All My Children Transcript Friday 12/30/05
Provided By Boo
Proofread by Gisele
Ryan: No New Year's Eve glitz? Good thing I brought this.
Julia: Do you know CPR?
Ryan: Yes, but -- whoa!
Aidan: You know, it's not too late to change your mind, you know. Why don't you let me take you to that bash at the Valley Inn, huh?
Erin: It's a lovely idea, it is, but I'm allergic to formalwear, so --
Aidan: Well, then we'll go to SOS. There's a DJ. We'll have some margaritas. There's not a tuxedo in sight.
Erin: Trust me, ok? This is going to be a New Year's you won't ever forget, right down to the fabulous meal.
[Dressed as a waiter, Janet holds out a drink for Babe.]
J.R.: How about a toast?
Babe: Are you trying to get me tipsy, so you can have your way with me?
J.R.: I'm all about respect for the mother of my son.
J.R.: If you'll take a closer look, it's just sparkling water. How far would I get?
Babe: I guess you'll just have to wait and find out.
J.R.: In that case, why don't we forget the drink and go dance.
Babe: Thanks anyway.
[Babe declines Janet's doctored drink.]
Janet: How rude!
[Janet holds up her silver drink tray and sees her reflection wearing a black wig and glasses.]
Janet's Image: Nice job. You totally blew it!
Janet: But there's still time.
Janet's Image: Not hardly. Now, listen -- do you want Babe to pay fair and square for all the nasties she's done to Amanda? Then the sooner you get that extra special water down her throat, the better.
Janet: Over the lips and past the gums.
Krystal: Well, if I had known you were coming, I would have brought my bow and arrow. Of course, this little thing didn't come with pockets.
Adam: It'll take more than a toy to fend me off.
Palmer: I'll throw him out. Just say the word, Krystal.
Krystal: Oh, no, no, no. Adam is not going to ruin my new year. Why don't you just go huff and puff at somebody else?
Palmer: Yeah, preferably far, far away. Oh.
Krystal: To my husband and a new year from hell.
Janet's Image: Oops.
Kendall: What is all this?
Zach: Whatever we make it.
Kendall: My favorite flowers. Lots of them. And lights, music. It's even heated. What are you trying to pull?
Zach: I couldn't bring you summer, so I thought this would be the next best thing.
Singer: Through all these years and bitter tears
Kendall: This song.
Zach: You like it?
Kendall: Something tells me you knew I would.
Singer: Here you are in my view. I can't seem
Zach: I hope you're hungry.
Singer: To get enough of you
Kendall: Lobster. Of course.
Zach: Out of the shell, so you don't have to wrestle with him this time.
Kendall: Thank you.
Singer: Your love in my life is more than I can see. With love as our light, I know that we can last through the dark of the night. It'll be you and I
Singer: How was I to know you still could? My lonely heart has come apart, and I feel like the only one. How was I to know what I would feel? An open door. And I was floored. You showed me what's real and there you are in my view, and I can't seem to get enough of you
Ryan: Hey, where's the patient?
Julia: I -- I am the patient. I am so freaked, I can't -- I can't even breathe. My heart is pounding so much, I think I'm going to combust. The NCLEX is coming up.
Ryan: The -- the -- what?
Julia: National Council Licensure Examination, the state nursing boards.
Ryan: Oh. You're going to do great. You just got to get back on the bike.
Julia: Oh, yeah, that's what I thought -- just open the book, and it'll all come back. Wrong. There's so much new stuff, I can't believe how much has changed in nine years.
Ryan: How about I help you?
Julia: Oh, no. No, you've got a lot better things to do on New Year's Eve than help me cram.
Ryan: And miss the "nonpharmacological comfort interventions"? No way, not a chance. Or how about the "pharmacological interactions" or the "central venous access devices"? Have you ever thought about dog walking? Because in dog walking, there's no tests, and you know what? There's no big words either, like these ones. You just got to worry about where the good hydrants are, that's it.
Julia: Yeah, well, I might need something to fall back on.
Ryan: You're going to do great. Come on, let's crack this code together!
Aidan: All right. You come here often?
Erin: Nope, first time. It actually belongs to Mike, the owner of the Pine Cone.
Aidan: Oh, right. Yeah, I recognize the decor.
Aidan: Some real home touches.
Erin: He swears the fishing can't be beat.
Aidan: Well, you know, we're going to have to dig the hole in the ice first.
Erin: Uh-huh -- already been done. Mike staked out the best spot on the lake for us. I mean, you're up for this, right? You Special-Ops guys are all about adventure.
Aidan: Yeah, usually with a side of steak, slaughtered and cooked by somebody else, but this is -- yeah, right up my street. Couldn't think of anything better.
Erin: Great. Well, let's see, we got -- we got rods, reels, jigs, bobbers. We got everything we need. So why don't you go ahead and bait the hooks -- here you go -- and I will fire up the stove.
Aidan: Do you mind if I use bread?
Erin: Aidan, are you afraid of worms?
Aidan: I just hate killing the little buggers, that's all. It's a holiday, ok? It just doesn't seem right. I have an idea.
Aidan: How about we use this.
Erin: You're going to use gumdrops?
Aidan: Maybe they have a sweet tooth.
Amanda: It's like a dream come true, Jamie -- the perfect way to end the year.
Jamie: You had a pretty rough one. You know, if you want to unload anything, now's your chance. You can start the new year out fresh.
Amanda: You know, I have made a resolution that will make 2006 the best year ever.
Jamie: Really? It sounds great.
Amanda: As of midnight, I am new and improved, Jamie. No more dirty tricks or holding on to grudges or hurting back harder. I am going to live and let live.
Jamie: Does that include Babe and J.R.?
Amanda: I want to be in a better place, so that we can be in a better place. You mean so much to me, Jamie. I don't want to mess that up again.
Jamie: To the new-and-improved you.
Brooke: I promise I will take it under consideration. But now --
Brooke: Make it a double.
J.R.: Jamie and Amanda. It looks serious. Does that bother you?
Babe: You bother me.
J.R.: It's one of my best features.
Babe: I know that Jamieís just pretending to fall for Amanda, so he can find out if she's the one that's been blitzing me and half the town. The funny thing is, is you knew, too, and you didn't tell me.
J.R.: Slipped my mind?
Babe: Right. You think I still have a thing for Jamie, and you wanted me to think that they're still together just to see if I'd twist over it. Another test.
J.R.: I'm almost crazy about you, but I'm not crazy. You know, you might be one of the hottest girls in this room, and I might want to kiss the daylights out of you. That doesn't mean that I trust you.
Palmer: You are the most fascinating, dazzling woman. Could I have the pleasure of this dance?
Krystal: Oh, Palmer, you are the sweetest thing, and I would like nothing better than to trip the light with you again, but -- you know what? I'm feeling a little bit flushed. I think I'm going to go outside and get a little fresh air and cool off. Enjoy yourself while you can.
Palmer: Oh, what a woman.
Opal: Panting over Adamís leftovers, are you?
Palmer: Good heavens, woman. Will you never learn? Why don't you go home and watch the ball drop on TV, stop trolling New Year's Eve parties for fresh meat.
Opal: Au contraire, you old toad. You're the only one trolling here tonight. I got a date.
Palmer: Yeah? The invisible man?
Opal: No, no. Him.
Del: Hello, Palmer. She is beautiful, isn't she?
Opal: Oh Ė
[After Krystal walks outside and faints to the ground, Janet kneels over her.
Janet: You Carey women are capital-T trouble! Is it so hard to understand? My daughter is in love. Jamie loves her right back and he would marry her if you and your baby doll hadn't interfered. And if you cannot come do the right thing and step aside, then what choice do I really have? A mother's got to take care of her own any way she can.
J.R.: You swept off your feet yet?
Babe: Oh, I still have a couple of toes left on the ground, but I could use a snack.
J.R.: I'll be right back.
Josh: Hey, gorgeous.
Josh: Tell me you're alone and mine for the night.
Babe: I am not alone, and I don't belong to anybody.
Josh: I give you fair warning, my dear -- you are my New Year's resolution. And I always keep my resolutions.
Babe: Oh, not this one, you don't.
Josh: Why, because you're tight with your ex? Such a beautiful girl. Such a bad idea.
Babe: Such a hot guy and so full of it.
Josh: I guess you don't care if I say you're making a huge mistake.
Babe: I don't, because I'm not.
Amanda: Why are you ringing in the New Year with Babe?
J.R.: Amanda, go away.
Amanda: If I were you, I'd make a resolution real quick -- open your eyes and dump Babe before she ends up with your son and your share of the Chandler bling.
J.R.: At least when Babe wants something, she doesn't try to kill people to get it.
Jamie: Looking hot, Mom. How's the date?
Brooke: I'd rather talk about your date.
Jamie: Well, at least she's not Babe.
Brooke: Well, I almost wish she were -- almost.
Jamie: It's really no big deal, Mom.
Brooke: Listen, can the innocent act. Your father told me you think Amanda's up to no good, and you're romancing her along until you get the truth.
Jamie: Yeah, it's a tough job, but somebody's got to do it.
Brooke: It's not a laughing matter, Jamie. Amanda is potentially dangerous.
Jamie: Your date's waiting for you.
Brooke: You know what? You're just like your father. You're impossible to reason with.
Jamie: But very cute. Save me a dance.
Adam: Happy New Year, Brooke.
Brooke: Do you want me to hurt you?
Adam: You used to enjoy it.
Brooke: Where's your wife?
Adam: I haven't really noticed. How could I with you here?
Brooke: Oh. You know, your desperation is showing. Either you're playing this for Krystal, or are you trying to seduce me?
Adam: If I were?
Brooke: I'm sorry, I'm not interested in being played or seduced.
Adam: I've missed you, Brooke, the thing we have. Say what you want, it will never change.
Brooke: But you are married.
Adam: Well, that's never stopped us -- I mean, seldom stopped us in the past.
Brooke: Excuse me. My date is looking for me.
Babe: Oh, you sure know how to put on the moves.
Josh: Well, I do have a million of them.
Josh: Hey. You want me to break my resolution already?
[Janet finally succeeds in getting Babe to down her special drink.]
Babe: Thank you. Oh. I didn't realize how thirsty I was.
[After their private meal, Zach and Kendall dance closely together.]
Singer: Picture the sky. That is how high I reach so far. In life none have been right for me, but your love is a chance I'd like to take. With each breath in me, Iíll wake if it brings you back to me, because I'm free, and I'm young. I'm the loneliest star from the sun, but I'm feeling I'm close to the one who will stop me from coming undone.
Erin: Where are all the fish? Mike swore that we would catch more than we could eat and that there was even this one big granddaddy of them all, could feed a family of ten. So where is he? Huh? Where are you?
Aidan: You know, fishermen have been known to stretch the truth.
Erin: Yeah, well, this fisherwoman is hungry, starving. I've got a better idea, actually. Let's do a run to BJís, and we'll pick up some food and a bottle of champagne, and then we'll come back here and try our luck again.
Aidan: Nope. Can't.
Erin: Why not?
Aidan: Man versus nature.
Erin: Woman versus starvation.
Aidan: You keep that stove warm. Ok, we're not leaving here without a fish.
J.R.: Is your bed buddy a good dancer?
Babe: Josh is terrific at just about everything.
J.R.: Including getting you naked in bed?
Babe: Come on, you know that that was a setup to help me get rid of Jamie.
J.R.: Yeah, and put him in pole position.
Babe: If I wanted to be with Josh or Jamie, I would be. In case you hadn't noticed, I'm here with you, J.R.
J.R.: Yeah, but you were still upset when you found out Jamie hooked back up with Amanda.
Babe: Yes, Jamie and I do have a history, and I don't want to see him get hurt, and if anyone could bring the hurt on, it's Amanda. So, are you going to interrogate me some more, or are we ready to have some fun?
J.R.: I can't wait to see how.
Waiter: Excuse me, Ms. Carey? Your mother would like to see you outside.
Babe: Ok. Thank you. I'll be right back.
J.R.: I'll be waiting.
Brooke: Oh, I guess this is where I say thank you for the dance. Still looking for Krystal?
Adam: No, I just -- I'm going to make sure she's not doing shooters with the board of directors. The woman's a walking embarrassment.
Brooke: You can't get enough of her. You know what, though? I think you and I have had enough.
Babe: Mama? Are you out here?
[After Babe falls unconscious to the ground, Janet approaches her pushing a large table on wheels.]
Janet: Well, if at first you don't succeed, try, try again. It's time to go nighty-night, baby doll.
Ryan: What is the current optimal treatment for AIDS?
Julia: HAART therapy, which is the use of three or more antiretroviral drugs. "HAART" stands for "Highly Active Antiretroviral Therapy."
Ryan: And what is the goal of the treatment?
Julia: To reduce the viral load to a level that is no longer detectable in the blood.
Ryan: Ahem. Nice. And now for the bonus question. Can you name those antiretroviral drugs?
Julia: NRTIS, NNRTIS, protease inhibitors, fusion inhibitors, and nucleotide reverse transcriptase inhibitors.
Ryan: 100%, ladies and gentlemen!
Ryan: Good job.
Julia: Ah! Now can I have my champagne?
Ryan: Hey, no, no, because we're not done. We're not done.
Julia: Why -- why?
Ryan: This is the most important part. I mean, the bedside manner quiz.
Julia: There is no bedside manner quiz.
Ryan: Yeah, there is. You got to tell me a joke.
Julia: A joke?
Ryan: Yeah. It's, like, the most important part about being a nurse, because laughter is the best medicine.
Julia: Ha. Unless you die laughing.
Ryan: You're not getting out of this.
Ryan: Nice try, but you have to tell me a joke. You stand right here. I'm going to give you an audience. Ok, let me just get these down here. Go ahead. Lay it on me.
Julia: Ok, um -- why was six afraid of seven?
Ryan: I don't know.
Julia: Because seven ate nine.
Ryan: That was actually pretty funny.
Julia: And that was a mercy laugh.
Ryan: Yeah, you're right, it was. No, it wasn't!
Ryan: It wasn't. It wasn't.
Julia: I'll have you know that when I volunteered in Pediatrics that was a total hit.
Ryan: Well, you know, you got a career in standup comedy, I think, for everybody under the age of 10.
Julia: Ah, well, I haven't given up the dog-walking gig yet, either.
Ryan: No, no, you were born to be a nurse. And this patient right here needs what we call in the medical business a corkectomy.
Ryan: Oh! Whoo!
Julia: So -- I do love a good bottle of champagne.
Ryan: Kendall decided to have the baby.
Singer: I have been close. I have been almost near
Kendall: This has been the best divorce celebration ever. We should do it again sometime. Well, not the divorce.
Zach: You think I ended this marriage, because I don't love you? I do love you. I told you that in your apartment. I told you that on the island. And from where I'm standing right now, it looks like I'm going to love you until the day I die.
Kendall: You love me.
Zach: I do.
Kendall: Why are -- why are you doing this again? We already did this. This is settled. It's done, Zach. We're divorced.
Zach: Well, that shouldn't have happened.
Kendall: We agreed. Our marriage was business.
Zach: Business, yes. But somewhere between finding the licenses for the casino and counting our profits, I saw you. I saw the woman that you really are. And I fell in love with you. I tried to keep that to myself, you know, I had every intention of keeping that to myself, but, of course, I didn't. And -- I don't know. Maybe it was bad timing, maybe it was bad circumstances. Doesn't really matter what, but you didn't believe me. So I walked away, because I thought that's what you wanted, and I made a mistake.
Kendall: How can you be so sure that this is not another mistake?
Zach: Oh, you know what? Somewhere along the way, I swear, I thought you loved me, too. And then I thought about my actions and my record and -- and I -- are you afraid of me? Hmm. You afraid to trust me and feel for me?
Kendall: Did Bianca put you up to this?
Zach: Your sister thinks we're perfect for each other.
Kendall: She's been in France too long. L'amour and all that.
Zach: It's because we're both a little screwed up.
Kendall: Yeah, well, she got that part right.
Zach: And we both haven't been completely honest with the other.
Kendall: I'm going to kill my sister. What, she couldn't save our marriage, so she wants to try to help me and then have you take pity on her poor pregnant sister? Is that it? Is this pity? Zach, I don't need your pity, ok? I don't need your pity or you.
Zach: You tell me how you feel, right now. Tell me what makes you happy. Tell me, and I'll do it. Tell me how to love you.
Ryan: I don't have the best track record with major decisions.
Julia: You'll do what's right for you and Kendall and the baby.
Ryan: And, you see, that's what I keep telling myself -- that, but the problem is I don't have a clue what the right thing is.
Julia: I know the feeling.
Ryan: You do? You? You seem to have everything on track.
Julia: I killed a man, Ryan. And at the time, I justified it. But nursing, helping people is a way for me to work through that, to be able to live with myself again and to have a future that I want and maybe save some lives along the way.
Ryan: So do you think if I see Kendall through the pregnancy, do you think that will help me find where I need to go?
Julia: Could be. At least it's something to focus on.
Ryan: It's just I don't even know which way is up, and -- and there's this -- this little guy who's depending on me to make decisions that will affect the rest of his life.
Julia: You do the best you can.
Ryan: And what if that isn't good enough?
Julia: Hey, you just have to do it.
Aidan: You see the size of that thing? It was huge. It must have been the granddaddy.
Erin: No, I couldn't see it. Your ego must have been in the way.
Aidan: I single-handedly fight off Jaws, and that's how you treat me?
Erin: Oh. Oh, it's a shark. Huh. Silly me. And I thought sharks were drawn to flesh, not gumdrops.
Aidan: Ok, you have a good point. Maybe it was a giant squid, then.
Erin: Hmm. Let's see. Nope. No fever. And definitely no giant squid.
Aidan: Where is the heart, woman? You shutting down my fish story? You know, we leave here without a fish, we've got to come up with some kind of story. What are you laughing at?
Erin: I just -- I had this whole picture of tonight, you know? We'd catch all these trout and fry them up, something totally cool and new, but this is better. This is fun.
Aidan: Don't sound so surprised.
Erin: Oh, it's kind of a foreign concept in my life -- fun, you know? Hey --
Erin: Wait. That's it. That is my New Year's resolution. I am going to have fun. I'm going to have lots of it, as often as possible.
Aidan: Well, lucky for you. I'm an expert. You want to have fun? I'll make it happen.
Erin: You're on. Whoo!
Aidan: Good shot.
Simone: Oh. All right, I've decided. I win.
Ethan: What were we playing?
Simone: The luckiest lady here.
Ethan: Ah --
Simone: Yes. See, I have the perfect man who won't turn into a pumpkin at midnight, or a jerk, ever. And, of course, I am a cosmetic queen and --
Ethan: Absolutely gorgeous?
Simone: Oh, stop it.
Ethan: Listen, now that we've established I'm not going to turn into a cad, is there anything I should know about you? Any weird quirks, ticks, proclivities? You know, a tendency to howl at the moon at night and make --
Simone: Well, there is this one little thing. Every year around this time, I can't help myself. It's this mix of men and bubbles. I just turn into this raving she-devil. Yeah.
Ethan: You can breathe all the fire you want, darling.
J.R.: Jamie, have you seen Babe? She said she was going to go meet Krystal somewhere, but -- where's Amanda?
Jamie: She said she was going to go powder her nose. She couldn't have gone far. I'll go find her.
Janet: Excuse me. Excuse me, please. Coming through. Oh. Excuse me, thank you.
[As Janet pushes a table through the crowd, a hand falls to the floor which she quickly tucks back under the tablecloth.]
Jamie: Hey. Where'd you get off to?
Amanda: Well, I didn't push Babe down any stairs or poison the champagne, if that's what you're worried about.
Jamie: No, I wasn't worried. I missed you.
Jamie: Of course. And Babe was missing, so I was hoping she didn't come after you again.
Amanda: She didn't. I haven't seen her. Half the people in this room wish I was anywhere but here.
Jamie: Ignore them. Especially Babe and J.R. I want this to be an amazing night, you and me. No distractions, no drama.
Amanda: You make me feel so safe.
Jamie: That is exactly how I want you to feel. Safe enough to share anything.
Amanda: You really mean that, don't you?
Jamie: Why else would I be kicking off the new year with you?
[Janet wordlessly hands J.R. a Valley Inn room key.]
J.R.: Babe, you wench.
[Josh walks into the hotel room.]
Josh: What the hell Ė
Julia: Hey, those are my notes on nosocomial infection.
Ryan: Which you have completely memorized, I might add.
Ryan: You see? There goes my career in Aeronautics. Ugh!
Julia: Oh, hey, there's always that dog-walking gig.
Ryan: True. So what made you decide to be a nurse?
Julia: What, you mean instead of becoming an MD, like Maria? There are lots of ways to save lives. And a doctor is more concerned with diagnosis and prognosis and treatment. And they spend more time with charts and labs than they do with the people they're actually treating. And a nurse is there to hold a patient's hand before they go into surgery or in the middle of the night when they're in pain. And when a patient doesn't know what to do next or what to do, a nurse is there to help them through it.
Ryan: Huh. Wait a second. Was I, like, a test patient or something? Because I've been a bit of a mess since I got back. You know, I lost Greenlee and freaked about the baby and -- anybody else would have split.
Julia: I don't scare easy.
Ryan: No, you don't. I mean, you didn't tell me everything was going to be ok and then just move on to weather and sports. You looked me in the eye and you made me believe that you knew something about me that I didn't know. You made me believe that I have everything I need to get through.
Julia: Well, thanks to you, I'm ready for my nursing exam.
Julia: Now all I have to do is ace them.
Ryan: Ace them. Oh.
Kendall: I didn't -- I didn't expect -- I don't -- how am I supposed to do this?
Zach: You don't trust me. And that's ok. I see that. I've lied to you. I've lied to a lot of people about a lot of things. But I'm not lying now. I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want to go to sleep with you and wake up with you and face whatever the new day has to bring with you. And I want to laugh and cry, and I want to make love to you. I do, and I don't -- I don't want to change who you are. I love who you are. And I love who you've been. And I love who you're going to be. But, you know, whatever you've decided, it doesn't matter, because I'm going to honor you. And if you don't want me in your life, I -- I will walk away from you, I promise.
Kendall: I -- I can't. Zach, I can't do this.
Erin: We still haven't caught a single fish.
Aidan: What is the time? That's because they're probably getting ready to celebrate. It's almost midnight.
Ryan: Ah. Just enough to ring in the new year. Last toast of '05. To friendship.
Julia: To friendship. I'm glad you're sticking around.
Kendall: I'm sorry.
Zach: Happy New Year.
Kendall: Zach, wait.
Palmer: Attention! Attention, everybody! Whoa! Attention! All right! Let's get ready to bring in 2006!
[Everyone cheers as Janet and the other waiters wheel in a huge cake.]
[J.R. walks into the hotel room and finds Josh holding Babe's hand as she lies in bed.]
Palmer: 10 --
All: 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1 -- Happy New Year!
["Auld Lang Syne" plays as a groggy Krystal pops out of the giant cake wearing only a crown and a banner across her naked body.]
Erin: Happy New Year! Happy New Year to you, too.
Aidan: Happy New Year.
[Aidan and Erin kiss.]
Ryan: Ah. Happy New Year, Nurse Keefer.
Julia: Hmm. This is going to be a good year, Ryan, for both of us.
Ryan: I'm going to hold you to that.
[Ryan kisses Julia on the cheek.]
Kendall: I love you. I do. I love you. I love you so much.
[Zach and Kendall kiss passionately as fireworks explode above them.]
>> On the next "All My Children" --
Ryan (to Julia): I thought we both agreed --
Julia (to Ryan): No kissing. Oh, absolutely. But nobody said anything about not getting naked.
Babe (to Amanda): You messed with the wrong girl this time.
Kendall (to Zach): You know this will never work.
Zach (to Kendall): Not a chance in the world.
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