly thinks that -- that she needs me in her life, but I want her to want me there. I -- I want her to really want me there.

J.R.: You know, it's strange to see you like that -- without Mom.

Tad: J.R., this is your day and Babe's. We don't have to go into this now.

J.R.: Mom's gone. You and Di -- you look happy.

Tad: Well, I am. Sorry.

J.R.: Well, then I guess I just have to get there. It's tough to be angry all the time and be in love.

Di: Seeing you and Babe in love -- it's so nice, J.R.

J.R.: And I want that for you, too. Hell, today I want it for the entire world.

Di: Huh.

J.R.: But definitely you.

Tad: You know something? I feel like I just watched you become the man I always wanted you to be and the kid you always were at the same time. I couldn't be more proud of you.

J.R.: You're not my mother, but you are my family, and I am so glad that you're here today for this.

David: Just give me some proof. Show yourself, Dixie. Just show -- wait. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Is that you, Dixie? Oh, dear God, let it be you.

Amanda: Mom? Mom, no matter what happens -- I'll be under oath. I'll have to tell the truth, but I swear -- I miss Daddy. I miss you, too.

Brooke: Come on, Amanda.

Derek: Your attorney will be here shortly.

[Cell door closes]

Janet: I'll take the plea.

Julia: Jonathan, I don't think you're crazy.

Jonathan: Just out of line?

Julia: No, just in love. It's just -- it's just a different kind of love than you usually see.

Jonathan: "Different"? I don't love Lily the right way?

Julia: No, you've got it right, Jonathan. More right than most people do.

Jack: I was wrong to try to send you to your old school. I was wrong to treat you like the little girl you used to be, the one that used to need me to make all her decisions for her.

Lily: I want to make my own decisions. I want you to let me.

Jack: I know that. Lily, I'm your dad -- that'll never change -- but this is all new to me. I've never gotten to watch my little girl grow up before. I mean, Greenlee -- she was already grown when I -- I'll need your help.

Lily: With what?

Jack: I want you to help me become the father that can help you become the woman that you're meant to be.

Lily: I like that idea.

Jack: Yeah?

Lily: I'll help you.

Jack: All right. With you helping me, I can't fail, can I?

Babe: I am sure that they'll realize there's other people here eventually. Oh, my goodness.

J.R.: A toast. To love -- when and where you least expect it.

All: To love.

Babe: Cheers.

David: Is that you, Dixie? I say we do this the democratic way -- let's put it to a vote. Oh. Ohh.

[Just as David sees a clear image of Dixie on the surveillance tape, Zach appears and knocks him out from behind.]

[Dixie arrives at the Chandler estate and admiringly gazes at the wedding décor.]

>> On the next "All My Children" --

Zach (to Janet): You killed my son.

Kendall (to Greg): Ryan's right. You crossed the line.

Di (to Dixie): If you're here to make a big scene, tell us now.

Minister (to the assembled guests): Three generations of Chandler men welcome you to witness the marriage of J.R. and Babe and the renewal of vows of Adam and Krystal.

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